How To Tell If A Man Hates Women
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- čas přidán 16. 01. 2024
- Regan’s a writer, actor, content creator, and “nice guy” nay-sayer. While she got her following making mom friendly content, a bad experience with a “nice guy” inspired her to create the F the Nice Guy podcast. Now she gets to do what she loves, sharing stories, laughing at a toxic man’s expense, and shredding the “nice guy” because… F the “nice guy”!
Note: Clip that inspired this conversation is from KC Davis (AKA @DomesticBlisters)
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It took me 3 years to see that red flag... ¨his exes were the worst women in the world and he was always the innocent victim of mean women¨
This makes no sense lmfao
Do women who have all their exes as mean men some man hating?
Seriously this starting to sound like a conspiracy theory circle jerk
Ya a lot of the time when someone is always around jerks I question them and think maybe they are the jerk
@@trix278I think you’re confused because you only look at it from a specific type of personal lens, basically what I’m trying to say is 2 things can be true at once, one group can have bad experiences with the other, while the another group can have fabricated bad experiences, while the other group doesn’t have fabricated experiences, so I mean just because one lies or twist the story doesn’t mean the other one automatically does as well, but this is all in a general sense, it’s obviously a different story when it’s individualized but the consensus is kinda the general version but like I said again this is in general, but it’s obviously different when it comes to individual stuff
Another thing is, I think your problem also lies in you thinking women are mens opposites or other halves or something so like for example just cause someone says men are silly that doesn’t mean that, that also applies to women lol basically what I’m saying is you need to stop thinking of women and men as reflections or ying yang lol we are our own ppl 😂
Let me guess: Now you're one of "the worst women" who, as a "mean" woman, victimized poor innocent him? If they talk about their ex that way, some day they'll talk about you that way too.
@@wiglicious.
You didn't answer the question, just a whataboutism+begging the question
I could easily argue:
"Women's bad experiences with men are fabricated"
What you just did to reply my comment was:
Women's bad experiences with men are proved by the fact that women's bad experiences with men are genuine
Conspiracy theory/religious sheeple stuff
And the fact you came straight out with that "ying-yang" assumption is what's more deserving of that try hard laughing emoji at the end of your comment -
I'm agnostic towards gender binaries and all that stuff
But that's another topic
i wish i knew which podcast it was but two women were sitting talking about men who don't like women but "love" their mom. the line of the day was "do you love your mother, or was she just the first woman to serve you?"
DAAAANG
Ooo..that's soo good
Oh, that is gooood!
YES EXACTLY
There are several rapists and serial killers of women who loved their moms Ed Gein was devastated when his mother died and felt like he had lost his only friend. David Berkowitz wanted approval from his mother and tried to find her after she abandoned him, but once he did she rejected him.
My ex thought he couldn't possibly be a misognyist because he loved his mom. Then he told me to my face that the only woman he's ever really loved or respected was his mom, knowing he has 3 daughters on this earth that he claims to love and his mom is dead.
Dude literally told me he's a misognyist without telling me he's a misogynist.
It's giving "I cant be racist because I have a black friend." Like, bro, that's not how it works. Someone should tell him that *women* are capable of misogyny as well. I bet his mind would fucking explode.
Christ
Define mysogonist?
@exisfohdr3904 dislike for, contempt for and ingrained prejudice against women. Which is exactly what's being described here. What are you trying to prove with your comment
@gwendolenyoung4198 I asked for your definition so I could fully understand your mindset.
Per your definition and your original post, your ex did not exhibit misogynistic behavior.
The only thing you stated in your original post was that he stated, "that the only woman he has ever really loved or respected was his mom." There is importance in the context word of "really" which implies he has loved other women, but his mother he loved more. That isn't misogyny, as the very statement implies he has loved women, especially his mother.
As far as your attempt at proving his supposed misogyny, you raised the fact that he has 3 daughters that he claims to love. Again, you state is emotional intent as "love". That being said, those are his daughters(likely children), and he may not view them as "women" as that word is typically reserved for adult females.
I see no misogyny being described.
I only see a person choosing to perceive statements as misogyny based on a will for it to be.
I once had a guy tell me online that all women aren’t funny and that men are just inherently funnier and more entertaining. What a wild take 😅
If you would like to see an extremely funny woman, might I recommend Diane Morgan as Philomena Cunk?
I'm assuming you are really young, because that was the common assumption not that long ago. 😂😭😭
There are a lot of uneducated people (both men and women) who still believe that nonsense. I mean, given how we still have flat earthers, it's not surprising we still have people who choose to be willfully ignorant.
@@paigeepler i love philomena cunk she always has me in stitches
@@miriam4235no that’s a misogynistic stereotype
An easy one for me is their stance on surnames. I didn’t change my surname after marriage and had a lot of men (and women) tell me that couples should have the same surname and it makes sense for it to be the man’s and that’s the traditional way. I should take the man’s name, it’s disrespectful to men if I don’t take their names, it’s one of the woman’s marital duties to her new husband. I’m Puerto Rican married to a Puerto Rican man, that’s not our naming tradition and we had no desire to follow a different culture’s traditions, but the amount of people that got angry that I didn’t take my husband’s name and feeling personally attacked that I didn’t want to do that was absolutely insane.
Im so sorry & feel you.
When I got "straight" married (not any longer), the lady filling out the forms at the courthouse Refused to let me keep my last name. I got very upset, she claimed she'd fixed it, but when we got the certificate? She'd changed my name... Made me feel so dismissed. ⭕❌
Isnt that illegal@@AmberAmber
@@carolinpurayidom4570 Yes.
But I was 17yo & pregnant. I simply didn't have the feeling of empowerment I have now that I'm much older.
OH surnames is such a big one!
if they wanna share a name thats normal. if they insist then its suspect
Exactly! I'm Chilean and we culturally don't change our surnames after marriage either, if a man feels offended that you won't do something that culturally you have no reason to do, that's a huge red flag already! Especially dudes getting mad at YOUR marriage when it doesn't involve them at all
If a guy talks about his awful ex, Mary, and why Mary was awful, I'm more likely to believe him. If he says all his exes are awful and women as a whole, then I know he doesn't see me as a person. I'm another statistic for the database, not someone he's actually interested in getting to know personally.
Amen. It follows the general rule: “If one person is an asshole to you, they’re probably the asshole. If EVERYONE is an asshole to you, you’re probably the asshole.”
Well put.
Goes both ways.
Clear red flag if it is always the ex's fault
@@sciencefliestothemoon2305 I struggle with this generalization. Abusive partners are a thing, and some people have a pattern of being drawn to abusive people, alcholics, etc because of stuff in their past. Obviously there are different ways of discussing a painful dating history like this, and some are way more flaggy than others, but this topic makes me uncofmortable because it can easily cross over into victim-blaming territory.
When I was younger all my ex's were awful because I was abused and I was stuck in a cycle of getting with abusive men because it's all I knew. Sometimes while it is still technically your fault, it's not because you're the asshole but because you were terrible at picking partners in the past.
Had a date once where the guy was talking about his ex/mother of his child and he said "she should have 💀 in childbirth." 🚩🚩🚩🚩
At the time I remember thinking that's a lot of unresolved anger that I don't want in my life. So I did not associate with him after that.
He said that on a date? Meaning that was his best behavior. Yiiikes.
Ya good call. That individual needs to work out a lot of things first
wtf, that's scary af!
Who would wish that upon their own child?! It sucks enough having parents that aren't together and don't even like each other, but not having a living mom would be way worse!
I mean I can't know for certain, but I gotta imagine that finding out that my birth _killed_ the woman that brought me into the world would screw me up pretty badly. Like even though I would know it wasn't my fault in any way, it would still undoubtedly cause some serious damage.
(ESPECIALLY with a dad like that 😬)
If this is his best behaviour, I don't want to see his worst.
Damn, no wonder she was his ex. I feel so bad for her and the children.
Whenever I hear a man's crazy ex story I just remember the joke about how women don't have crazy ex stories because all of the women who have a crazy ex story are dead. It really puts the story in it's perspective for pettiness.
The general problem why crazy ex-girlfriend stories are rampant is due to women having periods, so mood swings every month. A crazy guy is consistently crazy and probably learned how to hide it, so you look out for signs like boys torturing animals. Added on that ppd is also a major issue, and you can chalk it all up to as a stereotype of women are predisposition to be crazy. Now onto the male side we get into the argument of guys thinking that romance is just the obstacle from sex as if prostitution wax legal a lot of guys wouldnt bother being in a relationship and start to extremely compartmentalize their life. Guys will still be in romantic relationships, but it would more emotional as opposed to she looks hot and lets havebkids.
That was joke, and women do have a crazy ex stories they just are able to put together; unlike men, that their "crazy ex" was abusive and not "crazy".
I get the point you're trying to make but i had a male friend who's crazy ex story was that she tried to kill him in his sleep and he has the scar from the stab wound to prove it, males can also be victims of abuse and sometimes their crazy ex is in fact crazy, had she not started by stabbing him in the gut and immediately waking him up to defend himself he might not have been alive to tell his crazy ex story either
@christinehurley2487
The comedy routine referenced here actually didn't say that women with crazy ex stories are all dead, it said that their crazy ex stories usually just tend to escalate harder, aren't very funny and therefore don't make for good lighthearted party stories, which is part of why the crazy ex gf trope is so widespread. The joke being about how disturbingly awkward it would be if, say, a woman told the story of how her ex shot her dog and put her in a wheelchair in a social setting for everyone's amusement in the same way men often talk crazy ex-girlfriends. That being said, I doubt the guy you're talking about would tell the story of how his girlfriend almost murdered him in his sleep as a fun "my exes are all CRAZY🤪" type party story unless he's coping with a very particular brand of dark humor.
@@rainpooper7088 I'm aware he didn't say that; I was referencing a joke outside of and related to the material here. It's actually common to reference other material rather than consider separate sources separately. What's uncommon is having to "man"splain comedy to someone who's presuming to explain comedy to someone who already understands comedy. 🎭
went on a date (just one) with a guy where he talked about how he wished he had killed his Ex....he also said he controlled the weather.
Wuuuuut o.o
Agretsuko 0/
bro where do you even find a guy that terrible
the "controlled the weather" makes me think he had a psychotic episode, regardless though definitely someone you don't wanna meet again
@@slothy6096 he was a regular at the movie theater where I worked. He seemed nice enough, during the brief interactions. Learned my lesson, never date a customer. (I ended up marrying a coworker)
I was the crazy ex girlfriend for a year. What his girlfriend didn’t know was that we were still together, lifed together and he took her to our apartment while I was on a business trip. She was the one that he cheated on me with.
@susannehuber3996 I hope this isn't meant as a flex. You deserve way better than that
@@gwendolenyoung4198 there is nothing positive about what happened. I’m still traumatized to this day. Everybody deserves better. I did not see it coming at all. He always played the loving, nice boyfriend. That’s what shocked me the most.
I dated a guy for a year before I found out he was engaged. Ruined my reputation because people just assumed that I knew. I didn't. And not 1 person told me.
I was in an open relationship with a guy last year. We could both do what we wanted, that was fine. And he'd tell me about hookups he had too. Eventually I found out that he was in a committed relationship with one of these "hookups" for nearly two months. Like, saying "I love you" and the whole nine yards. And she had no idea. She didn't know about him sleeping around, she didn't know about me and my long-term relationship with him. At one point he said that he had told her all about me, but referred to me as his "friend", as if that made it better and not worse. Dude was literally confused why I would break up with him for cheating on *another* woman with me.
One of the mindsets that will get you stuck is thinking "not me" about how a man acts. One of the tales they used to tell was if he's mean to others but nice to you he cares about you. No. If he acts mean or talks about other women like crap, you are not exempt! People should respect others unless given a real reason not to. (They're a dick)
No, you respect those that earn respect, and mock those that demand it unearned. existing doesnt deserve respect by default
@@DellikkilleD have you considered going to therapy?
Thanks for wording it ✌🏼
@@DellikkilleD No, you give basic respect to everyone until they do something not to earn it but even then, how you treat others is a reflection of your character, not others. If you treat everyone with disrespect, then you are a jerk, there is no other way about it.
@@DellikkilleDan individual's treatment of others is a reflection his or her decency as a human. The attitude you advocate for says to me, "that person has zero class, many issues and much anger" I feel sorry for you. And sorrier for the people your attitude is inflicted on.
Another way to weed out the disrespect is to watch out for negging (insults disguised as jokes) or disparaging comments online. On the other hand, I appreciate when guys are that transparent and tell on themselves, makes it so much easier to avoid them. 😂
To be fair, a lot of guys neg because they've internalized the idea that women don't like men who are too into them so they pretend to be disinterested or even disdainful so they won't look clingy. Sad shit.
I'm bi. When I was single, if I was on a first date with a man, I'd let them know I'm bi. I was out the door if they said one of three things, and they usually did:
1. But what do two women do in bed? (To which I'd reply, "If you can't figure that out, you're a lousy lay.")
2. Can I watch? (Me: "No, my life isn't your porn.")
3. Did you ever think of a threesome? (Me: "No. Again, I'm not porn.")
As for the ex topic, if they say their ex is simply "crazy," and most of them do, leave. Or ask them why things didn't work out with their ex. If they then list everything she did wrong, but nothing they did wrong, ask them about it: "What do you think you did wrong in the relationship?" If they can only come up with, "I put up with it too long," get out now.
I mean, unless his examples of what she did wrong were off the wall crazy. “She tried to fistfight my mom. That should have been my first sign to leave. When she punted the baby into the swimming pool, I knew I had to escape.” At that point “what do you think you did wrong in the relationship?” isn’t a question I need to ask. I’m just going to agree that “staying too long” was a valid answer and leave it at that. This sounds extreme, but I’ve seen some stuff. Sometimes “she was crazy” is an accurate assessment.
ETA- I’m not discounting anything you said. I’m bi too. I’ve gone through that song and dance myself. And some dudes really do hate women and love nothing more than to tell on themselves if you give them time and a platform. But, I’m going to take things as a case by case basis, even some of the weird stuff. But I’m going to have my escape plan handy all the same.
Same experience. Also NEVER date a homophobe or r@cist they're just bad people and with all those prejudices and hang-ups they probably hate (real, independent) women, too
Well crap... I would definitely be guilty of 2 and 3... I'll blame it on lack of experience. I have a good a mount of gay friends, but no bi friends. Thank you for the perspective.
Edit: To be clear, I've never actually said those things to anyone, but I sure as hell thought it.
@@Alexadria205 Just remember: women are not porn. Just keep that in your head.
Saying you are Bi has a weird "PickMe I am your Ticket to threesome fantasy".
I had Sex with women. I would NEVER EVER tell am man I am Bi.
First: not his businesS.
Second: I don't want to be part of the LGBT+MAP Narcicissts you see on TikTok.
One thing I adore about your channel is how often you boost women’s voice. You don’t mansplain or quote or pretend that you come up with something yourself, you show the clips and voices of these women on your platform. That’s rare
Boosting crazy, man hating women who make divisive generalizations is not rare. The internet runs on it.
is it just me or is he also boosting the voice of men who also think this way?
@@chromosundrift i dont think he is, hes responding to them, besides, in order to debunk the claims that women have nothing bad happening to them, he has to show that some guys do in fact do bad stuff
"Most men don't like women"
Yeah, and they get really mad when other men openly display that they like women.
Like, I'm certain it wasn't "the Left" that cancelled JoCat off CZcams for making a song about liking women.
There's a meme like "guys, is it gay to like women?" and .... yeah, there's a sadly rather large group of men that actually think this -.-
No, sadly, the JoCat thing WAS from the Left: it was too heteronormative and misogynist (supposedly). You can find the comments.
Idk, love.
There are 8 billion people on Earth and though I would LOVE to believe JoCat’s harassment was right leaning people, I really think it wasn’t.
There are a ton of misguided left leaning people. There are a ton of people who legitimately cannot tell a harmless from a harmful display of heterosexual pride/appreciation of women. Twitter is full of wokescolds, sadly.
And also: some people are just misandrous.
I fear calling every last one of them quote unquote “leftists” to engage into a “no true Scotsman fallacy.”
As of women like men at all. I mean even studies prove it that this entire point is pire projection by women as they have greater in gender bias
I loved that song and I'm mad to find out he got flack over it, like wtf?
@Nerobyrne:
"There's a meme like "guys, is it gay to like women?" and .... yeah, there's a sadly rather large group of men that actually think this -.-"
And a lot of women who do too. Sitting in a bar late night I overheard three women discussing male violence towards women. One of the women had just been assaulted in a nightclub by her boyfriend and the bouncers had had to drag him off. "They shouldn't hit us" was one of her companions opinion. "No, it just means they care", was the 'victims' bizarre reply. These were not rough women but educated middle class professionals. And I've come across this mindset many many times. Violence is an equal opportunities employer and not just a male only activity.
There was a clip posted from the show "Big Brother" with one of the guys in the house having a showmance with one of the women and they're laying next to eachother talking.
The guy straight up says to her "I never thought of women as people before..." and goes on to say how easy she is to talk to, etc.
I looked at the comments about it and there were so many guys who were saying how they understand what that guy is saying and almost patting him on the back for atleast saying it. It was wild how many guys think that women aren't even people and they need someone to actually tell them that! Like what kind of boulder have they been under or cave are they living in! The basic logic that women gave birth to them and therefore, they must have come out of a person went over their heads.
I guess better to work through it than to live on like that, but damn... the bar really is subterranean but they're tunneling to limbo that
@@sugarqbs I thought it was a big joke at first but the more comments I read, I realized that a lot of those guys actually haven't talked to a woman and some made up things in their heads to try to rationalize how women are not human. Most comments didn't seem angry or bashing women but just an actual belief. It was kind of frightening.
It just seemed like collective mental illness.
@@coolbreeze5683 I will not defend the actions of anyone who dehumanizes others to such a broad extent but I do think there is something interesting going on in terms of how men are socialized.
I think Speech Prof actually had some really insightful notes in a video about Matt Rife: how men are conditioned to value feedback from other Men more highly than feedback of others. It's telling that defending a woman will make some immediately read you as a white knight, because what kind of guy would defend a woman against masculine consensus if not for some ulterior motive (and tbf there are guys who are manipulative like that, it's a shame they monopolize the word "nice"). Once you've spotted the trend, you can get some really nice on-the-ground insights on toxic masculinity, like how gay is such an insult that homies can't hug without at least cracking a meta-joke
What were they thinking women are? If not a person, what else?
They see us on the level of children or like, dogs. It's depressing.
As a man I am pretty tired of hearing dudes say their ex is crazy that I use blanket statements like that it let's me know I probably shouldn't be friends with that person
Agreed
@@allthenewsordeath5772 If ALL your exes are "crazy", you're the problem. If your exes were all actually bad you'll have plenty of examples of how they legitimately abused you, rather than examples where they had boundaries you didn't want them to have. It's not hard to separate the two with just a couple of questions which means its a heuristic that has more positives than false-positives.
@@allthenewsordeath5772 If a man calls his ex crazy, I’m gonna need examples. For instance “she got mad when I didn’t put my dirty clothes in the hamper”? Not crazy, man’s just an idiot. “She’s been outside my house for three weeks, lurking in the trash cans, throwing snapping turtles at any woman who comes up the driveway”? …Yeah, she’s crazy. Also, call the cops.
All of men's negative experiences with women are invalid and their own fault
@@allthenewsordeath5772 What?
Bro she's literally the "Deranged Hermit" from Magic the Gathering ^.^
I'd love to meet her lol
There's an adage that applies not just to people talking about their exes, but more broadly:
If you met an asshole in the morning, you met an asshole.
If you met an asshole in the afternoon, you met an asshole.
If you met an asshole in the evening, you met an asshole.
If you met an asshole in the morning, afternoon, and evening, you're the asshole.
Letting ‘em talk is such solid advice and it works for just about anyone. Along with the equally valuable advice; ‘when someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.’
I'm glad the comments are low, because this wasn't my experience. You can get a guy who will tell you all the right things, agree with feminism in principal, ect ect, and won't tell you what they really think even when you ask or let them talk (the will lie!) - they know what they think is bad, and will hide it! This type, you have to watch for the red flag behavior, and the actions, not the words. They won't tell you what they actually think, until it's honestly too late and then their actions are what they are and you call them on it then, then they will tell you what they think, and it's crazy making.
One of that type (raised by a feminist single mother) is the reason I never went for nice guys ever after him. I said after that situation "all men are assholes. I need to know what type of asshole my partner is early on and if I can handle it".
Now happy w my bf for over a decade. He can be difficult but its never aimed at me. We're both difficult but can handle each other and only got better together over the years. He is super nice but also very real and honest (not everyone can handle that much honesty)
Yeah....I think man culture has it "agree to anything....and then do what you want".
I made excuses for him, waiting for him to "grow up". I finally had to face the fact that he was very happy with himself, and wasn't about to change.
Then it just was a matter of if I could live with him, knowing he would always be deceitful and disappointing.
I've only got one life; I walked, never looked back, and I'm only sorry I wasted so much time believing his lies and hoping for better.
I have this tip: ask them about a polarising figure like Kim K.
There's tons of people who hate her, why they hate her and how they criticize her will tell you a lot about them.
Is it because she uses unethical labour for her brand? Or is it because she is voluptuous and became famous due to a tape?
It's easy to not be a misogynist whe judging a woman without flaw, it's dificult to keep up the facade when talking about one who has many.
@@j-1698This is a really interesting and insightful tip, thanks! I'll definitely keep that one in my pocket for the future.
I had a close male friend like this in our mostly female friend group - he would agree and sympathise with us whenever we talked about feminist topics. In hindsight however, he would never initiate these conversations or introduce new ideas/viewpoints. Additionally, he would also get INCREDIBLY uncomfortable and sometimes defensive whenever we mentioned periods or other topics specific to female anatomy.
He eventually outed himself when his best friend assaulted a woman at a party, and when learning about it, his response was "oh yeah haha, he can be a bit toxic when he's drunk" and "what do you want me to do about it?"
I had a friend - and he was a good *friend*- ask once why all the women he dated were crazy. I pointed out that they all had one thing in common. Him. That maybe they weren't crazy, maybe the way he was treating them was shitty.
I had a friend - and she was a good friend - ask once about why all the men she dated were abusive. I pointed out that she continually chose men that displayed this behavior, and so maybe they were abusive because they thought that's what she wanted.
@@liesareeasytospot99 I doubt they were abusive because they thought that's what she wanted- but there was clearly something there that she was attracted to, and behavior that she allowed and shouldn't have. I hope she was able to grow past that
@@heatherwest7615 she had a masochistic urge she felt guilty about satisfying and she blamed all men instead of the ones she chose
This person's a troll. Don't engage.@@heatherwest7615
@@heatherwest7615that other user has veen trolling hard in these comments. Def sus incel vibes 👀👀
The problem I see is not that men don't tell on themselves, because they do all the time (hatred is a strong emotion, it's difficult to hide). It's that women don't listen or take anything to heart because they've been conditioned to think things about men and themselves that aren't true
Edit to add: it starts with Disney romances aimed at little girls. It's to dangle "love" in your face like a carrot when you simply will never get that with most men because they don't even like you
If you think that the empty human fan fictions that are disney princess are a realistic standard, then you sound like these guy who think women should be these barbie-f-dolls.
Disney princes are notoriously bad representation for boys, do much harm by filling head of young boys that that is what they are "competing" with in the heads of women and set an unrealistic and toxic standard...
Very true, and important to consider. We were socialized to ignore our own judgement.
@@allthenewsordeath5772 🤡 Of course we're uneasy in a society designed to devalue us. Keep the passive-aggression in your pants.
@@elenachristian9860men who trust their judgment are insecure. Women are always right.
@@allthenewsordeath5772 Talking to yourself there?
THE AMOUNT OF TIMES I HAVE THOUGHT THAT SO MANY MEN DO NOT LIKE WOMEN!
Despite the amount of hate guys get for being girly, it took me a while to realize that a lot of men are conditioned to view femininity as inferior in any context. Oddly enough, I feel like they're not any nicer to tomboys, so there's probably a lot of conflicting narratives about who should act how
@@sugarqbsI get what you’re saying i really do but all imma say is it’s conveniently not conflicting when it “benefits” them🤷🏾♀️and that’s obviously situational I’m just saying in general
@@wiglicious. You’re absolutely right and that’s the only reason it sticks around
@@sugarqbs I'm a female nonbinary person, still mostly don't tell a lot of people.
I present and act pretty masculine.
This bothers some men, definitely.
I have to force myself to be less assertive, because I get dinged for it.
@@grmpEqweer All this fuss about how certain types of people ought to act somehow overrides basic decency, it’s a weird arrangement of priorities
I love men, I only blame the _Nice_ guys I've dated for their behavior bc some times it'sjust the truth, they sucked. One of them said "*ALL* the women here are crazy." I know you bro, you made them that way.
Podcasts are perfect places to find these guys in their natural habitat: "Welcome to White Bro Dude, my twice-weekly podcast, I'm joined by two other white bro dudes and we're gonna talk for 3 hours about how women never shut up."
Also this: “we hate those beta males who whine & complain and so we’re gonna whine and complain about that for 3 hours”.
Why does he have to be white. How's that relevant. Alot of black podcasters talk about dating and gender relationships, maybe even more than white ones.
@@liesareeasytospot99 Because that's the overwhelming demographic of "podcaster" - 2/3 are men and 80% are white.
@@gardnerhill9073 source? Sounds like you made that up
@@liesareeasytospot99 The fact you’re getting so defensive over this makes me think 2 things.
1.) in your pfp, you are the boy in the left
2.) you may, in fact, be one of these “bro dudes” that OP talked about. The kind who may or may not like women
Yep. Listen and pay attention. Most of them are smart enough to hide it at first. They will be chivalrous, generous, sweet, attentive, and caring. So give it a minute. I have found that it often reveals itself in one of two ways: they will "joke" about how crazy, emotional, and irrational women are. When they do, don't react. Laugh it off. That will encourage them to keep going and they will reveal their misogyny and disrespect for women. I also like to talk about movies that feature a strong female character and ask them have they seen the movie and if so, what did they think of the characters? If they refuse to watch any movie that has a woman as the main character, ask them why they didn't want to see those movies. If they talk about a female character, pay attention to what they say about her. Their disdain and hatred for women, particularly independent ones, will come out then. It works every time.
It's not all women, many are great, most are average, others are horrible. And it really is funny to me that a lot of the women who hate guys because they think they are jerks, toxic, manipulative, arrogant, and overly strong willed are the same women who intentionally(or unintentionally) take on those traits to prove how "independent" they are.
Perhaps if we men and women look for the good in each other and try to nurture that, we will both become better... As opposed to looking for flaws, which are sure to be present because each one of us is human.
@@laststand6420there’s a difference between flaws and someone hating you. Racism is not a “small flaw”. Neither is misogyny.
Stop trying to downplay toxic and dangerous traits as “everybody has flaws”
the most easy one lately is asking them if they've seen Barbie and if so, what they thought about it. if they havemt seen it, are they willing to see it if a woman asks him to.
@@laststand6420if you don’t want women to be independent then stop getting mad and calling them golddiggers or getting mad when they want tall men🤷🏾♀️
If your first date conversation is an ideological survey then that's a red flag for men.
Men like this are low-hanging fruit. It's the people who believe they're healed, enlightened and have no dark side, who are worth the watching.
I cant believe were still dealing with this
I know, it's like all the work we've put in for human rights has been undone and we've regressed as a society...
@@Ang36914 Not undone, just never done. Narcissistic men haven't changed. I knew several men when I was dating who were stabbed by women; like she said, let them talk and it'll become obvious why. When a man tells you that some crazy woman stabbed him for no reason, run. There's always a reason.
I can. I see not much improvement in my 47yrs. In some ways, most of those who don't like women are hating us worse.
@@edennis8578 That's true, the work never feels done. That's also good advice. It makes me think of when I watched a man on 90 Day Fiance who told his fiance that ALL of his exes were crazy but the common denominator was never him, of course, even though he cheated on all of his exes.
@@edennis8578it’s not just narcissistic men, we are talking about the majority of the male population. Most of them don’t like women as people.
I always feel a bit iffy about the "if they call their ex crazy, leave" advice. We are so quick to discount male survivors of abuse. It is definitely like a yellow flag, but I think it's like she said, ask follow-up questions. Like "I had an insanely toxic ex, she would track my phone and be texting me 24/7 asking where I was, demanding I reply instantly" and "My ex is a crazy bitch, she got mad at me that one time because I refused to take care of our newborn baby for a day so she could visit her very sick father" are not the same.
Very good point, there are some men and women out there who are horrible nightmares to be around. If a man happened to date one of those women, it doesn't make him the problem for running away.
In my experience, male friends who are in abusive relationships with women tended to downplay, normalise, and excuse the abuse.
Everything was their fault. She was just a bit moody nowadays. He was hopeless, so if course she had to control the finances. He messed up all the time, so she needed to supervise his every move.
Both men and women are capable of evil and of good, observe and get to know the people in your life so you avoid those who would harm you.
@@Humanoidfrenzzy Yeah, I see that too. Female and nonbinary victims of abuse tend to do the same thing, of course, but they're more likely to be called out on it, especially if their abuser is a male romantic partner. Female and queer friend groups tend to quickly go "That's not okay, he shouldn't treat you that way, dump his ass". It's not the same in male friend groups, and men are more often told to "toughen up". This makes it harder for male victims to speak out and find help.
@@neolp I disagree. It is not your partner's job to "fix you" or heal your trauma or whatever, but it's good to be open about past relationships and such things so people can understand where you are coming from. Not on a first date, but when you feel comfortable in a relationship, I definitely don't think the topic should be taboo. You don't NEED to talk about your ex, but that doesn't mean you can't or never should.
@@neolp I don't think you're not allowed to complain, but I agree that how you talk about what happened tells a lot about you and there are unhealthy ways to talk about it. Which is exactly what my original comment was about.
Thank you ❤
I'm married but how fucking low the bar is for my fellow men to just not be misogynistic is really fucking sad.
when you get treated a certain way by a certain group of people all your life. you tend to make certain assumptions. Its the same with women who are misandrists.
@@madmintentertainment6268 and yet guys like this one still walk into the bar head first 😂
THEY HATE when I ask "so why do you think you enjoy jokes like that?"
Why? If you say women arent funny and laugh and a woman goes "WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING!?" they are kinda proving the joke. So they should LOVE it when you say that.
@@madmintentertainment6268 That's such a great joke! I beg you, tell it on every first date, preferably in the first five minutes.
@@TheHanyuuuuu good idea! It'll be a good tester for if a woman is a woman or a fragile little girl.
And I don't date children
I got a jury summons recently. I told my guy friend and I swear this man said to me,
"It's probably a r*** case. Women usually only get jury duty to put a man in prison for r***."
I had to hang up the phone and calm down before calling him back to talk about that.
I'd say it starts with ignorance, with failing to understand one another as another person. Then, that ignorance unresolved can become manifested as fear.
Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.
Yes! If a guy I'm on a date with says something sus, I sip my drink & let him cook. 8 times out of 10 they talk their way out if my pants.
From experience, a major red flag is the SO tries to keep you from seeing friends or family. My wife and I have a close friend who would let her husband know days in advance she is coming to hangout with us. The day of we would get calls or texts from her that he is angry, shouting, etc. One night she was late, and the texts/calls suddenly stopped. This was due to a massive fight they had. She is ok now and no longer with the guy, but he essentially had created this persona that he was a nice wealthy church man, we all believed he was nice. The distinction in this case was he was keeping her from seeing us at every moment he could and kept her in a marriage threatening her verbally and physically, daily in front of their kids. I would like to add there is a major difference between a nice guy and an absolute coward, which he was. Cowardly men can be extremely dangerous.
First date he made a joke about wanting to shoot his ex... everyone told me I was too dramatic to be weirded out about it
Yeah, that's not creepy at all... /sarcasm
yeah, especially the joke part, why is it a joke, one thing is seriouslly hating your ex, but another is like, joking so easilly about this
I am a little older. This conversation needs to start around age 12. I hate to say this but it’s too late. All you can do is organize your life to avoid the 80% of men who do truly mean you-women-harm. It’s exactly as it’s stated here. Men have been raised to fundamentally not like or respect women. With those numbers, if you happen to be straight, the chance you’ll end up with a nontoxic man is not good. But no man is better than the one you had to get rid off. And there isn’t one day that you’ll ever forget that or ever be sorry.
80%?! Where'd you get that number?
80%?
That's a pretty extreme number you've thrown out
Fearmongering is hardly beneficial Maam
I don't know the experiences you've had, but please don't assume they represent the vast majority of a whole demographic
We're different people and it's not really fair to assume that 80% of ANY demographic are going to think the same
let alone one that is completely beyond our control
being male is not a religion
it's a circumstance
I have a love/hate relationship with humanity in general.
I met my current fiance in college. We didn't date for the longest time, partially because I thought he was ace or just wasn't interested in me or women. As it would turn out, I just wasn't used to interacting with men (especially in a college setting) who didn't talk to women with ulterior motives or disrespectfully. He was just courteous and actually listened to women. No ulterior motives. No vibe that he felt superior to them.
It was so weird for me in the beginning when my husband sad only nice or neutral things about his exes. I wasn't used to it, at all. Even when it was really disturbing stuff they had done, he wasn't blaming or mean about it. Now my ex on the other hand (effeminate nice guy) would constantly be bashing other women (not just ones he had been in a relationship with). He'd try to get me to join in, and tell me other women were giving me shady looks or talking behind my back. THIS IS A RED FLAG!! < for anyone who needs ro hear it.
NOW if I even make a snarky side comment about my husband's ex (who is legitimately psychotic), my husband (gruff seeming super masculine dude) shuts it down or leaves the room. I have so much respect for him.
So true. I had a friend(I was his rare female friend) that treated women like Kleenex, all the while complaining he'd never find true love. Our friendship ended when I was honest with him. I told him first he had to like women B4 he could ever hope to love one. He called me crazy, because he'd been with hundreds. I pointed out women were just his sex goalpost, and it ended there for him. U know, I think he was more upset that we wouldn't go along with him & feel sorry for him 'always missing out on true love.' The guys only love was always going 2B himself. The world would B a much better place if people were honest about themselves & their motivations.
There are podcasts of guys that respect everyone but they don’t get the viral views because people love to hate! So people share the videos of the toxic men “can you believe this?!?” and content made by respectful men isn’t “salacious” or scandalous enough to get shared for shock value, but it’s out there
Like Modern Renaissance Man
"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake." - Napoleon Bonaparte
Great technique! This also works more generally in life:I find it useful to note how all people describe others, for all kinds of relationship - romantic, friendship, or professional. Sometimes people even describe experiences, meals, places etc. by listing only what they hate. Very conspicuous. My response then is usually "OK well what DO you like?". Sometimes people literally respond to that with "what do I like ... hmmm... I dunno, but I'll tell you what I DON'T like" and at that point I'm out.
“I’m a nice guy” bahahahahaha they don’t have to say it
"I just got out of a three year long abusive relationship" bahahaha they don't have to say it
This worries me mildly because my ex had some pretty wild narcissistic traits.
But I am also pretty good at being accountable for my own bullshit and not painting myself the hero.
Her inability to do the same when she was clearly in the wrong was one of the major red flags.
Like she borrowed my switch, got mad and verbally abused me when I wanted it back , and I had to track her her down through her dad.
He told me he would talk to her. And later told me she has gone into rehab and he will get my switch out of the pawn shop.
She then returned it and asked for forgiveness, and I mostly forgave her but was wanting for her best behaviour to end.
She told me her dad really likes me and she loves me. But a couple weeks later she broke up with me and blocked me everywhere because I asked her not to tell me about her dates with other guys.
She was poly the whole time I dated her. And it was probably more of a situationship. We were very close but she was very inconsistent with her physical affection. Which caused me a lot of distress. Wanting more. And then she would disappear for weeks, while my anxious attachment caused me heart ache. And then she would pop up again with a new crisis for me to support her through.
It seemed pretty clear she was doing this with several guys. And would burn through them and rotate them out. That she didn’t seem to have any lasting friendships. Only boyfriends she calls friends.
She came back one time after I dealt with 3 weeks of particularly bad heartache.
And she told me all new stories about her being d.I.d. Split personalities. And I spoke to her child personality for a few days via text.
The timing of her going into rehab right when her dad confronted her about what I told him.
Makes me suspect that the addiction could be fake too.
She is going to treatment etc. which I supported .
but she also used it to excuse her behaviour And not take accountability for her bad actions and hurting me and others.
Another reason I suspect narcissism. She can’t handle any criticism.
Mentioning the things she has done very recently that still cause pain is consider personal attacks.
She was crazy,
But I’m just as crazy because I still miss the good parts and connection we had.
Narcissistic abuse is a hell of a drug.
You were abused. she was crazy. you are fine. You shouldnt have to put yourself down in favor of your abuser to not be a misogynist. This is why I hate speechprof's videos.
I love your channel so much ❤ i wish every woman had this info in grade school so we could know better!
The exes one is SO TRUE!
The corollary to Maya Angelou's "Believe people when they tell you who they are" is, "If you let people talk long enough, they will tell you who they are."
Those subtitles with no punctuation and no way to distinguish between the two speakers talking over each other are infuriating.
My fiance described his relationship with his ex wife initially as "we just have too different of approaches to life but we're both good parents so we lean on each other for different things." I mean, that's accurate, but he let me discover for myself that she's kinda self-absorbed and unaware of the feelings of others. He also described another ex I turned out to know as having "ghosted me, but I didn't take it personally because she seemed confused." And tbh knowing her I was instantly like "that tracks" 🤣 It's true, men who aren't defamatory toward their exes are the best 💖
My brother has legit had a "crazy" (translation: extremely manipulative) gf and he still speaks about her w more respect than some of these dudes on their podcasts give to their mommas.
Because he was abused and brainwashed and yall let it happen. Of course hes gonna talk about her respectfully. Dude was taught to.
@madmintentertainment6268 How about you don't speak on situations you don't know shit about? I'm sorry your parents didn't love and support you, but me and mine did everything we could to help until he finally broke-up w her.
@@TheWordN3rd aww did I hit a nerve?
You just basically praised him for being respectful to his abuser. So clearly you didn't do that much.
Honestly lol
@madmintentertainment6268 Sweetie, you were the one that saw me praising my brother for treating his ex like a real person and got so triggered you picked a fight with a stranger on the internet. I hope someday, you're able to look in the mirror and realize the only person keeping you from love and fulfillment is you. I promise it gets better after that. Have a nice day 😘
@@TheWordN3rd "treating his ex like a real person" lol after she abused him?
What a good boy he is. You are probably training him for the next one.
Im sorry you got upset because someone called you out for enabling abusers, if it were you I doubt you would treat your ex with such respect, and if you did I doubt you would be praised for it.
if "love and fulfillment" is letting yourself be abused and talking about your abuser with respect afterwards while your family (who is supposed to help and support you btw) praises you for it. I don't want it.
"obviously this wouldn't come up on a first date" oh you have no IDEA
I think this is cultural and taught by their fathers by seeing how the dads treaded their mothers in the home. Essentially a learned behavior from birth.
yeah a ton of men grew up without fathers. So this is BS.
As someone with a narcissist mother, I can tell you that it doesn't have to be the father. Growing up with a narcissist mother, I easily could have gone down the road of A, imitating her behavior or B, generalized that all women were like her and hate all women. If anything, my father is an extreme enabler (the one who implicitly taught me that abuse towards me is okay). Long story short, there are many reasons why men become garbage. I am happily married now because I chose to be like neither parent.
@@Hopper12345 I agree. It can be either or both parents.
My ex husband had stories of how crazy all his exes were. I wish I’d seen that for the red flag it was. Turns out he mistreated women until they snapped. Plus found out what he called crazy was the women calling him out for crap he did.
shortcut: ask him to tell you about the women in his life
There's another angle to this .Why does an actually decent person seem to repeatedly end up with a partner who has underlying deepset issues?
Is because they feel intimidated by someone that they perceive as "too good" for them and fear not being able to live up to their standards or to be their savior/fixer upper, or to have the social, mental and emotional upperhand so they don't get hurt?
Yeah, it's complicated and you wouldn't know unless you psychoanalyzed them to find out why. If I had to go out on a limb and give a blanket statement of an answer, it would be that they feel good and needed, helping someone else through their problems which would emotionally bond them together and they would help each other survive in the future.
I feel like this really goes with the whole wanting a crazy girl or girl with low self esteem fet1sh thing, the only difference is in these case, the guys are never good or decent guys🤷🏾♀️
A very funny way that I tend to view things towards issues on men and women is this-
How would lesbians and gay men react to this situation on average?
I don't know what it is, but it really do just be straight people who seemingly hate each other.
Not to say toxic relationships don't exist among same sex couples, but it's different because they follow one fundamental thing that a lot of straight people dont for some reason-
Do you LIKE the PERSON you're ATTRACTED TO? It's like obviously non-negotiable.
But there are literally communities like-
"AreTheStraightsOkay?"
Where it's just a bunch of-
Primarily gay and bisexual people-
Wondering why straight people seemingly hate each other a lot more, and will sit in unhealthy relationships.
It's generally because of things like this.
I'm straight, the greatest thing I ever did was not listen to other straight people.
I explicitly never wanted a relationship like my parents, and I'm better off for it.
Ironically, we have a lot to learn about love from the gays. The disconnect between between straight people (due to gender roles/patriarchy) absolutely fucks up our understanding of love, respect, and connection. I follow the r/arethestraightsokay sub and sometimes the content on there I immediately register as a "joke" because I've been conditioned to, and then I'm like "oh wait, that's actually terrible".
@@brennam954 Yup, honestly I've had a lot of assumptions made about me because a lot of my friends trended towards the LGBT+ side of things-
Ironically though, I think the diversity of my social circle just sort of desensitized me to any sort of bias or "gender war" stuff.
I think to some degree we've embedded a weird idea of "different means bad", whether consciously or unconsciously into our culture. Whether through personal bad experiences, or just osmosis and environment, personally I always found the idea of men not understanding women issues and women not understanding men issues to be...bizarre-
At it's worst, it can be like two strangers who have literally never met and know nothing about each other, yelling at each other because "MY life is HARD, and YOU'RE the reason why."
I don't know if it's maybe a glitch in the human brain or something, but for fairly obvious reasons, it would seem to me that it's much more difficult for these biases to take root in same-sex relationships, potentially because it's difficult to say that-
"All women are the problem" when you're a woman yourself.
People have a natural response to craft meaning from their emotions, rather than from what's in front of them, taking away the ability to make sweeping generalizations even slightly seems to help remedy this somewhat.
Ultimately I think it all comes down to recognizing-
We're all born on a 50/50 coin toss, gender defines no one, we're all human and we're all people, recognize the individuals, and be careful about finding false patterns, as there are bad people from all walks of life, that doesn't mean that all those walks of life are what make those people bad.
The human brain is a pattern recognition machine, and it's important to recognize when to reign it in.
@@allthenewsordeath5772I don’t think that’s really entirely true, especially since plenty of ppl have already talked about why that’s statistic is misread I’m pretty sure even this creator made a video on it
And Not to be rude but even if you weren’t sure if the statistic was true or not I mean you could just look at the world around you, like for instance how could that statistic possibly be true if g@y ppl weren’t even originally allowed to get married
It's literally an internet hustle. I don't work with or have anyone in my life that behaves this way towards the opposite sex.
@@adrianhartso7060 It’s very comforting to hear a man say all of his male friends are nice guys 🤦♀️
Gee...who'd have EVER thought that the best and most efficient way to find out what somebody thinks or feels about a topic/demographic is to LISTEN to them and ask clarifying questions...
I'd have never figured THAT out in a million years...that's some fine sleuthing indeed.
Society needs a reboot T_T
i used to think the whole “my ex is crazy” thing was unfair. i had a legit terrible ex and there was no way for me to talk about them without me coming off like that. then i got to a place in my healing where i just prefer not to talk about the ex at all, and i’ve found ways to tell my stories that exclude them as much as possible. and i realized just spending that much energy on your ex IS the red flag.
Only ex I have anything bad to say anything about is the mother of my kids. As I won’t say anything about her our eldest, now turning thirty, doesn’t 100% agree with, I figure I’m in the clear. Literal, no bullshit diagnosis of borderline personality disorder. Given her childhood traumas, it’s even understandable. Glad to say she’s finally gotten help.
Am I still pissed at her? Yup. After 25 years? Yup. The stories our eldest tells are bad enough for that. Says a lot she personally abided by our agreement not to subject the boys to corporal punishment. Even if her boyfiends didn’t. I married a woman who didn’t want kids who, in my eldest’s words, was more of a mother than the one who gave birth. And no one would mistake my wife for maternal. She just offered them the respect they earned and that was enough.
But the rest of my exes, such as they are? Nothing bad to say at all. Any and all mistakes were mine. Or near enough it doesn’t matter now.
Take that sexist crap outta here. Women are always right.
Bad troll is bad@@liesareeasytospot99
No, I fucked up with the two exes previous to my current (and very long-term, thank you), partner. One of them, I didn't understand what she wanted, because I still had some growing to do, and the other I just, so help me, I got bored of, and ghosted. Not very mature, but in my defense I was 22 and going through it in a lot of ways.
I tried very hard to drag my mom out of the darkness, I made it out, it didn't make sense to me at the time why she wouldn't. It's horrifying, but coping mechanisms mask as comforting things, even if they're self-destructive.
Anyway, I have and have always had friends that are women. I like being around good people, and that's a vibe good people pick up on. Some are male, some are female. Some are cis, some are trans, some are somewhere in between. Most of them are on several spectrums, and I love them for their differences and their different understandings of the world. It enriches my experience to hear others tell abour theirs. You can't beat it. 😊
Something that drives me nuts. One of my best friends is just about the sweetest guy you'd ever meet. But it's like because he wouldn't hate our hurt someone just for being a woman, he thinks nobody else would either. Even when these toxic guys are straight up saying how much they hate women, he thinks they're just frustrated or something.
Just letting people talk is one of the greatest interrogation techniques ever.
Exactly this. I went to a talk by Bob Woodward -- one of the greatest investigative journalists of all time -- a few years ago, and he talked about this concept extensively. Basically that's how he got the leads that helped him and Carl Bernstein uncover the Watergate break-in: by sitting quietly and letting people talk until they incriminated themselves.
I think about it whenever I wonder if men have crushs on female characters (anime or real ones). Through ou my teens years I had several crush on characters, such as Dean (supernatural) but I realized I didn't feel the same about the actor (in spite of being literally the same person), so I concluded that what attracted me was this character as a human being, not his appearance. I wonder if men have ever experienced that, bc I've never heard of one.
I mean, yes? I feel this is a fairly universal experience? It was Buffy for me.
You never heard of waifu? oO and let's be real, all anime women look the same, so waifus have to be chosen by their personality
What they say, sure. But the key is really to pay attention to their actions, that's how you really know. Like if they don't let you speak or if they wait for you to tend to their every need, I could give more horrible examples but I really don't want to
It took me 3 years to snap and break up,
But it took 1.5 years for them to finally uncover their shittier mentality.
I have a lot of ex's that were toxic, but I've always held my hands up and accepted accountability that "I was / became a POS too, that isn't okay, I'm trying to learn my triggers and learning to stop, breath and think before I act."
I still mess up. A lot. Especially in a high-trigger state.
But I also have ex's that were nothing but true sweethearts, and I was the AH. No excuse. I was a major crudhead.
Whereas, when my narc partners have never had anything kind to say about their exes, tried to 1 up me on my own personal developments,
DARVO af, broke into tears "i'm a monster" over tiny things, then played it cool with hugely wrong behaviours (gaslighting and foundation setting)
Bruh.
That flag ain't blue, it's red and you're colourblinded by your own hormones. Run.
Figured this out at one point because I'm generally more of a listener, often in a passive, non-judgemental way. Had some strange feeling about a guy who wanted to date me, so I stayed on the fence and kept listening until some very creepy stuff started coming out, and noped the f out with clear conscience.
Contradict them...their response will tell you a lot
The lackmus test is super easy.
Does the guy have a ton of female friends who he hangs out regularly? Just for fun.
They're just his friends? Are you insecure? What are you gonna do, read his texts to see if he cheated? Insecure red flag.
Don’t interact with that person who replied to you they’re a troll
Why is that a good litmus test?
About time for this conversation. Hope it's not the last. Time has come today.
The comedian Doug Stanhope once said, and I'm paraphrasing it (because he was talking about economic stuff but it applies to so much in life)...
"If you listen to anyone bitch ...for long enough, just let them talk, cuz you’ll eventually hear why it’s exactly their fault."
If they start digging down, quietly hold out a shovel and see how deep they go.
In all my experience (which. granted isn’t a lot but I go to a school with a high percentage of “nice guys”), the easiest test is to just ask them why they think they’re ready for a relationship. Or why they *deserve* a relationship. You can hear how much they’ve actually worked on themselves (if at all) and all of their reasons as to why they want the relationship they think they deserve will show how they really think about others and especially women
It’s a shame people can’t choose to be gay. Would solve a lot of issues.
Lol seriously. This is how I know sexuality isn't a choice, because I'd love nothing more than to be gay and have a lovely wife and a cozy country cottage.... But the reality is I like dudes 😭
Would be awesome
I remember in high school I would tell my friends. If you’re on a date pay attention to how he treats the server. The greeter. How a man treats you is not a good indicator because these dudes know what to do and say. But how people treat people lower than them socially is always the first thing I notice.
I have found this to be true, most people can't wait to reveal their vices and imperfections.
I’m a man who is a regular distance runner, my wife knows all of the women I distance run train with. I’m the only male of about 7 regular runners. Distance together over the weekend. I truly, honestly, genuinely love everyone of them and they all show me the love too. Key here is doing things together as friends and never letting it go further than that and realizing I don’t want to lose their friendship
backhanded compliments are one, like "youre not like the others"
yea no pass there are plenty of people like me dude
Seek therapy. That's not a backhanded compliment.
@xXJLNINJAXx telling someone that their entire group of people is shit and that theyre one of the "normal" ones is a not a complement
@@whatTFisThis that's NOT what that sentence means at ALL. And yes, it IS a compliment to YOU. Why you feel the need to become a monolith with a group you had no choice to be a part of is beyond anyone, but that is absolutely a compliment for you as an individual. Even so, that has nothing to do with the group you belong to, as it only has anything to do with all the one's HE has encountered so far. Hell, it STILL doesn't even mean that he's calling them shit. The compliment is so nebulous that it doesn't even mean anything inherently negative to the others, only that YOU stand out, for better or worse. He basically called you special, which, idk about you, but MANY women AND men would LOVE to be considered special by someone else.
The fact you twisted it to mean something completely different only tells me that you have unresolved trauma or SOMETHING that you need to seek therapy for, because taking that compliment that way is WILD.
@@whatTFisThis She says on a speech prof comment section, where women do that to men all the damn time lol
@@xXJLNINJAXx who gets to decide if it was a compliment? The one talking or being talked about? How is it a compliment if it makes someone feel worse?
never interrupt your opponent when they are making a mistake or something like that
That part about the crazy exes is a bit incidental for me because half were decent women that we just didn't vibe totally or grew apart. But I've also had some legitimately crazy ones that were, uh, not normal by any standards.
there is no benifit of the doubt for me anymore.... like its so rare i come across genuine guys...
like half the "genuine guys" i used to know have come out & arent even guys.
If they make me uncomfortable a single time i will remember it, & if i figure out why i'll probably never lower my guard around them again
What do you mean with they aren't even guys, are they (trans) women?
@@jdmmg4904 Probably, yeah. While trans women have a lot of internalized misogyny, homophobia, and transphobia like everyone else, we don't have the luxury of leaving it unconfronted. A lot of genuinely decent men aren't men at all, they're eggs waiting to hatch.
I think she means they came out later as trans women@@jdmmg4904
@@jdmmg4904 some ended up coming out as trans women some came out as non-binary.... all are notably not guys
You do realize we are all sinners right? Like if you are waiting to find a good person, it's not going to happen. Forgiveness is important.
Read their youtube comments.
The thing with "nice guys" is that they're nice as long as you're nice to them. But try criticizing them or angering them and see how easy it is for their niceness to go away. Because they're performatively nice. Actual nice people will still be kind even if you piss them off.
I mean isn't that like everyone? Who's nice to people who are rude to them, that just sounds like someone with low self esteem
@@nxrth9463 I realised this one fact: Everyone is projecting. They had their own experiences(good or bad or even average) then apply it in absurd proportions. I read the comment five or so times and I can't for the life of me understand how someone could write something so foolish.
I think the most grown up thing you can say is that your exes are your exes for a reason, but if you're not aware of any personal changes to keep you from being a toxic piece of shit after those relationships, then maybe dating is not for you.
That girl might be actually insane
"Let'em talk..."
Well, that's probably not gonna happen 😕
I'll never understand why anyone would look at a human being who can carry and birth life as inferior. You don't have to think thier superior but come on! That's a pretty cool skill!
Because to them, bigger means better. Or, if that person can probably beat me up, I'm forced to be nice.
Exactly!, " what did you mean by that "? Could lead to discoveries...
I think the best way to find out if a man hates women is by asking early on, "Hey, what are your thoughts on feminism?" And the best thing about most toxic men is that they are loud and proud about it. Makes it so much easier to weed them out.
Another one is to ask him, "Do you think the gender wage gap is real?"
Hope this helps somebody ✌️
"do you think the gender wage gap is real?"
Yes I do. Middle aged women outperform middle aged men almost across the board. its a damn travesty.
"thoughts on feminism"
Could do more to address the rampant man hate within its movement(talking about men as if they arent human and assuming you know how they think without talking to them isnt helping anybody)but its heart is in the right place.
@@madmintentertainment6268 yeah, definitely trolling. And with made up statistics too
The gender wage gap literally isn't real, and in cases where the men did make more it's cuz they were working more hours then the women.
@@alexmcd378 Did someone delete a message? What'd they say lol
@@mkay0630 no clue. That was a month ago. Maybe they got banned?
Honestly, most of the time, awful men will tell you exactly what they are. When they do, believe them
I was on the other side of the "bad exes"... I justified her so many times but when none of your exes want to stay in contact with you... It's impossible that everyone is driving on the wrong lane. And she even bashed me for basically having stayed friend with almost all of mine, or even having introduced them to their current boyfriend or husbands
The all my exes are bad, is a red dress made out of red flags... regardless of gender
Absolutely true 💯
To be fair, women were raised to not like guys either. It’s weird, because we need each other, but we are divided in every way. Age, race, gender etc. It needs to stop. We need each other.
Who? Seriously who are these people that were raised not to like men or women? I feel like I'm living on another planet when people say this stuff. There are occasions when this happens, certainly, but is it truly that wide spread?
@@ZeeNasteethe person in the video they’re replying to. The two in the video doing the replying.
@@randomuser6378 accurate
Cue the comments finding some way to bIame maIe failures on womenn.
Always easy to find.
Oh yeah. Though, talking shit about every ex can be a red flag on every gender, I had the bad luck to meet a woman like this. I still don't know how she managed to shittalk AND flirt with her last ex simultaneously, it's amazing.
Does this make you the red flag then?
@@randomusername3873 I guess not, when there is only sufferers from this person left and I was groomed by her at age 16, she cheated on multiple partners, much more, but what do I know xd
It's the classic "when someone shows you who they are, believe them"
2 things: the first woman said: most men hate women. Not some men, but most men hate women? That statement is obviously false, toxic and in no way condusive to better gender relations. Second:
'Let a guy talk and ask him what he means when he says something confusing or iffy'. Yes excellent advice! But this woman isn't looking to understand her partner better, just to confirm her bias that all men are trash. This is just as wrong as the Andrew Tate types of discourse, just more passive aggressive than active aggressive
Understanding someone doesn’t mean you have to agree with them😂
Also there’s nothing to “understand” about b1g0try by the way
@@wiglicious. uh, yes there is. if you dont understand something you are never gonna be able to fight it effectively. Especially if its an ideology. Thats basic bro.
If you think bigotry just comes from no where or other bigotry congrats. you are feeding the problem
@@madmintentertainment6268don’t talk to me leave me alone
@@wiglicious. you are on a public forum... You can just leave without being such an entitled child about it lmao.
@@madmintentertainment6268this applies to you as well, but with over a hundred comments like this on the channel, it's pretty clear you're not here for rational discourse
Man babies love their moms?
No please stop that. Mothers can and often are wonderful people that are very well deserving of love.
Statistically speaking there is at least one genuinely good dude out there who just had sh*t luck and all of his exes are legitimately horrible people
A lot of guys prefer the "crazy hot chick." I had two different men tell me that I was great but "too put together," and "too normal," for them. These are the same guys who likely badmouth their "crazy exes."
What if the ex was actually bad, though?
He's probably still a misogynist according to them.