Batman's War on Hate Crime
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- čas přidán 17. 05. 2024
- Batman get's a call from Commissioner Gordon with news that his fight against crime has just expanded BIG TIME. How will he handle it? Not well, these are parodies. You knew that. It's gonna go comedically wrong. Again, you knew that. Silly goose.
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Btw these are AI upscaled images, not AI art :p
It’s really sad that Generative AI has become so prevalent that stuff like this has to be clarified now.
Hi JJ, 0:09 “Aggrement”
The reason that people mistake them for each other is actually that Generative AI images are typically upscaled at the end of the process, so a few of the visual indicators that people interpret as being "AI Art" are actually just indicators of AI upscaling. (But many of them are actually indicators of generative AI trash)
@@PosiWritesStories AI upscaling is also a form of generative AI, in fact AI art algorithms stemmed from AI upscaling ones.
Why do you guys bitch and moan about AI when it's used like this? It isn't hurting anything.
"Segregation among races is a horrible ideology in both theory and practice."
- Evil Batman
I mean... At this point...
@@Infernal460No, stop, don't do it man...
There a video of German man going to different parts of the world and loves all the people he meet. But when his lify hood and country gets flooded by the same group of people he meets, he goes full Hit and says I wasn't racist but the fail politcan made me this way.
it's all coming together now.
@@Infernal460 y'all getting way too comfy
Batman explaining birth to Robin has to be one of the most out of place things but makes sense at the same time
he'd rather have the awkward sex talk with Robin then explain how he's not bigoted because his villains are mentally ill
Alfred, give birth to robin 😎
I think it’s a defense mechanism at this point.
@@The_Jumping_Box "But master Bruce I... Very well sir."
Alfred begins the process, because that is his job.
Most Batman villains ARE mentally ill, but the majority of mentally ill people are NOT Batman villains... yet.
not that they'd tell u
sounds to me like the mentally ill are just not trying hard enough
Batman is mentally ill can’t commit a hate crime against what you are
A lot of them are their own worst enemies though.
@illbeyourmonster1959 you're your own worst enemy harvey
I read the title as Batman’s war crimes
Both are accurate
True
Glad I'm not the only one lmao
If it was, this video would be hours long.
yup, exactly what i did, boy was i suprised by the video
Luckily that pharmacy hired Harley Quinn to take care of all the Arkham patients
💀💀💀💀
🤨
She can take care of me bruh
And if tries something violent i can handle her easily,i am 260lbs bro
And everything comes down for Harley when The Joker, of all Arkham patients, explains how he got his scars.
Unironically, I'm pretty sure she's qualified. She was licensed before the whole "Joker's punching bag" thing, right?
Robin just being a guy in his 30s Batman constantly treats like a child is the funniest thing to me
Robin's basically just Barnacle Boy at this point.
Mermaidman would approve... Course, I'm pretty sure this has resulted in Barnacleboy going rouge once, and a few Robins hitting their edgy phase.
Robin said in a previous video that he's 25.
How's that even possible? Shouldn't he have become Night Wing and passed the Robin mantle to younger kids?
20s*
"We wouldn't categorize that as a targeted prejudice right?"
1:43 catagorize*
@@andrewmat no
@@andrewmat No, actually you're wrong here. Even though that spelling is closer to how you say it. English isn't a phonetic language even though it might seem like it on the surface.
They shouldn't cause batman targets them for terrorism on the city.
@@andrewmat cetegorize*
Batman isn't wrong. That blinker blinked.
Lol
Typical blinker behaviour, can't trust em i tell ya
Hey man, don't use the hard R.
@@piplupfan5106 Only blinkas get to use that word!
@@3lloGuvner Why are you so Blinkist?
The call from Robin's perspective:
Batman: Hold that thought Robin, someone's calling us on the Bat-Phone! // Hello Commissioner. What seems to be the problem?
Batman: That's great
Batman: Of course, whatever I can do to help my men in blue
Batman: ...Yeah no no--I'm right here. I just- I- think you need to be a little bit more specific.
Batman: I mean aren't all crimes technically hate crimes?
Batman: What's that?
Batman: Oh. Yeah I don't wanna get political...
Batman: Fine, fine, alright, how bad is it?
Batman: What and they don't?
Batman: Well that sounds like it kind of resolved itself.
Batman: Did he happen to leave a riddle? A riddle. Did he leave a riddle at the scene of the crime? Or, or sheet music? Or a flower? Something that would lead me to the next clue?
Batman: Then I got to be honest with you I'm stumped.
Batman: Speaking of which commissioner, can I ask you something off the books?
Batman: Well it's just that all this talk about _hate crimes_ and you know, people getting targeted for being minorities, uh, just got me thinking -- w-would you consider the mentally ill to be a minority?
Batman: Well I'm just going down the list of my rouges gallery and I'm realizing that most of, if not all of them are severely mentally ill. I mean it's getting to a point where they opened a pharmacy in Arkham. Well I was just there the other day, I'm having problems with my--you know what let's not talk about that. But uh-we wouldn't categorize that as like, a targeted prejudice, right?
Batman: Commissioner?
Batman: Fuckin' Blinker.
Rogue is a bad person. Rouge is a colour. People in this comment section need to learn how to properly discriminate between colours,.... wait a second....
@@keithklassen5320 Mrs. Anne-Marie Lebeau would be to differ that "Rogue is a bad person" /jk
Ah English, thanks again for having so many sets of words with the same spelling but different meanings
@@jmm394Blame the French for that one.
@@jmm394 Ro-gue and Rou-ge are spelt differently.
Batman: I am a victim of a hate crime!
Mr Terrific: That's not what a hate crime is.
Batman: Well I hated it!
If you use the definition provided in this video, it actually was a hate crime.
“Billionaires are the most persecuted minority on earth” -Billionaire Bruce Wayne, probably.
Hate crimes are crimes that I hate
@@Wertsir More like the most powerful minority that commits the most hatecrimes. Except for bruce of course. He's chill.
@wertsir
would orphans be a minority?
Batman : i fight in the dark
Racist: i fight the dark
Edit : didn't think my joke was that funny but thx I guess 😃
NO
Batman: I fight the darkness of society
Racist: I fight the darkness of society
@@FungusFindersBewarewhy not?
Sora: ok twitter let me explain
Badass
I’m gonna start calling people “blinker” and provide absolutely no explanation as to what it means.
Okay, breather. You go breathe your breaths now.
Please refrain from using the hard R, my blinka
Trying to goat people into thinking you are using a slur/ insult against them is the dumbest 13 year old shit. Say it to the wrong person and your going to get throat punched before you have time to explain the joke.
@@MMAddict39 He was just out for a jog, doing nothing wrong.
Well it is self explanatory
You damn blinker
Batman, you don't beat up mentally ill, you fight criminally insane. You've said that yourself.
"Criminally insane" just sounds like a subcategory of "mentally ill"
Just remember that mental illness does not justify hurting others and Batman is fully justified in bringing a stop to them
The difference between Batman and most of his rogues is that he's insane while they're criminally insane. And only one of those is prosecutable.
Well on his defense he tries to stop them, not harm them in any way
@@olliegoriatechnically it is. being criminally insane means someone was so mentally ill, they couldn't know that they were committing a crime. It's often used in insanity pleas.
And some of them are, like pyg. However, while most of Batman's criminals are intensely mentally ill, it doesn't mean he isn't justified in stopping them. After all, their still holding a fucking gun, maybe Batman wouldn't have to beat the shit out of them if Arkham did its fucking job or the state finally gave a few the death penalty. You'd think the insanity plea would stop working after crane and jokers 3rd act of chemical warfare
I love how each of these videos just open to Batman explaining how babies are made to Robin. Maybe the next one should have Batman explaining it to either Batgirl or Commissioner Gordon.
It would be even funnier if he explained it to them at the same time
@@eneasantoni1181To the father and daughter duo. 😅
Batman:And that is how babies are made
Gordon:Batman I’m a grown man with a wife and a daughter of course I know how babies are made
I like the implication that between videos he's just constantly explaining it to him now
@@TreyC68"Well then let me teach your daughter, whom i have a completely platonic and professional relationship with 👁️👄👁️"
I'd have to imagine that in a world of still images, people who can blink would be in the minority.
thats actually real clever
"Batman, when I'm taking about 'hate crime',"
"Sample text"
Fucking blinkers man, they're everywhere
Good on Batman for not taking shit from a blinker
“And that Robin is how babies are born.”
He’s still giving that explanation?!😂
“Well Robin let me try to explain. You see, when a man and a woman lover each other very much.”
Judging from the end of the video, it seems that he just starts explaining it again any time Robin asks a question he doesn't want to answer.
Dammit Gordon! Batman’s expertise is super villainy, not reguler crimes!
His parents were killed in a regular crime and kinda the reason he’s batman
@@Deathmare235It is kinda ironic how most of the time we see him fighting supervillains and trying to stop the world or the universe from ending instead of preventing the same sort of crime that killed his parents from happening.
"Hate crimes" are more often than not "non crimes", more like "someone said hurty words and I want to frame him with a poorly defined law".
don't even get him started on the regulest crimes
@@GiacomoSorbi lmao?
"F#$%ing blinker." 😂😂
0:35 "Every video you get a little dumber"
I couldn't pay attention to the video after that XD
"Fucking blinker" is absolute gold!
God that Robin voice is spot on
0:36 Gordon was so shocked by Batman's idiocy that he reverted back to his sample text
Call Scooby Doo batman. He solved all his cases already
My fav Flash moment is where batman is interrogating one of Flash's villains violently and Flash instead sits down and has a drink with him and reminds him that he's off his meds. His villain didnt even realize he put his villain costume back on. After he finishes his drink he turns himself in. Mental health hero king
you think blinkers are bad well let me tell you about breathers they are the absolute worse walking around breathing on stuff, taking oxygen without paying for it.
you think breathers are bad well let me tell you about existers they are the absolute worse walking around existing like they own the place, taking up space without paying for it.
I don't know man, i'm almost sure there's people being charged for that somewhere
I’m starting to think Batman is taking the wrong drugs from the pharmacy
💀
Bro thinks he’s vengeance and the knight and the Batman
1:50 Wow didn't think Batman was a Blink-phobe
Classic Stare-bait.
Dude blinkers cause real issues.
Sample text.
1:20 He blinked GET HIM!
Riddle me this, Batman, how can it be a hate crime if I love doing it?
If Robin is dating Starfire in this universe, he doesn't need a lecture on where babies come from.
Maybe he does since they haven't made one
Maybe he only knows about her species and not human babies
Since Robin is dating Starfire, Batman needs to give him the talk.
Batman casually rick-rolling Robin with the Birds&Bees lecture is hilarious.
Well, you see Luigi when a paisano likes a mama mia, he puts his spaghetti noodle in the mama mia's raviolo and a little bambino covered in brajuto comes out about nine months later
I was just thinking that
🤣🤣🫴🍝
_"Batman, when I say 'hate crimes', I'm talking about like crimes targeted at minorities."_
The original Batman serial has a prejudice against Japanese people, considering that it came out in the 1940s where WW2 is at its heights.
"I miss the good old days back when Batman was racist and still used guns to kill people"
Not everyone in the 1940s hated Japanese people.
To be fair the japenese had worse prejedice against literally anyone that wasnt japenese..
@@kameronmyles2013 To be fair to who, exactly? The racists?
Just because these views are old norms or victims come from a country that's super prejudiced doesn't mean you can hold that against them. Japan's warcrimes were a fucking lot, but "slap a jap" and concentration camps aren't the answer.
@@kameronmyles2013 still do
I love the line "SAMPLE TEXT" so emotinal 0:37
0:56
If only every hate crime could be resolved like this😂😂😂
Alternative start could be how Robin was actually thankful to Batman for explaining birth because he's only familiar with how Tamaraneans do it given his relations with Starfire.
That would be more terrifying than you'd think.
1:56
He just keeps explaining the birds and the bees
“Fucking blinker” killed me 😭
Btw who smeared Vaseline all over the video 💀
Using birth to avoid answering questions, works every time
I mean what did the police expect Batman to do if there were literally no clues left behind at the scene of the crime
If this video is played on a loop, its almost like Batman and Robin have short term memory, and the commssioner tries again and again to get Batman to help.
blinker is my new favorite slur
0:37 Batman when i say "Hate Crime"
*SAMPLE TEXT*
Batman: Oh Starfire, youre here! Let me explain.....
Robin: NO STOP!!
he should have ended that bit with "when TWO PEOPLE love each other very much..." *wink*
Around blinkers, never tinker
There is no such thing as "hate crime. There is only crime... and Batman's justice!
1:55 At this point I wonder how Batman would react if Robin managed to get with a girl and do the deed.
He would still explain it
he would backseat him
Presume Robin didn't use protection and makes part of the batcave into a nursery.
You know, speaking of the title, I *WISH* we could get a reprint of Batman: War on Crime, since I’ve heard _GREAT_ things about it, including how it may be one of, if not THE best portrayal(s) of Batman!
“I don’t know Batman, I think it might be a new villain. Since we give names based on appearance, we can call him “The Ghost”…
You know, because he leaves without a trace… Don’t know what you were thinking about.”
Just today a man was beaten near to dead outside his home just for speaking korean
Batman : Did he happen to leave a riddle
Okay but "blinker" is definitely an old-timey insult for something though
Batman: I am vengeance.
Wait... isn't vengeance a form of hate?
Not where I expected the video to go at all. 😂 No, Bats, I would not consider putting the mentally ill in a psych ward a hate crime. Breaking their bones to get them to comply, though....
Batman explaining sex to Robin is your own version of the Monty Python police gag.
Gotham problems with hate crime
Implies that Evil Batman has solved Hate crime.
Maybe people actually started liking it
But Batman, are you the guy who attacked the Korean man wasn’t Mark Whalburg?
It takes Batman joining the police force for him to realize that he was bullying the mentally ill... 😂
There’s a huge difference between “I do hate crimes” and “I do Hate Crimes”
I love how Batman still thinks Robin is a child
imagine being killed because you blinked
"I tried explaining that to them but then they just started beating up each other." Thats genuinely such a hilarious joke I love it.
"Fuckin' blinker" sounds like something Mickey O'Neil from Snatch would say - and i would 10000% pay to see a Mickey O'Neil version of Batman
Well as a great detective one said 1:49 we all should live by!
2:00 Guacamole Gamer Fart being shown makes my day even more than the video did 😂
You chillin till it’s “grandads ashes”
I swear, in Batman's mind when he talks to Robin, it always starts at 1:52-1:56 and somehow ends, but restarts at 0:00-0:03. So, everything else inbetween is Batman's "logical" thinking until Robin opens his mouth.
God, he's so smart.
*Batman when I say*
*"Hate Crime"*
*Sample Text*
Yeah, probably better to stay a vigilante and do your own thing. Imagine Batman having to sit down with HR. Actually, maybe a future episode?
Batman explaining birth to Robin is Solid JJ's way to tell us this one is actually a prequel to "Joker's new sidekick", which started with Batman asking Robin if he understood where babies come from. Bravo, Vince!
If Batman got involved most of the people committing hate crimes would be seriously injured and either in a hospital or prison
"You get dumber every video"
Well yeah, given the amount of head trauma he has received over the years it's luck he can even remember his own name.
Whenever "The Batman 2" releases in theatres, I'm going to yell "IT'S THE BLINKER!!" everytime Gordon is on-screen
Nooo, dont go into the ad, i wanted to hear batman explain babies..
The Blinker sounds like it could be a Batman Villan.
When Batman's phone keeps changing color and style 😂
0:09 haha he spelt agreement wrong, point and laugh
"You see when a man and a woman love each other very much"
"Be better"
- The Falcon
And that's why Keven Conroy's(RIP) animated Batman(1992) goes beyond...
0:42 Just for anyone who wants to point out he punched Nazis, this is a version of _silver age_ Batman from an alternate version of Earth-One, the Batman who punched Nazis was golden age Batman from Earth-Two. They are not the same character.
WE HAD TWO BATMAN ???!!!???
Hate crime? Boy do i
"Arctic cooler" I bet it doesn't even have diatoms
I’m so tired of those dirty blinkers. Why do they act that way?! They are the worst!! 😂
"Gotham's Most Pressing Issue is Hate Crime" You know, I feel like that's the one crime Gotham doesn't have a problem with.
They’ve done every other crime in the book so they might as well go for 100% completion.
It's like when i try to explain why there's almost no racism where i live
We're only humans, we merely have 24 hs per day, there's simply not enough time to add another reason to hate others to the list
They really need Batman's help because if Gotham is based on NY, their cops are way too busy committing hate crimes to stop other hate crimes.
"Commissioner?"
"Don't call this number"
"Fucking blinker".
I’m going to start calling random people Blinkers now.
I love how Batman has known that Robin has been 25, yet still feels the need to explain how babies are made to this 25 year old man.
And apparently Robin keeps letting Batman explain it and doesn't correct him till he's finished.
I think Robin gave up ages ago. Probably easier to just let the guy finish his lecture than waste his breath on a futile effort to correct him.
It a kind of "In my prime..." situation. Just let grandpa tell his story. Gotta respect them
When i was 21 my dad tried to have the talk with me and i was like "do i tell him i had sex already or let him proceed?"
While not everyone had done it before their 20s i guess everybody is supposed to know that
I don't know sometimes he had those senile moments haha
1:31 Batman has an entire gallery dedicated to Rouge the Bat?
The Rouges gallery is basically just all of batmans villains in gotham not the just rouge the bat
@@rockythewerepuppy2253 ROGUES. NOT ROUGE. NOT EVEN PRONOUNCED THE SAME.
@@BeeWaifuRouge Gallery is plural
@@Iiiiiiiii69iiiiiiiiii Rouge is French for red. It's written Rogue in English.
@@BeeWaifuI’m not sure what you’re getting at. Yeah maybe rouge means something in different in French, but feel that that obscure meaning isn’t related to the term rouge gallery, I mean joker wears mostly purple and green, the only red is his lipstick.
Honestly props to Batman for being so dedicated to the asylum, genuinely recognizing the mental illness and other issues in his villains and, instead of imprisoning or killing them, trying to seek help for them.
See, this is what happens when you make a Goddamn blinker the Commissioner of Police.
Why does Batman really like explaining birth?
Riddler : Do you know who commit the most crimes in the town despite being the smallest percentage of the population ? That's right Batman ! Arkham patients !
Based Man
Riddler is woke, he speaks against the system
@@lolasdm6959woke is the system.
Friggin' blinkers. Blinkin' and stuff. DON'T BLINK AT ME!
“Fucking Blinker…” had me rolling