DATING SOMEONE WITH A CHILD | Answering FAQ's
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- čas přidán 12. 08. 2020
- I hope you found this video helpful :) Thanks for watching!
Links:
Instagram- / studentdoct. .
Twitter- / futuredoctoral
Facebook Fan Page- / futuredoctoral
My sisters Channel- / sabsbeauty
My sister and I's Vlog Channel- / sabrinasl. .
Camera: Canon Mark II G7x
Editing Software: AVS Video Editor
I've been watching your channel for 7 years, and it's crazy how much you've grown! You and your sister were always "role models" for me, despite being the same age. Super crazy to see how much has changed
This is exactly what I was thinking lol.... And they are still sort of role models for me, and I am like a whole 6 and maybe 4 years older than them.
Same thoughts lol I first saw them back in 2012 that means around 8 years back
I have to say that you all sound like you have a really good situation. I am impressed.
Aww Alex I have watched your videos for years now and it's amazing how much you have grown up I feel like I've grown up along with you and your sister. I am also only 6 years older than you and this might come off weird but I am proud of how awesome and successful you have grown up to be (and always where to begin with lol).. Keep spreading light 💖
Nila Ata Thank you so much! That was so sweet and made my day ❤️ I appreciate how long you’ve stuck with us :)
@@StudentDoctorAlex Ofc! I always loved how authentic you and your sister's videos were and are. It's really refreshing from so many drama induced and overly advertised paid channels out there, not to throw shade at any other CZcamsrs but it's true. 🙈☺️
Really enjoyed watching this!! 💛💛
I know a lot of people are saying this right now, but I've been watching your videos since the summer of 2011 ( I was 12!) and I really feel like I've grown up with you guys. Thank you for being such a big part of my childhood ❤️
You have to know yourself and your needs REALLY well before dating a single parent of either gender. You also have to have identified and healed your attachment system and core wounds. Here's how to know whether this is right for you:
***Dating a single parent *could be perfect* for what you want IF***
0) you like his kids and they like- and respect- you
1) always wanted a family
2) are just as capable of loving someone else's kids as you are your own
3) maybe don't want your own kids but would love to have kids in your life
4) intend to continue living in your current city, a close-by city, or at least the same state for the long term
5) are fine with not taking vacations or traveling with your partner for extended periods
6) feel financially secure and have clear financial boundaries around whose resources go to the person's kids and when; as well as how much of his resources you expect to go toward your partnership
7) have plenty of your own interests and activities to fill your time
8) can feel secure in your relationship knowing his kids will always come before you
9) feel secure around his ex and his/her involvement in your partnership via their shared children does not bother you
10) have experience and comfort with blended family situations
11) can balance detachment toward his kids and their primary relationship to their own mother with providing additional mothering and mentoring in a different capacity
12) there are clear boundaries around what authority you do and don't have with his kids
13) there are clear boundaries around how his kids behave when they are in your home
14) you like and respect his parenting style
15) you have gone successfully through the first three stages of a relationship with this person (dating, honeymoon, power struggle) and have settled securely into one of the last three stages (stability, commitment, bliss) -- and if not with this person, you have BOTH gone successfully through these stages in other relationships
***additionally, DO NOT combine your life, finances, or household with a single parent before you have made it successfully out of the power struggle stage of the relationship with them and into the stability phase or beyond***
16) you have extremely strong, honest trust and communication with your single parent partner and feel safe advocating for your needs and boundaries
17) you have good trust and communication with his kids and they respect your boundaries
***ON THE CONTRARY, Dating a single parent *could be absolutely wrong* for what you want IF***
0) you don't you like his kids and/or they don't like- and respect- you
***this is non-negotiable- in no instance is it ever okay to proceed in a relationship with a parent whose kids you can't get along with, period***
1) have goals, dreams or ambitions for the long term that will likely take you out of your current living area
2) like to take extended vacations and trips and want to share those with your partner
3) want someone whose financial resources are exclusively available for your partnership
4) have high needs for quality time and intimacy that will go un-met when having to share your partner with his obligations to his kids
5) have bad chemistry with his ex or are unwilling to maintain harmony with her for the sake of his obligations
6) your financial expectations for how much, if any, of YOUR resources go to his children do not align with each other
7) you feel overly attached to his kids
8) you consciously or unconsciously compete with his kids
9) you feel resentment about his children coming before you or continually suppress and ignore your own needs to make a relationship with a single parent work
10) - 17) are missing any of the above things in the "dating a single parent could be perfect for you" list and are not willing or capable of resolving those things
Thank you!
So Im 30 and still focused on growing my career. Do I have to sacrifice my time that I would use to devote to my career advancement to give to the kids when I'm not the biological parent?
love this! 😊
You have such a beautiful soul Alex
Thank you ❤️ You are so sweet!
Please, don't do it. You will fall into a situation that is set up for your heart to 💔 break. The situation will make you feel like an abandoned child. I never knew the saddest version of myself until I fell in love with a man who had children. However, I do believe it's not as challenging if the man is financially stable and mature.
Loved the video ♥️
Hello Alex!! I love your content on CZcams and IG. Could you please give more advices when it comes to date someone with a child? It would help a lot of girls out there. Because we have a different misconception about dating a single dad. Thank you!! ❤️
Also, congratulations to your sister🎉💕
Loved this video! You all sound happy. I’m sure this will be helpful for so many people. :)
Thank you! I hope so, that was my reason for sharing :)
You have an amazing heart! 🥰
great insight :)
I have to give you credit not having kids but this understanding 👌😘❤️❤️❤️❤️nice!
Sometimes I feel like giving up. Am I alone?
why?
No your not I feel the same and we’re not alone
🤭
Woah