The #1 Word That Makes Him Addicted & Attracted To You (Counterintuitive)
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- čas přidán 11. 11. 2019
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This advice is spot on. I have been both of these women. The nice, accommodating, not "difficult" woman got little respect and definitely no lasting love. When I decided to put my feelings first and say NO, stand up for myself when I didnt like something and show that I could and would walk away, is when true love found me. He became my husband but unfortunately he passed away. However, I am now that "difficult" woman and although it sends most men packing, that's good because those are guys who only want to use me and waste my time. Listen to Brian, ladies. The RIGHT man will fall head over heels for you if you stay true to yourself and call him out when he needs it. Self-love and self-respect are the most important values to have in dating. If he's going to leave you because you're not a doormat, he's simply not the right guy for you and probably not for anyone. Let him WALK. Another is RIGHT down the road.
TheVerbalAssassin, you are 100% spot on!
Right, but if you say what you mean, complain and critisize things you don't like, you will probably end up alone.
@@Whoeverwhateverwhenever Maybe that's your reality. It isn't mine. Good luck with that type of low-vibrational thought process. If you don't believe in and know your worth, then yes, you will end up alone, even within a "relstionship". I'll pass. The most important and best relationship is the one you have with yourself. Get your mind right or you're gonna always lose in this game. Peace and Blessings to you.
@@TheVerbalAssassinFAFO well, my reality is that I always say if I don't like something. But they get tired of this and go away. I see that many guys prefer calm women who don't fuck their brain.
Absolutely! I tasted once the nice agreeable one and it send me to hell for 5 long years. Barely got recovered from that place and not without deep scars
Saying "no" is not about controlling or manipulating the situation, it's about respecting yourself and setting boundries and knowing when to walk away.
Are you going through manifestation issues right now contact Cheif divinity to solve your problems.
Whatxapp him.
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Absolutely
Also, don't cancel arrangements with girl friends when the guy you're interested in asks you out.
Yeah... make a man feel that he is the fifth wheel on the cart is certainly a great strategy. Let me tell you: No, it isn't. At least, I want to see the same amount of commitment from her than I am putting into this. You can play it a few times if you think you want to trigger his hunting instincts, but a sane man who not only respects you, but also himself, will only take it a few times, then leave.
@@linuxpython935 Why should someone cancel plans they already had because YOU asked them out? That is what she is saying. Don't cancel plans you already made because someone asked you out. If you can't manage to accept that, then why are you worth dating?
@@gusmonster59 I am not saying that she should always cancel her plans, but in my opinion, taking the other party's interests into account is important to get along. If one side always makes other plans independently of their spouse, that's a recipe for disaster. If a lady would do that to me, I would definitely conclude that I am sort of a dessert to her, but not nearly as important as she should hold me, if she wants me to trust her that she'll stay around, and if she wants me to stay around. Conversely, I would also try to accommodate her interest to some reasonable degree, so we would both have our girls or guys night out independently, but we would also have occasions where we would cancel other arrangements - because for me, family comes first, everytime. If she can't be that committed, I am probably glad to get away from her rather sooner than later.
Yes amen
Linux Python I agree. I'm 65 so I've seen a few things. A woman's friends are her friends until they 1. move away, which happens to almost everyone or 2. find their own man. 99% of the time, female friends aren't going to be there 5 or 10 years from now. Why would a woman pass up the opportunity to create her own family? That's self-defeating. As wise women say to their daughters, don't listen to your friends; they'll make sure that you lose (or never get) your happy home.
So the message i get: "don't fall in love before He falls in Love with you first"
Idk why but this message just inspired me
I always tell my friends that or He NEEDS to love you more
I like to be true to myself , to my feelings, if i am falling I am not trying to hide! It s good to let your feelings be known ...
Then I could see how he react toward me. And be prepared for whatever come out.
Similar advice appeared in Pride and Prejudice about 200 years ago. The more things change, the more they stay the same.
@@edennis3202 obviously, humanity has been the same...
Saying no is powerful. It teaches people how to treat you and shows respect for yourself. The hardest thing is saying no when you want to say yes but you know you would be disrespecting yourself in the long run.
Stay strong because some day you will look back and be thankful for that” no”.
I always said, "If you wouldn't let one of your friends get away with it, why would you let a man get away with it?" Thank you Geert!
Normally when a woman stops loving her partner that's the time he's ready to give her all the love that she no longer needs. I guess this is so because she develops the strength and courage to say 'no' and also ignores him. It does work but only when the ladies already given up on the relationship.
This was precisely my experience.
saying no will make him go away from u? not attract him as said in the video
@@trishadash9938 Saying no will make him doubt everything and start reevaluating everything he knows. Even the most attractive and high self esteemed guy will do that. Their train of thought is usually "why isn't she calling me back?", "why doesn't she want to spend time with me anymore?", "why doesn't she love me back?". Trust me, every time I decided to ignore and reject a guy I spent to much of my time and effort into, they came back crawling, like lost puppies who just wanted a minute of my attention. It's exhausting and "fake", in my opinion. But they never wanted my genuine self, my open and honest self. It seems they like mind games. Ugh.
@@iulia.bianca.b if your genuine honest self is mostly rebuffing a guy that you claim to like, then you really don't like that guy. The whole idea behind saying "no" sometimes is based on a man behaving badly. Maybe he's tryna get you to open a line of credit to help him pay for something. It doesn't have to be sexual, you should say "no" to that and examine why he needs it or can't do it himself. If you really don't feel like being sexual, then say not tonight. But, do let him know that you still love and desire him. Or, to take all of the confusion about sex away, wait until he marries you. Men are the gate keepers of the relationship and women are the gate keepers of sex. We want what the other has so the power struggle is real. I read a ton of stuff and I'm not getting the idea that women truly want marriage any more. It seems to me that they just want sex partners like men. So, there's really no power struggle to be had if everyone just wants uncommitted sex. But, if you suddenly want a viable relationship with a dude you've been sexual with, and you start power struggling, then expect to fail in that relationship.
My point is this, women at the very minimum, should demand a monogamous relationship with a man before she agrees to sex. And, it's ok if you even want to wait until marriage. But, if you think you can start off playing sex games before any real commitments happen, then you're being foolish.
I just find this very interesting. I find it very hard to love someone who don't love me right back. Typically when someone don't love you they stop asking you to fulfill their needs and they stop fulfilling his needs. That means "time to go" in my book!
The man I'm dating, I'm doing exactly what you are saying & I tell him I won't put up with "that" & he's making me pull away from him. He tells me he's afraid of losing me & apologies & respects my boundaries.
After 2 bad marriages with narcissists I will never again just be just a pleaser & I will never again be with a man who doesn't truely value me.
Arminta Nelson good for you! Yes!
RUN
Wow, hiw didn't you come to avoid the second narcissist?
Amen.
Well done girl!! 😁 X
Right on advice. Being a pleaser sends a wrong message. Lesson learned only too late.
nacardelmar Right. That's why Nice Guys strike out with you Chicks.
Me too
It's never too late...😉
@@midnighttarot3161 thank you for that. I was people pleasing for 23 years and seems they run after me when I finally walk away.
So glad I came across this video, just wish it was sooner. Was in a relationship for 22 years and was a people pleaser. Than met my twin flame and also was a people pleaser for 2 years and finally have put up boundaries. He keeps trying to test them now and I'm no longer allowing it.
Holy crap!!!! You are so right!!!! When I felt romantic love was superficial, focused on my kids and my career, men who were interested never seemed to lose interest for years. No matter how often they were rejected! When I decided I want to be in a relationship and found a guy I was interested in, after several dates I found myself becoming this insecure, needy, frankly an embarrassing version of myself that I didn’t recognize. Very unattractive! My life was full without a man it should remain full with a man..... happy me happy man
I hope everything is well for you, but I just want to let you know "holy crap" is insulting to God
Wow, I wish I had heard this advice years ago. I set boundaries with my first ex, but then he pushed them and pressured me, and I gave in. It turned out to be an abusive relationship, and I didn’t leave until 3 kids and 13 years later. Did the same thing with the 2nd. Finally, I’ve gotten free, have had counseling and a lot of inner healing, and I’m trying to learn how to enter the dating world again. He’s right, ladies. Set those boundaries early on, and stick to them. If you’re insecure, you don’t value yourself, and you let these men control you, predators will smell that from miles off! Get counseling and help before you think about starting a relationship. Wish I had. ❤
"Don't let that in-love you sit at the wheel in your lovelife. She's supposed to be the passenger". Love it!
I don't agree that
Are you going through manifestation issues right now contact Cheif divinity to solve your problems
Whatxapp him.
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To me, a good relationship doesn't require games. It should be easy to communicate. If it's not and he won't open up to you, move on!
Agreed
Exactly. Why all the mind games?? One minute they like you the next, they don't want to know. Can't be a people pleaser, but please your man so he don't stray. It's too much, lol. Show love don't show love. When does it end, when two people can truly just treat each other with love all the time. Not too much to ask for is it.
Word
Games are for immature idiots
Truth
I agree Brian, I will not compromise my body,my faith, or morals for any man!! and he knows now that I am not afraid of losing him!! my mama taught me that.... "another bus is always coming"
Love it
The guy I like called me a snob and judgmental for taking a strong stance. I said if he doesn't like to hear my thoughts he should stop talking to me AND I walked away. Guess who sought me out repeatedly a few days after? ;)
The only men that like push overs are abusive type.
Wish I could give you two thumbs up. Couldn’t agree more.
Well said❗❗❗❗❗
Run. He's not respecting your boundaries.
Totally agree
Just for the record, I’m a pretty ‘hard-ass’ sort yet I married (& divorced) a sociopath. True the ‘pushovers’ are the ones abusive people flock to, yet a trait the sociopath deems worthy is what they prize. I am strong-willed which he wanted to be (told me all the time it’s what he loved most about me.) A sociopath feels they can ‘acquire’ traits from people. Just to say, abuse can happen to anyone used to abusive people in their lives (unhealed childhood trauma, for me.) If there’s a crack they will find a way in.
Edit : The first comment he made to me when we met, ‘You’re a bitch’, bc I voiced my strong stance. We were just acquaintances for 5 yrs then dated. My point being he waited for 5 yrs, dated/engaged for almost 2 yrs, literally the day we got married the abuse began. I know you won’t take my advice & that’s ok, but here’s the seed I’m planting for you. GO & don’t look back.
The one for you will show LOVE, not hate, when they first meet you.
I’m in a relationship now with a man I genuinely shot down in the beginning. I was genuinely rude because I had my children with me, had just gotten off work and was tired and in NO MOOD to talk to “some random dude”...I now get a real man outta this dude. He goes above and beyond for me without me asking him for anything at all...I’m so in love with this man now too💯❤️🥰
☺️ Just remember to keep the attitude from the time you didn't love him
I'm glad for you 😊. But my gut feeling tells me no he doesn't want anything else no dinner nothing I feel he doesn't put out I not putting out it crazy my second husband I put out with him we did marry he live 9 yrs together before he died he was the best. I love his so. But my gut feeling tells me no on this one I think he might be married or something thanks
@@debramiles5176 , always trust your intuition when it tells you something is off. Wise woman! ☺️
This is so true. I was the nice one, to the point of putting up with too much crap..hard to be a b--ch, I guess! So, "you will always be there for me"! Taken for granted.. now I am older, know better. But, if I knew THEN what I know NOW! Wow!😊
Yayyyy 🔥
I told my boyfriend I wouldn't be in a relationship as the only giver. He's been all in ever since. =-)
I'm sincerely happy for you! I will try!
The gentle Nympha I think the secret not so secret is self love. You need to carry it with you in every situation. It doesn’t mean you don’t have bad days and experience and emotional break down every now and then. You just learn to love yourself where you are at. You will attract more of the right type of people, and be choosey enough to say no. Don’t overlook any personality flaws you know you cannot live with. Let a man treat you right, because you deserve it.
@@misskat7437 Thank you for the advices. But I'm really broken and I don't have any strength to react. It was nice of you by the way.
Girl you are the woman you shouldn't be giving him shit in the first place🙄
You need a CZcams channel lol❣️❣️
I once had a guy I’d been dating for about four months ask me, “if someone asks you to sign a pre-nup before marriage, would you do it?” His family was fairly wealthy. My response was, “No. I don’t start a marriage by planning for the divorce.” He was shocked and his cousin fell over laughing. I added, “If you feel you need to ask a woman to sign a pre-nup before marrying her...then stop. You’re not marrying the right person.” I broke up with him a month later and he did go on to marry a beautiful woman and he didn’t ask her to sign any papers. They’ve been married twenty-five years.
Good for you. He is not the right man the.
Are you going through manifestation issues right now contact Cheif divinity to solve your problems.
Whatxapp him.
+ 2 3 4 7 0 1 3 8 3 6 9 3 7..
Every marriage comes with a pre-nup, it’s just one that’s pre-defined. Any financial planner will tell you: get. A. Prenup. Custom. Made. It’s not preloading for a divorce, it’s about securing your financial future no matter what.
I am a student of this lesson indeed. No really works. I used to be so accommodating. Then the blinders came off of my eyes. He was taking full advantage of my kindness. I turned it off and turned the situation around. Now, he chases me.....Love it.
Same thing happened over here!!
How did you change the situation
@@margaritaborisova8165 I started saying no when I was saying yes to things that I didn't agree with. I showed him in the kindest way that I have boundaries.
Always maintain your high standards. Don't compromise your morals and values.
learn to say NO!
This is how a man learns to respect you
This is how you respect yourself.
This man is the god of relationships. He knows exactly what he is talking about and it works! Relationships are work, hard work. It's our thoughts and actions (or lack thereof) that makes or breaks a good relationship. Those who say they don't want to "play games" are too lazy to afford a successful, long lasting relationship. There is no "magic pill" to a successful relationship. If you find the love of your life, it's worth the effort. But do take the time to love yourself first... This is the key to success in all aspects of life.
If a man isn’t willing to lay his life down for you, don’t give him access to your mind, body, or soul. We as women ARE the PRIZE. Show it, live it, and don’t feel bad for saying “NO”. Sometimes, showing a man that you’re serious will make him realize you are Queen. If you keep letting him have his way, and allowing him to be disrespectful to you he will continue the same behavior. Love yourself first, allow God to be in control, and everything else will fall into its rightful place. Love & light Queens! 💫❤️
This is a really great message, Brian. We women need to watch this a few times and let it sink in. Who we "really are" is a person worthy of being loved. We need the real "us" to stay in charge of our love life at all times.
The in love version of us is WEAK 😅💯 that version should always be the passenger! Love this 👏🏼
So basically act like u don't give a shit anymore
What I realized after this video is that I totally ruined a relationship I might have had, and I think there’s no way back. We do talk sometimes, and he shares his life events with me, but it’s nothing like before. And this is the person who made me SO happy, whom I love wholeheartedly ( not the “ I have butterflies while looking at you” kind of love. More so” I want to spend my life with you” kind of love). Just, by nature I am someome who always tries to avoid dissappointing others, to avoid conflicts, and was never thought to have “ bounaries” with people.
I have learned now, I feel like I have growm a lot since we split. But it’s just so sad fo realized I’d ruined everything by just not being strong enough.
We all grow over time; it's part of being human. Maybe you two will end up together again; maybe you will end up with someone even more amazing. Keep moving forward, and expect the future to bring you delightful surprises. 🙂
Love this!!!! So true!!!! I have experienced this, and I was just talking about it today with a friend. When we as woman lose the fear of losing a man, he will step up his game. I used to be the type to always please him, and then I finally set my boundaries, he started coming off to me. Sadly for him, I was over him. I think the key here is to learn to love yourself first, this shows others how you should be treated.
Honestly I think the best advice in a relationship is space which is basically saying no and doing your own thing for a couple of hours or days. Also Allow them to learn the real you. That's how you know if they can tolerate you or not. Always hold yourself back until both are ready.
My thing is I have this thing called the 6 month rule...which is something I don't break because before I give up the goods he needs to PROVE he LOVES me
Men will wait for years. Ths rule stinks. If he commits then it’s ok.
What are your requirements for him to prove his love for you?
Yeah always been a pleaser and giver.Learning about boundaries. Not caring about the "progress" of the relationship is the key..Living with uncertainty and getting on with your own life..Being happy with self..Think friendship is important first..Let it develop naturally, not forced.
Thanks yes
I'm remembered my past relationships & my mistakes, thanks for enlightening me, now I know what I did wrong. That's why people say to Love Yourself & now I fully understand why.
It was a very important message - thank you Brian 😊
I have always been so submissive with men I liked, I wasn’t myself at all... and the relationship never worked out or I would get taken advantage of. I still don’t know how not to be submissive but I know I need to change and build in strong boundaries and a life I love
I apreciate your words. When one starts being "Unavailable" and show that you have had enough, makes him think about his actions. That he has not given value! Be your true self.
This is what I needed. CONFIRMATION! You have made me a very happy woman! I sometimes forget just how much power the word "no" has. And I will continue to set boundaries. I'm no pushover. And "he" knows that by now. Thank you!!!!
Let me just apply this to the fictional relationship in my head
; )
Yes, you should, you'd be starting to adapt the idea of self value and with practice comes experience, helps you prepared for real life events
Same 😂
Are you going through manifestation issues right now contact Cheif divinity to solve your problems
Whatxapp him.
I went out with two of my female friends. After about an hour and a half I had to tell them this,.."please tell me why we are three grown women and we just wasted an hour-and-a-half talking about guys that probably aren't even thinking about us. Why are we wasting our time is there nothing else to do is there nothing more to life what is your passion do you have hobbies what is the deal?? we are smart intelligent beautiful lovely strong independent women why are we talkin about stupid crap!?"
Getting your fish poked is the only thing legit nothing else matter don’t you know this by now ladies
You are so correct. I really for someone and completely changed myself the after 17 months I said no to what was always a yes and he dipped out the same night. I dodged a bullet and learned a very valuable lesson!
This makes sense out of what I am going through RIGHT NOW. I started prioritizing what I did and letting him know I'm not gonna jump when wants my attention, he's more attentive now and saying things that shows he wants me around more instead of tippy toeing what he admits.
YESSSSSSS new one of you youre the best ~I really wish it was weekly!
Thank you Brian for this wonderful reminder! I greatly appreciate your candor and insight. You’re one awesome man!
The best ever!!!! Saw it twice. #1 FAV and
BIG THANK YOU,
Blessings, Suzay
Thank you so, so much, Brian. I am going through this very issue right now. You're helping me to stay strong!
Thank you Brian!!! Love to listen you!! So helpful! And makes me almost cry!
Hands down one of the best videos of this description that I have ever experienced. Thank you, and so very well said :) 🙏🏼❤️
Thank you, this is exactly what I needed to hear!
I love how you helped me understand that it's not a bad thing to be myself when in love with someone. I used to think that being myself with him would scare him off quickly or even slowly so with that being said I put up with his shameful behavior. The ghosting, the ignoring, the one word text, or the "Hey you busy" text. He would treat me beautiful in front of my friends and his friends and my family ... but when we were apart he was a whole different person? Treated us like we weren't a couple. I wouldn't hear from him for hours then it was days then weeks then months? Then when I'd decided to move on he'd come back, treat me beautifully once again but it all starts up again. So it's time I be myself and put an end to this bad behavior and receive my happiness. I need to stop tolerating this kind of behavior.
To be fair, you can't even really be in a relationship with someone else if you're not yourself. What that means is that the other person is in a relationship with a fake person because you're not really 'you', and you lose yourself. You should always want to be loved for being you, for being who you are, exactly as you are, and the only way to do that is by fearlessly being yourself. x
This was brilliant, thank you.
I really appreciate you, Brian!
Thank you Brian for your words of wisdom. Great advice!
Hi Brian 😃 it was nice to hear you back after a long time ! And you know what... following your suggestions proved very useful !!!
Sir, this is absolutely TRUE!!!!!
Makes so much sense and I’m taking your words to heart.
What you said is a very good approach to also loving and appreciating yourself first.
Wow ... had no idea that I was doing this right ... lol
Needed to hear this one !!
Thanks for the validation 💯‼
Awesome advice! I wish I would have found you sooner! I can't wait to watch more of your videos...Thanks for awesome advice! Blessed to have found you☺️
This makes a lot of sense to me, and starts the relationship out with much-needed honesty.
Omg I love you Brian.
Thank you.
So valuable, addresses exactly where I’m at right now. Devouring your videos and will be looking into your books and podcast!🙏🏼💜🙏🏼
Good morning Brian, Love your coaching style 😎🥰💋
You are amazing! I can't thank you enough for opening my eyes! I am so thankful that I have found your videos in the most difficult time in my life! You managed to calm me down, prevent my panic attacks from bursting out and make me understand his actions!
Thank you for sharing your wisdom, Brian!
Things are looking so much easier after watching your videos! Thank you!
I really love your calm and loving manner in your videos!
Greets from Germany :)
The best and simple advice out there! ☺️👍🏻
I needed this Video!🙏🏻💯Thank You so Much!!! ❤️
Absolutely, precious message. Thank you. Keep up, you are doing really good.
Thank you! This advice came just at the right time.
Very important message at the perfect moment. Brian, I said no again today and I meant it again today! It is hard recovering from co-dependency. But your video today was just golden. We will get better. Yes.
It really works. Your videos are valuable and help a lot of people who don't know how to handle the situation they are going through. Thanks a lot for making the video for us. I always wait for the next upcoming video. Keep it up. Good job👍
Speachless! Absolutely true! Wow! Thank you!😊
You have refined and structured ideas about relationships, a higher/deeper level that makes you a real king. I love your videos!
Yes, thanks for sharing this.When we women know who we really are we can set boundaries in our lives, and the word NO will be one of the most effective words we can use.
This was excellent. I had boundary problems in the past. Your explanations are extreme! Thank you! 💚
Brian, you're the man!!! You're funny and absolutely candid. And...you make heaps of sense. Very practical advice. Thanks. You rock.
I love this. Thank you for your advice. I'm enjoying your videos and you come across as genuine. I think I've finally found my guy and we're clear about not playing games. It's interesting that this relationship is showing the most turmoil in the first few months and yet I'm the most certain about him. I set my boundaries and though I'm usually pretty easy going, I'm also not afraid to say "No" when it comes to something that doesn't work for me. And he is the same. I guess I've finally come to the age where I'm just tired of playing games and not afraid of saying, "Next" should it not work out. And it's working out. Thank you again and keep making great videos!
That falling in love is Twin Flame love. Twin Flame love is simply amazing.
That doesn't exist. Keep dreaming
Oh I love this video and exactly what I needed to see. This is like an affirmation for me atm. Thanks Brian.
You are the best relationship expert. Thank you. And I like the honesty in your words.
You have a wonderful way of explaining things with gracious simplicity. I appreciate you. And yes, I totally agree with you. I have found this all to be true. It isn't always easy - especially when you want the relationship so much, but this is essential!
one of the best videos I have watched on relationship advice!!
I really appreciate your wisdom shared. Thank you very much once again, Mr Geert!
I have been both people too and not realized it! What an epiphany. Thank you Brian for making this so clear!!
Thank you for this valuable advice 💙
This was AMAZING!!!! One of the top 3 advice videos I've ever seen. This is spot on and HUGE for women. For me right now, this gave me the courage to just be me. Thank you
Wow!!!!!!!! I never ever thought about it like this! Thank you!!!
Hi and thank you very the bottom of my ❤️ for all of the necessary masculine advice! I have come realize I did not understand men as well. I’m totally binge watching on your channel👍
True: being able to say no is really important! Thank you for reminding us! 😊
This is on point!! Boundaries are so important!!
love your videos, Brian! Thank you so much!
Brian Knox is bad ass! Thank you for all your advice
So true! You validated what I did over the weekend. Thank you! And he is pouting right now. 😀
Exactly the same here (did it on sunday 😁). We're not affraid to rock the boat, are we?
This is the realest video out there 💯😍 wow
I could hug you Brian. This made so much sense, like a missing piece of the puzzle. What you said, it's true. I've heard others attempt to explain this but were not impactful. You were thorough, so thanks much! ♡
Perfectly said Brian. Thank you!
When you’re in a relationship 6 months on thanks to this god! Thank you !! I still watch your stuff though! ❤️
EXCELLENT!!! A simple yet Powerful Truth!!! "NO"...💯🎯
This is absolutely TRUE. Past experience has proven this.
I love you Heath for making me understand things nobody really talks about 🙌🏼
I love your videos and I want to get your books soon ❤ You are one of the few male dating coaches I trust. I love how you explain everything with so much depth and intellect. You really provide an analytical insight into the behavioural patterns of human nature.
You make more sense than most of those love gurus on CZcams.I love hearing what you have to say..
Wow! Thank you Brian. Great confirmation that I am doing the right thing. Even tho my man sometimes thinks i am just "being difficult".
Valuable words. Thank you!