r/Trueoffmychest Husband Secretly Did Surgery on My Va****
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- čas přidán 9. 07. 2024
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0:00 Intro
0:09 ad
1:21 Husband stitch
5:19 Home country
7:42 Parasite
"Sneaky Snitch" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) License: CC By Attribution 3.0 - Komedie
Dude, they call it the “husband stitch”. Not the “husband and wife stitch”. The woman’s comfort and health is not taken into consideration at all.
Like throwing a hot dog down a hallway
@@chase15athat is NOT how women's bodies work at all😭
@@chase15a
Tell me you don't know how vaginas work w/o telling me you don't know how vaginas work
@@chase15a How is your micro penis a woman's fault?? Blame your daddy for giving you bad genes 💀
@@chase15aWay to expose yourself and show you’ve never been with a woman LMAO
He's not remorseful because he saw how much it impacted your recovery. He's remorseful because he's not getting laid anymore
Exactly. That man has shown how he doesn't care about her, let alone see her as a human being. All he cares about is himself and his dick.
Good, I’m hoping it leads to divorce. His “remorse” and him asking for couples therapy is laughable, he screwed up big time doing this to her, which is especially horrible knowing she’s an SA survivor. I also HATE that everyone is telling her “get over it”, like WTF
I bet it's tough for a neurosurgeon to pull trim.
@@jsum33no amount of money and prestige is worth genital mutilation.
You can't possibly know that, but sure.
Any doctor that performs a husband stitch on someone without the actual patient's consent should be fired and have their license revoked.
Fun fact, it's considered medical malpractice because it goes beyond what is medically necessary.
Actually I'd say life in prison for SA.
@@pastelroswellall SA should be life in prison to be honest along with those complicate in SA.
@@samaccardiI went looked up the story. It's a Muslim majority story. This is not against the law there. Women do not have bodily autonomy. liberals are out there screaming about how important bodily autonomy is. It's not just about abortion. So unfortunately this is not illegal in their country. Woman doesn't own her own body her father does and then when she's married her husband does. Welcome to the middle ages my friend.
Judging by what OP wrote, that isn't going to happen.
The "husband stitch" is the most disgusting concept I've ever heard of in my entire life. I can't even articulate how infuriating its existence, of which I was blissfully unaware prior to this video, is to me. What a foul, disgusting thing to force on someone else's body against their knowledge or wishes.
Boohoo
@@hardup9809 Yep, I expected replies like this. Thanks for being predictable.
Not only that, pretty much all OBGYNS will tell you it doesn't make the women tighter, it just makes the opening to the vagina smaller! If a man asked someone to do that to his wife, the doctor should ask, the man who small his um member is that he needs the woman smaller.
If what you are writing is true then you have been living a very sheltered life and not taken much time to research about the world and different cultures.
Just google "Female circumcision".
It is truly awful how misogynistic some religions and cultures can be.
@@RabbitmancerDon't give them attention. Its a troll they thrive off reactions
Last story: The true irony is that the random men she invited in were better people that helped OP more then his wife, that honestly blew my mind and had to pause the video to wrap my head around it.
Seriously. Keep the helpful roommate, ditch the wife.
I think the OP in the last story is helpless and has no self respect. Or it’s a troll post. I can’t imagine someone with that little dignity and backbone.
If he tolerated all of this garbage for years and still loves that POS Connie then i going he’s going to listen to people on Reddit and his his life
It sounds like the wife is good at curating and connecting good people, but not good at being one. He said she has mental health problems, so maybe she’s struggling to be a good person and failing at it (offering the home to those guys in need who turned out to be better than her)
literally, like just marry Roy and kick her out, he's a much better house spouse
@@kennywilliams6266 Like, even if it's just for the tax benefit
I lost massive amounts of blood after the birth of our first son, I had a lot of stitches. I informed my husband what a husband stitch was and he was horrified. I'm sorry that these terrible husband stories exist but they continue to make me grateful for my husband.
*sending good vibes* pretty sure that being told of what a husband stitch turned me gay, aint no way i wanna grow a human.
The more I learn about pregnancy and giving birth the more scared I am 😭 I still plan on doing it but Christ there’s so many risks. How do you think it’ll go if I tell all the medical personnel “if someone gives me a husband stitch I stg I will find out who’s responsible, hunt you down, and give you your own nice little stitch attaching your mouth to your anus. THEN I’ll report you and ensure you lose your license. Everybody clear on that!?”
The idea of a "husband stitch" is grossing me out so much. It is *mutilation of a woman's body without her knowledge or consent* plain and simple. It's detrimental to the victim's physical and mental health and deserves to be punished with years in prison - the husband as well as the doctor.
I mean if the wife consents to a husband stitch, it’s not that big of a deal. The main issue of the story is that the doctor lied to the husband about the process, and the husband trusted his friend, and forced his wish upon his wife and allowed her body to be mutilated.
@@DarkLobster69the main issue is that the husband agreed to do it without consulting his wife. don’t blame the doctor, blame the SURGEON OF A HUSBAND.
@@DarkLobster69 No woman consents to it, that's why it's called a "husband stitch".
@@DarkLobster69 Absolutely not. The husband stitch only causes pain and sexual dysfunction to women. A woman would only ever agree out of insecurity and being falsly informed on top of that.
@@DarkLobster69That is only partially the problem. As OP stated, women’s rights aren’t a priority in their country. The fact that he not only didn’t need her consent but that he didn’t ask for it in the first place is a sign of the culture. The thing about the husband stitch is that the pain doesn’t go away and often seals off the urethra as well. Making going to the bathroom difficult and painful. Menstrual cycles are also difficult and can lead to infection because the flow doesn’t have a proper exit to get rid of that waste. There is no upside to the husband stitch in any way. Not even for the husband because either it’s made to tight for him or his wife is in so much pain she can’t even be touched. Quite often they can say goodbye to having another baby too or there’s even a higher risk of complications (potentially fatal) during birth. It’s an archaic practice that’s been banned in so many countries for a reason.
Your husband consenting to a husband stitch without consulting you is sexual assault.
Problem is that such things legal in most the world. Most countries the woman doesn't even have a say
@reaganbryant6520 such is life
@@reaganbryant6520if OP is in the US, if I remember correctly, it is actually illegal here. I SO hope OP is in the US or another country where it's illegal.
It also means he has a tiny member. How small do you need it, sir?
No it is not. When one partner is not legally able to make medical decisions, their spouse has the right unless some other guarantor is already in place.
Second story: I'm from Brazil and I must say: good riddance for OP because seems he avoided a girl who saw him and his country as some kind of exotic tropical paradise. It seems to be something of a common stupidity in US aswell: a few months ago there was a Virgin Airline ad for flights to the city of São Paulo;
The ad had the stereotypical 'carnaval' costumes and dances, and talked about the 'fabulous beaches' of São Paulo. I live in São Paulo. We are on top of the mountains, and the closest of a beach we have up here is anything but fabulous. And our climate is closer to NYC most of the time;
So yeah if OP's ex-fiancée based her entire relationship and view from OP's country on a stupid overproduced music video, and got mad at him when her own insistence on going there shattered her stupid stereotypical views, I'd say the gringo trash took out itself.
That was 100% a case of fetishization. Sorry if you know but just in case you don't, fetishization is pretty much when someone looks at a culture, country or race that's "exotic" to them, typically fixating on things like stereotypes/ bias/ generalization/ misinformation and heavily romanticizing and obsessing over those generalized traits.
Like for Brazilians, all the people who fetishize your culture only think of the celebrations and the beaches, dancing with a romantic and passionate "Mr.Tall dark and handsome" as he whispers Portuguese poems in her ear.
Or for Asian women, not even a specific country, just all Asian women are seen as childlike, hyper feminine, obedient and dutiful housewives.
These types don't see people, just the fantasy they've cooked up in their head.
Yeah, I can confirm since I'm from P.R., so much as going to some places puts you in high risk of something happening, and from what I know don't even try to take out your phone for a pic, unless is a guarded place but even then. If you want to see the location of the music video, just see some pictures of it, its safer for you.
What’s funny is that this isn’t an uncommon thing amongst Americans (me being one). You have anime obsessed weirdos fetishizing Japan, LGBTQ+ trying to say American is just as unsafe as the Middle East and they’d rather be over their, etc.
3rd story: OP should consider divorcing his lazy wife and marry Roy instead! 😆
That's what I'm thinking too 😂
And if they're not into each other, at least keep him around.
That’s what I said
"You get the car I get to keep Roy"
ROY’S OUR BOY!
The OP in the Parasite story seriously needs to get into therapy himself. He has been Connie's doormat for years, watching his wife collect pets and brother husbands for OP while simultaneously hoarding up their home. I can't believe someone would allow that to happen to themselves. OP needs to man up, get a lawyer, take his kids and get away from Connie. Don't worry about hurting her, she's already hurting herself and the OP. If nothing else, do it for the kids, they don't deserve to live that way.
"Do it for the kids" should be his mantra until this is done.
@@TheSuperTroutMan Yes! Every time he falters or starts to feel guilty, he needs to say it over and over again.
OP is a doormat
Actually, he's an abuse victim. She has been mentally, emotionally, and fincially abusing him for years (and quite possibly physically, knowing how these kinds of things are often played down by men in general). She also is a hoarder. She needs mental help as well. It sounds like she needs to be checked into a mental facility and OP needs to get a divorce while she is being treated - for his own and the kids safety. Joe can be kicked out, no harm no foul, because he hasn't been there long enough to claim any rights of tenancy or squatter's rights, but the other guy, Roy, could very well make claims as a tenant unless OP works something out. HOWEVER, if he and OP can get Connie into a mental health place, away from them, where she stops bleeding them dry and abusing BOTH of them, they may just see how bad their situation has been and mutually agree to cutting her off. It sounds like Roy may even be a friend to OP in the long run, if he can get away from the crazy too. Sometimes shared trauma does that.
Do what for the kids? He is expecting to let them live in this pandemonium, and see them on weekends.
So, yeah, hyperfocusing on random things and then getting something else IS a symptom of ADHD.
But you know what isn't?
Knowing you have it, being aware of the problems, and doing NOTHING about it!
My husband heard about the husband stitch and was horrified and disgusted. He couldn't understand how a man could be thinking about such things, especially after their SO just gave birth. He said he was so worried for me health and safety while I was getting stitched after tearing, sex was the furthest thing from his mind. Also, he understands that is just not how vaginas work.
That Connie story...yikes. OP needs to get those kids out of that house. The train of men coming through that house is not safe for them.
your husband was horrified and disgusted by the "husband stitch" because your husband loves you and thinks of you as a human being. men like OP's husband just see women as a sentient fuck toy that cleans their house, cooks their food, and takes care of their children.
The OBGYN in the first story should be sued for malpractice! Wtf?!?!?!?!
Sadly, probably the doctor offered it because in their country it isn't considered medical malpractice
It's unfortunately common
No, he shouldn't just be sued, he should be prosecuted for FGM and receive a life sentence without any chance of parole. This is an actual crime against humanity.
@@Lovuschka I get that it's disgusting, especially if done without the woman's consent, but you think one stitch constitutes a crime against humanity? Overreact much?
@@thechapLen FGM is a crime against humanity. There is no overreaction in that. It doesn't matter if it is done to children or adults, to one or a thousand.
"Hes extremely remorseful" no hes not. He was only thinking of himself and is only "sorry" because you didnt agree with him
Only “remorseful” because he’s no longer able to passionately hug his wife
@@andreajackson4138I’m sure he rapes her since he doesn’t seem to care about consent or his wife. I feel so bad for her and I hope she leaves him soon.
Story 1: He needs to understand that OP needs to consent for that. Heck, any surgery on OP needs consent from OP. Don't assume OP will be okay with it, because the opposite can happen, and then what?
Not really when your out of it the spouse has control in the situation
@@hardup9809nice bait mate
@@hardup9809 that is only if it is life saving measures IN most civilized countries. I am sure they were in one where the women have fewer rights.
@@samhainnc9416this was the case in the us just a few decades ago. Look up the love surgeon. James Burt. He invented this husband stitch. It’s disgusting. Performed it on thousands of woman (and worse) without their consent and he basically got away with it. Retired happily in Florida…
@@hardup9809Nah ur trolling, bugger off with that garbage.
I think story 3 should kick out her and joe and keep roy around. He can keep the house, kids, and rent a storage unit to put all her stuff in with a payment set up in her name with 6 months paid off for her to sort her own crap out.
Roy is a better stay-at-home-parent than his wife lol.
It's actually so disgusting of the husband to do that in the first story. I'm shocked actually, this is abuse by him
WHY IS THIS EVEN A THING???
Like seriously, this is gay conversion camps level of 18th century insanity...
EDIT: 3:48 "His Country"... third world country bs maybe, but jesus christ nonetheless...
Boohoo
At first I was like "well he didn't know", but then I realized the obvious answer:
He could have waited, explained it to his wife, and they could have decided together if that's something she wants to try, then SHE could get consentual cosmetic surgery.
Also every doctor that performs this procedure should be in jail.
You don't just get to decide to do random extra procedures on an unconscious patient, that's literally illegal!
@@Nerobyrneagreed!! This is something no one should do, and things like this get overlooked so often which is genuinely sad
The husband is a controlling idiot. This is a form of sexual abuse.
First Story: What happened to OP is beyond messed up. If this was in the US, the doctor would need permission from the ACTUAL patient before doing anything to their body. The fact that this doctor asked OP's husband for the husband's stitch all for his benefit is wrong
Second Story: So she called off the engagement because OP's home country wasn’t what she expected or hoped? If I was OP I’d see this as the red flag as it is. OP gave her warning after warning but she insisted on going; as soon as the trip wasn’t the way she fantasized she leaves OP?
Third Story: I honestly can’t feel sorry for OP. Connie literally admitted to having multiple online relationships while talking to OP and OP ended up marrying her. OP needs to grow a spine and kick them all out of HIS house. I feel for OP in having to deal with all of this but all of this would’ve been avoided if OP didn’t give her that second chance; now she became a human parasite and plans to take everything OP owns
1st story. Anything shy of life saving work correct. In the US they would need the patients permission. But something tells me the country they were in was probably where the husband has most the rights over his property IE: Wife.
Unfortunately the husband has more power than one would think in some US practices. I STILL hear of doctors persuading patients to wait to get their tubes tied, etc or even insisting they have the husband’s permission. I don’t know the legality countrywide or it’s a state by state thing, but sadly, this first story doesn’t surprise me.
I feel a bit sympathetic for OP, he’s just been beaten down so much and I’m glad that he is trying to leave her. I hope that he takes Roy cause he seems like a good guy and attempts to take care of the house
Sadly here in the US, the wife doesn't have to give consent to get the "husband stitch." Most male doctors will just do it.
@@Turbo_Waitress This wasn't in the US and no DR would do voluntary surgery or be sued on an adult without the patients permission. The consent forms for the husband to give permission is for life saving decisions only. Unless is has FULL power of attorney over his wife but even then most Dr's wont do voluntary work like that.
As a man who married a Puerto Rican woman: If OP's girlfriend based her entire idea of PR around that music video, she set herself up for disappointment, and that OP should be happy to be rid of her, because his homeland (and by proxy, he) will never live up to her expectations. When I went to PR, my wife and her family showed me the whole picture of the island. I saw the good and the bad. The younger generation, who were excited and joyful at the cultures blending, and seeing people from the mainland coming to visit, and the older generations where there is still distrust and blatant bigotry towards those who are 'Outsiders.' PR can be a major culture shock. As a general rule for anyone visiting a country that is not culturally similar to their own, a rule of thumb: If you saw that country in a movie, a show, or a music video, you need to push every preconception you have out of your mind, because you're not going to get any of that.
I knew from the start that OP and that he was talking about la Perla
I knew it immediately Op said the island was bad. It's crap all the youth is leaving for the states bad.
@@alexisgoss8063I’m finding it hilarious that her romanticized idea of PR and la Perla specifically being ruined was the reason she left her fiancé. Like everyone in PR would have told her to stay out of la Perla
@@jessieiseman agreed to infinity
Story 1: so my wife had our amazing little girl. And before the birth she told me about the “husband stitch” and I was just so grossed out that that is a thing. I would never force that on my wife or anyone for that matter.
I knew the husband stitch was a possibility for the first story. The vagina is not supposed to be some tight toy. Its supposed to be able to loosen and stretch. It will return to normal after the baby.
I remember over 40 years ago when my former wife and I were dating. We double dated with a soon to be doctor and his girlfriend when he explained what the “husband stitch” was. He was in medical school and sharing some stories about his classes. I didn’t believe him at first, I thought he was exaggerating. I thought it was weird then, and think it is weird now.
She's not in the US
Husband stitch? What CENTURY IS THIS?
It slowly coming back there are some tiktoks were husband "joke" bribe the doctors to get there wife a husband stitch for there own selfishness
There are also more nurses end doctor saying that there are more boyfriends and husbands asking if they can put a extra sticht because they want it tighter
The correct question is, what country is this?
Story 1: my mom was in surgery recently, she had a hysterectomy. I was temporarily the one making medical decisions for her. Her surgeon called mid-surgery to say they found a suspicious mass and wanted to biopsy it, but they needed my permission. Even for something potentially life saving, they couldn’t just do whatever they wanted.
OP’s doctor did an entire separate procedure on her AND NEVER MENTIONED IT, the nurses had to clue her in. Disgusting.
First story: I wouldn't trust a doctor who can get things done behind your back and without your consent.
That doctor needs to lose his license. Hubs needs to be made an EX. But, OP is in a bad situation, essentially trapped in a foreign country with brutal practises against women.
@@lancerevell5979 Dr won't lose it because it is perfectly legal in the country they were in it seems.
That's America.
@@IAmTheSkinThiefthey aren't in America
She stated femicide is a thing and that women don't have as many rights as men
Don't get me wrong America is trash but we don't for the most part kill female babies just for being girls and women don't lose rights to their own child just because they divorce and if a doctor does a husband stitch he can and should be reported and face consequences
@@IAmTheSkinThiefthat’s not America you do know it’s illegal and those types of practices are more common in France.
The first story... it is even worse if you know OP was a molestation victim as a child! He felt, knowing her past trauma as a child, she would think a husband stitch is okay. It's called a "husband" stitch for a reason. It ONLY benefits the man, which essentially is molestation all over AGAIN. Doing something to a woman for solely his benefit is the goal in both cases; sexual gratification. For a guy who is a doctor, it's really stupid thinking with complete disregard for his wife. Knowing childbirth was painful enough, he wanted to add onto that pain with extra stitches?! Are you kidding me? It added a mental toll even more than childbirth gave added onto the physical recovery of childbirth and being a new mother! WTF. The more I think about it, the more upset it makes me.
The husband stitch doesn't actually tighten anything down there either, idk how the idea circulated that more stitches means tighter. So it's a fully unnecessary procedure that only causes more pain
Omfg I've had actual nightmares about the husband stitch... Pregnancy and labor abuse is a serious and frighteningly common thing. The horror stories I've heard are part of why I don't want to have children. I completely don't blame OP for her reaction, and absolutely applaud her choices. It's disgusting on husband's part for approving that, and absolutely malicious on the doctor's part for even offering let alone doing it without the patient consent.
My ex-husband told me to ask my OB if it was possible to get extra stitches when I was pregnant with our first child. I actually did ask my OB and she gave me an incredibly WTF look and said NO. I should've seen the red flags then. That was just the start of him disrespecting me, my body and our kids.
Story 3: ADHD does include impulsiveness, but you still can't be excused from consequences involving impulsive behavior.
She is straight up walking over OP and he is just letting her because he doesn't want her feelings hurt. Problem is, she is definitely just pretending to have her feelings hurt because something didn't go her way
Sorry, OP, but you can't avoid hurting her feelings, you NEED to put your foot down, grow your spine, say no, divorce, take everything, and give the others the boot.
I have no faith in the OP getting their act together. As an adult he let a parasitic wife and strange man live in his home for 10 years.
Yeah, this is a super codependent, toxic relationship all around. Years and years of bad decisions and stupid rational.
Honestly makes me wonder what his life growing up was
Agree! ADHD person here, and while I struggle with such behaviors but I never let myself get away with such crap.
I seriously think the guys bunking in the spineless house has more backbone and decency than everyone else combined.
Story 2: I was thinking the same thing R/, how could she possibly claim to have loved you enough to want to get married but then end the relationship because your home country isn't the glamorous music video she thought it was? There is no place in the world that doesn't have bad things about it, honestly what OP describe happens in America too, but apparently she didn't know that. I understand OP is hurting right now, but if she's that shallow then at least you didn't waste money paying for the wedding.
Story 1: As someone with endometriosis (which often leads to having tight genitals) being tight has made my love life a living hell. Not for my partners of course, but every time I have s*x it burns and if my partner is just a tiny bit too rough I tear open. That husband is a monster and should be locked away.
As a guy, I totally don't understand your partners. Whenever my Lady Wife of 31years has experienced painful intercourse, as soon as she said "ouch!" or the equivalent, my body responded by me instantly not being able to perform. One time, it became painful for her during intercourse, but she didn't say anything as it wasn't that bad and she wanted me to finish. But apparently after (at the time) 20 or so years of marriage, I had learned to pick up on her body language, and my body responded appropriately.
I hope you find the kind of guy you deserve. Advice I give to folks going into relationships is, "Would you want to spend the rest of your life with your SO if you could never have s*x again?" If the answer is no, probably not going to work out long term.
@@ostlandr My current partner is great, and he is super careful. So it's not that painful at all anymore, but I have had previous partners who didn't care
Girl, get yourself some good lube!
Dude ive been trying to wxplain my pain and ive been thinking its endometriosis for years, you perfectly described my sex life and confirmed exactly what i needed to tell my doctors and also have me the confidence to keep pushing for a diagnosis. Thank you
Wait a minute, it can cause pain while having intercourse?? Well now i understand why i had problems with my ex.
The last story sounds like he has been psychologically abused, and I really hope he gets the help he needs for him and his children to live happily ever after without his wife.
Tbh the fact that the OBGYN even thought to ASK to do that, is absolutely egregious and he should be reported to the proper authorities! What’s worse is “the husband stitch” doesn’t even work! The “tightness” of the vag comes from the strength of the pelvic floor muscles, so no amount of stitching can actually make you tighter. And while yes the vag DOES expand during childbirth, it eventually shrinks back to how it was before the delivery. A husband stitch can actually make it so that sex is PAINFUL for both the the woman AND the man, because the woman can no longer stretch enough to accommodate a penis without it being painful, and by extension it can be painful for the man because the penis is now being squeezed too much. I work in healthcare, so stories like this are particularly sickening to me. I hope OP can escape with her baby and get FAR away from that monster of a man. Imagine prioritizing the possibility of more sexual pleasure over the safety and comfort of someone who is supposedly the love of your life.
"Proper authorities" here would be the International Criminal Court in The Hague, for crimes against humanity.
Not the authorities in his shithole country that has no women rights.
Who is she going to report anything to? She's not in America. I really don't think King Saud gives a fuck about her
@@wingracer1614 I think it was only in the last ten years or so that the high council of Imams or whatever ruled that women are human. That is not a joke or an exaggeration.
Story 3: OP you weren’t “young and in love”, you were “young and stupid.” And now, you’re old and still stupid.
You're completely right. This is quite possibly the most spineless person featured on this channel for far.
Something tells me OP comes from money and is living off of an inheritance or trust fund the way he flippantly brushes off all the financial stuff
@@Tortilla.Reform I didn't get that impression. He made it clear that they need to be careful with their finances and he's talking like a measly $60k mortgage is like some huge and worrying amount of money.
I think he's just always worked and supported everyone because he doesn't mind doing so because he's a doormat.
I never expected rslash to endorse gambling
That last story... That parallels way too much of my first marriage, holy crap! Eight years in I finally got some real friends outside our relationship, and they showed me what a real life is like. Then after a blow out fight where she attacked me for the last time, I finally got out.
Here's my question. Why is it the HUSBAND'S choice to get the stitch done on a body that isnt even his, and not, you know, THE WOMAN'S choice. Considering SHE is the patient and its HER body. Why are women still treated like its the 1800s and that they are the property of their husbands/boyfriends? I would absolutely be talking to a lawyer, filing complaints, etc. Because it should NEVER have been the guys choice to modify the womans body WITHOUT HER CONSENT!!!
Because in some countries, they still are...
So no one has told you about a medical proxy?
In most cases that's going to default to your spouse if you're unable to.
They're literally the ones who will decide whether or not you have body parts lopped off instead of trying to live with it.
The same would be true if she had been the one awake and him being operated on unless he specified someone else.
Time to grow up.
@@RunicSigils
But this is only for necessary medical procedures. The Husband Stitch isn't necessary. It's cosmetic and only for the husband, hence the name.
@@RunicSigilsyou don’t understand how it works it’s when you can’t make the choice and it involves life or death or medical necessary decisions also it’s typically when the partner is unconscious is is very unlikely to wake up nor temporarily wake up. Like by your logic getting your spouse drunk and raping them is okay. Do you think marital rape is okay too? Absolutely disgusting.
@@RunicSigils that's not at all what happened here. Medical proxy is for necessary procedures; a husband stitch is entirely elective. Definitely not the sort of thing a man should subject his wife to without her consent.
OMG, the danger the children are in, in the final story, is crazy. They know nothing about these 2 men they have living with them. These overly helpful dudes who are doing your dishes and yardwork out of the goodness of their hearts? Don't trust them. You hear so many horror stories about 'family friends' abusing kids and this whole situation is a breeding ground for something like that to happen. If OP doesn't respect himself, he should at least want to protect his kids.
Would you say the same if it where women?
Story 1 what a violation of trust. I'm surprised she didn't divorce him. Also how comical that he suggested counseling. Op shouldn't have to fix what she didn't break.
Op doesn’t live in the USA and is financially dependent on him, and medically since she just had a baby. She said that she started some freelance work because if she divorced him after she was discharged he would get full custody. When it comes to divorce you have to be smart.
it's likely they live in Iran. this sounds like common practice in the middle east, I think.
She is trapped. Sounds like divorce means she is screwed, so it isn't surprising she didn't go that way.
He may have suggested the counseling because *he* wanted to try to fix things. That said, there really is no coming back from this because he had a surgical procedure done without her knowledge or consent. That's beyond a red flag; that's more like a red tarp!
It’s much worse than a violation of trust
Its so infuriating how everyone want op to forgive her husband for 1 mistake. Sure it's one mistake but that mistake was physically altering your wife bruh. It's flipping painful and you want forgiveness.
Yeah like would they tell a man who had his penis chopped off and fed to the dog that he needs to forgive his wife for chopping off his penis and testicles and destroying them so they couldn’t be put back on? I bet they wouldn’t.
He doesn't deserve forgiveness. He consented to the genital mutilation of his wife for his own pleasure just after she gave birth to his child. He's not remorseful, he just wants back in her bed.
I just KNEW Dabney was gonna go OFF on the last story, also missing the puppy bloopers with Yugo❤
Imagine getting an husband stitch for your unconscious wife then losing the right to perform the act pertaining to that procedure. That being said op should be able to sue the doctor and divorce her husband.
Not in OP's husband's country apparently.
Story 2: As a fellow puertorican, I can say for certain that this island is a beautiful place to visit, but if you're not familiar with the place you have to be extremely careful on where you go. The more touristy a place is the more dangerous it is around here. Though as long as you travel with someone who knows the whereabouts and follow thier advice it's pretty much as safe as any other place.
Reminds me of that song "America" from "West Side Story."
Yep, I went with my moms (we are all from yauco, Puerto Rico located in the south west of the island for any foreigners)advanced Spanish to la Perla the year despasito came out and I guided a group of 5 12th graders to photograph the bowl and we went in and out in less than five minutes respectfully. No one was injured or otherwise. So yeah Puerto Rico is beautiful just don't be a dumb idiot wanting to offend.
Omg when i saw the thumbnail & title i was like “OH GOD!!!!😳😳”
Last Story: Stop being a doormat!! Why did you let her bring two strange men around your DAUGHTER? You're nothing but a ATM to her. Please update!
Story 3: How did OP allow all of this nonsense for over a decade? 😳 I’m speechless.
There's a lot that can factor into it. Probably had a terrible upbringing and never learned the proper way that he should be treated, as an individual. And then people like his wife, pray upon guys who are like that and basically leave them feeling hopeless and alone.
And as someone with ADHD, it's offensive that she's self diagnosed and blames everything on it. Refusing to see someone about it, means she knows it's bullshit and she doesn't want to find another excuse for her actions. She makes it hard for people with actual ADHD to get proper help and tiktok has made it soo much worse.
@@ZammyBirdProductions Well said. Agreed.
i'll tell ya. trauma and abuse. that shit ruins a person
rSlash, it's called "The Husband Stitch" for a reason, the actual patient is *never* consulted for it.
Glad I now know this is a thing and what it means. So if I ever have a pregnant wife/gf that gives birth and the doctor suggests it I know to say NO! (and probably report later IDK)
Sad that the roommates contribute more than Connie.
On a related note: some people just can't be fixed, you'd on only destroy yourself in the process. The same thing almost happened to my brother in his first relationship; the girl still has no idea how close she was to being destroyed for what she put him through.
I can't believe the husband stitch is still a thing.
The "husband stitch" is one of the many reasons why you should have a doula present when giving birth
I have a buddy just like OP in the last story (minus the "friends" staying with them) and he really doesn't see the issue with his wife doing absolutely nothing. She doesn't work, cook, clean, raise their kid, or take care of anything. She just plays video games all day. I almost want to say she baby-trapped him.
Doctors can't be disbarred, by the way. That's for lawyers. Doctors lose their medical licenses.
So glad you’re still uploading. Used to listen to you all the times I’d mow my lawn. Saved me from the boredom 😂
Story 3 : OP is incredible stupid... no back bone, "I can fix her!" Spoiler No, you can't, only professionals can help her manage and if she doesn't want to then is a waste of time and sanity.
He is unfixable. Not sure why he thinks he is capable of fixing anyone. He just has filler words to semi convince himself he is strong.
One can never "fix" a partner. Like Granddad said, "You can't free a fish from water."
Oof. Story 1 is awful. My husband and I got together as teens still, so I didn’t fault him when he asked me about that type of thing and if I was considering anything like that when we were expecting our first. He asked because he didn’t know, and when I explained it he became team “Why would anyone do that?”.
Wow…story #3 is giving me huge flashbacks to my worst ex. Thankfully I never married her or had a kid with her, but she did try to baby trap me a few times, and literally in every single other regard my ex was just like Connie. I feel so hard for OP here. That said, OP does really need to grow a backbone, kick the guys out, and leave Connie. Otherwise this is gonna get so much worse for him.
Connie sounds like my first girlfriend in some ways. Complete and utter lack of anything approaching common sense. I didn't dodge a bullet when we split up- I dodged a tactical nuke. At least I had backbone enough to tell her no while we were dating.
story 1: I wonder if there is a way to have this reversed with surgery. Sounds like these men are only thinking about their lower halves and not their better halves.
I've heard of people having it reversed, sadly doctors have been known to do it without speaking to either partner. This was a long time ago thankfully, enough got sued to mostly put an end to it.
Rslash seems like a better father than mine. He would rent out rooms in the house we rented. At one point there were 16 people living there. And we shared one bathroom
Every single one of these stories made me angry in some capacity. I LOVE RSLASH CONTENT
If he’s as remorseful as you claim, he would undergo chemical castration as penitence
Actually that’s much less severe than what he did as the husband stitch causes lifelong pain and health problems.
Not the same thing, and everyone is acting as if this story took place in the US. It didn't. Everyone in the world doesn't have the same viewpoints as the US. There are several countries that do consider women as 2nd class citizens. OP willingly moved there and is now crying about the situation. You don't marry and move to a country where you don't know the laws and what that societies viewpoints are on the rights of women. It it's the country i suspect it is, these viewpoints are VERY well known. This should have been expected.
@@wendymaldonado3007 it still doesn’t make what happened to her any less wrong and she/‘s still very much a victim.
@@mwokozi It's a consequence for living where she chose to live. Americans especially do this. They move to a foreign country thinking, "I'm an American, their laws won't affect me. They need to treat me the same as I'm treated in America. My rights are the same as if I'm living in America". No, they don't. If you willing live there, you are agreeing to accept their treatment of you, especially if its a country where they DO treat women as 2nd class citizens. She is a victim of her own expectations if she thought marrying a rich surgeon would afford her any exceptions. She would be a victim here in America but she isn't there. She is also lucky if he has been respecting her enough not to try to force her to have sex, because again if this is the country I suspect it is, it wouldn't be considered rape to force her to have sex with her husband.
@@wendymaldonado3007 no matter what she’s a victim because of the men there being absolute garbage people also how do you know she didn’t move from another country with horrible treatment towards women?
Story 2 sounded like Puerto Rico, and then they mentioned a music video. I knew it! They warned her, but she didn't listen...
OP def needs to get a push from his mates and his fam. Sometimes even though you know you need to take the right step, you have to get a push from someone else. Maybe he doesn't believe he has a right to stop her, maybe it's something else idk. But yeah he's gotta learn that he deserves better and has to choose better.
i was asked by the doctor when my child was born, i cussed them and every other member of the hospital staff out. raised hell.
As someone who had their va jay jay stitched wrong with my first child, it fucking hurts!!! We couldn't have intercourse for months and it still hurt a lot. When I got pregnant again, they were shocked when they saw it, they got a higher up in to look, look through my files to find who did it and fired them.
To describe it, I had to have an episiotomy, so that had to be stitched, then I had a little bit of opening, like maybe a millimetre, then stitched a little bit and then the rest of my opening. So as you can imagine it was awful. And no, my husband didn't ask for it, the woman just did it
Ouch! Your story made my toes curl. You poor thing.
@@It-is-me...Melsie if that made your toes curl, wait for this one.
Just had our third in may this year, had to have an epidural because little madam was trying to force herself out while I wasn't dilated enough. They got a woman in to do it and she was just rude as hell, refused to do her own tray and made the miswives do it, they didn't like her very much so they got the matron to come in too, 7 attempts and she still couldn't do it and kept giving me severe contractions. My partner ended up shouting at her and just telling her to leave and get someone else because he had lost confidence in her, I was in such pain, screaming, crying and the midwives were peeved as hell. Got the male one to come do it and he was just like "bam, done, lay back and relax" same hospital too
@@KittyKix26 Oh good grief! I must say though, once the epidural kicks in, what a relief.
@@It-is-me...Melsie oh it was a sweet ass relief 😂 then she arrived in 20 minutes 😂
Plz tell me I'm not the only one who thought at first the husband was the obgyn surgeon and he did the husband stitch to her while she was asleep in their home.....
I had that same mental image going into that story, the thumbnail made it look like that was going to be what it was.
First story: first story of this video, but not the first story I’ve heard about the “husband stitch.” Isn’t it illegal in the US to even consider doing this? Idk, but it sounds horrifying.
And yes, I’m sure OP isn’t in the US, but still. Doesn’t mean it’s not horrifying.
It is in fact illegal.
@@charleerain1936Yes, in the US, but, likely not in whatever country Op is in
@@Tokuijin i'm not finding much helpful information
@@charleerain1936 Op mentions that "femicide" is a common enough occurrence, so that should narrow it down
@@Tokuijin True. Fair point.
Looking at the title, I immediately knew the story that was going to be read. In short, OP's husband was a complete moron and made a change to HER BODY without her consent, and in a way that immediately impacts her comfort while simply existing.
Or he was selfish and malicious. There’s sadly too many men who are willing to put their selfish interests over the wellbeing of their partner.
@@mwokoziI think his friend probably exaggerated/lied to him about the procedure before doing it. That doesn't make it right, and OP has every right to her feelings as well as ending their relationship over this. From the brief snippets of the conversation between the husband and GYNO it sounds like the GYNO just tried to convince him to do it. Saying it'd be harmless and would make the sex better for them after the birth.
Then, this absolute dumbass of a husband, not questioning what he was told at all, just decided that it sounded like a good idea. I can understand why he got defensive afterwards when OP said he'd violated her by agreeing to it without her consent ASSUMING that he was made to believe what he told her: that it wouldn't cause any problems and would make their sex lives better after the birth. However, just because I understand why he'd get upset about the accusation doesn't mean that I disagree with her.
I think the GYNO is the one truly in the wrong here at the end of the day, and the husband is a moron who thought his neurosurgeon degree meant he knew better than his wife about work WAY outside his field. I hope she gets help.
@@DoctorOaks oh no the husband is also malicious and in the wrong. It takes an whole new level of selfishness and cruelty to make a major and unnecessary medical decision on another person’s body without their consent.
@@mwokozi I'm not excusing what he did. I'm saying that he could be an idiot who believed what his friend told him, and went along with it. I don't think she should forgive him, but I also think that (judging by what she said about the country they're in) it may have never occurred to him that it would be wrong to say yes on her behalf.
She has every right to be upset. She has every right to leave him. She has every right to blame him. That doesn't mean that he was necessarily malicious, but it's still HIS fault for agreeing.
I personally think it's way more on the GYNO though for even recommending, advocating for, and going through a procedure like this without the patient's permission.
@@DoctorOaks he understood what it was for (supposedly tightening the vagina to make tight for his little penis however it doesn’t really work) yet it is going to obviously hurt her with no benefit. Also it’s not rocket science and a neurosurgeon like him should be able to understand the basics of the human body. He also proved that he’s at at best an inconsiderate selfish moron who doesn’t deserve to have a medical license much like his friend because he doesn’t understand the basics of the human body and he lacks critical thought but he’s selfish and inconsiderate for making a decision that’s medically unnecessary for his benefit at her expense.
I FUCKING knew it was gonna be a Husband Stitch
My god that last story ... that dude is a lost cause, he's let his wife walk all over him for decades.
Story1: I legit have no idea on how to move forward from that. I would look at my partner with a side eye forever.
That last story: OMG! The wife is a hoarder. She hoards junk and guys. My guess is that she’ll keep getting into relationships with other guys, invite them to live with her, and move onto the next one. She’s making a reverse harem, and OP just hasn’t seen it yet.
The fact that the husband who stitched his wife privates didn't see this coming is insane to me. The final story is so wild I have to believe it is true.
Does anyone feel iffy about R slash taking a sponsorship from a litteral gambling company? First Betterhelp, now this?!
rSlash making a gambling ad was not on my Bingo card for this year lol
The guy with the parasite wife needs to grow a backbone, Jesus Christ. Dude is being constantly manipulated and he’s just… given up, accepted this behaviour, and refuses to stand up for himself. His kids live in an extremely unstable household and he won’t even consider putting them first.
Omg the last story. WTF is wrong with that man?! He needs a serious kick in the butt, get some much needed therapy, and to get the strange men away from his kids!
If those kids suffered any abuse from the men or his wife he would be 100% at fault for not protecting them. All I could think of in the beginning of the story was "please don't have kids with that woman" and OP did.
Story one reaffirms my decision to want a c section when I have a child. My partner wouldn’t make the Decision for me to get a husband stitch without my consent but still don’t even want that possibility
Story three is so crazy that it almost seems unreal!! Y the heck did OP marry and procreate with this absolute trash human?! She didn’t need marriage, she needed therapy and medication! The fact she doesn’t see anything wrong with her obvious issues is wild to me
If u live developed country it shouldn’t be an issue. If u don’t… being knocked out for a c section may not be any safer. At least ure still conscious the other way…
There sre many complications also with c sections. Do your research.
I thought the husband stitch was like an urban legend lol I only had c sections so i never had to deal with any of that.
Unfortunately it isn't. My late husband's sister had this done to her by her ex-husband & her doctor 24 years ago. When she planned on leaving him, he stealthed her to get pregnant with their youngest so she ended up staying a few more years. After I found out what happened, I freaked the ef out at the hospital admin & had the doctor fired, the hospital decided it was in their best interest to fix it & they did so right after their youngest was born. We live in a smallish town (2700 people) so the hospital flew in an actual decent plastic surgeon & he ended up doing a reconstruction of that area for no charge to her (the hospital paid him & every other cost associated they ate).
Yeah, same. I thought it was a disgusting joke made by sexist men. Was HORRIFIED to hear that story.
One problem the husband in the last story may have, is removing these guys. My ex-husband was always bringing strays home. “They’ll only be here a few days”, he would say. One time this really backfired, and after several months, after the “honeymoon period”, my husband was ready for him to leave. He refused. It was at that time that we found out, there is something called squatters rights. We were informed by the police that, we would have to take him to court to make him leave. Especially, since they have lived in OP’s house for this long, it will probably be a long process 😢.
For the last story - Divorce and keep Roy. He at least contributes.
dude the lack of backbone of op in the third story is so big that im surprised he is able to stand up
You want to feel bad for the guy in the last story, but from the very beginning and at every turn he made it basically impossible.
Last Story: Yeah…i gotta agree with r/slash this dude NEEEEDS to grow a spine…
He’s let his wife push him around for YEARS, she is a toxic, manipulative cheater (cmon we all know shes sleeping with at least one of these guys) and Op is letting her do it.
Man rslash promoting gambling is the last thing I expected from him.
Hey, it's legal, and separating "Jock Sniffers" from their money is incredibly easy. Gambling aside, they'll pay insane money for clothes with the Swoosh on them, or for a team jersey. And they'll take out a second mortgage for an autographed ball or jersey. LOL I literally see these geniuses running around in Winter in Upstate NY wearing nothing but a team jersey, and gym shorts and sneakers with the Swoosh on them.
This was one of the very few times I was actually going to make a comment, about this exactly. Pretty surprising to see him accept a sponsor for a gambling platform.
I think OP needs to marry Roy ... lol
P.S
OP is also an idiot. What is it going to take for OP to come to his senses?!
Bankruptcy, CPS taking the kids, and living in a cardboard box in an alley apparently. And maybe not even then.
I’m cracking up at the girl who wanted to go to La Perla bc of the desposito music video💀💀💀
"making it tighter" is insane. He didn't think "oh wait, will this be painful for my wonderful wife who JUST GAVE BIRTH TO OUR CHILD" no, he first thought of naughty time. That is a husband that doesn't care about you truly, sees you as some sexual object. He didn't consider anything except naughty time. That is disgusting. Poor wife.. she just had that man's child and that is what he decides??
21 years ago my wife and I had our first child. His head got stuck and they had to do an emergency C section to get him. He was born not breathing, and was sent to another hospital. The Dr. was NOT good. My mind was in a whirl. My wife in one hospital, my son in another 25 miles away. The next morning I was with my wife in her room. The Dr. came in and said, "if she just kept pushing longer she could have had him", I was so mad! He would have been dead! Anyway, he followed that up with, "oh, I put in a 'papa stitch' for you". All I could say was "OK" I was confused, did not even know what that meant. My mind was just in so many places at once. It never caused any problems for her or I, but he never asked either of us. At the time it was the least of our worries. Looking back now, he was in the way wrong.
Connie story-I hate to be a victim blamer, but 9 years of this ends up being on OP at that point! Connie is no longer the problem here
Just a little note for you r/slash. The kind of sponsor you got for today is considered to be gambling in my country, even if it doesn't look like it at first. While it might not be illegal for you to advertise such an app, I still wanted to warn you about such apps. They can lead to addictions, costing people their lives.
The fact that a husband stitch even EXISTS is already disgusting, but the fact that OP's husband consented to something being done on HER body without HER permission, is absolutely revolting and both he and the doctor deserve jailtime. I don't know if the doctor can get their medical license revoked because of this, especially cause of the laws in her country, but I feel like they do not deserve to operate on people anymore.
Story #1: LEAVE HIM!!!!! SUE THAT BASTARD!! Better yet, Accidents can and usually do happen!
How is she going to sue anyone? She has no rights in whatever hell hole this took place in.
@@wingracer1614 Did you read the part where it said "Accidents" can happen??😏
@@yvonnefobbs6232 I did and if she is one of the countries I suspect she is in, that may be her only option
A husband stitch can make sex painful for the wife and has no benefit for the woman it is literally just for the husband
It's really dangerous to have strange men living around your children like that. It is one of the most likely times for kids to be molested. Like seriously you might have seriously fucked up your kids forever.
Connie sounds like Eric Cartman - "Whatever! Whatever! I do what I want!"
I know a girl JUST LIKE OP’s wife in story 3. Literally one of the most toxic people I have ever had the misfortune of knowing. She paints herself as a victim, but truly she is only a victim of her OWN actions. She excuses her behavior on mental health issues, jumps from one guy to another, and systematically destroys their lives. Each man she touches is a victim of her manipulation and destructive behaviors.
She painted one as a physically abusive man, who stole their things and ran off after she went to get a restraining order. When really, she drove him insane, he grabbed his things, and ran off.
What she failed to mention, she made friends via online gaming, and she flirted with one of them IN FRONT of the guy she was dating and living with. When she was left alone and couldn’t afford rent (can’t hold a job, jumps from one educational course to another subsiding on student loans, hyper fixation on things she could NEVER maintain, AND 3 CATS come with her)….she told her sad story to her new online man, who opened his home states away.
She packed up and zoomed off to live with him and his male roomie. The roomie got fed up with her bs and took off. And eventually, she found another online friend…flirted with him IN FRONT of the new guy too…
Eventually she met this new guy at a hotel (yes, to fuck) and her bf caught her. She denied everything despite the evidence being rock solid against her. Bf left her as soon as he could break the lease on the apartment, and she moved in with this new guy…
I should mention, her father called her a hoe for moving in with a total stranger and basically cut her off. She paints her mother as emotionally abusive and cruel, but I see her Venmo history…constantly getting money from her mother for groceries, bills, etc…
TO TOP IT OFF…this new guy? Is 19, working as a bagger at a grocery store (where min wage is WAY LESS than $15/hr)…and SHE is 35! And the cherry on top? She had a baby with this kid…Still no job, still nothing going for her. She has guaranteed the destruction of her new man’s life, and that of her baby…
The first story is one of the reasons why I dont trust male OBGYN. Im feeling for this poor woman
I hope to GOD OP reports her surgeon and leaves her husband. It may be "only one mistake" but that mistake is the size of the Red Spot on Jupiter (roughly 10,000 miles so big af) if he honestly thought an extra stitch would in ANY way benefit OP, then he should not be a doctor. He's making medical calls on his incredibly incorrect opinion. What would have happened if it was a life-threatening surgery and he put in his 2-cents, causing OP to die? What if the roles were reversed? I very much doubt he'd be pumped and ready to get fucked A) in a recent surgery area B) have the possibility of tearing the "beloved husband stitch" and C) have absolutely zero say on whether or not he even had to stitch in the first place. He, his family and the doctor can go skydiving into the same Red Spot as above with no parachutes, space suit, just in their birthday suits. Good luck, OP!
Who is she going to report it to? I doubt King Saud gives a shit
True, I keep thinking OP is based in the states. It's seriously unfortunate that there are still places where shit like this is just another Tuesday
That guy married to Connie, I can sort of understand his position on the house and car. I was so over my cheating ex, that I was willing to just let them have everything, if it meant getting away.
First story: Physicians aren't disbarred. They don't have a fancy for when they loose the right to practice. They just loose their license.
It's lose moron and loose is why there's a husband stitch in the first place.