r/Bestof My Husband Cheated w/ Our Son's 18-yo Girlfriend
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- čas přidán 9. 07. 2024
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0:00 Intro
0:12 Debts of a minor
3:42 Rough cheating story
"Sneaky Snitch" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) License: CC By Attribution 3.0 - Komedie
Cheating is already bad, but cheating on your spouse, with a girl who is old enough to be your daughter…. Let alone is your son’s Partner…EWWWWW that double betrayal
On top of that, he definitely did it while she was a minor
That man is making whole new levels of disgusting like the most crap sandwich of all crap sandwiches
At the very least he groomed her. @@FreedomHero4
Nope, her being young is irrelevant.
@@chiknkeinnugeget6755It's likely that he cheated with her before she turned 18, so her age might just be relevant
There was definitely some grooming involved in the second story. So this wasn’t just a spur of the moment affair. He has been planning for years.
And these creeps try to conveniently forget is, grooming a minor is still PDF filic behavior, thus making them a PDF file.
Oh he definitely groomed her, no one is that attached for someone they were only in a relationship for 3 months. Anyone who thinks he didn’t atleast have an eye for her before she was 18 is delusional
Dude fuck that notion, don't absolve that piece of shit from agency on her behavior
I suspect that's why he ghosted her at first. I could be wrong but I believe even if he really did wait until she was 18 before doing anything physical, if it can be shown that he was grooming her before that, he could still face charges. Probably why they both deleted everything older than a few months. Dude knows he could be really screwed if this gets investigated.
She only recently turned 18 and the message logs before a few months back were deleted on both of their devices. So yeah it's safe to say it was going on long before that.
"Debts of a minor" is a way of saying we didnt want to raise you so now you have to pay it back
Sounds like some sorta religious or culty thing. Eww. I hope OP goes no contact ASAP.
Title was titled in OP's name. This is Grand Theft Auto, and cannot be legally sold by someone else. Good on OP with getting them in serious legal trouble. They are despicable.
Sure sounds like a load of bullshit
And the cops have the audacity to tell you to beg the thieves to return the car to you
There are sadly a lot of lazy cops who will take any opportunity they can get to get out of doing work. Because the grievance was between OP and his parents, the cop was willing to bully OP that it was a civil manner so he could go back to sitting in his car.
Not all cops are like that, but at the end of the day a cop is another type of service job, and some people on service jobs will just do anything sometimes to avoid doing work.
Right?! I'd like to see that cop say that to a bank manager after a robbery. What an idiot.
I was once taught this rule: "Cops don't need to know the law, they only need to enforce it."
Police officers are not lawyers. They do not have the memory or time to look up and know every intricacy of what is or isn't legal. They get the broad strokes of the law only and, sadly, many abuse the rule of 'if in doubt, do not interfere' that is in place for any situation where nobody is under direct threat of harm.
OP should file a complaint with the station.
That lazy cop: I’d rather not do the police report so I’m just going to make some bs excuse
Poor Amy is in for a rude awakening once she gets too old for Paul. She's got 4 years at the most considering he likes 18-22. I also don't believe he wasn't passionately hugging her while she was underage, not for once second.
I don't even think she has that long. Either she gets pregnant and is no longer attractive to him or he gets bored of her and will dump her. It does sound like she has a support network of her mom and op so maybe she'll get through it but dang is this a terrible situation for her
He was at least thinking about it! Reminds me of that creepy youtuber Onision. He was always careful about not doing anything until the girls were 18, but he groomed them heavily before that point. It makes it harder to prosecute when they carefully walk that line. Either way, I’m scared there’s not much they can do with prosecuting if Amy refuses to testify against him or anything.
He brainwashed her well.
Edit: ah, looks like they did what I said. And it went about as well as I could have predicted.
It makes me sad that I scoffed when it was written that Amy said they would run away together because they were in love. She’s still so young and I’m not surprised she’s allowed herself to become so deluded by him. If I were OP, I would show her his tinder profile and matches and say, “you’re not the only one. I’m not saying it to hurt you, I just don’t want you to allow yourself to be hurt by this horrible scumbag you claim loves you so much. Don’t build him any altars.”
Only a narcissist would tell their children, some shit like “because I raised you you owe me”
Also addicts
They're addicts. My step brothers mum was like this. She was constantly asking him for money because she was an alcoholic. When he took his life, she quickly sold all of his things and fought for the money in his bank, whilst we tried to get his money into his sons bank. She also popped by his work, went through his desk and took £200 he had stored there (specifically so she couldn't get it). Addicts can honestly be the absolute worst.
@@nothanks1239that sucks… if that hits you close I’m so sorry
It is definitely a line from the Cluster-B Personality Disorder Playbook.
Apparently, also one from the addicts' playbook.
I suppose the two are not mutually exclusive, though do not necessarily overlap.
@@survivedandthrivingl know a few people who chose the career path of addiction and when they need money around the second or third week of the month they always try to play victim on the book of faces posting something along the lines of “ no one wants to help a disabled person!” Or something trying to guilt people like “I don’t matter to anyone no one cares about me blah blah” basically using the playbook of narcissists. Roughly this translates into reality as “ you should go to work 40-70 hours a week and give up your time with your family and friends and then give me the money because I don’t want to work” “why won’t you take extra money you have and give it to me instead of spending it on your wife or kids” because at the end of the day when I offer the easy solution in September and November of going to rake the yards of people around you for $20 it’s immediately “mah back!!!!!” Yet their back doesn’t hurt too much to sit in an office chair the entire day playing video games. Which oddly enough as i started my career doing physical labor my back hurts too much to sit for more than a few hours while getting up to move around. This is getting long now but I find it fascinating how people think you’re going to buy their bs that you should go to work with everyone else whose closing in on 40 like our backs don’t hurt and we’re not tired, and give up our time and energy for money for them to “buy groceries” with because they spent their money on an addiction they can’t afford.
Paul actually can potentially face criminal repercussions even if the physical part of their relationship only started after she turned 18; this is text book grooming and easily provable at that because Amy admitted that he was a mentor until she was 18 when he became "her lover".
"Grooming is not necessarily a crime, but it is a legal gray. Once grooming becomes sexual conduct, it becomes a crime punishable by law. Grooming behaviors may manifest differently but generally follow a pattern to commit a criminal act later."
And poor Amy needs to be de-programmed. Usually that’s used for victims of cults, but this situation calls for it.
So to clarify, when they say “once it becomes sexual”, they mean while the victim is still a minor.
The sad reality is the law hasn’t caught up our current understandings. As long as the sexual stuff started once she (or he) was 18, then there isn’t a crime to charge with (at this time).
@@theseyiit’s honestly such BS
One of my siblings was groomed at a young age, the relationship developmed to an sexual one when they were still a minor. Due to our state's age of concent law there was nothing my parents could do through the criminal justice system. The victim was also disillusioned like Amy and would defend him for years... They refused to talk with any law enforcement or be apart of any efforts too prosecute him. They ended up running away with him when they turned 18 and it became a domestic issue and we lost any influence we did have. We were able to get him fired from his job as a teacher when we first learned of their "relationship"... I wish there was more we could do at the time, the victim ended up coming back to us years later and then we delt with safety and stalking... The justice system is sadly just not equipped to protect victims in these situations. Please try to protect your love ones.
One of my siblings was groomed at a young age, the relationship developmed to an sexual one when they were still a minor. Due to our state's age of concent law there was nothing my parents could do through the criminal justice system. The victim was also disillusioned like Amy and would defend him for years... They refused to talk with any law enforcement or be apart of any efforts too prosecute him. They ended up running away with him when they turned 18 and it became a domestic issue and we lost any influence we did have. We were able to get him fired from his job as a teacher when we first learned of their "relationship"... I wish there was more we could do at the time, the victim ended up coming back to us years later and then we delt with safety and stalking... The justice system is sadly just not equipped to protect victims in these situations. Please try to protect your love ones.
Story 1: please report that dumbass cop that actually tried to convince to you that your car was in your parents name and decided grand theft Auto is a family dispute, where you have to convince the person that bought your stolen car to give it back. I don't know if it's stupidity or laziness, it's probably both really, and we really need to get them out of the police force.
Now about this minor deat or whatever the heck your parents tried to call it, even if it's a thing in other countries here in the USA it's not thing and it's completely ridiculous for a parent to actually demand to be paid back for doing what they are legally responsible for.
Debt***
Actually, I tried to see if minor debt might be a thing in other countries and from a brief search it doesn't seem to be. The closest I could find was a 1947 legal essay about the validity of inherited debts and whether the "Infant Relief Act of 1874" (infant meaning under 7 years of age) applied to older children. There was also a mention of Roman legal concepts which may have carried into civil law.
None of this applies to OP's situation, but my thought is that given OP's parents are clearly crazy and possibly drug-addled, it's entirely possible that they went down the Sov.Cit. rabbit-hole at some point and found the concept in there. Sov.Cits. tend to be "traditionalist" in a way that they could easily think that children are responsible for their parents (eg, we raised you so you would take care of us and if you don't do that then you owe us).
Story 1: For the China thing, this is based on a "Elderly Rights" law passed somewhere in the early 2010s to make sure kids visit/check up on their aging parents. There's a lot of BS tied to it because they don't define things like how often they should visit, what counts as a visit, and whether or not the major holidays are a requirement or should count as a visit.
I wonder if elderly abuse is common then, cause adding kid that don’t like their parent to a room with their weak and feeble parents doesn’t seem like a good idea.
Like any smacks to the back of the head any time might occur. 🤔
Overall it seems like a bad idea
Honestly they might have to enact filial piety laws like the Chinese one in most of the Western world, since otherwise entire nations will be completely bankrupted by the costs associated with elder care, pensions, retirement, and healthcare. China is smart to offload the responsibilities and expenses related to their aging population onto the younger generations, otherwise they would be bankrupt by 2040.
@@Kalossupremacy3356 Probably. I know I would be less than kind if I was forced to visit my father.
@@Kalossupremacy3356 Elder abuse is not common. There's often extended families living together to support each other, even in the cities. However, there's a cultural expectation that the children are supposed to take care of their parents when their parents are older. The one who is expected to perform this duty is the youngest daughter. But if they don't have a daughter, it's the youngest son.
A big part of why this law was passed was because of the work/school expectations often left the kids unable to visit home. Schools often go for about 8 to 9 hrs a day for 6 days a week. If they live in the rural areas, they often end up dorming closer to the city once they get out of primary/grammar school. This starts as early as 5th to 6th grade (10 to 11) and often lasts for at least 5 to 6 yrs. It's only if they fail to get into college or fail to find work in the city that they return home. If they do find work, then the 6 days a week cycle continues and vacations only occur during major holidays like the Chinese New Year.
The phrase "you killed my sister" comes to mind. Don't know why. Anybody care to help?
Story 1: What? "Recall back all the money they've spent on raising me"?! That not just illegal. That is downright illogical. Like WHO'S CHOICE IT WAS TO HAVE A KID IN THE FIRST PLACE?!
They probably (if not likely) thought they could scam money out of their own kids cause they had literally nothing better in their lives
Guilting your own kid over a debt they didn't ask for and guilting them for being born is the scummiest BS you can pull on them.
@@dracko158I feel like story 2 is a bit worse, but scamming your kids has got to be top 5
Trying to recall resources spent that was required to do _the bare minimum of parenting_ is a whole new level of loser. Wanting cash in exchange for the only instance they have that they did any sort of child-rearing is _WILD._
Perfectly logical to a junkie whose only thought is where to easiest score money for their next fix.
How much do you wanna bet in 10 years Amy is going to make a post about how her husband is hooking up with another 18 year old girl, and how she “couldn’t have seen the red flags”, and how he was such a “nice dude”.
I bet he loses interest in her sooner then that, either that or he goes to jail before they can get married.
@@superphantom100 I’ll lower it to 5 years as that probably when she reaches the age that he thinks is too “mature” for his liking.
As a parent with 2 adult daughters and adult son, ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING to even THINK about sleeping with either of my girls boyfriends.. Omgosh, 18?!?! I'm about to 🤢🤢 You cannot convince me he didn't groom her!! I actually feel sorry for Amy though...
ETA: There is an actress from China that lives here in the US that is wealthy and her parents sued her a couple years ago and won, she has to support them... It's sad...
How the heck did her parents win?
@@rithvikmuthyalapati9754China is crazy
And people wonder why the U.S. hates China it’s government is backwards and corrupt as can be even more corrupt then our own
@@rithvikmuthyalapati9754Sadly in China that kind of lawsuit is an automatic win for the parents. It's seen as the grown child's duty to care for their elderly parents
This is not all that different from social security.
Cheating is trash.
Sleeping with someone the same age as your kids is creepy af.
Having an affair with your own son's girlfriend is irredeemable, for both parent and girlfriend.
Edit: For the record, I posted this maybe 5 or 6 sentences into the story. Yes, I agree the gf is a victim in this situation & the husband is a p-word.
Remember the girlfriend knew him for a long time and since she was 15/16. And the post says Amy saw him as a mentor and loves him and wants to run away with him, which she did. She's been groomed - it's bad she's cheating on the son with his own dad but most of the fault is on the dad literally being a groomer/borderline paedo
@@andreaseverin1346I see both points you guys made. Yeah, she’s wrong for it and is definitely a cheater, but I agree, she’s 100% been groomed. While she doesn’t get off blame free, most of my blame and vitriol go to that scumbag who’s not worthy of being called a father or a man.
@@andreaseverin1346
Yes, I posted this before finishing the story. Basically only once the initial details were spoken.
@@theseyi
I also said my OP before the story was even 1/4 way done
@@andreaseverin1346Probably even younger, if this is in the US freshman in high school are 14 when they start and that's IF her birthday is before August- early September then she would have been 13 when she first met OPs husband
Story 1: glad OP and his bro are away from them
Story 2: Jail. Immediately jail
"Debts of a minor" these people don't just visit Delulu Land, they've taken up full residence in Delulu Land
They own a two-story home with a pool AND a beach house in Delulu Land.
Kids should NOT have to compete with their parents for their partners.. the son and his girlfriend.
The last story: I just feel bad for everyone except the husband in the story. This man is a PDF file on the worst level.
OP in the second story says that the messages between her husband and Amy only go back 3 months, like they both deleted their histories at the same time. Was Amy's 18th birthday 3 months ago? Just the thought makes my skin crawl.
Exactly what I was thinking too.
I was thinking the same thing
I know, eh?
I am hoping a computer expert gets a chance to go over one or both of their devices.
For the average person, 'deleted' is rarely as gone as we think it is...
Last story:
He probably waited till she was 18 before it became physical. But I bet, he did some shady stuff before like pictures and so on. He groomed her.
Now he remains in contact for two reasons: to control Amy during the divorce and because he put so much effort in her, he might want to "enjoy" her.
The whole BDSM stuff suggests that he is looking for a relationship, where he has all the control.
That last story is wall to wall YIKES. In the midst of all the grooming, kiddy-diddling, homewrecking and cheating, one part that angers me is Amy not even acknowledging the way she hurt Eric. I was kinda waiting for a part where Eric makes contact with Amy and absolutely rips into her but at the same time he's trying to heal in his own way so maybe it's for the best. If I were in Eric's position though, I wouldn't hold back on giving both Paul & Amy several pieces of my mind.
He brainwashed that girl. That's probably the worst part about it. Even if he goes to jail, he'll still be in her head.
Looking super young since about 13 when I was supposed to start looking older, I've also dealt with my fair share of cops and random adults who wanted to always take my parents side and treat me like a whining 5 year old. I've actually seen it done to others, too. The infantilization of 20 somethings is ridiculous.
I actually feel sorry for Amy and hope she gets help as well. To me, it seems clear that she was preyed on by a predator. Being 18 doesn't magically make you capable of understanding that; she was a child who was targeted and groomed by a much older, more experienced person who knew what he was doing.
That's true. But also, you know better than to cheat by middle school, let alone in your teens. Obviously that's not a crime the same way the dad's disgusting act is, but still. Yikes.
The 2nd r/story sounds like the movie: “American Beauty”, but way more twisted and far more criminal.
Lolita, Poison Ivy 1 and 2, and I am sure that others exist. Which says something unfortunate.
@@asmith8692💯💯💯💯
OP - Carolyn
OP's husband (Paul) - Lester
Their son - Jane
Amy - Angela
Story 1 I can't wait until the parents start questioning either OP or their brother about why they haven't found someone yet even though they already "owe" them money and wouldn't be able to afford a kid.
When she accused OP of Photoshop, the profile pictures I would’ve been like “I’m good, but I’m not that good”
Story 2: Even if he waited till she was a legal age, there is nothing that's going to convince anyone that he didn't groom her first. Even the naive 18 year old doesn't believe they're in love with someone without there being some sort of ongoing relationship, especially since she has been provided proof that he's not in love with her and she won't believe any of it.
I honestly wish I could tell OP or the mom to let slip to the cops that the man who has recently under investigation for having an ongoing relationship with a minor is still in contact with this person and is still meeting up with her. But the more anyone tries to stop it or makes her resist, the more she'll push away from everyone. All I can say is I hope one way or another she realizes this isn't love, and hopefully after the investigation is over they'll have enough to convict him without her testimony or interference.
So in china there was a case of a woman given up for adoption and her bio parents sued her for support after finding out she was giving her brother(she was adopted by a couple and they had a son) financial support for school.
And the courts sided with the bio parents who gave her away as a baby! She didn't even know their names befor this! It is absolutely insane!
That's definitely taking it too far. However, most countries are going to have to follow China in mandating filial piety if they don't want to end up going bankrupt from social security payments and healthcare expenses. China was smart to offload those responsibilities and expenses onto their people.
Stupid court ruling
@@agentzapdos4960 You know Americans would NEVER accept or allow something like that 😂 There would be anarchy and maybe bloodshed lol
@@GoddessOfThreeThankfully the UK wouldn’t accept it either.
Story 1 : I'm afraid to say that the "More serious cop" in the story might have been by obligation only and not duty. Cops cannot refuse a complaint you're filling. They "advise you" to not do it sometimes because it would actually be detrimental to you with the court process, but most of the time, it only translate to "Please don't give me more work that I don't want to do.".
He’s constantly talking about contexts instead of just explaining outright what was actually going on
And police wonder why they’re so hated nowadays.
Thing is most cops aren't dumb brutes. The biggest problem is the amount of lazy cops, because those are the ones who pull the shit in story 1 and they are also the ones who protect the ones who abuse power.
Just like when squatters commit breaking and entering, criminal trespass, destruction of property, and extortion ("Pay us or we trash the place.") The police refuse to do their sworn duty and say "It's a civil matter." Florida has passed legislation making it quicker to get the squatters out (three days instead of months) with Tennessee right behind- but those laws would not be necessary if the police were forced to do their jobs and enforce the laws already on the books.
@@ostlandr Yeah squatters have rights. Not really anything police can do abt that until laws change
Don’t forget the 215 unmarked graves found behind a prison in Mississippi. Multiple bodies have been confirmed to be people reported missing for years. The person that uncovered it was a mother whose son was hit by an off-duty cop while crossing the street. She repeatedly contacted police and her son had identifying information on him but they still didn’t inform her of his death until months later, after they had already buried his body.
Ah yes. You only heard the bit about the rubbish cop. "One doctor told me vaccines were bad. But a sensible doctor gave me one. No wonder people hate doctors."
I love these “best of” stories-thanks, r/Slash!
2: Husband is a certified creeper
Story 1: The parents are narcissistic 100%, but that officer needs to be fired for telling a victim to "work it out themselves" when they are supposed to help people like OP. But yeah, it's absolutely bonkers the parents lies about selling his car to scare OP over some imaginary debt they came up with. Glad to hear they cut them off immediately.
That last story. Yikes. That has definitely been going on before Amy turned 18. Just think about it. How much does it take to warp someone’s views on love and people around them to that extend? It can’t have been a quick thing
S1: The reason why that happens in China is because their dictatorship has decided that they can't financially support all the old people in the country, as the country is getting older and older.
The West is going to have to follow China in making that the law of the land here as well. Our liberal democratic governments can't afford to financially support our aging populations, either.
@@agentzapdos4960what a load. If we taxed corporations like they owe, we'd have more than plenty, but our Capitalist Republican factions make sure it goes into their OWN pockets instead. Stop corporate welfare, take care of actual people.
@@rachelwitherspoon4394 Exactly!
Story 2: I've heard of this story before and there's definitely grooming involved based on Amy's behavior. Like, this psycho saw that Amy wasn’t living the best life and preyed on her by acting like her rock, that happens a LOT.
Amy is blind right now, but I think in the future, she will eventually realize what a creep Paul is and get therapy
Sadly for Amy, she'll likely get her reality check when she 'ages out' of this creep's preferences, after investing so much time, 'love', and energy, etc. into him, and after alienating her support network. Or, worse, he could well marry her to be his new beard as he ends up treating her like he treated OP while continuing to pick-up super-young barely legal/illegal minors to prey upon.
I truly hope she figures it out before then. But, the level of resistance she has to even consider the idea that he is the wrong person for her suggests otherwise.
He preyed on his own daughter's friends too. Amy was just easy prey because of her background.
UGHHH YESSS hearing that the thief parents got charged and OP got justice was FANTASTIC!
Jeez I can't even begin to imagine how crushing this all is for Eric
There's obvious signs that Amy was groomed the whole time, so she is a victim, BUT she's also a snake because she did all that behind her boyfriend's back because she knew what she was doing was wrong. I just wish she had common sense to realize if her and Paul are in love, then why do everything secretly? Why cheat on your boyfriend in secret? Honestly, if Amy's mom kick her out she would definitely TRY to stay with the cheating husband Paul, and if he's smart, he would try to hide the fact that she's living with him. If he doesn't accept her then he will send her back to her mom's because he knows it would not only look bad, damage his case even more in the divorce, and possibly kickstart an actual investigation on him. But there will come a point that she will be sick of having to "hide" and come out with the truth, so in the end, her mom's best bet is to kick her out.
Mary is handling her thoughts and emotions correctly. She is feeling, expressing what she's feeling, realizing why she's feeling that way, asking others what happened to see if her feelings are valid, and protecting not only her mental health through what's going on but validating others as well. You rock but please give yourself time to rest and cry as well!
Eric is experiencing shellshock and I'm sure there are plenty of moments that he feels this can't be real, but he still has the fortitude to go get checked and get therapy. I think he's more than likely ruminating to the past of interactions and conversations that were obvious that he missed. I am hoping the therapist can show him that both his ex and his dad are to blame for this, and that's it because it could be the start of his woman hating era. Other than that, good luck Eric, you got this!
O.P. in this has handled herself well. The shock and denial is normal, but she continued to keep calm and look for more evidence to prove she wasn't crazy. She is well aware of what her son's feelings could be like and looked for the best time to reveal whats happening and what's going to happen. Especially when she picked up her kids, they both knew something was wrong because O.P. has such a strong and genuine bond with her kids. She even has compassion for Amy in realizing that she is also a victim. O.P. is going to be even more amazing even before she met that gross cheater after the divorce.
As for Paul, he'll probably learn not to mess with kids in prison but his life is over. Trash.
The amount of groomer husbands on Reddit is insane
Story 2 I feel so bad for Amy she was groomed from a young age and is being manipulated by this creep and he got her in this delusion of what he is I hope she wakes up to what’s going on and I hope OP gets him put in jail
I feel bad for her but I also don't at the same time
The first story reminds me of my mom. She started threatening to kick me out at like 13, forced me to get a job at 15 (literally filled out applications for me and made me sign them under duress), all because I owed her for taking care of me when she never wanted kids. By my senior year of high school I had two jobs, wasn't allowed to keep my paychecks and frequently had my transportation to work and school threatened as coersion. Even now, she'll do "favors" for me, then demand hundreds of dollars in compensation because I owe her. Don't be that parent. It fucks your kids up for life.
That debt sounds like they never wanted to have op and that he was a burden to his parents
Story 1 : theory is the first cop op got was friends with op parents which is why he didn't give a rat about the op problem..
Story 2 : WTH how can 1 stab his son and wife in the throat like that ?..
Update : sheesh op hasband has a massive S addiction and he watched that one ridiculous movie ( forgot what the name was called ) that was all humping and BDSM stuff..
Update 2 : of course paul the coward is gonna call the only one whos scared of him and not someone who doesn't fear him and could possibly put him in a bag.. once amy comes to her senses dont let her back into your sons life op..
Update 3 : amy mom has to throw her out the house shes a goner.. nothing can be done..
Probably but a lot of officers ignore cases like this because it’s a ‘family matter’
@@kaykay8855 out of pure laziness....
@@thetruth1816 that too.
Sounds like Amy needs a lot of therapy, too.
When Amy was saying he was her mentor and role model, all I could hear was “Groomer. Groomer. Groomer.”
First 4 seconds story 1 that’s not a thing ops parents are crazy and the car part is just a straight up crime that’s grand theft auto
2:34 oh dayum
In some countries it absolutely is a thing. And while this sounds like it's in America where it definitely is not a thing, it's entirely possible the parents are Chinese or something and actually do believe it is a thing.
@@wingracer1614 there’s a 99% chance this is in America but the car part is a crime no matter ware this story takes place
@@Codm22712 I don't know about that. I suspect China would still side with the parents. And as I said, I agree this sounds like America where none of this is in any way legal but also like I said, the parents seem to have some very un-american views of the law. I strongly suspect they are Chinese or Croation or something. Somewhere that actually does have those kinds of laws and customs. A lifelong American adult doesn't come up with this crap unless they are incredibly stupid. No American would believe this for a second
The mom needs to start locking her door and keeping an eye on Amy, the delusions mixed with her anger at feeling like she's being separated from her "love" could make her dangerous. And the fact that he was able to groom her so easily, he could convince Amy to do whatever it takes to save their "love."
You can't detain an adult against her will. That's called kidnapping oddly enough.
@@wingracer1614 If only they could have caught this POS before she turned 18. Sounds like he waited for her 18th birthday to start you-know-whatting her.
@@wingracer1614 I meant the mom should lock her own door, not Amy's door. The wife should lock her doors as well, for her and her children's safety.
@@thehogusha4342 Yes, that is reasonable.
In story 2, I think Paul is a pedo, but he keeps on the legal side of statutory grape. Amy has been groomed and it will take some serious growing up for her to realize the nonsense that she went through before she turned 18 the prepared her to "be in love" with Paul.
Even if he truly did wait until she was legal that still makes her a scum bag 🤮
Nothing in this story implies that Paul is a pedo, it sounds like he's into mid to late teens which would make him a ephebophile. There's no mention of any prepubescent children in this story.
"They have a right to recall all money spent raising me"
What? Based on what? What law is this? Who thought this even sounded real?
Who decided to have a kid? Did the kid choose to be born? Did the kid choose you as parents? Did the kid have any say in their upbringing?
Parents like this don't deserve oxygen.
The second story I’ve heard before. It gets more and more insane. That poor wife/son. Glad they eventually get therapy.
Story 2 someone needs to check his laptops hard drives because something tells me there may be some CP on there why else would his "world be collapsing around him"
Stories like that last one are why i believe the cheating party in a marriage should get absolutely nothing in a divorce.
I dont feel bad for amy either. When i was 17/18 I would have known not to get with my girlfriends married mom. Its wrong on so many levels.
As I've seen in the comments, Amy's reactions and comments definitely screams grooming. So id definitely bet that something has been going on a lot longer than was said.
I dont know about China,but here in Croatia you can be sued not just by your elderly parents,but idk their neighbours if they see that your parent is sick,cant move,cant feed themselves properly...You either have to take care of them personaly or get them into a nursing home,because thats neglect of an elderly parent/neglect of an injury in an elderly parent.
Nearly every country on Earth is going to have to implement such a law, since governments the world over are bankrupting themselves with their aging populations drawing more from social security/pensions/retirement plans than there is money going into the system from employed people.
The first story anecdote reminds me of the court case of the young lady who was given up for adoption and became successful and then later on her parents sued her for adult maintenance cost or adult parent child support and I believe they also wanted her to help take care of the son that they kept the court rule that she did have to pay the parents maintenance cost, but she didn’t have to take care of the brother, but I think if a parent gives a child up for adoption in this case they shouldn’t be able to come back and then reap the reward of maintenance when they didn’t even maintain the child to begin with altogether, it was messy situation
Story 2:
What a horrible man and an even worst husband and father.
It’s bad enough to cheat on your wife with someone so young, but to make that person that you cheat with your SON’S GIRLFRIEND??????
I have no words for how disgusted and heartbroken I feel for OP and her family. Her son was betrayed by the two people he deeply cared for. He is supposed to be able to look up to and talk to his father about so much…then this happens??
I definitely also agree that Amy has been severely groomed because if she’s 18 and has this much loyalty to Eric’s father, then this took place when she was at LEAST 15. Remember, Eric and Amy have been together since their freshman year in high school.
May OP and her kids heal from this catastrophic situation, especially Eric. The best thing to come out of this is that the dad was exposed for the pervert he is and he is away from Mary and her friends. Hopefully one day Amy will see the light. She loves a very bad man and a future with him will only end in heartbreak for her and loss of precious time.
That's just gross in general, there goes their relationship as a father figure let alone a family member.
Debts of Minor is some Sovcit shit
More of a Chinese thing, to be honest. There are literal laws forcing you to take care, pay for, and even visit your elders - if not they can sue you.
EDIT: Just realized he also explains it in the video xD
@@DaijDjan you are a prophet!
@@DaijDjan The West will have to enact the same or even more draconian filial piety laws as well, or else our aging populations are going to bankrupt our governments.
@@agentzapdos4960 yes. Force kids to take care of toxic parents they've cut contact with as adults. Force kids with barely enough money and time to take care of their own lives to also take on their parents. This is a bad idea.
Used to be the other way around, at least in New York State back in the '50s and '60. If your adult children ended up on welfare, the State could come back on you to support them. Mom's long term BF (they were together eleven years) at the time got hit with this. So he transferred most of his assets to his business partner. Later, when he tried to get his assets back from the business partner, she just laughed at him. He ended up renting his own farm from her. Dude just couldn't win.
the sad thing is I've heard a ton about 'Debts of a minor'. it's an abuse tactic out and out. The times I hear it come up are parents trying to keep control of their kid. 'oh, you're leaving our control, PAY BACK EVERYTHING FOR US RAISING YOU!'.
Kids don't owe parents anything for being born
I have a friend whose dad gave his kids a 'bill' detailing every extra curricular activity they took... horse riding lessons, ballet lessons, music lessons etc. He said they had to pay him back or they would be cut out of his will(and yes, he had money).
Something tells me the ex-girlfriend on that second story was definitely groom by the poster's husband probably from the time that the Sun introduced ex-girlfriend to OP and of course the ex-husband in the situation as well because no teenage girl is going to act that way about being caught having a relationship with a full grown man unless they've been groomed into it or they're taught that dating someone older is okay and even then that is still a form of grooming so thank goodness OP have the decency to expose her husband and also the ex-girlfriend to the parents about her behavior because clearly she's going to need a lot of help to understand that the affair that she was groomed into having with the ex-husband is not a healthy relationship you should ever have with somebody in general even if she was let's say older even then it's not right to think it's okay to destroy a family like shame on the husband 100% in my opinion and sadly the ex-girlfriend really does he know but those are my thoughts
Just want to point out that while this case absolutely sounds like grooming, it is not unheard of (uncommon but not non-existent) for a teenager to become obsessed with someone older even in the absence of grooming. Point being, your statement that no teenage girl would act that way is false. It's rare without there being grooming or some sort of sexual abuse taking place but not never.
Based on my personal experience, the way Amy is acting definitely adds up with their relationship starting before she was 18.
I agree it might not have been physical before she was 18 but there is no way other things weren’t happening between them.
So OP’s parents in the first story was hoping to use a made up “law” in order to use their adult child as an ATM and squeeze them and their brother of every cent they have or made!
The parents’ entitlement is beyond disgusting, seeing their own kids as objects to use for their selfish and greedy needs are just that!
I hope OP and their brother’s families cut all ties from this toxic set of parents!
Because if they tried to get their kids’ money AND stole OP’s car in a failed attempt at “blackmailing for money”, then who knows WHAT they’ll do to the rest of the family!
Amy is acting exactly like I was acting when something like this happened to me. The "he can't do anything wrong" mentality gets old eventually.
Or it doesn't. It's really scary for those who care about you because the more they try to make you realize, the more you go back to the person gr00ming you. But they don't want to leave you in this situation until you realize because it could take years.
2nd story: This is gold for a lawyer. And you know it's bad if this thought crosses your mind.
PSA - I've seen people repeatedly report that if you file a CIVIL lawsuit against people who've stolen something, it can sometimes spur particularly stubborn police precincts into action. Probably because something genuinely illegal happened, and now it's about to be on open record. It may not help everyone, but it might help some folks.
2nd story guy deffinitly a p word, and wouldnt be suprised of there are more victims
I notice so many cheating stories where the couple are married but the person being cheated on doesn't call their cell provider to collect all phone messages in the last 2 years or more depending on how long they keep them on record.
Story 1: reminds me of a case in China where some abusive parents sued their kid for money and won.
Story 1: Hope the first cop got fired for blatantly brushing off a clear grand theft auto.
Probably got promoted
Story 1: In Brazil you can do the same and also if you are a child taking care of your parents, you can sue your siblings to make them responsible to help you by taking care or paying you for your services. But if the child prove that they were mistreated or were abandoned then they don't have any obligations.
I’m 18 and I like “older guys” (20-24) which isn’t ideal but if a 48 year old man that I’ve known since high school wanted to “get to know me” I’d be DISGUSTED. That is foul.
Unfortunately, Amy will learn the truth about Paul once she’s older and he’s looking for a new victim. By then she’ll likely realize too that it wasn’t a lover she’s been looking for, it’s a father figure, which just makes this all so much worse. 🤦♀️
More than likely the reason their logs from before she turned 18 are completely deleted is because they started before that. If he was "just a friendly figure" before that there would be normal and innocent conversational history from that period. So where is it? More than likely they started sooner and when she turned 18 he convinced her to delete the logs and pretend it started then because "other people wouldn't understand our love". She was groomed hardcore. And the fact that she goes to a catholic school probably made that a cake walk for him.
I (18f) feel for Amy, I know how vulnerable you are at this age even tho you tend to justify yourself by saying that you "are an adult". Feelings can be so strong and hard to control, even more so if a power dinamic is involved... I hope she listens to her mom and gets out of the situation
My brother (27 at the time) met the mother of his daughter when she was still 15. When our mother tried relaying to our sister that they waited until she was 16 (age of consent in Canada) before getting sexual, she was like "Bullshit" before our mom could even get the words out of her mouth.
Omg when I was 18 and when any older guy tried to talk or flirt with me, I'd get nervous, not flattered.
Jc the level of delulu this kid is in 🙃
"Because if it comes out that they were before she turned 18 he'd be going to jail" more like the morgue. He comes across as incredibly spineless and it never ends well for people who go to jail for child related crimes. Also, theres no way he wasn't grooming her since she started dating his son, the fact she latched this violently to means there has to have been years of grooming and emotional manipulation going on
That first story sounds a lot like what a scientologist would say. "Debt of a Minor" really sounds similar to what happens if someone was raised in that cult and leaves.
Of course you had to release this today, when I just read the story this morning lol
Story 1: I would've loved if they tried to sue OP for "debts of a minor".
I’ve recently discovered that some parents have the audacity to start romantic relationships with their children’s partners… why oh why.
Also I’d love to see rSlash react to the cesspool of cringe that is r/AgeGap
I feel so bad for amy… that kind of grooming takes a lot of time to realize that you were a victim. Im sure it doesnt help that everyone is “against” her, but there’s likely nothing that will go through to her right now
Last story I was in a very similar situation about 12 years ago, my ex's mother was having an affair with the landlord, the dad found out, went to never wake up land by his own hand, she then broke it off with the landlord followed by him targeting her daughter (my ex)
This stuff can get real messy
I feel so bad for the wife in story 2. In the first few lines, she partially blames the marriage on her "aging badly." Unless your marriage was built on sand to begin with, how you look as time, health, and pregnancy take their toll should have little impact on your marriage, unless you just intentionally do something like have atrocious hygiene. Everyone ages, and how "well" you age is largely out of your control. It's also completely subjective. She said she has aged badly and feels guilty for it, and those types of feelings usually come from outside first. My guess is her husband has been criticizing her appearance for a long time and just wanted to use it as an excuse to cheat.
it's really cool how this mother cares about her children's feelings
I heard there's a way for the guy to get in trouble even if the girl is 18 so maybe OP can look into that.
"Does anyone believe he actually wanted until she turned 18?"
Yes. Because a dumb person wouldn't have waited. An vindictive person would...
We have a law like that in México, you can sue your offspring if you cannot support yourself when older
Story 1: I don't know where the Debts thing came from, either. Like, they chose to have children, so what's their excuse?
Story 2: Initiate divorce proceedings immediately. This relationship is not salvageable. Even if he stops now, there's every opportunity he'll try to rope OP into what comes shortly. Tell the son. He needs to know that the person he's with is a cheater. If he stays, that's on him, but OP has to tell him. CALL THE COPS! If she just turned 18 and the son had been with her for years, that means the husband is a groomer. He's in a position of authority over her so at best the relationship is inappropriate, and would be even if he weren't married. Put as much distance between OP and husband as possible because he'll probably try to say it was OP's idea to "save the marriage" or whatever.
Rslash may not realize it, but about half the states in the US have filial laws as well. And while they aren't really something that would land you in jail, can certainly be pursued in a civil court by your parents, and more importantly, by a third party care facility if your parents are placed in one.
3:12 As an Indian, I have to admit that this is mostly cultural. My parents don’t expect me to give them anything at all. No money no gifts. But I want to. I want to make them retire early and provide them with a comfort life. I know it’ll be hard. And they won’t agree. But growing up and seeing this happen when my dad and his brother took care of my grandparents, it just seems like a no brainier to me
The first story reminds me of this one Entitled Parents vid RSlash did about the OP’s cousin and her aunt. Aunt believed her adult, self sufficient daughter still had to obey her instructions, run errands and do other favors and tasks for her mother’s friends which she forced cousin to do as a child. Never for any pay. If anyone was adamant about paying, aunt would pocket it. Things came to a head when aunt volunteered cousin for something but cousin put her foot down that she wasn’t doing to do it and she had plans. Aunt stole cousin’s car and “grounded” cousin from driving. Cousin at that time was 22 and living on her own. She was able to get her mother arrested and got her car back. Aunt’s lawyer never asked any questions about daughter’s age or living situation and in court said this was a simple family dispute as the daughter was punished by her mother and got angry. When the district attorney revealed the victim was a 22 year old, it shifted everything. The whole story is absolutely NUTS.
The bit about Chinese kids paying for the parents in later life reminds me of a story I heard a while back about a woman, she was put up for adoption 20 or 30 years earlier, she became successful and her parents found out, and came after her for money to look after them now they are old, and the judge found in their favor, even tho they had NOTHING to do with raising her...
That she thinks Eric is taking it well is concerning. A lot of guys internalise their emotions, among them grief, panic and rage.
EDIT: forgot this was a redditor updates and wrote this too soon.. OP almost used the same words in an update.
Men aren't really capable of expressing emotions in a healthy way. They have no choice but to internalize and suppress all emotions, positive or negative, or else they will break things and hurt/kill people. It's just how men are.
Story one: The Debt of Childhood is a weird concept, but like you wife said about how Chinese parents can sue for support later in life. That is also thing in the US, it's called Filial Responsibility and it's a thing in 30 states. You can be forced to financially support your elder parents if you live in one of those states, and in a handful that even includes parents the child has emancipated from.
Your wifes info about china reminded me about a story i heard a couple years ago about a woman who was put up for adoption. She got adopted and raised well and she became a doctor. Her bio parents tracked her down, sued her for Parental Support AND WON.