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Google Translate tries to MEDITATE *fail*
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- čas přidán 12. 08. 2019
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Do you all meditate? Neither does Google Translate. (I do actually, would highly recommend.)
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“Life is meaningless. You have to pay the price before you get to witness death.”
That’s. Quite the mood.
Nihilistic Google
Mago Gosora I want a t shirt!!
i am tempted to like your comment but the number is 69, so thats great and i dont wanna ruin that.
I heard that and just thought heh mood
That's so true lol
Health tip: "If u have heart attack, don't think about the past" - Google Translate 2019
Also take a swan and breathe it into your soul
@@hugoguh1 😂
Flashbacks cause a more intense heart attack,think about your future,that will convince the body to live out of fear of missing your future life. A husband/wife,children,growing old,grandchildren....that all makes the brain paranoid it will alter time by it’s death.
@@alpacahat6771 r/woooosh
I dont care. That, my friend, was called a joke.
You are the one that got r/wooooshed
:)
I love how there’s always one point in every translation that things get randomly sexualized and also one where Google Translate is apparently having a severe existential crisis
And also taking a dive into Hell and demonic cults
In workout video Google Translate thaught how to bl0wjob
Same
And a cooking show
@@alessandro5932 is Probably the funniest and weirdest translation. Wonder what Malinda's inial reaction to that was before putting that part in the video.
“Take a swan and breathe it into your soul”
Taking “spirit animal” to a new level 😂
lmaooooo
I accidentally read “Taking spirit level to a new animal”
COCONUT
Coconut?
@@WarmBreadBearBuddy XDDDDD
Meditation should be calming. Therefore, Google Translate yells and unsettles you the whole time.
And once again, because body parts come up,
VAGINAS COME UP
I was the 1000th like
Except when it says "your thoughts become your perception." Interesting.
Circle is my favorite color what about perceiving the dead as they come? Sounds pretty scary, google
Normal version: Peaceful and calm
Google translate: Inhaling swans during a zombie apocalypse caused by aliens with an optimistic view at first until you realize your fate
I REALLY wanna like it but you have 88 likes and I don’t wanna mess it up. *;-;*
@@ohgods1637 you can like now
Ok! *👍*
This is The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals
Also, kind of a creeper.
“Life is meaningless. You have to pay the price to witness death.”
Google translate are you ok
Meditation: And ask yourself what if I gave myself permission to allow everything right now to be ok
Google translate: Ask yourself *what will happen if you become normal*
The one part where it translated correctly?
I probably wouldn’t exist-
The fact that I’m not normal at all, this question really scares me o-o
Google Translate are your ok
Philosophy exam question : Write a structured essay on the following topic: What is normality and how to percieve it?
Google Translate: It’s a demonic ritual, and every once in a while, it’s a cooking show.
This is too true. LOL!
:)
And sometimes, a couple fish and swan-soul-breathing
Quite the Hell's Kitchen
500 like uwu
Untranslated: Spiritual and relaxing.
Translated: A zombie's existential crisis during an alien invasion.
l
Thats making some sort of meal.
😂😂
Yeah that sounds about right
Makes sense.
OMG I died with this video LMAO
MORE LIKES
@@thebest_miyachinen there you go
Don't die
I am sorry for your loss😭😭😭😭😭😭😭🙏😭😭😞😢😓
R.I.P
Teacher: OK so, who knows what is good for learning brain?
Kid: Diabetes
Teacher: Very good.
Google Translate are your ok
I heard that in a district GrayStillPlays voice
actual meditation: relaxes the mind and eases the soul
google translate: forces you to philosophize and think deeply about the inevitability of death
That's translate for ya
Does Google Translate ever NOT turn things backwards?
Literally me when I try to meditate
@sam zuriel
Yeah..... not the best idea.
😂😂😂
"Stir and mix well."
"Allow to cool for 1 minute."
Somehow Google wants to turn this into a recipe…
Joshukaunarak this vid is that recipe of how she ended up with an accidental curse that results in death and being haunted by it after giving birth to the unholy and undead and why she did it
It’s for the Swans.
He just wants his cake
Forget meditation, I think this is a video for a cooking tutorial.
A recipe for disaster
Google Translate: "Will I be judged?"
all of Internet: "Yes!"
no you wont.
Combination of comedy, existentialism, and cake recipes. Utter perfection.
It was more cake recipe than the actual cake recipe video
I would watch that cooking show.
This vid is very funny.
I've breathed quite a few swans into my soul and let me tell you, don't do it every day. Swan overdose is possible and before you know it you'll find yourself standing in a lake at night waiting for the moon to rise.
I literally gigglesnorted at this comment. Thank you. It has been a rough week and I needed that laugh.
@@celticphoenix2579 It's just this week, isn't it?! It's been AWFUL! Glad you laughed too ❤
Keep going. You can't imagine the power waiting to be unlocked. I wish I had started far sooner, I've just been snorting frogs up until now.
ITS A NICE DAYYYYYY!!!!
**proceeds to talk about death, ghosts, and heart attacks**
Don't forget suffering in space!
maria georgievd of course, how could I forget 😂
Also, unholy wombs.
Lila Cleveland aaa yes 😂
@@kzcreationzmore I mean, what nice day doesn't include unholy wombs?
I've learned my lesson:
Google Translate is the darkest thing in existence.
“Those who cannot be controlled by humans.” Google translate: “You can say that again!”
Google Translate are your ok
*_Take a swan and breathe it into your soul. - Google Translate, 2019_*
I always feel so much better after doing this! :D
Don't!
Those unholy buggers fight back :'(
That line had me DEAD
We need that on a t-shirt!!
@@theweirdo6833 I agree
"Life is meaningless, you have to pay the price before you witness death."
DAMN
Shit just got real
Same
This is another proof that Socrates programmed google translate...
My sister when she first made a facebook account:
Dushmanthi perera
“These goggles are good”
"You have to pay the price before you get to witness death" is such a *raw line*
Fav line:
*take a Swan and breathe it into your soul*
3:44
Mine is "What would happen if you became normal?"
1:24
“Now the criminal body is doing it - high start your head and face. Is there tension in your vagina? Man I’m eager!Will I be judged?
Yes. The answer is yes. Very much so.
This was the most priceless quote for me! It sounds so wrong though!
It's my favorite quote i laught like hell when i hear it XD
Lots of tension ;)
GT's understanding of the human body is a bit weird.
Head, face, vagina, shoulders, shoulders, shoulders
That's a weird human.
Ireallyreally Hategoogle This is what peak performance looks like
"Life is meaningless. You have to pay the price before you can witness death"
Uh... Google??? Are you okay???
Lol, a little too woke there, Google :p
Taxes
@@imhereforhappiness7639 yeah, pretty sure the tax agencies would definitely keep you from dying if it meant extracting one more penny from you, lol.
that's sooo deep
Gloomy Fish No. GOOGLE is *never* okay.
"The sound of suffering in space, I think, is what you think of, your thoughts become your perception, you can see the dead as they come."
Thats like the most ominous and kind of coherent thing, I have heard on this channel.
"Look at the ghost"
Ghostbusters have joined the chat.
Luigi has joined the chat
3:44
Aaron, Zak and Nick joined the chat too
"If you have a heart attack, you should not think about the past."
... I mean, it's not WRONG per se...
It's actually more deep, then you think about it, because - when you die, the whole your life runs in front of your eyes (please do not check this, this ain't gonna end well)
@Kesey McCown Are you *sure* www.google.com/search?ei=WH1TXZyVCo_6wQPs7ZXQDQ&q=per+se&oq=per+se&gs_l=psy-ab.3..0i67l3j0l7.5286.5286..6114...0.0..0.116.116.0j1......0....1..gws-wiz.......0i71.yn3KRy42BRg&ved=0ahUKEwicoeqas4HkAhUPfXAKHex2BdoQ4dUDCAo&uact=5
Broken heart is actually proven to be a real medical condition so it's more right than it realizes.
Bad Freddy I had a near death experience and I can confirm it’s true
Calling 911 (or local equivalent) should be the first think you do. Don't waste time with other things, is I think the point. The longer one waits, the lower the chances of survival. Not that Google Translate would know that, but it got something right....
“You have to pay the price before you get to witness death” does that mean we need to pay to watch someone get the death penalty
It means you have to suffer living before you get sweet release
Nah just on the TV
nah, you just need to SUFFER AND SUFFER in your healthy health.
@@k.c.3674 XD i get the reference XD
@@k.c.3674 lol i get ir
"Is there tension in your v? Man, im eager." Im freaking dying.
3:23 'The sound of suffering in space'
Doctor Who in a nutshell
I admit it. I'm 63 years old, and your stuff has me giggling hysterically like I'm six every time.
I love how diverse Malinda's fans are
Ur a true American Hero
I’m WAY younger than you, and I’m honestly surprised to see how diverse the fans of translator fails are. But I’m honestly happy that Malinda has everyone rolling on the floor like little kids, laughing at how silly Google Translate is, whether you’re 10 years old or 95.
Man no judgement! We all laugh no matter what age
6 years later: pretty nice age.
welcome to your daily meditation.
IT"S A NIIIIICE DAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!
Lol.
That cracked me up 😂
21 seconds in and off to a good start 🤣🤣🤣
A great way to start out your productive morning..
That and the "It was him" fart scene got me. Lol
As a meditation teacher myself, I was laughing so hard....and in the end the breathing in of the swan almost did me in. . What would be funny for you to do I think, is positive affirmations for some issue or to claim your beauty, confidence, whatever. I just think that would be hilarious. A simple yoga class would be funny too. How about doing crafts of some type, or interior decorating or repurposing clothing? I always enjoy your videos! Thank you!
Try to imagine telling your meditation students all the Google translate instructions and watching their reactions. You could probably try something similar for April Fools. 🤣
@@HangryOnPaws LOL! That would be priceless! What a great idea! LOL. And I have just the sense of humor to do it.
@@heartsource417 Sounds awesome! Update me on the thread if you ever do it and let me know how it goes. 👍👍👍
@@HangryOnPaws 👍🙏🏻👍😃
@@heartsource417 ...did you do it?
Malinda: Simply observe yourself in this moment of time
Google Translate: *You do not know the body of Simon Cowell*
Me: 🤣😂👏🏻
Wait so is that implying that Google translate thought that Malinda was saying that whoever, was Simon Cowell, but really Google translate is Simon Cowell there for he was saying that we do not know his body 😅😂💀
"Life is meaningless,you have to pay the price before you get to witness death."
Google taking meditation and turning it into an existential crisis
If you can't turn something into an existential crisis you're not trying hard enough.
me: tries to meditate and relax
Google Translate: LIFE IS MEANINGLESS
It's not wrong!
Hell yes! And this is great! make your own meaning, find something worth doing, and hell, maybe there are squirrels here.
Well it's not wrong though
@@Carollnn Depends on your perspective.
Teachers: “Welcome to your daily meditation.”
Sub. Teachers:
*ITS A NICE DAY*
"Ask yourself, what will happen if you become normal?"
*shakes head while pulling a face*
I FELT THAT TOO HARD.
Ask yourself, what will happen when you become normal?
are you assuming that I’m GOING to turn normal?
Lmao bold of you to assume i possess the ability to be normal
*i don't*
The thought of this being a possibility is downright terrifying
i dont wanna be normal and i will NEVER be nornal
@@greed94 XD ikr
@@greed94 also thank you i am pleased with my latest choices as well UwU
Idk anymore i have nothing to do lol
This was part cooking instructions, part dreading life quotes and part just plain WTF.
Ikr 😂
Funny.😂😂😀😆
Sooooooo. Religion?
@@hiimspee828 😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Nobody:
Google: INHALE A SWAN INTO YOUR SOUL
“Take a swan and breathe it into your soul!”
-Google Translate 2019
"Ask yourself, what will happen if you become normal?"
I've been asking myself this for the longest time.
Mookie same. I haven’t tried it yet tho.
What exactly IS normal, though, if nature, our lives, and the unbelievably complex systems that drive all those things along with the multiverse itself, are so incredibly weird?
So... I guess Weirdmaggedon succeeded...? YEs- I MEAN noooooo! That is very extremely bad. Why would I (oops almost spelled it like 'eye') want the oddpocalypse itself to be successful? If I did I obviously would change my opinion immediately, of course!
@@cedartheyeah.justyeah.3967 Is it okay if I kinda love you?
Mookie ...Really not sure how to respond to that. Slrignaf esoht fo eno eb ton retteb uoy...
Mookie why be Normal when you can be random in all extremes it’s fun they said. They also said come to the dark side we have cookies and it’s fun
3:45 “Take a swan and breathe it into your soul.”
Meditation in a nutshell.
XD
Me when im trying to focus on an exam:
This is a DAILY meditation. Where do you keep all the swans?
Sofia Lopes hahahahhaha
@@sunflowersandstorms5608IN YO SOUL
0:49 for some reason this part made me laugh the most. There's something about people saying ridiculous things in a calm voice that I find very funny XD
"Take a swan and breathe it into your soul"
Ok Google Translate
"Life is meaningless. You have to pay the price before you get to witness death."
That is so deep
Me: I don't think anyone wants to pay to see someone's death penalty, Google Translate.
@@yurigacha-san1367 suppose it depends on the person getting executed ;)
The great butchers of history? Hitler, Stalin, Mao, etc? I could see people paying to attend their executions.
@@giin97 true
@@yurigacha-san1367 I think GT actually means that we have to pay the price by suffering for a certain amount of time on this world before being given the sweet release of death.
@@runetide I know. I just saw someone comment something similar so I wrote that because...Idk, I'm weird
I already know this is gonna be a disaster.
Edit: I was wrong, it was beautiful.
And it is a disaster. A hilarious, amazing, fantastic disaster.
Life is meaningless
You have to pay the price before you get to witness death
A beautiful, beautiful disaster.
Yo our pfp are similar
@Evelyn R-T
Huh. That's pretty neat!
2:20 "These goggles are good."
I felt that.
“What will happen if you become normal?”
-Shower thoughts 101
Google Translate: you have to pay the price before you get to witness death
Also Google Translate: you can see the dead as they come
Angela Davidson I guess we’ve all paid the price... I just wish I knew what it was 😱
We payed the price by watching the video
Congratulations on the giveaway! :D
@@yaraf.1108 Oh my gosh...thank you!!
@@angeladavidson2350 no problem! :D ♡
Me: Trying to have a nice day
Google: *YOU* *CAN* *SEE* *THE* *DEAD* *AS* *THEY* *COME*
XD
But *IT'S A NICE DAAAYY*
"Life is meaningless."
Thanks for the happy vibes, google.
This might help.
0:19
But what about the soul swans?
Malinda: *saying something calm*
Google translate: Farts*
“Ask yourself: what will happen if you become normal?!”
I ask that question a lot to myself
The ghost from the womb of the dawn of the unholy womb probably wouldn't smell like baskets of fish if you allowed the swan that you breathed into your soul to cool down for one minute prior to your inevitable heart attack.
What is it with all those heart attacks google translate keeps predicting?!?
Ikr
"Stir and mix well."
Wrong video, Google Translate.
Oof, Google translate, there was already a cooking video
@Nehemiah Britt
Still wrong video, Googs
@@nickywalcott1204 gOoGs
Okay but the Translated version is me during quarantine: 30% horniness, 30% depressive nihilism and obsession with death, 30% batshit insanity. And also some cooking!
The "IT'S A NICE DAY" part caught me
off guard. Then,the "It was him" part made me burst laughing,then the rest made me laugh while questioning the meaning of life.
Meditation: relax
Google's version: DEATH AND SUFFERING IN SPACE
What Does The Death And Suffering In Space Means?
also cooking instructions and breathing swans during existential crisis and zombie apocalypse caused by aliens
Nobody:
Google Translate: TAKE A SWAN AND BREATHE IT INTO YOUR SOUL
Btw we need a TAKE A SWAN AND BREATHE IT INTO YOUR SOUL T-Shirt
Why do i feel like that sentence is referencing bts' map of the SOUL 7 Black SWAN
How does a swan fit into a gingerbread?
Alessandro Ferreira It’s _mostly_ gingerbread; the rest is swan
@@WtfAreHandlesLol I felt that too...
My dad make custom shirts if u want I can help u with that just name a place we will make it and ship it to you! With reasonable price of course!
"Stir and mix well."
"Allow to cool for one minute."
GT is a chef.
Cooking can be a form of meditation.
“take a swan and breathe it into your soul” Ok omg I feel so much better
"If you have a heart attack you should not think about the past."
Thanks google!
Google Translate are your ok
@@lara8975 you*
@@FlynnHutchinson2000 o
true though
@@lara8975 reanimation cart needed! we lost Google Translate! Red code!
*"stir and mix well."*
Is this a meditation class or a cooking class?! 🤔
"allow to cool for one minute"
I think it is
"Oh, isn't this cooking class?"
Aisha Montenegro Yes
home economics course
its all of the classes in one
1:50 yep
A basic summary of the belief of nihilism
1:08
*What a great meditation so far*
"Will I be judged?"
Probably (read: definitely).
Probabile
The sound of suffering in space, I think, is what you think of; your thoughts become your perception, and you can see the dead as they come.
*Deep.*
This perfectly describes my spiritual journey. Now I only need to see dead people
Sounds like Inception 😆
@@Manas-co8wl just go to a graveyard
•AmxiCandy Gacha• r/foundthemobileuser
TheDarkOverlordOfAll [Liz] IKRRR, I wasn’t expecting Google to give such great advice!
"Ask yourself : what will happen if you become normal?"
Spongebob: I'm normal
i like how "focus on your breathing" turned into "look at the ghost"
As a type 1 diabetic I PROMISE you this has not taught me ANY brain
laura campbell but it will as you will be a zombie after you die mmmm brains 🧠
As another Type 1...I am in SO much agreement!
LIAR!
I’m pretty sure what they mean is that your supposed to learn more about the brain in the human body after getting diabetes
Eva Studios To be fair, it’s google translate, it probably doesn’t mean anything at all
And you learn more about your endocrine system and if your type 1 immune system!
" take a swan and breathe it in to your soul" - Malida 2019
Me: what great words to live by
*malinda
@@pravijarajesh *Melinda
Time stamp? 😂😂
@@apossiblyhereticalalphaleg3595 Diplinmaldinkat
@@dumbcarbattery5916 SUCCESION DIPLIMALDINKAT IS THE AUTHOR OF GOSS'S GREAT NATIONAL BASEBALL!!
"Stir an mix well" XD
Wrong training course, Google.
"Allow to cool for one minute"
And it's back to cooking.
2:38 That is me everyday
Lol, yeah.😂😂😂
“Take a swan and breathe it into your soul”
WHO GAVE GOOGLE DRUGS AND ALCOHOL
Who needs drugs and alcohol when you just breathe swans into your soul?
NonBinary Royal-ty or is google supporting demonic soul sucking activities
Why are you taking quack??
I breathe swans for my soul
The drainage
Teacher: Alright students this is important so listen up * proceeds to explain *
Me:
*Shoulders* *shoulders* *shoulders*
“If you have a heart attack, you should not think about the past” noted thank you😂
i love how gt is trying to introduce cooking into it
"Ask yourself: what will happen if you become normal?"
Then you become boring as well
Normal is overrated.
normalness leads to sadness :)
@@mysterysunfurled No, the desire for normalness leads to sadness
@Dodgy Dan you call yourself normal? right lol
@Dodgy Dan for starters your name is dodgy dan
Welcome to your daily meditation.
*I T ' S A N I C E D A Y*
I'm already dying of laughter😂😂
Me too🤣🤣🤣
Omg same here 😹
"You want to know why you are not alive."
Yes, that's very perceptive of you, Google Translate.
But it's not too bad being dead. As long as you didn't think about the past during the dying process, you'll be granted the ability to take a swan and breathe it into your soul! What more could I ask for?
The BE KIND BE KIND BE KIND BE KIND BE KIND BE KIND BE KIND Shirt feels like someone who really has a hard time being kind and kinda matches the energy of the Twisted Translations... _which probably needs this meditation_ Lol
So...Why did start meditating?Anger issues?Relaxing?To find peac-
G.T: *I came here to FIGHT!*
Makes sense since Google Translate managed to breathe a swan into its soul despite not having a soul or the ability to breathe, it being unknown whether or not souls exist and if so, if it's possible to breathe anything into said soul, swan physiology, and swan psychology.
You ask yourself, what will happen if you become normal?
I extremely relate to this...
Google Translate are your ok
But do you know why are not alive?
Same
I've actually thought about it before
1: regular meditation
2: bake a cake, while having existential dread
"Ask yourself: what would happen if you became normal?" The question I ask myself everyday.
Same tho-
No one:
The translated version was more calming.
😂
It was tho
yea
It honestly was tho-
“Diabetes can help you learn brain.” Google translate 2019
The problem is, it's not available for sale.
Pongsathon Boonrod I’m pretty sure that’s due to compressed diabetic watermelons.
Diabetes can help you learn brain! - best I've heard for a while.. made me laugh out loud.
Galexie Reed LOL
Rip malinda's community
You meditating: calm
Meanwhile, Google: trying to meditate i while having a mid-life crisis and dementia simaltaneously
“Take a swan and breathe it into your soul.”
Wow! Google translate is getting rid of the goose imposters too! THE POWER OF HYÖNK HYÖNK COMPELS US!
"Take a swan and breath it into your soul." How exactly are you supposed to do that? Anyone???
And eat it
@@malenehougard7588 hold up
@Noa Grace Welborn noooo
I think it means you should swallow it whole while it's still alive
@@wasupman1074 A year later I finally understand how
you steal its soul out of its body and consume the flesh afterwards :)
"Is there tension in your vagina, man I'm eager!"
Malinda: *nods and smiles knowingly*
:D
jemimus that part had me dying. Her actions were perfect. 😂😂
@Natalie Johnson No judgement here.
@@Nitsua16 lmao
"Life is meaningless. You have to pay the price before you get to witness death."
Sigh, Google Translate is so inspirational...
Listening to this is like scenes in movies with the little devil and angel on your shoulders. It's beautiful.
I need “take a swan and breathe it into your soul” on a t-shirt
Me too.With a picture of Emma Swan from"Once Upon a Time"!;-)
Tigger Talks A lot that’s the front the back should say proud supporter of accidental demonic translations by: GOOGLE TRANSLATE
Ariel Comly yes definitely!
Malinda: calm and collected
Google translate: *shoulders, shoulders, shoulders*
these goggles are nice
"Diabetes can help you learn brain"
Thanks google translate
Google Translate: ITS A GOOD DAY!!!!
Also Google Translate:*Proceeds to talk about ghosts, death, heart attacks and pretty much convincing a person something that isn't true and might make them die