Becoming a Duck Influencer (w/ Danny Gonzalez)
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- čas přidán 23. 06. 2021
- How turnt is too turnt? Jarvis and Danny investigate the turnt'dness of TooTurntTony.
Thanks to Keeps for sponsoring this video! Head to keeps.com/jarvisjohnson to learn more and get 50% off your first order of hair loss treatment.
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If you like this collab, there's more on Jarvis's and Danny's twitch channels where they stream on a Minecraft server. Or Danny GAMEzalez on CZcams
First reply
Thank you for your insight Professor.
Incredible
thanks for the info professor mason
Or Jarvis Johnson! Pro
I hate that you're right about ducks not being able to have eggplant. They're part of the nightshade family and therefore lethal to ducks.
Well, I mean it is very obvious public knowledge that everyone knows.
@@TheAZElele -...No it's not?? Why would it be? It's not like people go around trying to feed eggplants to random animals. I personally didn't know that, and it's not like you're ever taught it anywhere. At most you'll see a sign saying not to feed ducks or give them bread at the pond, but it doesn't list eggplants??-
...Unless this is just sarcasm going over my head. In which case, carry on.
Edit: Twas a joke after all 😅 Apologies for the misunderstanding!
@@WhutADrag They were definitely making a joke💀
@@moeshrooms385 Ahh, my bad then! Stuff like that tends to go over my head in text, sorry about that 😅
Wait how come we can eat eggplant but they cant
Like if it's related to nightshade
Unless we can eat nightshade and no one told me
(I mean I guess you can eat anything once?)
i love that jarvis had no idea who tony was, but seeing him be mean to a fan once on twitter was motivation enough to roast him for 30 minutes.
now that's a man loyal to his fandom😌
Yes but tbf I don't think that's just a fan... he said it was his private twt so it could be someone he's friends with irl
@@psychopathetic5341 he has a private twt for fans
Seeing Tony roast a fan fills you with Determination. HP fully restored.
roost*
I'm aggressively uncomfortable with the bestiality TikTok. Why tf did he think that was okay
If you go to his TikTok now he is pretending to act like Jeffrey Dahmer or he used to the last vid I saw was like he glued his dad's pubes to his face so....
It’s almost definitely a gag, especially when you watch his other videos. A lot of them are barely even about his pets, just him pissing off his family and the ducks in the background
@Alz i feel bad for the animals too, but also as someone whose been around chickens they are very well socialized in the videos so they must be somewhat cared for. They are not naturally trusting like dogs, it takes work to get them that gentle
Edit: also not to say what he does isn't terrible, more than that I do think what he does is even more absolutely staged
@@bittercharmer1591 yeah as someone whose family has chickens, they have to be very socialized for you to even be able to pick them up. when I was a kid, my family had some that would let me pick them up but they weren't too happy about it. I'd imagine for them be perfectly fine being picked up that they're very well socialized. although I do still hate the way he's manhandling them still. :/
@@ghost-husband haha yeah, with the timid breeds like americuanas no matter how much I handled them as chicks they still don't tolerate beings handled. At least they don't fight amongst themselves like Rhodes
Being a non native english speaker, not knowing what a 'turnt' is, the first three minutes of the video is very funny to me
Being a native English speaker I also do not know
@@_____________a_a its 2022 tbh I wouldnt blame you for not hearing that word often, from anyone sane
also not a native englisian ;)
but i just researched it and urban dictionary said: "someone too hype for his own health", so if you where still wondering... here u go
bruh I have an "advanced vocabulary" in english and I have no idea. I heard it in a song once I think lol
i am a native english speaker and still don't know what it means
Jarvis got tired of just traumatizing his audience and is now bringing his friends to traumatize as well
🤣 like I could have lived my entire life not knowing this existed 🤣
I was already traumatized from the toilet food video
@@Musicluvr4 same, my life would've been so much better not knowing this existed
@@anosheep I dont like to think about that video, everytime I do, I shudder in disgust
That's what a good friend does.
“They’re not props they’re my pets” so you’re sexually abusing your pets??????
Yes. Totally Yes. 😖
Reading this at 2 minutes into the video is extremely worrisome
@@g3g3ify I’m five minutes in and same
15 minutes in 😃
I'm sorry w h a t
11:45 as a person who has raised chickens before, I can say he is not holding that chicken properly and probably in previous takes got projectile shat on.
I hope that shit got into his mouth once. Poor chicken :
deserved 😭
Well that was a sentence
I read that "as a person who was raised by chickens"
@@0Flow0 both
Danny just failing to come up with a joke and instead vocalizing for a few seconds COULD have been cut out, but Jarvis kept it in. Bless.
and THAT'S friendship.
I physically RECOILED when he put that duck against the wall. Just...NO.
I flinched and audibly gasped like wtf
I think we all did, it was traumatic
the fact that i relate to this comment is something i never hoped to experience. we have been violated!!
I started cursing when Jarvis did a parody of Heatwaves. Everything else I can handle, but you Do. Not. Touch. That. Song. (NOT BECAUSE OF THE FANFIC IDIOTS UNRATIO ME RIGHT NOW /j)
@@cadenceolivia6304 why, because of dream? that was a song before that fanfic lmao
"a boat with a girl and a chicken on it" literally the plot of moana
Oh yea
So leave her out there or...no? I wanna be prepared for when I see a boat with a girl and a chicken.
@@ThexDynastxQueen let her get maui and return the heart of tefiti
Moana is based on TooTurntTony? Creativity really is at an all-time low for Disney...
i was looking for this comment
as someone who loves, and is obsessed with my chickens; i am so sorry for that poor chicken he owns.
like ok giving a little kiss to your chicken is cool as hell i do it all the time, like you would with any other pet. but what the fuck dont pretend to eat out the chicken thats horrific.
Agreed, this guy’s sense of “”humor”” is genuinely disgusting imo
GROCERY STORE MANAGER: you cannot shop in a public store naked, sir. You need to leave.
TONY: fine. I'm far too turnt for this place anyway. Imma go bang my duck.
Basically summed up all of his content in one comment
Don't worry guys, he uses women as props too!
Oh well now I'm relieved
Phew, thank goodness!
Oh well ok
Phew
That’s a relief
Finnally some variety!
Thanks bro
i was so worried, thank goodness!!
If you harass Jarvis' fans on Twitter, he will make an entire video about you and rope in another CZcamsr to help him
Hmm.. Interesting (Pulls out a microphone) tell me more
Definitive networks combine versus rebels garrys mod server
And also we stomp them to death :)
Great, Some Free Negative Attention!
Tell me,are you a fan?
This video was made a year ago, but due to Tony's recent endeavors (hanging out with a missing kid, getting a restraining order, etc.) I feel like a follow-up might be a good idea😂
A missing kid what the fuck???!?!
@@-psilo-9071 yeah don't know all the details, but a little boy was missing for like 2 weeks and Tony found him and just hung out with him instead of bringing him in right away.
your wish came true
@@mammoneymelon thanks for letting me know!!
your wish came true again
I’ve never been more uncomfortable with a content creator ever in my LIFE certainly too turnt for me
Fr
I love how his crop top store says “worn across TikTok” but he’s shirtless in every video
Worn across other tiktokkers, I guess?
Adorable pfp
Someone else is wearing it
He sold all his shirts so he doesnt have any left to wear
@@AirLight1646 Thanks!
Knowing that TooTurntTony searches for himself on social media, I'm so pumped to see if a scathing comment lands in here.
That’s exactly what I’m looking for right now 😂
ExtraExcitedErin
how is there 2 comments with over 2k likes lol
I feel bad knowing I’ve also searched up my channel name when I was starting out.
@@leoultimaupgraded9914 subbed
As someone who has (for many years) had a feeding tube for nutrition, and a chest port (permanent IV implanted in my chest) to get my hydration, I appreciate Danny bringing that up. Often times no one even realizes people like me exist, so I was pleased to hear Danny mention it :)
do you agree that a feeding tube is a beer bong in a suit and tie?
Godbless you Spencer! this life is a vapor. but there is something much greater after this.or much worse if a person refuses the gift of Gods grace.but God entered humanity and died the death we deserve so that those who come to him may be filled with his spirit and be born again. this life is a test and not how most think. no matter how " good" we think we are the standard is perfection which is why Jesus came. truly coming to him and repenting is the only way to have salvation. he loves you!
@@yeshuaislord3058 you realise that's a super weird and innappropiate thing to tell a stranger, right?
hell yeah! what up my fellow chest port person, gotta love those lactated ringers
@@yeshuaislord3058 So God only accepts perfection and nothing less? Sounds kinda rude tbh.
PLEASE REVISIT THIS DUDE AGAIN, he's just gotten weirder
what happened??
@@vakarebaranauskaite6691 dude's doing things like using children and jeffrey dahmer for clout
@@lapetimarc oh. oh i see. so he’s smth like manni show??
@@vakarebaranauskaite6691 yeah exactly
@@vakarebaranauskaite6691 he found a missing child then like 2 weeks later after that he impersonated his father and tried to pick him up. He ended up getting a restraining order and got rlly pissed off over it even though it was deserved
I think you guys have it backwards, the ducks are running this whole thing and they're using tony as a prop
I love your pfp!
NO ITS THE MAILBOXES!!
I really prefer this narrative
Nice pfp
NON BINARY BIRB OMG HII
“The chickens should pull themselves up by their bootstraps” of course you’d defend Coopitalism
Omg haha underrated comment
They forgot to finish the sentence! With “that’s basically impossible”
👍 nice
😂😭💀
Bravo, you win the internet
Update on tooturnttony: he made a series where he pretended to be Jeffery Dahmer, and did it in public places as well, such as a hotel and stuff. He also has an OnlyFans
It feels related this is the comment I see when I was thinking like, how does he turn out like this, and then his parents are like that
20:07 seeing this guy have fake $3x with his chicken and duck honestly made me rethink my life choices.
i'm pretty sure you can say sex in youtube comments. also this comment implies you had been on the duck-fucking pipeline, but seeing this video scared you straight lmao. in which case - hey, whatever works.
Really? It actually made me feel more content with mine, because as questionable as some of my choices are, at least I'm not doing THAT.
@@No-ue5pi that's a very sweet way of looking at it lol
Glass half empty vs glass half full.
i am five minutes in the video and terrified. what is happening.
In case Jarvis and Danny aren't alone:
That's a duck. It's not nearly big or mean enough to be a goose. Its beak is too flat, and its neck is too short. Geese also have teeth lining their tongue, terrifying fact!
The sound a goose makes is as terrifying as it looks! 😭
The reason it’s white is because it’s just a white duck. That is such a ducky duck.
A goose once menaced me across a parking lot.
Very interesting fact(s)! Recognized and appreciated by Jarvis.
9/10
You can also tell by the way it's not trying to murder Toni.
guy who makes bestiality jokes about his pets draws the line at calling them props
hes the kids dude who would absolutely defend his ducks but would call women props in a heartbeat
LOL
HEL P IM ONLY 20 SECINDS IN IM GONNA CRY
are we sure they're jokes tho
@@irisworrall8253 id like in on some of that duckass
I went to his tiktok and got about 2 seconds in before my body wanted to do some self deletion. I have actually never seen content that bad before. I can not imagine what kind of evolutionary missteps the human race has taken to make this man come into being.
Underrated comment
florida
You guys continuously suspecting just a regular ol duck of being a goose is killing me.
Not only did Toni search his name to even find that reply, he searched his name with the wrong spelling. So he must do searches for every kind of iteration of his username which is so damn funny to me. Granted, the username on tiktok uses a Y and not an i, but still.
but his regular username was just taken by someone else on twitter though, why would he search the misspelled version
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
His name is with a y on every platform but Twitter. It is wierd but that is the proper spelling of his name.
Google has a function that notifies you when certain things (like your name) are mentioned online, so he probably uses that
Could he have just been searching for "ducks"? Idk how twitter works
The reason tony isn't wearing a shirt in any of his videos is because he sold them all on depop
lmao so true
this is so funny
💀
yo this dude just got a restraining order after finding a lost kid and then pretending to be his dad when picking him up from school
WHAT
So as per Danny lore he can communicate with ducks run marathons and possesses dream manipulation powers which allow him to become a sleep paralysis demon I think that qualifies him to be a superhero
Or a supervillain
“Get bent” is such a funny insult it’s like a fifth grader trying to curse you out without getting in trouble
It’s an old insult from like the 60s. Sit and spin is also an old one
He's all hat and no cattle!
@@jdominiqueca honestly that needs to come back with how well it rolls off the tongue
Bart Simpson
I used to say “get dunked on” like all the time
Me, a Canadian: that is a duck. You would never hold a goose like that and live to post the video
Canada geese are a different breed of satanic evil.
@@loveitftw Ikr?! 😂
Ducks are kind.
Geese are chaos.
@@claranadine1086 lmao yeah I guess there is a good reason for why they're classified as pest 🙃😂
Canadian geese are terrifying, I had a whole flock chasing me because someone completely covered the path in feed for them and it was a blind turn so I ended up getting way too close to them and they really didn't like that. I had to run through the entire park with a flock of pissed off birds chasing me while everyone just stared at me as if it was my fault some moron covered an entire path in feed.
I love that Danny is keeping a serious face the entire time. Like this is a very important and meaningful analysis of stupidity that needs honest commentary.
31:29 this is so cute and for what
This is random but we need more world-building in the Jarvis universe. What ever happened to Billy Shakespeare, Coffee Jarvis, Jake, Future Jarvis, Testosterone Johnson and others?
The JCU - Jarvis Cinematic Universe
LOL HE HEARTED IT
MY PRAYERS HAVE BEEN HEARD
Dont forget everyones favorite vsauce jarvis
@@fissionabledolphin THATS SO AWESOME CONGRATS
@@amayurubashaka3608 it would remove the heart so it’d be pointless
Tooturnedtony is the only guy who doesn't mind when autocorrect switches to "duck"
comments like "My duck is so hard right now" take on new horror after it's eaten those boner pills :-/
“Gimme that duck”
"Yippee ki yay mother duckers"
“Beep beep mother ducker”
@@dontbefatuousjeffrey2494 this comment section aiqhwnxmsbwjk
I find it both strange and hilarious how the women in his videos agreed to be apart of it but only if they cover their faces. Like they don't want to actually be associated with it but are still okay enough with it to participate.
8:52 why is danny fucking boppin' while this guy is downing a bottle of pills and jarvis is looking questioning/confused
danny is like "damn he's addicted to eggplant pills" and jarvis is like "how is this dude alive"
I see why tooturnttony is selling his shirts. It’s obvious he doesn’t use them anymore.
Surprised he hasn't started selling his pants as well since he never uses those either
@@gracievela7514 maybe he never has ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Squee I turned 999 to 1k I’ve finally made an impact in this world I’ve peaked imma melt now ✌️
@@tallulah.9143 I well I turned 1.7 to 1.8 so yea buddy not much to brag/j
@@tallulah.9143 Jee, you're not going to get anything better than that in life, you better have enjoyed your peakness while it lasted...
I never thought I'd see a duck say 'Yes Daddy', but theres a first time for everything. And hopefully also a last one.
Hopefully also a last one 😂
thought the title said "Becoming a Duck Influenza" and i was so excited
The Chs seem very stressed in 25:26 , poor chickens.
As a chicken owner, definitely stressed, and abuse, too much stress may have their lil hearts give out
This is the most heterosexual take on having a duck as a pet
I don't know how he managed to make owning poultry a heterosexual hobby when we all know it is peak cottagecore lesbian or alternatively city-living chaos bi
@@eliastalks7411 lol I love this comment
@@eliastalks7411 what about suburban pan chaos?
@@metro_mutt a very good addition, I would also see suburban pansexuals owning pigs and probably making them little boots
@@eliastalks7411 Panromantic here! I would 100% own a pig and make him small boots
How can he sell so many worn shirts, if he's never wearing a shirt?
Ahah triple facts
Because he's always selling them duhh lmao 😂😂
@Yengest or else?
@Yengest dang
he wears it once then sells it, he cant find a shirt he actually likes :,(
That duck is NOT a prop
It's his lover ❤🦆
I can tell that the fowl was a duck right away because I have a phobia of geese. They typically have black heads and necks and brown bodies, hope this helps you avoid the spawn of satan :)
Not All Geese!!!
fr though a lot of the european geese are white with orange bills. and there are a bunch of breeds that are known for being docile and friendly. look up an embden goose, if you can stomach it.
i believe it's the dreaded canada geese that are your nemeses - they are known for springtime aggression. as well as year-round aggression.
@@zubetp Yes, but they all look very similar in body shape typically, little fat fucks with long ass necks and tiny ass heads with FAR TOO many teeth
He reminds me of the college student who still goes to highschool parties to take advantage of drunk 15 year olds
You had 2000 likes and no comments. I just wanted to comment 😊
Him joking about having sex with animals is beyond disgusting and disturbing🤢 And he totally cares more about views than his “pets.”Animals are living beings not toys. Someone needs to get these birds away from him.
I 100% agree
It’s not the fact that he’s joking about zoophilia but more that he sucks at it
@@Oilspill209 nah whole thing is gross
@@tiffanykim2773 dude it’s still a joke. He sucks at joking yeah but it’s better than someone who gets offended at the slightest hint of something disturbing. (Like you)
@@Oilspill209, You're defending a man who makes """"joke"""" porn about his pet ducks. How hard are you gripping yourself under that desk?
24:50 danny's lil gasp omg
29:18 “And I’m not your bruh”
"Chicken lover" is a slang term for the type of gentleman who enjoys the company of young boys. Just putting that out there.
You know, you’ve somehow managed to make TooTurntTony look even worse than he already did. I didn’t even think that was possible
@@vanadium8865 Who?
@@pink_sock The guy they talk about for the entire video? Who makes out with birds?
@@justsomeguy5390 Oh. Yeah, I didn't watch the video. Sorry.
@@pink_sock ??? this is the strangest youtube comment ive seen
Thought this guy was gonna be posting cute duck vids or even just thirst traps w/ cute animals around him
Did not expect the beastiality angle 😳
Some people just choose to be villains
Wait...😳 what? Haven't got to that part so 🥴
yep same, i thought it would be kind of cringy thirst traps with the ducks around or things like that and i wish so badly I'd been right
15:30 this joke was so out of nowhere but it was so perfect
We need an update on the ‘lost boy’ situation because people don’t understand what tony did was illegal
This is the collaboration we all wanted
Fr lol
Very popular opinion.
7/10
It actually is. Drew gooden who? Kurtis who? Na.
YES
The one we want and don't deserve
farmer here. The chicken he is making sexual assault eyes at is a rhode island red rooster. The comb size varies by breed of chicken but you can tell its a cock by the feather pattern of the tail feathers. Roosters have what we call sickle feathers and its clear in the tiktok. Side note: my rhode island red roosters name is Melanie and he is a complete weirdo. Reds are super docile.
The more you know. 😁
I have two Reds (amongst other types but you mentioned them so I'll mention mine because chickens are awesome)
They're both hens but my little brother named one Thor lol
And there's Bandy (she has two bands on her legs from the last owner) and she's the momma (there's also a leghorn that's the momma. The leghorn has like 10+ chicks she watches, Bandy only has 3)
I love that you named the male Melanie, that's very progressive of you
Thank you for these hot cock facts
I don't know much about chickens and roosters, but my instincts were right about that one. Thanks for the knowledge. :)
4:39
I THOUGHT IT WAS “THE DUCK GAY” LIKE HE WAS SAYONG HIS DUCK IS GAY AND STARTING WHEEZING
Bro same😂😂
Now tooturnttony makes videos dressing up as Jeffrey Dahmer as a joke to "scare his mom" 💀
“I don’t know who you think you are shopping naked. I’m gonna call the cops”.
That was the most logical thing I ever heard in a TikTok.
Wasn't he wearing underwear? He wasn't actually naked, right?
@@orchdork775 Well yeah, but shopping in just your underwear is just as bad.
i know this is late but i think you're supposed to go grocery shopping (or go to any public space whatsoever) with at least a shirt, and pants
@@yeetionary you know what's funny is some places near beaches, like Miami, are fine with people wearing swimsuits in grocery stores. I think some areas in Australia too? But it's also common courtesy to wear a coverup, like a skirt or shawl
Timestamp?
Side note, that shirt brings out Danny's eyes very nicely.
And Greg in the background!
He's gorgeous
danny literally looks like those old painting of like gods
@@guyfierioverlord7637 I’ve never thought about that but yea, he does look like an old statue or something
@@thejasminelee oh my god yes
18:43 Missed opportunity to say “duck my head underwater.”
21:03 PLEASE IT TOOK ALL MY STRENGTH TO KEEP MY SHIT TOGETHER HERE
this is ducked up
heh i get it
Yeah that’s super funny
Pretty ducked up honestly.
14:47
17:43
I think TooTurntTony's used clothing that he sells is fake, since he doesn't wear clothes
Maybe he doesn’t wear clothes because he’s selling all of them.
@@abigailwollam6894 yea, but they are meant to be 'used' clothes, but he never 'uses' clothes
He gets dressed every morning but sells his clothes before he can even make it out the house
he sleeps fully clothed and goes naked during the day
his clothes aren't his props, they're his _pets_
30:32 Danny looks so offended... he is like Excuse me? 🤔
at 21:44 when you said “yeah he’s got quite a few ducks here” i thought you were gonna say “he really has his ducks in a row” 😭😭
and around 25:00 when you said “maybe he blocked us because somehow he caught wind that we were making this video, he heard it through the airwaves” i for sure thought you’d say “from a little birdie” 😭
So are we just gonna ignore Danny’s amazing Ratatoing shirt...?
That thing is probably worth more than gucci
he's worn it before, used to it
Judging by the fact I once made an unnoticed comment about it a while ago on a random video of his where I noticed it, either there are plenty other people talking about the ratatoing shirt and just noone ever notices, or Danny reeaaallllyyyy doesn't want anyone to talk about it..... Hmmm 🤔
I need that shirt hahaha 😂
Considering you can barely see half of it most of the time, yes
Well it's hilarious but Danny's videos are always like this for me: uh, nice shirt, that color of blue! I like it! Oh wait, he moved. There's a print on it, that's fine. Let's see what print...it's... a f*cking Ratatoing shirt. Okay nvm (remember that shirt with a weasel on it? I'm not sure if it was a weasel, if an actual English person could correct me on that)
Getting ducks as pets is such a disgusting trend, and accounts like this have only increased peoples interest in doing it, but almost nobody is doing proper research and they end up dumping them in ponds where they will die. I have pet ducks and it took me over four months of planning and research. So sad to see people using them for clout 😢
I hate it. My brother-in-law and his girlfriend got ducks and let them go in a pond near their house. She thinks they flew away and he secretly thinks they were eaten by an animal (I forgot what kind of animal but I think it was a mountain lion or something). Which makes me sad because I even suggested to my husband that we should offer to take them, if they didn't want to keep them. I love my ducks and would've happily taken in two more, whether they got along with mine or not, I would've gave them their own space, if they couldn't integrate. Ducks are amazing and deserve love and respect. My ducks are my babies 🥺
I also have two pet ducks and we treat them with up most care and did so much research. These TikTok’s feel really weird and I hope he takes actual care of them
I can never comprehend people getting pets on a whim, it takes me months of research before even buying headphones and people are buying LIVING BEINGS without even knowing how to care for them.
@@gwencere9383 I've seen this happen a lot with bunnies too. Like keeping them in a tiny cage 24/7 and when you tell them that's not how it's supposed to be they defend themselves by saying that they have other animals or not enough space when it's literally their fault they got the bunnies in the first place without taking into account that they need space and are also high maintenance animals.
@@gwencere9383 my mom got me a bird once out of no where and it while i loved the bird but it was difficult becouse i had hardly any time to do proper research and get a better cage and toys
Imagine being this guys family and walk in on him making a TikTok with one of the family pets and he just has it against the wall and is kissing it
Actually, imagine being the duck or chicken. He’s just a country boy trying to act cool
i love the "becoming a _____ Influencer" saga with danny gonzalez in this commentary universe!
"If you see like a boat, with a girl and a chicken on it, that's just sort of like drifting... maybe she's screaming 'I don't know how to drive the boat, there's a fucking chicken.'"
- Moana 2016 colorized
poor Hey Hey😭
I'm a little bit worried that Tony having his shirt off all the time indicates that he is the prop in his duck's tiktok account
that would explain why the reply to that random twwet was so agressive. The duck did not appreciate being called a prop.
New knowledge unlocked
30:42 Let the chicken pilot 👏 an 👏 aircraft 👏👏
Imagine being a duck, watching this video and Danny just starts cursing in duck
I'm loving the growing subgenre of Danny collabs where there's just tons of dead air after his jokes and no fast editing.
Who is danny
@@dylan2588 the one whose name is not Jarvis
@@radekchrabota nah that's drew
@@pardonthemusic pretty sure it's Kurtis, I mean nick
@@elianashaw8776 nah it’s definitely Sam
danny sarcastically said “you wouldn’t want your duck to get a boner” and i wonder if he’s aware of how correct he actually is.
Some species of duck (maybe all, idk) have corkscrew-shaped PPs so yeah I don’t wanna see that
@@Forestfreud Yeah, I don't think it's all of them, but quite a few.
@@Forestfreud and they're quite violent
yeah- i have a duck and it can be so bad 😭
@Abby H Several species of ducks form bonding pairs every season, but there are often more male ducks than female ducks in a given area. The male ducks who can't find a mate become extremely sexually aggressive and force themselves onto females who already have a mate. They've evolved a corkscrew-shaped penis that they can hide inside their body most of the time, but when they mate, they force the penis outwards in a third of a second, to a length of about 20 cm (1/4 of the duck's body length). They do this in order to get their sperm deeper inside the female duck's vagina than the actual mate. To counter this, the female ducks have evolved corkscrew-shaped vaginas that twist in the opposite direction of the male's penis, and often have multiple dead ends.
It's one of the weirdest and most complex sets of genitals in the animal kingdom. And it gets even weirder when you consider that 97% of all bird species don't even have penises.
Edit: I just learned that the female ducks can contract the walls of their vaginas in a way that makes it easier for the male's penis to go all the way to the end, which they do with their actual mates. This is effective enough that only 3% of ducks are born from forced mating.
I feel like if I held a cup under this video, I could DRINK the sarcasm dripping off it...f-ing loved it LMAO
Sarcasm juice. *sips*
21:30 did he draw on that chest hair im crying
No- 💀
30:12 Fun Fact! Chickens can swim (they can also float when not in motion) but purely out of survival and it can be very stressful for them. Putting a chicken in water and forcing it to swim is not endangerment though it is quite cruel and unnecessary.
I like that you phrased it at the end as “cruel and unnecessary”
From what I understand, though, they can't stay afloat for very long. Waterfowl have oils on their feathers that makes them repel water. Without the oil, feathers become clogged and drag the bird down. So chickens can stay afloat only for as long as it takes for their feathers to lose their pocket of air and absorb water.
Yep! All true.
I've known chickens that drowned in a water trough. There's no way they can float and/or swim. They don't have the feathers or the feet for it.
@@SallySueSaywhatagain I think they’re talking about the throwing a 4 year old into a pool knowing how to swim. They don’t know how, they won’t stay afloat for long. But they do bobble a bit before succumbing. And it does depend on the breed of chicken too, some are more floaty than others
"its very sensual, him holding that chicken" dear God why
Why are we here……….. just to suffer………..
As someone who is familiar with taking care of chickens - who the fuck would wanna be caught nearly naked in a chicken coop. Like no thank you.
This is not my first time seeing the video, but at the discussion at 10:10, I decided to look up if eggplant is actually harmful to ducks, and apparently it is.
Well the more you know
“if you see like a boat with a girl and a chicken on it” we’ve all seen moana, guys
Don’t forget the big guy with the tattoos.
lmao ahhh
I was gonna say “that’s a strange version of life of Pi” but your comment wins
Also there’s a rock
This guy is like Shane Dawson but has a thing for birds instead of cats.
And I oop-
At least he doesn't have a thing for minors like Shane...
@@poggerwhite we never know🤷♀️
@@poggerwhite and like James tbf
Didn't Shane only make one joke about that years ago?
Isn't this the same guy who kidnapped a lost child acting like their dad, and when the parents filed a restraining order against him he convinced them not to by saying he'd pay for the child's college and everything?
Yes, that is
He also acted like they were the asshole for wanting their kid back
I just thought the same thing!!!!
What? Like legitimately or as a TikTok joke?
@@ChildrenUnder30 as far as i know it was like...a joke? I guess? It appeared to be that he was friends with the kid so one day he just decided to pick the kid up from school without telling anyone thinking that wouldnt be an issue for some reason...and then turns out you cant just pick up someone elses kid even if you know them! Fancy that...
"and that's something he's never been accused of!" makes me laugh every time. excellent delivery
I am very proud of you for becoming a Duck Influencer, Jarvis. I have absolutely no idea what that is, but good job.
Very nice pfp
@@thedestroyasystem Why thank you
Double Trouble 😩💚
@@nataleigh8377 Yes they are our lord and savior.
Fairly simple joke. Made me chuckle.
8/10
The commentary genre is turning into a cinematic universe with all these colabs lately
Hello :) sibling
The ctu has a nice ring to it.
hi mason
Soon it'll be Drew's, Drew's, all Drew's
Drew: I am going to trust this guy that this is a duck.
Also Drew: goose goose goose
14:47 jarvis our of context
If it makes you feel better Jarvis, eggplant is part of the nightshade family, and although healthy for us humans, both the flesh and leaves of an eggplant can be fatal if consumed by ducks
I'm glad you and Danny voiced your concern for the safety of these ducks because a duck getting sick from the aubergine pills would be very bad news
And you certainly don't want your duck to get a boner.
lol I was literally looking for this comment
@@altaclipper very true. their genitalia are terrifying.
Depending on the boner pill, they can cause serious stomach problems and heart issues if ingested by animals. Vets have to treat that particular problem in house pets more than you might expect.
“How dare you cheat on me with that chicken”
- A duck with a guy doing thirst traps
28:15 I got the most perfect cut to a CZcams ad after the squeal 😂
Aaaaaaaaaaaaa- “Sara Lee bread can-“
8:53 that duck looks so uncomfortable like you can tell he is straight up not having a good time
I love how all the commentary CZcamsrs are friends with each other
All the good ones seem to be at least haha!
thats cuz they are all possibly the same person....
@@justalula7151 Makes sense, Jarvis looks EXACTLY like Danny
@@rebekanickell8451 you mean drew?
@Keyan Halfacre You mean Kurtis Conner?
There's incredible irony in throwing a public tantrum when a manager asks you to be considerate of other people and then calling *them* the Karen
THANK YOU
I knew someone would post this observation here eventually...
Karen is, at this point, partially is just what annoying people call people who criticize them. I called out a customer for not wearing shoes in my store and was called a Karen.
Edit: now that I’ve gotten to the part of the video, it’s way too similar to the situation I’m referring to
@@heathermorton3598 It's gone from being a specific label attached to largely white middle-aged women, who are leaning on assumed privilege to verbally intimidate and even abuse people (often younger) in service industry positions; to... a dumb-ass sexist putdown directed at any woman speaking out about something wrong.
It always had the capacity to degrade into a meaningless sexist label - I am afraid, for the sake of you and people like you, that here we are. Nothing more ridiculous and infuriating than being called a Karen by the person actually BEING a Karen!
Not to mention the fact that what he’s doing is literally illegal. Bringing a duck into a grocery store breaks so many health codes I don’t even want to think about it
25:53 it's the BUTT of the joke
sorry 🤹♀️
Its actually killing me what mf emoji is that plz