Very Legal, Very Cool, And Very Interesting To Mueller

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  • čas přidán 29. 11. 2018
  • Donald Trump's story has come a long way, from claiming no business dealings in Russia to allegedly offering Vladimir Putin a $50 million penthouse in Trump Tower Moscow.
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Komentáře • 2,1K

  • @dontbefatuousjeffrey2494
    @dontbefatuousjeffrey2494 Před 5 lety +309

    "Cool" is a word absolutely no-one associates with Donald Trump.

    • @TheRogueWolf
      @TheRogueWolf Před 5 lety +30

      I disagree! Try this: "Wouldn't it be cool if Donald Trump went to jail for all of his crimes?"

    • @jdsteppenzyde
      @jdsteppenzyde Před 5 lety +5

      My sister in law does. And she’s a lovely person. I have no clue how she still believes in him. I’m strumped.

    • @acciousername6776
      @acciousername6776 Před 5 lety +4

      Janet Dillingham He's a con man. Of course people will be drawn to him.

    • @z.deutch1334
      @z.deutch1334 Před 5 lety +3

      "Turd" suits and reflects what and who Trump is.

    • @BetterLifeAhead35
      @BetterLifeAhead35 Před 5 lety +6

      Except for Trump himself. I can just imagine it: "I am so cool. I am the very meaning of cool. I have all the cool. Everyone is so jealous of my coolness because I took it all and now all the cool is mine. People want my level of cool. Sad!"

  • @paulramos4037
    @paulramos4037 Před 5 lety +332

    Nixon, for all the mistakes he did, at least had an iota of decency to do something patriotic, resigned.

    • @jcdc1824
      @jcdc1824 Před 5 lety +37

      Ah, I miss those simpler times, when lawlessness didn't look good for our President and neither side would stand for it.....

    • @libertyann439
      @libertyann439 Před 5 lety +5

      We'll be lucky if he leaves at the end of his term.

    • @waterandafter
      @waterandafter Před 5 lety +2

      Heart attacks from crappy American diets are also common among patriots.

    • @davidtuttle4648
      @davidtuttle4648 Před 5 lety +9

      Leave it to t. Rump to make Nixon look like a saint

    • @jwoolman3425
      @jwoolman3425 Před 5 lety +12

      The Republicans convinced Nixon that impeachment was inevitable and pushed him to resign. The Grand Jury actually wanted to indict him for criminal activity. The evidence against him was enormous.
      The guy also sabotaged the North/South Vietnam peace talks in 1968 that LBJ was pushing in an attempt to stop the war. Nixon convinced the South Vietnamese President to pull out of the talks, convincing him that he would get a “better deal” if Nixon won. So in order to win an election, Nixon condemned so many Americans and Vietnamese to death. It was treason, and the Republicans also knew it. LBJ wanted to pursue it in public, but was convinced that it would be too difficult because the evidence came from surveillance. So LBJ apparently put everything into a special file to be released 50 years later. Which is 2018.
      Similar situation on a smaller scale when Reagan was running for President. He convinced the Iranians to hold onto the US Embassy hostages for a few more months to make Carter look weak and help Reagan win, in return for being able to buy weapons from the US. So those people languished in captivity much longer than necessary just so Reagan could win the election.

  • @m.c.5795
    @m.c.5795 Před 5 lety +5

    That fleeing to Argentina reference is SCORCHING! Whooo, Stephen and his writers are solid and don’t skip a beat. 😂👏👏

  • @thepassionpursuit2023
    @thepassionpursuit2023 Před 5 lety +348

    I could not survive this Trump presidency without You Stephen

    • @lizdelisle1912
      @lizdelisle1912 Před 5 lety +6

      Amen!!!! Stephen is excellent!!!

    • @donarudotorunpu220
      @donarudotorunpu220 Před 5 lety +3

      Two more years before four more years of trump.

    • @thePronto
      @thePronto Před 5 lety

      I will subscribe to whatever cable/internet provider that streams a live video feed from the showers in Leavenworth penitentiary after 2020. Ordering my popcorn now...

    • @pattikazmer1957
      @pattikazmer1957 Před 5 lety +1

      Donarudo Torunpu FOOL..he will be in jail long before 2020.

    • @camrenmugabe4166
      @camrenmugabe4166 Před 5 lety

      Trump should just leave the White House and Never return.

  • @ZachTheRantingGuy
    @ZachTheRantingGuy Před 5 lety +564

    I just saw Michelle Obama on Stephen Colbert tonight. Man she is an AMAZING woman and she was an amazing First Lady. The Obamas were great! I miss them so much.

    • @heatherbleu5370
      @heatherbleu5370 Před 5 lety +12

      Beautiful People indeed. I remember when Obama would take time after a speech or rally in order to have a heart to heart with someone with little discretion involved. I miss those days

    • @britamagnusson5407
      @britamagnusson5407 Před 5 lety +20

      All of Europe misses the Obamas too!!🤯

    • @QuarrelsomeLocalOaf
      @QuarrelsomeLocalOaf Před 5 lety +6

      Love it when the President and his family provide a *_classy face_* for letting massive financial fraud off the hook and extrajudicially murdering people (including US citizens abroad) with missiles launched from flying death robots in service of the military industrial complex instead of being a blithering game show dipshit

    • @gwen3010
      @gwen3010 Před 5 lety +7

      The last real president and first lady of the United States

    • @soozie6able
      @soozie6able Před 5 lety

      Yep we do!! @@britamagnusson5407

  • @dsantamaria713
    @dsantamaria713 Před 5 lety +155

    Stephen, you've outdone yourself tonight!

  • @seedfamily1404
    @seedfamily1404 Před 5 lety +69

    That is an EXTREMELY comfortable handshake between Salman and Putin, isn't it? These days, you never never know if you're gonna get a classic handshake, a fist bump, a forearm grab, a high five, or the kind that these two engage in...
    Point is: looks like they've done it a time or two.

    • @charlleedodson
      @charlleedodson Před 5 lety +4

      Kelly And Sam Seed They looked like they practiced it at a middle school girls sleepover. It’s to elaborate to be anything other than something made up at a middle school sleepover.

    • @MikeBrown-ex9nh
      @MikeBrown-ex9nh Před 5 lety +3

      It is a celebratory hand shake between two leaders who enjoy having their opponents killed. If Trump does this, look to see who is missing.

    • @alheinzeroth2859
      @alheinzeroth2859 Před 5 lety +4

      Thought they were merely paying 'Poison, Window, Bonesaw'?

    • @HayTatsuko
      @HayTatsuko Před 5 lety +1

      I'm waiting for duelling dabs, TBH.

    • @Direnaar
      @Direnaar Před 5 lety +1

      Watch how happy vlad is

  • @santamonicadave223
    @santamonicadave223 Před 5 lety +225

    Much as I love Letterman, isn't it a blessing that we have Stephen Colbert at this particular time in history. He is the AntiTrump and thank God for him!!

    • @pedigreeann
      @pedigreeann Před 5 lety +6

      If only John Stewart hadn't retired from the Daily Show....,

    • @martinnibataan7046
      @martinnibataan7046 Před 5 lety +11

      @causi haftu so what exactly are you trying to say?
      Orange man good?
      Orange man friend to white man?
      Orange man friend of jesus man?
      Help me out here,

    • @loftsatsympaticodotc
      @loftsatsympaticodotc Před 5 lety +5

      @causi haftu Hey the Causi- of de problema isa now! the Corroder-in-Chief and narcissist without shame, and liar, par excellence, is our biggest problem. If you can't relate to Colbert, watch Fallon, or Kimmel, or yikes for real comedy, fact check Tucker Carlson, and Hannity- they're so brown nosed they've almost turned orange!

    • @marktafel1823
      @marktafel1823 Před 5 lety

      @causi haftu Russian bot lore ...so obvious....

    • @kentwong7896
      @kentwong7896 Před 5 lety

      @causi haftu you know whats funny? in the 3 weeks you wrote this. A lot of shit happened. Mattis. The Dow getting all gains wiped since tax cuts. Trump quoting "poor me". Still think Trump is great?

  • @summasummarum183
    @summasummarum183 Před 5 lety +165

    Turns out all these crimes might not be totally legal. 😂🤣😂🤣😂

    • @jcdc1824
      @jcdc1824 Před 5 lety +6

      and cool?

    • @rachelel9087
      @rachelel9087 Před 5 lety +3

      Didn't seem like anyone else caught that! 😂

    • @summasummarum183
      @summasummarum183 Před 5 lety +7

      Rachel El Sometimes he's so dry he's almost British.

    • @thomasridley8675
      @thomasridley8675 Před 5 lety +1

      Who would imagine such a thing is possible. Crimes being illegal.

    • @DanGolag
      @DanGolag Před 5 lety

      The audience was so late on that one.

  • @twstf8905
    @twstf8905 Před 5 lety +171

    LoL
    OMG this whole chapter in American history would be just EXCRUCIATING without shows like this every night

    • @frankmiller95
      @frankmiller95 Před 5 lety +2

      It;s still excruciating, but this show helps.

    • @baruchben-david4196
      @baruchben-david4196 Před 5 lety +1

      I got news for you. It's plenty excruciating even with the humor...

    • @santorocatena8
      @santorocatena8 Před 5 lety +1

      Amen...Colbert has saved us all from insanity in light of Trump's horse and pony show in the Whitehouse.

  • @gateauxq4604
    @gateauxq4604 Před 5 lety +87

    ‘Don’t annex my apartment’ under appreciated joke of the night

    • @trentmcgready3312
      @trentmcgready3312 Před 5 lety

      Stephen Colbert in a recent interview recalled Les Moonves his former boss on CBS exposed himself to Colbert and said-"Be my girlfriend and I'll put you on any show" he then grabbed him by his catholic balls and pushed him to his knees and forced Colbert to perform a sex act shortly they were interrupted by a phone call and Colbert says he used his tie to wipe off the remaining jizz he couldn't swallow...

    • @diazinth
      @diazinth Před 5 lety +7

      Trent Mcgready how desperate are you?

    • @trentmcgready3312
      @trentmcgready3312 Před 5 lety +1

      Desperate to see the Elites burn for their crimes!

    • @trnharris
      @trnharris Před 4 lety

      @@trentmcgready3312 Nut job.

  • @peterdabrowski3011
    @peterdabrowski3011 Před 5 lety +153

    One of the best monologues to date. Outstanding job Colbert and writers.

    • @juliazorrilla3759
      @juliazorrilla3759 Před 5 lety

      It's been a month and I've already watched this twice while the show is on a holiday break. Stephen looks like he's really enjoying himself with this one

  • @mattcrammer
    @mattcrammer Před 5 lety +345

    I dont think donald trump will resign, he has no shame. Trump makes nixon look like a Saint. Certainly makes Bush 2, look like a genius.

    • @chrissiek8706
      @chrissiek8706 Před 5 lety

      @sgbobsg when's the movie about those two shitbirds coming out? Bale have gone through scary transformation to look like Chaney 😳 i smell the Oscar nomination 😏

    • @divadoll606
      @divadoll606 Před 5 lety

      Nope, not really.

    • @thetruthchannel349
      @thetruthchannel349 Před 5 lety +1

      ALL COMMENTS LIKE THIS COME FROM FAKE ACCOUNTS BEING RUN BY THE DNC SOCIAL MEDIA DEPT

    • @zxKAOS1
      @zxKAOS1 Před 5 lety +9

      _ALL COMMENTS LIKE THIS COME FROM FAKE ACCOUNTS BEING RUN BY THE DNC SOCIAL MEDIA DEPT_
      Thank you for warning us against yourself :p
      (also, as if replubicans don't hire underlings to do the same thing)

    • @mattcrammer
      @mattcrammer Před 5 lety +1

      @@zxKAOS1
      Troll

  • @parthgajjar1607
    @parthgajjar1607 Před 5 lety +228

    Through all of this, don't forget that the Steele Dossier has been proven right at every turn. That thing was legit.

    • @Edu_Kate
      @Edu_Kate Před 5 lety +50

      Oh God. That means the pee pee tape will one day leak.

    • @alexsikar6814
      @alexsikar6814 Před 5 lety +19

      Kate Hillenbrand guess the sheets weren't waterproof 😅😅

    • @sujimtangerines
      @sujimtangerines Před 5 lety +18

      @@Edu_Kate
      Leak? "Bah dum tiss*

    • @floobuscanoobus
      @floobuscanoobus Před 5 lety +1

      marry me...

    • @antonystringfellow5152
      @antonystringfellow5152 Před 5 lety +9

      Parth Gajjar There was never any good reason to doubt it. Steele, a Brit, had absolutely no political affiliations in the US. He shared his intel because he was deeply concerned about the implications for the UK's most important ally. Any threat to the US is, in effect, a threat to the entire free world. At the same time though, you shouldn't expect it to be 100% accurate. Steele himself doesn't expect that. It's raw intel and should be viewed that way. His feeling is that it will turn out to be around 90% accurate, which is pretty darn good for raw intel.

  • @thomasmedeiros5722
    @thomasmedeiros5722 Před 5 lety +6

    Colbert is still in top form. Always followed his Colbert Report before he got his new gig. People should appreciate how intelligent and talented he is!

  • @ntorok
    @ntorok Před 5 lety +9

    This is simply brilliant. Kudos to Colbert and his writers.

  • @indredkold-fusion6126
    @indredkold-fusion6126 Před 5 lety +251

    Not a witch hunt! It’s called excising the orange malignant tumor from American democracy...

    • @christophedlauer1443
      @christophedlauer1443 Před 5 lety +3

      Totally a witch hunt... yes - and I hope the wicked orange witch of the swamp will be caught!

    • @luv2charlie
      @luv2charlie Před 5 lety +4

      Oh, you mean the living oxymoron who swore to protect the constitution but instead keeps trampling it on the way to try to meet and greet dick-tators? Yeah, I think they call it a malignant narcissistic fibrosis tumor....

    • @kimberlys8422
      @kimberlys8422 Před 5 lety +2

      Mueller is doing it with surgical precision.
      I can't wait for this comedy/ drama shit show to be over.

    • @libertyann439
      @libertyann439 Před 5 lety

      Witchy-woo!

    • @georgeb.wolffsohn30
      @georgeb.wolffsohn30 Před 5 lety

      Sometimes you just have to CATCH some witches.

  • @NewMessage
    @NewMessage Před 5 lety +410

    "Putin gave Trump a White House...."
    Trump's given it back to him, though.

    • @KyrieChii
      @KyrieChii Před 5 lety +2

      @Lightgaming Don't forget Israel, they have enough of a share to sick us on Iran. =_=

    • @joernwindler3709
      @joernwindler3709 Před 5 lety

      Karaoke

  • @aprilgostin9576
    @aprilgostin9576 Před 5 lety +165

    If Stephen is not working on a musical about these "Fiasco Years"with Lin Manuel Miranda, I will be terribly disappointed.

    • @janetdonald9801
      @janetdonald9801 Před 5 lety +3

      April Gostin img please contact him and plead. That would be something to look forward to in these dark, dark days.

    • @sunnysside6709
      @sunnysside6709 Před 5 lety +2

      *gets spanked with a rolled up Forbes*
      Lord show me how to say no to this
      *argues with Nancy Pelosi about the wall*
      But no one else was in the room where it happened
      Melania: “and if your wife could share a fraction of your time”
      Donald: “nope”
      “If they tell my story I will either die on the battlefield in glory or have BONE SPURS”
      “The Mueller pamphlet”
      “HAVE YOU READ THIS”
      “WELL HE NEVER GONNA BE PRESIDENT NOW-oh nevermind

  • @Johnwilkinsonofficial
    @Johnwilkinsonofficial Před 5 lety +67

    great satire Is an integral part of resisting authoritarianism. thank you Steven 🙏

  • @noneluiz6331
    @noneluiz6331 Před 5 lety +494

    Mueller Claus is coming in to town.

    • @angelusnielson7135
      @angelusnielson7135 Před 5 lety +3

      And we're all going to be getting a great present...

    • @thetruthchannel349
      @thetruthchannel349 Před 5 lety +3

      YEP. WEARING ORANGE. ALL OF THESE GUYS WILL WIND UP IN PRISON BEFORE THIS IS OVER.

  • @DangerousUrNot
    @DangerousUrNot Před 5 lety +162

    That penthouse/White House joke was top notch. I think they have the best writers bar none.

  • @heyfunny3036
    @heyfunny3036 Před 5 lety +123

    Does anyone else remember Don jr and Eric bragging about having all the funding they needed from Russia, circa 2014-2015?

  • @Bakamoichigei
    @Bakamoichigei Před 5 lety +2

    This monologue was pure 🔥Fire!🔥 Keep the hits comin'!

  • @paulina7116
    @paulina7116 Před 5 lety +191

    I love Colbert

    • @couragekarnga8735
      @couragekarnga8735 Před 5 lety +4

      He helps keep us all somewhat sane. Because I tell you what, this is a very scary time to be alive.

  • @livinginvancouverbc2247
    @livinginvancouverbc2247 Před 5 lety +467

    Trump is not going to Argentina. He's going to the Tallahassee Trail.

    • @JACKTHETRIXTER
      @JACKTHETRIXTER Před 5 lety +3

      LivingInVancouverBC nice. Lol

    • @martinnibataan7046
      @martinnibataan7046 Před 5 lety +10

      Ha good one, if only someone would yell "you lie" to Trump then the irony would be 180 deg.

    • @couragekarnga8735
      @couragekarnga8735 Před 5 lety +8

      Frankly, I wish he would just get lost.

    • @pr0xZen
      @pr0xZen Před 5 lety +2

      Maybe the Mexican Blackbird trail ^^,

    • @Pugetwitch
      @Pugetwitch Před 5 lety +2

      LivingInVancouverBC 😂😂😂😂

  • @themachine8009
    @themachine8009 Před 5 lety +161

    The downfall is going to be my second favorite part of the trump administration; my favorite part will be referring to it in the past tense.

    • @f_USAF-Lt.G
      @f_USAF-Lt.G Před 5 lety +1

      The downfall is going to be my second wife, don't tell my first one... 😉

    • @rameelshabdin3772
      @rameelshabdin3772 Před 5 lety

      Matt Tully Robert De Niro?

    • @trentmcgready3312
      @trentmcgready3312 Před 5 lety

      Wanna know my favorite part?
      Stephen Colbert in a recent interview recalled Les Moonves his former boss on CBS exposed himself to Colbert and said-"Be my girlfriend and I'll put you on any show" he then grabbed him by his catholic balls and pushed him to his knees and forced Colbert to perform a sex act shortly they were interrupted by a phone call and Colbert says he used his tie to wipe off the remaining jizz he couldn't swallow...

    • @blueszooz9031
      @blueszooz9031 Před 5 lety +2

      @@trentmcgready3312 Hey Trent, you seem to be projecting?

    • @grapas100
      @grapas100 Před 5 lety +1

      @@trentmcgready3312 - Wow, that was an eerily detailed comment. Huuumm???

  • @Blitznstitch2
    @Blitznstitch2 Před 5 lety +15

    My first reaction to Stephen reading Trump tweets is that Stephen made it up, no way Trump typed that... But then I check Twitter and... The comedy writes itself.

  • @shanxious
    @shanxious Před 5 lety +184

    Yeah, I’d vote no to living anywhere near Vladimir Putin

    • @cezarcatalin1406
      @cezarcatalin1406 Před 5 lety +6

      Shanna S Well... Trump lives in his rectum

    • @oldmanramblingatclouds
      @oldmanramblingatclouds Před 5 lety +7

      Ahahaha, like you think Putin would allow you a vote!

    • @TheTestingGrounds
      @TheTestingGrounds Před 5 lety

      I think Vladdy would be worth inviting to a cocktail party on occasion. He seems like a fun loving guy.

    • @TheTestingGrounds
      @TheTestingGrounds Před 5 lety

      @@cezarcatalin1406 I think you have it backwards. Trump is the catcher, Vladdy the pitcher.

  • @mlghelp2day
    @mlghelp2day Před 5 lety +43

    "Call 1-555 TO TEN YEARS IN PRISON." Lol 😃🤣😅

  • @BrokeredHeart
    @BrokeredHeart Před 5 lety +93

    "Oh, I get it! I'm a very good developer, happily living my life, when I see our country going in the wrong direction (to put it mildly). Against all odds I decide to run for President, and continue to run my business - very legal and very cool."
    ........................................... Yeah, that's a no from me on all of this.
    1. No, you don't "get it."
    2. You're not a good developer, and even if you were, you shouldn't be running for President.
    3. Your life was about to hit the skids when the Taj Mahal bankrupted for the 4th time and your estate was running out of daddy's money. Add to that a $40 million settlement payout to those people you screwed over by offering them a scholarship to Bovine U, aka Trump University.
    4. The odds were stacked in you favor, as evidenced by the plea bargains of your former campaign manager and former lawyer/fixer and the assumed indictment of your political ally and your eldest son.
    5. And no, it is not "cool" for you to own and operate a company while occupying the Oval Office. The emoluments clause was the first drafted anti-corruption law in the American Constitution by the founding fathers, who looked to remove the impropriety of bribes and gifts from other influencing parties. The mere appearance of a conflict of interest was enough to escort many a former candidate from the list of hopefuls, while Trump can languish in the office while perpetuating his brand both domestically and abroad. It's not even an assumption we can muse over anymore, because he's blatantly stated it himself - Trump is acting in the role of president to benefit his image and his estate first and foremost. All other elements and duties of that office come second, and the well-being and attention to the people who elected him come last.
    Just as many assumed he would, he runs that office as though he owns the country, similar in structure to how he runs his business (which is to say, straight into the ground). He surrounds himself with sycophants and yes men and promotes family members to positions of authority without a care for learned experience or expertise. He believes that the 'company' he's building must be loyal to him above all, to defend his fragile ego, and to bully former allies and trading partners into agreements that benefit only him.
    That's not how any well-run company operates. This is no way to govern a country. The sooner his tyrannical rein comes to an end the better.

    • @DrWhom
      @DrWhom Před 5 lety +6

      Then again "put up zero money, zero guarantees, didn't do the project" does sound like his business MO by all accounts.

    • @nickrich56
      @nickrich56 Před 5 lety +1

      Tre45on

    • @trnharris
      @trnharris Před 6 dny

      💯

  • @TimeandMonotony
    @TimeandMonotony Před 5 lety +1042

    "Argentina: the country all the good guys flee to!" xD

    • @maggierezac5820
      @maggierezac5820 Před 5 lety +18

      @ TimeandMonotony, My first thought was, 'SHOTS FIRED'! Good catch! Peace.

    • @GD-my5hm
      @GD-my5hm Před 5 lety +30

      I wonder if argetininans got salty over this lmao

    • @hm3051
      @hm3051 Před 5 lety +10

      Saltier than a saltine, I'll say.

    • @gabrielaf
      @gabrielaf Před 5 lety +16

      @@GD-my5hm yea...I was like HEY! But then..it's kinda true. Not our fault though, I suppose.

    • @damianmedina07
      @damianmedina07 Před 5 lety +32

      Hey!!! I'm Argentinian and that hurts... But it's true, we can't deny it!

  • @oldladysingsthebluestealec4448

    This guy is an American treasure!

    • @Squashed8Ball
      @Squashed8Ball Před 5 lety +9

      Letterman was an institution but Colbert is on another level completely!

    • @mr559
      @mr559 Před 5 lety +7

      Stephen Colbert, Seth Meyers, and Trevor Noah probably have the best segments when roasting Trump.

    • @thetruthchannel349
      @thetruthchannel349 Před 5 lety +1

      .... SAID EVERY FAKE AMERICAN WHO AMOUNTS TO NOTHING GREATER THAN TRASH.

    • @isaachinds3736
      @isaachinds3736 Před 5 lety +1

      @@thetruthchannel349 *Bonk*

    • @Squashed8Ball
      @Squashed8Ball Před 5 lety +1

      No prizes for spotting the Nike burning, inbred hillbilly, who believes that the Union winning the war was fake news!

  • @Oussmo
    @Oussmo Před 5 lety +88

    Former Trump attorney and guy the vampire is only half way done with hahahaha

    • @ShadyBear420
      @ShadyBear420 Před 5 lety +2

      GLAD you said it!!!!
      I DIED. I laughed HARD AF!!

  • @winterroseluv
    @winterroseluv Před 5 lety +157

    🎶If you’re GUILTY and you know it tweet some more. 👏 👏
    If you’re GUILTY and you know it tweets some more. 👏 👏
    If you’re GUILTY and you know it, then your tweets will surely show it, if you’re GUILTY and you know it tweet some more. 👏 👏🎶

  • @ClaudioMichel
    @ClaudioMichel Před 5 lety +1

    Probably one of the best monologues SC has ever delivered!

  • @yabutmaybenot.6433
    @yabutmaybenot.6433 Před 5 lety +110

    What's up my psycho!
    How's it hanging?
    I mean who you hanging?

    • @rachelel9087
      @rachelel9087 Před 5 lety +5

      ve keell people.

    • @yabutmaybenot.6433
      @yabutmaybenot.6433 Před 5 lety +3

      @@diegolatorre7008 You make a good point. I think so too. They know they can do whatever they want without consequences.

  • @SummersTimeEntertainment
    @SummersTimeEntertainment Před 5 lety +25

    Wow, what great writing. That last bit had me rolling!

  • @gisforhungry
    @gisforhungry Před 5 lety +34

    This monologue killed.

  • @heatherbleu5370
    @heatherbleu5370 Před 5 lety +40

    Oooh Stephen was on *FIRE* tonight!😂😚💙

  • @amishbull6544
    @amishbull6544 Před 5 lety +54

    7:06 "You'll never catch me batman!" hahaha

    • @andyh5300
      @andyh5300 Před 5 lety +1

      “You’ll never catch me Muller!!!” Lol

  • @TheNickHaas
    @TheNickHaas Před 5 lety +12

    OMG that Guys and Dolls bit was gold

    • @fomoran
      @fomoran Před 5 lety +1

      Nick Haas much improved by batiste shouting "its a musical" whilst the audience laughed... Or it could have been an unfunny attention-hungry bandleader trampling on colbert's laughter.

  • @SpaceCattttt
    @SpaceCattttt Před 5 lety +1

    See how much better it is when you upload the entire monologue instead of a separate video for every sentence spoken in it?
    More of this, please.

  • @vercoda9997
    @vercoda9997 Před 5 lety +75

    I prefer my colluders who aren’t caught.

  • @dunnbrandon
    @dunnbrandon Před 5 lety +66

    Mueller if can pull off the bust of the century, deserves a Noble Peace Prize

    • @Aqua.man045
      @Aqua.man045 Před 5 lety

      Brandon more like a firing squad.

    • @Paul0000
      @Paul0000 Před 5 lety

      Imagine the ratings when this gets to court, trump will be boasting about them all his sentence long.

    • @dsmith9412
      @dsmith9412 Před 5 lety

      Mueller should be on the cover of Time magazine too

    • @DrWhom
      @DrWhom Před 5 lety

      No, to get one of those you have to murder millions and then _stop doing it_

  • @lola13802
    @lola13802 Před 5 lety +22

    "Can't torture after 11 pm."😂😂😂

  • @starrycrown
    @starrycrown Před 5 lety

    Bless Colbert and Company. They have been a god-send through this whole nightmare. When it’s over, they deserve some sort of medals. Really. Especially Stephen.

  • @fortepiano4491
    @fortepiano4491 Před 5 lety +13

    Thank you, Manafort! Very Legal, Very Cool

  • @joelh3030
    @joelh3030 Před 5 lety +20

    best monologue

  • @freddiekruger5009
    @freddiekruger5009 Před 5 lety +58

    Stephen Colbert Rocks😅😆😂

    • @alondathomas293
      @alondathomas293 Před 5 lety

      Hell, yeah---a big thumbs-up for Mr. C---telling it like it is, and speaking the truth about on this joke of an adminstration!

    • @freddiekruger5009
      @freddiekruger5009 Před 5 lety

      ON A COMICAL LEVEL OMG I PEED MY PANTS 😂🖒

  • @rachelel9087
    @rachelel9087 Před 5 lety +1

    Quite possibly my favourite monologue from you ever, Stephen.

  • @thomashounsome7737
    @thomashounsome7737 Před 5 lety +2

    "fugue for douchebags"... Now I have to go to a new keyboard, as my coffee is all over my desk from laughing so hard!

  • @carolynthomsen5816
    @carolynthomsen5816 Před 5 lety +9

    The cast of characters in Trumps world Corci, Philix Sadler, Roger Stone, Cohen, Nunnberg, Flynn, Bannon...it’s like the evil characters in Batman!

  • @niceguy2171
    @niceguy2171 Před 5 lety +33

    The funniest thing is trump's cult followers trying to still say there is nothing there..when that email nailed that coffin shut! It just shouldn't be allowed to go on any longer, enough of providing entertainment to the world at the United States of America's expense.

    • @joeblough2812
      @joeblough2812 Před 5 lety +1

      I am so tired of their bs. Nothing will stop it not even The Traitor in prison.

  • @zap2002
    @zap2002 Před 5 lety +2

    Great monologue tonight. That guys and dolls bit had us laughing for 2 straight minutes.

  • @jankodes197
    @jankodes197 Před 5 lety +1

    That Nixon impersonation nearly killed my keyboard - note to self: don't drink while watching Colbert.

  • @GNCCentric
    @GNCCentric Před 5 lety +7

    That's really insulting to Bert and Ernie actually... 🤨

  • @Silentmessengerqun
    @Silentmessengerqun Před 5 lety +4

    Steve know he be killing it when he says “ allegedly”😂🤣

  • @jimijames9642
    @jimijames9642 Před 5 lety

    Stephen!!!
    Wow, you hit that one out of the park.
    Thank You!

  • @debbiegross3136
    @debbiegross3136 Před 5 lety +126

    🤣😂😹 One of your best monologues!

  • @judcitizen706
    @judcitizen706 Před 5 lety +118

    Probably the most talented satirist of my lifetime.

    • @acciousername6776
      @acciousername6776 Před 5 lety +5

      Let the -Hunger Games- fanwars begin!!

    • @Bazemore7
      @Bazemore7 Před 5 lety

      Nahh colbert is just so legendary but I do love my Oliver

    • @mrsrcadalzo
      @mrsrcadalzo Před 5 lety +3

      Agree with Jud citizen, Colbert's vocal and physical comedy range is sparking and coruscating ( ooh-er!). He and his writers hit the spot unerringly. Seth and Trevor also on top of their game, fantastic . Someone mentioned Oliver -he is rather one-note to me, got some weird bum jumping , wriggling thing going on , quite distracting.

    • @joesdi
      @joesdi Před 5 lety

      YAAS.

    • @mr559
      @mr559 Před 5 lety +5

      Stephen, Seth, and Trevor are on top of their game and makes it funny, with their own funny Trump impressions. Oliver's longer segments are informative and makes you see the ridiculousness of the situations.

  • @marciaclarke3898
    @marciaclarke3898 Před 5 lety +34

    Excellent, Stephen! Love the "Donald Trump/Big Fat Rump" to the tune from Guys & Dolls. He does sound more and more like a wanna=be Mafiosi every time he speaks. Good one!

  • @unbotheredmovement
    @unbotheredmovement Před 5 lety +16

    Call 1-555-to 10 year in prison. Brilliant!😂😂

  • @philippecolas4646
    @philippecolas4646 Před 5 lety +2

    Wow, this one of funniest videos. I haven't laughed so hard, and so many times. Thanks, made my week .

  • @niharkasuryvanshi5441
    @niharkasuryvanshi5441 Před 5 lety +523

    He rock that musical 😂😂😂😂😂😂

    • @blaze556922
      @blaze556922 Před 5 lety +2

      Don't forget to take your pills

    • @atlpeach7186
      @atlpeach7186 Před 5 lety +8

      Niharka Suryvanshi lol, yes he did! 🤣🤣🤣

    • @enviromental1189
      @enviromental1189 Před 5 lety

      His name is Donald Trump, he's got a big fat rump, hacha cha cha cha

    • @adam.maqavoy
      @adam.maqavoy Před 5 lety

      @niharkasuryvanshi Just do not, not [GET-ME-STARTED].
      No, I f%#$!:ing mean it.

    • @adam.maqavoy
      @adam.maqavoy Před 5 lety

      P.S: We've the russian embassy nearby (I do not mind) becauae I've some russian friends.

  • @LexBlazer
    @LexBlazer Před 5 lety +1429

    "No Collusion, No Obstruction" are pretty much 2018's "Four legs good, two legs better", for you Animal Farm lovers out there....

    • @TheRobster2007
      @TheRobster2007 Před 5 lety +51

      The Trumpies will no doubt get that reference wrong, and instead excitedly root out an old dvd with the same name, but a slightly different subject...

    • @couragekarnga8735
      @couragekarnga8735 Před 5 lety +40

      I fear this is turning into an Orlellian nightmare.

    • @null0byte
      @null0byte Před 5 lety +33

      @@couragekarnga8735 Turning?

    • @ItRemindMeOfHome
      @ItRemindMeOfHome Před 5 lety +54

      @@couragekarnga8735, we entered Orwellian in 2001 with the passage of the Patriot Act

    • @couragekarnga8735
      @couragekarnga8735 Před 5 lety +17

      @@ItRemindMeOfHome I'm afraid you're right. Now, whether we'll ever make it out of this, I don't know.

  • @seanurbik5158
    @seanurbik5158 Před 5 lety +13

    Perhaps when he wants to come back, he'll have to go through the normal immigration process, that'll change his mind very quickly...

  • @katiekane5247
    @katiekane5247 Před 5 lety +102

    Arrestivus, a holiday for the rest of us!

    • @TimeandMonotony
      @TimeandMonotony Před 5 lety +8

      If Trump is indicted it will truly be an Arrestivus miracle!

    • @trentmcgready3312
      @trentmcgready3312 Před 5 lety

      Stephen Colbert in a recent interview recalled Les Moonves his former boss on CBS exposed himself to Colbert and said-"Be my girlfriend and I'll put you on any show" he then grabbed him by his catholic balls and pushed him to his knees and forced Colbert to perform a sex act shortly they were interrupted by a phone call and Colbert says he used his tie to wipe off the remaining jizz he couldn't swallow...

  • @tanggo
    @tanggo Před 5 lety +7

    The Manchurian candidate

  • @alexisrivera200xable
    @alexisrivera200xable Před 5 lety +84

    Seems like Stephen now has the perfect title for the follow up book to "Who's Boat is this Boat?" (As in "Who's Tower is this Tower?") and if you guys want the title for the third installment I humbly suggest you use "Who's Jail cell is this jail cell?" for that one. Its a trilogy like Lord of the Rings but instead chronicling the story of the ring of power its all about the "pee pee" tape! :) and the fellowship is just flipping on each other under the all seeing eye of Mueller...

    • @chrissiek8706
      @chrissiek8706 Před 5 lety +7

      Oh , we can make it into entire saga!
      "Collusion? What collusion?"
      "Who's kids are those kids?" - 2 part edition, one for the separated at the border children, another one when Donny flips on his kids 😏 Also, bonus coloring book "Eric? Eric!!!"
      And lets not forget upcoming First lady's memoirs, "Becoming... The gold digger [limited] edition", and Ivanka's "Feckless: the untold story of 1st daughterwife", Jared's children book in the style of Huckleberry Finn, "Adventures of Jared Kushner and MBS" (pre-order now and get complimentary bone sow!)
      The recipe book "Breakfast at Tiffany's: NOT from federal prison"
      I feel, like i left out the Jr, but that seems to be just his life's story - no wife anymore, question if girlfriend will stick, and even his name is not his own 😉😏

    • @alexisrivera200xable
      @alexisrivera200xable Před 5 lety

      @@chrissiek8706 Indeed, the comedy sadly writes itself.

  • @yolamontalvan9502
    @yolamontalvan9502 Před 5 lety +1

    MORE BOMBSHELLS PLEASE. Gotta get more popcorn 🍿.

  • @waggishsagacity7947
    @waggishsagacity7947 Před 5 lety +1

    The Hot Line for Colluders is absolutely brilliant! thanks, Stephen Colbert.

  • @rickj9615
    @rickj9615 Před 5 lety +3

    There’s only one Colbert - he cracks me up and I learn something at the same time 😉

  • @KingOfMadCows
    @KingOfMadCows Před 5 lety +51

    Pretty sure that was a Futurama Nixon impression.

  • @JTuaim
    @JTuaim Před 5 lety +27

    According to the above thumbs down; there's still 227 people left in Trump's base.

    • @ispearedbritney
      @ispearedbritney Před 5 lety +5

      Russki bots, teenager trolls, and a few inbred trash who never leave the trailer park. Nothing to worry about- look at the ratio.

    • @jcdc1824
      @jcdc1824 Před 5 lety

      JTuaim with internet access and the knowledge to use it.

    • @helveticaification
      @helveticaification Před 5 lety

      @TheTruthIsRacist Obviously you are not one of them.

  • @bluegreenglue6565
    @bluegreenglue6565 Před 5 lety +1

    Cohen: "...the guy the vampire is only half done with..." [explosive laughter]

  • @daviddelaney2407
    @daviddelaney2407 Před 5 lety +14

    "Bert & Ernie's love-child" - Stephen! I'm shocked! You know they've been happily married for more than 4 decades.
    --Dave, it was a small ceremony, catered by Oscar

    • @ValerieJNorse
      @ValerieJNorse Před 5 lety +1

      Bummer! Catering would have been much better done by the Cookie Monster!

    • @georgeb.wolffsohn30
      @georgeb.wolffsohn30 Před 5 lety

      . . . The Grouch, or . . . Meyer Wiener.

  • @joabjohnstone5217
    @joabjohnstone5217 Před 5 lety +8

    Seeing that guy at the summit is disgusting

  • @alexp1156
    @alexp1156 Před 5 lety +1

    S.C. is going to go down as a legend

  • @erickoontz6835
    @erickoontz6835 Před 5 lety +1

    Stephen is just THE BEST!!!

  • @donalee5472
    @donalee5472 Před 5 lety +9

    Stephen, you are great. Or your writers are, but still -- your delivery. Love you.

  • @gregvondare
    @gregvondare Před 5 lety +5

    "Sit down, sit down, sit down, sit down, sit down you're rockin' the boat!"

  • @smittykins
    @smittykins Před 5 lety +1

    I love how every time Stephen mentions jail/prison, the band plays the opening notes of “Jailhouse Rock.”

  • @ayanaholder368
    @ayanaholder368 Před 5 lety +1

    😂😂😂 Stephen you owe us like 4 'Alter Egos', man! 😂

  • @xtlsvideopodthelaststate1843

    "Fugue for Douchebags"
    Nice.
    -R

    • @jayblack2093
      @jayblack2093 Před 5 lety +3

      I rarely laugh out loud when watching youtube by myself, but as Colbert finished singing that little song I lost it. Then I started feeling sad that he stopped singing because I wasn't ready for it to end...

  • @kidmohair8151
    @kidmohair8151 Před 5 lety +7

    and I misquote
    ".....the American people have a right to know their president is a crook..."

  • @winterlucy
    @winterlucy Před 5 lety +1

    Greetings from Argentina! Were all the good guys flee to 😂 We love you Stephen

  • @klmhookedmoore5847
    @klmhookedmoore5847 Před 5 lety

    Stephen Colbert is the best! No one compares to him in talk show tv.

  • @Mr.Eternal966
    @Mr.Eternal966 Před 5 lety +23

    That Ad..... !!! looool, man this was awesome

  • @risingdawn6393
    @risingdawn6393 Před 5 lety +16

    2:31 And then mark zukerberg chimed in, "I helped!"

  • @susana9912
    @susana9912 Před 5 lety +1

    “Putin gave trump a whitehouse”
    WHATTTT!!!! Crowd goes wild

  • @straef1042
    @straef1042 Před 5 lety +1

    Brilliant, the best segment in a while 😂

  • @faceoff3315
    @faceoff3315 Před 5 lety +5

    Make America great again Impeach Donald J Trump and Mike Pence

    • @Aqua.man045
      @Aqua.man045 Před 5 lety

      George Lewis what did nike pence do?

  • @MrVikingsandra
    @MrVikingsandra Před 5 lety +3

    You're pure awesomeness Stephen

  • @tenacious1
    @tenacious1 Před 5 lety +1

    Stephen and his writers are so funny! I love him.

  • @troy_d33neyy91
    @troy_d33neyy91 Před 5 lety

    Brilliant monologue, absolutely brilliant

  • @Gyongy501
    @Gyongy501 Před 5 lety +6

    Priceless!! Thank God for Colbert or the last 2 years would have pushed me over the brink.

  • @juliesevilla3950
    @juliesevilla3950 Před 5 lety +4

    Stephen should produce Donald Trump's musical

  • @bwuh
    @bwuh Před 5 lety

    Possibly the best monologue to date.

  • @AH-cy4md
    @AH-cy4md Před 5 lety +1

    I love it when Colbert breaks into song and dance!