If Bible Characters had iPhones
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- čas přidán 15. 01. 2019
- John Crist and Trey Kennedy break down what it would have been like if Bible Characters had iPhones.
John Crist is a standup comedian. For more videos, bio and live tour dates visit www.johncristcomedy.com
Follow John:
/ johnbcrist
/ johnbcrist
/ johnbcrist - Komedie
"How did Jesus get a blue check..he has 12 followers!!"
Abbyn V I’m so stupid i missed the 12 followers bit😫
Elove Xx 0:22
baGby Sepins I heard it but I didn’t clock the joke
Abbyn V oh duh, blue check. I didn’t get that at first 🤦🏼♂️
Abbyn V vertified of the eyes are God
Eve's asking for new phone recommendations. I told her Android's better but she's all about Apple.
Kate R She’s all about the dark side of life
Kate R, that's a great one!
😉
Omg yes
Shut up
When Moses got sick, doctor told him to take 2 tablets.
XD
😂😂😂😂😂😂
Okay that ones good.
And then he broke the 2 tablets. So the doctor made a new one.
😂😂😂😂😂😂
“I sent a fire emoji and they got all offended.” 😂😂😂😂😂😂 I lost it
Yes 😂😂😂
I've been to Bible study so much I got that straight away
This man is comedy gold
Hahaha that's the one that got me.... hahahaha that was hands down the best one.....man... I've never laughed so hard.....
I didn’t laugh because I didn’t understand any of the references, I’ve never read the Bible lol
My fave by far. Well and Lots daughter having a baby.
You guys missed the golden opportunity.
“Dude, Lot just posted on Facebook that they decided to move out of Sodom and Gomorrah.”
“Yeah his wife seems pretty salty about it.”
MOST UNDERRATED COMMENT, OMG!!
Omg this is golden
👏👏👏, bravo sir.
G-e-n-i-u-s 😎🤙🏽
Brilliant.
"Dude they're selling Joseph" "Can you do that?"
Kijiji
Level 100 trader
Joseph was sold as a slave in Egypt
Actually yes, according to this shit yes
⚰️
“Aww, Abraham and Isaac posted a selfie that they are headed to the mountains for a little father and son trip!”
“Amazing!”
“What could go wrong?”
“I dunno.”
“Wait, what’s that rope for?”
😂😂😂😂
Charity Zie That part is what caused me to especially crack 😂😂🤣
Lou Gayming read the Bible story
2:17
Wait what shouldnt that be Ishmael instead of Isaac?
Little does Isaac know that his father's almost gonna kill him.
"Do you follow Saul?"
"No, why?"
"He changed his username to Paul"
🤣🤣That's how I choked on my juice
I love how they mentioned Paul being in prison before ever mentioning his name change. Lol
A good one would have been "Which Saul?"
*If Noah Instagrams one more time about his DIY Project I'm done.*
🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😭😭😭
Samantha62 Chew62 😂
I'm not getting on that boat.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
And NO invite? How rude!!
"He only has like, 12 followers!"
Bruh. 😂
i didn't get that until now
12 disciples lollll
Lila Montoya Me either😂
I know right
make sense
“How did Jesus get verified He only has like, 12 followers”
STOP 😂
looooool
Lovely
I GET IT LMAO 😂
Xaxaxa
Who knew every reference?
I did .... too funny....
LMBO!
Shani Pottinger Me!!!
yep
I did you enjoy it more
*Im on Facebook marketplace he’s trying to sell his brother can he do that?!* I died.
OMG I LOVE UR VIDS CASSANDRA! I’m doing a 30 day vegan challenge bc of you✨ so happy you watch JohnnChrist too
Mikayla Grace 😍❤️💕
😅
Could've Used Ebay
You still wearing that colorful robe. Don't you think you need a new fashion statement. Joseph: Dream on...
“ If Noah instagrams about his DIY project again I’m done” LOL!!
I'm not getting on that boat...
"I ain't gettin on that boat" 👀
Why is it raining so much?
Edit: hey Noah can I come on your boat now. . . I’m kinda drowning
“David is liking Bathsheba’s spring break pics!”
😱
I got one
“Dude have you seen Ruth’s status update?”
“No, why?”
“She went from Married, to widowed to married again”
Accidentally hit the thumbs down button. Was trying to hit more comments.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
@@nsphilippe glad someone thought that was funny
When you grew up in the church and understand all the references. This is gold 👌
Same 😂
I grew up ATHEIST and I understood all the references! I just plunged myself into nonstop study using original sources for almost 15 years after I became a Christian.
The Fangrell lol true tho 😂😂
Right?????
Amen!!
“Bro’ you’re following the women at the well?”
“Is not like that...”
“Check your heart dude.”🤣😂 Too much!!
I've been laughing for 5 minutes straight bc of that last "check your heart" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
Cant stop laughing - even after watching it a few times. "Check your Heart " lol
Nailed it! 😂😂😂😂
😆😆
I cracked up!!!
"I'm in this group chat with Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego and I sent a fire emoji and they all got offended
Mb Doxa baby Christian here, and I just read a bit of Daniel.. so happy I got the reference haha
When Trey said "Jesus is on the way..." I was like "No boy, Jesus IS the way!" 🐟🍞
Yes
Jesus is on they way. AKA the rapture
Wwwwooowwwwww!
Aaaaand here we have the inspiration for the Bible verse lady.
You got that right mate! 😁😊🖒
"Wait, what's that rope for?" HaHAHAHAH!!!🤣
DeShiia Coleman omgggg
I didn't understand that one
Juan Ramon Abraham ties up Isaac, following God’s commands, and is getting ready to sacrifice Isaac when God intervenes telling him that he has a lamb to sacrifice in Isaac’s stead.
You had 666 likes
That's how God works. (Mafia meme
CZcams put something Bible related on trending... this is a first.
And it has actual GOOD comments. Its an act of God lol
No kidding. Hysterically funny without being crude. Well only a little.
Chuck Lin it’s because they’re mocking Jesus
I mean, kind of. His material is not really very funny, but I don't think John Crist means to mock Christians or Jesus.
@@chucklin9629 i think he is mocking though..
This JUST might be the best thing since Veggies Tales 💀🔥💯😭😂
KendullTheOriginal
What’s veggie tales?
fact
@@arandomuser9459 veggie tales was a Christian animated childrens show
loolll yeasssss
*Have you seen seen Lot's status update??*
*Soddom and Gamora is Lit!!*
*When Lot posted it, his wife got super salty!!*
Lol!! This is great!!
Damn tho lol
Good one!
Hahahaaaa this is great 😂😂😂
What happens in gamora stays in gamora.
You’re following the woman at the well??? Check your heart. 😂😂
😆😆
Dr Bob approves this username
I literally can't stop laughing at this part!!🤣😂🤣
I don’t get this one, plz help
I think it's about Isaac's wife Rebekah. Abraham's servant has found her at the well
I think the best part is that John and Trey are laughing half of the time at their own jokes! It makes it so much funnier because it's like it's not even scripted!
Also, I don't want to be that guy, but thank you all for the likes!
It may not have been scripted... But it sure was scriptured!
This channel is way too underrated...This is a masterpiece...
I have one...
“Oh look Solomon’s Getting Married Again.”
“Ugh. Again? How many does that make?”
“That would be 700.”
1,000*
It would be better if you said he's changed his relationship status.
Oh my God... Lot's daughter is pregnant. "I wonder who the Dad is". Haven't laughed that hard in awhile!!!
😂😂😂😂😂
Jessica Like I'm going to give my real name sammmee!! 😂😂😂
Too far. :)
I erupted in laughter!
The beauty of this humor is it’s universal appeal, which isn’t mockery, nor is it making light of the sin Our Saviour, YahShua, paid such an enormous price for... but rather serving a purpose - *to bring these things BACK into the minds of His people* ... to jog or trigger your mind to stay focused on His Word and things of the Spirit.
It should prompt the unlearned to study and find out what they missed, and it should powerfully reinforce the memory of the verses brought to light so they stay fresh in your mind, heart and soul. This also helps draw in those who might not otherwise hear - I saw kind comments even from those professing to be Muslim!
Imagine Father using humor as a vehicle to draw little children, older kids, teens, and *ALL men to Himself* through His Son, YahShua Ha Maschiach, our Messiah! And *using humor to create an interest and curiosity for His Word!*
No harm, no foul. As the *body* of Christ, YahShua, we all have different purposes, different skills - and it takes all different kinds of people to reach everyone... some will hear Him clearly through study, while others hear Him in hymns and music, and we should all hear Him in worship. These men are reaching to members not yet in the family - but who WILL be heirs of Salvation - as the fishers of men Christ taught us to be - consider that even lifting Father’s Word in humor makes excellent bait!
Let - Everything - your hand finds to do be done with all your mind, heart, soul and strength as unto God and not unto men.
Lol...this one killed me.
Leah Warrington Genesis 19: 30-38
Group chat with Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego (fire emoji) 🔥🔥🔥🔥 Y’all dudes are wild!!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
PrettySimpleMusic one of my fave lines 🤣🤣
PrettySimpleMusic I dead at this one 😂😂😂😂😂😂
Can somebody please tell me who those people are because I'm not familiar with them? Thanks!
don't worry claire theyre all fake just like god
allahu akbar
I love how he pronounced abednego incorrect!! 😂😂
0:31 Bathsheba spring break pictures🤣🤣 I lost it when they started laughing too
Reference? I’m just learning.
"Dude, Lot's daughter is pregnant, I wonder who the father is."
- - - I died when I heard that.
“Maybe he’s in prison again? Again?” LOL
😂😂😂😭😭😭
I've watched this video 3 times and the Jonah one get me everytime😂😂 "maybe he doesn't have service" 😂
ALastingBeauty that’s my favorite too!
@Legend Spryzen Requiem Jonah is saved by being swallowed by a large fish, where he spends 3 days and 3 nights until he begins to pray to God, leading to God commanding the fish to spit Jonah out
Legend Spryzen Requiem Jonah was swallowed by a whale for three days after running from God.
616 likes??
I don't get it😭
I DIED AT THE JONAH GOING DEEP SEA FISHING I love this so much 😂
*You're following the woman at the well? Check your heart.* 🤣
Yeah, I'm gonna need a part 2 on this
Yep. Or a series
Yes! Part 2, Please!
The beauty of this humor is it’s universal appeal, which isn’t mockery, nor is it making light of the sin Our Saviour, YahShua, paid such an enormous price for... but rather serving a purpose - *to bring these things BACK into the minds of His people* ... to jog or trigger your mind to stay focused on His Word and things of the Spirit.
It should prompt the unlearned to study and find out what they missed, and it should powerfully reinforce the memory of the verses brought to light so they stay fresh in your mind, heart and soul. This also helps draw in those who might not otherwise hear - I saw kind comments even from those professing to be Muslim!
Imagine Father using humor as a vehicle to draw little children, older kids, teens, and *ALL men to Himself* through His Son, YahShua Ha Maschiach, our Messiah! And *using humor to create an interest and curiosity for His Word!*
No harm, no foul. Remember we are the *body* of Christ, YahShua, but we all have different purposes, different skills - and it takes all different kinds of people to reach everyone... some will hear Him clearly through study, while others hear Him in hymns and music, and we should all hear Him in worship. These men are reaching to members not yet in the family - but who WILL be heirs of Salvation - as the fishers of men Christ taught us to be - consider that even lifting Father’s Word in humor makes excellent bait!
Let - Everything - your hand finds to do be done with all your mind, heart, soul and strength as unto God and not unto men.
To the *pure* at heart *all* things are pure; but to the froward all things are froward or unsavory... Another word for froward would be “scornful.”
*Psalm **18:26*
With the pure thou wilt shew thyself pure; and with the froward thou wilt shew thyself froward.
*2 Samuel **22:27*
*With the pure thou wilt shew thyself pure;*. and with the froward thou wilt shew thyself unsavoury.
*Titus **1:15*
*Unto the pure all things are pure*: but unto them that are defiled and unbelieving is nothing pure; but even their mind and conscience is defiled.
*Proverbs 21:8*
The way of man is froward and strange: but as for the *pure*, his work is right.
Dude you're a psycho lol. Love it! Definitively a series
soulfulpizza14 totally agree
Yes, please! This was great years ago, and it still rocks!!!! Please, please do another one. Please, please please. This stuff never gets old. 😆
Why is my favorite part when they break character and crack themselves up?! 😂 Good time, guys!
Mine too!
"Has anyone seen Enoch? It's like he dropped off the face of the earth...."
Texas Tea I’M DEAD
😅 Good one!!
🤣😂🤣
"I used a 🔥 emoji & they got offended." 😂😂😂.
Noah’s DIY project. “I ain’t gettin’ on that boat.” Lol
Good one! 😂😂😂😂
Do I look like Adam to you? 😂
Elijah Zielke i so desperately want to like this but it’s also at 666 likes and I’d rather keep it that way
Dominick Basso LoL that is crazy 😝
You look like you have a good channel for a new chanel
Krause Maker thanks bro!!!!!!!!
It has 14 thousand likes for this video
"I wonder who the father is-"
"Too far dude"
Lost it XD
Literally, #METOO!
I need a sequel to this! Please!!! There are so many more jokes y’all could make!
We all need this!
lollll when they laugh at their own jokes and break character 😂
Maybe he's in jail again
Again?
😂😂😂
I actually understand all of this... thank you bible studies. 🙏🏻
Went to a Christian school for 7 years so it makes it halarious!
Right. Those were great. I give them 3 Thorny crowns.
I dont get the Lots baby one? Explain?
@@GuardiansCreed Incest. Specifically, his daughters got him drunk and they both got pregnant.
Guardians Creed the babies are his...
Did you see the line on this Israelites Philistine game? They got this rookie named David pitching
The rich young ruler 😂...that does sound like someone’s rap name! 😂😂😂
“Bro do you have the location on for the children of Israel? They’re literally just wandering around. It makes no sense.”
😄
Hilarious
Lol
This was awesome but David and Bathsheba and Joseph's brothers was pure gold 😂
The beauty of this humor is it’s universal appeal, which isn’t mockery, nor is it making light of the sin Our Saviour, YahShua, paid such an enormous price for... but rather serving a purpose - *to bring these things BACK into the minds of His people* ... to jog or trigger your mind to stay focused on His Word and things of the Spirit.
It should prompt the unlearned to study and find out what they missed, and it should powerfully reinforce the memory of the verses brought to light so they stay fresh in your mind, heart and soul. This also helps draw in those who might not otherwise hear - I saw kind comments even from those professing to be Muslim!
Imagine Father using humor as a vehicle to draw little children, older kids, teens, and *ALL men to Himself* through His Son, YahShua Ha Maschiach, our Messiah! And *using humor to create an interest and curiosity for His Word!*
No harm, no foul. As the *body* of Christ, YahShua, we all have different purposes, different skills - and it takes all different kinds of people to reach everyone... some will hear Him clearly through study, while others hear Him in hymns and music, and we should all hear Him in worship. These men are reaching to members not yet in the family - but who WILL be heirs of Salvation - as the fishers of men Christ taught us to be - consider that even lifting Father’s Word in humor makes excellent bait!
Let - Everything - your hand finds to do be done with all your mind, heart, soul and strength as unto God and not unto men.
Lot's daughter is pregnant, I wonder who the dad is 😂😂😂😂
Star Shonnie i died😭
Had to look that one up quickly...seriously regretting that one a little bit lol.
@@thatguitardude4307 hahahaha it's a horrible joke.. but it's great
That's a "Lot" of damage
DrummerBB Oooooooooh 🔥
"Have you seen the weather report? 50% chance of quail." 😂🤣😃
Trump just tweeted he´s gonna appoint Nehemiah to build the wall.
GermanWorshiper 🤣🤣🤣🙃
Hahaha
Will hire some black Israelites (you tha black Israelites sect) to circle around the wall.
😂😂😂😂😂👏
Lusi N ain‘t happen seven times
BRO, I JUST GOT A VENMO REQUEST FROM JUDAS 😕😕
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
50% chance of quail!? That’s quality dad joke material and I’m stealing it!
Matthew Crawford I don’t get it😭😭
And it sounds like hail?
I thought it was manna? Or bread of some kind? Weird that I’d remember that and not QUAIL, lol. Although I like bread and it would have sounded delicious to me at the time. I never had time to eat before Bible school, and they always ran out of donuts before we got there. 😂
Amara Jordan there was manna but the Israelites complained they didn’t have meat so God sent them so much meat, quail that they got sick from it. Numbers 11:31
Amara Jordan it was manna but when they complained about only having manna instead of quail , melons, etc like they’d had in Egypt god sent quail to them and made them sick while they ate the meat
Numbers 11 is where you’ll find the story
I didn’t know if to laugh or repent 😂
We need a Part two please!!! Loved it!!
Moses' GPS...cross the Red Sea in 2 miles turn right to Mount Sinai. Continue 3 days through desert. ETA Thursday ...Recalculating, recalculating ETA 40 years...
That's because someone lost a penny and they had to backtrack
I died at "what's that rope for?"
I’m so glad y’all collabed, this was great 😂
I hope there will be a part 2. This is seriously epic
The breaks in character *KILL* mehhh 🤣😂. I adore you both. Thx for the uncontrollable fits of giggles.
Those are literally my favorite parts. They can't NOT laugh at themselves🤣
I know, right!! 😂
The breaks are my fav.
Sameee!! 🤣
Lot’s daughter having a baby killed me 😂😂
LavenousForever right! Straight skull emojis
Omggg how did I find you here??? 😂
Wonder who’s the father😂😂😂
That's a case for Jeremy Kyle
Savage AF.
"Sin City.
*Don't look behind you*
What?
nevermind"
"dude you want a bite of this?"
"Do I look like Adam?"
😂😂I'm dying!!
How about: "Dude, Samson needs to cut back on these gym selfies. But you gotta admit... his hair looks good though. #nohomo"
Hey that's nice.. actually 😊
They're gonna have a huge party at the temple! I heard they invited Samson.
Oh what could go wrong.
Aww that would of been a good one!!! Lol love it!!! They should edit in there.
Dude I heard his girl turned informant for the feds and cut all his hair for DNA evidence while he slept
😂😂😂😂
“I ain’t gettin on that boat” 😂💀
😂😂
Job's now started a GoFundMe (eye roll)
Came back to this video 4 years later and it’s still sooo funny. lol
Lot and his daughter would have been on Jerry Springer
Both daughters. Lol. Very funny video.
You ARE the father!
Daughters*
Can someone explain the “Lot” joke? I don’t get it
Lance Louie “ daddy issues “
Im on Facebook marketplace he’s trying to sell his brother can he do that?!
Hahaha. yep!!
Faith*
It was Faithbook
I sold mine hahaha no I'm kidding
@@valdemarvreeman8231 Wanna sell mine
@@formlesscorvid5336 why?? haha
We need more of these!
Best yet! Love when y’all work together.
Hahaha this is so witty. The Saul/Paul name change lol.
Pauls in prison again
Actually it wasn't a name change. Saul is his Hebrew/Jewish name, while Paul was his Latin/Greek/Roman name. Saul/Paul was Jewish, but also a Roman citizen, so he had special privileges (i.e. beheading instead of crucifixion)
Every joke is flawless. Lol
"Hey have you seen Elijah's new whip on his Instagram post?"
"Yeah the mustang? It's fire!"
When he said “Don’t look behind you.”
I died.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Ok who else has watched it more than once? 😂😂
Me! I saw it at his show last year 😂 soooo funny. I'm glad he posted it
😂 haha me!
me, i have watched at least 6x's now!!! i keep finding something funny each time i watch it...
Christi Nanez me, too! It’s so hilarious 😂
Devin Fane Me! 🙋🏼♀️
I'm done: "David is liking and commenting on every one of Bathsheba's spring break pics" 😂 😂 😂
By far the best!! LOL loved it great job
I’ve watched this so many times! It never gets old 😂
Too funny!! "I'm on Facebook market place, they're selling Joseph. Can they so that" lol 😂😂
Level 99 Trader
I lost it when he said *Abram and Isaac posted a selfie of them going on a father-son trip* oh man
Legendary vid, great job sir!
Hilarious! Can't wait for Part 2
"Lots daughter is going to have a baby, I wonder who the Father is?".......chuckle.."Too far!" hahahaha
Can you explain this one for me please? Thank you!
@@clairufo Lot's daughters had incest with their dad. You can read the story in Genesis 19:30-38. That's why he asked, "I wonder who their dad is?"
Claire Lot was the father of his daughter’s baby. How does people not know this?
"Lot's daughter's pregnant, I wonder who the father is?"
My reaction: 😨
"Too far"
Me: 😂😂😂😂😂😂
Oh, gosh! 🤣😂 David liking all of Bathsheba’s spring break pics! I LOVE IT!
Reference?
lol this is brilliant! part 2 plz
It looked like they were just free styling the jokes. I love it 😂
They know the Bible too well lol
you know it’s great to see actually funny content on trending
Caleb Shaw yes! The beauty of this humor is it’s universal appeal, which isn’t mockery, nor is it making light of the sin Our Saviour, YahShua, paid such an enormous price for... but rather serving a purpose - *to bring these things BACK into the minds of His people* ... to jog or trigger your mind to stay focused on His Word and things of the Spirit.
It should prompt the unlearned to study and find out what they missed, and it should powerfully reinforce the memory of the verses brought to light so they stay fresh in your mind, heart and soul. This also helps draw in those who might not otherwise hear - I saw kind comments even from those professing to be Muslim!
Imagine Father using humor as a vehicle to draw little children, older kids, teens, and *ALL men to Himself* through His Son, YahShua Ha Maschiach, our Messiah! And *using humor to create an interest and curiosity for His Word!*
No harm, no foul. As the *body* of Christ, YahShua, we all have different purposes, different skills - and it takes all different kinds of people to reach everyone... some will hear Him clearly through study, while others hear Him in hymns and music, and we should all hear Him in worship. These men are reaching to members not yet in the family - but who WILL be heirs of Salvation - as the fishers of men Christ taught us to be - consider that even lifting Father’s Word in humor makes excellent bait!
Let - Everything - your hand finds to do be done with all your mind, heart, soul and strength as unto God and not unto men.
@@racheljill8213 I highly doubt that this is humour and if it is it seemed harsh and mockery of Jesus christ,
@@IsraelCountryCube
*Titus **1:15*
Unto the PURE
ALL things are PURE:
but unto them that are defiled
and unbelieving
is NOTHING pure
but even their mind
and conscience is defiled.
*Psalm 18:26*
With the PURE
Thou wilt shew thyself PURE;
and with the FROWARD
thou wilt shew thyself FROWARD.*
*Froward: “(a person) Difficult to deal with, stiff-necked, unteachable, stubborn, arrogant, never learning, always finding fault, one who complains, is never satisfied, sees evil even in good things.”
*2 Samuel 22:7*
With the PURE
Thou wilt shew thyself PURE;
and with the FROWARD*
Thou wilt shew thyself UNSAVORY.
*Romans 14:20*
For meat
destroy not the work of God.
ALL things indeed are PURE;
but it is evil
for that man
who eateth with offence.
More of these please!
Omg these are too good!! 😂😂😂 Being a PK paid off, I knew all these references! 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
Lol got all of them!! HaHa best one. " Joseph and Mary couldn't find a hotel so they had to BnB a rustic barn" hahahahahah
di D that one was authentic😂.
I hope we're not poking too much fun as to be on the wrong side of God.
It's really funny but I don't know if it's appropriate to God, cos they're already too many scoffers the last thing Jesus needs right now is his kids acting all messed up like people in the world...
This is something you can not watch once😂😂😂
your right.......you only can wach it half way like me
So true😂
Facts!!
I watched it all I liked it and understood every single joke.
wise Human I’ve watched it about 7 times 😂
Part 2!!!! I love this
Hilarious!!! I didn’t want it to end! 😂
Where's Moses with his tablets?
Version 1.0 crashed. Luckily they fixed it in 2.0
Theyd be like ha look at moses still using a tablet! 😂
Funny that both versions could only hold ten pieces of information
I wish I could upvote this forever. 😂😂
🤣
“Hey do you fallow Saul”? “He changed his username to Paul”! 😂
TMI: Saul didn’t change his name. Saul is his Jewish name, and Paul is his Roman name.
Seong-Hwi Lee I was about to say taht
Seong-Hwi Lee ....that’s the joke
The fire emoji with shadrach, Meshach and abednego 😭
this channel is so lit, I subscribed after the 1st video I saw, and this video is just as entertaining