r/Entitledparents My Family Hates My Parents for Ruining My Life
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- čas přidán 24. 07. 2024
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0:00 Intro
0:09 My parents made my birthdays about my little sister
"Sneaky Snitch" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) License: CC By Attribution 3.0 - Komedie
The irony of obsessing over the child who almost didn't survive, is those parents killed the relationship they did have with their other child
And in this case they ruined their relationship with the rest of the family and their daughter. As OP said at the end of the day all his parents have are their jobs which they had to work longer at to afford sister’s schooling
i think they killed both, OP is not gonna forgive that they made his sister the golden child, and the sister will hate them for putting her into bording school for 10 years
They killed their kid with kindness as their spoiled princess now won't be able to function in the real world
@@ahstiasummers5583 and at this point the boarding school will likely create resentment instead of rehabilitation
@@ahstiasummers5583 correct, she now thinks the world revolves around her & for future as an adult will probably be really awful as in drugs, booze, unplanned pregnancy.
To be fair on the other relatives part, the parents probably LIED to them about how "Kind and considerate OP was to share/give his birthday to his sister" HOWEVER, to ANY other families out there, PLEASE keep an eye out if someone in your family is being treated unfairly. Because otherwise, they'll end up like poor OP in this story.
These people DO NOT deserve children. And please to ANYONE whom went through what OPs mom did. Don't just suddenly act like this! Yes, almost losing your child was terrifying but it is NO EXCUSE to suddenly neglect your other child and spoil the other!
OP did mention that the relatives were told by the parents that "he was fine with it" so that is clarified.
another important thing to recommend to people in general though is: always speak up to multiple parties and dont be scared of being labelled a "snitch", especially when it is about your own family.
multiple opinions definitely help a lot. but worst thing to do is going to the internet with the story, because people online wont be able to help with the issue at hand, unless you just seek affirmation.
I agree! Treat all your children equally, no matter what. Not everybody deserves to be a parent 🙄
Yeah but at some point, they should've realized something was up. OP would've at some point shown clear signs that he was unhappy, even if he had a smile on his face. Plus the fact that they only go to places the sister liked should've also been a red flag. And the sister blowing out the candles instead of him is a crimson flag. Though at least OPs relatives has stopped turning a blind eye and I hope they keep doing so. But OP should go no contact with his parents.
I just petty OP because he will never get what he wants most, he doesn't want an apology, an inherented pay, what he really wants was his childhood that was stolen by her sister, OP hasn't had a childhood since he was 8 years old, and he didn't get to celebrate one thing throughout his child without his sister being in the thrown, not his birthday, not prom, not even his goddamn graduation, HIS high school graduation, and because everyone in his family are now disgusted with his parents, and I'm betting in a few months after making this post, as soon as OP has a chance to get his only place, he will do everything in his power to stay away from his parents and bitch of a sister
just because they were probably lied to doesn't excuse all the obvious signs of unhappiness and discontent which in my opinion went practically ignored. the relatives can plead ignorance all they want but if it's very blatantly obvious like it sounds in this story than i have a hard time feeling any compassion for them
Those parents deserved everything they got! Let's hope little Miss Prince-ass learns that other people matter. My heart goes out to the OP!
The kid is also a victim, she could have been a nice considerate child had their parents not ruined her and she could have also had a nice relationship with her big brother if the parents didn’t destroy any possibility for that as well. And instead of paying for both kids to go to therapy, even if op is 18 now, at least taking that bit of responsibility to undo the damage that they’ve created, they shipped off the girl so that someone else can take care of their problem and left thwir son forever feeling like they never gave a shit and neither they do now. Fucking insane people.
You can’t really fault the child when she was taught to act that way. All you can do is hope that she will be able to grow as a person, if things don’t change she won’t know how to care for herself when she is older. She will be stuck relying on other people forever.
“…ass,” lol
@@hm5468 No not really, she had several other good relatives that would've taught her to do better and redeem herself but at this point it was way too late, the reason they couldn't is because they thought the parents were good parents, not selfish pricks
The parents were just stupid and deserve they're reputation ruined, they sat they're children for failure from the very beginning
It made me more sad that the sister was set up for a terrible adult life. It wasn't her fault it was 100% the parents. She was taught at a young age she could get whatever she wants and it would be very hard to deal with.
I can't help but notice that the moment the parents had to start making the daughter behave, they sent her away to someone who would discipline her for them.
It's literally sickening. They just couldn't be bothered to fix their mistakes, to give her real love and guidance. They just throw her away for behaving exactly as they taught her to, when she's too little to even understand what's going on. She must have felt just as unloved as her brother did, after that. Alone and confused and hurting and missing her family and home. She was spoiled but that wasn't her fault. All they had to do was take the time to set boundaries and teach her right. She's going to come out of that school all kinds of fcked up. The parents stole their childhoods, their happiness, their trust and hope and innocence. They even stole the bond that those kids would have had for life of they'd been less selfish and lazy.
My heart hurts for both of those siblings. Shame on those parents. They did bad and then they did worse. So much worse.
@@lishrich May they rot alone and lonely in a state funded nursing home.
@@lishrich I hope and pray that both OP and his sister cut contact with their parents.(also I’m learning not all kids that go to boarding school that come out mentally stable)
Tbh i dont think the parents have the spine to discipline the girl themself without help, like they would try for some months (if even that long) or just to show that "heey we are trying to do better now" and then boom go back to spoil her little by little and finding excuses like "oh she listen to us today, we should give her a gift for her good behavior" until they go back to how they started.
I would say that this time with the girl away the parents should go to therapy to idk how can learn to do better
@@UzumakiNarue Sounds about right. Realistically, the boarding school might me the only realistic chance to have her grow up into a sane, normal adult. But based on my experience with people who went to boarding schools...... kinda hit and miss, well probably a few misses for every hit tbh. A lot of messed up people there.
That flowery cake he got for his 18th birthday was the best gift he had ever got from his parents; it demonstrated physical proof of what sort of hellscape OP was living through. Parents got what they deserved. And OP is right that this is very much a case of "Too little, too late."
No one could see that cake and him running out crying after yelling what they did to him for 10 years and not connect the dots.
@@Axodus i mean it's kinda understanding since the parents were lying throughout his whole life, telling the family he wanted to share his moments with his sister. It doesn't excuse anyone noticing the cues, but it does explain the situation
I’ll add to that this proof of the parents narcissism
Spoil the sister to that degree
You will need to whoop that ass until she fixes herself
@@badvoodoo2097True that.
OP was 18 and ugly crying, I'm 27 and this story made me shed a tear, myself! I don't think I would've lasted 8 years of being the Scapegoat, though. That man has the patience of a damn saint.
It's not so much that it's patience as it is tolerating it as a matter of survival. I was in a similar situation and I did my best to push back and what was neglect turned into abuse from my mom and reluctant indifference from my dad
I crying so badly at this story, heck I don't even know how birthday cake for my birthday taste like! All Birthday cake I have eaten only for my big sister...
@@randomness2167 That's so sad. :( Go and buy yourself your own birthday cake, if you can. Treat yourself!
@@Kelaiah01 I will when I have the money to buy one
@@randomness2167 Good! Good for you. I hope you enjoy it, thoroughly! *hug*
Sending the 8 year old away to boarding school is punishing her for their mistakes rather than owning up to it and trying to fix it. She'll hate the parents for abandoning her just like they abandoned OP. The parents need to work long and hard to regain any relationship with both of their children.
Depends. Boarding school allows for visits and things. It’s not “wilderness” it’s like collage. Sleep away camp honestly. There’s a routine and she’s away from the problems. As long as they visit and are active in the life of their daughter at school then she won’t be feeling abandoned.
@@Ax-xo4ux Plus, they'll discipline her, unlike her useless parents.
How do you fix 8 years of demolishing the life of 1 child and spoiling the other to the point that both are on opposite extremes?
Boarding or military school is literally the only type of parenting they can do to fix their daughter, they need to spend the time she's at boarding school to fix their relationship with their son. The daughter can do fine for 1-2 years with less attention, OP will need all the attention his parents can give him.
@@Predated2op said it'd be until she was eighteen. Ten years
@@undertalefan5867 they said that they heard that it may be her school life until shes 18. He only heard from others and he doesnt even filly know if thats the case. Its likely, but not guranteed. So it could be less.
Those parents really infuriated me. Favouritism always sets the child up for failure.
At least in the end they're on the right path to redemption, but they still clearly have a long way to go
Yes. Shame that it cost them their son. But it’s good riddance to them.
They really just fucked up both of the kids
The absolute worst thing that can be taken away from you by your parents is your childhood, imagine not being able to just be a kid with little responsibilities since you were 10
Favoritism isn't a problem if each parent favorites a child and there's no despise towards one child.
For example My step-dad had daughter, my step sister and there's my older daughter, he likes girls more than boys, this is a fact: "men need to grow a pair and solve things by themselves", so clearly he does more for their than me, but he clearly likes me and did good things for me too.
My mom, however, likes me more, I believe it's because after both my sister started to work when I was like 12 (my step sister is 4 years older and my sister is 5.5 years old), I was her solo company as she worked nightshift at her work and rarely saw my step dad during the week, besides doing or helping with chores at home, I also had all my meals with her, cooked together, went to movies and etc.
After my college me and my older sister (my step sister married at the age of 20 and had a daughter last year, my step father had a house for her to move in with my brother-in-law) moved out together, and my mom clearly misses more, she even say that without me mostly of days as she stopped working feel lonely without my company.
Luckily, we moved out to the same neighborhood, just a 10 minutes walk away, so she comes to take my dog to her apartment and when I left work, I pass by to take my dog and have a cup of coffee with her.
We have favoritism, but it's clearly balanced out, no one feeling neglected.
@@AgentUltimate7 one parent liking one child and the other like the another isn't the issue. it's that parents showing conditional love between their children, and treating one as the golden child while treating another as the scapegoat.
a child's love my their parents is meant to me unconditional, if you and your partner doesn't love your children equally, it's still favoritism because you don't love them unconditionally.
What gets me is after all of that, they send the kid off to boarding school. There's no way boarding school is cheaper than a family therapist or child behavorist. They STILL refused to face the monster they created.
I was thinking the same thing. They made the mess, but gave it to someone else to clean up. A therapist and setting limits and consequences on her behavior would have been better. And they could reassure her that they love her, but that she can’t behave that way anymore. She’s at that school feeling angry and abandoned and not understanding why. They’ve damaged her twice over.
Talk about a waste of money if she doesn't straighten up that attitude sooner or later
But yeah, some therapy could've helped alot ngl
@Rslash2 shut up you damn bot
Cheaper probably but maybe not the most effective at this point. The kid doesn't understand why she was abandoned and that's probably traumatizing to her, but they probably wouldn't be capable of reversing the damage with just a therapist. That only works well if all 3 adults put in the work. Unfortunately it's hard to expect people to change overnight, I don't think the mom especially would be able to do what that kid needs from her. She'd probably secretly spoil her and then pretend she doesn't understand why she's not improving. The school can provide a good routine/structure and reinforce rules that she very much needs, albiet cause other issues like truama. Hopefully they have a counselor or a child behavior specialist too there. It's probably the best option all things considered.
@@TheJulietxo Id say that if the institution stands for something they are well prepared for unamangable hellspawn. I actually know how these school operate a bit because I also had behavioral problems around grades 1 - 5 (Europe based, dont know about US). Depending on the school you either have a smaller one specializing in one field (my case - severe ADHD) or a more general one where you are assinged to specialists about your specific problem. In this case I believe that the second option would be better, since there is not just one thing wrong here (like a mental disorder).
Basically there are two outcomes for the kid right now
A: She suffers for a few months, or even a year or two, straightens out and becomes at lest a decent being.
or B: She suffers it through, biting her time, hating her parents, her brother, her relatives, basically the whole world. From there its gonna either end up:
In criminale or drugs
she becomes a karen
or end up in suicide.
The parents really fucked up, but its still not too late. I read the original post and I think R/ made a mistake in saying her age being 8 (considering OP said there were 10 candles, and saying "*around* 10 years younger") instead her actually being 10. I am not a psychiatrist, but from the random tid bits I read up on around the net: The childs psyche is the most influenced between the ages of 3 - 7, but if action is taken before the age of adolescence, damage can be mostly fixed, unless the case is the most extreme, but the later the action is taken the harsher the correction will have to be.
There might even come a time when the sister might thank OP and parents for setting her straight.
I have a daughter that almost died when I gave birth to her. Its a long story but I'm so grateful for the doctor that saved her life... I could never imagine treating her any differently than I treat my son. The parents in that first story are so messed up.
Good. Please take this story to heart and NEVER do what these bad parents did.
Right? Glad not every parent is like those people!
That's how you know some people should absolutely not be parents.
It's the only story though.
I absolutely being a bit scared with something like that happening but showing both kids plenty of love makes you a good parent.
This is so infuriating. I am SO GLAD the rest of the family came to their senses.
Sounds like the family were in the dark because of what the parents have probably told them over time
Yeah. Tbh, I'm glad they realized what was going on and are trying to make up for it. Too many times I've heard about the family siding with the parents, so this is a nice change.
I want to give OP a hug, I just feel awful and I understand him. I'm thankful that my parents and siblings aren't like this. I'm a dude, a year younger than him in the story.
Edit: OP's grandfather is the goat in this story. He's awesome
The one and only story: That little girl is damaged. Honestly, she does not know right from wrong, nor have empathy for others at all. And, it is 100% not her fault. Those parents are disgusting, even evil, and shoulder all responsibility for anything that girl ever does. My god, how sick; how sad!
Even with parents spoiling her, she may be a psicopath. Because even 8 year old can understand this stuff
@@cakeassassin6277 how would an 8 year old know any of that stuff if her parents have never taught that, and in fact taught her the exact opposite? The way other kids her age know things like this is because they’ve been taught that their whole lives by their parents.
@@TheSofkujepanen Unless she's never had exposure to other people at any point in her life, she would have an idea of right and wrong. She just didn't care because mommy and daddy didn't care.
@@TheSofkujepanen bro 8 year old me very much so didn't agree with some of the shit my mother tried to teach me. Even at 6 being brought up in an EXTREMELY religious country I already thought it was bs even when I've always been told it was right and good. I think being treated like a princess tho would've effected me. If my mither treated me better then I'd probably have trusted every word she said
"First story?" There was only one story.
The worst part is that these parents have now ruined their relationship with BOTH children. Their son has been neglected throughout the most formative years of his life, where he probably needed them the most. I speak from experience when I say that you CANNOT walk that back. No amount of being around for adulthood makes up for raising yourself as a child. And the daughter clearly lacks empathy and only understands love through getting her way. Her parents went from giving her the world on a silver platter to sending her away from home and now if she ever comes around, she'll have to sit alone in some school far away from home and wonder, "If my parents love me, why would they have done this to me?" The little girl is young enough that I still believe she's a product of her parents, though that's not to excuse her behaviour. These two parents have fundamentally ruined the lives of both their children and now they have nothing because of it. Unbelievable.
in the cases of both children, the quote "it is easier to raise a strong child then to heal a broken man." comes to mind.
I just hope that OP is able to build his life up from there. Perhaps years of therapy will help him through the abuse and mistreatment that he had to live through. He may never completely recover, but I just hope that he is able to live better.
With the daughter, the school is basically raising her now too. They abandoned one child for the other and now have abandoned that child too. Boarding school doesn't fix anything tbh. FFS some serial killers have attended boarding school and all it taught them was how to lie better. If this kid is this violent to a car, what could she do to the parents when she leaves the school? Those parents are fucked in every way.
I was the sister in story 1. I don’t wanna get too into it, but while I wasn’t quite as harrowing to bring into the world, I did usurp my brother’s place as the favourite child. Cue a lot of trauma, some ABA bullshit and you have a mess of a person who doesn’t know how to be loved unconditionally and someone who’s still guilty for stuff that happened pre-puberty.
@@LizLuvsCupcakeshope you both are doing better
I love how invested r/slash gets in the stories and expresses the feelings that the stories portrayed. Well done!
The irony is now they lost both kids
Yeah that's why I love coming back to this channel. EmKay and others are alright but rSlash really puts that passion into reading these Reddit stories, and lets you know his thoughts too.
@@datachu I used to listen to the robovoiced ones. Once I found R/Slash, I don’t think I’ve ever listened to one.
He's a real good narrator. I've been thinking of reading for audiobooks to make some extra money or something, and while I already know I'm a good narrator, I'm definitely paying attention to how he reads to see what I can learn from him!
@@datachu I live when Robin (on Emkay) reads the infuriating subreddits, as he really gets into the readings.
The black sheep story kinda put a smile on my face with how the entire family, though in the wrong, realized their damage and stood up like an army against his parents.
Holy shit. As "the other kid in the house" myself this level of pychological abuse is shocking. My god, i hope OP gets a great job because that therapy bill is going to be massive.
My sister was the "other kid." When I was real little, I just thought that's how we were supposed to treat her but when I became a young teen I started to hate my mom for how she treated her. I'd stand up for her and my mom would try to tell me she has me brainwashed. She's even convinced my grandparents that my sister is the one at fault for everything.
I've distanced myself from them and my sister and I are pretty close these days but you can still see the damage that a childhood being treated like that has caused.
Saw this happen with my cousin. They went from being the baby of the family to being the"problem child", because no one was willing to admit that they neglected her. Now, twenty years later, their father wonders, why he didn't knew they were married, until my sibling accidentally spilled the beans, four years after the deed.
Viloa, I hope your family comes around and makes up for their gross oversight of you. Sending some hugs for comfort across the internet to you **squeeze*
I've seen some crazy shit spoiled brats have done but destroying a car is new to be but I can definitely believe it happened
OP needs to send the bill to his parents and make them pay it! Plain and simple.
@@adamguymon7096 that is a brilliant idea :D
Good lord, OP's sister is guaranteed to be a psychopath when she grows up. His parents made their bed... they don't deserve OP's forgiveness.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if OP decided to cut ties with his parents and told them to have a nice life with their favorite child.
I'd say she's more like a sociopath. Psychopaths are better at masking and compartmentalizing, even at young ages, since they quickly discover they'll get caught if they don't learn to outfox authority figures. Sociopaths just go off like poorly stored TNT.
I wouldn't be surprised if that girl ends up so out of her mind that she goes and *murders* her parents. Holy *crap* they made a monster.
If she was a teenager I think I'd agree, but at age eight, I think she probably still has time. Gonna need INTENSE psychological and lifestyle intervention (the boarding school may or may not be a good first step just depending how that goes) but eight is a little early to be writing a child off completely.
This is probably the best thing that could have happened to her. Hopefully there's someone there that can really fix her when she's older. 8 all those lessons aren't gonna stick, but give her 5-6 years for her brain to mature, and she'll get a chance
This hits so hard to home. Hurt to listen to because I was also the kid who had to give up everything. Even the money my father gave to my mother to support me. Just so my nephew (who’s deaf) could get what he wanted.
People who favor one child over another are asking for EXACTLY what they get.
@@Scottsteaux63 agreed
I’ll say this once I’ll say this twice I’ll say this 1000 times people just because you have a goddamn disability it does not give you the right to be an ass!!! and I say that as a person on the autism spectrum and who’s mom has worked on the board of ASLA for pretty much half of my life
Also I’m really sorry that happened to you that really must’ve sucked I hope you’re doing way better now and at the very least you’ve cut off contact from them or at the very least your nephew
Are you sure it wasn’t to buy hearing aids? My best friend is deaf, and before Joe Biden recently changed it, she had to pay $2-3,000 PER HEARING AID. So her family had to regularly drop $6,000 for her hearing aids. Other ear related care isn’t any less expensive, and insurance companies will not cover it. Her parents do not know sign language, so without her hearing aids she basically has no way to communicate
@@DustyHoney Doesn't matter if it was for hearing aids or not. Even if OP's nephew is completely deaf without them, the fact of the matter is that the money was supposed to be used to help OP or be for OP. Instead OP's family took the money and spent it on the nephew. Even if it was for hearing aids, why should OP have to give up the money for their Nephew? It's OP's money and OP should be able to do with it as they see fit, not have someone else use it even if it was to help someone.
This story is the justice that every boy with a pampered entitled sister as a direct result of their parent's obvious favoritism needed to hear. Thanks!
It's justice to girls with pampered entitled brothers too.
@UnhingedUnit you're right, even though this story has the female as the entitled one and that was my perspective too, but, it can be applied to either gender. 🙂
@@rdbuckels :]
In the west I'd say it's girls getting pampered and in the east I'd say it's boys getting pampered
@@1nn1tmate I think it’s usually just the youngest
As much as the first story breaks my heart every time I hear it, I am so glad and proud of OP for telling his entire family his true feelings and not giving any of them any room to make excuses. I hope he treats himself to the best birthdays he can afford for the rest of his life, if only because he's owed the privilege after the emotional hell he was put through. I hope he doesn't let his parents ruin the concept with their selfishness, because he deserves to associate his day with celebrating himself, not his bratty sister.
And Godspeed to whatever therapist may have to deal with the sister, because you know she's gonna need one, once reality hits her in the face.
Fuck the parents. Just... Fuck them.
Godspeed to OP's therapist too because there's no way in hell he won't need one after 18 years of this bullshit.
On a side note, happy Thanksgiving everybody 😊🦃
@@treehugger0241 only 8 years of living with absent parents and psycho sister. But he will still need a therapist for sure
They deserve what was coming for them. I’m so glad for having perfectly normal parents yet at the same time I feel very privileged that there are people out in the world like this or even worse.
i don't think that he wants any more birthdays in his life.
once you connect something traumatic like that to a birthday, you just want to avoid them and birthdays aren't necessary.
at leasts that how it was for me (though for entirely other reasons than this story)
You can tell how much they were willing to shove OP aside in favor of OP's sister to the point that you'd think that he wasn't even real. That's how bad it is. Even worse, the sister became worse than a spoiled princess, pouting over having a single day not about her, committing destruction multiple times, and assaulting someone *all while she's 8 years old.*
Never play favorites, because once you start, you've already set someone up for failure, and you'd have the luck of the gods to have any chance of reconnecting.
Why the peck do people still do this "Golden Child and Scapegoat" stuff? You'd think after so many articles and research, people would be wise enough to not go this route, yet it STILL happens!
I mean, narcissism could be why, but still, it's just not a good route
i mean... narcissists are literally former "golden children". they've been raised to feel like they're overly special and deserve it all.
i can understand the desire to want to treasure your child whose birth almost cost their and their mother's lives.
but yeah, those parents definitely lost sight of reality
@@MinatsuAi narcissism also stems from children not having anything then thinking they deserve everything.
Parents who can't understand their kids are kids, not their personal friends. Being a parent isn't about making their kid happy at every second of their life or to shield them from everything, but about teaching them how to function independently. It's partially just being human to pick favorites among friends, and bad parents forget that their kids are different from adult friends who already understand what acceptable behavior is
@@MinatsuAi Narcissism is also a disorder born from trauma, such as bpd and others; its not always a root cause but many narcissists also come from being neglected or abused
I’ve been thru favoritism for 4 years and that shit sucked so bad that I hated everyday of my day of my life op is a better man than I am for putting up with that for 8 years
I honestly feel bad for the sister, it isn't her fault that her parents spoiled her rotten. She's an immature kid who doesn't know another life and then everything she was used to got taken away from her from one day to the next and she clearly doesn't know how to cope with that full 180. They really messed both their kids up.
🎉
Yeah, it's not her fault her parents are terrible. If she's so special, then they owe it to her to bring her up to be decent, and they didn't even try.
My best friend, who's like a sister to me, had a very similar childhood, except she's the younger daughter and her mom couldn't have kids anymore after her, and instead of caring more about her, her whole family RESENTED her for it, and it was her older sister that got gifts on her birthday and was super spoiled etc. She was also very isolated as a kid so she thought it was NORMAL for the older sister to get gifts on the younger's birthday. Legit when she graduated and moved out, ending up moving in with me and my husband, she was actually CONFUSED when I gave her a birthday present and made her a cake. Needless to say I tend to go a LITTLE overboard celebrating her birthdays now lol
Honestly, I feel bad for the sister. Not because she didn't get her way, but because the parents completely screwed her by raising her that way, and all that turmoil she will have at boarding school will be all their fault and she will hate them for it
Hopefully boarding school will do her some good, being away from those enablers and having proper stability in her life can put her on the right path so she can have a normal life
I hope she does learn. That way, she could also hate her parents for ruining her life.
The tragic part of this is that the damage is probably done. She may never be capable of a real relationship with anyone ever.
@zadieswinson1112 i wouldnt say that. Shes still young enough to fix herself. With plenty of help from her peers and counseling, she could turn herself around for sure
I hope you are right. I hope they get her therapy in addition to the school, because just punishing her with boarding school will only make her see herself as a persecuted victim. He complete lack of empathy is worrisome.
The fact the parents immediately got mad at OP for “making a scene” just for being upset shows that they are too far gone to change for the better. Even after the whole family told them about themselves I’m sure the moment the parents were alone again they were all “everyone else is wrong and we didn’t do anything wrong because we felt sad about our daughter once so that excuses everything we do for the rest of time”
I found another video with extended updates. The little girl actually ended up in a psychward after boarding school didn't work out...
There’s been a bunch of updates to this story, so I’ll give a quick summary of what I remember:
The sister was just as awful at boarding school, with repeated conduct violations. Finally, she was kicked out after threatening suicide in exchange for sweets (she had been forced onto a diet by the school because she was overweight)
The sister was committed to a psychiatric hospital after that, and as far as OP knows, has been residing there permanently. She has repeatedly threatened to hurt the parents, blaming them for causing all her problems. She originally blamed OP, but sh has since agreed that OP had every right to be upset, and that she does owe him an apology. They haven’t seen each other since his 19th birthday, where she threw another tantrum because she wasn’t allowed to have cake (remember, she’s on a diet)
The stress of the increased workload and the empty nest caused the mother to suffer a severe mental breakdown where attacked OP’s father. She was arrested, fired from her job, and the father filed for divorce. She was diagnosed with the same mental illness that OP’s sister apparently has, and is on medications.
OP originally went NC with his mother, but agreed to LC after her doctors asked for him to be involved in her recovery. OP is very LC with his father, only talking to each other once in the past year.
What I can't stand is the fact that the parents basically realized that they had spoiled their kid rotten. And rather than making an effort to change, go to family therapy, and try to start being better. They want to ship her off for someone else to deal with for the rest of her childhood.
It's probably giving her serious trust issues, all she did was behave within the framework of how she was raised.
The fact that she can't tell right from wrong and is a whole menace, is exactly what her parents raised her to be.
I think 3-4 years of strict discipline at a boarding school is a good thing, but once she is 12 or 13 she needs to go home and in the meantime those parents need to Educate themselves, get therapy, and take parenting classes.
Once she comes back they can be better parents and show her love without spoiling.
That's more reasonable than I was expecting based on the first paragraph lol. Honestly, I think sending her to someone who will actually instil some discipline is probably a good idea as it genuinely seems they are incapable of doing so with her. Everything else you wrote with I pretty much agree with, I just feel that they literally aren't capable of acting as responsible parents after 8 years of being idiots. They need some time to learn how to be parents and in that time it's probably a good idea to have someone else start fixing the damage they did.
The thing that bothers me about sending the girl to boarding school is that the parents just gave up, threw their hands in the air and decided to let someone else clean up their mess. They decided not to have any involvement to fix what they caused nor have they made attempt to be parents to their daughter. Their first step should have been counseling for themselves and their daughter but they choose the easy way out. I feel bad for this girl because she grew up being spoiled and entitled when she didn't know any different. Hopefully she will realize that this isn't normal and find a way to be well adjusted and find happiness.
They obviously are too entrenched into their ways to learn from their mistakes.
@@Alterego912 that's a very good way of putting it and I totally agree
@@Alterego912 They'd probably go right back to spoiling her rotten the moment the rest of their family is off their back
@@ahstiasummers5583 obviously.
clearly they have absolutely zero parenting skills. It's no wonder when faced with the reality of what led to their daughter turning into a nightmare, they didn't have the ability to fix it and just decided to give her to someone else to do it for them
My brother was born when I was 8 years old. He was born special needs. He is verbal and could learn to do some things on his own if my mother didn't baby him so much. We always shared birthdays in the summer time, even though he was a fall baby and I am a winter baby. We were both just unlucky to be born so close to the holidays that my parents thought it wasnt fair to whoever was invited over to worry about gifts for us when Christmas gifts needed to be bought. So every year in the summer we had shared birthdays, which at first as a child was fine. But my mom and dad were originally in denial about his mental disability until he turned 3. Then he got everything he wanted. I never got a birthday to myself, even in my teens. At a young age i was forced to baby sit without pay and I didnt get to see my friends because they needed me to watch him. By the time they got home it was dark so I couldnt even go outside in the parking space to ride my bike. Eventually they let me have one friend over when I babysat, but they all stopped coming after a while because it was boring at my house. I felt isolated and started sleeping my days away. Even when I was very young and my brother just learned to walk he was allowed to stay up later than me no matter if it was a school day or not. All I wanted to do was watch TV with my mom and dad until the episode of whatever we were watching was over, or until the movie we were watching was over. (It was those "free movie" channels that came with whatever bundle your cable came with.) But noooo... I had to go to bed, and I could hear my brother laughing and having fun until nearly midnight... I didn't even get a sweet 16. My mom and dad split up that year, and my mom was too busy with her boyfriend to even come see me. She only lived 30 minutes away. And there was no harsh traffic since it was a saturday. My dad took me to the movies, but it wasnt the party i hoped for... I saw that show that was popular at the time "Sweet 16" I wasnt expecting like a horse drawn carriage or anything. I just wanted a nice backyard party with a DJ, I have family that are DJ's who I know would have done it for free!! But nope. Didnt even get my "make up party" in the summer time...
And then when I was 21 (I was still living at home, it was hard to find work, so long as i did my chores i was fine.) i made plans for my birthday with my best friend WEEKS in advanced. The day of, an hour BEFORE i was supposed to show up at her house my mom tells me im not going out because SHE has plans with her then BF to go to his friends house to party. so I need to watch my brother... I was so heart broken. My friend ended up coming to my house and we drank wine coolers...but it wasnt the birthday I had in mind and wasnt excited about it anymore... I am turning 32 on the 14th this month and honestly dont even care. Even when I turned the big 30 I didnt care. I am in a relationship with inlaws who care, and every year ask me what i want for my birthday and what id like to do, but im just so not used to anything good coming of my birthday and not having plans go as expected that I cant tell them what i want. I ask them if we get a cake NOT to sing me the happy birthday song. it triggers me so badly I have panic attacks, and the last thing people want is extra salt on their cake im sure.
Even now that im older my mom is holding my inheritance over my head saying that when she dies I will only get my part of her land IF i move up there and take care of my brother... My brother who is 24 years old, can't read (He used to be able to read but my mom stopped his lessons at home), used to be able to count, doesnt drink water and pisses nearly yellow GREEN from all the soda he drinks, doesnt wipe his own ass (because she is afraid he wont wash his hands. SO WHEN HES DONE MAKE HIM DO IT. HE WILL LEARN ROUTINE!), doesnt brush his teeth, has an obsession with notebooks to write down game scores of football from people playing VIDEO GAMES ONLINE to the point his king size bed has them stacked 3 feet high and takes up the whole bed space so he sleeps on the floor, and if you touch those notebooks just to put them in storage he FLIPS OUT and will get violent. Why is it that I am being promised something ONLY if even after she is gone im still treated as a slave? I dont even WANT the land, I will gladly sell it to my step siblings and use it to buy my brother assistive live in nurse.
It's like the day he was born my life ended. I have severe depression because of this... At least my father is trying to mend our relationship after the divorce, but my mom treats me like a servant. And come to find out, my brother getting all the extra attention left me undiagnosed until this year. Guess their are two autistic kids in this bloodline.
That is... honestly disgusting to hear. I have a special needs sister myself, and my parents NEVER forced me to watch her unless it was... like a once a month 'Get away from the kids and the house' thing, which isn't that bad. Special Needs Kids doesn't mean they get all the attention. It just means they get special attention. It's sad and while my sister's condition will mean she always needs a caretaker, your brother's condition sounds like it could've been treated IF THEY HAD PUT IN THE WORK WHEN THEY COULD. But no, they instead had to be lazy, neglectful parents who have one kid that will always need help, and another who they have to blackmail just to help the first.
UTILIZE LE 4 GAUGE SHOOTGUN
Take a brick to his head and be done with it
That's why I'm for abortion
You don’t need the inheritance. You don’t need anything from her. Tell her to take her inheritance and spend it on care for your brother and cut her out of your life. Honestly it sounds like your in laws are enough family and you can always make new family. Don’t lose time over narcissists.
Bro, that story about the son getting the Happy Day broke me down instantly. Just the fact that the rest of his family seeing the mistreating and actually caring fir him and going out of their way as a collective to try and make some semblance of repaying OP got me weak. Good for him. Hopefully he can grow past it with their support.
I almost died 4 times as a baby yet I never got any "special" treatment. The parents are just so toxic
im glad youre okay and hopefully you were at least treated right.... these parents are just the worst. i can't even fathom that anyone can be so oblivious to the treatment of another child. and it doesn't seem like they would have cared to change anything until the family f i n a l l y stepped in and the daughter basically outed them with her banshee-like screams. jeez, a 6yo, maybe but 8? i was in no way a good kid but i knew better than to embarrass myself like that.
Bro you good?
@@SpaceAddress yeah I was born with fluid in my lungs, I couldn't breathe at birth
@@nidhi2693 I was thankfully and yeah the whole thing is just awful such bad parents
Oh dear glad to hear that you are ok.
That first story made my BLOOD BOIL! It’s stories like that that make me SO ANGRY. Those parents should be absolutely ashamed of themselves.
They need to make that story a movie honestly
@@idontmakecontent4870 I agree
"First story?" There was only one story.
@@sauvagess I realized that.
age 8 and she knows how to use the hammer. I wonder how big that hammer was? I am using my paranormal brain and I see a future single mother in the next 10 years jumping from D. to D. to D. and to gangbangs+ Ds. That kid is lost, beyond repair, the only solution would be to slap the living life out of her every time when does something that she shoudn't, I can't see any other options, and that "school", I don't think they will do too much good, nothing compares with an old good fashion "beaten to death", of course, this is only for lost kids, beyond any kind of normal repairs.
Ive come across this story, and I just hope that OP realizes it wasnt truly his sister's fault that she was like this; it was because of his parents that shes like this. And I also hope that OP's sister realizes that, with the help of a counselor and/or any friends she could make later on, what her parents did was NOT NORMAL and hopefully they can rebuild a connection later down the line. But for right now, the best thing is for OP to stay as far away as possible and rebuild from scratch
EDIT: Thinking on it now, it seems like the circumstances of OP's sister's birth most likely broke his parents. This is by no means a justification for their horrendous actions, and with this kind of PSYCHOTIC favoritism, they did also rob OP and his sister of any real sibling bond or connection. Both children are the victims of awful parenting and I do hope that both OP and his sister can reconcile later on
Cherishing someone you nearly lost doesn't mean spoiling them, it means looking out to make sure you don't lose them and appreciate the moments you got.
This is one instance where boarding school seems like one of the only options. That girl needs to be FAR away from her enabling parents.
You're not wrong... It just punctuates their laziness, though, imho. They couldn't be bothered to raise her right and they couldn't be bothered to get family therapy and work through their issues together. They never fail to push their problems onto others.
Oh absolutely! Perhaps that will teach her some manners. Maybe a member of the extended family can arrange this.
But if it doesn’t address the reasons for her behaviour she will just go back to be a brat again
That may very well be true, however the chances of fixing this amount of enablement looks pretty low unless that boarding school has top-notch staff and a psychiatrist on staff to help.
@@SelecaoOfMidas as for the parents I would describe them both as narcissists
First Story and only story (so some people here can’t stop crying over this): Wow, I can’t stand parents who play favorites. The fact that OP's parents really forced OP to do all of this all throughout OP's life. This is why parents like this always lose a kid for the rest of their lives. This kind of treatment caused OP's parents to raise a spoiled brat. Look at what this favoritism has caused, OP 100% hates his sister because OP's parents are such horrible parents. The other family members are no good neither; they seen all of this for 8 years and did nothing?! At least they somewhat redeemed themselves by going at these horrible people like that in OP's defense. I’m soooo glad the grandfather was man enough to admit the fact that they were in the wrong too for just watching all of this happening. Wtf?! This kid is an 8 year old and vandalized the car with a hammer?! Oh my god, these parents seriously shouldn’t have been parents in the first place. Oh god these people ruined two lives in a matter of years. They got exactly what they deserved for all the actions they chose to make. Not only did they lose one kid from their abuse, they lost both kids for their abuse. Honestly, I don’t think this sister will change and this pain they inflicted on OP will not heal no time soon. Oh man, what a story bro
Ong 🤣
good point lol, let's buckle up because it's gonna be a long ride
...bro how did you comment this so fast?
@@StarstormAnimationskeep refreshing on the app until the video pops up
Bro how did you respond two minutes ago and watched the first story before he posted
'i, an 18yo guy, started ugly crying-'
For any guy listening - you're allowed to feel and express emotion, bottling it til its unbearable isn't healthy
Lotta people turn angry as result, anger is still an emotion
The parents effectively ruined the child's morals and the teen's feelings. which are the two most important things in their respective age groups.
Thank you for reading this, RSlash. It's honestly fun to hear the longer stories.
It's amazing how much damage even an 8 year old can make when they are molded to be spoiled in every way. Future parents absolutely need to be careful how to raise children, because their actions can potentially make the next school shooter, serial murderer, or anything like that.
I know right? That's why I'm so afraid. I certainly want to be a mother, but I'm so scared of my future children growing up to be awful despite my best efforts.
@@PrincessQ-fj9ly That's a legit thing to be afraid of, yes, but at the same time, you shouldn't let your own fear rule you like that. Kids are people, and people come in all kinds of varieties. I've heard talk about "nature vs nurture", but I personally think that BOTH elements are equally important to how a child grows up. Each person is born differently, but it's always best for them to be treated lovingly by their parents. Sometimes you just have to be brave and see things through, hoping and trusting that things will turn out alright (after all, if you did let your fear rule you, it could negatively impact how you behave towards your kids, which would undoubtedly negatively effect them as well).
But of course, it's your life, and I'm just a stranger on the internet. I can only encourage you to make the best decisions for yourself as possible.
It's stories like these that reinforce the idea of having some kind of aptitude test to being a parent regardless of how they go about having one.
you sadly cant generalize that, given the circumstances of the birth. and doing an aptitude test retroactively is pointless.
Yeah, its no doubt that they screwed up but they were just responding to their own trauma. They "normalized" in their minds to a situation they never should have and it created a lot of pent up rage.
@@iMushu. a hysterectomy is far different than getting tubes tied but I get what you're saying. The closest thing one can do to what you've said would be supporting ones local Planned Parenthood, especially in this disgusting climate of conservatives going ban crazy on reproductive rights.
@@iMushu. depending on how they’re performed, tubal ligations and vasectomies can be reversed. However the success rates for pregnancy after the reversal don’t usually go back to 100%.
So there’s other factors that would stop your idea from being considered/adopted by society/governments other than the governments “need for slaves”.
yeah, someone need to make a law, where you need license to be a parent.....
I can kinda understand how this happened to the parents of OP, they were filled with so much fear of losing the little sister, the mom almost dying and them not being able to have kids anymore, that they started to obsess over the little sister's welfare, causing them to be blind-sighted to the welfare of OP. they needed mental health care to stop the trauma and they need it now even more. OP should also seek mental health care to deal with the whole situation, so he can move on with his live and not let it affect the rest of his live so much. Also the sister also needs mental health care at the boarding school. if she doesn't get help she will see this as "her parents and family don't love her anymore" and become a closed off, scheming, petty narcissist that can easily turn to drugs and manipulation of people to fill the gaping hole in side of her.
No way did that boy not tell them, yell at them, and argue with them what they have done.
There is NO way they haven't heard those same words from their kid. They only caved in to reality because of adult social pressure.
I’m not treated like this at all and neither are any of my family members. But I’m known in my family as the “Favorite Cousin” purely because I let my cousins do things their parents Don’t let them but I also teach them how to draw, game, code, play instruments, and anything they ask. I rarely say no to them and I’ve become a safe space for everyone not even my cousins but my friends as well. If I ever found out one of them was being treated like. Hell would break loose. I’m a fighter. I would call up my brothers and uncles (all of which are over 6’4) and there would be words said. Op didn’t deserve any of that and I wish them the best
What kind of coding
@@super_manul1167
Pretty sure @grilled-cheese means programming
@@nikolthomas2544 potato potato
If I had seen this favoritism with a child at someone else's birthday, I would call the parents out right away for it! While his relatives did step up they should have done so sooner. I'm pretty blunt when I see favoritism like that at all and usually will say something extremely sarcastic as to embarrass the offenders while making everyone else laugh at them. 8 years they saw this happening and nobody ever thought "This is odd that they do that? or "Is OP really okay with sharing his birthday like that?". Sadly, feels like everyone failed him for 8 years of his life even the ones who stood up in the end... Well they reaped what they sowed and since they only put love and energy into the spoiled child that is all they can sow. Glad OP is doing better now!
His friends did that's why they were no longer allowed to come. My god what fucking cunty parents, I hope they hate themselves the rest of their lives.
Honestly, I can't even stand seeing vids of kids blowing out candles for other kids. Like ffs move them, put them in another room, or just force them next to you until the birthday kid blows out their candles.
Hell, I'll make up a lore about the Cake Monster, who, when the birthday boy/girl blows out their candles he comes at night and gives a small gift, but if you're not the birthday boy/girl, he eats you.
Idc how many nightmares I cause.
And the whole "your parents told us you're ok with it" excuse doesn't hold water either. They may as well have said "Yeah we decided it was just easier to let your parents tell us what your state of mind was and take them at their word, and that coming to you to ask directly was just too inconvenient. Oopsie!"
And that's neverminding the whole idea of birthday celebrations in the first place. I don't celebrate birthdays and haven't for decades, but even I remember that birthdays are supposed to be about the one whose birthday it is and pretty sure I could recognize when the day is being gifted to someone else. Those relatives really have no excuse.
@@Univerzion Yoinking this. Thanks for the nightmare fuel for my future kids. I would honestly do the same.
@@ScooterBond1970 I had a shared birthday with my cousin(7m) when I was 5(f) because our parents split a McDonalds party package cost wise and even then you could tell it was two different parties mashed together! We each had our own cake, friends/guests, and gifts so we didn't care because it was even the entire time but this is not a shared party and there is no indication that it is OP's birthday at all! My question is what they planned on doing at others parties since 8 is the age to start going to friends parties... Were they going to ask the birthday kid if they don't mind??? Pretty sure I heard an entitled parent post like that with a little boy would throw a fit if they didn't get to blow out the candles of everyone else's cake. (I think at one point they had to hold the kid back because he was crawling over the table to still try.)
My parents were only a tiny bit abusive and it messed me up pretty bad. I can only imagine the sort of trauma this OP is going to have to work through in adult life. Glad he’s out of there.
Same boat here. My mom was verbally and physically abusive. I’m her best child in her eyes because she was able to mold me into this submissive, non-troublemaker, and quiet person. I have confidence issues and because of her, I’m known as the “stupid one” in the family. One day, I’ll confront her for all the wrong that she has done to me.
@@JayJaytheweird I'm really sorry you had to go through all that, and I hope that somehow, you're in a better place today. At the very least, that you're living apart from your mother. Maybe you can try typing out a whole letter/email so you can gather your thoughts? Of course, be careful not to release it until you're ready (either save it to a hard drive or keep on deleting it until you have it memorized). Just a suggestion, though. You don't have to take any advice from a stranger here.
And the sister is ruined too now, because I doubt anyone in that family will go to therapy, so the sister went from having too much attention to being punished, and probably has no emotional supports at an institution like a boarding school to deal with the challenge of becoming a better person so will just turn into a bitter husk like the brother was on track to become. My mother used to work in higher ed and talks about challenges and supports - you need challenges to grow as a person but you also need supports, preferably in the form of mature, emotionally healthy adults in your life, and the sister doesn't have any of those unless the relatives get involved in her life the way they did in the brothers. At least the brother's emotional state is going to get better so there is one person who won't be miserable, but it's still sad knowing there are three people who are messed up and miserable.
Those parents deserve every ounce of the misery they got. I hope the OP never just forgives them, and the tantrum child gets a dose of reality.
I actually cried for OP, I'm so happy he got his happy ending at last! I can't believe how people can neglect their kid like this, the amount of time OP will need to heal is gigantic, that is if he ever recovers at all. I fully support cutting the parents out for good, he doesn't need them, he can make meaningful connections with people worth his time. I hope the future smiles for OP! ♥
And I hope the sister and the parents *NEVER* see the end of this!
@@tawnyacosta9091 tbh, i hope the sister will come to realize that her behavior and lifestyle is wrong. and once she realizes that, it's ok to leave things behind on her part. she was only raised to be such a spoiled princess.
the parents on the other hand should have to live with the fact that both their son and their daughter might keep their distance long-term.
(i mention the daughter because it is possible that once she realizes how badly she was raised, she might grow some resentment to her parents for having raised her into such a position with a potential social stigma)
keep in mind, people can always change given the right (mostly traumatic) events
@@tawnyacosta9091 Heck yeah. I wish his sister come to realize the damage she did to her brother.. but tbh I don't see that happening.
Me too. After a sad childhood that he had, he deserves all the happiness in the world in his adulthood. And I also support OP cutting ties with his parents permanently. That'll show them how badly they failed him.
@@PrincessQ-fj9ly I agree! He needs to cut all ties with those kinds of people for good. He doesn’t need that in his life!
Holy shit, these parents have not only abused their son for so long, but ruined what relationship they could have had for probably the rest of their lives. It's sad that this happens in lots of entitled families. There's always one good egg that gets valued less, then gets punished after having the right to speak up about it. Good on the family members for stepping up to help make this right. OP's sister is going to have a rough life after being raised spoiled~
Yeah. Another perfect example of a couple who shouldn't have had children, sadly. If you are going to favor a child just because you almost lost them in childbirth, then do us all(and yourself) a favor and seek professional help. Or just don't have anymore children.
all it took was a decade of the relatives turning a blind eye and ignoring all the complete discomfort and unhappiness of the op until he finally snapped for them to make it right or as i call it trying to buy the ops love back
agree, childhood memories stuck for a long time, or even entire live
The parents knew what they were doing. Stopping OP’s friends from coming because they would call them out, hiding the cake from relatives, telling the relatives that OP was okay with it. They knew what they were doing. They woke up every single day and said “we will spoil one child and neglect the other”
I am kinda glad their other family eventually came around and understood what was happening. You see stories like this a lot and this is one of the better outcomes I've heard. Their entire family yelled at the parents.
First story: OPs parents really did a bad job here. Blantent favoritism towards their daughter caused this.
Edit: oof on my part.
Lol there's only 1 story this video.
"Did a bad job"? Now that's an understatement of the century. More like they have utterly failed OP as parents.
@@flamingdeathbanana Oof on my part.
@@dracko158 and they failed his sister as well. I hope OP manages to live his best life possible and maybe one day get to enjoy his birthdays 🥳
"First story?" There was only one story.
Damn, that story made me cry in absolute grief for OP. At 18, he's BARELY an adult. Some would consider him still a child and he was abused bad enough for 8 FUCKING YEARS that his 18th, which should have been ABSOLUTELY SPECIAL caused him to break down. His family is AWFUL, though the extended family somewhat redeemed themselves. The parents can NEVER hope to redeem themselves. They created a MONSTER in the daughter and it seems like that probably isn't going to ever be undone. She'll be an entitled Karen as an adult because they treated her like a spoiled princess during her most important formative years. Boarding school isn't going to help her. She'll just hate her parents now, too.
The story about the sister could have been written about my husband. Except his parents have never apologized, and whenever I've tried to confront them, they throw tantrums.
See their tantrums for the white noise they are and going NC with the in-laws may be an option.
I would love to hear the full story
Ok normally, I don’t like entitled parent stories, but this one is pure gold! Especially how miserable the parents became at the end. They definitely deserved that.
That first story honestly reminds me of my own childhood, my brother was the favourite golden child, he was treated like a king, my mother encouraged he psychologically and physically abuse me, so I was forced to bring him up as if he were my own child whilst he was allowed to strangle me, smash my head into walls, punch me on the body (not the face because folk would see bruises). My birthday eventually became a PTSD trigger date because I would be screamed at, harassed, beaten, I wasn’t allowed to celebrate my own birthday because my mother couldn’t imagine allowing me to have one day that didn’t revolve around my brother.
Just before 19 I got helped by a young persons charity to help me escape, where my mother and brother told family members I was just “ungrateful”, “spiteful”, and “jealous”. Thing is folk in my life had seen the abuse, they’d seen the physical abuse, the heard the screaming, I had one friend walk me home from work on my 18th birthday (I chose to work on purpose knowing I couldn’t celebrate my birthday) and my brother immediately started screaming at me and trying to assault me, I had friends throughout childhood witness the behaviour from my neglectful mother and how she favoured going out with random dudes and forcing me to bring up her son, and I had friends who’d been at the violent end of my brothers tempers.
So I escaped as soon as I could just before 19, yet my mother tried telling her family I was just “ungrateful”, “jealous”, “spiteful”, “making it up for attention”, thing is I just escaped and didn’t say anything, I needed to be free from the physical violence that left me in hospital with concussions several times, yet for some reason putting myself first meant my mother attempting to slander me. As an adult I had very little contact and her sisters, my aunts, tried to guilt trip me hardcore, so I dropped the longest blast on social media, with plenty evidence, where folk commented as witnesses to the violence, the favouritism, the homophobia, the ableism, how folk had literally seen the abuse with their own eyes.
Apparently they were all “liars”, y’know, everyone who’d known my brother since childhood and had faced his abuse? All liars. The women he got black out drunk and took advantage of? Liars. The women he harassed at work who were told by my mother they “deserved it” for rejecting my brother? Liars. Folk who’d seen and heard my mother and brother weaponise my disabilities and had to comfort me as I poured my heart out? Liars. The folk who’d had money stolen by my brother who was an alcoholic with a gambling addiction? Liars. The literal police reports about his physical violence to me and other women? Liars. The police reports about his various wire/bank frauds, where he’s banned from several Scottish banks from ever holding an account? Also liars.
Everyone was apparently a liar, even with a mountain of evidence my mother tried to make everyone out as “bullies”, because he was being held accountable, folk could see her style of “parenting”, where she’d always defend his actions, where she called his homophobia and ableism towards me as “a difference of opinion” (actual hate crime in Scotland, but sure!), how we were all “sensitive” and “couldn’t take jokes”. Folk who’d witnessed his behaviour or been at the violent end of his behaviour? “Didn’t know what they were talking about.”
So every year on my birthday I have to repost the long social media post with evidence, leave it publicly on my profile with a note of “if you’re coming here from my mothers page because she’s made yet another post on my birthday saying “happy birthday to my ungrateful daughter”, this is not a hallmark film where the estranged family member comes back and everyone is happy, I cut contact with my abusive mother and brother for many reasons, don’t come to my profile on behalf of my abusive mother”. And every year, without fail, someone does it anyone and I forward the post to them, and I always get a reply of “sorry I didn’t know”. Of course you didn’t, she won’t ever admit she was a terrible mother, she will continue to act like she’s the victim because I put myself first for once.
Parenting like this destroys relationships for life, they become unrecoverable. It’s especially hurtful knowing folk just stood by and watched this behaviour happen as you grew up, these folk then act like you have no reason to cut contact and are shocked when you go AWOL.
I stopped celebrating my birthday by about 13, by 16 I expected physical violence and abuse, by 18 it was just outright hatred from my brother where as soon as I came home from work he was screaming abuse, shouting slurs, trying to beat me. I was with my friend who’d walked me after work (we finished work at the same time) and he was so angry at my brother. My brother behaved like this openly because he knew my mother didn’t care and nothing would be done, because when he assaulted me, strangled me, knocked me out, I was always told it was my fault and I was “being dramatic” (when asking for an ambulance due to concussions and strangulation), my friend was just angry at this behaviour and he noticed my brother immediately retreated into his shell when a man challenged him. Even after stopping his abuse it didn’t matter, I’d stopped celebrating my birthday because of this abuse, it became a PTSD trigger date because of the abuse, for me my birthday was a day of misery and violence.
I’m 32 now, all those memories are clear as day because of my PTSD, so even after long escaping my family? I still get to live with that wonderful trauma that was inflicted on me every single birthday, and just in general because my life was made to be a living hell, forced to bring up my brother as if he were my child whilst expected to endure his abuse which was encouraged by my mother, where I was neglected in favour of her going out with random dudes, where I was never a priority, I was never made to feel loved, and I certainly never felt safe, where even after cutting contact maybe 6 years ago I still cannot celebrate my own birthday because I expect something to happen. It stays with you.
@@sauvagess Enough! We get it! There's only one story! Can you stop with the spamming now?!
I'm so sorry you went through that.
I wish you nothing but happiness and good health.
Stay strong and leave those awful people in the past.
Damn. I hope you're brother and mother get their comeuppance soon. I hope you're able to someday heal from this in some way. I wish you nothing but the best for the future. ♥️
OP I'm so fucking sorry that happened to you. Glad you're in a better place and cut contact.
🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂 I wanna cry. I wanna find your family and hurt them. How dare they!! You are amazing and strong. I truly admire you. I hope you're doing much better. Always remember you're amazing and loved and appreciated. If not by your egg doner then by me and everyone else who cares about you.
I grew up with my younger sister who was "the golden child". She got whatever she wanted. As an adult later in life she hated our parents, especially Dad. All three are gone now. Life is peaceful.
OP's sister needs to have her arse blistered but good! 😡
Id like to know more
jeese can she find a job?
I also have a feeling when the parents say that the sister was being “bullied”at school
I think the real story behind it was that seeing how the sister behaved at her brothers party it wouldn’t surprise me that she was displaying this kind of behavior at other kids parties in her classroom, as well to the point, where, nobody in her class wanted to associate let alone invite her to anymore parties I can just imagine the grief and embarrassment of the parents having to be called to come and get their spoiled princess brat daughter from those parties because of her behavior. It honestly wouldn’t surprise me if she tried to pull the stunt at other relatives parties. Even worse it wouldn’t be more surprising before being called out by relatives ,if the parents reputation and social status was already down the toilet whenever they were invited to other events by neighbors etc. in the past and the daughter still caused a huge scene to were eventually even the parents were no longer invited to come celebrate events with others.
Nope. I experienced that growing up the worst thing about that is not only ruining every single person in the family, but also depriving OP of a sibling. I grew up with a spoilt sibling and my jealousy and discontent was so strong that I couldn’t feel love for him, only anger, frustration and more jealousy. It was only after we grew up did he realize the shit I went through and we started to develop a close relationship. After that I regret all the years of me hating him, because it wasn’t his fault! He was only a kid and so was I! It was supposed to be our parents who gave us both love. Instead he got all the love but was deprived of love from me and I didn’t get any and need to do decades of therapy to fix it.
I was born almost dying. Im the youngest. My parents NEVER treated me as the favorite. HOLY FUCKING HELL. WHAT THE HELL IS THAT DEMON DOING! Shes not even considered a kid imo. DEMON
It's kinda weird, because I'm from Europe and my country's literary history is just filled with stories about the youngest son having to overcome a lot of crap because the first-born got all the first picks of everything.
Seems that these days, the tables have turned ^^
@@Nerobyrne im from Europe too. If im honest my older sister is kinda the favorite. But idc
When I was a kid (3) I got E. Coli and almost died in my mom’s arms. I don’t get treated better or worse than my twin
Not only did those 2 disgusting and horrible people ruin the lives of their children, they ruined their own lives as well. The whole extended family hates them, including their own children.
I'm so glad OP is doing much better and he moved away from them. If I was him, I'd go no contact effective immediately and never speak to them ever again, what disgusting wastes of oxygen.
I hope the sister get's the absolute worst in Boarding School, because she sounds like a monster.
I really hope OP can recover and go on to have a happy life. As for his parents and sister, I hope that they end being absolutely miserable for the rest of their lives.
I feel for the OP, he didn’t deserve any of the bullshit and went through 8 YEARS of it, and only got a shitty apology that was only prompted to apologize after being hounded by their relatives. I wouldnt have even invited the parents or sister to his party. Those parents failed both of their kids. Sure the sister’s absolutely horrid, but their parents did not raise her right AT ALL.
These horrible parents stories make me glad that I was raised by good parents
Same.
Ditto.
You are lucky bro
I resonate a lot with this story. My older sister was a massive princess, and got everything she wanted as soon as she asked. It wasn’t nearly as bad as OP’s situation though. She lied every other breath, bossed me around, and cried when she didn’t get what she wanted. When I say cried, I mean full on wailing like a banshee. When she was younger she once screamed so hard that her face turned blue, and she passed out. No, I’m not joking. If I got a present that she perceived as better than a present she got, she’d pout the rest of the day, and half of the next day. She would hit me over completely asinine reasons, and yell at me if I upset her or contradicted her. If we were having an argument and I was winning, which was a lot because she had no debate skills, she would plug her ears and go “LALALALALALA!” She did this until 16/17. Once I got old enough to call her out on her lies, which wasn’t really old at all I was around 7, she was around 9, her whole house of cards collapsed on top of her. She tried to lie more to cover up the previous lies, but I would just be able to prove that she was lying, and she just couldn’t stop. Whenever she would hit me, our dad would punish her and warn her “One day, he’s gonna be bigger than you, and you’ll regret hitting him.” And finally, one day came when she tried to hit me, I blocked her and hit her back. She wailed and screamed to our dad who simply said “I told you.” I think that’s when reality finally hit her right in the face, and she started acting less like a princess. She stopped lying as much, she never hit me again, stopped bossing me around, etc.
Favouritism parents are an automatic 5 out of 5 for me like why disregard your other kids feelings and only focus on the kid you like?!
Some, like this story, almost lose a kid and/or the kid has severe developmental disabilities so to make up for life's sorrows, they give the kid whatever and don't discipline them. Other times, ableism, ageism, or sexism factors into it. Sometimes one kid just happens to more closely align with the parent's idealized dream child than the other.
Whatever the reason though, it's wrong. Parents shouldn't have kids if they only want to raise their dream child. Because what's worse than raising a "problem child"? Being that "problem child" who grows up unloved and neglected because they exist in a way their parents don't like
When he broke down and cried. I bursted out crying too. I felt for him. I’m so glad his family had his back once he expressed himself
Notice how he doesn't ever say anything bad really about this sister, he always goes "they let her ____" or "my parents made me ____ ". He knows that there wouldn't be anything wrong with this sister if this parents didn't allow it. He doesn't dislike the sister. If I'm wrong I'll edit becaus3 I'm re listening
My brother smashed my door when he was just 3 years old. Little children can have so much energy when they have a trantrum. Never underestimate a little childs tantrum.
Truth, kids get hyper stronger if pissed off.
I must admit. I nearly cried to the part where the whole family surprised him with a party just for him.
He didn't wanted another birthday, so they didn't made one, but another party all just for him.
Quite honestly, these parents deserve FAR worse than they got for this. They deserve to lose custody of the daughter, among many other things. Hopefully boarding school, among other things, can turn her around to the point where she might actually have a chance at being a functioning adult. And yeah...OP's other relatives fucked up catastrophically, but at least they're trying to make up for it.
If the daughter is that bad about boarding school I would pay to see her at a military school and see how long her attitude would last then
Story 1: I feel so bad for OP. BUT I also feel bad for the girl. Her parents are awful. She literally doesn't know any different. She was just living her life as she always had. Then her brother just starts crying at me of her parties and all of a sudden her life is completely wrecked, she's yanked from her home and everything is different. All of this through literally no fault of her own.
Even the actions we normally say are a person's responsibility, I can't say here. As far as she was concerned,, this is the way things worked. Her parent not only didn't teach her any better, they literally taught her to be that way. Then when she acts the way she was taught...they punish her.
Think of it like this: you get a puppy. You teach that puppy that there is a spot for them to pee and poo. You do everything you can to teach them and they learn. they always poo on that one spot and they know "I go poo here. "this is where I go poo. Master likes it when I go poo here. They don't like it when I go poo anywhere else."
and then one day out of nowhere, they poo in their spot and you smack them, call them a bad dog, and send the to the pound.
That's what happened to that girl but it's even worse obviously. She was just as abused as OP but they did her a massive disservice and now she's getting punished for their fuck up. She obviously needs help, but the parents are the ones who needed to be sent away.
Also...boarding school is only part of the solution. She needs THERAPY
^^This^^ You explained it perfectly. They’ve ruined both of their kids’ lives.
I was thinking the exact same things, minus the dog analogy. It's just heartbreaking all around. The boy suffered for the rest of his childhood and then some. He didn't even get to enjoy having a sibling, which is such a wonderful thing to have.
The girl was just 8 or so when being suddenly sent away from all that she knew and loved, presumably for the rest of HER childhood, so there goes her life, too. You can't come back normal from being treated that way.
These kids should have both been treasured, loved, and raised right. The parents stole their childhoods and their potantial bond. They were selfish and lazy. They still had the chance to do right be their little girl but they didn't want to out in the time and effort for her, choosing to treat her like she wasn't even worth it instead. When she needed love and direction the most, they just threw her away for someone else to deal with. She could have been raised well from then on, after they knew what they did wrong.
I never thought I'd say this about anybody but I'm glad they couldn't have any more kids after that. They clearly didn't give a shit anyway.
Those poor kids. This story sucked. People suck. Now I'm near tears and mad and ranting over a couple of total strangers.
I wish there were more good people in the world. There is so much evil on earth now.
So much needless suffering, damage, and disconnect. I don't even know what kind of world my kids will inherit any more. Whatever it is, I hope it's put right before they're old enough to have kids of their own, and that by then, everyone can just live in peace and light, neighbors and all.
Anyway... ranting over.
I'm off to pet a baby bunny or do something else that is only good, to distract and rid myself of this story for a while. That's enough internet for the day, I'd say.
At the end when the parents are miserable, I'll admit that I take some pleasure knowing that they are miserable.
Probably because they deserve the misery and mess they've created from playing favorites.
when op said he didn't take delight in his parent's misery i was like, you absolutely should
@@varahunter68 I honestly don't take delight in other people's misery either, so I can relate to OP there. But, at the same time, I don't have ANY sympathy for OP's parents whatsoever. They made their bed. And now it's time for them to lie in it together and they don't get to complain how cold or dirty it is.
My mom had this tradition where whenever one sibling had a birthday our siblings would each get one (1) present each, to make things "fair", but all the rest of the gifts, cake, and party theme were always for the birthday kid. I'm so sorry you had to go through that dude
And the present the non-birthday kids got was never expensive either - you'd get like one toy worth like $10 from the grocery store or something, and birthday kid would get like tech or cds or a videogame etc - and we always knew that when the next kid's birthday came along the rest of us would all get a little something on the cheap too. I've always loved the tradition, it really was pretty even-handed I think, and my siblings who have kids have continued it with no problems. But we never had it be so favoritist, the cheap toy stopped the temper tantrums when we were younger w/o spoiling anybody
I have 4 kids and the thought that I would treat one differently than the other 3 hurts me, because I value my relationship with all of them, and I want them to have a better childhood than I did since I was the middle child, forgotten and having to fend for myself and teach myself since I was six years old.
Yeah, these videos are a good lesson in what not to become, and what to watch out for
I've had conversations with people before about spoiled brats, where I've said that I think kids that are never told "no" grow up to become a danger to others around them, because they're going to hear "no" for the first time as an adult, not know how to handle it, and hurt someone. Some people look at me like I'm crazy when I say this, but this story is EXACTLY what I'm talking about. I'm glad the rest of the family intervened when they did, and I hope it's not too late for the sister.
I used to nanny for really wealthy families via a company that paid me bare bone minimum wage and let me tell you that I've been abused by 8 year olds and younger: intentionally kicked in the face, having hands full of snot and pleghm smeared over my clothes, being slapped across the cheek, being called poor, fat, ugly, or even treated like a servant to be yelled at. I was a 24 year old overqualified graduate who was saving up for a masters degree and I was already miserable, I cannot FATHOM the poor boy having to deal with that kind of behaviour of an 8 year old under his own damn roof, neglected by his own parents... poor kid, I hope he is doing better and is saving up for therapy. Bc that is some serious d a m a g e .
As someone who has also been an entitled brat who went through a strict psychological behavioral school. Not just a boarding school, behavioral school. We had kids who jumped off roofs there, amongst other things. That place was a mess, I broke contact with everyone I met there because I just can’t associate with them anymore.
Anyway, as someone’s in a similar position to the sister. Yes, she has already been damaged permanently and this trauma will stay with her for her entire life. But boarding school will also dull the edges of that trauma and her behavior. Hopefully enough that she becomes a functional member of society. And a decent human being. Something I still struggle to this day.
The fact that the parents had NO problem with not only playing favorites with OP’s sister, but to just push OP aside AND made OP’s birthdays the SISTER’S “Special Days” BY FORCE is utterly disgusting!
And the fact that the rest of OP’s family DEFENDING the parents’ pure neglect is even WORSE!
I say that OP shouldn’t have to forgive his family for what they did, after what they did. They suddenly decided to step in and defended OP AFTER OP told his side of the story, too little too late would’ve been my excuse.
BUT I’m glad that OP’s family FINALLY heard OP’s side of the story AND OP for standing up for himself and telling them EVERYTHING.
The parents are just majorly butt hurt because they can’t neglect OP and treat him like crap anymore, and Sister’s just the entitled, spoiled rotten, lil princess monster that THEY created after YEARS of giving her their attention and not giving BOTH kids equal love.
Served those entitled parents right!
They’re gonna have HELL when the Sister hits her preteens and teens! She’s gonna be the pre adult version of ANGELICA PICKLES from the Rugrats!
As for OP, I’m pretty sure his trust with the rest of his family is still a bit shaky, but their bonds are gonna grow stronger.
OP, hope you cut your toxic parents out of your life. They don’t deserve you.
Also, I heard this story before, wasn’t OP’s sibling a brother? I think the gender might’ve changed for safety reasons. Either that or I might’ve heard a story that’s something like this, but different with a little brother.
Either way, OP’s parents are TOXICALLY DISGUSTING!
The family is the MVP for siding with OP here. OP's mom and dad failed as parents.
an MVP 8 years in the making...
I can’t stand when parent’s basically completely screw up their kids through shameless favoritism and not think it’ll come back to bite them. But then cant comprehend why or where things went wrong when their child either doesn’t live up to their expectations (except being entitled), won’t speak to them, and that they completely ruined their familial circles when others either become away or fully call out the blatant favoritism. And then the fact they also refuse to acknowledge their wrongdoings makes it worse. These parents reaped what they sowed and hand to face the music
as smaller kids we were given a small "non birthday present", it wasn't an equalizer or to distract our attention, we were actively involved in making a sibling's birthday special (help wrap presents, prep for a party etc) and it was a little treat for being helpfull to reinforce that helping making others happy was a good thing to do (I'm talking when we were about 3-8 year olds, although the tradition did carry on just because tradition) we were always involved as much as is age apropriate with preparing stuff, and encouraged to talk about how happy our birthday had been and how we'd like our sibling to be happy like that
I feel sorry for both kids. The parents have irreparably damaged both, and both will need tremendous amounts of therapy to recover from the horrendous parenting they've suffered.
It's easy to look at the girl and say she's a sociopath, or pooh-pooh the idea of her "suffering", but like.. she's eight. And she's clearly miserable. Can you imagine having that much anger at eight years old? Not having any real structure, no boundaries, not being able to enjoy someone else's birthday party because its not about you? This kid isn't enjoying life. She isn't happy. She isn't emotionally developed. There's no way she has friends at school because clearly everything has to be about her all the time.
What a lonely way to be.
That story legit made me tear up. I'm glad OP at least has a good extended family to stick up for him. Now that he's away, I hope he's able to heal from this.
Jeez, This story actually made me really angry. The parents are absolutely terrible and repulsive parents and the only reason why they’re sorry and ‘Feel bad’ it’s because they didn’t get away with it.
Not only did they ruin OPs life but also the daughters for not raising her right.
They really did ruin the lives of both kids. The fact she'll be there for so long means she really has been ruined. And OP will never be able to have any celebration without remembering how he was treated by them. So messed up.
I honestly feel bad for the sister. Her life is going to be so difficult if she continues being an entitled brat. It’s not her fault her parents spoiled her so much.
Edit: after the vandalism of the car, I’m not as sympathetic. They raised a monster. I’m glad the parents are actually trying now.
I pretty much lost all my birthdays because my parents refused to eat anything but Chinese food for my birthday until the pandemic hit. It was made worse by the fact that I was also guilted into relatives not being able to feel full from eating anything that wasn't Chinese food either. To this day, I still resent my birthday and choose not to celebrate it.
Gosh that sucks. :(
Sorry your birthday has such negative memories around it. I hope you pick another random day of the year and celebrate your existence on this earth then-preferably with a full-on gourmet meal of any cuisine *but* Chinese!
I'm sorry you deserve so much better 🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂
Sorry for the situation but I’d be lying if I said I ain’t wish we could switch places on that spectrum
I just personally love Chinese food
@@JosieJOK I tend to celebrate it on a Sunday lunch before or after with a few close friends.
I don't mind Chinese food in general, but the problem is that they are always fixated on one of three local restaurants here that all essentially serve the same thing. For many years, my dad also tried to control what everyone ordered. Then, he would complain that people wouldn't eat the things that he picked. One year I finally got fed up with it and told him that if he's changing the order to that (he insisted on Black Bean/Green Onion Clams and standard Chinese Hainan chicken instead of Butter/Garlic Clams and Soy Sauce Chicken), he's eating all of it himself because neither I nor my brother was going to touch it.
It seems like the only thing that made the parents reconsider what they were doing was the massive backlash from the rest of the family. You know, Little Miss rSlash is lucky that Daddy has all these examples of what not to do as a parent.
I'm afraid that OP's sister won't learn any empathy at boarding school, or likely ever. She'll always blame her parents and brother for denying her "right" to everything she wanted. I feel sorry for anyone in the future who has the misfortune to encounter her.
Although it's sad that the family was oblivious for so long, I'm glad they acted as they did when they found out.. and I couldn't help but laugh with those "Ahem"s!
First story: I can relate to this. Basically, my young brother was born with half a heart, and on my 18th birthday, my mom allowed him to blow out the candles first. I was upset, because not only did he blow out the candles on my 18th birthday cake first, but that was my first birthday cake in eight years! I didn't make a scene besides, "The moment's ruined because he blew it out, even if you relit the candles, Mom." I did blow out the candles after they were relit, but the moment didn't feel as special. He's about as spoiled as this girl in the story.
That first story is the text book definition of “Too little, Too late”.
"First story?" There was only one story.
Can we get some Aye Whole scores for them?
OP: 0.
Extended family: 0. The parents were lying about the situation at home.
The sister: 3.5. It would be higher, but she was raised that way, and the parents are to blame.
The parents: 4.5. The only reason they aren’t 5 is that they were capable of shame, and took the initial steps to reform the three of them.
I can't even begin to imagine the pain op had to go through for ten (or was it eight) years. I'm glad op got to live on his own and his family members actually took his side. Too bad it was way too late. His parents are absolutely disgusting and horrible, I also feel sorry for the sister. Being spoiled sucks in the real world and she is in for it.
Grandpa had the balls to state out loud that there wasn't an adult in OP's life who hadn't failed him here. THE DAY OF THE FALLOUT. Not coming back later, not needing time to reflect. His eyes and ears were blasted wide open. I feel at least a little for him. He's been wrong for years, but at least he openly admits to it and takes up as much work on it as possible. I think that's worth something.
IDK if that sister is redeemable. I want to say yes. She's young, and young folk tend to bounce back better and adapt more to change. But that's a tendency. One that wasn't ever fostered in her by the sounds of it. If you've never had to change ever in your life, learning how is a hell of a task.
I hope they put her in therapy and parents also take therapy and parenting classes too. Because 8 is old enough to know more or less what you can get away with when it comes to parents. She fully expected whatever punishment she *might* receive as being worth the cost of hammering OP's car. Then again, with the entitlement and straight up child abuse through spoiling, she may have been delusioned enough to actually think it would get her a car.
And I just...cannot get over any of it.
The story really made me happy, people actually listened and changed, I hope it stays like this
Especially how the parents were changed into mentally broken wrecks.
My reading was it was too little too late. One half-assed gesture forced at metaphorical gunpoint does not undo 8 years of psychological abuse and neglect. The relationship between OP and his parents is almost certainly dead.
And then there's the collateral damage of somebody who reaches the age of 8 and has learned to be so entitled that she throws a tantrum over her brother getting a car! And their solution? Abdicate all responsibility and ship her off to a boarding school so that somebody else can do the job of raising her that they've failed so hard at. That relationship's going to be strained too and I wouldn't be surprised if it also dies. I only hope the boarding school can do some kind of salvage job on the sister, because by now it might be too late for her too and she could be destined to become a uberKaren in adulthood.
@@PassiveSmoking Already sounds like a sociopath in the making. No sense of right or wrong and zero remorse
I personally don’t think they changed. They were forced to apologise by their extended family and I even doubt that the second party was their idea in the first place. I would give it till the end of the school year and the sister will be back and their behaviour will revert to their old ways
Now that I really think about it, in many ways (though far less extreme than in the story) my little brother was the spoiled brat of the family. From a young age he started showing brat-itis, breaking our toys & other things if he wasn't allowed to play with them. There was a fair bit of the typical "include your younger brother in xyz" directives from our parents, which we'd try to do, but he didn't like games with rules & would often throw violent tantrums if he lost.
None of this would be hugely different than other kids growing up with siblings, except for when it came to rules & punishments - which kept getting watered down to almost _homeopathic_ levels for him, while ours got stricter (as we "...were mature enough to know better...").
Things eventually came to a head when he was about 13 & (admittedly after being teased by him) had a tantrum which included attacking the locked door of my middle brothers bedroom with an axe.
(A lot of private family stuff, including some psych stuff (obviously) happened after that & now, decades later, I rarely see or talk to him.)
You can tell that as rSlash was reading he got more and more invested in that last story since as OP he was yelling too and it conveyed so much more emotion had he read it normally