Matteo Lane - Homophobic Audience
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- čas přidán 16. 11. 2022
- November 20th we release my brand new special here on CZcams!
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Shot & Edited By Chris Caso:
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#MatteoLane #comedyspecial #standupcomedian #standupcomedy #special #comedyshorts #comedy_video #comedynyc #newyork #newyorkcity #nyc #nyctour #comedy #standupcomedian #comedian - Komedie
I gotta say, no matter how many times I hear your impression of a drunk white girl in the distance yelling “French Fries??” I cannot contain my laughter, you are such a talented comedian!
for anyone wondering, it’s at 3:07
I love him! I'm like, if we can crossbreed him with Sandi Toskvig somehow, the result will be one of the most intelligent, hilarious bisexual comedians to ever exist for all time
The way he slings the microphone is the best part
@@Spliffted I like to think it also had practical use, making sound like the "french fries?!" Is Cong closer as he swings it. Hilarious!! 🤣
i just died
I love how when people use the “stereotype gay voice”, it’s usually very contrasting. But when Matteo does it, it’s only slightly higher than his actual voice 😭😭😭
@notfiveo What the fuck? Do you just assume that feminine gays are attempting to imitate women? That’s just how they act and there is nothing wrong with it. And some extra information, both you and your friend are homophobic. If someone being explicitly and outwardly gay makes you uncomfortable, you are homophobic.
@notfiveo It's arguably misogynist isn't it? Like I'm a bit fruity but I just think of it as being my possible Intersex self rather than these types, who enjoy labelling it as 'feminine' behaviour in the name of feminism, then totally failing to see the irony.
I've seen a few even treat being emotionally unstable, with no critical thinking skills, and manipulative, obsessing over designer labels and blah blah as though that's the ideal feminine aesthetic and anyone who disagrees is the real misogynist. Ummm, didn't we all spend 100s of years fighting this misogynist stereotype? Bizarre.
@@TheHorseshoePartyUK what is it that you think they are going to do to you... for a full hour? Just gonna talk about the foot network! I'm cisfemale and have an abnormally quiet voice and an accent. And the looks I get from the loud Karens who ask me to "speak up and say it American"." Just listen to the message of what people say. not how they say things.
@@GiselleKlara You're ironically tone policing me in the name of anti-tone policing
@@GiselleKlara Futhermore, the word cisgender is complete pseudo-Science made up to appease the PPL with a PP mob. The only words necessary there are:
Man, Transman, Intersex, Woman and Transwoman.
That bit about the guy going "NOPE" and leaving is so goofy. In that dude's mind, he probably thought he was being a brave man with rock-solid conviction, taking a stand against the eeeeevil gay comedian. It's like, dude, you already paid for your ticket.
Who knows why people leave shows. Sometimes they're not angry, just embarassed and awkward.
I respect those guys more than hecklers to be fair. They might be trash people, but they're trash people of conviction.
@@tafua_a Agreed. If you're against a comedian for whatever reason (whether it's bigotry like homophobia/racism/sexism or just not being a fan of what they're saying), I respect you more for just leaving rather than staying and deciding to heckle the comedian
Right, who did he think he was coming to see😅
@@lizhowerton895Joe Rogan probably lol
he said "no straight man wants a castle" and im like "wait i love castles"
then i remembered that i am also gay
I just wish Matteo was actually funny.
@@ems4884why are you watching or replying to this video at all if you don’t like his content? Just… move on?
One of the MANY things I love about Matteo's standup is that he understands how to use the microphone effectively. I never have to yank the ear bud out of my ear because he's suddenly too loud. I really appreciate it.
Of course he is! It´s a mic... look at it! lol
That’s his inner theater kid. Clearly well-versed in how NOT to abuse the power
@Kristi Vaughn I love this. I was not a theater kid so a microphone is so uncomfortable for me to use. But that viewpoint explains so much.
@@nickekotevski9277 you’re disgusting.
@@dewilew2137I was so confused by that comment, but then seeing YOUR comment made it all click into place.
It's even funnier now that I can see how the jokes are connected. Yes, I have watched the shorts, um, several times... lol
Me too! I was also thinking while watching like "Ooooh so thats how the whole bit went together!"
yes same!!!
Yup 😂
Where have you watched them?
@@Oeternoarquiduque the CZcams shorts feed, sub feed if you're subbed, or also on his channel
Wow. very rare you find a comedian whos entire act literally just sounds like your best friend telling you crazy stories about their day so casually that you dont even realize its a routine. Bravo
Indeed, this felt very fresh :D
It sounds like the little brother who isn't really a friend, but you have to bring him along and starts making shit up to sound cool.
why was "He is *not* Patty" so damn funny lmao
Timing haha. Guy knows what he’s doing 😎😂
Fun fact: back in the day, castles were covered over in plaster to protect the stonework. And the plaster would often be painted for decoration. And because all 'red' shades were considered 'manly' back then, many a castle would be painted in a soft pink colour. This is 100% true and any medieval historian worth a damn will confirm this for you.
There's a castle not far from where I used to live called Castell Coch (Welsh for Red Castle) known for it's reddish hue. However, it was built in 1875
This is by far the most under-appreciated comment here! I had no idea about the castles though I was aware pink was 'manly' back in the day before the social construct changed for whatever reason.
Totally illogical to assign genders to colours and our enemies think they're the unquestionably logical ones 😂😂😂😂
Well not all could afford red paints.
Exterior paint would need significant upkeep for that era and doesn’t really work for 40ft walls and scaffolding/ropes. It was hard enough to get roof tiles and chimneys or poop towers. The exterior would only be highlighted like that in rare ownership cases. Your argument is correct in cases like barns, where red paint was more affordable and necessary for the function of the property/resale value.
Red paint and pink paint was used indoors and considered highly masculine for the purpose you specified. Along with the association to cochineal and foreign trade markets and wealth.
Elite people could get a landscape artist to paint their house in whatever color they told them to, even telling an artist to alter the structure and make it stand out from nature etc.
usually the plaster color would be different shades (white/grey-yellow) depending on content/mixing.
Most actually liked featuring some stonework as it was a way of importing luxury goods/materials from foreign areas em mass. Brickwork however was usually plastered over. With most going for an inexpensive exterior and an expensive interior.
Most would renovate their interiors tho as a way of utilizing their monetary assists, showing off at house-parties, and negotiating trade or business deals at certain locations. (Victorian era interior design and castles are a very different breed then historical castles of earlier eras and in other locations then just England)
A good color to note is the interior white for working quarters in castles (early uses of sanitation and methods of ‘cleanliness’ in what was chemical-paints spread to kill insects. And to track dirt.) it was far more common to see across multiple areas.
@ReliableExcavationDemolitions Mann Both work.
@@TheHorseshoePartyUK Cis and straight people don't really think about it. It's just superficial cosmetics. Only gay and trans people care about it.
He needs to have his own TV show he's so good.
He soon will!
I hope he does soon soo funny
I’m cheering for Matteo to hit that 1 million subscribers ❤❤❤
Factss
Netflix special needed asap
The random audience member that whispered "secrets" after he said secrets has me rolling 🤣
The delivery and timing is so good! A really tight act. He’s even got the distance of the mic down to a science. I appreciate how insanely polished this is, it’s NOT easy.
“NO!”
“French fries???”
“But it’s her BIRTHDAY!”
“Get out get out get out get out!”
“And don’t forget your scarf!”
“It’s cashmere!”
For me the best part is "We are having FUN!" 😠
"She looks like she's had a lot" my new favorite line for those birthday week/month people
Yeah, we watched the clip.
for me the best is "CLOSE THE DOORS"
@@nerouo"ANAL!"
It’s wild seeing this full 5 minute clip when a bunch of 20-30 sec clips from this set have gone insanely viral on social media. Seeing the full context is pretty surreal and is a testament to how zipper tight (and potentially ADHD lmao) Matteo’s material is. Very pumped for the Seattle shows!
I just love watching or talking to people who have adhd or adhd like communication, my brain can’t follow slower content lol.
In the early stages of a relationship, a tight zipper could be important while pumping.
@@jcam5064 Relate. Also I was just looking for a comment to dump one of my takes in. Matteo is free to take it and run with it, I won't be making my own content anytime soon if ever.
"Homophobes think about what men get up to in bed, even more than Freddie Mercury ever did. Change my mind"
😊
3:26 3:28
“Birthday Week” 🙄😂
We all know someone who has this thing. He nailed it.
I know a birthday monther. It’s a lot.
Trina Vega
LOVE how he sneaks jokes in between jokes. Gimme a sec to process the last one, I need to catch my breath 😂
When is Matteo finally getting a Netflix special? This is ridiculous 😭
November 20. The Advice Special
@@amygallant6700 wait for real?
Yes.
Not on Netflix and not November 20th, its on youtube and on November 22th
@@vanai2359 thank you for clarifying. I’ve been so sick my sight has been blurry
My husband and I yell 'FRENCH FRIES' at each other all the time because of this bit. Amazing
the french fries thing was so on point and the mic execution was flawless too
I LOVE Matteo! I had 2 older brothers, both gay, (I'm the little sister, not gay but can you imagine what my parents would have thought if I were?!)
When he talks about his brother being gay and how his parents handled it, I can relate so much! My dad, who like Matteos dad was also in Viet Nam, sounds so much like my dad. He loved us all unconditionally and tho he worried about the safety of his two gay sons he never once made them feel anything but loved and accepted. I wish my brothers had lived long enough to see Matteo. They would have been so happy!
First off, I'm so sorry for the loss of your brothers. I *wish* one of my 3 brothers were gay, in all seriousness. I've always been fascinated by multiple gay children. When I was a kid, I saw a documentary on 6 brothers & sisters who were all gay and that changed my perspective on a lot. Do you mind if I ask what year your brothers had come out to your parents, and how they *initially* handled it? Especially your Vietnam vet dad?
2:01 this man’s voice is POWERFUL enough to retain the same audio while pulling the microphone away from him
dude should be a voice actor!! his vocal range is really good
@@SUPERLINKX2 he used to be an opera singer, makes sense
Not ….really
@@XinyueLim. thank you! Makes sense.😉
That part was so insanely funny to me
Don Matteo is a master of the flip back and forth, this, that and pow! Also he is super skilled at the use of the microphone, using sound to put different characters in their snap shot takes by putting the mic further away, in that blinding split second you see/hear the guy saying "nope", and the woman yelling "french fries!?" When we used to watch gay comedy in the belly room at the Comedy Store in the 90s, there were some awesome not-well-known comics, and we had a lot of laughs, thigh-slapping laughs. But there was a promise, a prophecy foretold of a comic who had the wit of Paul Lynde, the depth of Charles Nelson Reilly and the ability to tell a story like Richard Pryor or he who must not be named (Cosby)...all rolled into a bright and shiny package like a Christmas morning present. Cue "Ladies and Gentleman...Matteo Lane!"
……NOPE!
The way he yells “french fries” randomly pops into my head all the time 😂
This was so sweet, and accurate which makes it even better.
He's awesome
"Don Matteo" is a show about a priest solving crimes tho
very funny and clever, and as a straight guy i totally agree with your views on camouflage clothes and birthdays. i like to sing "camo, camo, man..." (to the melody of macho man) when they're around. i once said to a guy in camo at a grocery store, 'whoops, i didn't see you there with your camo on." he just stared at me while his wife just bust out laughing.
The way he said "French Fries?!" had me pissing myself
Matteo is the type of comedian who is hilarious to every type of audience. His delivery is very personal, and conversational. He's everybody's best friend, telling funny stories.
I just want to follow him for a week where ever he goes
Yes!
SAAAAAAME UGH
This is either really sweet, or really really creepy 😂
I dont
That is what we call stalking, Benjamin
I’m a straight man and I laughed myself senseless. This dude is a gem.
Why did you need to point out that you’re straight?
@@beano_burrito for the same reason people often point-out that they're not...?
i'm a straight man..........hah. the lady doth protest too much
“And don’t forget your scarf!” Iconic 😂😂😂
“And don’t forget your scarf!” took me out 💀
But it was cashmere!
The snapping! 😂
I lost it at "FRENCH FRIES?!" hahahahahaha
This man is a genius and national treasure. Protect him at all costs.
I love that he celebrates every gay stereotype that I have about gays lol. It makes me feel less guilty of believing that stereotypes are sometimes true to a certain extent
I can watch that "NOPE!" over and over again it was great
i so wish he'd asked the guy "Sir, it's totally fine if you want to go- but....what is it that you think i'm going to do???".....cause I really want to know too.....like demo of ....or volunteer only......or make a line....like what was in his head?
''It was her 'Birthday week.' ...One of those.'' Made me burst 🤣🤣
“and don’t forget your scarf!”😂😂😂😂
“Moats, wizards, secrets” 😂
As someone who used to live near Springfield Massachusetts I can tell you that everything that Matteo is saying is 110% correct.
Gay
As another resident, I'd have to agree lol
So, the venue was ROAR! ? Did my sleuthing work? 😁
Oh yes. Including the clouds. He apparently hasn't been to Taunton or Bridgewater yet: and please don't go.
@@GiselleKlara Don't forget Lawrence 🤢
Matteo is the ultimate evening talk show host.He's funny, kind, quick-witted, and genuine.He has that elusive Johnny Carson"esque" vibe.
this gentleman needs a couple of NETFLIX specials....he's the best
I've never heard of this guy, but I'm really glad I clicked on this. Legit made me laugh out loud at "French fries???"
As a gay myself, you're probs the first person/comedian i can hear say f****t without recoiling and exiting the convo/video at the speed of sound. Honestly an achievement 👏 🙌 👌
Us gays are reclaiming the word
@@K_B48 Hell Yeah!
Oh yes I suspect you're American? In Britain things are just better. The British LGBTI tend to be emotionally resilient, rock hard, often intense party animals who simply laugh off such terms from those hate us, dismantle their egos with scathing putdowns if they even remotely catch our attention, and the things we say to *each other* Americans would get us cancelled for. I've got a Mexican-American friend who is a lovely hilarious man, he says all sorts to me, and the nicest thing I call him is Aztec Jeeves.
@@TheHorseshoePartyUK gay ppl in america call each other f@ggots too its ok
You wouldn't like being in australia then. F*g is slang for ciggerate and f*ggot is also a slang for that. Though our humour and attitude of, "we don't care what offends you because there's bigger shit to cry over" you probably won't like either.
I'm so excited for your special, Matteo. Everything you post is amazing!
“No straight guy is like ‘I want a tower.’”
😂😂😂
That fuckin' "Nope!" kills me every time I see this
"and he was not Patty..." - Awesome
As an archaeologist and medievalist I must say: Castles can be anything they want!
Show me a castle that screams toxic masculinity louder than the ruins of Rochester Castle in UK.
Googled and approved. It’s so boxxy and looming.
I never thought a castle could be this straight till I saw it
nah googled it, that castle is DEEP in the closet
@@yamanesque8596 hmm, I don't know... it's a shell of its former self, takes zero effort to look decent and just stares at you with empty eyes. Doesn't seem closety to me.
If you want to see a castle deep in the closet, visit Malburk Castle in Poland. It used to be one of the centers of the Teutonic Knights, which means it tried to look all boring and orderly, acts overly aggressive and would only let guys in.
Hmm.. maybe I should write kind of a rainbow castle guide for Europe?
"Nope"....makes me giggle way too much! Pretty much what I wanted to say every time I was forced into church. Love you!
I love this guy!!! His energy, expressions, he’s funny without even trying. Can’t wait to watch more. ❤
The "I'm the fun and funny friend who's telling stories" type of comedy is one of my fav. Deadpan humor too.
Nothing is worse than forgetting a beautiful garment 😂
Or your 3000 dollar handbag with your cell phone in it.
Especially if it's cashmere
“ᶠʳᵉⁿᶜʰ ᶠʳⁱᵉˢ” SENT ME TO THE MOON
AAAAAh haha "don't forget your scarf!" dang, that is quality fun!
I want more of these!! I really hope you could have your own Netflix special. This is so funny!
This guy is my new favorite comedian. He is so funny. It’s mind blowing how amazing he is up there, I hope you get everything you ask out of the universe.
@3:44 A lot of drinks, or a lot of birthdays? XD
These are 5 minutes feeling like an entire show, but in the best possible way. I laughed so hard the entire time! Instant subbed and now I'm gonna no-life your entire material! Thank you!
Matteo is such a fantastic comic.
Also, when I heard him say “have you ever heard of Springfield, Massachusetts?” That was like a gut punch as Massachusetts kid but he’s also right because Jesus Springfield is terrible lol
Speaking as a Springfield local Springfield is not the most welcoming place, to be honest Massachusetts isn’t as progressive or welcoming as people perceive. especially for most people lol. But I know at least when Tom segura came by he killed it.
They are called Massholes for a reason. It's all terrible; rich terrible or poor terrible but just terrible and if you live there you lose the ability to think about anything but the Red Sox. It's a love it or hate it place. If you are from there, or go to college in Boston, you love it. If you moved there later, you tend to just not get or like the culture- just one person's take- OR you really lean in hard. It's just a very specific part of the country.
hey!!! some of us like the patriots
We went to a great Italian restaurant in Springfield. Forget the name but it was literally the only place in town where anyone was and it was packed
@@francismackin4681red rose?
I love Mateo he always cheers me up when I’m having a hard or bad day…
Incredible delivery and timing. Great stuff!
i have never seen your material ever, i will say that i havent laughed that hard in a while. i look forward to more of your work. Keep it up!
The fucking "FRENCH FRIES?" bit took me out 😭😭😭
3:05 that worked so well
eh?
His deliveries are just perfect, he's mastering his timing
MATTEO!!!! I need like 8 Netflix specials from you!! I have been watching everything I can find from you for a couple of years, & I can’t get enough!
It was a bad idea to watch this while drinking tea, i almost choked and spilled everything from laughing lmao
Some comedians are talented joke writers, others have incredible delivery and timing. This guy could make me laugh reading the phone book.
0:57 That is the most Springfield thing I have ever heard I'm sorry 😭
Absolutely lmao
I disagree
Dude I live in Kansas...and know A LOT of people like the ones you just called out! This made me laugh so hard...and I agree, they need to have their own show!
I've been rolling on my floor for 3min straight. This dude creates joy.
You're my new favorite stand up comedian💜😂
I’ve shared this video with all my family!!!! I looove it!!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
My friend just sent me this video this morning, what a thing to wake up to! First day back at work, weather is miserable (it's Scotland) yet I'm proper belly laughing! Brilliant way to start the day!
Going to consume more of your stuff!! You're hilarious!
the Patty cinematic universe between Mateos standup and sibling rivalry
You’re killing it my man
Just stumbled upon this. Love it! Good material, perfect comedic timing!
Matteo you are so gosh damn hilarious 😂😂😭😭😭 I would love to see you live. You and Nicole Byer should tour together, y'all would DESTROY
I can listen to Matteo all day! Even the same jokes are hilarious!!
I LOVE this guy! I need more of his comedy!
The connection the comedian had with the audience for 5 minutes straight (hehe) was amazing!
Love his comedy and outlook and everything so much. Someone give him an hour show dammit! Looking forward to his new "audience" special.
2:20 im fucking crying
This is one of the best sets I've ever seen. Genuinely hilarious and better than 99% of what other professional comedians are doing right now.
Saw him in DC before the pandemic. He was great, and the comic that opened for him was great, too
Gotta love Matteo. The energy, the feel good mood, the oldschool gayness - hope to see u in Germany in 2023!! ♥️💪🏼👍🏼
Holy shit dude, your delivery is perfect!
Keep doing everything you are doing
the springfield namedrop caught me offguard LMAO your description sounds about right
yesss more longer clips instead of just shorts please! your international audience demands it
OMG the Springfield MA material!! I work there, and that is 100% accurate. NO ONE knows how to drive, it's a nightmare.
Im soooooo happy I stumbled into Matteo!! This is my first of many videos, so so funny!
This was hilarious😂 love finding new comedians to look for
I shouldn’t have watched this when benchpressing. Bar almost fell on my face.
The craft and pacing here is unreal. Stellar.
Moats, wizards, ✨𝓼𝓮𝓬𝓻𝓮𝓽𝓼✨
That french fry bit had me in stitches
I have never been more proud to live in Vancouver.
Matteo is one of the funniest in the world right now if you ask me!
😂😂😂 I laughed so hard during pretty much the entire video. Love you!
😡 "We're having fun."
😂😂😂😂😂😂❤❤❤❤😂😂
I already know I'm going to have this on repeat. Hilarious once again!!!
I'm so glad you're posting longer form!!! Thanks so much man, also, greeting from Cleveland of the North.