Tumblr Posts For the Shredder (r/Tumblr)
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- čas přidán 7. 03. 2024
- This HOOLIGAN has decided to crawl out of the pain cave to upload.
Oz Shorts Channel (Plus Streaming, Viewer Beware): / ozshorts
Discord: / discord
Twitter: OzMediaOfficial?l...
Go check out the artists behind the Avatars:
linktr.ee/star_smelting
x.com/Sarujelly?t=YMPBe0jsJI2...
/ birbplague
Links to Music and Content Below
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The Oz Media Reddit Collection: • r/insanepeoplefacebook...
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Music from filmmusic.io
"Apero Hour" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
“Backbay Lounge” Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
“Bossa Antigua” Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
“Crinoline Dreams” Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
License: CC BY (creativecommons.org/licenses/b...) - Zábava
Eventually I'll have a proper ad spot for this, but we got a sponsor with Gamer supps. use code OZ at checkout for 10% off. gamersupps.gg/OZ
(if we get enough sales we can make their PR team squirm with cursed degenerate stuff)
Triangular lady is losing everything. PRAISE THE SUN THAT IS YOU OZ.
i love jshat juice
OOH when do you think you'll get your own flavor
YAYY
i am broke
My favorite thing about Tumblr culture is that they've agreed the Gift of Prophecy is a red dodgeball
Every time I see a picture of a red dodgeball I can just *smell* the picture. Am I the only one?
I can feel the picture, right on my face
@@SamlazoloApollo favours you.
The sudden, overwhelming awareness of what is to come, as well as the certain knowledge that there is nothing you can do to alter the fates of those around you is such a thorough shaking of both faith and free will that one questions, not only, is there a divinity, but if it's not a cruel one that doesn't so much hate us, as find our suffering amusing.
The same sensation is felt poignantly when one beholds the red dodgeball growing ever larger in one's vision.
It is very funny cuz appolo is the god of bows so if it was a important prophecy you'd get an arrow
The soft ball is him fucking around
The Apollo dodgeball image is such a succinct way to fit the entire joke as a response picture and I love it
"Catch, nerd!"
oh we go further nowadays and just use a picture of the ball. no statue necessary
Picture of a sunny sky, but it's a dodgeball instead of the sun
i feel like someone should remake the baller image with an apollo character instead
@@feuerlingisnt that an SCP?
10:13 The fuck they mean Tumblr’s gotten hornier and kinkier? It was always horny and kinky, then came the imperialization of the anti-porn bots. This is a return to its roots.
Nature is healing.
Fucking *exactly* - where is my old horny tumblr???
Not if Matt Mullenweg has his way.
Make Tumblr Extra Kinky Again
I saw leyley and cringed
Imagine drinking acid instead of being called on your bs
Respectable honestly
Real
I mean, all of the doubts just melted away, no?
prussic acid is cyanide
@@skullzans...I GUESS???
James somerton moment
BTW, some further clarification on prussic acid. It is literally cyanide. This guy just straight up drank cyanide rather than proving his bs.
Why you didn't they just use the word cyanide then? Is this like how people say brimstone and sulfur are the same thing?
@@bland9876 Prussic acid is HCN. Cyanides in general are the salts of this acid. The cyanide used in cyanide poisoning is typically potassium cyanide, i. e. KCN.
@@usernamenotfound80 isn't salt NaCl and definitely not dangerous?
@bland9876 Salt in a chemistry context generally refers to the product of a reaction between an acid and a base, resulting in a neutrally charged compound. Neutral does not mean ok to consume. Please do not consume chemicals just because they are neutral, I have seen someone go to the hospital for being stupid.
@@masontaylor8002 You would think neutral would be like the noble gases where they don't do anything but I guess not.
11:44 A park ranger when asked why the trash cans were so convulted in the national park he worked at, said that it's to keep out bears. He went on to say that it's hard to design the trash lids porperly, because "The overlap between the stupidest of humans and the smartest of bears is surprisingly large" and if he makes it too secure, idiots will just toss trash on the ground next to it because they can't figure it out.
Some kind of passcode lock except the passcode is just 12345 and it's PLAINLY POSTED all over the can. It's literally just "you need to have the slightest bit of fine motor control and the ability to read numbers"
@@CaTastrophy427 I'm sure many people wouldn't figure it out.
@@CaTastrophy427 you underestimate human stupidity
@@CaTastrophy427exactly how many times have you tried to push open a pull door that has the word “PULL” written on it? People don’t read.
@@SYKRAL1 Excluding times when I was a child, I think twice.
Well, about 300 since the front door of my middle school had pull written on both sides but it only opened one way. I prefer to exclude doors with incorrect signage.
*quietly whispering "alcoholic" the microsecond lord farquaad appears on screen*
"this....
a relic.
a relic of a better time"
On the topic of national parks and how people die so easily in them, my own father once ACCIDENTALLY hiked across the Yukon river in Alaska while it was frozen over to get to a glacier and didn't realize until he was back to his truck and checking the map that him and his buddy *left in the vehicle*. I was one ice cave-in away from never being born because my father decided to fafo in the Alaskan wilderness *without a map*.
Here in Maine, no one will shut about about Don Fendler, guy who was on a Boy Scout trip to Katahdin National Park, got lost, and spent the next nine days struggling to survive on his own. He wrote a book about it (Lost On a Mountain in Maine) and was heralded as a hero and survivalist when if he had just stayed with his scout leader or actually been a good enough Boy Scout to remember the first rule when you get lost is DON'T MOVE, he would have left with his troop that same day or at least been found by search parties before the end of the day.
Dude has ridden the fame he got from that for this entire life, too. I remember him coming to speak with my third grade class about it in the early 90s.
@@ebagentj To give credit where it is due, he probably *is* a much better survivalist now than he was before the trip. Fighting for your life tends to teach you some things lol.
@@ebagentjBro literally broke the one gaddamn rule for when you get lost in the wilderness.
@@impishlyit9780 "Yeah, I fucked up, but here are some lessons for you kids for if you ever make the same mistake I did"
14:20
The number of people at national parks who think bear spray works like mosquito spray who will proceed to f***ING mace every single one of their children will always amaze me
as someone who has had to use bear spray exactly once, big yikes.
I mean id still get bitten somehow
“Now now kids, ready for the bear repellent are we?”
“AAGGGGH MOM EVERYTHING BURNS WHY HAVE YOU DONE THIS TO ME?”
Petition to rename it “bear mace” so fewer people get it wrong.
@@ragg232 I'm down
3:53 pidgey gained knowledge that it didn’t want and is forever cursed with it
*lacrimosa plays to widening irises*
It's Super Effective!
Gothitelle learns Dream Eater, so it can remove the dream any time it likes. It just chooses not to.
Pidgeotto? More like Pidgey OH NO!
I felt like it gained some sort of self awareness
As a Southern British person myself, I can indeed confirm the tap water here tastes like actual chalk and shit, and the water on the north is actually amazing.
Kind of makes one wonder where the chalky groundwater and the northern groundwater are physically separated. I’m betting that it would make a very uneven squiggly line on the map.
As a southern American I can confirm that our tap water taste the same
As a northern brit, yeah your water tastes weird. I went south on holiday and the chalk water was actually awful, I started buying bottled water just so I could boil it to make normal tasting tea
God, born and raised West Sussex, the tap water here is hot garbage, its a 50 50 on whether its visibly cloudy too
I must be an unlucky northerner because my tap water tastes like chalk too
14:40 This is part of why I like Terraria, because it has slots for both armor and vanity items. So you could be wearing a set of molten armor, but because you have something in the vanity slot, you still look cool.
Yea, like, if you are fearless, the spider armor, or, if you’re a coward, literally anything except the spider armor
Cyberpunk 2077's outfit system is also great for this. Nobody knows that instead of this western yeehaw fit I'm actually wearing a full bodysuit with bulletproof armor over it and the goofiest looking sci-fi goggles known to man.
Hogwarts Legacy does this too. When you collect a suit, it permanently goes to your vanity slot while the normal version goes to your armor slot
oh but like the molten armor looks cool tho
@@monkeeboy830I guess, but I like to see my character’s face.
I felt the national park thing in my soul.
Like my fanily went to yellowstone last year. The number of times we were reminded by various workers and signs to NEVER APPROACH BISON, was astouning because PEOPLE KEEP DOING IT!
They think, "oh, it's a big fluffy farm cow! It can't hurt! :D Lets go pet it!"
Bro. They are WILD ANIMALS who KILL. There are more deaths to Bison attacks than there are to bear or wolf attacks.
Personally I’m laughing my ass of at the thought of people screaming death threats at David Paulidus (did I spell that right?). Especially after enough time has passed since I first heard of him for me to figure just how likely it is that he’s full of it.
Even cows can kill people when they're mad. Domestication has made them less prone to violence, but the potential is still there.
Like that fun warning sign "only cross this field if you can do it in 9 seconds, because the bull can do it in 10."
Our ancestors had balls, looking at an aurochs and thinking "yes, I should domesticate that."
People make the terrible mistake of thinking herbivores are nice just because they're not actively trying to eat us...
@@feuerling ohhhh, don’t you get me started on aurochs, I am too sad because it’s not a species that died thousands of years ago, no the last known aurochs (they were from Poland) were killed by hunters in THE GODDAMN 1600s!
I heard “Starship Troopers” and I feel obligated to remind everyone that the footsoldiers’ armor from _Starship Troopers_ was reused as the armor for GSA troops in _Power Rangers: Lost Galaxy_
It was reused in a lot of places. The one I know about is a couple episodes of Firefly.
I knew about the other ones but I don't know anything about starship troopers director/creator
Mayonnaise was invented by a guy trying to make pudding.
Why the fuck would there be that quantity of oil in a pudding
@@personnemay2692 He couldn't find the cream he needed so he used oil as a substitute. The result was decidedly not pudding.
You know what I believe you, people are stupid enough for it to have happened
Are we talking American pudding or British pudding? If the latter, which type?
@@Daelyah The guy was a French chef. I don't know what he was intending to make specifically but it involved cream and eggs. It might be more accurate to call it a sauce but pudding sounds funnier.
Father
In my hour of need.
Thank you, oh possumed one.
HES BACK!!!
you must be really excited, huh
You, I recognize you
His front too
@@largo778 And his side
@@coriumfigs And my axe
2:39 how it feels when you have to do EVERYTHING in a science fair while ALL of your team members do LITERALLY NOTHING.
Like I have the research and everything has been made. Ask me to explain anything about it I'll just eat it and be done with it all.
Oh holy shit hi marrow
Sup man
@unlondon9806 this was my reaction as well when I saw this comment
You guys act like I'm not going to his streams lol
6:47 god i hate the fact that i know exactly what this is about. for once in my life i wish i didnt have context. being reminded of that wjole situation makes me wanna walk into the forest on a foggy day and just dissapear, only a week later to show up as a corpse strung by a telephone wire
It got weird when we got to the Third Reich pin, are you ok knowing the whole story? Do you need therapy?
If this is who I think it is they didn't even mention the part where a holocaust survivor commented on his tiktok and he replied saying he was sorry about putting them in a concentration camp
I thought that only happened in Inaba, Japan...
this sounds... familiar
@@epicfail7874 omg i know what you’re talking about, watching that as someone with intergenerational trauma and family members directly impacted by both the jewish and roma holocausts was fokin wild dude
14:58 That’s literally the premise of an entire King Of The Hill episode where Dale and the gang (minus Hank for legal reasons) dig a tunnel under Hank's house
2:24 ... The fact that the James Price thing was posted by Jonathan Sims makes it like 1000× funnier to me ngl 😭
he definitely read the wikipedia article once while looking for episode ideas
@@_mosscat Sounds about right
OH THANK GOD SOMEONE ELSE NOTICED IT
@@_mosscatiirc i think he mentioned in a qna before that obscure historic stories are an interest hes already had and he just implemented it into tma. knowing these sort of things is kinda just his deal (/pos i love this man and everything he makes)
OMG IM SO GLAD SOMEONE ELSE NOTICED
3:15 Kirby pause screens and Pokédex entries are pure nightmare fuel. Who wrote those?
Why must the cute, innocent Pidgey suffer such a terrifying vision?
Ey, so uh, fun fact, Kirby's current creative director, Shinya Kumazaki, spends his spare time creating cosmic horror art, so uh...yeah...all the creepier elements post-Sakurai departure? Thank Kumazaki-san for the nightmares. X3
That pidgey suffered the psychic-type lottery.
Also thanks Kumazaki-san, love them Eldritch Horrors beyond my comprehension
@@bluestreaker9242 considering he's retroactively tied a shit ton of lore together that was just random bullshit in the past? I love it.
@@nahnah390 Right? Love the complaints people give of "Oh, we're doing THIS again? Same old same old, nostalgia-bait," as if Kirby has never been one to embrace its past or something. Besides, I love that about Kirby (among other things): making sense of things that don't make sense, yet still make it feel internally consistent with past and present lore. It's literally called "Dream Land"; why WOULDN'T some crazy nonsensical random bullshit happen in a world where damn-near ANYTHING is possible? XD
@@bluestreaker9242 I'm honestly reminded of ishikawa on the ffxiv team with her ability to tie all sorts of old lore together, it's fantastic.
i always love how much oz gets hit by the whiplash from these posts. kills me every time
it's so weird that some actual media ppl are just... around on tumblr... Like i'd just be watching a normal tumblr reading video like usual if I wasn't experiencing severe Magnus Archives brainrot at the moment and my muscle memory didn't react aggressively to seeing jonnywaistcoat, aka jonathan friggin sims, just casually replying on a post about ppl being bad at fraud
I'm very proud of my "Unfinished Tabs" bookmark folder. I used to have it sorted by day, but that took too much space so now it's sorted by month.
By revisiting these pages I've been able to clear July 2019 up through the first half of September 2023.
Ooo! that's a really good way to sort them! I'll have to start doing that. Thanks for the tip!
Also the alcoholic meme sticks with me and always has. I go back to find it often because I love how you read it so much. I quote the way you said alcoholic like once a week.
Memories of the golden age I tell you
Alcoholic
@@q.s.w.9074 alcoholic
It sticks with me too but I can never remeber what viedo it's from and that bugs me lmao
@@Spooks98Gaming Me IRL.
I rewatch often enough. I have IRL, Tumblr, a Suspiciously Specific saved as playlists. Me IRL has the creation of Mini Oz.
@@samurexatlas7373 yeah but which one I also know its me irl
they guy at 2:22 is jonny sims, writer and lead actor of the magnus archives :)
A PODCAST DISTRIBUTED BY RUSTY QUILL?!
@@Marcario under a creative commons attributions non-commercial sharealike 4.0 international licence even
SOMEONE ELSE NOTICED
Yeah we turned Jonny into a tumblrina
2:31 [squints] Jonathan Sims? What are you doing in my falafel
My reaction fr, what is he doing here
12:56
As someone who works with bison regularly the mothers will stop at nothing they'll clear 6' fences and ran cars and tractors if separated from they're calves and the lead male will protect his favourite female
Don't fuck with bison please
7:42 I started looking up every single name that I've made for a character. Why? Well, I had a friend read through a story of mine. She mentioned to me that I named a character after a serial killer. I don't care how small of a role they have, every character is getting googled now. I ended up switching the character's last name and it came through without issue.
4:51 Never speak to me or my tabs again
Don't talk to me or my 72 tabs again
Don't talk to me or my dedicated Ao3 tab on Brave ever again
7:22 huh. I didn't know Felix used to cosplay as Mary Poppins.
you learn something new every day.
7:40 awkward story.
So, in a D&D campaign, I wanted the main country to have a Germanic name. So, I went with "sieghell" entirely forgetting that that's very close to a very very bad thing.
11:01
Ah yes, the exact way I used to be. "Okay so I clearly find other girls attractive, but I'm not _supposed_ to find girls attractive so I simply will not acknowledge it. That surely won't make me miserable at all :)"
Hope you're in a better place in life, my dude. ✌️
@@Daelyah thanks, I'm more or less fine these days ^-^ Still can't be out to my parents, but I'm out to my friend and brother, so that's better than nothing I guess ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
It was just hard going to a christian school for all of high school when I started questioning myself and constantly being worried that what I was feeling was "wrong"
I feel that potion hoarder bit so much. I have over 100 potions of ultimate healing in my chest in Skyrim. I have mastered Restoration, I have mastered Alchemy. I even sold my soul to Hircine and become a furr- I mean werewolf, just so I have alternative methods of healing, INCLUDING EATING THE HEARTS OF MY ENEMIES, just so I don't have to use those potions 😂
7:30 the star wars universe has sooooo many names that are slurs in brazilian portuguese that I legit think there is a brazilian in the crew intentionally creating them
It’s fucking crazy that I’ve seen 70% of these posts on my own dash. The perks of becoming a tumblridian
2:26 JONATHAN SIMS SPOTTED
I literally saw that and yelled Jarchavist sighting 😭
2:21 oh hey that's horror author jonny sims. hi horror author jonny sims
Not to be confused with Johnny sins (a mistake I have made multiple times)
The scrongly one has been released from the basement once more
I WAS LITERALLY JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW YOU HAVEN'T POSTED IN A WHILE!!!! Love your videos as always Oz!!!!
4:16 meanwhile the Xatu is perfectly fine because this sort of thing is normal for him
Existential Dread is an average Monday for'em
It's canon that Xatu gets a nonstop feed of Worst Timline shit.
If you send that seal to the shredder, you and I will have some issues. I'm never letting my son watch your content again.
James on the Tv what ever will he watch
Then I will do it.
😮 oh i thought that was a chuncky fuzzy nugget🤔.
I mean i guess blubber nuggets could work 🤷🏿♂️
14:52 to quote the topic-relevant CZcamsr ProZD "It's my ass-kicking outfit, bitch!"
7:27 i forgot ranboo had a tumblr
Completely random ranboo jumpscare in an oz vid, love it
Both ranboo and Johnny sims jumpscares happen in this video, them and niel gaiman just sorta exist on tumblr
@mothgirl326 Johnny sims? Time to find out who that is
The Pidgey drawing broke my heart for some reason he is so SMALL AND SCARED
6:07 oh hello tumblr user soliuss! Love your bungo stray dogs fanfiction!
I’m gonna publish a paper in a scientific journal on how I make gold out of discarded dentures and then throw myself in the Yellowstone caldera when I’m inevitably asked to show my work.
5:29 we can only image the existential dread of a guy that was kinda funny in middle school
HELLO OZ, I HAVE COME TO NOT ONLY ENJOY YOUR VIDEO BUT TO SHARE THIS FACT WITH YOU:
I like trains.
The Pidgey who has seen the heat death of the universe is now my back ground picture
5:05 one of tumblr's old demons crawled out its cell, demanding to be remembered
The post about the Hitler guy was just an audible flashbang that I was definitely not prepared for
The dwarven urge to tunnel is strong in this one.
10:00
Tumblr discovers England exists
No it doesn't
Lesson learned! Don't watch this video while cooking. I almost fell into my oven like a witch getting tricked by children.
Oh, hey! At 2:26 , jonnywaistcoat is Jonathan Sims from The Magnus Archives/Magnus Protocol podcast! Dude's hilarious.
8:42 Oz, I regret to inform you that owls can’t actually cross their legs. It’s just the pattern of the feathers making it look like that’s what’s happening.
8:18
I’m not surprised by the fact that Tumblr can just pull out a quote from the Communist Manifesto for just the most random shit. They really seem to know it by heart
(This might be from a different source, in which case, I don’t care)
0:08 My mother actually ate pizza with mayonnaise once. It was homemade pizza, but we did not put the mayo on the pizza before we put it in the oven, my mother put mayo on the pizza after we started eating the pizza. Tbh, she puts mayonnaise on almost anything as far as i know.
HE'S HERE!! HE'S BACK!! THE KING!!
2:21 GOD DAMN IT ITS JONNY SIMS!! WHY IS THIS MAN EVERYWHERE!!!
13:38 is literally me being called out, Born & raised a sadist & Alaskan.
0:55 how's his wife holding up?
To shreds, you say?
16:00 Don't forget the radiation. The levels are beyond safe
The wonderful Wizard of Oz has returned...
Price wasted absolutely no time escalating the hell out of that situation. Man probably wasn’t even going to jail for being exposed. He probably would’ve just lost his credibility
To add to the part in about 2:40, at least 3 elements were made up by one guy who used his own system and tools to find them with their group in a lab. Each time that a new element was found, he was the only person capable of using and understanding the data from that machine. And it WORKED multiple times because he got lucky in his reports and the element which he made up ended up being real!
2:20
Mr. Sims is back at it again
2:45 the fact that that is THE Johnny now working on a horror series involving alchemy is HILARIOUS and terrifying.
Missed you Oz
OZ OZ OZ OZ OZ OZ..... Ah man, you can't really imagine how much it means to me to hear your voice after such a day. You always supply me with the amount of caothic energy, laughs and down right happiness, that makes me going. Keep up the good work, and I hope, you are well and fine! Love ya and will always do. An even though you might not see this, I hope everything is going well for you!
How dare you remind me about the Felix Cipher situation 😭😭
PANR has tuned in.
Heya PANR!
PAcific Northwest tRee octopus
@@sircrumbfan morning friend, how're you holding up?
@jamestouchette859 who told you?
@@postapocalypticnewsradio Good afternoon I'm doing good! Hbu?
Fun fact about googling what you make up: I thought I was being original at 18 yrs old in 2008 when I made Hezrou. It was a dnd demon frog thing. I had no idea. Someone asked if I liked dnd. Nope. Never played it and at the time never heard of it. Dhiaga? I just wanted it as a surname for another game and I didn't have a last name yet. So I made it up. I found out a month ago it is Irish for divine.
I also learned hezrou is Arabic for "to caution". My name means "Divine Warning" which weirdly became a meme in my friend group because I am the one who literally warns people that their new friend's vibe is off and is a bad egg or a narcissist. It's so stupidly fitting that I don't know if I should feel proud of myself, or extremely pissed that you can't make anything up anymore without it being literally something else lmaooo we are a hive mind I stg 😂
5:22 I have been exiled many times. I always respond with demons and cosmic horrors beyond compression
Your farts are not that bad Kelly
THE POSSUM KING COMETH!!! ALL HAIL HIS RETURN WITH OFFERINGS OF CHEESE STICKS.
Absolute Oz classic (I Havent even watched it yet)
11:38 is now my favorite post to ever show up on r/tumblr.
When the reasons for people dying at parks are more unhinged than tumblr
It’s so good to have you back, especially after everything that you’ve been through. 😊
Nice to see a new post from you, made me laugh as your content usually does. Hope that you're doing well and looking after yourself and eating properly and sleeping well. Stay happy Oz, we love you.
Even worse about Pidgey seeing the end of all things is that
Pidgey isn't just one of those pokemon where theyre the equivalent to an animal niche in our world so they aren't intelligent enough to understand what the heat end is, but its also a BABY pokemon
Gothitelle just gave existential PTSD to an INFANT BIRD
The real tough choice of video games:
This armor will give you a boost to your max HP but drop your attack damage, where as this other armor will grant you a boost to your attack damage but will drop your max HP
7:57 I didn't do this a few times and now I have a character named after a place in like, Australia I think?
And one named after a type of car or car company idk
13:28 im pretty sure thats just the plot to monument mythos
4:29 oh no questions asked this is the biggest call out to me ever i dont think i will ever get called out bigger then this post
Y'know, for a split second, I thought you were talking about the free will one.
So the 12:01 national parks thing some people who are really good hikers and mountain climbers just going poof
14:45 had that come up recently
had an item that would half all damage during a fight, but you usually only get 4 of them in total
and we knew exactly which fights ahead of us would be the toughest
*yet didn't use the item at all until the second new game+*
15:30 "It's a long way to *clink* Tipperary, it's a *clink* long way to go ...." ~ Crow T. Robot, MST3K the Movie.
This truly an epic Mini-Oz Special moment
7:35 I posted a tiktok some time ago with same advice, because I found one of the countries I made up, the word I had made up was a slur.
16:08 she probably knows it might create a sinkhole so she’s doing because she hates her neighbors which would be extreme lengths to go through just to destroy someone you hate. But in the end, who knows why she’s digging a tunnel
1:31 the only thing I have to say about this one… Is Flint Michigan
4:21
thanks for sharing, put please don't ever again
2:51 uh my girlfriend is related to this dude-
1:18 I smelt that, I could smell a 1 or 2 second clip
Oh gosh pizza with mayonaise sounds super gross. Nope.
Also yay new oz video! I was rewatching the tumblr videos for days because your editing and delivery are just so funny.
May I introduce to you: peas and mayonnaise pizza
@@alexisbloodwood5587 you may not, yet you did anyway.
once I made a character, and 5 months later it was revealed to me that I had reinvented the Selkie mythological creature, same name and all
except she was also a transcoded programmer in a cat-ear hoodie
The thing about the National Park disappearances isn't just the rate of normal disappearances. It is how many are just, bizarre beyond normal explanations. Like people vanishing into thin air in ways that can't be accounted for in the typical ways. No drag marks from a predator getting them, no time for them to have wandered far, being found having traversed impossible terrain or impossible distances, etc. THOSE are not the results of just idiots in concentration, those are the result of some kind of (or multiple kinds of, most likely multiple kinds of) unknown and undocumented phenomena.