We Gotta Start Spanking the Kids Again
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- čas přidán 7. 08. 2023
- Why "Emotionally Sensitive Parenting" doesn't work
From my third special John Crist: Would Like To Release a Statement, filmed live at the Majestic Theater in Dallas, TX.
Watch the full special here:
• John Crist: Would Like... - Komedie
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I remember when my oldest son told me "if you spank me I'm going to call social services", so I handed him the phone and told him "go ahead and make the call but before you do know that I can either give you a normal spanking for being disobedient or you can choose to call them and I can spank you from now until the time they get here. Your call, what would you like to do?". He opted for the normal spanking because he knew I never bluffed and I never lied to him. He grew up, went to university and became a mechanical engineer. Funny thing about discipline, it builds self discipline and self discipline builds self esteem. If you love your kids, you discipline them.
Thank you! (I'm 17 and completely agree)
❤❤❤❤
@@violetnorwen8491 I got spanked, I'm now over 60, was going to counciling a while ago, the councilor was in her 30's, when I mentioned getting spanked she said I was abused, she was dead serious!
My friend tried that with his Dad. 6'8 hands like a bears claw. His Dad told him go ahead and call it's 8 minutes before the cops can get here, and in those 8 minutes your ass is mine.
He didn't call
@@RJ1999x wow. That guy sounds like he probably beat his wife too.
Healthy "fear" /reverence of parents and God is what's missing.
It’s called respect.
@jackiefrisosky it's called narcissism 🤡
Proverbs 13:24
He who spares his rod hates his son
Like my Mom said, respect is 80 percent love and 20 percent fear.
@@DynamicGracernothing like cherry picking and changing the meaning. Do any of y'all actually read your Bible?
Years ago my sister was at a lake swimming and there were several other people there as well. There was a young boy that had a small puppy and he kept holding it under water saying he was teaching it to swim. Not in a so young doesn't know any better way, but in a very cruel way. After repeatedly telling him to stop before he drowned the poor thing, my sister warned him if she seen him do it again she was going to slap him. Well.... He didn't listen. Mind you she didn't know this child, but that didn't stop her. He had been warned. She looked up to see him looking directly at her while completely submerging this poor, poor, puppy. Without a word she stood up walked right to him smacked his face hard while simultaneously taking the dog from him. He cried and screamed "I'm telling my mom"! She replied "Good I'd like to smack her too". Well... Turns out it was the lady that had been sitting right next to where she had. She calmly walked after the child to his mother, looked her right in the face, and said "I know that you could see exactly what I was seeing and it's a shame that a stranger had to keep your heathen from killing this pup. I suggest you put your phone down and act like a mother to this brat before it's more than an animal that he tries to harm". The lady put her head down as my sister handed the dog to her and began scolding the fit throwing child as they left.
I would not have given her the dog.
That's certainly not going to increase his sympathy for animals or humans just increase spite, resentment etc, and all the other hateful feeling's already present exasperated, what was demonstrated was "bigger party gets to order smaller around and if they don't listen they get to enact violence on them" reason we have war in the world, something none of us are born with a desire to wage but all get conditioned with the above ideology in both subtle and not so subtle ways and then wage them after. It's a conflict resolution ideology she endorsed that day, if done in a country like Sweden I hope she would have been arrested for assault of a minor and classed as a criminal like she would if she hit anybody else for the same reason including vile remorseless criminals.
Yeah...she shouldn't have given the dog back. It was probably dunked again 5 minutes later.
@@Mr.Goodkatdisliked this video 😜
@@rebekahtablante327 I actually never give it a dislike.
When my daughter was 7 I told her when we get home I needed her help cleaning up. And she looked me dead ass in the eyes and said "queens don't clean they have peasants for that" and it was on that day I immediately changed how I parented my kids.
Yeah..well when you become a Queen you can hire your peasants 😆
It's unfortunate that it took you 7 years to figure out how to parent your kids. And changing your style like that is unhealthy and confusing. I'm sure you've failed miserably.
@@stacyg585 it's unfortunate u feel the need to chime in on a situation that doesn't pertain to you. My parenting is just fine Karen no kids with criminal records all kids old enough to graduate at this point graduated early with honors and now attend college (3 of 5) and every single one of them would give you the last dollar they had to help. All 5 hold doors all 5 say yes ma'am and sir not because I required it because they understand what respecting others means. Which judging by your very condescending two cents not a damn person asked for, over a comment that was a funny story I'd say you don't understand the definition. But think what u want I'll continue watching my children thrive into stand up human beings and you can keep being a sourpuss. If that's failing as a parent I'll happily keep failing. K thanks.
@@kaileegomoluh407 You don’t need to hit your kids for them to not turn out to be criminals. However, hitting someone IS a criminal act. So while they somehow managed to avoid becoming degenerates despite your beatings, it’s you who has turned yourself into a criminal. Congratulations!
Children know nothing about self-control other than that taught by parents and teachers.
Therefore, the mistakes children make in responding to life and their ups-and-downs, can only be accepted in good spirit by parents and teachers, since children have no understanding of what is driving them.
If children want something - they WANT something right away and wonder why they cannot have it. There is nothing more in the minds of children than this. Children see something they like - they want it.
It is cruel to tell children roughly: "No! You cannot have it," their entire system is insulted and assaulted. From earliest babyhood, the training process must be initiated by logic and reassurance - affirming the rights of children to feel secure within their environment. The sense of security of children should be developed by explaining the right way to express their wishes. UNCONDITIONAL LOVE - not irritation or anger, must choose the words which tell children why they cannot have what they want. Children will hear the message when given in unconditional love.
When delivered in anger, it provokes children and begins to take form as resentment - overt or hidden or a sense of deep seated frustration, reducing the natural sense of inner validity of children. Children need to possess this sense of personal validity and should not be subdued or destroyed.
It requires parents or teachers to point out, very clearly, that other people in the world also have their needs, their rights to their possessions, their desire for peace and pleasure. No one, not even children - or adult - has the right to offend another person in order to obtain their own satisfaction!
If another child hits your child and makes him cry, it is only natural for your child to want to fight back - he is programmed to defend himself against the other child.
It calls for parents and teachers to point out that "payback," revenge in conflict, only escalates, bringing more pain to children, and for this reason, "payback" is entirely pointless.
Better to LAUGH and turn away. And rather than allow the irritation and hurt in the mind to continue, better still to take the problem to CONSCIOUSNESS ("God") in prayer and ask for the hurt to be removed from the consciousness of children, and seek a means of reconciliation.
Children should also be taught to take time to understand that all children are equally children born of the Divine Moment. When children are spiritually receptive and can make this procedure of recognizing their spiritual kinship with all children and all living things, and the "rights of children equal with each other," into a habit, they will be given the greatest spiritual gift possible. In such a way, is the selfhood/personality (humanhood) weakened by the practical daily application of unconditional love, while the central "I"ness of children remains strong and self-confident.
Children should be taught the benefits of laughter.
Therefore, skilled and insightful teaching is absolutely necessary to steer children into an appreciation of the rights of all people - EQUAL WITH THEIR OWN RIGHTS.
This is the spiritual law which should dominate the home and the classroom. Any other law by which to judge circumstances is faulty and lacking in balance.
The best teaching will rely - not on the "because I say so" attitude - but on a systematic reference in every circumstance to "unconditional love" and the equal rights of all.
At the same time, children should not be indoctrinated in "self-sacrifice" since this type of caring must be willing and born only of the spiritual perceptions and goals of the individual.
Self-sacrifice is born of spiritual enlightenment, of a higher road to follow, of denial of the selfhood/personality (humanhood) to remove the barriers obstructing attunement with the universality of Consciousness ("God"). True enlightened Self-sacrifice brings a spiritual consciousness to the heights of joy. There is no sense of loss in any form.
Never got a spanking I didn’t deserve! I appreciate my parents. As a teacher I couldn’t help but laugh because this skit is SO ACCURATE. Parents, you’ve got to do better. You’ll be ok if you discipline your child, and your kid will grow up to respect you!
No they won't. If you respect your parents it's in spite of them losing their temper with you and assaulting you. Not because of it.
@@pastorofmuppets8834 I was NEVER assaulted. Grow up buttercup.
A spanking is much different than assault. 🙄
@@pastorofmuppets8834I am so sorry you had such an obviously terrible childhood with parents who lost their cool and hit you. Not everyone had a childhood like that, however. You shouldn't project.
@@nathanshaw9688 I had a fantastic childhood. I had loving parents. The problem with parents today is that they want to be children’s friends rather than their mentor and parent. I have a great career, and have confidence in myself. I didn’t need someone to coddle me to make me responsible. I needed structure which is what all children need. Don’t make assumptions when you don’t have the facts.
My dad came down from the pulpit mid sermon once to spank me. I have sat still in church ever since. 😂😂😂
Just for not sitting still in church. Stuff like this is abuse! I went to a a small church group where one of the leaders would spank her children for falling asleep in church. A former sister-in-law said one son was whipped for not doing homework right.
@@marshahollings haha, I think it was for biting my brother.
@@ntme6506 That merits a spanking
For biting? Case settled.
I’m sure it was mortifying, but he learned an extremely valuable lesson! If more parents would be that way the world would be a totally different place! 😆
So many of those parents found out what their kids were truly like during lockdown…..and if it didn’t bother them then they’re the source of the problem because they are the role models.
By assaulting their children?
@pastorofmuppets8834 wow I'm really sorry if you were assaulted as a child. But a loving parent spanking their child as a form of discipline is not assault.
Pastor of muppets…I serve a warrior savior. God chastises those he loves. There is a difference between discipline and abuse. My parents loved me enough to do the hard work and I loved my children enough to do the same. We learned respect at the end of a belt or switch. I don’t remember the pain, but I live the lessons learned.
@@apriloverstreet2174 oh yes, blame God for this. Like a good minister who abuses their flock, using the Bible to justify their evil.
Is that how you justify you abusing your partner? They have to submit to you? Otherwise they asked for it, right?
@@pastorofmuppets8834 A short but firm spanking is an effective form of discipline. It’s not assault. I was only ever spanked once as a kid and it worked. I never again wanted to disrespect my parents. It made me feel ashamed for misbehaving, remorseful, and like I needed to grow up and wise up so I wouldn’t be treated like a misbehaving brat again.
It worked. And it’s FAR better for a child’s longterm development than letting them run riot or pandering to them like they’re princesses. We’ve run that social experiment for 30 years and the results were disastrous.
I've been a teacher for 19 years and I can tell you that so many parents don't hold their kids accountable and don't discipline their kids.
I've worked as a Walmart toys/pets/seasonal merchandise manager.
So
My favorite thing was parents just bringing their crotch goblins to Jesus if they tore up the toy dept.
Did I see anything? Nope! Some shitty kids around here, tore the area up, but sadly they left before their parents corralled them. Must have happened in another part of the store.
I had the parents back, you gotta do what you gotta do, parents. I don't speak for all Walmarts or managers, but from about 2002 to like 2014 if a kid got straight up pimp of the year backhanded, the parent was seen to be a angel from the highest heavens, and we knew them kids would be learnin that day.
Sadly, the number of times I'd hear "go to toys and play until I'm done with my shopping" which means, tear toys out of packaging and leave with a choice of toy
Hooooo boy thatd piss us all off
i've been learning just how bad it is recently in schools
Doesn't mean they should hit their kids
@@threadtapwhisperer5136that’s messed up. The store is not their personal playroom. My kid respects authority and understands general decency so if I wanted, I could let him look at toys and he would just look. Every age 2 or 3 tantrum was responded with logical explanation for why he couldn’t get his way. And if emotions were too high, he would get it later when he was calm. Not giving in to it. If he loved something so much that the addiction made him crazy, he just would just have to go cold turkey. Eventually I could give him screen time and he could turn it off himself without a tantrum. Teach limits/ say no when they are young and it makes it easier.
@@threadtapwhisperer5136 so what part of that story means you have to hit children?
I grew up in a time when kids spanked in public for acting up.
Do you want a cookie?
@@kreskin0079kids these days don’t get any discipline that’s the problem.
I remember when my youngest son now 22 years old thought I wouldn't spank him because we were in a grocery store. So, he pitched a fit about something. I snatched him out of the cart and spanked him right there in the aisle in front of all the other shoppers and grocery workers. Funny thing, he never tested me like that in public ever again. He was probably around 4 or 5 at the time.
@@AndyTheCornbreadthat’s how it’s done 👏
2hy is that not a thing still?!?! (17 year old homeschooler)
“Skyler would never! Skyler would never!” The imitation with his movements is gold! I can’t stop watching it! 😂😂😂
So glad someone is talking about this. Comedy is a great way too. Man, the “gentle parents” have literally the worst behaved kids, it’s the worst to be around those unruly kids.
Children know nothing about self-control other than that taught by parents and teachers.
Therefore, the mistakes children make in responding to life and their ups-and-downs, can only be accepted in good spirit by parents and teachers, since children have no understanding of what is driving them.
If children want something - they WANT something right away and wonder why they cannot have it. There is nothing more in the minds of children than this. Children see something they like - they want it.
It is cruel to tell children roughly: "No! You cannot have it," their entire system is insulted and assaulted. From earliest babyhood, the training process must be initiated by logic and reassurance - affirming the rights of children to feel secure within their environment. The sense of security of children should be developed by explaining the right way to express their wishes. UNCONDITIONAL LOVE - not irritation or anger, must choose the words which tell children why they cannot have what they want. Children will hear the message when given in unconditional love.
When delivered in anger, it provokes children and begins to take form as resentment - overt or hidden or a sense of deep seated frustration, reducing the natural sense of inner validity of children. Children need to possess this sense of personal validity and should not be subdued or destroyed.
It requires parents or teachers to point out, very clearly, that other people in the world also have their needs, their rights to their possessions, their desire for peace and pleasure. No one, not even children - or adult - has the right to offend another person in order to obtain their own satisfaction!
If another child hits your child and makes him cry, it is only natural for your child to want to fight back - he is programmed to defend himself against the other child.
It calls for parents and teachers to point out that "payback," revenge in conflict, only escalates, bringing more pain to children, and for this reason, "payback" is entirely pointless.
Better to LAUGH and turn away. And rather than allow the irritation and hurt in the mind to continue, better still to take the problem to CONSCIOUSNESS ("God") in prayer and ask for the hurt to be removed from the consciousness of children, and seek a means of reconciliation.
Children should also be taught to take time to understand that all children are equally children born of the Divine Moment. When children are spiritually receptive and can make this procedure of recognizing their spiritual kinship with all children and all living things, and the "rights of children equal with each other," into a habit, they will be given the greatest spiritual gift possible. In such a way, is the selfhood/personality (humanhood) weakened by the practical daily application of unconditional love, while the central "I"ness of children remains strong and self-confident.
Children should be taught the benefits of laughter.
Therefore, skilled and insightful teaching is absolutely necessary to steer children into an appreciation of the rights of all people - EQUAL WITH THEIR OWN RIGHTS.
This is the spiritual law which should dominate the home and the classroom. Any other law by which to judge circumstances is faulty and lacking in balance.
The best teaching will rely - not on the "because I say so" attitude - but on a systematic reference in every circumstance to "unconditional love" and the equal rights of all.
At the same time, children should not be indoctrinated in "self-sacrifice" since this type of caring must be willing and born only of the spiritual perceptions and goals of the individual.
Self-sacrifice is born of spiritual enlightenment, of a higher road to follow, of denial of the selfhood/personality (humanhood) to remove the barriers obstructing attunement with the universality of Consciousness ("God"). True enlightened Self-sacrifice brings a spiritual consciousness to the heights of joy. There is no sense of loss in any form.
@@edgarmorales4476 You didn't know much about developmental psychology, do you? Or even how people learn?
Most people use their minds recklessly, blighting their lives and the lives of other people with their negative thoughts and words arising from their humanhood. For it is only your thought life and emotional upheavals which end in quarrels and mayhem-not your face, body, hands and legs unless the quarrels end in physical abuse. But even bodily conflict has its origins in the frustration of the humanhood within mind and emotions, and conveyed to the limbs to vent the uncontrollable wrath.
In this way, marriages-and friendships-begin in mutual joy and eventually end in misery and mutual rejection-because people find it impossible to channel their humanhood into life and love-preserving modes of self-expression.
Most parents and children express mutual love until the teen years, then hatred enters the scene and sours the relationship when children rebel against authority and parents react with self-righteous abuse. Again! There is no need for such conflict. Parents must surely realize that every generation fights to find its feet in the adult world and do things more innovatively than did their elders? How can young people thrive if restricted or prevented from free action or expression?
When children become young adults, this is "growing time" for parents, who must now prepare for the next stage of their life-the more inspired use of their latent talents, then old age, acceptance of their past follies and mistakes, and, at last, a peaceful transition into eternal Light.
Why quarrel? Why fight? People wholly controlled by their humanhood let fly and hammer away for their "rights." Mature people solve problems by discussing them empathetically.
What does this mean in human terms? It means-listening to the other person with the spoken or silent acknowledgement that the way the other person felt/feels in a certain situation is as valid and worthy of respect as were/are your feelings.
When overtaken by a serious confrontation in which neither of you are prepared to yield an iota of ground, go away on your own and take time to realize that what you are engaged in is a "battle of consciousness." The battle is not enjoined only as a result of what was actually done and said in a moment of extreme heat-what really took place was the upshot of what you both are-in consciousness.
This involves your backgrounds. The conflict springs from the personality itself, the type of programming a person possesses, the basic perceptions of right and wrong, the normal attitudes each have towards other people and life generally. Therefore, when you have conflict or confrontation, tell your opponent you are taking time off to stand still and quieten your mind to be able to listen more helpfully.
Then-be very wise. Call on "God" for an intervention of Unconditional Love into the situation.
Try to realize-and visualise-that both of you stand in the Light of "God," equal in soul origins, equal in destiny-equally real, equally human, equally unique.
Until you can fully immerse yourself in this realization-this state of mind-you are not yet ready to stand in the Light to unconditionally lovingly sort out your conflicts and hurt feelings.
@@edgarmorales4476 That was a lot of words to say nothing
You can use your talents as a parent, seeking the best means of becoming successful in your job of promoting your children's well-being.
What higher calling is there than to be a "good unconditionally loving parent," more especially if you take as your role model "Father-Mother Consciousness" which is entirely directed at growth, nutrition of mind and body, healing of mind and body, regeneration of mind and body, protection in every form and the fulfillment of every need of mind, emotions and body-within a system of Law and Order and Unconditional Love.
As a parent-have you measured up to the Consciousness of the "Divine Source of Being?"
Think of families where emotional and mental abuse is rife. This is an abhorrent use of "mental power." It rebounds to the abuser in many, many ways-ill-health, sickness, addictions, depression and loss of self-esteem.
However, do not use your brain, intellect, insight, knowledge and education as a platform from which to criticize, judge and condemn others who do not measure up to your own standards of efficiency or goodness in any area of your life.
At the same time-since to criticize, judge and condemn is as natural as breathing to the human ego-do not attempt to deny your perceptions of what might be improved. To do so is to deny the reality of the evolutionary process.
Couldn't agree more. "Emotionally sensitive" parenting really doesn't work. I was raised on that shit and ended up with a slew of mental problems that I still struggle in my 40's. I got unlucky to have "progressive" parents during the time when most kids were still getting spanked in public. They all got miles ahead of me and turned out to be successful adults while I was struggling to function as a human being because I'd never been given any direction and had my emotions amplified to a crippling extent.
Yeah. I'm constantly typing in comments that love helps a child realize they're NOT the center of the universe. We do that by making them participate with the family at times. Learning how to express displeasure neutrally (no tantrums, big ugly faces, etc.) Learning how to eat when their "favorites" aren't available. Otherwise, it's hard to develop coping mechanisms in adulthood that you should have developed in early childhood. Praying for more healing for you. God can grow us up in ways our parents never could. 💕
@@BearingMySeoulyou're very wrong. Kids need tough love to realize that they're not the center of the universe. It puts them in their place and also keeps the child from becoming a little imp.
@@CoasterMan13Officialonly if you want to demonstrate to them that losing your temper is appropriate, and appropriate to do to the most vulnerable.
Oversimplifying your situation to: "I never got spanked" --> "I got left behind other kids who did"
Unfortunately it's far more complicated than that. Far more. Perhaps your parents were permissive. Allowed you to do what you want. That's not a helpful parenting style. But it doesn't mean that being assaulted and ashamed in public is good. Firm and emotionally sensitive (authoritative) is the best parenting style. Decades of proper research shows us this.
@@pastorofmuppets8834demonstrating discipline is not loss of temper. The two can be separated.
This needs to be broadcast nationwide and shown in schools. Starting with the teachers!
Not really
It was teachers who first started telling kids they had rights (back in the 70s) to not be spanked. Now kids can do anything to themselves medically without parents knowing and at younger and younger ages. This is not safe.
@@hayleyferguson5284 what on earth has that got to do with assaulting children?
@pastorofmuppets8834 spanking is not assault
@@autumnd.3582 tell that to parents of kids that you hit. Or when an adult spanks you - It's even worse than that, hitting a small defenceless child! Yet you can get criminally charged for that when you do it to another adult.
So yes, it is assault.
In the 80s, I was doing some research, and came across an article against corporal punishment in children. It cited a study published in a medical journal. I went to the study and read through it. What it basically was finding was physical pain creates new neurological pathways in the brain.
(The original article was making the case that you DIDN'T want corporal punishment because of these neurological pathways. )
But this is exactly what you do want.
You want obedience and discipline to be INSTINCTUAL, not based on logic.
If obedience and morality are taught logically, then a child can "reason" their way out of it.
On the other hand, if a neurological pathway has been created, they are going to have a bad feeling when they steal, hurt someone, disobey authority, or destroy property, even when they try to logic it away. They will have a moral compass.
HOWEVER, if you cannot discipline your child without anger, you should never use corporal punishment. Any kind of discipline, whether it is physical, emotional, or even conversational, if it is done in anger it is abusive.
When my daughter was beginning to crawl, I set up a (non toxic) plant, and the lower shelf of a bookshelf with unimportant books and magazines. These were my "training tools."
When my daughter discovered the training plant (it had long viney branches that hung down) and would put her hand out to touch, I'd say no, and move her hand away. I did this many times until she started giving me this look (you parents of toddlers know the look I'm talking about) and reaching her hand toward the plant while she glared at me.
I'd shake my head and say no, don't touch the plant, always in a regular conversational voice, not yelling, not angry, but if she touched it anyway, I gave her hand a little slap. She would cry, and at first when the cry was "why did you do that" I would pick her up and hold her and say, "Mama said no, you can't touch the plant. You have to obey Mama so I can keep you safe."
We would go round and round about that plant (and the training bookshelf) for the next two or three weeks.
My mom-in-law was visiting and watched one of our conflicts that ended up being the last one with the plant.
I sat on the floor near my daughter and every time she touched the plant, I'd patiently say, "no, don't touch the plant." Then when she would give me that look and touch the plant anyway, I'd give her little hand a slap. She would cry, but it would be anger. My mom-in-law kept giving me suggestions like, "I moved everything up so I didn't have to worry about my babies."
(I very much knew this - I was married to her son!)
My daughter and I did that (31 times according to my appalled mom-in-law) until she finally crawled off - not crying, btw - and I never had to get after her about the plant again.
I would occasionally see her crawl over there and reach her hand out, and I'd think, oh no, here we go again, but she would sit like that a moment - almost touching the plant - then pull her hand away and crawl away to one of her toys. That was the move from discipline to self- discipline. She wasn't yet one year old.
I did the majority of my daughter's physical discipline before she was four years old.
She was NEVER disciplined for mistakes - like spilling her milk - or when she was frightened. She was ONLY ever disciplined for disobedience - which means I had given her a rule about it, and she understood what I meant, and she purposely disobeyed.
You should NEVER discipline when you are angry.
When she was old enough to understand reasoning (4,5,6,7 years depending on the child and the depth of the cause and effect reasoning) I would explain that disobedience has consequences.
When she is little, I cause little consequences, because when she gets older the natural consequences for breaking rules can be horrible and life changing consequences that I have no control over as much as I would wish I did.
You have to explain these things almost every year, because children forget, and their understanding changes too, making it look different.
Every child is different. They have different temperaments, different levels of understanding, different motivations.
My son, unlike my very stubborn daughter, was easily disciplined. I could just say, "That was naughty." And he would cry like I'd broken his heart.
Regardless, my kids were never disciplined physically once they were older than 10. If you haven't instilled an instinct for obedience in them by then, you will have to use reason.
Around that time (10 or 12), if it was an issue that wasn't dangerous (like maybe homework or chores), they would say what they wanted to do and I would say, I don't want you to do that, but I'm going to let you decide. They would usually know why I didn't want them to do it and they would try to justify their decision to me anyway. I would say, it isn't going to work out that way, but if you want to try, go ahead, but tomorrow I'm going to say "I told you so, just to remind you that you made a bad decision."
I found that whenever I could, natural consequences at this age, were a much better teacher than me grounding them or trying to lecture them.
They learned pretty quickly to ask for my advice and reasoning when I would say, that's your decision. Lol
By the time my kids were 16 or 17, we had a pretty much adult relationship. I enjoyed their company and was sad in one way, proud of them in another, to see them going out into the world and succeeding.
Self-discipline is a gift you give to your kids.
@jeanjaz 😃 WoW!! TBH my only child is a Senior in College now so I'm VERY removed from this subject matter now. However, I REALLY liked reading about your methods. So much GOOD SOUND REASONING . I'll bet your kids will also be Superb parents as wel -l because of the ways in which you disciplined them - vs. how you punished them. Well done! 😊
You have amazing advice!! I have 4 children and can picture different ones at different points you are mentioning. Thank you for such a beautiful picture and wonderful advice and examples!
That is very amazing advice. I have a toddler now. And soon to be newborn. So I am figuring out my discipline style. Cause I don't want to spank I always feel bad. And my son knows it. 😅 so I have become more firm. Even though he is an amazing child when he is with his grandmother. (No tantrums, no fits or face lol) because I would send him to his room to cool off. And the first time I popped his butt is because he kicked me in the stomach while trying to change his diaper. (He did this out of anger ) and I am now 7 months pregnant so it happened two weeks ago. And I controlled my breath (I had told him to stop kicking in a calm tone at least 7 times) and he got a swift pop on the butt.
But I had to go to triage to monitor the baby cause I was heavily cramping and discharging (no blood thank God) since then my son has not kicked. Still fights the diaper change so we do potty training. I have him take off his diaper and he sprints his little behind to his toilet and once he's done he pats and says "bye bye" to his pee lol and once he washes his hands he lays down for his diaper.
I read this entire comment. Thank you for this amazing advice!
this was like a master class in 4 paragraphs.
i don't have kids, but i so agree with your point. for a toddler or a young child, the emphasis should be on training them to hear and respond to your voice immediately, and obey on command. people always say reason with toddlers. but no, not in the moment. when there's boiling water on the stove, i don't have time for explanations. NO, HOT, Don't Touch. if a car is heading in our direction, MOVE. do it NOW. don't question me when 4 tons of steel is barreling toward you. GO. i can explain later. first, avoid danger.
parenting should be about gradually relinquishing control for their decisions. at first, it is your duty to control your kids. not stifle them, but guide their natural tendencies. then to teach them to make good decisions and how to process that. otherwise, the kid will be emotionally crippled and unable to function successfully as they mature.
i don't even think the problem is parents not knowing how to parent, but not wanting the emotional burden of parenting and disciplining, and training. and not wanting to be responsible for how their child turns out. i'm not sure what they thought they were signing up for.
I can watch John’s stand up comedy over and over. So hilarious and spot on.😂
I'm a teacher. A parent last year told me if his child was misbehaving to throw the book at him. I was tempted at times, but never did. I felt completely supported and his parents continued to support me throughout the year. Parents like this are rare.
As a former school psychologist, I can say that the children of these types of (sadly all too rare) parents had a better prognosis
I was 21 years old and once talked back to my mom. I ended up on the floor with her giving me just one slap. Good Italian mom!! I certainly learned from that. 😅😊
I'm sad to hear that. What a shame to be losing your temper and assaulting any adult, let alone your own son
Sounds like they asked for it 🤷♀️
@@pastorofmuppets8834 Please stop. You have no idea what the difference is between discipline and abuse. Your ignorance is transparent.
@@chelseabarker2250 that's what abusive partners say to those they hit to justify their criminal actions
@pastorofmuppets8834 a relationship partner is not the same as a parent child relationship.
And as I said elsewhere, spanking is not hitting. You're implying a full grown man using his full strength to punch a child. I'm sorry if you were abused as a child in any such manner. That was not right. But that is not spanking either.
I remember when spanking was still allowed in schools...we had a rumor the principal had an electric paddle (whatever that is), but it was enough to keep us out of Mrs. Buckley's office 😂😂
Allegedly our principal had a paddle.
When my stepfather was in school the principal had a paddle hung on the wall with the words "THE BOARD OF EDUCATION" burned into the side!
And now Mrs Buckley is in jail for paedophilia
@@pastorofmuppets8834
Grow up.
I got paddled by my principal twice...in front of everyone! It was so humiliating that I avoided her like the plague for the next 3 years!
I grew up with the "look" and the "chancla". My mom was a single mother with 3 kids in Mexico. She did the best that she could. It drives me crazy to see kids nowadays, no respect at all even in front of their parents.
Im white but spent all my time at the mexican kids houses growing up because the snacks were lit. 🤣 I too know the fear of the chancla. Their mamas didnt care who they hit, if you got caught in the crossfire, too bad. 🤣
@@brianas5624 😂🤣😁
You're right that your mom did the best she could - circumstances sounds very difficult.
It doesn't mean that spanking is a good form of parenting.
As a Skyler, I can concur that we would never.
Lol 😂
😂
🤣🤣🤣👍
🤣🤣🤣
We gotta start saying NO to kids again.
I do everyday. My kids hate me.
I'm thankful my parents disciplined me growing up. All it took was my Dad clearing his throat for me to straighten up.
My family didn't just have spankings. If we talked back to our parents, we'd be given lemon juice. At least, we did, until I made the mistake of telling my mom I LIKED lemon juice. She switched to vinegar.
I got vinegar too!
Much better than spanking
Proud mama of Corporally punished kids. They are the most well behaved kids on the planet. Also homeschool for the win!
MF facts, all around!
Louder for the people in the back
"Proud husband of unconsensually spanked wife and she is the most well behaved woman!" why is your comment somehow better? because it gets that same woman as a vulnerable, helpless little girl instead? if anything that's way way worse.
Your wife is not your child it is not your job to teach her how to behave. Your children are your responsibility. They have no idea how to behave God gave them to you to raise them up the way they should go. Sometimes children need more that a stern talking to.
I hope your wife is an adult therfore she has had a father and mother that hopefully got her butt whooped. I give my kids consequences so the world doesn't have too. My hand is far less scary than the worlds consequences.
@@worshiptimewithax Many millions of people will tell me, your wife is your responsibility and she is under the authority of her husband, he can corporally punish her at his discretion, this was common in countless cultures, including many in biblically times, much of it is condoned in the bible and it's still widely practised in the cultures it was written in until this day, are you concerned about that? do you wish to stop it in those cultures? glad it stopped in yours? if so why? who's to say she isn't the husbands responsibility, you? what do you know those millions don't? is God the authority? do you speak on behalf of him? what do you think about those passages in the bible?
How can a woman know right from wrong without a man's firm hand to guide her? it's not as bad as what the world would do to her etc, it's all BS of course but it's even worse when she's a vulnerable, helpless little girl and receiving the same from her ironically named "protector's/caregivers" who're multiple times her size and strength.
Man I can relate to this. One time I remember Mommy saying, “go up Mamaw’s and pick ye a switch”. I’m 33 years old now, I’ve never been in jail, I’ve had steady employment since I was 17, and now live in my own house with a wife and three children. Most people would think I’ve got my act together but the Left think I’m part of the problem.
This is exactly my argument. Show me the evidence. How am I and all 7 of my siblings decent, productive humans with no criminal record? Is that a coincidence?
Amen
Right? Your mama spanked your behind right away from the penitentiary and the welfare office ❤️
Being employed and not in jail is not a high bar of measurement.
Wouldn't you like to be in the same situation but have never resented your parents? Or never seen them lose their temper toward you?
I can't believe that people think you can't be firm without hitting a defenseless child.
@@Rosie_Cit's decades of reliable scientific research that shows you that you are like this in spite of being physically disciplined, rather than because of it.
I talked back to my mom exactly ONE time when I was ten. She slapped me across the face immediately. I never even THOUGHT about disrespecting my parents again even as a teenager.
Ironically you probably don't respect her for that.
She lost her temper. She assaulted you.
You respect her in spite of that.
@@pastorofmuppets8834 I love it when people who weren't there tell us how we felt about what happened.
Not all of us had a problem with spanking. Get over it. Since spanking became unacceptable, crime rate has sky rocketed, so has mental illness, so has addiction, so has violence in minors. Statistics speak for themselves.
I know some kids hated being spanked because their parents took it way too far, but most of the ones I know who were spanked have no problem with it and feel it made them more responsible adults. I personally was never angry at my parents for spanking me when I know I deserved it, only when I didn't. They usually apologized if they made a mistake. I was also not spanked for every offense, but big ones like stealing, biting, hurting my siblings, etc.
I've heard the argument that 'it teaches kids to hit' a dozen times, but that's not true. I learned how to be violent from watching movies and other kids be violent. But the thought of being spanked made me restrain my temper more.
And no child needs to be 'taught' how to hit. I've babysat kids who know how to bite and pinch their caregivers deliberately who's parents did not use corporal punishment. In fact, every kid I ever babysat who was violent towards me was one who did not get spanked.
The idea of hitting a kid makes people uncomfortable, because it should. You shouldn't enjoy it. But that doesn't make it wrong to use corporal punishment.
That's like saying that putting kids in timeout teaches them to capture other kids and hold them against their will. And I knew parents who wouldn't even do that much. Their kids were the worst brats I've ever met.
People who do not actually have children, or who do not have well behaved children shouldn't be giving advice about discipline. Which is usually the people who call it assault.
@@aslprincess3944 which researcher has concluded that crime rate and corporal punishment have a causal relationship? None. Because it's a myth you make up to try to justify your own bad behaviour.
I am over it, well and truly, with people unable to own their adult temper tantrums towards defenseless children and then having the gall to state they are helping reduce national crime rates.
The opposite happened with me.
My mother slapped me for back talk. I walked out and locked the wasroom door.
I loved and still love my mother
But I couldn't control my anger at that time.
Two wrongs don't make a right.
@@yashodamendiratta4034 I think we can acknowledge that physical discipline, especially slapping, does not work for everyone. But a lot of people appreciate it from their parents. I think you have to know the child, not every person sees being hit as a violation of trust. Some people prefer it to verbal criticism.
I wouldn't say every child needs to be spanked, and I was never slapped, so I can't speak for that, but I don't think I'd have liked it. But calling corporpal punishment 'wrong' when many kids have grown up to appreciate it and think it helped us become better people, seems narrow minded to me.
There's the possibility that many parents don't use physical discipline at the right time also. Not all anger from kids is meant to be disrespectful. This is a complex issue. But spanking does get good results from many people, so I think it would be foolish to rule it out just because some people do not use it correctly.
Another rule of thumb is that parents should not hit kids where it could cause real damage. Spanking hurts, but unless you use a very hard object, it usually doesn't even bruise because of where it happens. Because of all that padding, you won't damage a kid by spanking them usually and the pain is more from it being sensitive than any lasting impact. Slapping or beating on the other hand, will do permanent damage. I've never advocated for people doing that, but spanking seemed very different to me even as a kid from the whipping or beating that people described as abuse.
warnings growing up.." I don't care if we do have company!" and the classic.."I'll give you something to cry about!"
Sounds like you had some pretty angry parents.
He has described my childhood spankings to a tee!
😂My butt just had a flashback. - I am the youngest of 6 children. Once, before I was 10yrs. old, we actually had a 'spanking line' for whatever one of my older siblings did, so the rest of us would know what would happen if we did what he or she did. I am in my 50's now and I still do not know who did what, 'butt' I do remember being the last one getting spanked for it.
@@67MusicLover8 that's very sad to hear
The timing of this video! I watched a 3 year old slap his mom in the face in the grocery store last night. Now I understand how the last 3 years was made possible.
My dad would have come home from work on that one dude!
I do ballet, and one girl in a lower class ... well, she's definitely not dissaplined 🥵 One time she was late for class by ,maybe 2 minutes, and she had a complete TANTRUM!!!! Like, shaking sobbing painful sounding cries, was yelling at her mom, and hitting her mom! She's like 11 or something! She's also very rude to her grandmother and our teacher. It was kinda scary to witness such lacking parental skills, and it's hard because I'm sure her mom is trying her best, but she doesn't realize she's hurting her daughter by not disaplining her
Spanking never went extinct in my house😂 so glad my parents loved me!
Did they? Or did they lose their temper and have no other tools available to deal with misbehavior
@@pastorofmuppets8834 Troll 😃
@@pastorofmuppets8834 you clearly ain't never seen a parent lose their temper, have you?
@@kap849he has. Hitting Means they lost their temper.
When mum gave us "the look" we knew we'd fucked up so badly we started writing our will - I'm not resentful to my parents,I'm grateful,when I see the mess that is my grandchildren I wonder how the hell they're not getting seven shades of snot knocked out of them.
im a 12 years old and i support this 100%
God bless you
If a child has nothing to FEAR, they have nothing to LOSE.
*Maybe 🤔 all the **_Switch Bushes_** went extinct?!?* 😂 😂 😂
My MIL could locate one!😉🤣🤣🤣
@@kerrymartin7557 I *_BET She Could!!!_* 😂😂😅
Mom had a wooden spoon and dad just used his hand. I feared and respected the hand.
Spare the rod, spoil the child”
I've always been against people who think spanking is abuse. Spanking is discipline, full on hitting a kid is abuse. There is a huge difference.
Abuse is a fiction created by the left.
Spanking is hitting
Same, as long as you're not spanking them for the littlest of things and it isn't leaving a negative mental or physical change then it's fine. I'm against gentle parenting, kids have no respect for anyone nowadays
At a family funeral veiwing. My cousin sat down to eat a big plate of food, we were all farmers who worked all and do the chores to get to this viewing. The very moment he sat down his babysitter called his wife "Our kids are being bad, we gotta go." His face died, never even got a bite of food. I looked to my brother and said "If I got that call those boys would be getting a serious whopping witha switch when I got them home."
Me and my brother were in our 40s and we were arguing. My mom quickly told me that she brought us into this world, and she could take us out. We yes mamed very quickly. And we both grew up to be normal, functioning adults.
Doesn't sound very normal to me
@pastorofmuppets8834 ....well neither one of us grew up to be a complete asshole. Unlike you.
I was at a skating rink and there was a line in front of the concession, some preteen boy was acting a fool with filth streaming from his mouth, a lady in front of him turned around and slapped him, then the lady told off on herself to the owner. No cops were called it was a lesson that needed to be learned. Children don’t need to be allowed to act like criminals lest they become them. There is a line between acceptable discipline and abuse. I will say this lady was more a mom to that boy than his parents.
Looking at the state of society and the work ethic and opinions of the young today, its CLEAR someone dropped the ball on spanking. My Dad would wear us out but he rarely had to do it because when he did, it was not something you wanted to repeat.
Yes! My sister and I rarely got spanked, because when we did we didn't want it to happen again 😅 I'm 17 btw. I've never snuck out of the house, and I have a good job so I can pay for my dance classes. The most rebellious things I've ever done have been sneaking sugar to eat and secretly watching shows in bed 😂 it bugs me so much when I see my bro (3) get off Scott free doing things that I would spanked, timeouted, and then talked to.
John, YOU ARE TELLIN’ THE TRUTH & DON’T STOP🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂
I work with kids. I can always tell which ones get spanked at home and which ones don't.
New Gen parents are so non-confrontational that they’ve conditioned themselves to believe they should not instill a sense of authority over their own children, and that parents are supposed to be friends.
That is straight up facts, I don't agree with this new parenting system that is going on at all
My mother had the fastest backhand slap. I'd be in front of her, smarting off. Next thing I know, both my cheeks stung being slapped; first forehand, then backhand. Never saw it coming.
That’s some skill ! 😂
That was my mom with flip flops. We could be in room, not even on the same floor, and we’d get beaned in the head it.
Yes, me and my two brothers were spanked growing up, and look at us now! Married, have kids, jobs, doing great! 🥰😃😊💖
Exactly .. spanking isn’t abuse ..
@beastbombshell3527: I’m not against spanking kids but taken to extreme it CAN cross the line into abuse.
In middle school we had a feminist teacher who LOVED to spank misbehaving boys. The girls she coddled but when she hit a boy she left welts; my friend Joe even had open wounds from the force. This is abuse.
@@Kwildcat13 yes it is. If the OP is doing well it's despite the abuse, not because of it.
@@johnflorio3576 but Jon Crist would say that it's ok, because it's not done enough nowadays
In the words if my dad when us kids and cousins were clowning when we were supposed to be sleeping. “If I have to come up there someone’s gonna get a red hot heinie”! We still laugh about that night, 45 years later. Oh and we went to sleep cause we knew they would do it!
"It was the cold War in my house dude." Yes! I remember that war! Then I learned the art of plugged nose.
What's WORSE, my mom says she never made us try a spoon of EVERYTHING. So sorta swallow, back up, gag, try again or sit there. You will eat what I serve in this house and be grateful! 🤣😂
I came to understand the saying, "like it or lump it." Foods I liked I savored. It was good, delicious food. Foods I did not like I chewed just a bit to be swallowed quick, sometimes whole (lumped it down) so I did not have to taste much of it. I also learned to "save the best for last". I 'lumped' down the vegetables or other food(liver) I did not like first, and then enjoyed the rest of my meal. Oh, and I got dessert! Oh, the times I sat at the table with peas or spinach (or liver) on my plate while everyone else was eating dessert.
Thankfully I never had that, but I wasn't the most picky eater. Chicken Mawkani has been my favorite food since I was like 3😂 (note, I'm a white girl with no sorta Indian ancestors ar all) 😂 My grandma loves to talk about how much I love it😅
As someone who works with kids, I 100% agree with you 💯
You don't deserve to bear near children.
26, growing flowers out of their trunk, and on unemployment. Couldn't be more true. I ubered countless people from this new generation, who said they choose not to work anywhere they don't want to work, and went straight to unemployment.
*Bring it BACK!!!!* 👏👏👏
I remember having to get my own hickory switch. Trying to find the one that might hurt the least gave me time to think about what I had done to deserve it. Of course I’d pick the flimsiest one thinking it would break the fastest but oh no it lasted forever. And if it did break mom would pick up the pieces and go to town with them. Thank you mom because you never whipped me for something I didn’t deserve. And I’m sorry mom for putting you in the position that you had to do that in the first place. ❤️
It's an adult's role to maintain control, not a child's. The child learns either from an unhealthy fear or from the good job their parents do at being in control, of both the situation and their emotions.
"He is today! If he wants a ride home, he's in our family." Buffff 😂😅 I was that kid lmao.
Unreal how relatable this is. I’m dead sometimes with this guy.😂
The complete and total TRUTH! Experienced every one of those scenarios. Me and my 3 siblings are all GOOD citizens making a contribution to the betterment of society, not a detriment. Kudos to John for telling the TRUTH! 😊
On behalf of teachers, John Crist, I thank you.
Snitches get Switches🤣😂
It’s so refreshing to hear him talking about spanking/whooping kids especially in this day & age!! You can definitely tell who got them & who didn’t 👀
Children know nothing about self-control other than that taught by parents and teachers.
Therefore, the mistakes children make in responding to life and their ups-and-downs, can only be accepted in good spirit by parents and teachers, since children have no understanding of what is driving them.
If children want something - they WANT something right away and wonder why they cannot have it. There is nothing more in the minds of children than this. Children see something they like - they want it.
It is cruel to tell children roughly: "No! You cannot have it," their entire system is insulted and assaulted. From earliest babyhood, the training process must be initiated by logic and reassurance - affirming the rights of children to feel secure within their environment. The sense of security of children should be developed by explaining the right way to express their wishes. UNCONDITIONAL LOVE - not irritation or anger, must choose the words which tell children why they cannot have what they want. Children will hear the message when given in unconditional love.
When delivered in anger, it provokes children and begins to take form as resentment - overt or hidden or a sense of deep seated frustration, reducing the natural sense of inner validity of children. Children need to possess this sense of personal validity and should not be subdued or destroyed.
It requires parents or teachers to point out, very clearly, that other people in the world also have their needs, their rights to their possessions, their desire for peace and pleasure. No one, not even children - or adult - has the right to offend another person in order to obtain their own satisfaction!
If another child hits your child and makes him cry, it is only natural for your child to want to fight back - he is programmed to defend himself against the other child.
It calls for parents and teachers to point out that "payback," revenge in conflict, only escalates, bringing more pain to children, and for this reason, "payback" is entirely pointless.
Better to LAUGH and turn away. And rather than allow the irritation and hurt in the mind to continue, better still to take the problem to CONSCIOUSNESS ("God") in prayer and ask for the hurt to be removed from the consciousness of children, and seek a means of reconciliation.
Children should also be taught to take time to understand that all children are equally children born of the Divine Moment. When children are spiritually receptive and can make this procedure of recognizing their spiritual kinship with all children and all living things, and the "rights of children equal with each other," into a habit, they will be given the greatest spiritual gift possible. In such a way, is the selfhood/personality (humanhood) weakened by the practical daily application of unconditional love, while the central "I"ness of children remains strong and self-confident.
Children should be taught the benefits of laughter.
Therefore, skilled and insightful teaching is absolutely necessary to steer children into an appreciation of the rights of all people - EQUAL WITH THEIR OWN RIGHTS.
This is the spiritual law which should dominate the home and the classroom. Any other law by which to judge circumstances is faulty and lacking in balance.
The best teaching will rely - not on the "because I say so" attitude - but on a systematic reference in every circumstance to "unconditional love" and the equal rights of all.
At the same time, children should not be indoctrinated in "self-sacrifice" since this type of caring must be willing and born only of the spiritual perceptions and goals of the individual.
Self-sacrifice is born of spiritual enlightenment, of a higher road to follow, of denial of the selfhood/personality (humanhood) to remove the barriers obstructing attunement with the universality of Consciousness ("God"). True enlightened Self-sacrifice brings a spiritual consciousness to the heights of joy. There is no sense of loss in any form.
If we didn't eat our brussel sprouts we sat at the table until morning🤣!
“Tell us your truth!” 🤣
100% facts! 😂👏 And all the teachers said *AMEN* 🙌
I was rolling, this is so accurate! On long car rides, if we acted up, either my mom would look over into the back seat with a "death stare" or my dad would ask, "Do I need to stop the car?' Once my mom asked Santa Claus to bring willow switches for Christmas. I was so young and tender...and naïve...and thought, "Santa would never do that, because he loves children." Christmas morning, there was a tall box of switches, but my mother never had to use them. Just having the switches there, in plain site, worked to deter bad behavior. Also, I was spanked with my entire first grade class, because someone misbehaved and the teacher asked who it was and no one snitched. Well, I was looking down, doing my schoolwork, like a good kid and didn't even see the offense happening, so I didn't know who did it! The teacher lined up every student in the hallway and gave us all a butt swat! My face was often slapped for disrespect and I experienced my share of spankings, but guess what, I'm a law abiding citizen and a contributing member of society. I'm grateful my parents loved me enough to discipline me, as needed.
One time my mom (a teacher) got mad at me (“I’m going to count to 3, and you better be over here” kind of mad) for using a lower-case i instead of an upper-case I. Can’t remember which grade, but it was sometime in Elementary School
I use that on my brother now😂
So accurate 🤣 my mom was a pro with swinging that pocketbook and hitting us in the backseat if she couldn't reach us didn't even wait for a red light or stop sign!! Single mom raised three respectful children on her own👍
This is so true. My uncle was upset in the car with my cousin and just reached into the back and smacked her, and then realized it was actually me he was hitting 😂 I am not traumatized.
When I was in grade school we moved to a different town for a few years. It was a small town, and we were outsiders. Because of this, I had one teacher that had it out for me. I’d get licks (spanked with a wooden paddle for the younger folks) on a regular basis for no reason at all other than the teacher not liking that we had moved to their town. Yet, despite that so called abuse, I’ve lived a happy successful life. It taught me that life isn’t always fair, and that’s a valuable lesson to know if you want to be happy and successful. Ironically and against his best efforts, he turned out to be a valuable teacher after all, lol.
@@Mountainhippiedudesad it didn't teach you how to stood up for yourselve and others. Blind obedience to authorities. This is what you teach people with spanking. This is not good long term
@@Lovecoffe506 oh believe me it did. That’s why I’m going to stand up to you right now. You would dare chastise someone because , when they were 8 years old, they were powerless against an adult who had complete power and control over them. You would dare to chastise that 8 year old boy because he took that horrible situation he was forced to endure and used it to achieve success in his life. Take good look at yourself! That abusive teacher that repeatedly hit that 8 year old boy? That is you. That is who you are. You want me to stand up for myself and others? I just did.
@@Mountainhippiedude I'm confused. I am against beating. Specially by strangers in schools. It looked to me that you were pro beatings after your first comment and replied to note that beatings does not teach important things. And now you write I am horrible because I want to beat little children... I was severely beaten myself. I am against it.
Funny and true BUT I have seen the other side of this! For two years I had a chart and every time my son did certain wrong things he would go to time out or get a spanking etc. depending on what he did wrong. I was patient, not harsh, firm. The kid DIDN’T change. I am not kidding I did this 100% for 2 years TWO YEARS and he did not learn from it. Thank God we have a close, loving relationship because at age 10 I still have to put him in his place and give him consequences as well as goals and encouragement every single day. ADHD and other things are real and sometimes a kid who behaves badly doesn’t mean they have a negligent parent.
👏👏👏👏👏👏 you are an amazing mother! Never tell yourself you failed, because so long as your trying your hardest, you will always be the best mother for your kid❤
It's true, I have seen it. There have been good parents with strong-willed children. A strong-will just needs to be directed and disciplined like any other, but it requires the vigilance of a soldier.
Yep. My oldest literally LAUGHED during a spanking once. I promise, I'm giving a solid swat to the butt, it wasn't kitten gloves. I was like, "well, where do we escalate from here??" lol
My 2nd child also doesn't change his behavior easily, but we've gotten him to where the "pinch" and a threat of spanking/time out usually adjusts him.
(The pinch is a quick pinch/squeeze to his trapezoid muscle on his shoulder. It hurts, but it's not the end of the world. I use it if he tries ignoring me).
You might want to find out if he has Asperger's Syndrome (a form of autism). My older sister has it and so does my son. My son is way higher up on the spectrum so we didn't even realize until he was 39. It explained so much of why he was so hard-headed and yet tender-hearted at the same time. When we finally figured it out, my husband & I began working with him to help him in the areas he struggles with. And since he was almost 40, he gratefully worked with us.
True, but I still think parents are to blame at least 75% of the time. And imagine how terrible your kid would be if you didn't at least try to discipline him. He would be an out-of-control menace.
Best Crist bit yet😂😂😂
“My brother farted in church, I laughed and got spanked” too accurate 😂 I’m so thankful for the discipline too! Someone above said it- look at me, married, with a respectable job and little son.. Didn’t damage me one bit! 3:08
When my kid was like 10, she told me i cant spank her. I asked why. She said the school would call the cops and put me and her dad in jail. I said good luck finding new parents that care about you.
Another time she said she was running away because i was so mean. So i took her to her room to pack a bag.
She never told the school and she never ran away. And yet, she got spanked when she needed to be.
THANK YOU JOHN!!!! You have helped me to put my thoughts in perspective when I see a kid acting up in public. I want to say SO bad, "they need a spanking!" 😂😂😂
Just because a comedian said it is ok doesn't make it ok
If the kid is exceptionally bad & the parents are exceptionally crap, I DO say it out loud! I just make sure the child doesn't have autism 1st.
There are a number of reasons kids might be acting up in public.
Maybe they are hungry or have autism or maybe something really bad just happened.
Insted of telling the Guardian to spank the child, you should comfort the child insted.
Use your common sense.
@@yashodamendiratta4034 No, you use your common sense. It's true that some kids who act up are autistic or have suffered major trama. However, MOST of the time, the parents are lax and the kids are out of control. I agree that a stranger shouldn't necessarily tell the parent to spank the child. But they should speak up and ssk them to please control their child because they are disturbing everyone else and it is unacceptible behavior. If the parent pushes back, then it's clear thay are one of the crap parents who have created the horrid 40 y/o & under that the rest of us are having to deal with every day.
@@yashodamendiratta4034 unfortunately a lot of people in the comments are just trying to justify hitting children and are looking for any excuse
Honestly, I didn't spank my kids but I also didn't let them do whatever they wanted. They had to sit, or clean, or write me an essay, or they lost tech etc. if they acted up. And if we were in public and someone threw a fit while little, we were out! I've got 3 teens and they are all good kids.
Love this!
Lol that's cool :) I'm not anti-spank, but I believe it should be rare, quick, and done in private.
Thank you for your excellent example. It's so sad that people think that if you have a child that misbehaves they never were assaulted. You can remain in control and in charge as a parent without hitting your kids. This is what the actual research shows us.
Funny thing is,
I, as a kid, love to write essays, sit or clean.
Problem is I have exams now so I can't sit idle.
Oh how I wish to 😂
Btw my mother is not my authority, she is my guide and friend.
People have forgotten who a friend is.
Friends are those who stay with you during your toughest times and show they way from darkness to light.
I must really say make writing a habit. Don't make it like something bad.
My diary is perhaps the most precious thing I own
So you disciplined them without striking them. You did the right thing.
I'm an advocate for whatever works as long and the child knows WHY they're being disciplined/punished. I can't tell you how many times I got "whopped" upside the head and never knew the reason and my mom wasn't a fan of the "why?" question...at all. Now, my kids know EXACTLY why they're being punished...they may not agree (not really looking for an agreement)....but I believe disobedience cannot/should never go unchecked.
Corporal punishment isn't the enemy, but it also shouldn't be the lazy rule.
Good parenting convinces & persuades. Forcing is not ideal .. but sometimes necessary! 😉
same everywhere, I am from Germany and I often do not know who ennoys me most, the spoiled kids or their weird parents who are responsible for this mess
You described my childhood to a tee! There were 4 of us, we had to pull our own switches, strip the leaves, and if my mom didn't think we picked a good enough switch we had to start over again. We grew up to be crime-free, responsible, productive citizens. I spanked my son but I didn't use anything but my open hand. He's a responsible adult as well 👍
Kids at Disney are the worst. After our 3rd trip, my husband said he wanted to start a business. He said parents don't want to spank their kids at Disney creating a bad memory. So his job would be to do it for you. 😂
As a mother of 9, I agree. We took it to easy on our first one (dealing with big issues now as a teenager). The rest have been good old fashioned disciplined and they are much better.
Growing up, my mom's friends were allowed to spank us. One time, i was over a friends house. They got in trouble, i laughed, i got spanked too.
Having been a leader in my church youth group, I concur. I got spanked as a kid and I deserved every one of them. Kids these days don’t get any kind of discipline and it shows. They may not end up in jail but they’ll grow up to be the spoiled, entitled brats as adults.
It's pretty sad that as a spiritual leader to these children that you wish for their parents to physically assault them at home to make your job easier.
Firm and emotionally sensitive (authoritative) is the best parenting style. Decades of proper research shows us this.
You are probably describing permissive parenting, nothing more, nothing less.
@@asanokatana I never cited the author you're talking about. The concept of authoritative parenting is wider and more researched than just one person. I am challenging this toxic belief that bad behaving kids need to be physically beaten. Read through the comments here, it's disgusting what people think Jon Crist is advocating (of note I disagree with his points though he is saying it comically).
There may be, as you say, grounds for responsible physical discipline, but it would be very rare and an exception within the context of authoritative parenting.
@@asanokatana hmmmm a lot of assumptions there. Do you want to compare your training and education with mine? Without trying to boast I had been studying and training in science, medicine, psychiatry, and psychology since 1999. I am very familiar with baumrind's work. I work in the child and adolescent field and am the most senior clinician in both my work places in this space, where the are hundreds of others who also work.
To use your type criticism of me, your argument is like saying Freud did or said something, and therefore the whole of psychiatry supports that to this day.
Baumrind did her research in the 60s. She is not the authority. She used a lot of attachment theory, and many others in her work. Since then millions of hours of research has been done, my own included, and it is as clear as day that physical punishment is not good for children in any circumstances.
You clearly haven't seen the effects of it, otherwise you wouldn't be defending it by citing some researcher, no matter who they are, from the 60s.
To allow people to think they can justify what is often tantamount to child abuse is of grave concern.
It makes me wonder what you do and what level of training and education you have.
Please go and read the rest of the disgusting comments on this video and tell me that the awful loss of temper people are laughing off is ok. It's not. And MODERN research tells us that.
@@pastorofmuppets8834 not even close. A lot of the kids I’ve worked with don’t even get a stern talk. In case you didn’t read my entire comment, I said they don’t get ANY kind of discipline.
@@mcrchickenluvr yes I read that but I also read that you got spanked and deserved it. Inference is that you expect that to happen to the children to whom you are referring, and justifying your own experience with the fact that you behaved better than them.
I grew in the 70s and 80s my mum would give me a few whacks with what ever was close at hand wooden spoon, sandal etc. My dad never hit me or my brothers it was always mum . All the teachers at school carried thick leather straps do instill corporal punishment. A few whacks on the palm on a cold day taught you to not screw around any more. It didn't damage me for life.
I was raised the same way. This is funny & true!!!
As a teacher and a parent I do not believe that violence solves anything. I personally never hit my child or any others and my child is a very successful and compassionate adult. My solution to bad behavior was to give the child some time to think about what happened and then discuss the issue when they were calm. My goal was to never lose my temper and address issues with time outs and listen to what the child was thinking while explaining the issue in a way that they could understand. Children will always test their boundaries as a way to learn what they should and should not do. Our job as parents is to teach them why those boundaries are important.
Finally someone here in the comments with another viewpoint. I agree
Every single word of it applied to my parents and myself when i had youngins.
What makes John so funny is truth. Brilliant & talented!
Preach it!
Just sent this to the family group chat, cause this was our childhood 😅😅😅
My 15 year old was in 2nd grade and I was at work, I get a call from the school “Andrea, Taylor put her hood on and said she wasn’t doing anything today.” I had to take my work truck back to the yard, drive to the school missing work… mind you we are in the country with a very small elementary school with at most some years 18 students from TK-5th grade.. ran by older rancher women. I picked her up and whooped her butt infront of them all the way to the car! I knew they were applauding me when I left the school with her that day. I then called a friend and she made her do schoolwork until I was off at work at 6pm.. she didn’t get by with that and surely never refused to do schoolwork.
"Skyler would never!!!" is perfect
I've gone through different phases with mine, but physical discipline does work for us... no one should be abusing their kids, but a small spanking is not that big of a deal. WILLFUL DISOBEDIENCE is really where they should get a spanking, because that can escalate quickly in a dangerous situation. My friend has kids who never get spankings, and she can't control them when we're out. Multiple times I've had to catch them after they've run into the road -- she's calling for them to stop and they dont listen at all. Meanwhile mine know exactly what they should do, and almost never meltdown in public.
I feel like the same people saying kids should never be spanked are also the ones who complain about kids being out of control in public spaces.
And some spankings should hurt -- kids could LITERALLY DIE if they don't listen in a critical situation. A spanking will not hurt them as much as getting hit by a truck.
Moreover, that's just life... you can love & respect your child, and respect their emotions and autonomy, while still teaching them that the world doesnt revolve around them and actions do often have consequences.
I always choose non-physical discipline first, but there are certain lines and they know where those lines are.
Dude is speaking FACTS.
Imagine rewarding disobedience and wondering why your kids fall away from truth
See, this proves we are more alike than we choose to admit. ❤️💕
Peach tree switches 🤷🏻♀️ Yep, my sister and I had to pick our own. If we brought one back that was way too small, our mom would get even madder and go pick another one herself! 😬😅😅😅😆😆😆🤣🤣🤣
Oh yes, didn’t dare get one that wasn’t good enough. The best was getting to pick one for your sibling.
In my personal opinion, I think it's better if both parents do the spanking. That way you don't have a good cop bad cop situation. It's hard on the bad cop.
so now you have two bad cops.
100% agreed
@@violetnorwen8491 so make it even harder on the kid instead?
you agree it should be communicated to him hitting him or her is unanimously practised all so someone doing the hitting doesn't have it too hard?
No 🙂 I just know to many kids that are given zero disaplin and they are really mean and rude people who aren't going to be functional adults. I just don't want my brother to end up an entitled brat with no sense of self discipline
@@violetnorwen8491 *self* discipline must come from the "self" that's why it's called self discipline, being hurt in someway by someone whether it be spanking/assault, grounding/false confinement, confiscation/theft etc, doesn't cause one through some inexplicable process triggered by the above to develop healthy personality traits or self control, in fact its not a good idea to expose children to pain and violence and humiliation in the hopes of encouraging healthy emotional development and good behaviour, even practises which might minimise the above (or eliminate the violence entirely) like grounding is still really bad for your brain, doesn't help you develop self control and in fact makes you get used to relying on another to control you instead which actually impedes on your self control/self discipline. It also causes them to develop self centered thought patterns and characters by focusing on how their actions will effect THEM and to avoid doing things only to save their own ass, it's called an external morality base and is very damaging, punishment encourages it.
Waiting until dad got home for spanking was the worst
Jaw dropping AWESOME! A REAL talented voice!
Thanks mom and dad for spanking and teaching me respect for others, i stead of staying a selfish, spoiled person. Children today lack love and their hearts wax cold, the world taught them to love themselves, and I remember the two great commandments, and it taught the true way to be happy, love god, and love thy neighbor, and we should love both even more then ourself.
Too true and too funny! 🤣 Thank you for the great joy/laugh! ❤️
Grew up with 8 brothers and sisters all homeschooled driven around in the family 15 passenger ford van. And when he talked about the parents smacking behind and a friend catching some ,”family” fire I freaking lost it. Took me back 20 darn years 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣💀😝. And they are all more then welcome and happy to come to any family event to this day !!
I don't play either. My sister used to threaten my nieces and nephew with "I'm gonna call Auntie" when they wouldn't behave, and they straightened up. I was shocked that she did that. They knew Auntie loved them, but Auntie didn't play with bad kids. Still don't.