10 STOIC LESSONS TO HANDLE DISRESEPECT (MUST WATCH) | STOICISM
Vložit
- čas přidán 14. 05. 2024
- 10 STOIC LESSONS TO HANDLE DISRESEPECT (MUST WATCH) | STOICISM
📩 Claim your FREE Spot in our stoic newsletter ➤ thestoiccommunity.ck.page
REINVENT Yourself 👉 • How To REINVENT Yourse...
In this must-watch video, we explore 10 powerful lessons from the ancient philosophy of Stoicism that can help you handle disrespect with grace and dignity. Stoicism, a philosophy that has withstood the test of time, offers timeless wisdom that can empower you to face challenges with resilience and composure.
Remember to like this video if you found it helpful and subscribe for more inspiring personal growth content
Navigate through this video:
0:00 Intro
0:36 Stoics stay Calm
1:23 Stoics Reflect on Themselves
2:32 Stoics learn to Pause
3:48 Stoics have Empathy
5:42 Strocism is based on Virtue
6:50 Stoicism embraces Acceptance
8:08 Stoics use Humour
9:04 Stoicism means setting Clear Boundaries
10:04 Stoics Forgive
11:27 Stoicism will change your perspective
#stoicism #IronMind #stoicwisdom #selfcontrol #personaldevelopment #ancient #stoics #acceptance #emotionalbalance #lifeplan #personaltransformation #motivation #Positive #InnerGrowth #overcomingchallenges #Mental #innerpeace #self #positiveemotions #lifewithpurpose
Really hard to be stoic with a narcissist
Same here brother. You can do it. peace
The "grey rock" technique works with narcissistic abuse .
Stoicism, would encourage you to vary your strategy as to deal effectively with your adversary/ challenge while still maintaining virtue.
Exactly! My family is very narcissistic. And I of course am the scapegoat. Not easy
Sometimes, it's just best to walk away from certain people. Permanently.
This is the stuff kids should be learning in schools at an early age.
You are exactly right 👍
Most of the teachers are women, stoic teaching and accountability is a kryptonite for most of them.
They are too busy being taught to change their gender
As I teacher, i do agree
@@Gromkiiithere are male teachers. They're not teaching it either. So what's the excuse there?
Remember that when someone disrespect you, is a result of their personal thoughts and emotions, not a true representation of yourself and your values 👌🏻
Sometimes it's a response to an absence of respect from the other person.
Thank you. Your insight is simple but effective. It makes walking on by all the easier. ❤
Even as a 10 year old Boston kid in 1970 I've had a chip on my shoulder, always fighting older kids for bullying others or myself, I'm still the same way,l. My father told me, if you fight every Ahole you meet, you'll be fighting 24/7, he was right.
The hardest lesson is that. In someone else's story. Were the bully. The problem is we see others as bully so muchhhhh. That we are blind to it/prospect ourselves. (Shocking revelation but necessary one). Or parts we play align to same thing. I'm not suggesting anyone is a bully directly. But certain things we do can have a negative result for other people. Which amount to same thing in other people's minds. Abuse/bullying. Both same. Which is inherently stealing a piece of worth from another. There are about 30 main types of abuse and 300-500 different subheadings for each abuse.
So blind we don't see the UGLY in ourselves that resemble perhaps those they didn't like in the past. Which amounts to negative consequence for someone else. They say anyone can be bully. But what I think by anyone is really mean. Everyone. (But didn't have spine to say it). Such an elusive trap not to think of oneself as a bully. Because that's something we never do. But then later soon find yourself to be that person. In some form. Everyone like to think of themselves good. But are we? Do we really know what we do from outside perspective. Have we seen ourselves? In action. It starts where our limitations end. Perhaps haven't met enough people to truly see it inside ourselves. Areas we lack. The lesser good sides.
your father is very much wise and very much right
There sure are a lot of a-holes in the World!
Bully I have always found it was best act afraid this is to billed there confidence. You want them to feel so confident that they would never expect what is coming. It is at this time you stick them. 😃 bully gone. Danger gone.
@@brienwhite4936 always has been my philosophy, particularly at workplace. if they think u scerd the element of surprise is that much more powerful and destabilizing.
Never in a million years did I think philosophy would encapsulate my interests. Growing up is fun. 😂
Trruuussst me hahaha mad ting ❤
@@tommythespitter lol, no
@@FaithFilled. I was simply agreeing with what you said in your comment, merely a figure of speech. I wasn't literally asking u to trust me lol. God bless you 🙏🏼 ❤️
@@tommythespitter all good. 🙏
Brother same, I thought for the entirety of my twenties it was overkill thinking on every single minuscule part of my day.
Guess you’re right, growing up is fun. Our time is finite, why not milk every single second
1. Keep your calm-their behavior is a reflection of their erroneous thoughts, and negative emotions; others insecurity;
2. Reflect on yourself-are they telling the truth, then silently reform yourself in line with your envisioned values;
3. Pause-resist the impulse to react;
4. Practice empathy-have compassion on their ignorance;
5. Concentrate on virtue of wisdom and courage, respond with reason not emotions;
6. Embrace acceptance- you have no control with others. Happy with what you have, not compare with others what you lack;
7. Use Humor-or simply smile never take it seriously;
8. Set clear boundaries- be the mountain no matter how the wind howls never bow down to it;
9. Choose forgiveness-let go of negative emotions, with compassion in fighting justice and
10. Change your perspective -take the higher view and broader perspective. Never entertain vengeance, manage your emotions with reason. Everything and everyone shall come to pass, do not be too attached to temporal wealth, power or fame and even pleasures of the Earth.
Thank you for this
Maraming Salamat! ❤
Very similar to Christianity and Vedanta.
@@Vaejovis357turn the other cheek
Prudence, Temperance, Fortitude, Justice.
Admittedly, I have a hard time letting disrespect go. The urge to defend yourself against unfair or unjust criticism often overrides rationality, and it's hard to think clearly in the moment. It takes extreme willpower to walk away from painful situations, and even more to respond in a calm, collected manner. It has to become a daily habit before it can become a normal part of our psyches. Some days if just feels so hard to maintain.
True. If you keep calm, it will make the other person wonder if their unkind and hurtful words hit home. This will make them angrier because you don't show any emotion. The victory is yours. Then walk away.
Indifference 🗝 it's really, really hard at first and the urge to react keeps coming back in waves but they get less and less intense.
It's actually really good practise for lots of other things like no contact, grey rock, keeping boundaries firm, introspecting instead, and... for giving us lots of time to think on all the ways you could've responded but just couldn't bring yourself to dignify that level of disrespect so knew you had to end it. Journalling as you go helps recall. 😑🕊️✌️
@@barbaragonzalez3504 Yes, that's exactly what happened. They thought I'd react and when I didn't they went nuts for weeks, now they're trying to act like they're all good but you can still see the steam coming out of their ears and they're running so many triangulations it's become ridiculous as they're switching ppl way too fast you can tell it's just designed to annoy, upset and provoke emotional reactions.
We need adult to adult relationships not child to parent ones, I'm done, no one's got time or energy for that level of bs.
@@barbaragonzalez3504Oh and they brought up that they loathed themselves, then that they don't respect anyone but themselves and lots more .. really crazy stuff, that's why I'm here. Listen to what they say, it's actually chock full of confessions about themselves not us.
"You always own the option of having no opinion. There is never any need to get worked up or to trouble your soul about things you can't control. These things are not asking to be judged by you. Leave them alone." - Marcus Aurelius
Yes, we do understand that disrespect comes from the person's insecurities and jealously. If it happens repeatedly, we can't just keep taking it or they will walk all over us. Best thing is to avoid these people.
For so many of us, avoidance is not possible
But one does not have to suffer other peoples silly ideas and agressions all the time,even if it is only their own mental poverty,stupidity,or lack of judgement that is causing their behaviour.
@@redsuperman7739 it's tough if its a close family member.
@@justice791humour and responding as you choose, or not responding at all. Role play in your head to alter learned dynamics. "WHATEVER" in your head and keep moving forward as if the jibe never touched you. Pray for help. Good luck.
@@alexs7671 I think it's just easier to walk away and drop these kind of toxic people from your life even if they have been long time friends. You do know how narcissists work right? Of course, it hurts at the beginning but you have such a feeling of peace after they are gone.
1. Keep calm
2. Recognize your part, if any
3. Learn to pause in anger
4. Have empathy
5. Concentrate on virtue/be rational, maintain integrity
6. Embrace acceptance, you can not control the external
7. Use humor/do not take it seriously
8. Set clear boundaries
9. Choose forgiveness
10. Change your perspective, it is really not a big deal
11. Grow a Very Chadly Beard.
@@darkmetaOFFICIALlol I sure love them goodens
Thank you ❤
It is a big deal! It’s called Spiritual Growth.
Easier said then done
If they can make you angry or upset, they can control you. Don't be controlled by others.
I have been in a terrible 29 year relationship, when I met her she was 21, and I was 26, when we met she was already having major life issues and I fell for her deeply and I told her I could help her, well during the entire relationship I was trying to fix someone that wasn’t will to fix themselves but I didn’t give up because I always thought it would get better and here I am 29 years later sharing my life story. You can’t fix anyone and you can’t help others unless they are willing to fix themselves. These videos have help me a lot so thank you , divorce isn’t the end of my life but a new beginning. 😊
i get it.. going through the same thing waited to get it right for marriage.. only he had custody of a 2 year old.. now 25 years later they both are the same with the same issues too much to take ready to break... again i know what you feel
Don't get married. That forces people to be on their best behavior, all of the time. You were sold a pack of lies. And that got you played. Welcome to the future.
Agree my friend. I been with my women for 3 years. Had a daughter . She now changed totally into a phyco controlling and rude loud and abusive constant disrespectful. I haven't walked away because my little girl. But iv learned it's more harmful to raise her in a toxic environment and it's better in her my own place.
I got back from a cold day at work outside all day to find my bag had been packed .
She accuses me of all things she does. I thought I could fix her , and she seemed willing at first but she gets jealous over things i did 15 years ago when I didn't even know her.
She kicked me out with nowhere to go , she has no empathy , she never admits fault , she doesn't wanna learn to be better. Just always my fault .
Best thing is to suck up the huge rent fees and get out on your own ay
She can't help herself, it was all on you for choosing to tolerate her. Is it really important to "fix" her though? Nevertheless wishing you all the best to a new beginning.
It is sad it took you so long to understand this simple truth - you should never try and change people. It is hard enough changing ourselves.
Did you ever understand your reasons for such self harming behaviour? You may not be able to achieve closure and real growth until you understand your own actions.
I would argue sometimes that by not doing anything we empower them, with the confidence that there would be no consequences to their actions and would lead to an increase to their actions.
If someone insults or demeans me in some way my response is "thank you for your opinion". It immediately shows them that I don't care, takes them off guard, and that I think of their remark as nothing more than a simple statement. Coupled with a smile it can be effective in de escalating the situation.
I agree as I say something similar...” You’re welcome to your opinion 😊.”
Thanks for that
Yes, walk away , it's a narcissist trying to control you.
@@janeyjoesmith2127funny and clever
Good way to present yourself in the moment...but never quite sure what to do in the aftermath when you really are hurt. Should you pretend not to feel anything?
Being a nice person I always get frowned upon, talked less to meaning people make jokes at your expense, seen as feeble or weak, a push over or lack confidence. In the face of adversity I smile and keep on walking, those who wish to destroy your character will only get more frustrated because their insecurities do not affect your psyche meaning when people try to belittle and fail they only get more angry with themselves because they cannot project their insecurities upon you. Smile and walk with your head high no matter what type of difficulties you are experiencing
Met a man , named Roy masters.
He wrote a book “ how to control your emotions .”
Helped me enormously.
“ How your mind can keep you well .”
Those books are life changers.
Roy Masters , unlike cult gurus
Would never tolerate anyone worshiping him.
He often said “ never follow anyone who wants you to work for them who will not pay you ; and, never follow gurus who do not have nine to five jobs and EARN THEIR OWN WAY IN this world.”Perfect advice for avoiding cults.
I just found out this wonderful man died a few years ago ;who gave of himself so freely over the decades on his radio program.
R. I. P. Roy Masters . I still have many of his books . I am glad I had the experience of meeting Roy MATERS in Los Angeles in 1977-
Basically , his message was “ never follow anyone ( especially him)-but yourself .”
Thank you for mentioning this book 📖... Buying it!
I heard Roy Masters on the radio years ago portraying himself as some kind of sage, saying how important it is to control ones emotions. He really seemed to have it all together. He then started to talk about some guy he ran into, challenging him to a fight, over some incident, and saying how he accepted the challenge, and proceeded to beat the guy up. He then completely lost it. He started ranting and raving about how the US is full of cowards and bullies. So much for keeping your cool. 😅 lol.
You set this out like a poem that doesn't rhyme lol
@@amattu8347
The best poems do not rhyme
@@kevinmalone3210 Reuben Obermeister, I would never trust anyone, or any thing that changes it's name. Peace be unto you.
I wish the US would teach this in every school. So many children would grow up to be better citizens and happier adults.
Remember being a stoic also doesn't mean being a doormat and letting someone to continue doing disruptive behaviour.
I face disrespect often. It is the way i am perceived by others. I need to change the way I am perceived. I get angry. I get fed up with looking at the reasons they behave the way they do about me. So now I have more "tools" to help me cope. Yes, take a deep breathe, then reassure myself that I have worth. The initial reaction will pass.
I know what you mean. I'm very conscious of how I conduct myself and communicate, so I'm mindful to treat others with respect. Sometimes this comes across as weakness or a perceived lack of power, and not worthy of respect. I notice it a lot in the way other people communicate with each other, where respect doesn't even figure as important. This reduces the quality of interaction and overall human connectedness, as it creates defensiveness and hostility. As a species we really need to take a long look at this, if we are to progress and evolve. Life could be much sweeter if we didn't have to worry about being attacked or hurt by the careless disrespectful actions of others. The hardest thing to do is avoid stooping to the same level and responding in a disrespectful way. This goes against our values and principles, but it's not easy doing nothing either! Sending you respect for your comment 🌅🌸
These are principles that even a person with schizophrenia hearing mean thoughts can follow to create a better life for themselves. And I write this from my own perspective, me being one with schizophrenic thoughts and growing to handle them better after 5 years with no medicine and managing it with humor and grace in the name of my dignity.
Good lucky God bless
👍
My son must have an extremely severe case then. No one can even have a conversation with him.
@@donnamuller6460 I haven’t always been like this. Mine was drug induced. I had a “normal” structure before, so I knew what was living without it.
My first year was traumatic. And because once I caught myself being a risk not only for myself but for others, I stopped myself and thought “I will not believe every thought from now on anymore”.
And this started smoothing it out for me along time. Nowadays the schizo thought are almost gone, it’s like someone decided to lower down the volume since it was some sort of waste of energy.
For me, it helped me clearing out that even since before these episodes, not all my thoughts were already mine. I was a very mean and difficult person to deal with thanks to my thought patterns. And after that I started having agency and cultivating more positive and loving patterns instead of just believing that I was the one thinking all that, therefore I must express it to its full extent.
In an analogy, it’s like going to a restaurant. And, before, in that restaurant, they would only serve the dish they wanted, and I needed to accept and pay for it. Nowadays I can go to that restaurant and they will serve me a menu so I can choose, otherwise I can choose another restaurant with better conditions, prices, and a menu of my liking.
So before I was being served really difficult thought patterns that would result in rage almost every day. I got fed up with rage every day and got myself into drug abuse. And after the drug abuse I started having schizo symptoms as new thought patterns (even worse than before, because they started being not grounded in reality). After realising how worse that got, I figured out I could create better ones myself, and started serving myself with something that would not end up in being anxious and angry every day. And it has to do with the practices spoken about in this video (it so happens that at the same period in my life I was invested in a lot of stoicism and spiritual development videos on CZcams too).
I take a good quality high dose multi B vitamin supplement most days, and then if I notice my thoughts getting 'sticky' I have a B12 injection. Apparently some people don't absorb B12 through their digestive system very well so taking through injection or a liquid supplement under the tongue helps with it's absorption. I've not had a psychotic episode for more then 15 years now. I know it works for me and others I can't guarantee it will help you but it's worth it if it helps. All the best to you.
One line my wife loves when somone comes to me and disrespects me is "start over" they either get offended or repeat themselfs in a more respectful manner if they get offended I simply state "I want to hear what you have to say but I want it to be civil" simple as that my boss hates it but he has never given me disrespect since a few times of that. He now knows he can't push me.
LOVE THIS
Most people want to think we’ve got stoicism down. But like everything else inherent in the human experience, everything changes. I have yet to meet anyone who is consistently stoic.
My cats are very stoic😊
That's really odd, since throughout my life I've always been as nervous as a cat in a room full of rocking chairs.
I consider myself quite stoic, but I will say I am nowhere near perfect. I occasionally lose all my shit I have neatly collected behind my barrier. Hats off to anyone who is 100% because I am only 98% but that 2% gets loose
@@mattz4229 😀 😊🙂
Mine is a narcissist. (My cat)
@@JerseyLynne 😻🤣😻
I've learned that the only things I control are my emotions, my actions, and my attitude. I don't control the weather any more than I can control the neighbors down the street. Life got easier after understanding this.
Well. Generally yeah. But I think always being nonchalant person is not always thing. I suppose if got not just yourself to think about then yeah (like only family ahead of you). But for yourself idk. Personally I have thought.. some tactful things here there is good. But nothing too substantial. Light statements. If must interject be very tactful about it. But sometimes better to say nothing.
I think people would be more surprised then they know to see that people ARE receptive to thoughts than they would THINK. it's having preparation and right angle though. In the Same way a bystander might help friend in situation. Again being tactful about it. In the right way. I don't completely buy this always be quiet nonsense. Yes as a rule of thumb you should. But as with anything in life too much of anything can be draining to the soul. People will be receptive but only when done skillfully. And well thought.
Even more than that though. Is control internal emotion. But also controlling emotions of pain that have been brought on by others. Unfortunately many people are oblivious to pains in others brought on by others, they will only see it as YOUR PAIN. rather than many people's pain On you. unfortunately means managing others people's INJUSTS against you within yourself. AS WELL. not letting those pass on to others. Just as much. Life is more about managing OTHERS PAINS within you. Not your own. Life is ironic. This managing others emotions inside you too.
You are not here to control things. You are here to experience things. Your delusions will be stripped one way or another, eventually. Best to enjoy the ride while it lasts, and choose your company more carefully.
I had to practice test this morning with my son as he was going into a fit of anger because he didn’t want to go to school. I held my composure and I remembered everything this video said, and it actually worked. I didn’t have to go to work angry, and he slowly began to realize that I did not have the energy for him, and he apologized And then it was a beautiful day.
sçhopl suçk 21 centry agree with dngt goíng sçhopl 1980 sxhop with difent sçhop fun oartuees at schól
Beautiful comment
Whoever is reading this, never give up. God is with you.
Excellent. Now, if this was only taught in schools and practiced by adults as examples to children. Be in control of your emotions.
Kind of hard when being attacked left right and centre. Swept into yesteryear. For a taking/For a ride.
Biggest lesson is what you see in others is yourself in them.
These are the lessons a child needs to be taught by parents, first and foremost. Schools are not there to teach morals, beliefs and values.
Be in control of your emotions? So funny that a woman just preached that. Do you know any women?
I know another. Be in control of emotions. Yeah because one who isn't in control is more discrete in getting away with it. Where other must be forced to walk more difficult one. In their midst. Of not discovering the fuller truth. That is was not.. in fact. Their fault. And perpetrator knows something and deliberately keeps quiet so don't incriminate themselves. But I smell people holding back from a mile away. I know when something isn't right. Like it being reflective of own miscalculation. Own misconduct.
Be more in control. Yeah because you're the one getting away with it. Or because more expecting of other people/blaming other people than you are yourself. Cause enjoy hinging blame on others exponentialllyy.
Empathy works well until it doesn't. In some domestic situations this won't work. But this will come in handy for most customers I deal with every day. Thanks
This week extreme disrespect was visited upon me. Twice in one day. I laid in bed literally physically sick. I was not able to go to work.
Sure wished i knew about this here upload!
I live with a relative who has severe bipolar disorder and I find myself being disrespect ed several times a day. It is very hard to deal with at times. Watching these sort of videos helps to keep thinks in perspective.
Respect is given Trust is earned
Thinking back on my life, the times, events, and arguments I regret the most are those where I reacted emotionally. I am learning to let regret and guilt go and just do better. Our pastor, who is a wise and learned man, says we have to forgive, but we don’t have to put ourselves in the position to be offended against again. Thank you for this. I never really learned about stoicism in my education, and am enjoying learning about it now. So much wisdom. So little time.
I want everyone to make a book. Just 1 book. With own lessons. So they may pass it on. And not repeat pains.
With deep reflection I've found well only way to learn is to go through it. It's not very pleasant experience I can tell you, some of them might come to cause heartbreak/tear in yourself. It will always come down to some level of personal experience. Physical experience/knowledge. Which is the gold of all knowledge. Forgivness I found is number 1 in society. As to forgive others trespasses against us. It all takes time. We must explore deeper aspects of things so we can muster deeper compassion for people. At the end of the day. We're all human. Trying to make best out of what we can.
Unfortunately reality doesn't always mean the best for us. When we forsake a human-being we also forsake their capacity for goodness. Which could have come about into the world. We must endure, to our greatest ability to be best version of ourselves. Not letting ourselves fall. Until it has to. With compassion and understanding and bit of trying we can all love to endure each others trials. If you must endure pain for learning. Let it be based off an educated guess. Rather than an uneducated one/preventable one. Thus it will be next level up. (Than one below it). The most painful lesson in life is to be forgiven for a basic lesson (easily prevented). Always be guy who forgiven for the educated guess. This not allowing forgiveness it's own a bad rap.
Beautiful response
1. Don't take anything personal
2. Ignore them all
I really needed to hear this as my parents are both narcissistic and disrespect me daily. I'm a mother of a young child as well and feel as if they see me still as a child raising a child instead of an adult
Even when I was in my 60ʼs my Mom refused to acknowledge I was in charge of caring for her. Sometimes it is their own insecurities and inability to let go of control.
It is more likely that their stubborn self-delusion was rooted in easily dominating children without ever learning how to appreciate the life that they were gifted. It's an entitlement delusion, and sloppy, lazy human skills. You should punch her in the face and knock out her expensive teeth.@@jandunn169
Same here.. My parents too are narcissistic.. I hate them
This is very common and unfortunately still many parents do this. It is like owing their kids, regardless, till the rest of their lives. I would just move away for a long time to a place where they cannot follow, maybe too far for them, and not look for their company. Eventually this feelings will go and you will be able to stand up again. You should certainly not let them ruin you.
I agree. If your parents aren't helpful, leave them, move away. You only get 1 life, don't waste it being around people who like tearing you down, or who need to make themselves feel superior to you. Ilona is right.@@ilonacheema6088
The Beautiful Beings of Gaia would like to thank The Stoic Community for their service. We are forever grateful.
Glad you liked it. Thank you for watching
Wat ? Your no more human than anyone else. Beauty is only in the eyes the.beholder
Listening to this at 6 am. I wish someone had taught me this 20 years back.
I’ve been trying my hardest to understand how to handle my emotions. Even more so now that I am coming to find out I may have ADHD. I used to run only on frustration (working on my own, holding 3 jobs in a house of 5), and coke cola. I am now coming to understand that no one person should be under that pressure if others are not living within the means. I got Bell’s palsy and have a permanent reminder that you can’t just run on caffeine and frustration. When I was trying to get help from behavioral health, my case worker advised me that when I come across something that causes anxiety or anger, to “think it away.” I asked her how the hell do you do that and she just repeated herself. This has helped me refocus my emotions. I can be a very empathetic person but I can only deal with bs so many times that it begins to feel personal. People acting like jerks for no fokin reason I’ve given em. But this has reminded me that disrespect is like someones work, the boss might allow their bs but eventually the truth comes out. Let it go and let their true self show. Move on and let them deal with their own crap. You ain’t got to forget what they did or say, you just got to let go of the feeling that was stirred by their issues. To help you keep inner peace. Thank you very much. ❤
You're on the right track my friend.
If you have adhd carnivore helps❤
Living within the means? To live?
Your right society is very like that. Told to quench our emotions. But bs is like rest of society. Should be taught how to validate emotions and forgive. Rather than unforgive (as extension) and invalidate emotions. It's very washed up. And control only makes people more greedy on process. Rather than uncontrol. Unpower. Aka forgiveness. If you want validation though? Validate yourself take it from me. Make books about it so may be seen and recorded in history and validated based off potential future, if ever came to it. People are mindblind.
In fact so in need validation I validated people next week. And they thanked me like there was no tomorrow. It was was like bear grills. Where hadn't ate for a month. And had honey from tree. That's how I see validation these days. Like Oxygen supply after hour of having it. Be lucky to have. Just think about the kind of society we live in for people to be like that. I take it's a dying breed these days. In fact we've become more attached to invalidating people than validating people. Sad to see. Sry to see people don't question things as should. Because let me tell you being right and invalidated is very painful experience. Unfortunately people can't translate invisible to real. Does not compute to them. Don't see how it goes from one nozzle to the other. Hence why get so confused up on first place. I assure abstractifying people's pain not cool either. Tying them into a tidy knot. REAL has no meaning to people.
I'm going to keep this video close and reflect on it when someone tries to distribute my peace. Thank you
THANK GOD,MY PARENTS TAUGHT US TO RESPECT OTHERS SINCE WE WERE YOUNG AND STAY HUMBLE.❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Humble people don't type using all caps....... busted.
👂!!!
@@marcillioficino4663 I HAVE EYESIGHT PROBLEM,BESIDES,
MY RIGHT EYE IS BLIND.THINK BEFORE YOU GIVE AN OPINION,YOU NEVER KNOW THE PROBLEM PEOPLE UNDERGO,WHY I HAVE THIS BIG LETTERS.MAY GOD ENLIGHTEN YOU TO BE SENSITIVE TO OTHERS.BLESS YOU.BY THE WAY I AM 70 YR.OLD AND SICK.ARE YOU A NARC?YOU SOUND LIKE ONE.YOU ARE DESCRIBING YOURSELF.
Thank you for your video. I was disrespected by my narcissistic ex wife for 5 years. Now I am divorced and I respect myself again
"Wise is the warrior who carries a weapon, but rarely reveals it." --Master Dupree' (DD4)
🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨
"Before I start, I must see my end.
Destination known, my mind's journey now begins.
Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed.
In time, all points converge; hope's strength, re-steeled.
But to earn final peace at the universe's endless refrain,
We must see all in nothingness...
Before we start again."
🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨
--Diamond Dragons (series)
Beautiful comment
Resonated with number 9,, truly "forgiveness" is the key to a peaceful life. Let go and give it to God. 🙏🙌
I respect your interpretation and personal choice in ‘ giving it to God ‘ 👍🏻
Walk away from people who disrespect you. This way you can be free of drama.
i have trouble with this. Disrespect is an inherently personal sleight and while i can dismiss it for my own sake and the sake of the situation - what i cannot abide is the idea that i should take an empathetic standpoint toward their disrespect, even when there is a token of truth in it. Such disrespect is something i actively avoid as a principle no matter how i feel and to receive something so unconstructive from a person tends me toward not really givng a single shit about why that person feels that way. You've shown me you care so little about me as to personally sleight me on purpose - i feel its only right to return the sentiment when they make their feelings about you clear. No outcome can be for the good that involves that person any longer.
I found myself in exactly this situation today. It was so frustrating and touched on every aspect of this video. I'm not sure if I handled it with the dignity and grace I would have liked, but I was dealing with a particularly loathsome and self righteous bigot. The level of contempt and disrespect from him was unlike anything I'd ever seen, and he was so full of himself and the rubbish he was spouting. Normally I'd ignore such folk, but something got under my skin and I felt compelled to call him out on his nonsense. He didn't like that at all and tried to annihilate me, but he underestimated my communication skills and perceptive abilities. By the time I was finished I'd destroyed every argument, and he fell into every trap I set for him to trip himself up. By the end his fake bravado was shot to pieces and he was revealed as the insufferable jerk he is.
Respect is one of the most important things to me. I always try to conduct myself by respecting others, or treating them with respect anyway as it goes a long way. This video has made me feel a bit better about the incident today, as I don't think I did too badly.
Brilliant! Worth watching multiple times! Reminds me of what Socrates said "The unexamined life is not worth living" Wish I had these lessons presented when I was younger!
Im teaching these techniques to local kids
Children should be taught about their emotions and how to deal with them. Then when they grow up they can handle most everything life throws at us.
It's always like the universe sends me what I need when I need it. Been very disrespected by people in my work place and my company. I needed this; I need to delve back into philosophy once again. It made me such a better person.
Been on a journey…was faced with a disrespectful situation with an older brother…..this defiantly helped my thought process…I realize that I’m a stoic….always have been…just a little rough around the edges…71…I always put people first when I’m in front of them….then the phone rings!….I’m a much better person…..
AMEN
Beautiful story
Stoicism consists of two parts; accepting the valid principles talked about in this important video, and also "training" the mind over time to make them an automatic default response when they are most called for in a personally challenging situation. Stoicism is both a core set of beliefs and also a personal habit.
This video really helped me out today . It has been a roller coaster week. I woke up ,to bad thoughs idealing in my head. After listening and understanding the message of this video, I grew back to my self, the rock that I am. Thanks.
Glad it helped. Thanks for sharing this
Beautiful comment. Stay strong
It called SELF esteem for a reason. IMO, we can’t allow others or situations to dictate how we feel. Also saying NO is a powerful tool that allows ourselves to flow within our limits and standards.
Empathy and kindness. Tried that. Didn't work. The person escalated psychotically. Surveillance cameras and recording everything is what worked.
How wonderfully wise! Forgiveness as the ultimate act of self care! Wow.
Thank you!
Unfortunately for me, I grew up in Roman Catholic household, so breaking FREE took time!
Setting hard and soft boundaries; however, some cultures and organized religion can impede in self growth!
I am free
I practice walking away because some human beings are not as evolved
At times, it is best to also walk away…
I am Catholic and find much of this to be congruent with the teachings of Christ. It need not be an either / or. Take the wheat and leave what you believe is the chaff. Stoicism and the Catholic Fathers both teach controlling our passions. See Phillipians 4:8.
I learnt these powerful lesson from my (3) traditional elders from their Indigenous perspective, it helped me throughout my healing and wellness journey (29 years)…this is an awesome follow-up and reminder to never lose focus...I'm still learning and want more before I leave Mother Earth for my next journey!
Thank You so much found out this morning my husband still talks to an ex he promised not to speak to once we were married he has lied to me 3 times about the same female... this time I wanted to respond different to show up for me. I'm a good God fearing woman I serve others and mean no one any harm .... harm keeps finding me. I'll use these principles, they align with Father God to me as well
Thank you I needed to word
Kind of a drag our 1 year anniversary is two days away..... I cancelled my plans
1 year and no kids, I hope? I think true stoicism is to just walk away without feeling too much, it will not get better. It's a reflection on him, not you. Careful about serving others too much. It attracts users.
I'm a carpenter for about 15 years. I know a lot, but don't pretend to know everything. I believe its a team effort. In any case, I've always felt coworkers don't respect my position or wisdom therein. Maybe its because I'm very young looking still at 45. Maybe its my quiet demeanor. But when I get constant reminders from all coworkers, I start to crack, and lose my "cool" Then I run into the same issue with every job; someone takes offense to me getting mad at this. I'd like to be more assertive in addressing this, but that's a hard hill to climb.
@nautilaz...I hear you. Maybe take a good look in the mirror..or...is there someone you can trust to help you alter your demeanor? Body language may be your key...running into the same issues, job after job says something concerning how you come across, not how you want to be viewed...coming from one who has faced similar circumstances. Thanks.
I have been going through a situation with three of my neighbors for more than two years now. I have been more than patient with building management to resolve this issue. I've tried literally everything that I've heard from this lesson. I am not happy with the results of this situation. As of right now, they are two of my neighbors who continue to harrass me.
I think I have almost mastered these actions, but have taken a lifetime to learn how!
This is the work that we need to study from a young age! The Practice of Compassion using our beliefs as a shield to create boundaries! Then to solve problems with dignity making a better world in the process!
I have been learning about myself for many years...at age 77, I have arrived at a place where I am doing much better with the issue addressed in this video. I am so grateful that I have made it so far from where I began.....personal growth is paramount to living a successful life.
You have integrated ancient wisdom to nowadays problems in a concise and practical manner. I thank you for sharing these thoughts with us
Beautiful comment
1) Keep your calm. Just because the disrespectful action is a result of the other person's issues doesn't mean it's not harmful to you. I've found that knowing WHY someone does a certain action only helps you move thru the hurt caused faster. That's because you can put the action into a framework. However - knowing why someone did something doesn't in any way stop the hurt from occurring the next time the person repeats the disrespectful behaviour. Just because there is no intent to harm doesn't mean an action isn't disrespectful.
There is - quite simply - ZERO reason to be rude & ill mannered. This includes asking first, not doing an action to another you know they will not appreciate, accepting the other as a valid person.
True! I am a very patient person to everything and don't desire material ownership because I will lose against those who do. Let them worry about their stuff I don't have the time to argue about it. Let that anger go to someone else who is weaker or wants to fight it.
Watching this, it seems perhaps I'm already somewhat more stoic than I thought. I've certainly seen positive examples set by people who exhibit stoic virtues. I have one remaining concern about a particular type of disrespect, though. I still grapple with my feelings about people who mistake my kindness for weakness. This video shares a good message and affirmation for me. Helpful.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts and personal experience with stoicism.
Looking back I realize I should have instilled more of these types of principles as well as more Biblical ones in my kids. Schools should be teaching these things also. These are life skills in a sense
Im teaching local kids these techniques
You know as much as I understand this sometimes disrespect is just disrespect. Some people just get satisfaction out of just disrespecting you 🤬
So true!
I've forgiven over & over never changes their negative behavior so these days when someone disrespect me I'm done with them.
“The one thing you can’t take away from me is the way I choose to respond to what you do to me. The last of one’s freedoms is to choose one’s attitude in any given circumstance.”
- Victor Frankl
“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms-to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”
- Victor Frankl
As a man closed linked to the society I live in , apart from these beautiful stoic quotes, I would rather agree with Nietzsche that a man has to be tough, powerful and proactive in life. A man who is disrespected personally, all of a sudden , doesn't have time to reflect on himself, on his strengh, weakness, and ask what is more appropriate for him at the moment. There is no time. On the spur of the moment he has to show he has character, that he is not meek and harmless. Stoicism is good when you have time to think , when you are disrespected through the 'media ' or as a result of gossipings. But I am convinced that a blasphemous disrespect in public should be responded accordingly, with energy, even cruelly( with words, for sure). There are annoyances we can't avoid; and there is no concept of ' peace and love' for all situations.
Stoicism, to a certain extent, is an Utopia. History shows that human being has not incorporated it throughout the centuries. " Notes of Underground " by Dostoevsky can clarify that. Stoicism has remained a theory. And its only target now is the resignation of people, acceptance of ' satus quo' and a dominating strategy of the oligarchies and the States that rule the world.
Open your eyes wide. Start arguing and thinking differently of the establishment_ you will avoid being manipulated.
"One's fear is lighter than the danger at hand." - Secena
Wow, this is best advice I have ever got in life🎉 . It has relieved me from stress
Glad it helped
After facing recent strife in my personal life leading to a miserable past couple days I've learnt after watching this video that I've unknowingly have internalize a lot of these principles while being too immature to embody them completely.
The worst time to fail, is the last time one endeavors to try.
No matter how many years of experience, even the most wise will be subject to mistakes.
Learn from mistakes, rather than the fact one was made.
Thank you "Sir" for your patience for giving this "Ancient Wisdom"...
"Begin the morning by saying to thyself, I shall meet with the busy-body, the ungrateful, arrogant, deceitful, envious, unsocial. All these things happen to them by reason of their ignorance of what is good and evil."
Fabulous reminder on how to be a goodly human. Thank you.Stoicism needs to be embraced by humanity right now.
Thank you. I think it's sinking in. I'm glad i'm old. Went through life as a white knuckled raw nerve. Came from a milieu where tantrums were the norm. Impulsive reactions happen becsuse...why? A deeply embedded sense of danger
Thanks for sharing, it was relatable
Salute
@@tanookis_nookie2056fr fr
Feeling lighter now, after all the said event gone through my life. Earlier our thoughts were about why this happens to me in my life, now I realise all this are part of our life, how to see the things that occurs in our life and to overcome and how to view them. I had gone through both personally and professionally, now got better view. Let me try to apply in life...Thanks for ur video...
Thank you for sharing your thoughts and personal experiences. It's great to hear that you have gained a better perspective on life and how to overcome challenges. I hope that you continue to apply these insights in your daily life. Thank you for watching my video and taking the time to leave a comment.
Rarely do I encounter such practical wisdom such as contained in this video. I learn from it that I have made progress in my life when dealing with negative people; but, I learn that I have more maturing to do. I am truly grateful for the effort put into this video.
Thank you for widening my HORIZON in regards to, too much absorbed self-ego and too ignorant. A user, I can breath much better now.
Again, thank you for these life's changing 🙏
It's an eye-opener. Thank you
I felt I’ve always been stoic. But this video wisdom has reminded me, and encouraged me! Thank you for putting the time and effort into making this video.
😮Thank you. Listening to you, I hear my grandmother's words of wisdom. I loved spending time with
her and how she lived, the manner, behaviour she exhibited. I wanted to be just like her. I left her when I was twelve, became an immigrant. As I got older her advice made more and more sense. We wrote to each other but I needed her very much in person and often. Again, thank you.❤❤❤😊
Lovely comment
This needs to be Shared with 45. Just maybe he can learn something. Have compassion and deal with things found in this video. Thank you for this.
I'm learning lessons at midlife with my first supervisor job. I really hoped the 'honor' system would work but it doesn't because you'll always have that one person take advantage of it. I'm a sensitive person and it's a double edged sword because being open and honest with people that are less than honorable is a painful experience. It's easy in practice but applied to real life is a different matter in that I might appear stoic on the outside but it's because I internalize everything. Just the way I am with a plethora of thoughts always going on inside.
I really appreciate this video. What has helped me is the teaching that being disrespected is a part of life and we should accept it and grow from it. If we’re always hoping to avoid it we will be disappointed because it’ll always be there. What a gift knowing that we have the potential to turn things around and strengthen our character by applying stoic principles.
Great attitude 🌸
Or....you could just kick her in the puss*, and annouce to her, "That's enough of that, unless you want more?".
Great comment
We don't have our whole lives to be patiently enduring other people's B.S.@@luxemindsetofficial
Aint nothing that a 9mm and a bali cant handle!
my Already Strong Stoicism increased ten fold upon clicking on this
#6 is above all. Especially during today. You’ll find yourself in opposition of others. Those people will likely have no intention of learning. All you can do is accept and move on.
I used to fight the environment around me, the people around me. But I soon realized, there was no valuable gain from doing so. Instead of fretting, I accepted and learned that I will do what I can, and move on. There are many other problems to address
So true ❤
How appropriate this video showed up in my queue today. I work a part time job in a retail store as an on-line shopper. I stopped by the sea food department to ask if a certain items was located and this guy; I've picked up a negative energy from him since I've been there, little more than a month now, and He says "DON'T PUT THAT PHONE IN MY FACE AND IT'S RIGHT THERE! I said, I didn't put the phone in your face; I was several feet from his face. Also, I always will say, "Excuse me." Or "Good morning." then pose my question. I didn't flick off back at him and found out he's the manager of the department. Yes, I was mad internally, but chose not to match that disrespect towards me back at him. I went to one of the front end store supervisors to complain and whom was to speak with the guy. I also spoke to my team leader who was to follow up. Yes, in the past, I've "went off" on people I found disrespected me, but now, I take a "keep it calm" mentality. I have too much going on in my life right now, especially financially, to let someone's negative attitude bring me down. And yes, I thought about what I may have done wrong to trigger him, he may have things going in his life , or he's just tired of people asking for help (being disturbed ). But, that's no excuse for that type of behavior especially if you're a manager.🙏🏽
Toxic feminism cant handle stoicism. But me as someone with female body(got influenced by female hormone daily) find stoicism is very liberating. Learn how to cope with emotion, accept it, embrace it, admit that i am hurt, then bring in the stoicism perspective and I'm ready to go again. Balancing masculine and feminine is the key
stoicism is incompatible with radical leftist queer and trans ideology.
Yeah the Jung anima/animus thing
U got that right. 👍
If disrespect comes from one’s narcissistic views and intend to belittle the other, there is no constructive way to react. Some say that silence is the way in such situations, however these kind of people take silence only as approval of their toxic and harmful way to continue. In these instances the only possible way to win this situation and prevent it from happening again, is to cut them out of our lives. We need to remove ourselves because our worth and practise of self love don’t deserve to be put into test of us questioning It
Thank you God for recommending me this video 🙏🏽
It’s very sad that there is so much hate. The hate replies to my comments on CZcams and Facebook where so hateful that I had to turn of all replies to my posts and comments on both platforms. Only my groups can comment now on my Facebook page. We live in a very evil world full of nasty mentally disordered trolls. 😢
Aww I feel for you I felt exactly the same way the past few days! It's been one of those weeks where I seem to have come across some of the worst examples of humans, too many in a short time. It's left me feeling sad and frustrated as I'm afraid to post anything in case it attracts trolls. Sending you a hug if you need it as a troll antidote 🌸🌅
This is over-complicated and too rational. When someone disrespects you it means they want to challenge and dominate. Primitive impulse found in all nature. You have to develop self-confidence above everything else, and know your true worth. Just calmly call out their bullshit. Don't tolerate crap. This is the equivalent of looking someone in the eyes and standing your ground. Stand up for yourself and defend your ground. Verbally and maybe physically if needed. That simple.
If someone puts their Hand on my loved ones or if they threaten them, I am not gonna take several seconds to collect myself. I’m gonna start punching and swearing immediately.
It's not over complicated it's actually very simple. There is a time and place for everything and what you just described isn't the answer to everything and neither is Stoicism.
Everyone has the right to live with dignity(Human rights)
The ability to avoid acting/speaking out impulsively, when triggered, has paid off well for me. I've learned to put emotions aside, breathe in some calming breaths, keep the tone unemotional, and never speak in an accusatory manner - even if the other party legitimately deserves to be sent to the slaughter for the evil they perpetrate on unsuspecting victims. This is how narcissists should always be handled, then find your opportunity to defect from their existence, where no-contact is a must in your own survival.
I disagree. They disrespect you because they don’t value you, they believe they are better than you, they have their own insecurities, they are narcissistic, they are mean spirited. It isn’t my responsibility to take on the burden of their issues, or their hate. I will retaliate, and walk away. These people neither deserve my respect, or compassion. With people like this, your best efforts only cause derision.
Hate and disrespect can be due to various reasons. Those you mentioned, but most notably left out are jealousy and fear.
“Everyone deserves your respect and compassion, even if you are convinced they don’t merit it, even in the face of unkindness” Accepting and actioning this, is a stoic staple, and potentially the greatest art to perfect to become the good man you were destined to be.🙂💪
No! Not everybody some need to get what they dish out.
Christ said, turn the other cheek. This encapsulates all that's mentioned in the video.
@@nugaoluwafemi4228 if you turn the other cheek you will forever be a punching bag.
I let them voice their opinions- my grandson is too important to me. I know the truth. I am their scapegoat. I choose to give love and be loved over nonsense. ☮️💜✝️🇺🇸
minus points for the american flag.
@sonquatsch8585 I'm American. I've been attaching it to everything I do, and it's not going away. 🤷♀️ now you will always know it's me. ☮️💜✝️🇺🇸
I just found out I'm a Stoic person, and here I taught i was just really composed.
I just found your channel, New subscriber here, thank you for sharing th truth. Part of growing up. Not fun or easy but essential part of life.
Thank you for your amazing work.
Nothing easier than dealing with disrespect. Don't be proud. Pride is just glorified arrogance. If you aren't proud and aware of your flaws, disrespect won't upset you.
Thank you stoics stoisism changed my life and i do believe it is the answer to all our problems. I recommend everyone to stoisism
I got a message years ago. Be still, God is in control. Works in the face of a lot of aggressive a holes.
Thank you All for this, these:Content and for all these sincere contributions. I am excited so many like-minded continue to strive and to courageously share for others to grow ~
Thank you for your kind words and appreciation