Resenting Sex with My Husband for 9 years
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- čas přidán 9. 10. 2023
- Show Notes:
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Thank you so much for tuning into this episode of How Married Are You?! See you next week!
When he said “An underrated characteristic of a husband is learning to protect your family from you” that hit deep!
It's so healing to hear that...should be on a t shirt 😊...
My mom passed recently...and I am grieving this holiday season...I will be leading with this statement...I am protecting you guys by passing on the holiday events.
CAP
Me, a single man wondering why YT is suggesting married content to me, but decide to give it a listen anyway. Let me tell you... I'm here to stay. Y'all funny and full of wisdom.
🎶🎶🎶 Goddd is trying to tell you something 🎶🎶🎶🎼🎼🎼🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶
Same here. ❤❤
Because you’re Nigerian and you should be married by now 😂😂 JKJK
Great stuff!!
SAME!
Yvette: “You take good care of me my love.” 😢 That was too beautiful. I love how you two appreciate each other loudly. ❤
I love that. " You don't have to understand what someone is going through." Just know and respect it's something and give the grace for that person to go through it.
Yes...
My mom passed and my niece started a big brawl against me because I wanted to skip out on some family time.
They didn't understand. But it's not their Mom....They didn't have to understand. 😔😮💨🥲
Issue still not resolved.
Yvette peacefully advocating for herself 👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿 girlllllll I'm here for it!
When Yvette said her period started, I already knew she was gonna get mad. Lol.. Question is why Glen won’t leave her alone to bleed in peace 😂
those hormones, sadly it doesn't get better the older you get and I a not married and I am child free but things can make me cry and I don't understand myself why I am crying.
All you gotta do is drink a gallon of water a day for two days straight and I swear it feels like your not even on your period.. I do it almost everytime sometimes I don’t drink water and it’s torture lol so I try to drink that gallon a day ❤
@@jtee231 lmao I’m glad that works for you but that’s not a universal experience especially if we talking about the emotions that come with period
@@Yoshiecatattck oh ok but you can’t knock what you never tried. And it actually does help with the hormonal function when you’re hydrated…but just a suggestion .. take it or leave it❤️
@@jtee231yea… that’s good it works for u, but I drink a gallon daily minimum as a lifestyle. Auntie Flo still comes thru like she was waiting on me.
And even with the husband not understanding, what about just respecting her wishes at the time?
Nice to see black couples being real. Just subscribed. This is magic 🎩 . Thank you.
Welcome to the Wedding Party! ♥
Yvette you are soft spoken and calm and just a beautiful woman, wife and mother. You’re adorable. Love you both. You’re sense of humor is beautiful too.
She's a school teacher so I can see why ❤
It’s a beautiful, balanced take on the issue.
1. The man MUST be cautious/sensitive to his wife/family… and protect the establishment from himself.
2. The wife IS HARBORING unforgiveness.
Healing happens with honesty
Let's get these likes up, y'all. Support this family for the work they do!
Facts I love them❤
As a pregnancy and postpartum Reiki Practitioner, helping women come back to their bodies after pregnancy is HARD! We unearth trauma from childhood and around sex and around our bodies. Sometimes, after several sessions, the woman shows up as a totally different person with different desires because she came back to herself better than before she even became married.
I’m so glad I came across this because this is what I’m going through. Loss my relationship and now I’m a single mom to a 2 year old.
@@BecomingErica life is generous. I pray you and your little one are well and healthy ❤️
These are the convos these toxic male podcasts can NEVER talk about or bring a woman on to talk about. These are the topics with speaking on.
This is so refreshing for me because I had a hard time with this as well. Our bodies feel as if they don’t belong to us after giving birth. I appreciate this❤
Reiki isn't a Christian practice btw. It's occultism
“It’s chocolate baby storyt-… hello?” 😂
As someone in a similar position. Its not just unforgiveness its also shattered trust. Trust in the most intimate way was violated by your most intimate and close person. Even when I try and forget the body doesnt forget.
this
"Hello!? "you just grooving like I'm sangin to you" 😂😂 Aww our good sis is tied! Sang the intro to her buddy! Lol
I think understanding is more important than Glen wants to acknowledge. Understanding creates empathy in many cases. Are we always going to understand everything? Of course not. You can have respect without understanding. But I also believe many people downplay the need for understanding as a defense mechanism.
Yes I told my mom the other day, to me understanding is the highest firm of love. IMO
Just adding a thought. I think his point was that this husband was using "not understanding" as an excuse not to respect and care for his wife. There's no way he could understand what she was going through, just as a white person could never understand what a black person in America feels. Unless you have actually been in someone's shoes/had similar circumstances and experiences as someone, I think truly understanding someone is rarer than we think. You can love, respect, and have empathy for someone without understanding what they're going through.
@@tfbowI don't believe understanding is all or nothing. If I've never been fired, I don't need to get fired to understand that it probably sucks. I may not understand how it feels to be down to your last dollar and but I can understand that feeling hopeless sucks. Empathy isn't as hard as people allow it to be. It just requires you to take a moment to drop your personal biases and be open to listen and embrace someone else's experience. I think people allow not being able to understand specifics to get in the way of at bare minimum understanding the concepts.
“Creating a safe space for me”. What a beautiful and profound compliment you gave to ur husband. Glen seems like an awesome incredible man. The two of you are just a refreshing beautiful and aware couple.
“In time we’ll get better at this” true mantra of marriage.
It’s a trauma response. That’s the reason for the years it’s been going on. Major therapy to undo or heal from sexual trauma no matter who it came from.
First time coming across you guys, this was really cute and actually very helpful for me in my relationship. The “you don’t have to understand” thing was actually a game changer for me because one of my deepest desires have been to feel “understood” and validated in my experience. But that unfortunately has led to many disagreements/arguments because sometimes, the other person literally just can not see your side because they have a different experience/outlook, and validating your experience can sometimes feel like invalidating their own. If they see a 6 and I see a 9, them telling me it’s a 9 just to make me feel better can hurt them in the process because they have to act like the 6 they see doesn’t exist. So that can often lead to unresolved stalemates which makes room to breed contempt. And contempt is never good. So with that being said, that tidbit in this episode made me realize that it really doesn’t matter much that what I feel/see is “understood” as long as I’m getting my needs met and my partner cares enough to facilitate that, and vice versa. Just as an example, coffee is good hot or cold. For whatever reason, I may think it should only be served hot. My partner may not understand that because their POV says either way its coffee and you’re getting caffeine, also it’s the summertime so why not take the opportunity to cool down, etc. But none of that matters, as long as whenever they go get me coffee they make sure its hot. They don’t have to see it my way. That just simplified a lot of internal conflicts I had. So, thank you guys for that.
Hold up: not the night owl complaining that HIS BABY is a night owl 🤣🤣🤣🤦🏾♀️ SIR!!!! 🤣🤣🤣
I really appreciate this podcast cause this new generation is giving up so easily on love and marriage they don’t understand we don’t always gotta agree but are we good with each other at the end of the day been watching for years since I was 16 I’m 21 now
"learning how to protect ur family from u", wowowowow u ate that
I agree about the therapy because i watched my parents' intimacy struggle as they navigated my brother's autism diagnosis/behaviors. My mom is my brother's caregiver. That in and of itself can affect the emotional and mental capacity of both parents. Couples Therapy is non negotiable (in my opinion) when a child(ren) has a disability it's ROUGH. I hope they come back from this. Thx for sharing & God Bless!
As a woman who is black and never had a two parent home , this is information i need to see so when and if my time for marriage comes i can love fully with the extra help from individual therapy
Mr. Henry - Has anybody ever told you that you look just like T-Pain?
Oooh, he does! Lol
There's a battle of the sexes that has spilled into many areas of life as it has intensified over time. It has reached a fever pitch level so much so that content like what you've created here has become necessary.
There are people living right now that are likely in need of the healing and the positive energy your content has provided here.
Respectful salute to you both!! And I'm sad to see the other channel go, but happy to continue watching the journey.
Blessings and peace to your family! 💯💪🏾❤️🙏🏾👏🏾👑
Referring to the letter, the husband sounds like he doesn't care or just doesn't view his wife outside of her "obligations". As an adult, you don't have to have a baby or that ability to have a baby to understand that pregnancy and giving birth takes a toll on a woman's body. If you can understand someone recovering from a devastating injury or something similar, you can understand recovering from giving birth. It's giving selfish. I think men forget to view women as a whole person not just as a wives and mothers.
I agree with most of your points but 7 yrs is a bit much. Now I would love to know the back story on this because who’s to say that this is true. We need both sides of this story.
@@desmondmcneil496It takes 2 years to fully recover from childbirth. Add how close together that people have kids...
I can see your point but I don’t really agree. This woman sounds like a hot mess. She failed to communicate how she was feeling and yet held a grudge against her husband for YEARS, for a decision for which she was partially responsible. Further, she has FIVE children, THREE of whom are autistic! That’s insane. This woman has a LOT going on and it sounds like she makes poor decisions (for example, to keep having children when she already is aware that she produces special needs-and therefore, extremely high maintenance and demanding-children), to have sex when she does not want to, and then to blame her husband for it. She sounds like a person who does not have the time or energy to take care of herself, she lacks personal insight, and she does not take responsibility for her own failure to set boundaries. I would blame the husband if he pressured her for sex after she explained how she was feeling, but it sounds like she remained silent but is still punishing him for not reading her mind.
@@psychattack3381 they produced special needs children. He participated. He didn't do anything to stop having children either. He also chose not to try to understand what she did say.
@@psychattack3381"sounds like she makes poor decisions" as if the man didn't also choose to have children with her aswell? You realize that genetics comes from both father AND mother right?
I really enjoy listening to HMAY❤
“Understanding is overrated” wow bro that blessed me. I needed to hear that.
Loving your vibe. You both just get it. Marriage is not easy, but if its good, it's so awesome to go through life not being alone. ❤. 35 yrs here. 🙏🕊✝️
I didn’t even know there was a separate podcast YT page! Love this and I liked the video AND subscribed… 😊
Love this podcast!! 1st time listener/Watching but u have a new subscriber!
idk why im just now subscribing to yall podcast. I've been subbed to "in fatherhood" for years. this is the content i needed. thank you
Dope conversation and a great blueprint for communication! I appreciate you!
Dropping gems!!!🙏🏽
Glad y’all are still doing these podcasts! I miss Yvette’s podcast 💜💚
New subscriber 🙋🏾♀️ love this podcast! Peace and blessings from Arizona!
Man thank y’all so much this is church for me right now!! Y’all are changing the way we think pod by pod!!!!
This video and interaction with you two is WHY we Love this podcast to the fullest!!! Both of you were in your bag!!! Thank you for being YOU!!!!
I believe understanding and empathy are important.
Compassion and selfishness are two terms that came to mind. Hope they are able to reconcile
First time tuning in... scroll passed randomly and thought to click...
New subbie❤❤😊🎉
Love this it's so necessary
I’ve never seen the CZcams of this. Only the podcast and had NO CLUE ya’ll sang the intro live. Wild!
New subscriber!!! Happy I found this channel 🥰
Oh wow!!! What a great segment, keep it coming.❤
First time watching, I enjoyed y’all so much!
This was a good conversation. I appreciate that part on understanding it was insightful. Glenn I appreciate how you are intentional with your words. It’s important to evaluate where you can look out for your partner in ways you are missing.
You two are so authentic 💗 stay bless 🙌
i’ve been watching y’all on tiktok for a while, i’ve since deleted it, i’m happy y’all popped up!!
You two exude friendship, healthy communication and respectful boundaries. This is "couples goals" my God contune to bless your union and to be a positive example for your ever growing Wedding Party ❤
y’all bring me soo much joy. Beautiful people that created a beautiful union and family. May God continue to bless you on your journey 💝🥂
Didn’t think I’d stay for this full video. First timer here. Thanks for a great session. I like y’all. Will be back.
I love yall. This the first video i watched of you 2 and want to promote this type of communication in a relationship. I've been trying to understand love since i was 14 and i know you both show a really genuine example. I see my woman and myself within you 2💚😎
Y'all are so grounded, very refreshing....
Unfortunately, the majority of men don’t realize how a woman’s whole hormonal make-up is completely changed by childbirth. Libido is completely obliterated, then add sheer exhaustion from carrying a human being for 9 months, and the labor & delivery process. In addition, you have to care for this new being constantly. Now add someone who wants sex from you. It’s inexplicable, they can’t comprehend the level of changes and exhaustion, and they need your attention too… This ended my relationship.
That is a Word sir! As a servant leader You have to protect your family from you!
Mrs. melanin I know you enjoy deep discussions and topics. Micheal Bethany had a great short video on “finding peace in hard times” I think everyone should hear.
Glen u are highly emotionally intelligent. You are a true leader in every sense of the meaning. I love the way you two communicate. It brings tears to my eyes bc I’ve never experienced parents like you two ever, including as a child with my own parents in my family of origin. It was traumatic coming from what I experienced. Being a childhood trauma survivor I’m still recovering from my neglect and abuse. I thank God for both of you. You are changing attitudes everywhere about so much for at least the people who are listening.
It’s so inspiring to see Yvette advocating for herself! I’m soft spoken as well and I loved seeing this example of speaking up for yourself while still keeping peace
@23:13 wow! Wonderful conversation. When a ‘safe space’ is created for a women (through honor and respect), she is willing (her body is wanting) to be awakened with your love. ❤ (circumstances consider, as mentioned…. )
agreed
This conversation is an example of what intimacy looks like in a romantic relationship. This type of intimacy was cultivated, they did the work and are doing the work. Thanks guys! You always inspire.
I love this channel. Yall had me zoned in ❤!
Thankyouu
11:00 - 11:12 this was so deep, being patient and waiting and trying to understand what level your spouse or family member is ready for, this is so nice of you to have rules for your children and letting them have an option as to what they desire in terms of the videos, just in general being respectful of their boundaries, that's the problem with many families on CZcams these days they make compromising and hurtful videos that other members of the family can't handle and it damages the relationship. I know I just met this channel but Yvette you truly found yourself an amazing husband.
1 minute in and I'm loving the chemistry!!!
Just subscribed. Thanx for reminding me!!!❤❤
Lol this was so funny yet authentic. Loved it!
You dont always have to understand things but it should always be respected!
love how compassionate y'all are as listeners to each other & to the subscriber who wrote the email - i went through that with my ex-husband and it took me years *after thebmarriage ended* to realize that it was a significant part of what wrecked my connection with him... and Glen's pieces about how men /husbands need to lead with self-restraint + respecting someone's boundaries even if you don't understand them are 100%
Checking in from the DMV.
The accountability you both take for yourselves is awesome too. Omg how I wish that more of the population was just like you two. Life would be so much better and more peaceful and loving. All praises to the Most High God in Jesus name. Ty Lord for this couple.
Oh my gosh!!!! I love you guys! I'm already subscribed, and I clicked the like 👍🏾 button before you even made mention. #Woke
I love these podcast episodes. The question or scenario was such a loaded topic and/or good share, and I totally agree with Glenn, although I wish he could have elaborated a little more on the answer for the writer rather than for the husband. #MoreFocusOnHerDelivery However, every bit of advice was similar to a two-edged sword, meaning beneficial for both. As with scripture, our pastor would say, “profitable” for the couple, and therapy will definitely help her with delivery and him with comprehension of the matter. You're both very right; sometimes it just needs to be said. #Acknowledged We can work on our understanding with the help of the Lord and each passing day. Guys, I thoroughly enjoyed this episode. The accumulation of "How married are you?" is such a concluding highlight. Thank you both for your transparency. Send my love to the kids, and I can't wait to catch the next one. 800 to 100; we've got to do something about those numbers. #Reminder #BingeWatch I'll be sure to share.
🙏🏾Blessings
BIG BIG L💞VE - TellItByB & 🌺InspirationByB, branches and affiliates of ⚜️HairByB
This was enlightening. Thank you!
This video confirmed my great decision to remain single 😂
I really enjoyed this episode! You guys are real.
Glen’s take on leadership got you guys a new subbie. I’m here for self-reflection and self-aware men. ❤❤❤❤❤
Man I love that little bit at the start! Chocolate baby story time ❤😊
Not understanding is an opportunity to show compassion in spite of not understanding thus loving your wife/husband.
Love listening to my folk... yall such family. One day when yall on the east. I gotta catch yall. #TEAMHMAY
Hi you guys! 👋🏽
As I started watching your podcast for the first time, I was wondering are they believers? And as soon as Glen began explaining the husbands underated role I know right away! 🥰 so I’ve officially joined the wedding party🎉😊
Great podcast, people! Keep this thing going. 👍🏾
I think being a husband is incredibly difficult. Being a wife is similarly difficult as well. I think from the man's perspective, you have to be prepared to serve without any conditions.
To respond to the letter, that brother is in a difficult situation. You cannot pressure your wife to give you sex (I wouldn't even want it that way), so if she's not ready, you really just have to wait that out. Communication is really important here, and it can't start after the baby comes. Sex in marriage is important to most men. It becomes very easy to find your self in a place if resentment when you don't understand why sex isn't happening. It's really important to have some outlet to discuss this with someone (preferably the wife).
Honestly you're right! I wasnt thinking about liking this video (even though I love this video) until you mentioned it. I just mentally like videos I guess🤷🏾♀️
Aw yall are good to each other! Yah not asking what he wants if you’re picking up food is hard to let go 😅 or if one eats the other’s leftovers!
The like button legit lit up when they asked us to like yall so no excuses!!!!
12:22 big ups to you for knowing that having rules is a practical practice that gets the job done. I would assume that children sometimes dip more into the “my feelings are my world” world, but we adults have the capacity to know: the world and my feelings are separate and influence interdependently… if that makes sense
New subscriber🙌🏽 sending ❤ from 🇬🇧
It’s an honor being a man, but the responsibility of being a good man is so hard! Having to provide, love, protect, and be considerate towards your woman is a task that can break many strong men if we don’t step away and find someone we can talk with. Such as an elder woman or man that we respect to give us that knowledge and insight on moving forward in a healthier way together.
I pray that you always find counsel from the wise ! Just wanting to ALIGN with being “ A GOOD MAN” for your family makes you a GOOD MAN!
@@jainowwooden4088 ♥️
Hope you find it my g
Ok for the intro try to rest a beat in 13 years.
Beleaf: this is beleaf
Yvette: and I'm Yvette!
Beleaf: Married thirt-TEEN (hold half a beat) ..years
🎉BOOM🎉
You guys don't know how many morning commutes I've spent rehashing this new layout😂. make a contest for people to supply ideas maybe?!
Haha, Ive been wanting them to do the intro like this too!
What a conversation!
Thankyouu
I love y’all so much!!😊❤
Yvette I absolutely love your sweater. But I always love all your outfits you always look so cute.
10:25 - Bro, that’s LOVE❤Godspeed 🙌🏾✨👑
I’m sitting eating while listening to y’all go back and forth I’m just like 👀👀. That’s my eyes going from person to person while eating!
LOL!!!
I loved this ! 🖤🖤🖤❤❤❤
Y'all not hitting the like button on this excellent content?
Hey Yvette! I hear you girl!! Sometime it be like that! 🤎🤎🤎🤎😘
Thankyouu
Love you guys!
First time watching but listening to your husband’s idea that all children’s “sleep clock” is the same is not true. Out of six of my children, 3 of my children are “night owls”. We did our best to put them all to bed at the same time but making them fall asleep at the same time was impossible.
Yes.I needed the like the video reminder
This was amazing. Before even commenting on the content I want to say I love how in tune you two are with each other. That is what will keep me tuned in. I learned a lot just by watching your chemistry alone. The delicate way y'all dialogue is refreshing. Keep considering each other. It's a beautiful thing. May the creator continue to bless your union and your little ones as you are continually blessing his children.. thats us .. lol... #OneLove💚💫