r/Trueoffmychest My Husband's Mistress Came to My Wedding
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- čas přidán 9. 07. 2024
- Podcast: open.spotify.com/show/3hJo9o8...
Patreon: / rslash
Discord: / discord
0:00 Intro
0:09 Wedding ruined
7:37 Tragic story
12:49 Not invited
"Sneaky Snitch" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) License: CC By Attribution 3.0 - Komedie
How is nobody talking about how "Nicole" is the absolute worst person in the first story? I will say Mistress Sarah & OP's now ex-husband aren't blameless, but someone purposely inviting a homewrecker to a wedding to make a scene because they're a racist POS is another level of vile!
Reading this the first time, which is what rSlash always does, you'd never noticed Nicole's involvement here and seems to mainly be about OP, her husband and Sarah. Honestly, this story feels like this is all plotted by Nicole because she's against her being with her husband for obvious reasons and wants to break them up completely, and luckily for her, she has Sarah who's upset that her man picked OP over her, so what better way to break them up than by using her anger towards OP to ruin their wedding?
please
yes, I noticed as well how despicable Nicole is and how that went completely under Dabney's radar
He said Nicole was a terrible person tho
In a twisted way, nicoles vile character and involvement in the wedding was the best thing for OP.
Not gonna lie, the message to Lily made me misty eyed.
Really? I immediately pictured the Ryan gosling meme, " hey girl"
Dabney took us all on a feels trip. 😭😭
Same here! I hope that future he sometimes imagines never comes to pass, and that someday he and his daughter sit down to watch some of his videos together. Maybe she'll be laughing, and him cringing. But i hope they'll be alive and together as a family.
same, with me thinking why couldn't have i had a father like that
I completely agree. As a lifelong Daddy's Girl, I wish that I had a recording of my father's voice before dementia took his mind.
That "I knew it- I KNEW IT" always gets me, its so fun to hear, even though in most cases. It only comes out with cheaters and asshats
I love it, too! It always makes me giddy.
That , and when he says "Ah Ha!!!"
Is always humorous 😅
He think he's such a detective but it was so obvious
@@blahbleh5671let the little guy have his fun >:(
I was just thinking that lmao
First story, there's still a couple more updates after Rslash recorded. First one was her confronting Josh about it all and it went as poorly as you'd expect. First, along with confessing he admitted it was closer to *6* years that he was cheating on OP, not 4. Second, he tried to claim that since it was in high school, it shouldn't 'affect her much'. Third, he tried to claim it isn't bad because he isn't cheating on her 'still'. Overall he was defending Sarah. OP has a lawyer, she's told her mom everything and is moving in with her, she's getting the marriage annulled and she's going to try and get what she can, but a lot of it including the house and cars are in his name along with him having access to her bank account and she's worried about her dog. Sarah and Nicole are also blowing up her phone as of that point.
Latest update is the marriage has been successfully annulled, OP moved in with her mom, she was able to get one of the cars she was paying for along with her dog without a fight, and they had one last talk for closure, if OP is obviously still hurting. It also turns out that the reason Sarah and Nicole are trying to contact OP was to get on her about 'ruining Josh's reputation' because OP's been telling the truth about what happened. She's blocked them and her ex-in laws are still contacting her and are on her side. Otherwise seems like the end for now and OP is in recovery mode with her mom.
Thanks for these updates.
@@Tustin2121 her ex in-laws are on her side? Awesome!
So her Ex-husband is a scumbag all along, wow
Also the 'It was in Highschool' is bullshit, dude played two girls from different schools and is there a reason why he chose OP instead of Sarah? He had a job offer? Close to family? Because I highly doubt he loves OP
And happy that the In-Laws are on OP's side
Good for OP on getting that marriage annulled, meanwhile Josh, Sarah and Nicole are pieces of sh**t. I wouldn't be surprised if Josh and Sarah get married or are in a relationship after that mess.
Thanks ❤
rSlash! I demand you take a break and spend some more time with your daughter RIGHT NOW.
You're too good of a father for us to have your attention so much!
BuT oUr CoNtEnT!1! We DEMAND his CoNtEnT!1!
😅 Kidding aside, I agree.
And I hope you read what I wrote with his Karen voice. 😅
I think these are just the normal feelings of a full time working parent. On one end they want to provide for their family on the other end spend more time with them. You can't always have both. Even if he cuts down on hours, he'll still feel this way because his wife is there for Lily full time.
I will sue him and report him to reddit
I'm guessing he's doing these vids to support his wife and daughter. He's the sole breadwinner so he needs to do this to pay bills for his lovely family ❤
@TheEDFLegacy I cannot unhear the Karen voice reading this comment.
Story 1: This SOB not only let his mistress come to the wedding, but defended her when she ruined it? And I do not for one second believe he didn't know she was racist, he had the nerve to look you in the eye and make it seem like you did something wrong, can you prioritize his side piece over his own wife during their wedding. Imprints a real piece of human garbage to make cheating for 4 years not look like the absolute worst character tray about them. It's really hard to believe he ever treated you right giving everything you've talked about.
you seem to have misunderstood a few things
Sarah (the mistress) wasn't actually racist (that we know of), nor did Josh invite her.
both those aspects are on Nicole, the cousin
Also the jackass cousin Nicole? The husband is apparently fine with what she did. OP needs to think long and hard about who she ACTUALLY married.
@@dragonriderabens9761 I know the cousin let her in, but even if he didn't know she was coming when he saw her he should have been mediately made her leave, not let her stay. The only reason OP let her stay was because she thought that was her husband's friend. And of course after she destroyed the wedding cake him still not wanting her to leave. Also I called a racist because she apparently didn't like OP because she was mixed race, although I guess you can hate inter-racial relationships but have no problem with any race.
What's even more mess up is that Sarah isn't even mad at Josh, she's mad at OP
I think Josh lied about being single then dated her then ghost her
Like OP Sarah talked to Nicole about Josh and Nicole told her about OP
To think both Women consider the 'Other Woman' but never thought of getting mad AT the cheater?
I don't believe they aren't still seeing each other. There is literally no reason to let your mistress stay at a wedding she ruined. I wonder if he even wanted to get married.
Anyone else want to reach through the screen and hug rslash you really can tell he's a loving father your doing great @rslash keep on doing what your doing.
Him and OP and give OP's kids high fives. Man just listening to it....... man......
Yes, even if they don't show it most kids appreciate somebody who genuinely takes time out of their day for them. Frankly them actively avoiding their father prior to him dying was honestly really sad for me who.. well let's say hasn't had a very kind or supportive father..
Nope.
One day when she's older, Lily's going to listen to these videos and get to hear for herself just how much you love her. Like you said, it's clear from your comtent what your general morals and opinions on things are, but there's one thing that's crystal clear: you absolutely love your wife and daughter. I think anybody would be honored to hear themselves spoken of the way you speak about them on a regular basis. 💜
Story 1: there were more updates. OP confronted cheating husband, and he admitted to the cheating but claimed it didn't matter because it happened in high school and at least he's not cheating on her anymore. OP got the marriage annulled, got her property (car that was in ex's name but she paid for, and her dog) with the help of a lawyer. Ex's parents have been kind to her about the situation, but Nicole and Sarah were furious at OP for ruining ex's reputation, because OP has told the truth to anyone who has asked. People at ex's work place know about it because somehow word got around. The last conversation OP had with ex was calm, he said he understood why she left him. OP is living at her mom's and looking for a place of her own, and sadly feels she can never trust love again. I hope she can rebuild her life and eventually find happiness again.
Dude... get a grip on real life. Everone makes shit decisions in high school and generally, not always learn from it but most do. What op did not trusting them was fair. What op did trying to ruin their life after was not. I am not a cheater. Cheating is shit. Op is a bigger dick bag all things considered.
Story 3: The funniest thing about this whole situation was that all OP did was just chill at home and explain why he wasn't invited, and it resulted in a major divide between adults and fights. The brother has nobody to blame but himself (and maybe his wife's family)
True, especially when OP's SIL's family decided to escalate to harassment on social media, as detailed in the first update.
I can just picture op and his boyfriend at home just watching a film, while in the church there are just 2 large groups of people on both sides of the church yelling at the other group like it's a fucking court case.
What makes it even better is that he was asked not to attend so as not to cause an argument between the two families, but it totally backfired 😂
@@DarkStarCoreXI'm gay and if that happened to me and my partner, I'd just laugh so hard I'd cry. It's hilarious.
@@andredunbar3773 Link?
Update on first story: She annulled marriage. She got car, dog and stuff back. She lost home, but there nothing she can do it about.
I became widowed when I was 29 years old, my husband was 30 when he died of cancer. Our daughters were 1 and 3 years old at the time. He told me a few weeks before he passed that he was thankful that he was the one who was dying because he felt I would be the better parent to raise the girls. He was strong until his final day. I was a stay at home parent so the girls would naturally come to me first for everything. I make sure they knew what a great dad and provider he was for us. He asked me to find someone that would be a good husband and an amazing father for the girls. Two years later I found that man and we married a year later. We are still married and will be celebrating our 25th anniversary later this year. Oh, we had baby girl a year after we were married.
That's lovely, thank you for sharing.
I think it's a lovely thing that Lily has all these videos that you've made, just in the worst case scenario. I think you've been very good at showing your morals through all of them and I think that no matter if she has you in her life still, she'll still listen to your videos and find comfort and guidance through them
And she'll hear how much he loves her, and that he talks about her all the time.
@@THEDubbleHelixx that too ^^
Yeah, even if you die at 93 your kids would still love having these. My grandparents lived in Spain for a while and grandpa would just record cassette tapes as letters, talking about what he was doing and then he'd mail them to the kids and they'd send things back. I found one after my mom died and it was the only time I actually really head my grandfather as I was really fond of him but he died when I was two. I'd push grandma out of the way to greet grandpa first and I'd sleep on him. Any recordings are great to have.
@@Iflie that is such a sweet thing your grandpa did, I totally understand why it's very precious to you ❤️
@@DullyDust i think at the time it was just a good solution to a problem. I expect phonecalls would be more expensive and they fully expected the tape to be recorded over in the reply but somehow this one got saved. You never know what ends up important. Especially as it was so casual, you can imagine him walking around with the recorder just turning it on when he thought of something to tell them.
RSlash, for the second story, that was kind of the dynamic of my family. My dad worked and was the provider while my mom stayed home with us 4 kids. The best thing you can do? Be there as much as you can. Rewards, concerts, anything they’re in. I’m 24 now and while I remember my dad not being there a lot, I also remember all the events he showed up for and how proud of me he was back then. And no matter what, no matter what fight you have, always tell your kids you love them no matter what. That goes further than you might expect.
Edit: btw yes, I cried a little writing that and yes, I texted my dad to tell him I love him
This 💯
The BIL was a jerk for sharing that with OP. There was absolutely NOTHING to be gained from sharing that other than heartache.
@@jenniferann7212 It was probably selfish of his part, but he was on grief too and carrying that information alone would probably destroy him even more.
And honestly, OP as the wife has the right to know what was her husband's emotions at his last breath. It's not about what to gain, but the right to know.
R/Slash's little girl, if you are watching this someday in the future, whether your dad is still around or not, I want you to know that he loves you very much and that his videos made my and other people's lives better. I've started every day listening to his show and his wit, humor, and kindness fills me with hope for our specie's future. Also, he loves dogs - no more need be said!
As someone who thoroughly enjoys it when R/ goes off on one about Nicole or Lily, I've always loved the idea that she one day has these videos to hear and listen to him telling stories, being proud of her milestones, and just making his love for his family a part of his internet footprint.
Honestly, Nicole is one of the worst human beings. She knew OP and her husband were together but because she "didn't like OP" she decided to introduce OP's husband to Sarah? What kind of person does that? I hope everyone knows what kind of person Nicole is too because I would not want to be affiliated with someone like that. OP's (ex) husband and Sarah are absolute trash and they can have each other. Why was Sarah even invited to the wedding? That's honestly an insult to BOTH of them.
Edit: Thanks for making me cry on that second story. Please use your equipment to make a video for your daughter for like her 16th birthday or her 18th birthday, graduation, whatever. It doesn't matter if a plane has fallen out of the sky and taken you out or if you are still sitting right next to her that day. Make the video for her. Tell a story just for her.
Do you know why Nicole didn't like OP? It's because OP is mixed race. Yep, she's this racist and so against OP that she's willing to do anything to end the relationship and was basically using Sarah being mad at OP for 'stealing her man from her' to end the relationship. At least that's the feeling I got from her.
Second Story: Most men feel this way, please don't be afraid to show your love to your husbands/fathers and not just assume they know.
I told my father just about every day that I loved him. He died in June ‘17 (just days after Father’s Day in fact). Even though family and friends have assured me otherwise I still have lingering doubts if he truly did know how much I loved him and how proud I am to be his daughter. That second story was really rough to hear.
The worst part is those “jokes” about how he felt, were probably cries for help. Speaking from experience, that’s what they are when I make them:
easier said than done, kid.
Yea people are dumb. They don't cherish their parents when they are around, then when they die, the tears come out and they care like they've never have before. Pathetic. Laugh with them while they're here so you don't have to cry when they're gone
I was very close to my dad, and his death hit me extremely hard. It has been almost 3 years, and I can hardly go a few hours without thinking about how much I miss him. I recently had my best friend move in with my family, and I can't help but mention how much my dad would have adored him and would have tried to adopt him. Unfortunately, I now tend to slip into a deep depression in the days leading up to the anniversary of his death. 😭
*First OP:* I remember this story. I think OP had her marriage annulled. Best of luck to OP, and I hope everyone else involved get the lives they deserve.
*Second OP:* That's just heartbreaking. I also tend to gravitate toward my mom more so than my dad. I do tell my dad I love him and I always thank him for everything he's done for me. I hope he believes me.
*Third OP:* OP respected his brother's and SIL's request to not attend their wedding. The aftermath is on them (and SIL's family). _Apparently,_ OP's brother didn't understand that actions have consequences.
Good. She doesn't deserve that pos.
As for the third, apparently consequences are not something bigots expect. Those who did not attend my wedding with my husband have been removed from our lives. When they ask for help, it's not forthcoming. When they ask for forgiveness without visible change, it's not granted.
There was one story where a father knew he was dieing, and he made a cassette for every milestone he could think of for his child. Op cherished those recordings, and if I remember correctly was devastated when they finally stopped coming in. I think they had someone delivering them, but not sure it's been a dogs age since I heard it
This reminds me of an episode of Violet Evergarden 😭😭😭 but in letters
First Story: Ok, OP's husband's reaction to this is insanely suspecious. Sarah is throwing a fit, ruined the cake, and wedding decorations and he wanted to keep Sarah??? He also gets mad at OP for having her kicked out? Something is going on between this man and Sarah. Yeah, I’m 100% convinced something is going on between him and Sarah; he is demanding OP apologize to Sarah when she was the problem? Wooow, ok Josh is scum, Nicole is racist scum, and Sarah is pure scum. That explains everything, Josh has been cheating on OP for 4 years and Nicole helped Sarah with her revenge; honestly OP needs to get rid of all of these people because they are the worst
Second Story: Wow this is a very tragic story. OP's late husband felt like his kids didn’t love him enough and wouldn’t mourn his death but in reality, they are deeply grieving him and he will never know.
Third Story: Honestly, in OP's situation I wouldn’t care. I can never respect anyone that will go to any lengths to appease homophobes. OP did nothing wrong and only told the truth, OP didn’t ruin anything.
if you don´t see that the problem here is op then you didn´t understand the story, the red flags were always there and she chose not see them, i will never understand why women are so willing to ignore that just to get a wedding
@@robertorojasbalarezothey say love is blind for a reason
@@robertorojasbalarezolike another commenter said: love is blind. People tend to be blinded by love soooooo it seems like U don’t understand the story
@@robertorojasbalarezoI agree and disagree. The problem is absolutely the husband for being a cheating jerk. However, OP had HUGE red flags being waved right in her face and was too blinded by “love” to see them.
@@robertorojasbalarezowhat? Op was blinded by love, not everyone is self aware as you
I think that’s a very normal thing to think as a parent. It’s so clear how much you love your daughter and wife in every single one of your videos. Even though they’re not about your family, your love for your daughter and wife show in your work. You’re a wonderful Dad!
Rslash's monologue about his channel being a time capsule was beautiful.
My heart sank fro a moment when Rslash finished reading the second story and said "as I'm reading this, my wife..."
I remember when I was little, my brother and I would get so excited seeing my dad bc I always saw my mom, but my dad always worked. so whenever he came home, we would run out to his parked car and fight eachother to see who could get to him first. I remember having my heart broken when I heard him say, "I miss seeing you guys run to my car, I know you won't do it forever, I just miss it".... I love you papá
Gosh, I couldn’t even imagine finding out that my husband cheated on me for so long. I KNOW he would never and he knows I wouldn’t but that would absolutely break me. Then again, I’ve never had anyone be so upfront about having feelings about my husband and he would have kicked someone out of I asked him to. That’s what you do for your significant other. This girl had some huge red flags from the beginning so I’m surprised that she’s surprised about how things turned out.
It isnt dark at all but actually a sweet thought you had there it sure is comforting to know that something of you would remain for your loved ones
Story 1: OP's husband is acting very suspiciously, Sarah ruins the cake and decorations, and throws a fit, and OP's husband still wants to keep her? Damn, and he even got mad at OP for kicking her out? I got a theory that he and Sarah are having an affair. Or else why would he go above and beyond to defend her like that? I would be livid at her!
There are some updates to the first story, OP had the marriage annulled, moved back with her mom, got one of the cars and her dog back.
Regarding the second story: My 5yo highly favors me over my husband, her dad. My husband works more than me and his job takes him out of town frequently. He comments that our child loves me more or doesn’t love him at all. It’s a tough situation and we try very hard to give him ways to give them time to bond. Rslash’s fears are absolutely valid and a real concern.
Story 1 : Get annulled quickly or you will continue to get hurt in this "marriage "...
"How could I be so foolish" op love makes you do crazy things and ignore severe red flags that are the size of godzilla
Story 2 : reminds me of me and my grandfather .. i never got the chance to tell him goodbye before he died rarely spent time with him when he was alive.. he passed 24 years ago today..
Story 3 : op brothers wife side of the family are horrible people and so is his brother and his sin in law.. bunch of losers..op you didnt ruin your disgusting brothers wedding he and his wife did by giving in to the homophobic jerks..
She didn’t ignore any flags
@@Batman-lg2zj Right? I don't know why people keep acting as if OP did something foolish here. She dated the guy from her freshman year, didn't know this other girl existed. Why then do people think she 'should have known'? Also, the husband apparently broke up with that person 5 YEARS ago. It's sketchy that the husband wasn't angry at Sarah or Nicole for ruining their wedding!
She got the marriage annulled, got her car, dog and bank account with the help of a lawyer and is now in the process of starting her life over. There were more updates.
@annika5893 good.. I'm in the waiting room while listening so I'm getting little by little...
@@annika5893 Thanks for the update! I’m so glad she ditched that cheating scum.
*UDPATE ON 1ST STORY*
Basically, she talked with her husband. She told him everything, that she knew about him and Sara and begged him to tell him it wasnt true. But he told her yes, he was dating Sara while dating OP but once it got real with OP ditched Sara. Thing is, this lasted for a long time. He told her that that happened a long time ago and shouldnt matter.
She broke up with him, that she loves him but cant see him as the caring husband he was, that she was so in love with him she Didnt see what was happening. Afterwards, she hired a lawyer cause her things and bank acount were on his name, also try to null the marriage and went to live with her parents.
In the other update, says that she broke up with him, nulled the marriage and got most of her things (car, bank account, whatnot and even the dogs) but not the house; both paid for it so theres nothing she can do for now.
Her parents, his friends and ex's parents know and everyone is conforting OP. Sarah called saying she was a drama queen and that shes ruining her reputation. OP blocked her.
For now, OP is rebuilding her life and moving forward, at 23yo
She thanks everyone in reddit, tho she isnt planning on getting revenge.
most important: she got the dog
The audacity of Sarah saying OP was being a drama queen when Sarah was the one who got trashed and caused a scene at OP's wedding!
@@Human-kb6xc
I dont understand some people.
How does one try to destroy a wedding after dating a known Cheater be so willing to call the victim a drama queen?
I'd hate to know that girl as a friend, I have a feeling she carries a lot of Convenient knives
@@AdaireKrickets Sarah is probably salty because Josh will forever blame her for ruining his wedding with OP, and her chances of getting him are pretty much zero now.
@@DarkEinherjardoubtful, trash loves trash. The groom didn't wanna kick her out even after such a scene and continued defending her. They deserve nothing but each other.
Dabney you fucking made me cry. Lily is truly lucky to have a father like you, whether it’s for a long time or a short time.
RSlash, we know that you love your daughter so very much. You might not talk about her often but when you do the love that you have for her is evident.
I was already tearing up at the second story and the message to Lily turned it into full on crying! I hope she never doubts how much you love her.
k, wasnt expecting to cry on an rslash vid today but, yes this channel can be a time capsule but you have the equipment to make one video just for her every once in a while and just put it in a folder called just in case and maybe show them at her wedding one day if youre so lucky
RSlash,
At the very least you love your wife and child. That is more than many many many children who grow up to be adults who hate and want nothing to do with their parents and family like a lot of the reddit stories.
Do not fear the absence of love because you and your family are putting in the work and you are keeping it in mind.
I really hope it wouldn’t come down to this channel being your daughter’s only connection to you. That really made me tear up, this has brought on a whole deeper meaning to your content.
I wish you and your family a long and fruitful life together, RSlash. 😭
Update to the first story: OP confronted her husband and he confessed to everything. He was cheating on OP for almost 6 years and ended things with Sarah after high school. According to him that made it alright somehow. OP had the marriage annulled and is staying with her mom until she figures everything out.
There are two more updates to the first story. Look up the username if you want to read them.
Basically the marriage was annulled after the husband first tried begging and then threatening to keep her car etc.
So not much drama in the updates, but it ended as well as it could have for OP.
its not dark. as a daughter who knows little of her living father as a Person and not a Dad, it makes my heart very happy to hear. your daughter will know how much you care about her because even if you can't always make the Time happen, your true feelings will be known as long as you can continue to express them through word and action. love ya rslash , you're a good dad
Story 3.. when are people gonna realize that when LGBTQ go anywhere or do anything….THEY DO NOT END UP IN BED in front of you, or sleep in YOUR bed..when I see two men or two women standing in front of me I don’t usually think “oh they are gay” but if they are it don’t hurt me!!!!😢
Yeah like why are people so afraid of two men holding hands. How would they feel if a male toddler was holding their dad's hands? They wouldn't care, but the instant it's two adult men holding hands, they feel scared and for whatever reason have to belittle them because they don't follow the "societal norm".
@@DarkStarCoreXOr they call that same sex couple holding hands the "G" word.
@@bibianaguadalupeislasherre9880 I mean gay isn't an insult, heck i believe it's a fairly accepted term for gay people. It's not derogatory in any way btw.
@@bibianaguadalupeislasherre9880 The word used to describe gay people in a derogatory way (the f slur) is the one I have a problem with though.
@@DarkStarCoreX Those are not the words I'm talking about, it's the one conservatives use it's called "Groomer".
Story 2: He *was* telling you how he felt. “Joking about it” is the closest men are told they can come to actually telling others about our problems without permission. Those “jokes” are how we learn to ask for permission to talk about ourselves. Because we can’t let ourselves be a burden.
RSlash not only is thinking about these videos for your daughter sweet. Your message to her sweet, but the times you have talked about her and loving her and taking care of her and wanting and trying to be the best father, it will come through. Even if nothing tragic does happen if she just listens to these videos when she is older and you are still around.
That message to Lily was so shocking and sudden feeling but one day she’s gonna break down crying at it happy to just hear her dad talking to her.
The worst part about losing someone is the fact that you'll forget the sound of their voice. You'll remember their face, but the sound of their will leave your memory fast.
Adding to the Lily thing. She'd get to see how we reacted to you as well! She'd get to see what a great job her dad had, what a funny guy he was when he does his entitled parent voices, and so on. She'd be able to laugh, cry, and even hear the dog too! It's not just a time capsule for you, but also for the dog as well. All the puppy bloopers!
The last story needs to be the start of a sitcom. Just OP and his boi chilling at home while absolute chaos erupts at the wedding party. Cutting between scenes of them relaxing, chit chatting, and I don't know, feeding each other grapes, and scenes of fisticuffs, screaming matches, and a food fight.
As someone who lost both of her parents, yes, these videos are going to be a treasure for Lily. I wish I had more recordings of my parents voices than just their voicemail messages. Pictures are one thing, but the sound of a loved one's voice is incredibly comforting. When I have kids, I plan on making a bunch of recordings, digital, tape, every medium I have to insure they still have my voice when I die.
Hey RSlash, you have no idea how much this channel will mean to her. I have nothing left of my dad except the blanket he swore my step mom never made for him (admittedly, i cling to it like Lyness from Charlie Brown). I can barely remember the sound of his voice. My dad was very camera shy, so i also have very few pictures of him. Lily is so lucky to have a dad who's a CZcamsr because when you inevitably pass (hopefully from old age), she'll have this record to listen to and show her children.
You going out of your way to tell Lily that you love her hit me in the chest.
If it helps, my dad was active duty military post 9/11 and I barely saw him starting at age 8 bc he and my mother didn’t live together and he was constantly underway.
He had the same worries you did, and I admit that I struggled a little in my teens, but I knew deep down that my daddy loved me because he said so all the time.
I promise, Lily knows. Even when she’s mad at you and calls you “Dabney” instead of dad in like 12 years, even when she tosses out the first “you’re not my friend anymore” at age five or “I hate you” at age 15, even when she gives you the silent treatment bc she can’t go play or borrow the car.
Just keep telling her. It’s sticking, I promise.
rslash you are such a wholesome lovely guy. Your comfort over having this archive here for your daughter is actually so sweet.
Dabney, every time you talk about your wife and daughter, my heart is absolutely struck by how loving you are and how deeply you care for the both of them.
Your daughter will always love you. I'm sure of it.
If my dad could actively neglect me & still have me adore him for 18 years, I have trouble seeing how a man so openly affectionate and caring would have to fight for his daughter's love.
It's not dark, but it's incredibly sweet Dabney ❤❤❤ your daughter is a lucky girl ❤️ 🥰🥰 you're doing just fine
I think your thoughts on death and your channel are actually quite beautiful. It's so important to find joy and comfort in the smallest things in life, and what you expressed in this fall into that
We went from rSlash playing Sherlock Holmes on a story to him getting too real and expressing his fears to us. Very unique episode.
Dabney, you forgot one important thing. All your subscribers being here with you and cheering you on being a good father. She's gonna see that too. She's going to see your legacy.
First story: its worse. He wasn't cheating for 4 years he was cheating for 6 YRS! I think OP mentioned in a follow up that she's divorcing/annulled her STBX.
Story two : as someone who lost their father some time ago this is extremely relatable and I felt similar to the kid in this situation , I hope they can recover from this .
The thing about having your voice for your daughter really hit hard. My dad recently passed from a freak accident . It destroyed everyone once we realized we have no audio of his voice. He hated videos but you don’t think it’ll matter until it does.
I regret every day that I don’t even have a 2-3 second clip of his voice
Same.
rslash, what you said about your daughter listening to these when shes older was so beautiful and heartbreaking. not only would she be able to know the sound of her dad's voice but learn about your sense of right and wrong, laugh with you, cry with you, know how much you adore her and her mother (and Yugo obviously). if you were to die, she would still get to know you in a way.
Last Story: Ok Op lets get something straight. YOU didn’t ruin the wedding, not at all. Your brother and his homophobic wife did. You KNOW they were going to tell everyone a story that paints YOU as the villain as to why you never showed up.
You did nothing wrong but i dont see your relationship with your brother mending after this.
It's really his fault for not letting OP's parents know about it, perhaps he never said anything about them because he knew that if they ever found out why, they were going to go after his wife's family for being homophobics and him for agreeing to marry her knowing what her family is like. OP couldn't've known about any of this. This explains why he said that OP ruined the wedding, OP ruined the wedding simply by telling the parents the truth that he didn't want them to know.
Update to The Last Story, not going to type too much but basically the brother ended up being disinherited after the mom said point-blank, leave your homophobic ass wife or we're going to disinherit you, after he refused, they made it come true
Rslash I love you. I have been watching your videos since you were doing video games. I felt like I was there when you got married, your dog, and your daughter. I know I’m just a listener but you are a big part of my life. I literally can’t go a day without hearing your voice.
You have helped me though some dark times. You are amazing and one of the few CZcamsrs that I follow that hasn’t changed.
It might be sad but your the only consistency I’ve had since starting high school. Now I’m 21 and it’s crazy how much I’ve grown since finding your channel.
For the last story i like to imagine going back and forth between two scenes:
Scene A: OP and his bf vibin quietly at home, nice, gay, and introverted, maybe cuddling.
Scene B: the wedding on FIRE, the people divided into two groups with warpaint and spears, fighting over the injustice of not inviting OP 😂
I've always been closer to my mom.
Look. My dad pushed me away. If u r there for ur daughter, comfort her when she comes to u. Help her when she asks for it. Don't push her away. My dad did (he was afraid his mental illness would badly affect me) push me away. What it did was tell me that I can't go to him for anything. Hell, he's the reason why I force myself to not cry and to automatically disassociate to stay ok
“They aren’t currently together” but he did invite her to the wedding? Yeah that’s a load of BS. Maybe he was hoping she would cause a scene before the vows so he could do some cringey rom-com s#!t and run off with his “true love” on his wedding day.
He didn't invite her. Nicole brought her for the dramaz.
I saw someone bring this up on another video, but after RSlash's chat about Lily, I think it's an even better idea than before. One day a week, Rslash should cover a wholesome sub and read positive stories. Wholesome Wednesday, or something. I think it would be a good idea for everyone's mental health and give Lily some happier videos to listen to when she's older
Your daughter will definitely know how much you love her from these videos because you always talk about how much you love being a dad how you would fight for her and her mother. So don’t worry Dabney there wouldn’t be any doubt in Lilys mind that her daddy loves her ❤
I hope that everyone is having a good Thursday!
Thanks, you too
Thank you!
i can't sleep
I hope you do too😌
Thanks bro, you too
When you selfreport not only as the side piece but as a trash human being 🤣🤣🤣
First Story have further updates; she successfully had her marriage annulled after her ex-husband admitted to his acts.
Thankfully he was decent enough to give back things she owned without the need to go to court, and as it stands everything is over, and she can move on with her life. He's also not trying to win her back or trying to guilt-trip her into staying, which is unusual for Reddit.
She's also cut contact with Nicole and Sarah, and apparently her ex-husband has _also_ cut contact with Sarah.
Probably the cleanest annulment I've read on Reddit. I'm very happy for OP for that because it's not normally that clean. It's also refreshing for an ex to act somewhat normally in an annulment; I'm so used to seeing the Karens and Chads in these cases.
Hey rslash, I know I'm on the opposite side of this, but my son has gravitated more towards me and due to my mentality, I am leaving a bunch of welding notes for his future so I can still be there for him. Your message hit home for me and just know you are loved even if your child doesn't show it.
3rd story: Even if op brother and sister in law aren't homophobic they are enabling the homophobic family members which personally i see close to being just as bad as being homophobic.The sister in law family and op brother ruined the wedding not op. Just because your married doesn't mean you stick up for your partner wrongs. You let them know "your in the wrong" and you support them when their right! You don't support both.
Exactly! It’s like the saying that goes along the lines of “if there is a Nazi sitting at a table and 10 other people are sitting with them (and are not saying anything against the Nazi’s views or standing up for victims of the Nazi in any way), there are now 11 Nazis at the table”. Even if the brother and SIL won’t admit to being homophobic, they’re just as bad as the SIL’s family since they’re choosing to placate bigots instead of supporting someone the brother “supposedly” loves and cares about.
Another great video by rslash!
But Dabney, if you don’t mind I ask, what is your favourite subreddit to read off?
The message to his daughter really got me sobbing in the bathroom while tryna get ready for work 😭
I remember one video where rSlash talked almost in tears about Lily's birth, after reading a story about how a deadbeat dad almost missed his own son's birth over a football game. It was so wholesome.
“I KNEW IT, III KNEW IT 😈😈”
Day 17 of asking Dabney to record gaming again!
DABNEY THAT MESSAGE, the one for your daughter!! I'm crying for real. I've been listening to you for YEARS AND YEARS, so I feel like you're kind of a part of my life, because listening to rslash has been a part of my daily routine since I'd say around late 2019, I've listened to so much about you, your opinions, your family, I remember you first saying you're even having a kid, so listening to that message to her just in case made me genuinely cry. I love you man, one of the best CZcamsrs out there and to be honest the only one I've even watched so consistently for so long❤
I really don’t consider your thought process dark, when talking about that type of outlook on life.
It’s actually very sweet! Knowing that she can listen to you read your Reddit stories & simultaneously drop in little bits, thoughts, or memories you have of her while she’s young! Knowing that they will all be there for her to check out & listen to whenever she wants!! 💖💞
Story about OP’s husband dying: honestly, the kids are assholes. No! The dad didn’t know how much his kids loved him because they didn’t bother to show it in any capacity. Like not posting something for Father’s Day but doing it for Mother’s Day is a dick move, especially when the dad is legitimately trying and isn’t an abusive jerk.
That post got me sobbing in my car on the way to work. I couldn’t imagine if my dad said that about me and my siblings. I show my love and appreciation for my dad whenever I can. He’s 73 (although you would never know by looking at him) so I know I probably don’t have much time left with him. He’s the most selfless person you’d ever meet and has quite literally given me his last $5 when I needed it; that’s what you do for your kids and I’d do the same for my son. Ok need to stop crying and get to my office.
There is nothing dark about your feeling about this being a "time capsul" because it really is, it teaches your kid(s) so much, and lets them connect with you, even if you aren't around. Steve Irwin died when his son was still a baby, never got to know his father and his Daughter lost him when she was still young. Not only did they have the well wishes from people world over, but they could watch their father on video, hear his humor, his excitement, feel his energy even long after he was gone.
Basically, you making this channel, will one day, be something your child/children can look at, and enjoy, and share with their own children what kind of person you where, and see all the people you could entertain and the community you built.
Short story for Dabney(Dabny? The father of Lily. Lilly?)
When I was moving out, my grandmother had a big cry, she was essentially my mom. The one who cared for me, helped me though anything, drove with me across the country to my new home state. I knew she loved me because she always tried to bring me with her on vacations, to the store, to spend time with me. My grandfather on the other hand was very “professional” with me. Always trying to have me shake his hand, very quiet when we were together, the only real time he sat me down to have talks was the odd time we were both awake at midnight while he was drinking. When I was setting out, 7 in the morning with my car loaded up, he came out to see me off. I was already appreciative of that, since he normally couldn’t be woken up from his sleep even if the fire alarm was blaring next to his head. He had woken up 4 hours early just to see me off. I went to shake his hand and he grabbed it and pulled me in for a hug while I heard him crying, wishing me good luck and to know he loves me. That was the moment that I knew my grandfather really did love me just as much as my grandma, even if he didn’t always know how to show it. So Mister rSlash, just know that even if you aren’t spending as much time as you can with Lilllly, just make sure that you show her as much love as you can during the time you do spend together. She will see it and will appreciate it, and I know this won’t get rid of the fear you have in your heart, but I hope my message can help to lessen it, for you and anyone who is afraid their love isn’t enough
Story 2: what happened here was a lack of or poor communication. If OP's husband has expressed his feelings to OP, then maybe things wouldve happened differently. Its sad that this has happened at all. My condoleneces to OP.
Second Story:
My mom wasn't a stay at home mom, but she was the next closest thing (she taught at the school I attended, and I always had to hang out in her classroom after school). My dad worked in emergency medicine. He missed a lot of extracurriculars and holidays because he was working. We would always try to reschedule around him, but it wasn't always possible. Anyway. I love my dad. I post about him for father's day. I remember his birthday. We have a trip planned together to a museum in a neighboring city in a few weeks. Some of my fondest memories of childhood were the simple times with him. The days where he was on call, so we couldn't go anywhere and he would play with me. The times where he would have a golden weekend, and we would go camping. Him reading to me from a medical textbook because he needed to study for his recertification and I needed a bed time story.
It's the little things, Rslash. If you make time for the little things, the relationship will grow.
I remember as a kid it was easier to go to my mom rather than my dad, but as an adult I actually got closer to my dad than my mom. My mom passed in 2017 and I had two years getting to know my dad better.
What I would suggest, Dabney, is make sure you create moments with Lily now. Don’t wait for her to listen to you on a CZcams channel. Tell her about yourself and your life as a kid. Not a… “when I was your age” type story that tells her how she should deal with something, just good life stories.
I loved the stories my dad would tell, he was such a funny man and had been a very adventurous kid, occasionally getting into trouble. Man!!! I would be in tears listening to him. So do it now! Be present as much as possible. I miss my dad so much. I wish I could hear him tell those stories again. ❤
Your message to your daughter was a gift beyond anything you can imagine, my father left me nothing but bad memories and I would give anything for that. You are a
10/10 dad
12:34 Your daughter, your wife, your grandkids. Hell, they might put on a playlist for your whole damn funeral.
Hey r/slash, I've been watching your videos for years and the amount you mention your daughter, how much your perspective changed when you became a dad, when she watches these videos it'll be impossible for her not to know how much you love her
My brother felt the same way as the dad in Story 2. He and dad got along, but not very well. He always said dad would not cry when he died. Dad was hysterical when he got the call from my sister-in-law. He still cries.
It's been a year. Dad buried some of his ashes in the front yard and put some in a necklace that mom and I have. When done, he sat on the couch and cried. We took the ashes to Denver and scattered some. During the whole trip (WV to CO) he was upset, but not teary. Mom said when we got back, dad decompressed, since he did all the driving. He said he just sat on the couch and cried. I wish my brother knew how much dad loved him.
Your message to Lily was beautiful.
That second story hit me hard.
Out of my siblings, I was the closest to my dad. We had the most in common; we went to concerts together, to the movies, etc. He tried with the others, but they wanted to be teens. He also worked 2nd and 3rd shifts and needed sleep during the day.
The night he died, my brother that's closest in age, expressed so much regret in never taking him up on his requests to go golfing.
Sometimes I feel guilty about it, but it isn't my fault we did so much together and them so little, but I know it wasn't my fault.
rSlash, just by being there at home and thinking about your kid, you are already doing way better than a large amount of pseudo-parents. You're doing great.
I have left each of my kids voice-mails saying just in case I pass away, please know how much I love you, then give them a compliment or tell a short story. My health has been poor most of my life, so I often think about ways to help them cope with my passing.
Honestly, that you can use this channel as a timecapsule so your daughter -- or anyone really -- can get to know you a bit and even hear your voice if you suddenly pass is wholesome af.
Hey rslash, it's a very rational fear. My wife and I are going to be a dual income household and our biggest fear is actually that our daughter will gravitate more towards her caretaker. It's something I'm dreading everyday as my leave end date approaches.
You're not alone. From the sound of things, your marriage is healthy and I'm sure your wife talks you up and is making sure your daughter never thinks less of you.
I like the time capsule mentality. Not many people have this type of record of themselves. I'm glad it's comforting 😊
RSLASH, you’re a phenomenal dad and your daughter knows you adore her. Start taking her out for Daddy/Daughter dates now! Our daughters, 23 & 25, still go out on dates with my husband. It’s either dinner, lunch, the range, bowling…fun stuff! When they were wee ones, they’d get all dressed up and have me do their hair “special”! ❤❤
2nd story, BIL should have kept that to himself unless he were to tell them before the dad passed away. It serves no purpose now other than to make them feel bad during their time of grief. Kids connect with their parents in different ways, it doesn't mean the parents are less loved. How sad for any parent to feel this way. 😢
Second story, I am so sorry for your loss. Same situation same questions. 10 weeks from diagnosis to sudden passing. My daughter forgot to say goodbye to my husband when we went out quickly. He also had cancer. He passed away while we dropped the dog of at the vet. She blames herself. She was 13 and rebelious, she didn't spend that much time with him. She has so many regrets. My son didn't want to spend Christmas with him, he went to his inlaws instead,. Same issue. We healed by focusssing on all our good moments and keeping his memories alive. You deal and cope in the moment with the knowledge you have, the feelings of denial, which leads to less visits. Even if love was not tangible, it is still there. May your husband RIP, and you and your children have peace in your mind and hearts.
Growing up my mom was a stay at home mom and my dad worked all the time to support his family. Growing up I didn't see a lot of him but he made sure that when he was home he spent quality time with his kids. He would read a bedtime story to us every night and every Sunday he would make us breakfast. Growing up I never loved my dad any less than my mom and we still have a good relationship now that I'm an adult.
As long as you spend time with your daughter, I'm sure she'll love you just as much as her mom and will probably even get excited when you finish work because now she gets her father's attention. I know insecurities don't just go away but hopefully my message helps make them a little easier to bear.
rSlash, I think everyone here will agree that if your child did see these videos, she would understand just how much you've impacted everyone who watches your videos, whether from entertainment or giving out advice/constructive criticism.
She would not feel bad, she would be happy knowing just how much you've helped, even changed people's views and outlooks on the world. Even support.
Yes, it okay to feel worried, but don't let it scare you, heck, take the time off to spend more time with her if you feel the need to, but she will NEVER hate you, sad maybe, but not anger.
Hope this brings you some comfort, peace and love to you and your family sunflower, you deserve it.