We Broke Them Down And Built Them Back Up In Our Tactical Empathy Training!
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- čas přidán 9. 01. 2020
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Stop asking questions that get nowhere. Try using Labels & Mirrors, two of the foundational Black Swan negotiation skills. What do they look like in action? Chris and Derek put them to the test during this hands-on example at one of our Tactical Empathy seminars. Check it out!
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About The Black Swan Group
Founded and led by former lead FBI negotiator, Chris Voss, the Black Swan Group has 10+ years of experience working with companies and individuals on taking their negotiation skills to the next level. Chris’ book, Never Split the Difference, is a Wall Street Journal bestseller and has sold over 2 million copies worldwide. Our expert team of coaches discuss everything from silence techniques to influential empathy.
Connect with The Black Swan Group
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Thanks for watching!
It seems like you guys are really great at leveraging these mirroring and labeling techniques
These labeling techniques? hahaha
Very good...
Nice one
@@bepskekaatje424 seems like you enjoyed the video lol
@@sofly2455 enjoyed the video?
One of the most valuable videos I've ever seen. Why? Because it gave me a picture of HOW to practice these skills every day. I tried that and it is working so well! Thank you very much The Black Swan Group.
You seem passionate about practicing these skills every day...
@@dawid_dahl *said with jedi hand gesture*
YEAH IT WAS REALLY EYE OPENING HOW EASILY CONVERSATION CAN FLOW.
in some places if u ask them and they don’t want to give any attention on your questions,how do you cope with
one of the most valuable videos?
Seems like the most challenging part for those who participated is listening, and responding under pressure
Use labels based on the person you're talking to. If the person is animated when they talk, you'd say, "Looks like...." if they are very still, possibly even talking in a quiet voice, you'd say, " Sounds like....."
Great advice! Thanks
If the person is analytical "seems like"
It seems like you are familiar with the finer points of labels.
It sounds like you are an trainer yourself?
@@MoritzvPoser do not ask questions just label and mirror lol
I love how the guy wanted to know what Shirley was and the speaker corrected him and yet he was still able to get what he wanted just by using a technique
It seems like you see a powerful practical value in this technique or is it rather the charismatic trainer who makes it work?
Came back to this a year later, stuff is life changing
@@robertsullivan9232 wow, life changing
It helps to be very clear about what the intention is behind these techniques. Once the intention is clarified the techniques become a lot more natural and easy to use. To me, the intention behind these techniques is to deeply understand what the other person thinks and feels, and to draw out as much information as possible. Learning to comfortably sit inside that intention, or learning to make that intention real to you, is where the power and creativity comes in. I've seen this while selling. Once I shifted my intention from "executing the techniques" to "deeply understanding in order to do what is in the client's best interest", my techniques were given "life" and the impact was 100X
To Understand and to develop rapport…
EXACTLY!!!
This is an amazing video. Please keep content similar to this coming.
Thanks for sharing the exercise of mirrors and labels. Then following up with what you can learn about others!
The two What Questions are really the key to the floodgates. Then dance along with labels and mirrors and enjoy a great conversion with anyone! Great content!
It Seems it Sounds aside….
Shirley brought fuking tears to my eyes.
I think for me the takeaway is, while it’s good to be mindful of the techniques, it’s even more important to approach our relationships with a genuine open heart, looking for a win win.
Great workshop exercises! Thanks for sharing!
Thank youvery much Chris, Brandon and Derek...
Wow. This is amazing listening skills
Great video. Please show more demonstrations of the different techniques mentioned in the book.
Your ‘ShP!T’ is AWESOME!!!... Thank You ALL (Derek, Brandon & Chris) for it!!!...
The guys in your team are pretty great.. full of confident giving the feeling of professionalism.
Thank you for the value. I read your book as well but those videos just put reminders in my head way better.
Really valuable info you can put to use straight away, loved this!
This was amazing.
I've made this comment on a different video, but use these techniques in your next CL, marketplace, etc negotiation. They work. Also another great technique from the book is, if you really have to give a number first, use a range, not a hard number.
Excellent video Chris.
Invaluable lesson...thank you.
thanks for sharing this part because its a practical example
I learned something and I was touched deeply by what Derek said.
I watched the video 2x to understand, it's valuable. thanks.
This is excellent!
Amazing demonstration
im scaredly amazed.
Thanks for sharing this video.
This is so helpful.
Good stuff right here
Awesome! I gotta sign up for one of these!!!
This is Amazing
This was a great lesson training
This is a great coaching video had I’ve been there I would’ve said, “ it feels like you want to make me cry” when you told the heart wrenching story about little girl.
I think it was important for Derek to explain how being asked those questions made him feel. The people doing the labelling and mirroring did a great job BUT I would like to understand more about how L&M helped to move Derek down the line of the Sale.
Wow .. that’s very powerful
This is pure gold Derek ❤ and Chris. Thank you!
Glad you enjoyed it!
Great class
Thanks for the demo, i knew about mirrors, but labels was new :-)
...
it looks like great content that can help a lot of people. From introverts to business people, you guys inspire and teach them all.
It looks like you said a label (it looks like)
That was golden
Wow. Great skill I should put this into practice. I'm now reading Never Split The Difference.
Greg I was referring to the use of labels and mirrors my daily life as practice. Brushing up for when I really need it.
Very good!!
Thank you awesome😊😁😊
Just using labels and mirrors, when he was done... I was almost crying.
I been using this my entire life without even knowing it.... now i know why even my friends dont know much about me
hahahaha i feel youuu
love the profile pic.. do you really use IE?? haha
Change that profile pic. Lol, never mind I get it. Explore away.
Amazing
It sounds like after watching this video this skill would have a tremendous amount of value in people’s lives if only they were aware
Thanks for this demo. I'm struggling, and was encouraged to see others working through the same obstacles I am ;) The guy thinking to turn question into label while in the spot light - I FELT THAT. 💙
You feel that?
Practice makes perfect
Perfect practice makes perfect
10 years in 7 days challenge lesgo 😤
I can get behind the cohort spirit thing and the reps. Good social influences seem to be a thing here.
It looks like I’m using the technique very well.
Gold 💰
Great tools for helping teachers work with parents and students.
With parents and students?
It seems like you learned something from this?
Thank you so much for making this video. I have read your book and have learned a lot from it.
This is a great practical way to help you understand the effects of using labels and mirrors. It puts a lot of what you learned into perspective.
It seems the usage of labels and mirrors is deployed after asking a calibrated question to get things started. You would then peel your counterpart like an onion, layer after layer.
But let's suppose your counterpart isn't very articulate, isn't comfortable with talking about themselves, or just don't know themselves very well. At some point during the conversation, they put up a wall and start giving you very short answers.
How would you know if it is the right time to transition to calibrated questions or to keep using labels and mirrors?
after reading Never split a difference by Chris Voss this videos are like taking exercising to get a muscle great video by the way
Great point, sounds like you've been practicing?
Awesome material,testosterone filled demonstration. Great supplement to the book. It ties a lot together
It ties a lot together? See what I did there. :D
@@KyleMart Seems like you think you've got it all figured out huh? 😂 See what I did there?
I've tried it in my kid: Mirror and labels. And it did make her engage more in talking. Just yes or no, repeat the mirror or slight broader responses but nothing more expansive. I suppose I need more practice but also does not work on private people, or people that aren't naturally very talkative and sharing. My kid is like not mean or defensive. Happy, and private kid that thinks no further.
My children and husband are similar but if you use the different techniques some stick and some don't but I think with practice we'll see more success. Try asking the 2 what questions first then label and mirror or mirror then label...😊
Great
I can’t believe this content is free.
It seems like I need to look at more of these videos.
More of these videos?
It seems important to you
Passion-reason--mirroring
Gold!
Thank you!!
Your son sounds EXACTLY like you!
It sounds like i can learn alot of this
It seems like you've learned alot of this
This is great, the audience didn't seem to understand they were to state if the statement was a label or a mirror.
The audience wasn’t supposed to state if it was a label or a mirror, he was telling them “respond to me with a label or a mirror”. It was confusing for sure and I would have been like a deer in headlights until i caught on. he should actually change the way he does that.
It seems like the black swan group is very passionate about helping others use labels.
Labels are just one of the many skills and techniques that we use in the Black Swan Method. There are also different types of Labels as well. If you are interested in finding how these skills can elevate your communication skills check out our catalog! Thanks for watching!
Im having issue’s differentiating between , “Labeling” and an “Accusation audit”
May I please have help with this?
Labels and mirrors? It souds very important to you that we undestand how to connect to people
It seems like, you got the core message
Core message?
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
how different would the experience and/or effectiveness be in different cultures?
Virtual Gold here.
Sounds like you were a savior in Shirley's early life
Interesting
Mmmm! Boy o' boy I'm going to make so many business deals
what is a counter to labeling and mirroring?
Yo that one guy that took over as the negotiator 4minnutes in sounded just Voss in his word choice
He works with Chris Voss and his son. They teach this together.
Word choice is the whole point of what they're trying to teach.
If you phrase your "questions" as mirrors and labels instead, you get TONS more information out of the other person. It makes them want to tell you their life story pretty much.
@Greg Brown Yes, you see, when I was eight, I really wanted that bicycle for Christmas...
(Omg, did you just do it to me?)
They're basically like "good, someone is finally letting me talk goddamnit"
it sounds like labels and mirrors techniques are easy and effective skill that everybody can enjoy.
Absolutely!
How do you get the late night DJ voice to work? When I try to use a deeper, lower voice, my voice naturally wants to be that joyful encouraging higher pitched voice. So when I try to correct that and use a downward deflecting voice, it sounds like I’m Bane from Batman scolding someone. I’ve tried it hundreds of times now
idk...is the walking around the room putting their hands in their inside pocket looking like mafia part of the technique? Chris puts me at ease. Brandon and Derek make me nervous.
Great skills and definitely implement it this in my conversions..:. Actually they are AMAZING skill..
That being said . The demo conversation they had sounded a bit ridiculous after about the third label. If youre constantly “labeling “ and “mirroring” in a conversation the person is going to realize that you’re just repeating yourself and that are basically following a formula. So don’t be that one that one lol
Actually they don't realize if you do it skillfully, they just think you are listening closely and paying attention. People LOVE to talk about themselves.
@@CFinch360 You are right about doing it skillfully. I've picked up on it before, maybe because I have learnt the skill myself and so I easily notice it when somebody else is attempting to use it on me. Moderation like everything else
Where did you get the 63 repetitions to become a skill?
It seems like, it sounds like l, it feels like.
It seems like your a very Impactful individual. It sounds like you really care about..
It feels like you really know how to support them that are down trodden…
whats going on with the number 63
I cant wait to try this shit out on someone
Guys do they have a book about this stuff? Maybe translated in Italian (o in English)? Would love to learn this, I have a book about negotiation written by Igor Ryzov talking about the Russian way to do negotiations, nice book. But I want more, and I liked what they did here.
“Never Split the Difference”
When I use labels I often get a yes answer, I follow up with would you mind or opposed to elaborate on that?
But usually it should work without the follow up question right? Any advice?:)
Same question
What if I use a label and I get a "Yes" or "No" for a response what does that mean??
He wrote this in his book
Good to know these things. In future, as soon as I hear them being used on me, I will shut the discussion down and walk away from such manipulations. Thankyou for the insight.
For the insight?
@@stevecarter8810 Yup. "The insight." If I hadnt seen this video and some of the others, Id wouldnt have been aware, if and when, these techniques were being used on me. Personally I view this approach as highly manipulative, and not in a good way, but its good to be aware of what they are and develop countermeasures to shut them down, when you realize theyre being "used" on you.
Sounds like you really take a stand against being manipulated.
@@stevecarter8810 Dont you?
Do you regard "please" and "thank you" as manipulative?
Hello guys im here now l lesten to you now
Replicate in your one to ones?
Effective pauses
bad asss
This man said respect your mother
Respect your mother?
Greetings Chris, my names Ian and I live in the UK i love your book "never split the difference" Would it be a silly idea of me to personally ask, how does one become a black swan. Thank you
Great question Ian.
Hello Ian, I highly recommend you Nassim Nicolas Taleb's Black Swan. On a personal note: strive to be the linchpin in whatever field you're active.
can't use his own tricks against him LOL)))
Martijn M great book. I have it.
personally ask?
Mr Voss; YT took down your audiobook DSTD yesterday. I my opinion you have more to gain by sharing your book for free!! 1-you can gain more audience 2 build a great loyal customer base
3 sales of said book will exponentially increase
4 your mission and valuable experience will Scale info communities
There’s a specific way to “give for free “ and gain market satisfaction. How can you do this?
Please cut the bs. You seem like the kind of person that will try to squeeze free work out of people telling them it will help with their publicly. The book is not expensive. Why should he give it away for free? He's a business man and you're getting this CZcams video here for free aren't you?
It looks like/
it seems like/
it sounds like.
Or repeat the last 2-3 words
It seems that mirroring meant to extract more information from our counterpart and labeling is a way to get clear understanding about our counterpart desire until he or she prove it with "that's right". Am I correct Chris?
You're on the right track!
this looks like police integrator training, how exactly could you apply this in business?
Labeling and mirrors? Sounds like I have stumbled upon the right part of the CZcams 😂