Life After Abuse // Season 2 Episode 6 | Honest Tea Talk
Vložit
- čas přidán 27. 07. 2024
- **TRIGGER WARNING: SEXUAL ABUSE**
In this episode, we discuss life after abuse with childhood sexual abuse survivor, Mayameen Meftahi of She Can Consultancy.
shecanconsultancy.com
WANT SEASON 3?
We can only do that with your help! Donate via:
- GoFundMe: www.gofundme.com/honestteatalk
- PayPal: bit.ly/HTTdonate
JOIN THE DISCUSSION:
- Facebook: / honestteatalk
- Instagram: / honestteatalk
- Twitter: / honestteatalk
GET UPDATES:
Sign up at bit.ly/honestteatalk
___
About Honest Tea Talk
with Aliyah, LaYinka & Sumayah
Inspired by Jada Pinkett-Smith's 'Red Table Talk', 3 Muslim women have set up a platform to speak openly and honestly, giving viewers an unedited insight into the minds and life of Muslim women. Honest Tea Talk brings deep and often unspoken topics to the table to lay down our masks and start much-needed discussions about matters related to Muslim women and the ummah at large.
© 2020
#honestteatalk #realtalk #abuse
You’d expect a woman who has gone through a traumatic childhood to be afraid to express herself and to be terribly sad because the pain is unimaginable. But to see her so bright, humorous and so comfortable talking about her feelings is amazing and is truly inspiring. Subhanallah human beings have such strong resilience!
I’m at this exact point, jaded constantly crying in between wishing to die and hoping for a better life
@@idi.h5460 may Allah guide you and bless you. Stay strong sis
This Episode is indeed a DEEP one.
. "...Do not mock a pain you haven't gone through"
Assalam alaikm wa rahmatullah wa barkatuhu Dearest Sisters! 🌷🌷❤️.
Had Allah lifted the veil for his slave and shown him how He handles his affairs for him, and how Allah is more keen for the benefit of the slave than his own self, his heart would have melted out of the love for Allah and would have been torn to pieces out of thankfulness to Allah. Therefore if the pains of this world tire you, do not grieve. For it may be that Allah wishes to hear your voice by way of Dua’a. So pour out your desires in prostration and forget about it and know; that verily Allah does not forget it.
Ibn Al Qayyim
May Allah be pleased with him
Hawa Osman so true my dear sister
@@nasri9911 so beautiful
Allah is greatest and the only thing I have & need. Alhamdulilah
Mayameen you are inspiring and such an incredible human being. May Allah reward you for your strength, motivation and honesty. Ameen ya rab. Sending you love.
Please do a video on how to teach children about abuse. To be able to recognise it, approach trusted person with it. Many fall long term victim believing they cant turn to no one or confused what is happening.
I 100% agree
SubhanAllah 😢😢 What an inspirational story. Thank you sister Mayameen for sharing. Alot of stories are left unspoken... but after watching this, i believe it's a sign for me to speak out about my previous DV relationship.. I'm a survivor too Alhamdulillah ✌
Mind sharing your story sis
As a survivor, I can relate to so many things Mayameen shared. I never actually told anyone myself but told my siblings and later on in life, they told my parents. The pain of having been sexually abused is very intense. The pain of how it impacts your life is also intense. It doesn't matter how old a survivor gets... the impact of sexual abuse still resonates from time to time in his/her life. May Allah Subhanuhu wa'ta'ala bless and strengthen all who have been through or are still going through issues arising from this awful trauma, ameen
I have a genuine question if I May Ask: When the Time comes where it is more difficult than the other days, you remember and you're hurt. How do you keep a good opinion of Allah ?
@@CalieNina I don't know how to put this across but, I never EVER have a bad opinion of Allah, never. But, to answer your question in the way I think you want to really know... My Emann takes a nose dive and I find it very hard to pray. There are times when I'm in Sujood and I'm crying my eyes out I just don't get up out of sujood, I can't finish the prayer but I believe Allah hears it all. He knows before I go to pray that I'm going to weep. So... No, I never blame Him. But I AM very hard on myself for being imperfect when in fact I should probably just embrace the weeping (i.e. just let it happen) and allow the pain to ease that way... I hope this answers your question xxx
Bless you
Allahumma ameen!
Ameen.
Sister I love you for the sake of Allahsw!!! I am shocked right now to watch you here I cant believe it!! I am revert of 10years welcome to the deen of Islam may you always be protected and loved by those Allahswt puts in your life, may Allahswt mercy and love shower on you and your family Ameen, I watched your documentary sister about your father on TV a while ago, I cried at all the womens stories and made dua for you all and now you are here I cant believe it!! Its a true sign to increase my faith and pray it increases yours and others Ameen! Honest Tea Talk has helped me so much and I really pray Allahswt rewards all of you and blesses your lives and grants you all Jannah al furdous and your families! You will hold a special place in my heart sister and I will keep you in my duas insha Allah you are so brave and I am so proud of you may Allahswt reward you xxxxx
What's the name of the documentary?
Subhan-Allah! May Allah grant us the wisdom to hold our tongues when we see others slipping! Ameen. May He forgive us for the thoughts that we ran with when we internally judged Ameen! 😔
Conversation that had to be had. Well done ladies!! May Allah reward you for your efforts, Ameeen
Allahumma ameen
What kind of parent sexually abuses their child? I know this happens but it literally makes my stomach turn when I hear this...and the sad thing is I hear it way too often. Friends of mine who were abused. Kids in my school (I work as a teacher), people in my family, it makes me want to cry how common this is.
Dhynasah Çakir I completely agree! My heart sinks every time I hear about it and I feel like it’s only common because either no one wants to talk about it and/or turn in the perpetrator because they know them or want to handle it themselves which I believe is completely disrespectful to the victim and to the future victims of that person.
@@mulkiabdi3081 yeah. Exactly. Sadly victims are groomed to keep it a secret and people care more about family shame than the safety of their children. That's why I think its soo soo important to teach our kids what is the difference between good and bad touch and what their private areas are. And even then explain to them that they should tell us if something happens.
KAIZO POLYMATH I understand that it is a test for them but the trauma inflicted on the victim is not only physical but psychological. Unfortunately, I have had many people confide in me about their abuse. The first time I had a friend tell me was when we were 11 years old and I didn’t understand it then but I realized that she was suffering because her family didn’t want to turn in the abuser because he was family. I only ask because I refuse to accept these weak answers. We need to do more for our people. May Allah protect us all. Ameen.
However I am glad that this has come to light in recent years and such topics are no longer taboo. Because only with these knowledge, I know how I should protect my future kids because it erases my naivety.
These cases happens a lot if not even more in the past but it was not brought to light and never brought to attention as much as it does now. You'd be shocked that some scenarios kids are the perpetrators of inappropriate sexual advances, so who do you put the blame on then?
Its a complicated issue. I personally hate sexual predators, especially adults because their brain have well developed and they know fully well the weight of their actions. But society need to change as well. Like what the hell, releasing such high profile criminal and telling the victims to deal with it is such a ridiculous excuse.
The strength of a woman❤️. Jazzakillah kheyr sisters May Allah bless you in both worlds❤️
*If you're reading this, Allah knows, Allah hears you, Allah understand you. Allah will surely recompense Alhamdulilah* 💜
The man only got ten years then didn’t even have to serve that?! SubhanAllah! I don’t understand the justice system.
Thought hed get life or executed
Never judge anyone is a lesson I've learned..
I can feel the pain of this sister..
I love this episode..
But unfortunately a lot of muslims are first to judge fellow sisters and brothers
@@sleepynidzyy
Very true indeed..
As muslims we should be helping each other rise but sadly we just judge and we so divided that we are causing our own distraction..
We need to unite n have a heart that accepts differences.. it's a painful state we are in..
@@user-qe1mk6xk1z have you faced abuse?
Do not mock a pain you haven’t gone through. So powerful 🤲🏻
I am a 16 year old muslim girl and I aspire to be like you guys, you are so open minded and have chosen your deen,
I'm ugly crying sister. You honestly never know someone's story. May Allah take the point you emaciated yourself and those women from shame and remove your mistakes by means of it. Ameen. I so feel you, lady. Stay strong.
May Allah bless you too, know all of Allah's creations are beautiful as it comes in a hadith of a man who felt ugly. May Allah keep us strong balanced and focused on akhirah!
Ma shaa Allah, what an incredibly strong sister 💕 may Allah subhanahu wa Ta‘ala always protect you and your family and bless you ❤️
Allahumma ameen
ASalam Alikum sister, I know this is a bit off topic, but that guy imran nazir hosain is a big liar. hes a sufi extremist who supports the 79 cia iran revolt to help israelis fight iraq who lost the sinai to Sunnis. he lies alot on"eschatology" when he isn't even honest on history. he said the whole Quran hasn't been fully explained, like did he read Quran 5,3 or 16,44. i think he said that to lie, please be aware of him!
Mayameen May Allah continue to give you strength to move on from the pain of abuse. May Allah always protect you and your family and all the muslims from painful experiences Allahuma ameen
It's so upsetting to know these abusers get such light sentences.... I am also a survivor but unfortunately there is no evidence to convict him even though he did the same thing to my own mother as a child & other little girls. I pray everyone hurt by this can heal. We will not forget it but at least I hope we can all have some peace in our lives. Such a brave woman for sharing her story & helping other survivors. It is so difficult to be open about this topic but it needs to be taken out of the shadows.
Wow don’t ever put yourself Down, iv been through similar situations and it’s hell at the time, you’ve was chosen by Allah as all reverts have , amazing strong woman ❤️❤️🙏
ماشاء الله، بارك الله فيكي
Sister Maymeem, May Allah reward you immensely in this life and Thereafter.
Incredible story JazakAllah khairan for sharing. May Allah continue increase you in health and blessings
Jazakumullahu khayran we appreciate you guys we appreciate your time your effort i can't thank you enough
May Allah reward you may Allah grant you janatul fardaws
SubhanAllaah. This is one of the most important Tea Talks you ladies have done. Sister Mayameen, may Allaah continue to use you as a source of comfort and solace in our Ummaah. You are truly an amazing sister. May Allaah grant the Ummah healing and the strength to stay on the path with faith in Him. Aameen. 💕
May Allah reward you for sharing sister mayameen, may Allah bless the other sisters for this video.
Very deep and brave talk today. Mayameen's openness is something I wouldn't personally have the guts to do, and it's so lovely alhamdulilah to see her pull through her turmoil and tests. May Allah give us and her more strength.
One thing that doesn't sit right with me though is what was said at the end, something along the lines of allowing fluctuations in our faith. I understand where she's coming from, but perhaps that turn of phrase can be interpreted in many ways, so apologies if I've got the wrong end of the stick but I don't agree with what was said.
Firstly, for us outsiders, I agree that we should ask others the 'why ' question rather than judge and lecture, and help people through their problems. However, we cannot put aside the hadeeth of 'reminders benefits the believer'. I feel that we have become a community against reminders, that we jump to our own defense, saying 'don't judge.' Find out the story before jumping to any conclusion, subhannallah many people suffer in silence, but then we must accept good advice, Allah's put that person in front of us, giving advice for a reason.
Another point about this issue, is that alhamdulilah sister Mayameen managed to get to the other side, despite having trouble with her faith. But in the moment of tests, I don't think it's right to say that it's okay for us leave practises of the faith. In a previous Honest Tea Talk, I think it was Layinka or Sumayyah who mentioned a very good point, they said that when highs and lows in our faith occur, try to have a base that you won't pass, such as I will never stop prayer, even if I stop reading the quran frequently, or stop my sunnah prayers - the 5 obligatory prayers will never be stopped, that way we're in the realm of safety, because who knows when our lives will be taken away. Likewise with many other things. you may go through a phrase of not wanting to wear hijab, the fact that you're keeping it on for the sake of Allah when all you actually want to do is take it off, is an act of worship. Subhannallah. Allah sees our day to day striving and it doesn't go unnoticed. What I mean to say is, don't open a door to shaytan willingly, as that door may never close or worse may bring worse through it. Strive your hardest, and Allah is the most Merciful.
Again, apologies if I've misjudged or misinterpreted what was said, please could you offer clarification. And Allah knows best. Love you sisters for the sake of Allah.
I agree. But I can see her point as well. I hope I'm right, but I don't think she is saying to be okay with being unpracticing in Islam, but rather don't be too harsh on yourself when suddenly you found yourself falling back 2 steps backwards. As humans, sometimes we are not perfect, we keep falling short and we are our worse critic and that 'critic' side of you can actually turn out being worse because you would one day hit a breaking pojnt and say to yourself that you are just shit and might as well leave the deen altogether and that is even worse.
To all muslims, even though you are struggling, maybe doing the salsa dance 1 step forward 2 steps back lol. But always don't give up in making few more steps forwrd no matter how often you occassionally step back and how long it is. For as long as you live, don't give up on Allah's rahmah and love and striving in that direction..
I’m so glad I’ve found your channel, these heart-centred conversations are a real gift.
This one hit so deep. Give thanks for the work you are doing ladies. You're so inspiring!
Wow Masha’Allah this may have been the best episode yet.
I watched this with tears in my eyes, you guys are truly amazing. Alhamdulillah, I’m glad i got to watch this. SubhanaAllah, this reminded of how beautiful Allah is, thank you.
Subhanallah, this episode was very emotional. Thank you for sharing your vulnerability with us
This talk is needed and I hope it is the start of this topic.
It is great to know about the consultancy.
Thank you for sharing your story
thank you for validating the fluctuation aspect of the faith. Im currently on a low and i feel relieved to find that its ok, esspeically at the start of ramadan this year. All the best!
beautiful and deep,at so many levels.Ma shhaa Allah..May Allah bless you.
You are all SO inspiring. This was very healing to watch, from a survivor ❤️
Thank you sister for sharing your story You thought us to listen 👂 when someone is going through change his life ask them before you judge them.
Quite an emotional episode subhanAllah, full of many lessons. May Allah subhana hu wa ta'ala bless the work you do in the community, despite the trauma you have gone through, and may He bless you for your authenticity. We need more real people in the community, and as a community we need to be more supportive and less judgemental, we are all doing our best with the resources we have at the time. May Allah heal all those that have gone through these kind of traumas ameen. Bluetooth hug @ Mayameen Meftahi x
Ma Sha Allah Beautiful sisters. Thank you all
AsSalamu Alaikum Thank you sisters! May Allah Subhanahu wa ta’ala reward you all for the work you are doing and your speaking about taboo topics of vulnerability as is very much helpful. I’m so happy to see you here Sr.Mayameen! I love Honest Tea Talk channel!
Mayameen your story is powerful.. Thank you for sharing..thank you sisters you all are amazing
Jazakallah khair sister i prey allah keep you strong and give you peace in your heart. You are so brave x
It's so important to look after kids, they wre so innocent and can't know who wants bad for them. We all need to look after these beautiful souls or dont have kids at all. There are many perverts that seek to harm the vulnarable children. Please take care of your kids, I don't mean we should be paranoid or being suspicous of everyone but just keep an eye on them especially as mothers and sisters etc...
Thank you sister for sharing your story you’re wonderful and strong woman
SubhanAllah absolutely courageous talk! So emotional. May Allah protect you all always Ameeeen
May Allah continue to give you all reasons to be happy, Aameen. Lots of love from this side!
SubhanAllah so empowering to go through this , this is what we learn from, duuas for the sister who went through this ordeal, may Allah sbt wash away her pain and bless her heart with immense happiness and peace ameen.
Well done Sister you are so brave and keep going with your strong self 👍🙏❤️
Masha’Allah May Allah continue to reward and strengthen you. You are amazing and so inspiring. Love you so much for the sake of Allah. Love you all really. Thank you all for all that you do. May Allah reward you.
I love you sis ❤❤❤❤ jezaki Allah khier for opening up. You are strong more than you belive. ❤❤💐💐💐💐
You guys have been there with me through some chalenging times and these videos have made my trials easier alhamdullilah even though you are not physically present with me i feel as though i have gone on my finding myself healing and growth journey with Sumaya, Aliya and Layinka. Jazakallahukhair for your work and for being real with us because it has helped so many of us to be real with ourselves. You gave us that courage and ook away the shame. Love all you guys fisabillilah
Sisters wow Subhanallah you taught me so much💖May Allah reward you for speaking up about this. May there be more beneficial talks like these.
Allah bless you all sisters.
Mayameen you're a powerwoman, so much courage.
Much of love
Maya is so inspirational; my admiration for her is off the charts
Longstanding viewer of HTT - just a quick feedback point:
Please have the mics closer to the sisters as max volume is not as loud as desirable (I listen while I commute)
I was always under the impression that this only happens in step families. The fact that it was her own flesh and blood doing this type of abuse has really been an eye opener for me. Allah tests the strongest ones. May you continue to shine as you do.
Your channel is amazing, the discussions make me feel like I'm back in college learning from the best people. You've got a non Muslim supporter here. Thanks for all of your work.
Alhamdullilah. So appreciate this topic. May Allah swt continue to bless u all. 🙏🙏
SubhanAllah. May Allah Protect Us & Bless All Of You sisters ❤. I see Sumaiyahs bump is gone, I hope the little one is doing great ☺
Amazing courage Masha Allah
Be strong We learn from you
Allahu Akbar she is so strong maa shaa Allah May Allah S.W.A continue to guide us Aameen
So amazing Subhanallah thank you so mucchh jazakumullahu khairan !!! :::))))
Subhanallah. I’m sending you love 💕
Masha’Allah
Great show and very inspiring women! ❤️
Bless you girl brave
Ma Sha Allah what a beautiful strong sister I are.may Allah set bless u always and protect u from any more pain.💕your sister mariam
May Allah swt
mansha allah ladies may allah bless you all aamin , iam so proud the way you Explaining Our Muslim community
Allah swt gives his battles to the strongest souldiers ! Ameeen
Alsalamu Aleikom sisters, Iam SALEH from Sudan, I like your episodes and I love you for the sake of Allah.
There was nothing wrong with this video this was a blessing , Mashallah
hello assalaam i really love what you guys do
Allhamdulillah
سبحان الله،
All man kind will continue to wrong or fall short, but Allah promised to continue to forgive us, so all my Muslim brothers and sisters, don’t despair the mercy of Allah. Hold on tight to the rope of Allah and InshaAllah He will guide you to the right path.
So far my fav episode to date sisters
Wow what a brave woman. I hope Islam has bought her peace inshallah.
Amazing story, of an amazing woman, I do wish that you would do an episode on the whole judgment thing, so many men and woman are taking off their hijab, stop praying, partying, how do you remain non judgmental towards that, I understand the don't attack them, pray for them part, but the don't judge them part is hard, how do you not take what they are doing as a step backwards, how do you remain partial over something as detrimental as religion and the pleasure of Allah and what he asked of us, it's like watching somebody commit a crime or something illegal and asking us to not judge them and just let them be, and not punish them, I don't know if I am making sense, but I really hope that you would discuss this so that I can see my shortcomings and blind spots.
Ameen islam is a gift of Allah. Don’t lose hope and don’t lose your hijab because of people. Islam is a way of life. Jazakllah Khayr sister. Inshallah you will be successful. Don’t let them haters get to you.
Masha ALLAH lovely sis.
Mayameen is a very brave woman.
Please someone tell me the name of the nasheed played at the beginning
Subhan’Allahi wa bihamdihi Subhan’Allahil Azweem❤️
Subhan’Allah❤️
Alhamdu lellah
Laa ilaaha illaa Allah❤️
Allahu Akbar❤️
Laa hawla wa laa kuwwata illaa billah❤️
May peace and blessings of Allah be upon our beloved prophet his companions and entire household Aameen❤️
I was asked to be a presenter on a live tv show for reverts and the things that were said about me because I was a white girl was horrendous, it went out live every Tuesday all across their world and it was a wake up call
Subhanaallah really? Like what sis? Not surprising, I've had racism from born 'brown' Muslims and it's unreal how so many of them don't think about how they come across.
Ayesha Pyesha omg my story is harrowing, I was a presenter on Takbeer Tv, of course it was mostly of another ethnic race and I got real bad stuff said, I think it was just to feel a slot in their airtime, I also appeared on Noor Tv twice but that was ok 👌
@Romeo - what?
Thank you sis , May Allah gladden you❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
27:06
That's what l want to hear
Please post links to where victims can get free help preferably speaking someone from our deen.
I can speak to someone much your guest went through to find herself
What is the song in the intro??
It's called Yawrood by Alaa Wardi 👍
The voice is a bit low on this video ,I hope that can be fixed
I have been a long time viewer and I see the potential of this series. I think the series would be more successful if opinions and strong statements where backed up by Quran and sunnah.
For example, I would’ve preferred if ahadith from prophet saw was used rather than an Arab proverb or opinions based off experience.
I also suggest not using experience to make innovative statements that may not be from the Quran and sunnah but rather taking the experience to support Quran and sunnah.
So far I think I only heard “they plan but Allah plans” that is ayah in the Quran
What is the Nasheed behind this video? Does anybody know? JazakAllah khair
Asalaamu'alaikum!! It's called Yawrood by Alaa Wardi
sumayyah hussain wa’alaikum assalam. JazakAllah khair xx
@@alimakhatun5117 wa iyyaki 💜
I love the song at the beggining of the video, what's its name please?
Yawrood by Alaa Wardi
@@souzanatsala7554 thank youu
@@wahibamaache2994 God Bless You Always
GOOD ON YOU MAYAMEEN!. MAY ALLAH BLESS YOU AND ALL WOMEN, AND ALLOW THEM TO RISE AND TAKE THEIR RIGHTFUL PLACE AND ROLES THAT HAVE BEEN DENIED TO THEM BY MEN WHO HAVE EXPLOITED THEM AND ABUSED THE LAWS OF ALLAH!.
Ameen
I am very proud of you
A salaam a lekam can you give the email of the sister Jazak-Allah khair
Suxanallah ❤️❤️
Yes allow crumble, do not answer to anyone else about your hijab, Allah knows best, I took hijab off and I got so many insults and backbiting
❤🖤
Abubakar patterson nice work