Don't fight Kangaroos. This man was incredibly lucky. A roo will balance on it's tail and kick at you, the potential that you will be disemboweled is high and even if that doesn't happen, you'll probably have internal bleeding and damaged organs. Roos are absolute units but are mostly not aggressive. Once had a big red go inside my tent and start eating a book I had in there. I coaxed the roo out of the tent and took the book out of it's mouth and it indifferently just wandered off. I still have that chewed on book somewhere.
Yeah that roo wasn't hugging that dog, it was choking it. When Kangaroos fight each other they will often go for choke holds on each other and will actually choke each other unconscious. They have also been known to drown dogs.
As Simon said, he took the roo by surprise. But that being said it was a smaller one, and not a Big Red which are the muscle boys. They can kill a man without thinking twice about it.
If there is 1 human I trust in the whole world to take on a kangaroo in a fight unarmed it would be Andrew Ucles He is also probably the 2% who would answer yes to all those questions
@@OrangeDog20 Was it not "The Next Episode?" Now I can't find where in the video the was imitating the song to compare, but I thought it was that iconic beat.
@@idiotstupid5904 those are a good shout, but he really shines when you put him in the same room as lewis, Tom or harry. Chilluminati vods or angory tom backlog is a good place to watch.
He seems to have a cult following, he is a very specific type of weird that some people find off-putting (my gf thinks he is strange). His best ability is; he can make Lewis laugh he ass off.
i agree :) i just use youtube, so whatever other source someone wants to bother me with - they dont get it:) i miss him on youtube.. but hey :) snippets will do fine
6:30 Lewis is remembering a moment in "Gargantua", the second book of a pentalogy by French Renaissance writer Francois Rabelais, where the titular character, Gargantua, recalls that best thing he ever wiped his ass with was the neck of a goose. It's either he's surprisingly well-versed in 16th-century French literature, or it was a question on QI.
fun fact: the animal avengers do exist in the comics, they're called the "Pet Avengers". the frog version of thor did actually appear in loki for a few seconds
I have no idea how anyone can watch these videos in podcast form! Part of the comedic beauty of Lewis and Simon is the perfectly timed visual comedy they have together! Pure gold…
"They go through [a fridge full of antidotes] and they've got tarantula, and python, and red viper, and all the other things I don't know." - Lewis 2021 A nonvenomous spider, a nonvenomous snake, and a snake no longer recognized as a separate taxon (some British adders and American copperheads have been misidentified as red vipers, both are venomous though the adder's venom is readily survivable).
Tarantulas are very much venomous, sure their venom is never fatal, but they still have venom that is easily capable of killing their desired prey and causing excruciating pain to humans
@@whoburntmytoast8322 Hardly excruciating. It's about as bad as a bee or wasp sting, actually. Yeah, it hurts, and yes, they are venomous, but they don't pose any real threat of pain or injury to humans.
@@mentaya11 it depends on the species. A 'beginner' species, like a Pink Toe or Curly Hair sure, but a Cobalt Blue or OBT's bite is meant to hurt like hell. Though saying all this I've never been bitten by one myself so I can't say for sure lol
@@whoburntmytoast8322 I suppose that is fair. Tarantulas are a reasonably broad classification. But most people I know of think of a very specific species when they think of them. The most commonly considered species (in my experience), are all pretty safe. Now, I've never been bitten by any either, just going on hearsay and fellow scientists' word for it. (I am an environmental scientist, by degree, who also minored in both biology and communication, though that has fairly little relevance to this particular conversation)
29:35 I feel like against the elephant the number of unarmed people it takes just means "How many humans can fit in an elephants mouth before it chokes to death"
Except elephants are herbivores. They won't eat you or put you in their mouth. Unless you are overpowering it and stuffing yourself in it's throat that won't do you any good.
I'd say to kill the elephant unarmed you'd have to go primal and somehow lure the elephant into a charge off a cliff or some other drop where it would fall and die
Even then elephants arent the dumbest animal, but then again there's alot of vague stuff with this quizz like the king cobra one will you win if you kill it first and then you die or do you have to actually survive etc 😂
Just go for the ears. Elephants have a lot of blood pumping through their ears. I would bet a human could tear an ear, and cause it to bleed to death. I could take an elephant.
Holy shit this one had me laughing uncontrollably. That fucking chat about Honkers and gaining its powers. Oh god I haven't laughed like this in years.
6:30 I'm pretty sure Lewis is thinking of a part of a book called Gargantua and Pantagruel where one of the characters comes to the conclusion about swan necks being the best to wipe ones anus with
i love how they say "they should've shown people this video before doing the poll" and the image of the man punching the 'roo is right there. Also making Bates laugh is definitely a wonderful part of this series.
I think with snakes the trick would be to keep their head held down. Good luck with that of course cause theyre fairly strong iirc As for kangaroo boxing, if it was just a fist fight you could probably take one. Problem is the first time you hit them too hard theyre gonna drop back on their tail and kick you to the moon
Snakes aren't that hard to hold down, especially one the size of a cobra. The problem would be actually getting hold of one because venomous snakes are very quick and twitchy. Even harder if you don't want to get poisoned in the process. The large and strong snakes are (almost?) always constrictors, who aren't that dangerous to humans and are a lot more sluggish.
Certain species of venomous snakes with especially long fangs are known to bite THROUGH their own bottom jaw to reach fingers holding them behind the head (a position that is considered "safe" otherwise...)
@@Scillamar "especially one the size of a cobra? A king cobra can reach sizes over 18 feet long. What size do you think *would* be hard to hold down? Sure, they aren't a constrictor, but they are plenty strong. Besides, snake strikes are so fast, you don't have any chance to close with them anyways. It's pretty nearly 100% if you and the cobra are both stuck together and trying to kill each other that you'll get bitten. If you surprise one and have the tools to catch a snake, or know what you are doing, there are tricks, but if the snake is as determined to kill you as you are it, you simply aren't going to get close. At that point you're on a 30 minute clock to your death. Less than that for shock and unconsciousness. Now, I'll grant that constrictors can get larger, and be stronger, like a 20-30 foot anaconda, but those absolutely *are* dangerous to humans, and anything else they decide to eat. They can eat a grown man, or even a grown cow whole. Though, admittedly, we have a lot fewer human deaths by constrictors compared to cobras and other venomous snakes.
An interesting and fun fact: In some countries, such as Mongolia, golden eagles are/were used by humans to hunt wolves as a means of protecting their herds of sheep or goats. Eagles are fucking tough.
The chimp 911 call simon was refering too was the Travis the chimp attack. Truly a brutal story. The chimp did indeed eat the owner's friends face and also bit her hands off. It continued to attack even as the owner stabbed it with a kitchen knife and hit it with a shovel over the head. The chimp was shot 9-10 times point blank by the responding officer when it attacked his car as he pulled up. Travis survived this and only died once he got back into his bed area. The chimp was thought to have not recognosed the friend as she had changed her hair style causing Travis to see her as a threat.
The thing is, with most animals that are roughly your size or smaller, as long as you can get them into grappling you've won, though you'll definitely have to trade some damage.
The kangaroo was trying to break the dogs neck. Apparently that’s common for Roos to do that. But the Roos feet will spill your entrails quick and easy.
21:39 Yeh honestly about the best you can do against a crocodile unarmed is restrain it and take its eyes out but there's not really any likely way you're actually going to be able to kill it. Unless you go for a real wild card and try to punch one of its teeth out and then use that as a dagger against it.
yeah, right. You're not knocking out it's tooth, and you wouldn't get through it's hide with it. And even 'restraining' it would be impossible for most people, Crocodile Hunter would be the type of exception. Even he just held the mouth shut, wrapped it in something, and let someone haul it in a boat. Crocs can sprint at 20 mph, they have one of the strongest bite forces in nature, their claws can disembowel you and their tails are muscle more than a foot thick that can shatter your legs easily. Their skin is tough enough that you really aren't going to have any way to get through it, not unarmed. Eyes are your best bet, probably, but good luck even doing that much. I don't think a person is alive you could kill one unarmed.
This episode gave me some truly classic YogPod vibes! Thank you Lewis & Simon! You guys have been entertaining me since 2009. I cry laughed at everything to do with Underdog. Especially regarding why he's so lovable and then learning about the fight that he always wins. 🐶
I think the 10% of people that think they could beat a chimp in a fight should really really make an effort to go fight a chimp. Preferably somewhere isolated, and away from possible onlooking children.
I don't like my odds, not gonna lie, but I think there is a small chance. Better than some of the things lower on this list. Still, if I were taking the poll, I'd check 'no' to the chimp.
Lewis Brindley once said that a cockroach got into his kitchen once so he moved out, I do not think he can take a rat even though I would root for him.
I love that there are people stupid enough to think they could take on a gorilla. The strongest man on earth can bench press 401kg. An average silverback can bench 1.8 tonnes. Every part of them can crush a human with very little effort. Crocodiles also would be impossible to kill for an unarmed human.
gorillas have a number of weaknesses which completely negate the threat they pose. for instance, if you *die immediately* they are entirely incapable of killing you
Guy's if you don't go to the hospital with the king cobra antivenom with you, the hospital won't have any to give. Also, you need to bring enough, one guy went through like 30 vials of antivenom from a bite.
Not even 3 minutes in and I’m already dead. “Bizzly Gear” LOL SIMONNNN The tangents these guys go on is one of the best things about this. Hahahahah! I’m with Simon… Whales would kill everything! LOL
Every day when you're walkin' down the street everybody that you meet 2 out of every 100 of them has said that they could handle fighting a grizzly bear on their own, unarmed ...and I say HEY!
That dude fighting the kangaroo didn't just casually punch the kangaroo, he went full on legit fighting pose and was ready to throw down. I respect the shit out of that.
27:17 "Maybe [Americans] don't understand what 'unarmed' means." I mean, you're probably not wrong. Half of them lose their shit if you suggest they don't really need to have 18 hunting rifles, 13 shotguns, 25 pistols and 5 fully-automatic machine guns within arm's reach at all times - I wouldn't be surprised if the idea of not having a gun on them is so foreign and incomprehensible that the concept of "unarmed" just doesn't exist in their minds. Talking about fighting animals unarmed would be like that scene from the Simpsons where they visit Australia and Marge struggles to order a coffee. "I'd like a coffee, please." >"One beer, coming off." "No, a COFFEE." >"...yeah, a beer." "C... O..." >"B... E..."
I love how Lewis has to say something cursed almost every episode and Simon's just sat there, scared for his life
I like want to click away and stop listening, but I am in wayyy too much suspense about what Lewis will say next!! 😂😂
That’s just how Lewis is all the time every day
@@tylerrogers7639
"How many men do you think it would take to defeat the wind? UNARMED?" This got me so hard. And the little caveat at the end too.
That's a very specific fetish you've discovered there
@@Trick.Sparrow oh no, words got me again
As many as it would take to ring the earth to whichever bit of the atmosphere stops having wind in it!
The Romans wared the ocean. They claimed spoils of war, but I see allot of ocean around and no Romans.
Don't fight Kangaroos. This man was incredibly lucky. A roo will balance on it's tail and kick at you, the potential that you will be disemboweled is high and even if that doesn't happen, you'll probably have internal bleeding and damaged organs. Roos are absolute units but are mostly not aggressive. Once had a big red go inside my tent and start eating a book I had in there. I coaxed the roo out of the tent and took the book out of it's mouth and it indifferently just wandered off. I still have that chewed on book somewhere.
This was a ride to read
Yeah that roo wasn't hugging that dog, it was choking it. When Kangaroos fight each other they will often go for choke holds on each other and will actually choke each other unconscious. They have also been known to drown dogs.
As Simon said, he took the roo by surprise. But that being said it was a smaller one, and not a Big Red which are the muscle boys. They can kill a man without thinking twice about it.
If there is 1 human I trust in the whole world to take on a kangaroo in a fight unarmed it would be Andrew Ucles
He is also probably the 2% who would answer yes to all those questions
Thank goodness I read this comment, for I was going to go fight a kangaroo.
THE NUMBERS DON'T LIE. AND THEY SPELL DISASTER FOR MANKIND AT SACRIFICE.
Oh man, what a classic
I think Simon's rendition of the Snoop Dog tune was spot on
What song was it?
@@Delalcon D. O. Double G
I thought it was that russian silver body suit guy song
@@OrangeDog20 Was it not "The Next Episode?" Now I can't find where in the video the was imitating the song to compare, but I thought it was that iconic beat.
@@MeAuntieNora Very beginning. also technically it's a Dre song too I think :p
Yes, Americans understand "unarmed." That's when you've only got a small caliber pistol.
Average American: “Gun not arm. Arm is arm. Word people stupid. Why not smrt like me?”
@@christopherconnel6909 American here, can confirm. The right to bear arms against armed bears and all that.
> Thread making fun of America
> "Wait, how many of you are American?"
> Everyone raises hand
As long as it's smaller than a 9mm it's unarmed 😆
Don't forget the important Florida tradition of adulthood is killing both a crocodile and alligator while unarmed with a .22 caliber uzi
"This is what happens when you are both bottoms" - never related to a situation more - ded.
One of my new favourite Lewis and Simon moments haha
13:30
A shame Simon is on so rarely nowadays. He's such a funny guy.
maybe watch his twitch channel, or the youtube channel that has his vods...
@@idiotstupid5904 those are a good shout, but he really shines when you put him in the same room as lewis, Tom or harry. Chilluminati vods or angory tom backlog is a good place to watch.
He seems to have a cult following, he is a very specific type of weird that some people find off-putting (my gf thinks he is strange). His best ability is; he can make Lewis laugh he ass off.
i agree :) i just use youtube, so whatever other source someone wants to bother me with - they dont get it:) i miss him on youtube.. but hey :) snippets will do fine
@@cypherdras I think it's in the stunted comedic timing for me and the manic swings form cackling to am I serious? I can see how it not for everyone.
6:30 Lewis is remembering a moment in "Gargantua", the second book of a pentalogy by French Renaissance writer Francois Rabelais, where the titular character, Gargantua, recalls that best thing he ever wiped his ass with was the neck of a goose. It's either he's surprisingly well-versed in 16th-century French literature, or it was a question on QI.
Definitely qi
Keep it up with Simon’s Peculiar Portions! Absolutely love you two whether you’re playing games or just talking stories!
Yes, I just love Simon's PP
Big YogPod vibes.
fun fact: the animal avengers do exist in the comics, they're called the "Pet Avengers". the frog version of thor did actually appear in loki for a few seconds
Simon’s bottom line broke me
same
Simon's "bottom line" was my bottom-line.
@Nevieth 13:37
Getting my weekly fix of the power bottoms of the Yogscast.
In Russia we call chinese burn "nettle", cause it kinda feels like a burn left by this plant
Makes sense to me - Makes more sense than the other names :)
Belgium we call it a ''Twister'' lel, I do like ''nettle'' alot!
German word is "Brennnessel" which is also the translation of nettle
In The Netherlands we call it 'barbed wire' (atleast where I'm from we did lmao)
In the U.S. we call it Indian burn/Indian rug burn/Indian sun burn (in reference to the Native Americans)
“I think I could take a grizzly bear”
“In a fight right?”
“;)”
“- in a fight right..?”
"This is what happens when you're in a relationship and you're both bottoms." SIMON, I NEVER SEE YOU ANYMORE BUT YOU"RE STILL GOLDEN
That is a small variant of Kangaroo too, common eastern grey. The big reds will fuck you up.
The " You look like a Clingon that´s been in a car accident" actually made spit my tea!
"Smoothly the same" literally made me fall out of my chair
I have no idea how anyone can watch these videos in podcast form! Part of the comedic beauty of Lewis and Simon is the perfectly timed visual comedy they have together! Pure gold…
Plus this video saved me from having to google echidna danguses!
20 humans versus elephant: "We'll lure it over here and then shove Tony down it's throat and it chokes to death." "Yeah... Hey!"
Let’s go boys are back, and funnier than ever.
Funny looking
47:43 "Sorry, I'm thinking of kangaroos again" Said like that, is one of the funniest things I've ever heard.
“This is what happens in a relationship where you’re both bottoms”
…
Mood
"They go through [a fridge full of antidotes] and they've got tarantula, and python, and red viper, and all the other things I don't know." - Lewis 2021
A nonvenomous spider, a nonvenomous snake, and a snake no longer recognized as a separate taxon (some British adders and American copperheads have been misidentified as red vipers, both are venomous though the adder's venom is readily survivable).
Tarantulas are very much venomous, sure their venom is never fatal, but they still have venom that is easily capable of killing their desired prey and causing excruciating pain to humans
@@whoburntmytoast8322 "excruciating pain"
that'll get you an opiate prescription, not tarantula antivenom
@@whoburntmytoast8322 Hardly excruciating. It's about as bad as a bee or wasp sting, actually. Yeah, it hurts, and yes, they are venomous, but they don't pose any real threat of pain or injury to humans.
@@mentaya11 it depends on the species. A 'beginner' species, like a Pink Toe or Curly Hair sure, but a Cobalt Blue or OBT's bite is meant to hurt like hell. Though saying all this I've never been bitten by one myself so I can't say for sure lol
@@whoburntmytoast8322 I suppose that is fair. Tarantulas are a reasonably broad classification. But most people I know of think of a very specific species when they think of them. The most commonly considered species (in my experience), are all pretty safe. Now, I've never been bitten by any either, just going on hearsay and fellow scientists' word for it. (I am an environmental scientist, by degree, who also minored in both biology and communication, though that has fairly little relevance to this particular conversation)
This is my favourite pub conversation.
13:31 the bottom joke wore me down so much i bursted out laughing in the commute thinking about it
wait until they find out the animal avengers are a thing. they are called Lockjaw and the Pet Avengers
29:35
I feel like against the elephant the number of unarmed people it takes just means "How many humans can fit in an elephants mouth before it chokes to death"
Except elephants are herbivores. They won't eat you or put you in their mouth. Unless you are overpowering it and stuffing yourself in it's throat that won't do you any good.
I cannot rightly put into words how happy my entire being is while watching these. Simon is a treasure and I love him.
Almost died when Lewis was like "How do you snap a snake" with the best confused expression.
Almost a hour of Simon and Lewis talking shit. This is perfection.
Hardest animal to take in a fight would be Mandrew due to the ferocious army that precedes
Mandrew was super dog it's true!
Also because he's a Superdog. It's true, you can tell from the bright green glowing poo
53:42 made me think of Simon and Sips’ ”smack-talk”
"Your body is an instrument.
_...and i'd play it all night"_
I'd say to kill the elephant unarmed you'd have to go primal and somehow lure the elephant into a charge off a cliff or some other drop where it would fall and die
Even then elephants arent the dumbest animal, but then again there's alot of vague stuff with this quizz like the king cobra one will you win if you kill it first and then you die or do you have to actually survive etc 😂
Yes, the plains of Africa are known for there steep cliffs
Elephants are intelligent enough to avoid cliffs and other hazards
Just go for the ears. Elephants have a lot of blood pumping through their ears. I would bet a human could tear an ear, and cause it to bleed to death.
I could take an elephant.
@@bigdonny6664 yes there are cliffs, how do you think they filmed the lion king?
Holy shit this one had me laughing uncontrollably. That fucking chat about Honkers and gaining its powers. Oh god I haven't laughed like this in years.
6:30 I'm pretty sure Lewis is thinking of a part of a book called Gargantua and Pantagruel where one of the characters comes to the conclusion about swan necks being the best to wipe ones anus with
It was also a question on QI
Such a shame how little views this had since this is pure Yogscast GOLD
I mostly listen to this on my podcast app, just came back to see some of the weird things they described, like the goose.
i love how they say "they should've shown people this video before doing the poll" and the image of the man punching the 'roo is right there.
Also making Bates laugh is definitely a wonderful part of this series.
A full hour on video?! You guys are spoiling us 🤗🤗
I think with snakes the trick would be to keep their head held down. Good luck with that of course cause theyre fairly strong iirc
As for kangaroo boxing, if it was just a fist fight you could probably take one. Problem is the first time you hit them too hard theyre gonna drop back on their tail and kick you to the moon
Snakes aren't that hard to hold down, especially one the size of a cobra. The problem would be actually getting hold of one because venomous snakes are very quick and twitchy. Even harder if you don't want to get poisoned in the process. The large and strong snakes are (almost?) always constrictors, who aren't that dangerous to humans and are a lot more sluggish.
Certain species of venomous snakes with especially long fangs are known to bite THROUGH their own bottom jaw to reach fingers holding them behind the head (a position that is considered "safe" otherwise...)
@@Scillamar "especially one the size of a cobra? A king cobra can reach sizes over 18 feet long. What size do you think *would* be hard to hold down? Sure, they aren't a constrictor, but they are plenty strong. Besides, snake strikes are so fast, you don't have any chance to close with them anyways. It's pretty nearly 100% if you and the cobra are both stuck together and trying to kill each other that you'll get bitten. If you surprise one and have the tools to catch a snake, or know what you are doing, there are tricks, but if the snake is as determined to kill you as you are it, you simply aren't going to get close. At that point you're on a 30 minute clock to your death. Less than that for shock and unconsciousness. Now, I'll grant that constrictors can get larger, and be stronger, like a 20-30 foot anaconda, but those absolutely *are* dangerous to humans, and anything else they decide to eat. They can eat a grown man, or even a grown cow whole. Though, admittedly, we have a lot fewer human deaths by constrictors compared to cobras and other venomous snakes.
Underdog does actually exist as a movie about a roughly medium sized dog with superpowers. xD
Edit: and apparently a cartoon lol
I need more Simon n Lewis, no matter what they are doing
The Animal Avengers exists! Lockjaw and the Pet Avengers. It was a great little side comic. Featuring Throg, or Frog-Thor.
And of course Honkers and Underdog
Is Tony Stork in there as well?
@@benjackson8731 He's a mouse
*KGB agent books flight to Bristol*
in russian accent- "They know too much!"
"This is what happens in a relationship when you're both bottoms"
BRILLIANT. That made me laugh until I got stomach cramps 🤣
Well this was a pleasurable pleasantly puzzlingly pernickety plus particularly peculiar peculiar portions, post viewing.
An interesting and fun fact: In some countries, such as Mongolia, golden eagles are/were used by humans to hunt wolves as a means of protecting their herds of sheep or goats. Eagles are fucking tough.
Amen to that. Of course, Goldens are among the toughest of their breed.
Content with Simon and Lewis together always makes my day brighter
The chimp 911 call simon was refering too was the Travis the chimp attack.
Truly a brutal story. The chimp did indeed eat the owner's friends face and also bit her hands off. It continued to attack even as the owner stabbed it with a kitchen knife and hit it with a shovel over the head.
The chimp was shot 9-10 times point blank by the responding officer when it attacked his car as he pulled up. Travis survived this and only died once he got back into his bed area.
The chimp was thought to have not recognosed the friend as she had changed her hair style causing Travis to see her as a threat.
The thing is, with most animals that are roughly your size or smaller, as long as you can get them into grappling you've won, though you'll definitely have to trade some damage.
The kangaroo was trying to break the dogs neck. Apparently that’s common for Roos to do that. But the Roos feet will spill your entrails quick and easy.
"This is what happens in a relationship when you're both bottoms!" Omg Simon 😂😂
21:39
Yeh honestly about the best you can do against a crocodile unarmed is restrain it and take its eyes out but there's not really any likely way you're actually going to be able to kill it.
Unless you go for a real wild card and try to punch one of its teeth out and then use that as a dagger against it.
yeah, right. You're not knocking out it's tooth, and you wouldn't get through it's hide with it. And even 'restraining' it would be impossible for most people, Crocodile Hunter would be the type of exception. Even he just held the mouth shut, wrapped it in something, and let someone haul it in a boat. Crocs can sprint at 20 mph, they have one of the strongest bite forces in nature, their claws can disembowel you and their tails are muscle more than a foot thick that can shatter your legs easily. Their skin is tough enough that you really aren't going to have any way to get through it, not unarmed. Eyes are your best bet, probably, but good luck even doing that much. I don't think a person is alive you could kill one unarmed.
There relationship is so bizzarre, and genuinely awkward yet charming just like underdog.
I love how Simon referenced Hell in a cell Pay per view from wwe
The match took place at the King of the Ring PPV in 1998
This episode gave me some truly classic YogPod vibes! Thank you Lewis & Simon! You guys have been entertaining me since 2009.
I cry laughed at everything to do with Underdog. Especially regarding why he's so lovable and then learning about the fight that he always wins. 🐶
Simon as a dog: Revenge is a dish best served cold, but my dinner sure ain't.
This man is secretly a comedic genius.
All I need is simon and lewis content where they talk about whatever they want. Viva la yogpod
Cosmo the Spacedog is a Marvel psychic dog, he helps out the Guardians of the Galaxy a lot lol he could be the leader of the animal avengers
Sadly the animal avengers are only apes and such. Comics are wack.
You know, I should've waited to read the comments.
You guys don't realise how close you are to an actual Marvel team; The Pet Avengers!
5:26 “if you’re trapped in a rat, and a cell attacks me” -Lewis and simon
I think the 10% of people that think they could beat a chimp in a fight should really really make an effort to go fight a chimp.
Preferably somewhere isolated, and away from possible onlooking children.
I don't like my odds, not gonna lie, but I think there is a small chance. Better than some of the things lower on this list. Still, if I were taking the poll, I'd check 'no' to the chimp.
"Why the fuck are we still bothering with the Olympics when we could have this?"
Simon out here asking the real questions
How does one snap a snake..
This is what happens in a relationship when you're both bottoms
I am absolutely shaking with laughter
I watch both the show and listen to the podcadt, love it, Thank you!
Well Dave you know when you open the bag .. *Dave has been calling 999 since he saw the feathers popping out of the bag* 🤣
im very hungover and this has made my morning so much better
1:10-1:15 Thank you, cameraperson. Your artistic excellence does not go unnoticed.
Thanks for the invite guys, it was a lot of fun! :)
Lewis Brindley once said that a cockroach got into his kitchen once so he moved out, I do not think he can take a rat even though I would root for him.
I think that’s before Lewis went fucking insane though
Modern Lewis would eat that cockroach
Fuck man I live for this. Classic Lewis and Simon content. The relationship of both bottoms comment had me crying laughing.
A sortedfood and yogscast collab would definitely be something I'd love to see!
I find it very amusing that Simons ‘uhm’ is completely in tune with The Avengers theme he sung prior 33:11
Poor Kangaroo was just hugging his new friend, and man just came and rocked his shit.
Cobra's weakness is how slow their strike is. That's why the snake charmers are so confident. It's a well kept secret though, so don't tell anyone.
"you're not allowed a rubber band that counts as being armed" - simon honeydew
Also the kangaroo tried to use it's toe nails to gut the dog as the man approached.
that thing with the arm, we call it barbed wire
Lewis and Simon are always the best together
"A lot of people scared of gooses"
- Lewis Brindley, 2021
I love that there are people stupid enough to think they could take on a gorilla. The strongest man on earth can bench press 401kg. An average silverback can bench 1.8 tonnes. Every part of them can crush a human with very little effort.
Crocodiles also would be impossible to kill for an unarmed human.
And elephants and lions
gorillas have a number of weaknesses which completely negate the threat they pose. for instance, if you *die immediately* they are entirely incapable of killing you
Yeah, the bottom of this list is just "dead...dead...yep, no chance there". Cobra too.
Lewis: "I'm a vegan. I love animals"
Also Lewis: *Spends an hour devising increasingly elaborate ways to defeat various animals in combat*
Here to say hello to the boys. Got this pretty tune.
It was incredibly tuneful though. Really impressive.
8:28 Have you ever tried to punch a bird? Someone get the Pokemon type chart!
Guy's if you don't go to the hospital with the king cobra antivenom with you, the hospital won't have any to give. Also, you need to bring enough, one guy went through like 30 vials of antivenom from a bite.
Guess I'll die
Underdawg and Honkers, excellent
Not even 3 minutes in and I’m already dead.
“Bizzly Gear” LOL SIMONNNN
The tangents these guys go on is one of the best things about this. Hahahahah!
I’m with Simon… Whales would kill everything! LOL
I've never felt more Australian, watching a couple brits watch that legend clock that kangaroo!
I fucking love that Simon at the mention of cloacas just had to mention Knuckles
Every day when you're walkin' down the street
everybody that you meet
2 out of every 100 of them has said that they could handle fighting a grizzly bear on their own, unarmed
...and I say HEY!
I love Simon's peculiarities.
The aninal avengers convo had me laugh so hard my tummy hurts
I love these! Please keep making them!
That dude fighting the kangaroo didn't just casually punch the kangaroo, he went full on legit fighting pose and was ready to throw down. I respect the shit out of that.
In Canada (or at least my school) we called twisting someone's arm like that a snake bite
Same, which is funny, because they were talking about snake bites while talking about fighting cobras
Growing up in Arizona we always called the arm-twisting thing "rattle snake bite"
27:17 "Maybe [Americans] don't understand what 'unarmed' means." I mean, you're probably not wrong. Half of them lose their shit if you suggest they don't really need to have 18 hunting rifles, 13 shotguns, 25 pistols and 5 fully-automatic machine guns within arm's reach at all times - I wouldn't be surprised if the idea of not having a gun on them is so foreign and incomprehensible that the concept of "unarmed" just doesn't exist in their minds.
Talking about fighting animals unarmed would be like that scene from the Simpsons where they visit Australia and Marge struggles to order a coffee.
"I'd like a coffee, please."
>"One beer, coming off."
"No, a COFFEE."
>"...yeah, a beer."
"C... O..."
>"B... E..."
The next video should just be Ravs and Ben carrying on like nothing's different. 😂