r/Trueoffmychest My GF Cheated with a YouTuber
Vložit
- čas přidán 9. 07. 2024
- Podcast: open.spotify.com/show/3hJo9o8...
Patreon: / rslash
Discord: / discord
0:00 Intro
0:08 Celebrity crush
1:57 Comment story
2:38 Divorce
5:59 I ruined a wedding
9:46 Blindsided
11:59 Threesome
14:17 The plan
"Sneaky Snitch" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) License: CC By Attribution 3.0 - Komedie
*Cheating Cousin:* Hey Op, wanna be the best man at my wedding?
*Narrator:* And then OP got an idea. An awful idea. A wonderful, awful idea...
Heh heh!! My thoughts as well!! *que the Grinchy evil grin*!!! 😂😂😂😂
@@rubyblue444 There are some who say that the couple's egos shrank three sizes that wedding day! 😈
“You’re a mean one Mr. OP…” 😂
The Grinch's devious smile is all I can think about after reading that
@@Hiimreggie Same!! LOL!
How the heck do you cheat with your cousins girl and then ask him to be the best man.... that's way more messed up than ruining their wedding.
in another story, OP's ex GF cheated on him with his brother and since OP was kinda the blacksheep of his family because they were all into sport while he was into archery (and they didn't consider that a real sport somehow, the stuff is in the olympics by the way) they all took his brother's side and he left, they lied to the family about the situation telling OP was the one cheating on her, the brother and the ex got married and all was good for them, OP was no contact.
he was surprised when they contacted him out of the blue to apologise and invite him to thanksgiving
but the rich grandpa found out and told the whole bunch to apologise to OP and bring him to the next thanksgiving or they'd be cut out of the will, he didn't come, they were cut out, the grandpa tried to contact OP to make buddy buddy with him but since grandpa was also an asshole in his own way, OP flipped him off too.
so maybe someone found out and pressured them into making peace with OP or being cut out ...
Because it makes for a more clickable story when you make ship up on reddit.
I mean, you could obviously... I'm just baffled how he didn't see it coming that he himself singlehandedly ruined his wedding day by doing so! 😂
Not condoning it but...
Where I grew up this cousin would have had a shotgun wedding. But not the traditional kind.
Perhaps. But we do live in a culture saturated with "love conquers all' and "true love is the most important thing" and "there's always a happy ending and everyone will make nice" because of BS romcoms. The reality of how they hurt OP isn't real to people high on "...and love won out..."@@yozarahirvi4750
I love how Maya saw this coming and played the Uno reverse card on the awful boyfriend.
I didn't really get what was awful with the boyfriend ? Was it that he was trying to push for a threesome ?
When i was watching this vid I went "At least if something goes wrong in the relationship, you know who to turn to." If I was Bi, I know I would.
@@SproutiusShrubiusthe16th bi doesn’t equal you wanna date every person, but i get your point
@@lpsfoxstar8454 Bi, meaning I would date her. I am female-
@@lpsfoxstar8454they never said that… bisexual means liking men and women, the other person who commented is a female…/lh
the fact maya cared more about ops feelings / well-being then her bf should be an immediate red flag to op.
Honestly Maya sounds amazing, she did things exactly how you should to make sure someone's comfortable with new intimate things, made it as comfortable as she could and took every step to ease her friend into it, no selfishness whatsoever
Story 2: if he wanted a “traditional wife” then he should’ve married a traditional wife, but instead all he’s done is pushed his family away, pushed away his wife and her love, started verbally abusing her, tried breaking down her self esteem… it’s little wonder OP wants a divorce, and I hope she gets a speedy divorce without issue.
Honestly I would never be a submissive partner I have a short temper and and being a « traditional woman » triggered this short temper
Traditional wife here! We exist, but no, we don't care how you live your life. If the husband realized he's not fulfilled by a non traditional wife, he should have talked to her. Not berated her for not living up to his changing expectations. She has every right to not be on board. Therefore, parting ways may be for the best. I'm biased in the fact that traditional roles make my marriage and family so happy. That's why some women are so eager for everyone to want this lifestyle.
I'm sure everyone agrees there is nothing wrong with a woman who chooses to be a traditional wife. However, trying to change a partner to be "ideal" in their eyes is wrong.
This story is super sad. Her former sweet loving husband is already with another woman, which I feel he might have been doing this to get her to divorce him. He might regret it later on but that's his own grave to dig.
People have no idea what traditional means. My great-grandparents were traditional. They both worked from dawn to dusk, in the fields. The man did the more physically demanding stuff, like plowing, harvesting, digging and the woman did the finicky, time consuming stuff, like picking the weeds, or stringing up peppers to dry. Yes, the woman did cook, until the kids were old enough to take that stuff over (i.e. they were 9 yrs old). By 9, all kids were fully autonomous and by that age, they would have to be a net contributor to the household.
People get their ideas about traditional marriage form 1950s advertisements of the American dream, basically, when the USA was comparatively so insanely rich that they could live off of barely any work, because every other economy was demolished in WW2. That pretty much never happened anywhere else on Earth at any time in history.
This story was upsetting, in that it appears that the butthole got what they wanted, albeit with another woman. I'm hoping that since he couldn't afford to sole-support his prior family, that along with his child support payments his new one fails - although that's a bit sad for the new wife, who sounds relatively innocent (allegedly post separation).
Second to last story... wow... Maya wrecked that relationship in the sweetest way possible. OP found out that it's possible to be treated well in bed, and realized that her former BF was ... not the best. I think that's the most positive 3some story I've ever heard.
Maya sounds like a absolutely incredible partner I wish her all the best
Story 3: The cousin and the ex are absolutely horrible for sure, but can we talk about OP’s MOTHER in this? She has the gall to be mad at OP, defends the cousin despite what he did to OP? If your own mom defends someone who had s*x with your girlfriend and tries to justify it, you know she absolutely failed as a mother.
I'm more surprised that the cousin didn't see this coming miles away. He knew full well how OP felt about them both, how OP hadn't wanted to repair their relationship over time. The cousin even got an earful when he asked OP to be best man.
Had sex with, and then dated and married. I'm sure most of the family knew OP was with the bride.
@@annika5893 The cousin is clearly a moron. Who would ask their fiance's ex to be their best man even without the cheating!?
agreed on both counts.
I'm pretty sure its also because the mother receives some backlash from the people on the cousin's side at the wedding.
Last story: That was both sweet and sad at the same time. She thankfully had her family ready with open arms since they knew one day he was gonna kick her out. It's nice she didn't have to worry about trying to get the baby stuff back. But that guy is the bottom of bottom scum.
If you don’t want someone to ruin your wedding, maybe don’t make the person you cheated on your best man. Because you deserve to have your wedding ruined.
You deserve a lot worse but no need to go to jail
They are both in the wrong. op shouldve moved on and cut those people out of his life but because he didnt go to therapy or attempted to heal in any way he hurt more people then he realized. now his family is mad at him and there is so much drama which couldve been avoided and the crazist part is op stated that he didnt know that his "revenge" made him feel better. so becuase of his hatred most of his family is resentful to op.
Revegene is a fools game and at the end both players lose
@@ImNotEXVYthey all talked as if they did nothing bad towards OP and they kept insisting when OP said no. He wanted to go no contact with them but they were the pushy ones…
@ImenvyyCodm he had cut them out of his life. They're the one who contacted him out of the blue after three years of him not talking them. I don't know how they possibly thought op wouldn't have done anything bad at the wedding.
@@ImNotEXVY OP did cut them off, but then his dumbass cousin thought it’d be a good idea to make the person he stabbed in the back his best man. They brought what OP did on themselves. A wedding built on betrayal isn’t sacred.
Can I just point out that “traditional house wives” from all those vintage sitcoms, namely Leave it to Beaver, were dressed in pretty dresses with high heels and pearls while cooking and cleaning because the actresses were told to by the people in charge of the shows, they most definitely would not have dressed that way while cooking and cleaning in their own homes.
Threesome story: I admire Maya for how she handled this. It was obvious OP’s ex was aiming to probably have some dominant alpha male passionate hugging session to inflate his ego. Maya redirect his plans into a mutually beneficial night. I’ve personally experienced that but not as gently as it sounds like it went in OP’s story
To be honest this was the best way for this story to end. And I bet maya has experienced this a lot of times and does this on purpose so that guys will not assume a threesome becomes all about them
Honestly, Maya is such a queen. I hope OP stays friends with her, need a good friend like that.
Sorry that you had a poor experience, sending good vibes your way
I would totally do something like that in a polycule if i knew it wasnt my friends type of thing :3
Eff weird ego trip ideas
I don't know exactly what he had in mind, but I know it didn't go as he intended, and I'm sure that if it went like he intended it to go both women would have been disappointed. I mean, in hindsight it was revealed he wasn't good in bed, what makes him think he can please two women when he can't even please one?
The story is so funny, it made me laugh. Maya is a good friend.
There is update to third story:
- OP had still disagrement what he do with his mother.
- Some family members paid for his therapy, he was diagnosed with PTSD, caused by the discovery of the affair.
- In newer update he learned he is Bi but was dumped, when he thought he has a good connection with a dude.
PTSD yeah sure. This isn’t PTSD for sure.
Stop using PTSD for anything please.
@@Thecommentator-hc1fz funny how everything on the internet gets turned into an argument, even about people not inaide the argument itself
@@Thecommentator-hc1fzWell thank fuck you’re here to argue with a clinical diagnosis.
@@Thecommentator-hc1fz Sure, but I'd like to see your medical school degree first.
@@foxxyytofficial Not everything turns into an argument! How dare you!
j/k btw
If you have a “traditional” household the husband is supposed to take care of his wife. He is supposed to lift her up, provide her emotional and physical needs. He works longer hours if need be so she can afford to run the household smoothly like she would at a job outside of the home. No woman who desires to stay at home should allow the “leader” of the household to be a spineless weakling who would idolize other women and tear down his wife. Whoever you marry and whatever kind of relationship you have, you’re supposed to love and support your partner like they’re your best friend. If one of the people decide they want to fantasize about someone else and verbally shame you then that relationship should end there. He wanted a doormat. Let him have one, it’s of no real loss to you.
exactly!! A lot of men who aren't traditional think they are owed a traditional woman,like no boo,that's NOT how it works 😂 a Lot of men want to idolize other women and have a traditional woman at the same time. The NERVE
Yup. There's nothing wrong with wanting a traditional lifestyle, but people forget to hold themselves to those standards of a traditional life
Story 2: I remember when I saw this on Reddit, I was so mad. The man really screwed his entire life for TikTok, I swear. Some people really just blow up their entire lives for a fantasy that they neither have the means nor the desire to make come true in reality.
How is this a fantasy when it was a normal mariage a few decades ago ?
That's the thing with red pilling; it convinces these dudes that this lifestyle is the One True Path™, the most natural way to live, so the men with poorer critical thinking skills seem to think everything will fall in place by itself, since it's "the way things are supposed to be."
@@InitialDraal It's a fantasy now because it's not attainable with how things are today. A few decades ago it was manageable, a family of five could survive on a single paycheck, try to compare back then to now.
@@InitialDraalbecause in this economy people can't afford to live on a single income. Plus women now have the ability to not have to put up with pathetic men
@@InitialDraal It was "normal" because women weren't given much of a choice back then.
This is ridiculous. Why are you in a motel? She should have been kicked out! She should be in the motel! Why should she be rewarded for cheating?
100% agree unless it's her name on the lease
@Fireguy97 Maybe he needs space from her
Depending on the situation, it can be easier to leave, than to remove the other person.
@@coppercorn I was thinking that too.
@@coppercornme personally I wouldn’t care what’s easier. I’m not leaving my home for a partner that cheats
That last story: Yes, OP, your mom is proud of you. And I'm so glad your sister is safe and your nephew is safe, happy, and healthy.
The "Free Card" celebrity thing is supposed to be a fun little joke between partners. A JOKE! Not a condition for a relationship! What the eff is wrong with this girl? Cheating is cheating, no matter how famous or pretty the celebrity is
Not too mention it was with some no-name CZcams musician. She didn't even get a good story to tell in the future.
how is that a joke? i would take it seriously. op should have taken seriously. imo his gf did not cheat - she had his permission. its fine if hes hurt, thats so valid, his feelings are valid. but she did NOT cheat.
@@QUEERVEEARTwhat an objectively bad take
@QUEERVEEART What permission?, he never said "If you sleep with (x) it's fine", and she wouldn't said that either,because it's supposed to be a joke.
Heck,that's like taking a loan you cannot lay to buy your dream car,without asking your partner, and then say "Well,you cannot get mad,because you knew it's my dream car!"
@@strikeforce1500 she said x is my celebrity exception, he said okay, y is mine. that's permission. exception means the one person you get to sleep with outside of a monogamous relationship. therefore, permission
Everyone has some type of celebrity crush,or idol, but the fact that you'd cheat on your spouse/bf, tells a lot about themselves.. it's disgusting to do.. If you're single,do whatever you want! Don't hurt others!
@@pauliussipavicius4658
They said crush or idol - like someone you idolise or look up to. Not that everyone has an "exception". Don't be so rude, there's no need to be like that. It really is inappropriate and uncalled for and frankly, quite hurtful to some people.
Even then, they agreed with you. They also said that this is unforgivable behaviour and cheating.
Please mind how you interact with others or you could end up as someone's butthole in a reddit story.
@@pauliussipavicius4658 How does having an idol mean you’re a whre? Where is the correlation there? Actually why is being a whre an insult?
@@pauliussipavicius4658 you have nobody famous that you idolize?
Wow, what a sad life you must lead.
@@pauliussipavicius4658 I think you need to polish readings skills better, Pauline.
@@pauliussipavicius4658what you smoking? I might need some of what you got. I’m guessing you either cheated or sleep with a lot of men for money 🤔 🤨
that last one is just so precious... the mother wasn't there to see it, but she was this much help even from beyond the grave
I'm hoping she's resting in peace
Story 4: Polyamory is not for everyone. If OP doesn't want polyamory, then you can't force it. As for if the relationship is over, I imagine that the possibility exists that the GF will still sleep with someone behind OP's back, but that's just a possibility.
Relationship is definitely severely fractured at best and completely wrecked at worst
Poly is a scam. All it is a sad excuse to cheat and be unfaithful to the person you claim you love.
If you love someone you stay faithful. not have another person around as a safety net if things don't work out.
I agree. I had similar thoughts for story one: they should have discussed boundaries better. Whereas here, it's a lot more either or. Either OP is polyamourous or she isn't.
Just me but I'd bail. I'm monogamous and into commitment. So just the fact my significant other seriously wanted it would be a huge, huge red flag. Fantasy is one thing but actually doing it is a totally different creature. I'd help them pack and wish them luck in the new lifestyle.
As a third in a many polyamory relationships, there is a lot of communication, trust, and understanding that is needed.
Also the threesome story, the third absolutely everything right. She knew OP was comfortable and instead of letting them focus on her, which usually happens to the third in a threesome, she focused on OP so she would enjoy it. It also sounds like she learned something about herself and potential praise kinks
The fact that she would even suggest poly means she's a cheating pos. Poly is only a lie cheaters tell themselves to feel better about being a total waste of skin.
The Divorce due to Trad Wife content: As soon as OP started describing what was happening, my thought was "awe crap, he was red pilled." I didn't hit a center bullseye, but I sure got the outer bullseye. I wish OP the best. I would argue that if he wants tradition so much, he should have no problem paying a ton of alimony.
The story with Maya is bittersweet, but I'm glad that things turned out the way they did. Better to be alone than with someone who doesn't respect you and is using you to play out his own fantasies.
She also sounds like an AMAZING Dom and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a bit envious! I hope both OP and Maya are doing good these days.
Honestly, if you cheat with someone's partner then try to force the person (bribing, guilt tripping, etc) to be your best man/bridesmaid or even be part of your wedding, you have to expect some sort of retaliation as payback 😆
Also, Maya sounds so frickin amazing. She made sure OOP was comfortable and set the ex's hopes and dreams for the scenario on fire, its hilarious.
Story 1: for anybody that doesn't know, that Hall Pass / exception thing is a fucking fantasy and nobody expects you to actually be with someone like that. You are expected to not cheat even in the face of your celebrity crush.
She apparently didn't know that. Cheating is cheating no matter who it is
Almost every time a SO brings up opening up the relationship, they're either already cheating, or they have someone in mind.
2nd story: ex-hubby in the second story is going to get a reality check when the women he's aiming for reject him for not being rich enough to sustain both of them. OP should be getting ready to not take him back when he crawls back into her life.
3rd story: AND THEN OP HAD AN IDEA... A TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE, AWFUL IDEA. **Grinch smile**
Seriously, I have no idea what the cousin was thinking. He should've seen that coming.
4th story: she's probably already cheating on OP (even if just emotionally) and just wants a free pass to do it at this point. Dump her.
5th story: That's too bad... Maya seemed like an awesome partner. A way better person for OP to have in her life than that boyfriend.
6th story: That was a very clever plan. OP and her mom are bosses.
Story 3: I just want to know what was going on through the cousin's mind. He really was like "Oh, man! I need a best man and quick! Who to call.... who to call.... I got it! OP!! Sure I ruined his relationship with his ex, but that was three years ago! I'm sure he's moved on by this point!".
I had that celebrity that I would joke with my husband was my “free pass”. I joked about it mostly because I knew it would never happen.
But one night I had a very detailed dream where I developed a connection with this celebrity and came very close to cheating with him before I suddenly remembered that we’re both married.
I woke up crying because I felt SO guilty.
The dream was so detailed that for a day or so the emotional connection this celebrity and I had forged felt almost real.
I told my husband about the dream and apologized, but he just laughed and held me. He thought it was cute that I was so apologetic over a dream.
He, of course, said I had nothing to apologize for, but after that I stopped joking around about “free pass” celebrities.
It just didn’t seem all that funny anymore.
He's a keeper! Hope you'll still be happily together years later.
That ruined wedding sounds more like petty revenge imo.
Petty? Really? I was thinking it’s more like nuclear revenge! He blew up the wedding reception with his stunt. Aired out all the dirty laundry, called them both ugly names, then walked away. Also, he planned and rehearsed his speech! If this isn’t nuclear revenge, it’s at least pro revenge!
@@kristashafer93098 The reason I think it's only petty is because the family didn't turn on the couple. If they did, it would still be revenge but more pro.
Story 1: Look we all have that one celebrity we joke about dropping everything for them, but cheating is still cheating and to casually tell your SO that you slept with another person as if they're supposed to be happy for you is so delusional that I'm surprised you didn't dump her on the spot. And the fact that she was hesitant to tell you at all so she knows what she did was wrong but would still hoping you'd be cool about it because she said that was her free bie. Then when you understandably got mad she tried to turn on the water works as if that's supposed to mean something, you really need to think about how she brought it up and her reaction to your understandable feeling of betrayal.
No, we dont all have.
The water works, the let me explain, you don't understand, etc etc is all apart of the cheating handbook never fall for any of it best if you don't listen at all
@@pauliussipavicius4658 most people do saying all here isn’t literal is just a colloquial term to signify most
He could have said no, I'm not okay with that every time his girlfriend brought up the "exception." What happened is that they discussed some agreement in their relationship, and he didn't take it seriously.
This is why I'm openly polyamorous. We discuss and agree on the terms of our relationship. We both take it seriously when we discuss it. It means we don't need to keep secrets or be ashamed. If we want to do something, we discuss it with our partner, knowing that our partners will take what we say seriously and respond as such. Monogamous people need to learn the value of clear communication and agreeing on terms of the relationship
(Admittedly, not all Monogamous couples are bad at communication. Kink requires it)
@@Mothman1992 we know that value and we clearly communicate we don’t want polyamory that is our preference which we have every right to. To insinuate because we don’t share your preference means we must have something wrong with us is backwards.
Stay at home mom here: I really hate when people get that stupid "my wife should be submissive and pretty all the time" view of traditional roles. The whole point of traditional marriage roles is thst we take care of each other. I take care of the home mostly and he provides financially for all of us. But we are partners who make decisions together not some parody of the 1950s.
What’s so funny about that “traditional housewife” rubbish is that it’s not like the telly shows or movies. My Nana never worked outside the home but my grandfather appreciated everything she did, took her on fabulous vacations, showered her with love and referred to her as The Boss. They married in 1942. I never saw my Nana wearing a dress and jewellery while tending to chores or cooking. She’d dress up for holidays but had her apron on! They, along with my da raised me and I learned so many wonderful things from them. I worked until my husband and I had our children. We wanted to raise our children. Yes, it was tough at times but I feel so blessed that I was able to be a stay at home mum. My husband would take over when he got home to give me some quiet time and always thanked me for his clean underwear and socks. He still thanks me for making his dream come true of owning his own company. I took our kids to school in my robe and pjs 😂! I stayed in the car but it was fabulous not being up at daft o’clock to be dressed with war paint on to just go home and clean. I did start contracting work once our kids were older but always made sure child care was taken care of and meals were prepped before I left. We’re in our 50’s now and that money is OUR fun, travel money! My husband still says to this day that the money he’s made is OUR’s. I adore my husband so much. I married a version of my gramps and da, perfect combo. ❤
@@Sorchia56 That sounds wonderful! I wish there were more shows and such that showed that reality. Thank you for sharing!
I laughed at the mention of Christopher ingle. I went to school with him and he was a massive dudebro frat guy stereotype. He pushed a girl down the stairs in high school for God's sake. The sweet sensitive guy thing is all an act and I'm glad this story shows that.
As a third in many polyamory relationships, there is a lot of communication, trust, and understanding that is needed.
Also, the threesome story, the third absolutely everything right. She knew OP was comfortable, and instead of letting them focus on her, which usually happens to the third in a threesome, she focused on OP so she would enjoy it. It also sounds like she learned something about herself and potential praise kinks
Story 4: OP you are handling it right, she asked you said no you don't have to try it or read any books about it you know you are a monogamous person, I can't stand when someone is peer pressured into doing something with their sexuality because someone else refusing to accept the answer. Now it's time to be completely direct one last conversation, but not to give her a choice because she made her stand clear, the relationship is over and she can be free to live her life however she, but it won't involve forcing you to live a life you don't want.
Why do I feel like the youtuber she slept with is Social Repose aka a known youtube musician who sleeps with his fans and cheats on his girlfriends.
This sounds just like a scenario he's already done.
Idk... There's Jake Munro.
😂 its probably him
There's so many minor musicians (not even just on CZcams) that it really could be anyone honestly
All I'm going to say is that, in a loving relationship between partners, neither should be an "authority figure".
11:35 I think that’s such a great way of putting it. You don’t need to earn your right to say no to something. It’s okay to know something is beyond your comfort or values without researching it
Exactly. Some folks think that people can't say "no" or disagree with something sexual or relationship based if they don't research. It makes no sense, especially if it's something just dropped on them or something their S.O tries pushing them into.
I hope Maya and Op stay friends, Maya sounds like a good person.
That last story was so good. To think that family subtly singlehandedly saved the sister from a lifetime of hurt
It doesn't matter if it was a celebrity or if it was a random in a bar. If you consented to sex from another person while in a relationship it's cheating.
Cheating = end of the relationship. No ands, ifs or buts about it. No exceptions. There might be forgiveness, but the trust is forever gone, and without trust, there can't be a relationship.
I've been reading a lot of cheating stories lately, and the pattern is always the same: the cheater has zero accountability and doesn't care about the consequences of the cheating until they get caught, at which point they go full damage control/emotional manipulation mode, always with the same excuses:
"It was a mistake, a moment of weakness!"
"It was just physical, you're the only one I love!"
"I'm a horrible person, please forgive me!"
"I was unhappy in this relationship and needed this! Please understand!"
"We can fix this! I'll do anything you want, just give me another chance!"
They still don't care about the partner they cheated on, only about the life stability and security they're about to lose. Disgusting.
Celebrity Crush: Girlfriend says OP was on notice about it, but also didn't immediately say anything because she didn't know how OP would react. That means she *knew* OP didn't think she was serious.
Story three he didn't destroy a wedding they destroyed a wedding by screwing eachother behind ops back. They showed their true colours. he decided to Expose them to the rest of the family.
Yes they both deserve the embarrassment. Cause actions have consequences.
Story 4 poly is such a scam and sad excuse to cheat. It's either your faithful or not.
So the guy who wanted a, "traditional wife" basically wanted the character, "June Cleaver" from the 1950/60's TV show, "Leave It to Beaver." That was way before I was born, but I doubt that any housewife would clean their home and cook supper wearing high heels and pearls. But then, my grandparents worked the farm during WWII. There were not many luxuries to go around.
I was thinking Donna Reed but yeah, highly unrealistic that any intelligent woman would desire to be a Stepford Wife.
@@AceMoonshot a bit sexist on your part to think that the role of a tradwife is below an intelligent woman.
Women shouldn't be able to do anything ? Not very feminist of you.
*First OP:* I don't know if anyone suggested it yet, but OP should sleep with _his_ celebrity crush to make things even!
In all seriousness, what his ex did was awful. Even if she warned OP that that particular celeb was her exception, OP didn't have to agree to her terms.
*Second OP:* I guess social media _do_ rot one's brain. Who knew?
I do wonder if OP's ex had those feelings for a while, and his mask slipped at that moment. Either way, OP did the right thing by divorcing him.
*Third OP:* When OP said he came up with a plan, I knew where this was going and was not disappointed. I _am_ disappointed in OP's mom for defending the two cheaters. Also, did OP's cousin _really_ not think OP would retaliate against him and his wife/ OP's ex?
*Fourth OP:* Is it bad that after reading the word "U-haul" I immediately thought "l35bian couple"?
Anyhoo, best of luck to OP.
*Fifth OP:* I'm not surprised by the update. Well, I guess I'm a little surprised that OP didn't pursue Maya. I also doubt Maya would consider a relationship with OP's ex either.
*Sixth OP:* I've read this story before. OP's mom was a clever woman; may she rest in peace. I'm glad OP's sister got out of that environment.
So I'm just going to repost a comment someone made on the first story that *really* opened my eyes on how bad OP's future ex really is: If you're "exception"/hall pass is actually attainable the whole thing goes from a hypothetical to "I would choose this person over you to the extent that I am willing to risk our relationship for just one night with this person".
Ugh of course the husband in the second story fell down the "tradman/manosphere" rabbit hole. Another wanna be alpha ruining his own life.
There is a way to be an alpha and it's easy have firm boundaries that if crossed the person gets tossed out of your life no second chances you have to live for your own happiness and not be a push over nice guy that's being a true alpha not those tick toc Wanna bees
@@chronobretz9511 As much as i despise using the term, I would say being an "alpha" would imply remaining humble and pushing through bad circumstances. Not "all woman are only created to serve their husband and don't deserve any agency in their life" that most man podcasts and trad. wifes shit out these days
Always remember: an alpha is poorly tested, buggy and not fit for public use
@@darko-man8549 we all want that Omega boy. Fully formed submissive and breedable knows what he wants. (This is a joke but also true because Im gay).
@@darko-man8549 Bro your spitting facts
Maya sounds like an absolute angel wtf evertbody needs a friend like that
Everybody jokes about their ex giving them ptsd but catching your spouse cheating DOES cause ptsd. I should know :-/ I hope op heals and cuts off all the toxic people
Story 1: Me and my boyfriend can talk about hot celebrities together (I'm pansexual and he's secure in his heterosexuality so we both talk about both genders). But we have NEVER in our 3 year relationship picked exceptions. Wanna know why? Because celebrity or not we don't want anyone but eachother. Because we actually love eachother. It's completely healthy to think someone else is hot and even to talk about it with your partner, but if you actually want to sleep with someone else then either get in a poly relationship or break up.
My best friend and her boyfriend are both bi, and they both picked the same celebrity exception (Henry Cavill). But it’s so out of the realm of possibility that neither one of them treat it with any sort of seriousness. (She told me once that he said if Henry Cavill showed up and was like “let’s run away together”, she’d be suddenly single and she was like “Totally fair. I’d do the same with Pedro Pascal.”)
I’m queer and I have my exceptions. I get it. Hell, even my straight brother has Jason Statham on his list.
It’s not unhealthy to have celebrity exceptions as a jokey little fantasy and both partners are aware of it.
This bitch just wanted to justify her cheating.
I mean yeah but Ryan Reynolds is Ryan Reynolds. 😂😂😂
Well if you go into the relationship with the understanding the relationship will be poly then yes but if you try to open the relationship then no because that always fails
@@chronobretz9511 It doesn’t have to be poly to have celebrity crushes because they’re not usually serious. I would eat out Natasha Lyonne like I was at a fucking Old Country Buffet, but the opportunity will never exist, and I wouldn’t actively seek it out.
It’s just a bit of fun.
@@chronobretz9511 I mean, not always? Also, you can go into the relationship being monogamous, but open to the idea of poly if the right person(s) come along. Or even be in an otherwise monogamous relationship, but both partners are open to the idea of the occasional 3 some or something. Also, swinger exist which, as far as I know, is not technically poly, but I might be wrong there.
There's nothing wrong with having a polyamorous relationship. However, that doesn't mean it's for everyone. I'm monogamous myself and would be heartbroken if my partner wanted to open the relationship. It would make me feel like I wasn't good enough for them anymore.
Story2 I'm a stay at home wife/mom and have been for nearly my entire marriage. It was a decision we discussed *together* early on. This isn't something that can be sprang on a person after 12 years of marriage and presented as an ultimatum. Both parties have to be 100% on board, or it will not work.
Story 2:No,starting traditional from the beginning is good,being non-traditional is good too,But just switching EVEN WHEN YOU'RE HAPPY is just stupid,JUST EFFING STUPID (Rslash's advice is golden)
Why not ? No one bats an eye when someone wants to open an otherwise closed relationship.
And it's healthier than an open relationship, by far.
@@InitialDraal meanwhile comment section is full at eyes batting at opening relationships
@@mariposa9506 you got a life appart from stalking and responding to all my comments ? 😂
And no it's not. You've seen how much traditional relationships are sheet on where I commented yet I found only 1 or 2 comments against the open marriage in itself.
Add me and the majority of the wrold to those comments,cause the idea of open marriage is proven by the majority of the world to be just stupid
Nothing wrong with the traditional lifestyle at all I like it it’s just here’s the thing. You both have to agree to it and husband or boyfriend has to make to afford that lifestyle it’s not that simple. I know people both blue collar and white collar jobs who have that kind of lifestyle it just depends on those two factors usually
Iv seen that a lot on Reddit communicate first you can’t suddenly decide you want a trad wife
@tashacooper1753 I feel like anyone is allowed to change their minds at any point in time. Women initiate divorce 80% of the time so if it is ok for women to do its ok for men to do
@@nathankennedy3290 Your perception of traditional is flawed. 1, it is nothing like old sitcoms. 2, it was only a lifestyle that existed for a few decades. 3, it existed in a time when women couldn't own their own property
It's funny that a trad wife is making money off tiktok content instead of depending on their husband 100%. Math ain't mathing. As for OP, that ex will soon have 7 children with his trad wife, because they don't need contraceptives then he would be working 23 hours a day just to sustain them and he will call OP up to ask for a reduction in child support. 😂😂😂
@Ikajo I think you are the one confused lol men and women have had the same gender roles since the beginning of time and it worked fine until men invented air conditioned office buildings lol
Story 4: It's funny how some people "randomly" "suddenly learn" about polyamory and immediatly ask to open their relationship but then will try any form of guilt-tripping on their partner if they refuse. It's not because they truly feel like they're poly-amorous, it's because they want to fuck around while still having somebody to come back to as a back-up if their flings don't work out.
Bottom line is: A poly-amorous/open relationship is something that's agreed upon from the start of your relationship. If your partner asks/demands for it when you've already been in a committed relationship with them for a while, it's clear that they just want a free pass to cheat.
Maya is a W friend 110% we love to see it. Hate that it had to be seen that way, but still, love to see it.
There's absolutely nothing wrong with the traditional marriage lifestyle, but you can't force someone to live that life if they don't want to.
'Something called aftercare' is the saddest line for me. It's such a basic requirement for a healthy sex life, and she's never experienced it before Maya
"...I have to earn the right to say No"
Wow. I didn't think a few words could make me so upset, but here we are. Nobody should have to say that, unless it's relating to a business. Like a company, making deals, making tough choices.
Not relationships
Always remember that those aesthetic TikTok or Instagram content is a show for the camera the way actors look perfect for a movie. It's not real. No one looks and acts that perfect naturally. And such people are often either quite wealthy or in heavy financial debt to be able to afford such a lifestyle
Rslash! Love your stuff, been great to watch bc my son was born just a little before ur daughter from what it sounds like and we both first time parents. It's been great hearing how you raise your daughter giving me inspiration to raise my son ❤
It takes a special kind of stupid to say "You know who would make a great Best Man? The guy we both betrayed! This can't possibly blow up in our faces!"
Story 2 is the EXACT reason why I will NEVER have any social media outside of CZcams or LinkedIn, and will continue to deny my girlfriend urging me to download it. I don't hate tiktok, but I refuse to get roped into its insanity, because I already get enough of that from CZcams.
I downloaded tiktok for the first time last year, and a few weeks before the end of the year I removed it. It was too easy to lose track of time when using it, and a bunch of whiny bratty 16yos invaded the comment sections of content creators of the hobby community I'm in. It got on my nerves.
I don't think most people would be brainwashed into changing their life completely like OPs ex did. But there have been stories where one partner falls into some sort of content rabbit hole (podcasts, specific yt channels, etc) and does exactly that. Or gets new friends and they change his whole world view.
Story one: ‘Didn’t know how i’d react…’ i mean, come on. Of course you know that’s not right. That’s the start of a toxic relationship which someone untrustworthy.
My *MOM* back in the 80s, in the short period of time she was married to my dad, caught the eye of one of ALICE COOPER's bandmates during a concert. He got her name but that was it. A few days after the concert has had TRACKED HER DOWN AND CALLED HER to see if she wanted to go on a date. SHE DECLINED. And then she flexed like a mofo… and yes, I do realize the irony of calling my own mom a mofo, but she was the one who taught me what irony meant and taught us the Alanis Morissette's ironic was anything but, so she would be proud 😋.
Not even a year later my mom and dad hated eachother and my dad was convinced she was likely cheating. Not to the point of a call out or anything, more like a "yeaaaah, she was probably cheating on me." I wouldn't have put it past her, but only she and any potential partner would know, and she took it to the grave. She was absolutely stunning and a badass. Not ready to be a mom yet to my full blood brother, but I'm pretty sure my half siblings had a great childhood.
A few years before she was taken by cancer, we had buried our differences and were really great friends. I miss her dearly.
i didn’t think a wholesome homewrecker was a thing, but maya has opened my eyes.
Ruined wedding: Assuming it's a true story, they got what they deserved. Instead of rubbing the relationship in OP's face, the cousin should have asked a family member to relay the news to OP in a factual "just so you know" manner, rather than a "be happy for me!" manner. Also include a mention that he's not going to act clueless by inviting OP to the wedding when he knows how he hurt OP and that OP wouldn't want to attend/support their relationship. Basically apologizing and making it clear that he knows that he ruined things between them, that's he's sorry about that, and he doesn't want to make it seem like he's trying to hide the wedding. By doing that, he'd be apologizing for how things happened, and acknowledging OP's hurt and resentment. Instead, he showed, once again, that he doesn't care about OP's feelings. What a rotten cousin.
Story 1: You don’t leave, she leaves. File for divorce and don’t look back.
Toxic male: "My wife just stays at home and cost me money"
Also toxic male: "My wife don't want to stay at home"
The funny thing is the whole traditional relationships that some guys are looking for only existed for the wealthy, who could afford to only have one person working!
Second story: Someone as to go to the internet with the fact that most things there can be fake, this guy skipped that or probably the videos gave him enough confidence to show his real self.
The one thing I want to know is do these guys who believe that women should be "traditional wives" work jobs that can support a family on a single income? Because let's be honest, it's become pretty common nowadays for families to be dual income because either neither person makes enough money to support the household on their own or realistically only one of you needs to work, but that would require a lifestyle change due to other stop working. So, if you can afford to support a family, then congrats, go find yourself a "traditional wife" if it's really that important to you. If you can't, then don't act surprised when your partner doesn't want to quit their job or you realize you can't support your family on your income alone.
"Your exception isn't my exception." is the only way to sum up the first story
Oh my gosh Maya sounds like such a sweet and considerate / aware person! Super great friend to have
NO NO NO NO.
as someone who is poly, witb also poly partners, we did NOT force eachother into any of this. Before my girlfriend got with hwr lther boyfriend, we talked about jt. I said i was ok with it! I knkw she loves us both so im not jealous.
When my boyfriend cknfessed to me, i talked about it with ny girlfriend, completely ready to turn him down - even if i had feelings for him - if she asked me to. She gave me the go ahead, and now we're together!
Th point is, everyone needs to ve kk with it. No one shoulf be forced in a poly relationship. If its your thing, that's great! Lovely! If its nkt, stjll great!
The point is communication. If not everyone is ok witb it its just cheating, hiding behind a label.
It just pisses me off how people use thr label of a lovely community to mask how awful they are.
11:18 this behavior is the same as people telling you you must be gay (or straight) when youre not and forcing themselves or their friends on you because youre not the kind if straight (or gay) person they imagine youre supposed to be, or one they can understand. Reading books to be open minded is for acceptance of others, not for forcing into your life. If you arent of that persuasion, then you know youre not and the relationship ends right there. You dont need to read anything, you know your orientation and stuff, generally. And never need someone to tell you who you are.
how can you say you cheated and not expect to get yelled at by your boyfriend? the woman in the first post should just break up with OP and move in with her crush if that's what she really wants to do
Polyamory so rarely ever succeeds. I have a friend who's polyamorous, he swore to me that he loves both his partners equally, but I got messages from someone who's friends with both of us saying he's only in love with one of them and uses the other essentially as a toy.
I knew it from the start, odds are the reason he tried to convince me polyamory meant equal love for all partners is just cause I told him I hate it, and that all you're doing is using someone to get you off when the other isn't around, and that's not love at all.
Last story YES THAT IS HOW YOU HELP SOMEONE GET OUT you don’t brow beat them you make sure your home is open to them for when they’re ready to leave
That last story was such a good one. I am so happy that OP and their mom prepared for this scenario so that the sister could leave that relationship.
The whole: they are my exception, is not meant to be taken seriously. And anyone that uses it as an explanation is just making excuses for cheating.
The wedding story is just so sad. Like, don't get me wrong, the two cheaters totally deserved it, but based on the post it seems like literally years have passed between OP going no contact abd the wedding. The fact that OP's pain was so bad they haven't been able to let it go for years and even taking revenge hasn't really diminished the hurt and anger is just very, very sad.
I hope OP can find a way to truly move on eventually
Op got pstd
Betrayal of that extent doesn’t just go away over time. Hence OP going NC. He loved both of these people deeply and that shattered him. It’s much like grief, it has no time frame. Therapy helps immensely, but sometimes the experience hits you again like it just happened and it’s excruciating. The cousin and his wife got exactly what they asked for and deserved. PTSD is not something you “get over”. It’s something you learn to deal with in therapy with tools to guide you through.
Yeah, no. CZcams celebrities are not "celebrity exceptions." There's a VERY big difference between a CZcamsr and a movie or tv star/famous musician. The whole point of a "celebrity exception," is that the probability of getting with them is so astronomical that it's really not something to worry about. The probability of being able to DM a popular CZcamsr, let alone meet them, is significantly different. CZcamsrs have meet and greets, the majority of them often answer their fan messages, and their fame is just not the same. She was a manipulator just finding an excuse to cheat.
I have to give OP in the first story a small bit of advice: She DID try to tell you, and instead of saying something about it, you gave her a response that seemed to her that you would have done the same thing. And a celebrity hookup isn't "love" -- there isn't an emotional connection, and it doesn't say anything about how she feels about OP. But on OP's side, I also entirely understand why he would still feel hurt. This was a case of miscommunication, at heart, and it really shouldn't be relationship-ending. Because frankly, having sex with someone else without love is a lot less bad than loving someone else even if you never have sex.
My wife has told me about her exception. Neither of us think it's ever going to happen, and I don't think she'd actually go through with it if she ever did have a chance, but honestly, if she did? I'd be happy for her. Maybe a little jealous, but jealous OF her for getting to do it.
(The only celebrity crush I've ever had was on a fictional character, when I was a teenager. Obviously, that's never going to happen.)
Right when he said Tik Tok rots your brain I kid you not my phone went to a South Park commercial of token telling Kyle that he doesn't want to make Tik Tok videos with him anymore😂😂😂
5th story: Op doesn't know what poly is but is thinking about open relationships where they sleep with others and then they come back to one person, not what poly is. But yeah that relationship won't last and what even is op? "Straightest gay"????
2:00 celebrity crush? What a load of sh*t, she cheated, she deserves the consequences. Cheaters will rot in hell.
The mom in the last story was super smart! By keeping the "good items" at their home he couldn't hold those things over her like he tried to do! It allowed her daughter to see him as the trash he is without telling her what trash he is! She might not have gotten to say "thinks" but I'm sure the mom knows she saved her daughter from beyond the grave.
Last story: my parents helped me in a similar way. My ex was the same age as me but my interactions with him and my behavior made them notice something was wrong years before I did. They preferred to always be a place of security for me and not give unrequited, imperial advice into my relationship; to let my choices be my own. I dated him for 6 years and spend 1 year engaged. But then when I finally changed my view on him to what was actually happening, they were so ready for me to dump him, saying things like "you know, in any case, breaking up is a lot more easier to get over with than a divorce". It was so funny, and also reassuring for me that they let me actually understand things on my own instead of depriving me of a few bad experiences in life and likely making me resent them.
Because that's what you do to people who genuinely love you when you're too deep into a really bad relationship without realizing it.
I've always made it clear that the whole "celebrity exception" thing isn't something I'll even joke about. I've worked as an extra on major movie sets and it becomes painfully apparent that celebrities are just regular people and the notion of sleeping one isn't some impossible, unattainable goal. I actually had a fight with an ex literally because one of her "exceptions" was literally someone I'd met and worked with. The exceptions for celebrities thing is always a joke until it's not.
I talk a big game but if I got the opportunity to hook up with a celebrity crush I’d just leave. I’m in a relationship that I wouldn’t want to ruin for some person I don’t actually know.
Really missing the post-commentary for some of these stories. Not sure if they got lost in the edit, taken out due to contraversy, or if rSlash just didn't have anything to say.
Story five weirds me out a bit because has her bf never done aftercare? it doesn’t matter how vanilla or non vanilla you and your partner are aftercare is extremely important so both parties involved feel loved i think op did a good thing breaking up with her bf i hope that experience showed op some things she didn’t know she needed
Related to story 1 ('Don't know what to di, I love her so much): If your partner does something wrong, really really bad like cheating, do you still love then? Like, many many people love Keanu Reeves, but what if you find out he's done questionable things, would you still admire him or think 'Damn, I was wrong, f this dude'. So the difference is you both admire your partner and Keanu, BUT you've invested time, energy, love, tears and laughts with your partner so, in my opinion, you don't love them anymore, but what saddens you is all what you've thrown to that relationship and may not get back.
Going "traditional" will never be what so many people thought or expect it to be, there's no one side upper over the other kind of thing, just like another commenter said here, a "traditional" husband is a "leader" but is NOT a "boss" of the marriage, there's a huge difference between these two concepts a leader doesn't only provide great wealth and expectations, they also provide support and understanding to their partner ,even possible solutions and compromise, a "boss" doesn't do any of this, just great wealth and expectations, that's why some 'traditional' marriages fail to be balanced.
The same thing can happen when the dynamic is changed or are of equal sex, you're to support and provide comfort to each other.
I totally understand that multiple partners isn't everyone's cup of tea and that it should never be forced but "half poly" is a thing, ambiamorous. Someone that's content with having one partner or multiple partners with little to no preference. Sometimes I dislike negative polyam stories because it gives more hate to polyam people, again I totally know it's not everyone's thing but it just hurts.
Edit: This isn't to say OP should go against their boundaries to please their partner. If they aren't comfortable with a polyam/open relationship then that's totally understandable, forcing it is only going to make them hurt. I had an awful experience with an ex who identified as polyam but that's because she never talked to me. It's not like I wanted to know the ends and outs of every single thing her and her partner(s) were talking about but I just wanted to know the other person. I'm in far better relationships now because we communicate. Also it helps my first girlfriend already identified as ambiamorous herself when I was figuring out if I also identified with the label so it's not like I was randomly throwing it on her, I'd told her I was thinking I might be ambi and she said to figure things out. Her and my other girlfriend are friends :)
A cheater is a cheater. They will ALWAYS have an excuse to justify their way of thinking. When theres a convenient path of jokes about the subject that no normal person thinks is a serious conversation of course they will claim it was in fact serious all along and its your fault for misinterpreting it.
There is such thing as being "half-poly", it's ambiamorous, being comfortable in both polyamorous and monogomous relationships
Thank you! Made a comment about ambiamorous existing too
Story 1: Their is no such thing as an "Exception" when it comes to a relationship, if your in a committed relationships then your COMITTED and if your not, then well End of Story