How a Pope's Nepobaby Became One of the Worst Tyrants in History • Puppet History
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- čas přidán 3. 08. 2023
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CREATED & HOSTED BY
Shane Madej
WRITER
Garrett Werner
PRODUCER
Lizzie Lockard
POST PRODUCER
Sam Young
DIRECTOR
Anthony Frederick
FEATURING
Ryan Bergara
and Zach Kornfeld
EDITOR
Charlie Clay
Ethan Ramos
ORIGINAL MUSIC
Hughie Stone Fish
Patrick Volker
Shane Madej
RESEARCHER
Alaina Rook
COORDINATOR
Carter Lau
PRODUCTION ASSISTANTS
Violet Rawlings
Brendon Ryu
DIRECTOR OF PHOTOGRAPHY
Jay Tran
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Brendan Yoo
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Ben Forman
PRODUCTION DESIGNER
Billy Jett
ART DIRECTOR
Darren Dematteis
SET DRESSER
Arron Haro
PROFESSOR PUPPET BY
DLUX Puppets
GUEST PUPPET BY
Madison Girifalco
ADDITIONAL VOICES BY
Joyce Louis-Jean & Garrett Watts
MOTION GRAPHIC ANIMATORS
Mike Fox & Mattea Guldy
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Crystal Cheng
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Travis Purvis
ADDITIONAL EDITING
Anthony De Vera
Sam Young
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Frank Parker
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Love this channel!🎉🎉🎉🎉❤❤❤
Why is Watcher so amazing?
(Are we watching Watcher or is Watcher watching us?)
beating it to the professor rn
@@jplaysgamez_ Watcher's watching YOU fs
You left out a pretty major part, where he was a Templar, and was killed by Ezio Auditore over the apple of Eden.
"We're not doing wife guy shit."
"Why Zach?"
That is SO out of pocket Ryan goodness gracious, I love it
omfg i love it
So messy lolol
Im out of the loop. Looks like Zach just got married this year. Is that the joke?
😂😂😂
lmao
Zach: "Alright we're not doing wife guy shit."
Ryan: "WHY ZACH?!"
I'm deceased.
Timestamp?
@@sundushyder143 12:57
Ryan could barely finish the sentence lol
As much as I’m sure Zach is done with the Ned jokes, Ned is a terrible person and he deserves all the roasting
@@issa5806bro i cant even watch those videos he gives me such a bad vibe not just because of the cheating but he just feels icky to watch like i cant explain it
You kinda underplayed how humiliating Cesare's death was. He chased after the guys, only to get separated from the rest of his men, he was then murdered and stripped naked of everything, including the mask he was wearing to hide the fact he had syphilis, and with nothing but a red tile to cover his balls.
But to give the noseless guy credit where it is due, he did go down swinging.
Dang, I thought he was dropped off a building after the best Assassin's Creed game's final boss fight.😂
@@insearchofthenewmanageri just realised dude's in the game
let me tell you, this is the WILDEST comment to read before finishing the video
Oh my goodness I didn’t learn THAT in School.😂😂😂
zach and ryan together always results in insanely out of pocket behavior
Love that for him
I know the whole gag is that Ryan always loses and the guests win, but I think the gag should be reversed when Steven Lim is on the show. Like Ryan always wins when Steven is on but no other time
That would legitimately expand my lifetime by 5+ years every episode
I like this.
Anything is better than just him always losing. Way overplayed.
No. No Steven Lim. He is way too annoying. And they stopped the gag ages ago.
@@stevenchoza6391he won EVERY episode since that whole scheme was going on
Zach’s little “ba da da da dah” at 3:30 is so cute bc you can tell that he actually watches and loves this show😭🥹
It made me so happy cuz I also do that for every question
I appreciated it!
Ikr, I got excited seeing him back an this time actually being able to properly interact with the prof (I think it was him that was in n ep of university or was it Keith or both 🤔 idk it was 3yrs ago 😂) ❤ still love it.
@@locabsgg94 they both did an episode! i've been waiting for zach to come back as well, the episode he was in is one of my faves 😆
@@locabsgg94 Both did an episode of online university.
It's adorable that you guys don't think any Sims players have designed elaborate and whimsical Poundtown Rooms.
That made me laugh. There's an entire "adults only" mod out there dedicated to just that sort of thing! (And it's even referenced in some of the items in one of the expansion packs!)
Ryan's 'reformed murderer' energy really is something this season.
the season itself might not have lore (debatable), but Dorothy Ruth sure does
She's a complicated mare.
She needs to drop an album
Do I smell molasses.??
The show has a ton of lore!! Just not this season!
@@Fandomsaremylifeewell... didn't Ryan use a genie wish to save the Professor? Does that mean he owes the genie? The genie is pretty vindictive...
i absolutely appreciate scentbird for allowing a sponsored segment be read by the world's horniest horse puppet
A treasured tradition on Puppet History.
it weirdly makes sense bc why are so many perfume ads horny as hell anyways?
Scentbird must be cool with a lot. I was watching the latest video of Fundy Fridays yesterday and they also did a great yet weird ad for it. I didn't even skip!
Is it me or did he sound like Lazlo?
I STILL hear, "FLEUR.... gasm" haunting my ears. Scentbird gets huge props for being so up for interesting ad presentations!
I love how Zach characterizes Cesare as someone who would say "I can't just die here!" and super into himself when Assassin's Creed Brotherhood LITERALLY makes that into a major plot point for the end of the game. Also, very sad that no Assassin's Creed references were made.
I was waiting for some references or at least the comments taking a cheap shot.
I've been trawling the comments looking for references but alas they are lacking
finally my people! the oh did you know leonardo worked for cesare? like uhhh yeah those glider missions were a pain in my ass. then no one knew about master assassin machiavelli 😔
The way Zach is holding Ryan's hand at the beginning while saying "let's make this the best one ever," is the EXACT way my cats will gingerly lay a paw on the other's face before absolutely smacking tf down
ETA: Nepotism’s word origin literally comes from the practice of popes appointing relatives to high positions in the church during the medieval and Renaissance.
Genuinely would love if the Professor did Henri II, just because he has the most unbelievable way to die that actually happened.
"ETA"?
@@jefftraboulsy8631 edited to add
how did he die?
Right, nepotism from “nipote” meaning “nephew.” Because popes weren’t supposed to have sex so their kids were all “my uh, nephew.” Wink.
@@iheartbusterk82 ty
The Borgias had quite an impact. They inspired the Lannisters on _Game of Thrones,_ Cesare is the poster child for Machiavelli's _Prince,_ and that song from "Horrible Histories" still lives rent-free in my head.
They sure did.
I know, right?
Lucrezia, Giovanni,
Geoffrey, and Cesare,
Italian Barry army,
The Borgia family!"
The HH song was echoing off my brain the entire time (that and the fact that I believe it's implied, in the books at least, that Hannibal Lecter, of all people, is descended from this lot (his mother was a Sforza))
HORRIBLE HISTORIES!! I knew there was a reason borgia sounded familiar!!
Ryan makes a "Pope Daddy" joke and no one even tells him that "pope" actually means "papa"?! That translation makes the name that much funnier. The chai tea and Sahara desert of pope names.
It’s clear that they discussed the Banquet of the Chestnuts and EDITED IT OUT. I would have LOVED to have seen Ryan’s and Zach’s reactions to that.
In fairness Shane already covered it. Before Puppet History, Shane made a show called “Ruining History” where Ryan and Sara were also in all of those episodes back in B*zzfeed. One of the episodes he talked about were bad popes and one of them was Pope Alexander, mentioning the Chestnut parties and even having someone act as him 😅
@@venerandoalamaresjr.8910 I forgot about that show!
I really liked Ruining History! I still remember things from it I'm sure my history degree covered.
But my professors never used props.
as a resident horse girl, i'm so proud of the professor and zach for pronouncing and describing dressage correctly 😂
DreSAHJ not Dressij lol
@@emilysmith2965 I don't know.... @nataliecowdrick8002 has a horse in her profile pic and everything. She seems like the expert here.....
It is indeed the whitest of all horsely pursuits. It could only have been more accurately described as "some white GIRL shit."
Horse girls unite.
Saying it like it rhymes with "message" makes me think of salad dressing, lol. "Would you care for some dressage upon your bowl of leaves?" That kind of thing.
Machiavelli explicitly made fun of Cesare for hiring a bunch of mercs and then having a surprise pikachu face when it didnt work out for him. Called it using someone else's arms, and it was a rookie move.
Well, to be fair, everyone used mercenaries at the time. Wars between city states, basically boiled down to who had the most money to hire the most mercs to intimidate the enemy and frequently never actually involved any real fighting. The Mercenaries were completely fine with this, after all, fighting was dangerous and it's not exactly much good getting paid, if you're too dead to spend it.
@@Raven_The_Huntress That was actually part of the process. City-A, Hires Mario's Wardogs and offers them 5000 Ducats to go bully City-B. City-B, then offers the Wardogs 10'000 Ducats to go burn some of City-A's farms. So, City-A offers 15'000 Ducats to raid City-B's caravans. Both sides just keep at this, offering more and more money until one side can't match the other's offer and then they capitulate.
This is why the city of Urbino was so incredible, because they offered their armies as mercenaries, but once they made a contract, they never went back on it, no matter how much more they were offered. So, they got paid by the other cities to just not fight for ANYONE.
@@weldonwin
That's also why the Swiss mercenaries were some of the most sought-after in Europe.
Apart from the fact that they were very well disciplined in pike formations and almost never broke, they also never once went back on a contract. Swiss mercs fought to the death against overwhelming odds for causes that weren't even their own multiple times.
Sending your surplus lads abroad to fight in foreign wars was actually an important part of the Old Confederation's economy.
@@sherlocksmuuug6692 Which is exactly why the Pope employed them as his personal guard and still does to this day
@@weldonwin
Really paid off in 1527 when Rome was stormed and sacked by the unpaid mercenary army of the German Emperor. The largest part of the guard (147 fellows) took formation on St. Peter's Square and died fighting to buy time for the rest to evacuate Clement VII to the Papal panic bunker, Castel Sant'Angelo.
Puppet History has been going on for so long and the Professor has become such an iconic character, that I don’t even realize he’s Shane sometimes. Like, I’ll be watching these and my brain doesn’t make the connection that Shane Madej is back there moving that puppet around
Kinda the point of puppets
Kinda the point of puppets
"A lot of history depends on what men could and could not do with their dicks."
Wise words, Corndiddy.
If I had a nickel for every time God interrupted a song and then started singing with the other performing puppet, I’d have two nickels, which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it happened twice
2 nickles is 1 dime and according to the Bible you owe God 1 whole cent of that
Weeeeeell, to be fair, history does repeat itself. 😂😅
The Professor's new glasses are so shiny, and I keep thinking his eyebrows are sparkling ✨
Edit: "I'm a top," said by a man with whole hand and arm up his ass
😂 Stop /j
The "I'm definitely a top"... Awhat did he say???
To be fair, he is delivering the pleasure of fun historical stories, that's a top move!
I feel like its relevant to mention the incest rumors were started by Lucreiza's first husband, who, after a literal TRIAL where the whole Borgia family publicly alleged he was impotent, alleged that Lucrezia was having an affair with both her father and brother. It was most likely not true, there's never been any evidence to back up the rumors, but it was fueled by the fact that during the trial in which they claimed Lucrezia was a virgin, she was apparently pregnant from an affair with a servant in her husbands household. They kept her out of sight while testifying and after the trial she was sent to a convent for a little under a year, and a while after that a child was added into her fathers household. There's also never been proof that the mystery child was hers, as they always claimed he was the Pope's son, but the boys mother was never identified. If anyone is interested, the tv show "the Borgias" on showtime is very well done, and Lucrezia's life is as fascinating as her brothers imo.
I don't know if anyone else is keeping score, but I am, and this is actually the first episode of the season that Ryan didn't win! (Points-wise.) He tied with Steven, and got more points than Joyce, Ricky, and Kwesi. Zach did kick his ass though, sorry Ryan.
That's good to know, I thank you for your service!! Keep up the good work friend 🫡🫡
I wonder if any teachers have put on this show for their classes only for the puppet host to talk extensively about horse sex
Yes I have 😂 Although I try to skip over that stuff lol
I have. Thankfully not too wild with the donner party episode
I would like to show it but the profanity and sex jokes would get me in trouble.
@@ghintz2156 this is why high school is the best
@@ghintz2156editing existing…
It's amazing that Shane can weave an amazing side story into the ads, WHATS UP WITH DORTHY RUTH!!??
I fully watch ads now because I need to know the Dorothy Ruth lore
Wait wait wait there's a story in the ads? Aawww damnit now I gotta watch 'em lol
Oh yes the Ads are the new hot dogga
Omg all the women are disappearing from puppet history
Shane? Shane isn't in puppet history
I *adore* that the Professor had to bring out the hat in his mouth. It makes me feel like we've been missing a goldmine of imagery this entire series
The semi-subtle shade they throw at Ned Fulmer at 13:01 is hilarious
Can’t wait to see our fuzzy little Professor be a force of chaos yet again in yet another exciting episode of puppet history
Ashley warnadude in the wild on a non TS video? A rare sighting lmao
@@CrowsNest05 puppet history is my beloved
If Puppet History was history teacher in schools, people would more willingly attend them
Fr
Conservative parents would lose their minds.
And they would learn almost no actual history 😂
Honestly, scattering multiple choice questions throughout each topic lecture would also help students learn pattern recognition for social studies. The better they get at guessing what happened next (in the past), the better they recognize what might happen next (in the present).
tell the schools to give teachers a raise. Look at all the equipment they're using along with the many different forms of media they use. And they also get multiple big name sponsors. They're production budget is big. If teachers had the same budget, I'm sure classes would be just as fun. years ago my school was one of the first in my state to get those electronic smart boards and my history teacher did something similar to as the show but at a much smaller scale obviously, they just used kahoot lol
The Professor referring to Machiavelli as "Big Mac" is maybe my the best thing that I've heard this month 😭
Love the episode (as per usual). Did not expect Ryan and Zach to be flirting so aggressively the whole time
puppet history 🔛🔝
What
@@beecake6656are you dumb the meaning of this philosophical comment is so incredulously clear unbelievable
8:46
Puppet History might singlehandedly be the most unhinged yet educational show I have ever had the fortune of consuming.
Zach committing to the professor's tiny hat for the entire episode is hysterical! His look giving a lot of Fear and Loathing in Los Vagas vibes.
also love the Michael Scott quote!
The first time I saw Puppet History and the Professor announced there was going to be a musical number, I remember physically cringing a little because I was 100% sure it would be weird and awkward. I didn’t know it was humanly possible to be that wrong! The songs are ALL certified bops, but this one is RIDICULOUSLY good, like it had no right to go so hard but I’m so glad it did. 😂
Ah, the Borgias, one of history's most infamous families. I'm glad we're delving more into them, especially when we covered the dad briefly on Ruining History so many years ago. I know the Borgias be nasty, at least according to rumor. Also, ah, the base for most paintings of adult Jesus.
was that the episode with all the bad popes? i thought it felt familiar
@@siobhan-rae Yes, it was!
thanks! A rewatch is in order. Forgot about it
I mean the basis of adult Jesus in artwork thing is supposedly not true so take it with a grain of salt.
Zach's exhaustion towards Wife Guy ish is everything and I'm here for it ❤✨️✨️
The lil Pope hat with his skull, maggots and gold tooth, looks like something you’d see in the background of an adventure time episode. I love it 💕
Honestly this video just surprised me with how much Assassins Creed actually wasn’t lying about in regards to the Borgias
That’s why they used to be something special. When they stopped having history blurbs it was such a bummer.
I love it when I get a question right that Ryan gets wrong, it’s soothing.
Although Columbus DID sail in 1492, so there were 2 answers to that question
But did it happen TO Cesare?
I love how well Zach did this time- especially since he didn’t get a single question right last time
just a note! there is a korean novel and manhwa based on lucrezia borgia called "how to win my husband over". it can be quite depressing due to the nature of her family, but i found it a really interesting read.
I was looking for this comment!! My hearts goes out to Ruby and everything her family puts her through!!❤️❤️
Although maybe there isn’t as much information, it would have been nice to hear more about Lucrezia. She was pretty much of a pawn, but she had a life after the death of her father, and had a bunch of children.
You might like reading How To Win My Husband Over. It is a Korean web novel that was adapted into web comics which main character, Rudbeckia, is heavily inspired by Lucrezia, and her family by the Borgias.
The Professor admitting he’s a top was surprising with the Shane’s whole arm up his puppet hole each episode. Lol
16:50 they did have grenades back then. Clay or iron balls filled with gunpowder lit by a slow fuse. Grenados became much more common in the 16th century, but they had made their way to European seige warfare by the 1490s.
Oh god, Ryan's history facts are wrong again!
I was thinking the Holy Hand Grenade but that’s neat!
Thank you! I came here to find this comment, and you delivered.
"I want people to fear how much they love me." - Micheal Scott - Zach Kornfeld
“We’re not doing wife guy shit” DEAD 💀
24:50 worth noting that Machiavelli was also writing in exile, having worked for the Florentine republic and tortured by the Medici family for doing so, with "The Prince" serving as a job resume as much as a poli-sci treatise. If you read his "Discourses on Livy" you'll see that this guy loved republics, but recognized that a dictator (think less Mussolini and more Cincinnatus) would probably be the only way to unite Italy with a standing, Italian-born army rather than foreign mercenaries. the dude wanted what we would recognize as a "modern" nation-state, but ironically is remembered as a mustache-twirling caricature of himself because he was working to maneuver his way back to his home.
still not a totally great guy, but not nearly as cartoonishly callous as folks tend to portray him. That being said i appreciate the Professor's candid nuance about big Mach.
Aha, the Borgias. I love their little slice of history, they show how much politics played a part in the Catholic Church a long time ago
Anyone saying politics isn’t involved in something especially religion doesn’t know the concept or definition of politics.
You would have to isolate yourself on an island without another person to avoid politics. Even tribes have politics.
You mean how politics plays a part in the Church since long time ago. Not much changed since the Borgias
I love the Pope Hat puppet! The skull being the lower half of his head is so funny and creative!
Zach just gets the vibe of this show
Goddamn Ryan made my dog freak out barking with his seal barks 😭😭😭😂
Same! My dog was so mad at my iPad, omg.
They're communicating! It's like the twilight bark!
Love that in the absence of lore so far with the Professor or Ryan, we have been blessed with the lore of Dorothy Ruth and her marriage. =)
Edit: Her husband-to-be seems to be not the greatest though, why would he disrespect her dead husband? >=(
He's totally the Substitute
@@gracefullyinthegrave1964I'm not sure he is, the hologram box was thrown out with the algorithm machine and therefore is no longer connected to the stage. I don't doubt that the substitute will return, but I don't think it'll be through the ads
“the guy DMing god at the time was…” as a description for the pope is so funny i cannot w/ Shane
Lmfao ryan going from hating CDawgs to being the loudest in the room when it occurs has got to be the greatest character development in Human History
my professor plush just came in a few minutes before this episode dropped. i love him so much, thank you ryan and shane for keeping my brain occupied
Mine came earlier this week and I freakin love it!!! He makes me happy just looking at him!
It's still so strange seeing professor HATLESS he's head naked
That SONG??? I'm living
"Popes?" "Yeah we talk to you all the time!" "Cool, never heard of ya "
Lore I didn't expect: The Professor confirming he is "definitely a top"
the way i’ve been yelling NICCOLO MACHIAVELLI at my screen as they try and figure out who The Italian Writer is
I wasn't yelling, bur same. I haven't read it, but knew that one
Ah yes finally, a video about one of my favorite Assassin's Creed villains ❤
*(Just Whistling Ezio's Family)*
so fun watching this video and being like oh yeah I killed that guy, oh and that guy
Was looking for this comment!
Cesare, oh Cesare
A man of great depravity
Believed himself immortal
Til he had a date with gravity
the lack of assassins creed comments made me disappointed; like no one is gonna mention the apple of eden? ezio? 🤨
THE HAT IS BACK. I love that zach put it back on the professor. He's just not the same without it. Also haha ned joke, loved that.
It’s worth remembering that for all the fantastical elements of the story, most characters in Assassins Creed were actual people!
This might be one of my favourites ever - Catholic church drama, wife guy jokes, Sims references? Yes please
I'm getting weirdly invested in this Horse Drama. Heck, it's like a barnyard soap opera! Dorothy, what in the world are you getting up to...
Her first gut was safe and dependable. After an ordeal like his loss it's normal to need the thrill of the new guy.
the absolute peace i felt when zach placed the hat back on the professor,,,please bring it back
awesome to see the real life history of the main antagonists from assassins creed 2 and brotherhood! love this show!
I'm so happy I wasn't the only one thinking this XD This was such a good ep
Very happy to hear his mom is in college now. Hope she enjoys it.
Good luck with student loans!
"were not doing wife guy shit" "why zach"
gold
It’s always a good day when the Try Guys and the Ghoul Boys do collabs :D
Zach wore that hat so well that I forgot it was a PUPPET'S HAT the whole time.
‘we’re not doing wife guy shit’
‘why Zach’ LMAO STOP
I feel like by marriage #3, no matter how pretty Lucrezia was, the deaths of her former husbands would have given him just a bit of pause.
She didn't live much longer herself, dying in childbirth in her 20's
only one really died. Basically if they offer you an out, take it
“We’re not doing wife guy shit”
“Why is that?” 💀💀
This era of Watcher x Try Guys is my favourite - keep it coming!
P.S: Keith would really love Puppet History, just sayin' ;)
Keith's been in an episode; and you're right, he seemed to really enjoy it
in case anyone is wondering, the Keith episode of Puppet History is the Isaac Newton episode!
“Tickle him Zach, tickle him…with the feather Zach”
😂😂😂😂😂😂
I saw Borgia flash up on the title card and immediately refilled my drink knowing this would be wild
8:22 this bit killed me 😭 Ryan always just says the most unhinged shit and then we all move on
Fun Fact: Cesare was used as the model for Jesus in a shit ton of art commissioned by the Church. That's why he might look kinda familiar. And also why we remember Jesus as a brownish red haired white dude...even though he was Arabic.
You know that whole joke about popes and weapons and how the final song was sung by the pope hat?
Fun fact: in italian the pope hat is called "mitra" which, by coincidence, is also the word for machine gun.
lmao i love the professor opening the lesson with one of Machiavelli’s most famous quotes and they were still like, yeah no clue who this writer is, marco, mario
Puppet History should cover Rasputin cause he was a fascinatingly creepy guy.
If I had a nickel for every song I've heard about the Borgia family, I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice.
(Horrible Histories fans for the win)
"We're not doing wife guy shit"
"Why Zach?"
I fucking spit out my drink lmaooooo
God me too.
I thought Cesare and Lucretzia sounded familiar. They're from the Ruining History episode of nasty popes.
Zach making the chestnut party reference too!
Okay, last episode had me worried about Dorothy Ruth, but now I'm even more worried after that exchange with Elmer Walter Williams.
All the ladies are disappearing! Dorothy Ruth, Dino mom!
Finally. All my years of playing Assassin's Creed have prepared me for this.
Zach saying safari yarmulke makes me wonder why we don’t have other hats like it. Imagine a spindle yarmulke or a top hat yarmulke.
I swear if history class was anything like this I would learn so much more
You know, people always say this, and MY history class involved re-enactments and jelly beans, and we still didn't talk about obscure papal conflicts. Sometimes there's just too much history for one class, I guess.
I don't think you would
professor: sims fuckrooms
me: wicked whims?????
"The guy DMing God" at the time might be the funniest thing I've ever heard
ah yes, the ultimate serotonin provider, a slightly insane little blue guy
me hearing Cesare Borgia got me remembering the good old days of assassins creed brotherhood
"is that sme yt ppl shi ? " " oh VERY white" LMAFAOOOOOO
We started with the Hot Daga and now we have the Pope’s Hat and god singing harmony! Shane’s silliness is the gift that keeps giving!
Could the Pope hat belong to Space-Pope Chili IX?
@@autumnsfablekeeper4419 if it didn’t before, it sure does now! That explains the maggots :)
I feel I have heard this story in Shane’s voice sometime before now, hmmmmm. I hope history doesn’t get ruined!
Lucrezia, Giovanni,
Gioffre and Cesare
Italian barmy army,
The Borgia Family
Our daddy was Rodrigo
I had a monstrous ego
Where he makes trouble we go
The Borgia Family
To the tine of "Addams Family"?
@@LindaC616 *click click*
Our tale begins Renaissance Spain,
Its leaders were a shower
And I ran out of patience
So began in my quest for power
I splashed my cash to all the papal cardinals in hope
That they’d be bought,
They were in short
And I became the Pope
More power than I oughta
Blood’s thicker than water
Appoint my sons and daughter
To run a dynasty
(Yes! Horrible Histories Parody)
ryan has been weirdly into it this season