r/Bestof I Found My Long-Lost Brother
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- čas přidán 24. 07. 2024
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0:00 Intro
0:09 Found my brother
4:13 Step dad vs bio dad
11:32 Embarrassing encounter
"Sneaky Snitch" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) License: CC By Attribution 3.0 - Komedie
"You can't give me away at my wedding when you gave me away 20 years ago as your child"
Hello? Police? I would like to report a verbal manslaughter.
r/muderedbywords
r/murderbywords material 👍
That was an iconic burn!
Pure poetry. (chef's kiss)
r/murderedbywords
I feel that the hypocrisy of her dad not wanting his daughter at his wedding but still wanting to give his daughter away at her wedding deserved more attention. Honestly, he should be glad he's invited at all.
Exactly and also it’s not like he paid for anything. Further showing how entitled he feels.
He didn’t even want to congratulate her. Just to show off as the father of the bride and get attention and praise for doing f all
Honestly, I don't even think he will come anyway if he get the role to walk her down aisle.
So nothing is lost
I could understand the dad being miffed if he paid for it all and then she pulled that stunt.
Story 1: that's not parenting or discipline. That's abuse. People like OPs mom don't deserve kids.
Yep
fact and I bet that wasn't the first time OP mom beat her brother and she even told him you ain't my kid that would hurt any kid at any age and ran away and that if I was OP I would cut all contact with her after that like OP father did
FRRRR BRO
i mean he did deserve that ass whoopin but the not her son part is the issue
@@lame1191 he fucking didn't, he was 9, he's just a kid. The punishment should fit the crime and beating children isn't gonna teach them shit. Don't ever have kid please
The last story KILLED ME. I know the daughter was dreadfully embarrassed but she's fine. OP is an awesome dad and I wish them both the best. I'm sure in 10 years they'll be busting out laughing about this.
Oh I’m sure she’s just mortified right now 😂 she’ll be fine. No one wants to get caught by their parents while they’re…ya know 😅 I’m sure they’ll be laughing about it in a few years too
It absolutely boggles my mind that she was in the living room 😂 At that age, I wouldn’t dare step out of my room or bathroom buttnaked for fear of stories like this.
I'll be sure to keep an eye out for the inevitable "AITA for telling the story about the time my daughter was rubbing one out buck naked in the living room during her wedding speeches?".
who tf even watches pron NAKED NOT EVEN IN YOUR HOUSE BUT AT YOUR DADS HOUSE ON THE BIG SCREEN.
the amount of second-hand embarrassment I felt made me want to literally melt into the ground. I couldn't imagine being her. She's a better person than me because if that ever happened to me, I'd get plastic surgery, change my name, and move to a different country.
Story 2: OP's Bio-dad stopped being OP's father after he started mistreating her, and he as some serious audacity to think he's still a good father just because he paid child support. Lenny is the real father here, being there for OP and all her achievements.
And yeah, he sounds like he can't handle the reality when OP lays it out in front of him. He needs to accept his failures
Op’s Bio-“dad” would rather think he’s a good dad then admit he did anything wrong
And funny how he recruited his mistress to do his dirty work and call OP about how she hurt his feelings. Screw the fact he’s done nothing but hurt OPs feelings for decades.
I hope OP officially goes no contact with him and those who backed out of the wedding to side with him. She has no obligations to him
hope the bio daddy will be uninvited "because he would be bitter and ruin the ceremony"
his side of the family belongs in the trash bin too
@bibigamer502 i've taken to calling breeders egg/sperm donors when they clearly aren't parents where it counts
Weapons grade delusion.
In my experience as a once 6-year-old child, kids that age typically like any new, exciting thing they get to do with their parents. I think you're right in that she probably wasn't the one to suggest fishing and wouldn't have come up with it on her own, but I'd bet she was super excited to do it regardless, just because she wanted to have fun with her father.
My thoughts exactly.
I agree. My dad took me fishing once when I was 8 (I'm a girl) and I loved spending the one on one time with him and got so excited when I caught a fish!
What I was thinking
Lol I used to go fishing with my dad, I usually ended up leaving him in charge of both poles and going to search for reptiles and amphibians instead. Still really enjoyed the trips :-)
This is exactly what I was thinking. As a female, I used to live fishing with my dad when I was little(still do actually) because it was time that I got to spend with my dad, which isn't something I got to do much because of his job.
Last story: The daughter clearly didn't think it through seeing as she was fully naked in the living room leaving her no escape plan in the event something happens, like it did.
Oof
Yes. Right in the open and naked? Too risky.
To be fair, she is 15 and probably didn't think she would get caught. I had a similar thing happen to me when I was a teenager. Mom walked in on me. Super awkward but I was in the living room so it was my own fault.
@@eric98292at 15 I was still extremely careful. Nothing was taking place outside a locked bedroom or bathroom
@@eric98292I was the same way at home because it was rare for both my parents plus my sister to be gone simultaneously for long/predictable stretches.
But I have an ex who was an only child of a single mother and we definitely risked it at his place, because the odds of her coming home 4+ hours early were virtually nonexistent.
rSlash, the first story has a super wholesome ending. I'm so happy that OP found their brother and are catching up. Please do more wholesome stories.
Wait who’s whose which ever is correct lol
@@mattybrunolucaszeneresalas9072idk what you're trying to say but "whose" is possessive and "who's" is the contraction of "who is"
Lenny you are a Godsend. More stepfathers need to be more like you
OP obviously agrees since she said that Lenny would be her kids' grandfather. I've no doubt that Lenny will be a superb grandfather.
For all intensive purposes Lenny IS ops father
He's not a stepdad, he's the dad that stepped up
@jalindepriest7311 I hate that phrase. You know know how many people has said that line expecting a pat on the back just for being present but contributing nothing of value
Lenny lost the title step father when he not only stepped up but built a home for op. He is the father.
2nd story: "Are you still upset about the past?"
This isn't the past. This is the present. The dad is still doing this. Nothing has changed.
Well I can't be upset about the future because it hasn't happened yet. What's so strange about being upset by the past?
This is consequences of his actions.
First Story: I get being upset over the kid breaking the tv while playing with the ball in the house but how OP's mom went about punishment is insanely wrong. Beating ur child and basically saying u are disowning him is not something u just "say in the heat of the moment. What did OP's mom expect to happen after what she said to her own son? Wow this guy is a different breed of mature; his mom caused him to runaway and suffer a lot in his life and he is still willing to forgive her for everything. I wish this man nothing but the best in the coming future. The coincidence OP had here is insane
Second Story, NTA: This man has the nerve to be upset with the fact he won't walk OP down the isle when in reality he was never a dad to OP from the start. The fact that Lenny was more of a father to OP than this deadbeat ever was speaks a lot of volume. This man don't deserve the title of OP's dad and he has no right to claim OP as his daughter when he was barely/never in OP's life. Lmaoooo he was a "great father"? To who? I sure as hell wasn’t to OP. Lmaoooo he has the audacity to have a broken heart when everything OP said to him was HIS choices HE made. Funny how he never even apologize or took accountablility
Third Story: Wow that is very awkward. Obviously it was an accident and all but I can’t imagine how both OP and his daughter feels in this situation. I think she is just insanely embarassed. I’m glad everything worked out in the end. Now I think she thought OP was really mad at her for what she did
That was my first thought. Who the fuck beats their kid and disowns them as punishment for breaking a TV? I also doubt that was the first time as that behavior and your kid running away doesn't come out of nowhere. The father was right to blame and divorce her.
@@autisticwitch7581agreed
why do you comment here so much
@@godlegend-jz8kv
Whats wrong with that?
I swear to god, parents will do and say shit to their own kids that they wouldn't dare do to an adult. I used to be the childhood scapegoat too, and I have never once even yelled at one of my loved ones in anger, let alone beat them or effectively disown them. I'm just incapable of understanding the mentality of being that hateful to someone you love 'in the heat of the moment.' It just literally doesn't compute in my head.
I was a teenager once. I have had two teenage kids. Her father walking in on her must have been horrifying! As an adult, it is absolutely hilarious. I'm glad the dad and daughter made up.
Having been kicked out by my parents in my teens, that first story made me sob. I met some not very good people when I was on my own years ago. I understand him.
does it have anything to do with being trans :(
?
@@LuciusLucius nope. Honestly, i'd have preferred if it did. At least I would've been able to rationalize it by saying my parents are just bigots, but they're not. They don't care who I am. My mother is a narcissist who prefers my sister, and my dad prioritizes his girlfriend's every whim. Even my grandparent's place was a no go, my grandma's nuts. Had to get out of their house for my own sanity. I was kicked out 5 times, my parents pushing me onto the next one like an unwanted hot potato. Ended up getting my own place at 17. I'm 22 now, starting university in 2 weeks 😁. I'm going to be a therapist!
@@soulgazer11 Damn look at you go. Good luck in uni!
@@soulgazer11GOODLUCK!!❤
2nd story- as a girl, I can tell you my dad took me fishing and I HATED it. But, the memories that I have of being on the water, catching my first (very small) fish, releasing it back is so precious to me. Even more so now because my dad is no longer here. So for me, fishing with my dad is only about the memories and the quality time that he shared with me.
I enjoy going fishing for it being an activity to bond with family not for it being fishing regardless of gender you usually want to be on good terms with your family to promise that and then back out forever is a no
As someone who would be glad if I never had to go fishing again, I didn't mind it so much as a little girl. Yeah, I'd get bored. As an adult, the BEST Christmas presents I've ever gotten from my parents has been tickets to see live theater. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE theater, but the time with my parents withough my siblings or other distractions is priceless. As a kid, I didn't get this alone time, especially with my dad. So yeah, even though I hate fishing, I look back fondly on the many fishing and camping trips I had with my family growing up. My family couldn't afford fancy trips, but we could afford to go camping. So we did. I appreciate my parents for doing the best they could with what they had. Also, I know plenty of women/girls who love fishing. If my dad wasn't into fishing, I probably never would have went, but at 6, you have to be exposed to things to know if you like them.
Story 2: Dad has no right to complain, he didn't just drop the ball, he destroyed it and left it to fester in the sun. Just like his relationship with OP.
Story 2: Damn, in the end, the father still didn’t attend any of OP’s events. He had a chance to make up for any of his past show up failures, yet still couldn’t be bothered and was too ashamed/prideful to give his “only daughter” congratulations on her future happiness. Hopefully OP starts calling him by name bc he is a stranger, not her father.
As someone who has been in the same situation as OPs daughter in the last post, it is something that will sadly haunt her for the rest of time. Best advice I can give to her is stay cautious when alone and watch the videos on your phone instead of the TV
I'm sorry but I'm faking death or emigrating because either one is better than facing up to it 😖😳
I think if you ask any parent if they'd rather catch their kid rubbing one out or doing the dirty with another person, it'll be masturbation for the win every time. I'd probably say something like, "this is embarrassing, but good to know everything's in working order. if you have any questions about porn or sex positions please ask; I just want you to be safe and enjoying yourself when you're ready to be s*xually active. "
@@littlemisseatscrispsforbre5353Ong
I'm so glad OP handled it like an adult should: reassure the kid they didn't do anything wrong and take steps not to have to see it again. Though I live alone and still feel weird watching the videos on my laptop, let alone the tv, so good on the daughter for learning what she likes and bless the poor dad trying to help them both move on.
@@littlemisseatscrispsforbre5353 completely rational. I don't blame the daughter here at all. Just glad OP did the best he could so that they can now pretend it never happened.
Story 1: “everyone blamed my mother. My dad divorced her and her parents basically disowned her”
…GOOD, she 10000% deserved it.
No i DONT care that brother broke a tv, she kicked a CHILD out of the house. Honestly that brother is a MUCH better person than i am, i’d never want to see that vile woman again.
Op i’m sooo glad you 2 found each other though, this story brought a tear to my eyes.
She BEAT HIM and kicked him out of the house.
I completely agree.
She 1000% deserved everything she got and I honestly hope OP's brother remains NC because she doesn't deserve that relationship
Same!
Story 2: I think you're getting too caught up in the fact that he was going to take op fishing in a "sexist" way, I think op probably just wanted to spend time with her dad no matter what they did, but he ditched her and that broke her heart.
That's what I was feeling as well. Like seriously...move on Rslash.
Yeah i liked fishing as a child and as an adult. Whether OP likes fishing or not, she likely appreciated the thought, if he went through with it, that it was an isolated hobby where they could bond. However he flaked
Rslash took that a little too seriously but he DID have a point. Dad's like him can be like that. They barely even know anything about their kids and the only time they do a half-assed good thing for their child it's something that THEY like, not something their kid likes. Cause Dad's like that are selfish af.
@@truthseeker9249 I agree with his point completely, I'm just saying I think rslash focused a little more on the depth of the issue than what could be simply just a child that wants to have a parent's undivided attention. I try to make it a point to do everything with my daughter and even started teaching her how to fish when she showed an inkling of interest
@@calex197 yeah I know. I really want our kids to take up activities where they're active. I really want them to either dance or take up sports. And regardless they're all going to learn how to fight. They need to have at least somewhat of a healthy weight and they need to be able to handle themselves in combat. I was bullied in school but was lucky enough to never be hit. If someone tried to fight me I would have been vaporized. I don't want that to happem to them. Maybe I'll teach them to fish if we ever live next to a lake. Catching your own food feels good.
*First OP:* It's wild that OP and her brother crossed paths by chance like that. I'm glad her brother's doing better, and that they could reunite. I hope their dad reaches out, too.
*Second OP:* "How can you give me away when you gave me away 20 years ago?" Mic. Effin'. Drop. OP was NTA. I'm surprised she even invited her dad to her wedding, considering he didn't invite her to his.
*Third OP:* I'm glad things worked out between OP and his daughter, but I can't get past the part where she was on the couch buck nekkid?! That's just unsanitary! Other people sit there!
Why didn’t she do this in her own room? Along with being unsanitary she was in a more open area where OP could’ve walked in on her.
She didn't go to her own room because she didn't have a TV there. But yes, agreed it's super gross, but 15 year olds aren't always super smart!
I have a similar situation to 2nd OP, my dad never invited me to his, I never invited him to mine. It seems like a fair trade
@@errantwinds-up8uuPhones exists, but yeah the thinking wasn’t there this time 😂
I completely skipped over that fact. He did exclude OP from the wedding but OP invited him to here
Who says " you aren't my child anymore"? Ever. In any circumstance. That mom is respilonsible for everything that happened to that guy.
Story 3: That has got to be one of the most embarrassing things I've ever heard. Like, you can hardly recover from that.
I hope that eventually, this moment is forgotten
It will never be forgotten because the human mind will bring this moment up forever
That last story, damn that girl is bold. Splayed out on the living room couch, theres no hiding anything there.
Lessons learned, you ALWAYS need to have an escape plan.
"How could the child I abandoned not want me to walk her down the isle at her wedding?"
This isn't just stupid. It's advanced stupid.
He's got a PhD in stupid
Story 1: Parents who ditch their kids and act like they don't care just to then look all panicked when it becomes serious. I abhorre these devils, I wish nothing but chaos on them and their lives.
Don't make kids if you can't handle parenthood.
Story 2 : Thing is, he wasn't a father so he has no rights to have the "daughter" wedding thing. He'll have the chance to do that with his new kids.
I’m betting with story two OPs “dad” hopes that walking her down the aisle will cover all his neglect towards her. Plus I bet his stepdaughter will have her biodad walk her down the aisle. He wants the moments that serve him without putting in the effort.
@@lorilancaster5917He never once said anything about supporting OP
@@nationalinstituteofcheese3012 and neither did I. I’m confused by your statement
Story 2: Op should've said "Sorry, you're bitter and that would ruin the ceromony"
That was my thought as well
Story 2: "he already gave me away 20 years ago". This sums it up pretty well. RSlash's reading and reaction was also nice to hear.
Story 2: The moment you abandoned and neglected your daughter, thats when you lost your rights as a father. Sure, you paid child support, but that doesn't matter! You were never there for your daughter and now when OP wants Lenny to walk her down the aisle, he thinks he can just slide into OP'S life like nothing happened? Gimme a break!
And the fact that OP made it clear that paying child support was the only thing he he and the only fact he knows about her was golden!
“..Master the art of stealth wanking”- Rslash 2023
It's funny, I didn't think Americans really used that word.
Less stealth wanking and more like _discreet_ wanking. If a person chooses to drop their pants to pleasure themselves in a common living area instead of the privacy of their own bedroom, the blame is on them if someone stumbles onto them & their one-person show.
We need that on a t-shirt
@@ManlyStump We don’t, or at least I’ve never heard it used seriously.
@@laurenstewart5707It's definitely not an American word but it is occasionally in use for shits and giggles
The first couple words of story1: his older brother Rex who ran away from home years ago
Ha, Speed Racer.
She always says "don't play ball in the house".
The second story is not over by any stretch. She'll probably update in a few years after her first child is born when the bio dad inevitably tries to sue for grandparent's rights.
Or if she names the child after her mom or Lenny and not him or the garden implement he married.
@@lorilancaster5917😂 garden implement
Come on man, don't compare her to that kind of hoe. That's the tool used for tilling soil.
Rslash, as a woman I gotta tell you that fishing is a fun thing for a 6 year old girl. Its more common than you think
Lenny isn't the step father, he's the father who stepped up.
In The Last Story it should be the secret art of petting the cat.
Story 2:
Bio dad: "I didn't pay child support for you to grow up and be a spoiled brat."
You're right. You didn't pay child support for that reason. You paid child support because it was your legal obligation. You can't use that to guilt the biological daughter of whom you neglected and abandoned.
Along with needing more good endings like the first story of siblings reuniting? Second story, OP deserves a gold medal for how she handled her sperm donor. She basically bulls-eyed all the right spots like a pro.
Story 2: At that point, it doesn't even matter if OP liked fishing or not. She was still holding out hope that she would get to spend time with her deadbeat dad, so if it meant that she had to tolerate fishing to spend time with him, I'm sure 6 year old OP would put up with it because a child's need for parental attention at that age is incredibly strong.
Stepmom: “WhAt YoU sAiD bRoKe YoUr DaD!”
Rslash: “OH bohoo!”
Me: “Dabney, you are my hero!”🤣
Story 2: It's not about the fishing...it was about spending time with her dad. She didn't care if it was fishing or hiking or just sitting on the couch watching tv. She just wanted to spend time with her dad. He showed her that he didn't have time for her.
Story two is actually heartwarming. OP has a real father to walk her down the aisle, and no better way to show him how she feels. That says "I love you" more than all the words in the world. That being said, my very abusive and neglectful father took me fishing once and it remains one of my few happy memories of the man. What OP wanted was simple contact and affirmation. It was her stepdad who gave her that, and she has rewarded him for that.
Congratulations, kid, on a job well done.
I can relate to the first story. After my aunt divorced my uncle, i still stayed in contact with her for years cause she had been my aunt since i was very little and i've always loved her dearly. When i was in my mid teens, we lost contact. I spent years looking for her but was unsuccessful. Just last week, she found me! After 15 years! I had literally just been talking about her a few days prior about how much i missed her. I never thought she would be the one to find me since i changed my first and last name after i got married and i have very little social media activity, just facebook and i don't really post anything other than funny memes here and there. She found me and messaged me and then we spoke on the phone for over an hour. It was a very emotional phone call. Life has a way of bringing people back into your world, you just have to pay attention and never give up hope.
Rslash, not to put you on blast, but I am a girl who enjoys fishing!😂 I used to love going fishing with my dad and he is the one who taught me how to fish. it's actually funny because when my husband and I were dating, he invited me on an employee's day at his country club job to go fishing. And being the man he is, try to impress me with his fishing skills. By the end of the day, I was actually the one with teaching him how to fish. I caught three fish that day and he caught none. It's a fun story I like to tell now that we are married. I would still love to go fishing with my dad, but he has become quite the homebody in his old age. I hope to Bring him out to go fishing someday.
Second story: coming from a divorced family myself...child support is literally the bare minimum a parent can provide. If you put in only the bare minimum, expect to get that back. That's exactly what this sperm donor is getting here (actually more tbh).
Second story: Don’t feel bad OP! I’m planning on doing the exact same thing with my stepdad and my bio dad. My REAL dad (stepdad ) will be walking me down the aisle at my wedding so if my bio dad has an issue he’s just gonna have to deal with it. Congrats OP🎉
"How could you give me away when you already did that 20 years ago, Dad?!"
**
Wow, OP’s dad in story 2 has *balls* thinking he can walk his daughter down the aisle after not even letting her go to *his* second wedding cuz she didn’t respect the woman he cheated on her mother with.
Good morning Guys. I really needed to hear RSlash today. My boyfriend left for college and it was a tearful goodbye. I hope everyone is having a good day.
OMG! The last story reminds me of the time my twin and I walked in on my brother doing the same thing!!!! We didn't talk to him for 2 months!!! When he would walk into any room we were in we would immediately look at anything other than him. That kind of embarrassment runs deep, and that awkward feeling never really leaves you lmao
Don't forget that kids graduate elementary school at 10/11 not 6, but other than that, Rslash is right. On the other hand, my favorite hobbies with my dad before he died were all "dad" hobbies, but I loved it because I was spending time with him. Things like seeing high school baseball games, golfing, and playing computer war games. Kids don't really care about the activities they're doing so much as they care about the people they do them with -- especially when it comes to parents. But, considering everything else, I have to admit, I don't think the dad in this second story was thinking of his daughter when he said he'd take her out fishing as a reward.
Walking his daughter down the aisle is not a right its a priviledge, A priveledge OPs "dad " has not earned but Lenny has.
Story 1 its was destined for them to reunite. Glad their back together.
second story hits home hard. my dad, is and always has been, aloof with me. i'm just eh with him now. i got married 3 and a half years ago. my younger brother walked me down the aisle. i have 4 brothers (they're not his kids) and they've been more fatherly than he has. there's a wedding picture of my brother walking me down the aisle and you see the regret in my dad's face behind us.
good.
Well this sting will be forever with him for the rest of his life. I hope you have a great life with your brothers
Wow!! “You already gave me away 20 years ago” 💥 It’s incredibly ironic how the sperm donor’s excuse for not having his 6 year old daughter at his wedding was because he assumed she would be bitter. (Probably step-monster’s idea) Yet she INVITED him to her wedding and he was bitter over it and had a fit AND cried to OP’s mom and his wife. What a POS.
"Oh, Boo-Hoo."
Rslash is done with these parents.
That last story... Man my father caught me *busy* one time while I was looking at my laptop, he didn't even leave the room or apologize, I had to quickly drag my jeans back up.
He started telling everyone, even literal strangers who knock on the door to talk about voting or whatever that I was an... adult video addict, and he'd randomly bring it up for no good reason.
I was watching a video about videogame easter eggs, I was just *busy* because I was bored and I'd just recently woken up. Thankfully most people he talked to was like "well that's none of my business", but yeesh, I wish my father was as understanding as that girl's parent.
2nd Story: Does anyone else remember the story where the stepdaughter chose her deadbeat biodad over her stepfather?
This feels like a mirrored version of that.
Yeah and if it’s the story I remembered, OP paid this girl’s college, car, etc and wasn’t even married to the mom.
Story 2: I had the same type of DNA donor(only difference was that he didn't bother to get to know me but would show up to milestones events of my life like he added any contribution to it & played the proud father for a couple of hours).
When I got married he randomly threw out how he didn't have money, that I didn't even ask for, as I was trying to invite him. He choose to not be at my wedding because he didn't want to pay for his own hotel room. Yes he could afford it, he just never wanted to spend money if he thought he could avoid it.
So I get that OP loves her dad, I loved mines too even though he wasn't there, but there comes a point where we have to recognize that these "fathers" just never wanted to be a dad.
Story2 You're never the ahole for choosing the person who cares for you over the person who ignored and abandoned you. Period. Blood is nothing if it isn't respected by both parties.
I was kind of in the same situation as that girl in the last story, once. I had a bunch of friends over for New Years, when I was sixteen. The only other person in the house at the time was my 8 year old little brother, who was already in bed. Now, the kitchen was open air into the living room, but it had a wall between it and the bedrooms and bathroom. That wall opened into the laundry room that had a door to the garage. My little brother was known for sleeping through the night, and if he needed water, we always went to the bathroom. My parents weren't supposed to be home until well after midnight. So, my friends and I sat in the kitchen to play Spin the Bottle Truth or Dare. And because we were all very, very gay and very open about that fact, it eventually got to the point where most of us were topless or completely butt naked. Well, my, at the time, stepfather came home unexpectedly and walked in on a bunch of half-naked girls. We made a mad dash for my room, there was a lot of nervous giggling, my little brother had apparently woken up in the commotion. And former stepfather got angry with me, yelling about "what if your brother saw you" which I had accounted for, thus why we were in the kitchen and not the living room, and how irresponsible I was being to have fun with my friends. He mentioned that he was going to call my mother, so I called her first to explain. And she took my side. I was a teenager with my friends over, I'd made sure my little brother was asleep and couldn't see us in the middle of the night. Was what I did the smartest thing in the world? Probably not, but I had every reason to think that no one would walk in on us, and we would be ok. Mom would later tell me that she didn't think he was actually mad at me because of my brother or whatever, but because there was a group of half naked girls and he couldn't pursue them (he'd been known to make very uncomfortable comments about my friends in the past).
I was lucky that my mom was on my side about this. We still use it as an example of "Teens will be teens", to this day because hey, it's funny as hell, in retrospect.
Omfg, I have a 9 year old son and while he thinks he's a 13 year old he's very much still a little kid and a mama's boy. I'm like sick to my stomach with that story and how the mom made it that bad
I'm a woman and I freaking love fishing. There's something about that tug on the line and wrestling the fish into the boat. My dad always promised me and my siblings he'd take us fishing and teach us, but he never came through. It took us visiting my uncle who lived on a lake in Wisconsin to get to learn. It was SO FUN. My older brother was too grossed out by the worms to handle them, but I'd bait his hook for him and then he'd be fine. (I'm fine with worms but I can't stand spiders. My brother is the spider killer for us.) Our uncle let us borrow his boats and use them on his lake, as well as his fishing equipment. Did me and my sisters scream and flail at every dragonfly that tried to land on us? Yes. Did we get grossed out by my uncle telling us stories of fish that live so deep down in the lake that they barf up their insides when caught and hauled up to the surface? Also yes. Did my brother creep us out with his stories of potential monsters living in the lake beneath us? Yes. But did we catch a bunch of bass and have an amazing time? Absolutely! Long story short - If there's something you like doing and you want to share it with your daughter, do it! Every girl is different. Maybe she'll like it, maybe she won't. I wish with all of my heart that my dad had cared enough about me to want to spend actual time with me.
My daughter's loved fishing at 6. It mostly stems around getting to do stuff together. I'm working with a neighbor currently in fixing up an old boat that will allow us to go out and do some deep lake fishing. My girls are 11 and 8 now, but i know they will likely still want to come, even just for the time together.
The last story: 😳 Thank the goddess that neither I or their father have never walked in on either of my daughters when they were living with us before going to college, because we wouldn’t know what to do or say.
I’m glad that things have worked out for op and his daughter.
Yes, definitely tease her years from now when it will be less mortifying for both of you.
Last story- if my own experiences are anything to judge by, then the daughter is going to always relive the moment he caught her when she closes her eyes just before sleep.
2nd story. That baby girl needs to cut all contact with her "dad". I did that at age 13 when I realized my dad didn't give a shit about me. He also wasn't told I was getting married when I got married. I had my grandfather walk me down the isle since he's been my dad my whole life.
The quote that best describes Lenny is “He's not the stepdad, he's the dad that stepped up.”
Story 2 sounds a lot like my bio-father, and the step-dad sounds like my step-dad. My father (bio-dad) didn't give me or my sibling any emotional attention and was always away. He's a nut case now. My dad (step-dad) is my real dad, I want him to walk me down the aisle when I get married. My bio-dad also didn't invite me to his wedding, for reasons that were not true.
First story: what happy yet sweetbitter story. Im glad that op found her brother, i wish things go well with them and see their parents again. As for op's mother, i know you can say things that you don't mean when you are angry but my god beating your kid hard and saying hurtful things over a TV was too much. I hope her brother talks back to his parents
Step dad vs Bio dad: I was so glad when OP laid her sperm donor out in that message. Up to that point I was sitting here talking to my computer monitor like "Tell him how you really feel about him neglecting you!" and she finally did and it was glorious. Sperm donor seriously thought he was going to get to play at appearances and walk his daughter down the aisle when he didn't walk with her anywhere her whole life. Lenny is the real MVP here. I'm sure he saw all of this and vowed he was going to show OP the love she deserved growing up. He's a good man.
Last story: I giggled when OP said he was getting his daughter her own tv and deep cleaning the couch because I was thinking to myself "now is a good time to get her a tv or a phone so she watch her videos in private". Yet again another good man. He didn't embarrass his daughter, didn't act as if what she was doing was unnatural, he just tried to make the situation less uncomfortable so they could resume their father-daughter relationship.
My father is just like the father in the second story. He only wanted to be a parent when it benefited him, treated it like work when it didn't, and was ALWAYS the victim no matter what when we had a problem with him.
Only thing I'll say about fishing is, as a six year old tomboy girl I had to beg my dad to take me fishing because he didn't like it. But I really wanted to learn how to fish. So starting at around age six we went out to get a fishing license and had several Daddy daughter fishing dates but I had to ask for it every time. To be fair, I couldn't handle prepping the fish to eat but I still loved cooking it over the fire and spending time with my Dad.
So while it's not as likely girls want to fish I'd say that's still a pretty unfair assumption that she didn't want to.
Edit: Also I would have thrown a temper tantrum if someone forced me to go to a princess party. I've since grown out of hating anything girly. I know now that was very immature of me to look down on that stuff. But yeah, most of the girls and guys I hung out with up until high school were of a similar mindset.
"He already gave me away 20 years ago" Ooooo I felt that burning sting, Imagine the emotional damage it would cause if she said that to his face. Never gonna recover from that
Fatherhood is more than a sperm donation and child support.
I’m a father who was divorced and had two young kids who were my shining stars. Every decision I made after divorce was with my kids emotional health in mind. I coached their teams, went to school conferences, plays, recitals etc. I bought a home in the same school area so my kids could come home from school just like they did at the ex’s house. They were and are more important than any other relationship I ever had. I’m now retired, living with my son and his beautiful wife and kids on their farm. Where they built a barn with an apartment with a apartment for grandpa to live in. Just steps away from the house. I have grandkids over for storytelling and snacks, and home cooking when I want. It’s better than Grubhub! Put your kids first and you will never regret it. I’m the wealthiest man I know.
I don't think there's a society where a girl wouldn't be mortified if her dad caught her in that situation
Never had a negative experience with a guy named Lenny. They're always down to earth, happy people who can rock badass moustaches.
for story 2, the bio dad paid child support to stay out of jail and meet his legal obligations, not because he was owed anything. the entitlement is strong with this one
Rslash Ive literally seen girls enjoy fishing with their fathers and brothers...one girl had this pink princess pole, was about 5 and was able to untangle her own rod. Had a brother and sister 14 and 12(they told us) at the park need my husbands help, both were having fun fishing, also both very polite. Just the other day a girl was proudly carrying out a new fishing pole from the store, was under 13. You would be suprised at how many girls like fishing. I also occasionally fish with my husband, though im bad at it 🤣
She "still has to master the art of stealth wanking." That is hilarious!
man, my heart really goes out to op in the second story. imo having a parent who doesn't even acknowledge you despite you trying to form a bond with them is one of the worst feelings. my bio-dad married a woman who had kids already and pretty much forgot I existed except when he wanted something or if it was my birthday. no matter what I did, I couldn't get him to spend time with me without his step-kids. he would take me fishing or to a monster jam rally or to a stock car racing event, and it was always a ruined experience because he'd bring one or both of his step-kids with him, sometimes even bring his wife, and he'd pretty much focus on them instead of me. it sucked because there was a time where he was a decent dad, when he actually tried to bond with me, and that was when I was really little and we'd watch WWE together.
2nd story: wanna bet 100% of the bio-father's family never got the full story? Only the whiney: "My awful, ungrateful, bi*** of a daughter won't let me walk her down the aisle!" and they, like trashy flying monkeys are programmed to do, swarmed her.
100% of the times I've gone fishing were with my grandfather. I never really cared for fishing, I just wanted to spend time with him and make him proud. I was always excited to go. The fact he father couldn't even keep that promise.... heartbreaking
That first story is quite painful, thinking what the mother said "in the heat of the moment."
I recall a memory as a child where something similar was said to me, but the outcomes were different thankfully. My mother hit her head on the car trunk door as I was trying to close it, I think it was a side door or something. She fell to the ground screaming, that she broke her skull, that she will die, that I killed her, that I will be without a mother. Obviously a little kid like me also started crying. Miraculously in that parking lot a woman walking by overheard us, and ran over to help. This stranger woman comforted me by saying that people say things they don't mean when they are angry, and that my mom still loves me very much. Then she helped my mom. Everything was actually okay, because my mom wasn't even seriously hurt, she just is REALLY afraid of pain, and I learned in my life she throws fits every time she hurts herself just out of fear of the pain. But if that woman didn't tell me what I needed to hear in that moment, I would have truly believed I killed my mom with how she was screaming. So i guess I didn't run away like the poor brother did in the first story. I'm very happy he reunited with his sister.
Second Story: I totally relate to OP, I'm sadly the affair child so our situations are reversed, I'm getting married probably around April next year, we haven't set the date yet, but I'm not planning on having my bio dad attend the wedding. I was his first child, granted, an affair baby, but it is not my fault I was born, but he always played favorites when his ""real"" kids were born, his wife forgave him btw. He payed for the collegue of his others kids but not mine, he rarely visits me or calls me at all, so I don't feel like inviting him. I'm having my grandfather walking me, he deserves it way more.
Story 2: Man is lucky he even got an invite tbh, it was a courtesy that OP was never afforded. Also for the last story, it's highly likely that OP's daughter was dying of embarrassment and didn't know how to handle the aftermath so avoiding OP would have been the easiest option for her.
Story 2: NTA. He lost that right the moment he started to ignore and abandon OP when she was a kid. Lenny is the real MVP here. Even though Lenny is OP's stepdad, he was there for OP when she needed a father while here biological dad was only there to sign child support checks.
Last story: Let me correct OP in one thing, because his daughter did ONE thing wrong: doing that ON THE LIVING ROOM, without thinking she could've been caught and how to handle it if it happened, which it did.
Like, you have your room and a lock in you door for a reason girl, to avoid this type of awkward and embarissing situations. Nothing wrong with wanting to watch adult stuff, but usually people do these on private for a reason, particularly when the person that might catch you is a parent, which makes it 10 times more awkward and embarassing.
Father vs stepdad story: It takes more than genetics to be a dad. OP's dad is Lenny, the man that helped raise her, guided her thru her life and was there for her big events. Maybe (doubtfully) this served as a wakeup call with his stepchildren and OP's half-sibling(s?).
RSLASH, as far as the fishing trip goes, it doesn't matter if OP liked fishing as a child, she just wanted to spend time with her father. Fishing with just the two of them COULD have made for a great memory and he chose to blow it. And you don't graduate elementary school at 6, that's kindergarten/1st grade age.
You know that bit in the 2nd story was crazy when r/slash "oh shit!" Uncensored lol
I can name 3 guys off the top of my head who regularly go fishing with their daughters, and they all enjoy it. Matter of fact they've kind of ruined ice fishing for one because it used to be his time to get away from the world when he was single, now his kids bug him every winter weekend lol
rSlash, I am a female and grew up fishing, as did my older sister. Our dad was (and still is) a boat captain and avid fishermen. We’d go catch fish, and dad would clean and cook them for us. We called them fish bites, since it was tiny pieces of fish, fried, and served. I still love fishing as an adult. We celebrated me getting out of the hospital by going fishing during my high school years. If OP was anything like me, that would be SO heartbreaking.
It's possible also that OP asked to go fishing with her dad because she knew he liked fishing and she only wanted to spend time with him. I did that with my dad and hunting. I don't like hunting but I love my dad.
To the OP who's Dad wanted to walk her down the aisle and was acting like a butthead about it : Tell him he can walk you down the aisle, just like he took you fishing after you elemtary school graduation fishing trip. When one happens, the other will. *Mic Drop*
Its honestly amazing how consistently phrases like "I don't wanna sound sexist" is immediately followed by a statement that's the opposite.
Oof, that last story, I can only imagine the embarrassment on both sides. This is why I'm going to be very active in making sure my kid knows they have the privacy of their own room, and that I will ALWAYS knock. I love my kid, but there are some things I don't wanna be a witness to, including any private fun time.
Daughter of a fisherman here! Daddy's girl too! If you have a daddy's girl, Dabney, she's going to want to do most of the things you do. So if you like video games, she will want to do video games, if you like fishing, take her fishing. If you like sports, she will join the ones you play.
Do not, for a single moment, let traditional gender roles stop you from teaching your daughter anything and everything. Changing a tire, checking her oil, how to unclog a drain, how to change a light bulb, how to balance a checkbook, laundry, fishing, cutting the lawn, pulling weeds.
She will need to learn how to care for a house just the same as anyone else, and there's nothing wrong with preparing her by giving her all the tools and knowledge she needs to learn everything she has to do so she doesn't have to depend on someone else.
8:02 to quote one of the greatest parents in the galaxy "he might have been your father but he wasn't your daddy"
As someone with a great stepdad and a neglectful bio dad, I really felt that second story.
last story, daughter needs to learn to use a phone and earphones like a regular person 😂 rolled and failed the stealth check
Imagine losing your son, one of only 2 childen you had, a kid/prepubesant teenager, over a TV. Imagine never getting to see your kid for years afterwards, not knowing he was dead or alive or even have a safe place to sleep each night, over a TV. I wonder how much guilt the Mom in first story is feeling, but I also know that its not enough to repay how she acted to make her son run away and never look back
As a stepchild myself, I was rooting for OP in the second story! My father was just like her father and I can't tell you how hard it was to endure the broken promises and constant heartbreaks. My father stopped talking to me in 2016 because apparently I didn't have the appropriate reaction and that I should be scared for my family and myself( We're Mexican but our family has been here since Texas' independence from Mexico). Hes liberal but he doesn't vote and doesn't like listening to others opinion. I don't know where that deadbeat is but I am perfectly happy with my stepdad because he was everything a teenager desperately needed in a parental figure.