r/AITA My Parents Stole My Entire Life from Me
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- čas přidán 24. 07. 2024
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0:00 Intro
0:19 Family situation
3:54 Breathing
8:03 Apologizing
11:44 The truth
15:41 Wrong date
"Sneaky Snitch" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) License: CC By Attribution 3.0 - Komedie
How the fuck did all 3 adults forget to tell the 16 year old about the baby's condition?!
Yeah that was irresponsible on all of them. OP could possibly be absolved if his wife volunteered to inform Daisy. Even then he should’ve sent a reminder message. Also OPs mom or MIL might have assumed that Daisy was informed.
Because not only they are all incompetent. The wife doesn't care about anyone or anything but saving money.
This!
I have a thing, apparently, when I kind of just stop breathing for long periods of time while I am sleeping (my father does the same). My mother always made sure to tell every sitter that was the case, even though most would not interact with me once I was in bed (usually only if I had a bad dream, etc. and called for the sitter and then I was awake). But my mother still made sure to let them know I was OK just in case.
Really, I'm now an adult and if I'm sharing a hotel room, camping with people, or otherwise in a situation when I'm sharing sleeping space with other adults I still let them know that this is A Thing for me so they don't worry in case they are awake while I am sleeping. A couple mentioned they got up to use the washroom, etc. and were glad I mentioned it because it happened and they would otherwise have been really worried about me.
I will say OP doesn't need a butthole score. BECAUSE while he did neglect to mention it, he sided with the babysitter because HEY! We didn't tell her about the baby's condition so stop going off on the babysitter and turn to yourself. OP gets 0/5 to me. Mom and wife... don't think so.
I guess everyone thought the other one did
“Why’d you call 911? He throws tantrums where he holds his breath”
“WHY THE FUCK WAS THAT INFORMATION NOT PROVIDED IN ORIENTATION?!?!?
To be fair the parents were so convinced it was normal (probably by the doctors) that the baby sitter would know. The only person I blame is the wife.
This is information that WOULD HAVE BEEN USEFUL TO ME *YESTERDAY*
@@end_slayer I’ve heard of kids holding their breath when mad. Guess I always thought when they said “till he was blue in the face” was an exaggeration.
Story 2: There's something seriously wrong with your wife. Who the hell gets mad at a babysitter for calling 911 for a non-breathing baby that turned blue and passed out, just because they have to pay for an ambulance. You are so damn lucky her mom didn't bang on your door ready to curse the two of you out for your wife's ridiculous over reaction to a 16-year-old being scared that a baby was dying because no one told her this it's a normal thing that happens with your child, and your wife had to pay for an ambulance. You call her and apologize then pay her damn money plus extra for putting up with that crap. Oh and also be prepared to beg because if she goes public with what happened, you are so going to be blacklisted from every babysitter.
Right? OP sounded very understanding and while I agree that he/his wife were responsible for making sure Daisy knew about the baby's breath-holding episodes (instead of him putting it off on his mom), he also was understanding of the situation. He felt like Daisy did the right thing and told his wife she was overreacting. Is wifey suffering from PPD or something and that's why she's reacting so poorly? Who knows but she needs help.
OPs wife is trying to make it a "you must defend ME against HER" moment, notice the "rethink priorities" comment at the end there... OPs wife wants to be the number 1 priority even when wrong, ignoring that OPs priority is the children including the babysitter (16 is still a kid really). OPs wife is unhinged here.
And yeah, I cant imagine the rage my brother would do if somebody screamed at his kid like that over calling an ambulance for a baby who is turning blue, 100% they are lucky they didnt have the babysitters parent(s) giving them both barrels.
Though once again, the sad state of private healthcare where you have to pay for an ambulance coming to your house...
Got a question why the heck does the kid just stop breathing randomly that is not normal
@@spikeripper1 All sorts of medical conditions can cause these issues, unless OP says which, cant really say.
How much you guys want to bet she didn't tell daisy on purpose just so she have a reason to fire her, like the mom and OP I get because random things come up and you forget but the WIFE she should have gone " okay your taking care of my kids so I need to inform you on this VERY IMPONTANT THING so the baby have this breathing ep you just wait till he snap out of it or blow on his face don't panic okay?" but no she maybe purposely didn't tell her this info why? idk
Story 1: as someone with autism op you need to run now or they'll rope you in and never let you go, your cousin requires specialist care not an abused kid.
Also it's not a sacrifice when you're not given a choice.
Yep, they just want OP to basically be a free live in nanny. They need to RUN from that situation
@@TomDarkwulf87and tell him to do more while completely undermining that he is the glue holding the family together. Have they ever rewarded OP? Doubt it! Have they ever thanked him? Unlikely!
Same, if I was in OP's situation I would have told CPS.
Also - even IF OP were a trained specialist, having only 1 person do the care taking is a recipe for burn out. That needs a team, not a single person. Adults, not a minor child. That many special needs kids being taken care of by ONE MINOR CHILD needs CPS looking into neglect. Plus they expect the poor kid to run the household? Do they expect OP to drop out of school and do it 24/7?
Story 1: but they're not putting in extra effort to take care of these kids, they're making their son put in the extra effort to take care of them, they still have a very obvious favorite, and on top of neglecting their son they use him to take care of everyone else so they can spend more time with their favorite. Their expectation is that OP give up his entire life so they don't have to, or admit that they can actually take care of all of these kids. And I love how they can look their son dead in the eye and say Amy deserves to be young when they're parentifying their son since he was 11.
The parents do sound abusive in that regard. I have sympathy for those who can't take care of themselves, but the parents can't dump all that responsibility on a non-disabled kid because that child is THE PARENTS' RESPONSIBILITY to take care of, NOT their other child's.
If I was op I run far away to some people that actually care about me
I was in a similar scenario (but it was slightly reversed). I have autism, but my neurotypical younger siblings got babied while I did the chores. I was also yelled at for not doing the chores the "right" way (ie. the way neurotypicals do it, which sometimes overstims me and can induce panic attacks). Even though I am 26 and my siblings are 23 now, I am the only one who has a job and their own apartment and I'm the disabled one. (Edit addition: Yes, even severely autistic people can do simple chores if you're willing to adapt them slightly. I volunteer at a charity that teaches autistic adults these skills. The parents in the story are probably a combination of lazy, neglectful, and stubborn)
I was looking for this comment or I would’ve said it myself. Thank you for putting this out there
It is complete ignorance to say they are not putting in extra effort! Are the parents taking on more than they are capable of taking on? Obviously, it seems that way! But asking a family member to help when the parents are absolutely doing everything they can, and not being lazy themselves…no, It’s not an abuse. Again, tell me you’re a millennial without telling me you’re a millennial.
My son had multiple breath-holding spells as a baby, and those things are TERRIFYING, even if you do know what's happening. And by the way, no, they aren't ALWAYS harmless. The doctors told us to count the seconds since he last took a breath cuz if he goes too long, you literally have to start infant CPR. That poor babysitter absolutely did the right thing.
Makes me wonder how the mom reacted the first time it happened. Did she just go: "Oh, my child stopped breathing and is turning blue. Ah, it'll be fine"?
I sure hope that mom sees all the posts calling her a butt hole and praising Daisy for her swift actions in a situation she was not privy to, because I would rather have a babysitter who cares enough about my child to not let them die right in front of her, even though in this case it wouldn’t have happened. Smart babysitter, dumb mom.
Yeah I see Daisy’s situation a blessing in disguise because she can find work if she wants to continue sitting. If word goes out about the tantrum, no one would want to work with them
I have never heard of a baby holding its breath until they pass out described as “normal”.
Because it's not. It might not be super dangerous but still isn't normal.
I’ve never heard about it. Regardless the sitter should’ve been informed
Yeah I was like "wtf" when he was describing that. I have had to help with baby cousins and nieces and have never heard of that
According to the NHS website:
Breath-holding can be scary for parents, but it's usually harmless and your child should grow out of it by the age of 4 or 5. Breath-holding episodes: usually last for less than 1 minute (if the child faints, they'll usually regain consciousness within 1 or 2 minutes)
So yeah, the parents may be chill about it, but no one informed Daisy.
Edit to add. The site said "usually regain." so there's a possibility they continue to hold their breath? Should an ambulance be called then?
I've heard of that before, it happens yes, its not normal but its fairly common. I forget what it's called but yeah. Best thing to do in such situations is try to shock them into breathing again or wait till they pass put then they'll start breathing again but obviously if it happens too often it can cause brain damage
If they wanted to care for multiple children with special needs, then they need to do it. You don't get to make your eldest child do it. I'm on the spectrum myself and never expected my siblings to help care for me growing up.
So on top of a cousin on the spectrum being tossed in an unfamiliar environment with only an overworked and overwhelmed teen to guide him, there are two other children on the spectrum having their lives changed having another child brought into their lives abruptly. Sorry but the cousin needs a better environment because OP is already spent.
Absolutely agree! I'm a Spectrimite and my mother raised me to handle my own "extra needs". It may take me longer or entail more effort than neurotypicals, but I was taught how to figure it out and manage without bothering other people. OP needs to run. Now.
A good deed isn't always the right deed. It's funny how many times I've been told life isn't black and white, yet I see so many nuerotypicals not understand it.
@@sandwichqueen IMO it isn't a good deed if it overburdens an already overwhelmed teen child. This is awful. This is parents wanting to Rescue, but not having the decision making skills to do it right!
Ah, but this way they get credit for doing something nice, while also dumping the actual workload on someone else.
Story 4: He *IS* a terrible person. He cheated on Lily when she suffered cancer, and his mistress dumped him for being a cheater, nobody should date him.
And the fact that Chris, a 38yr old, ended up crying to his parents after being told off by Grace for being insufferable and his history is really pathetic
Anyone else thinking Chris is the golden child? It’s as obvious as water being wet
Chris definitely is a golden child!
Why does he need to be trying to find a relationship from among his sister-in-law's friends? He's a big boy, maybe he should leave his momma's side and get out into the big world to find someone.
@@annika5893yeah dude needs his sister in law's help to find someone to date and then goes running to mommy when he gets rejected. Why would ANYONE want anything to do with him?
@@annika5893especially considering how OP and most of her friends were friends with his ex. They should be the last group of women to approach
If Breathing OP isn't the one keeping tabs on the family finances, he should probably start. His wife's reaction suggests that there's something else going on there...
you might be on to something
I'm suspicious too
That's the thought i had.
Yeah. HE needs to sort his priorities, yet SHE'S more concerned with money than her kids' lives?
Something ain't right.
Glad I'm not the only one thinking that.
Someone so uptight with money is either a snob who isn't afraid to show how they spend their money, or, they secretly use that money for something they don't want their spouse to know (compulsive shopping, debts, drugs...)
as a dry ham sandwhich, we don't claim him.
Honestly I don’t think flour would even claim him
@@lorilancaster5917Water wouldn’t claim him
@@nationalinstituteofcheese3012 As water, I can say we definitely don't claim him. 😂💧
a hungry pack of lions would claim him for snacking purpose
dude Chris is a real piece of work. cheats on his wife with cancer, cheats on the mistress he cheated on, blames OP for not being able to get a girlfriend. one thing that I'm also not seeing many people mention is the fact that he just seems to feel entitled to OP's friend, and keeps pursuing her even when she's made it clear she doesn't like him. this guy seriously sucks
How is it cruel to call someone out on their cruel actions?
Pretty crazy
@@nationalinstituteofcheese3012 what?
Yes he’s a piece of crap
First time I ever lol listening to these stories. Chris got savaged
I want updates on these stories. Like is the guy divorcing his psycho wife for firing the babysitter? Does summer disappear on her boyfriend again and he finds her sitting on a couch surrounded by tall men in white shirts? I need answers
@@goldyd144 where’s the update? I couldn’t find on the original post as it still “new” being 10 days old and from I saw the comments OP didn’t mention it.
@@Krystal40553 Currently looking! I remember hearing the update on a channel called SecretVoices. Trying to find the video. Worried it might've been fake now, tbh. :-\ I'll hit you back in an hour to say so. 👍🏼
Damn
@@Krystal40553 Sadly, it was fake. 😮💨😭 Will delete my original comment. 👍🏼
@@goldyd144 I see that’s unfortunate but thank you for checking!
"Stop blowing up my phone!!" Dumbledore said calmly.
😂! On another note, if Will was really worried why didn’t he call the cops instead of harassing OP?
@@lorilancaster5917I think Will is lacking that thing called common sense
@@bibigamer502 oh~ yes, its a rare disease yet the individuals that lack it are surprisingly capable of surviving, furder researcher of this condition is required
@@lorilancaster5917 probably thought OP was covering for Summer cheating or something.
@@gruffen4 or was cheating with Summer and didn’t want to say
Story 2: The wife in that stories overreaction is ridiculous. I hope she's losing sleep for months now because of her actions. Daisy didn't deserve that
Exactly. What was Daisy supposed to do? Because I’m pretty sure the wife would have given her an earful if she DIDN’T call 911.
Daisy should be commended for calling the ambulance, she was in a stressful situation with a baby that she thought was choking (or any other serious condition) I’d be happy that the babysitter called the emergency.
story's*
Poor Daisy. Not only would she have been frightened and stressed by the baby stopping breathing, but then she gets yelled at by some tantrum throwing adult for taking action.
Yep
Story 3: I don’t get why Ops responsible for someone else, and it’s crazy how that guy called Ops phone about 50 times and still has the audacity to demand an apology when Op did nothing wrong lol. 😂
I thought the boyfriend was responsible at first by asking the friend were his girlfriend is but I changed my mind after hearing he blew up her phone repeatedly demanding the same question plus demanding a apology later.
Also the girlfriend sounds like a dog, she wanders off and returns when she feel like it and does things on. a wim? Ya I can see how people would be annoyed with her.
I get some red flags here from the boyfriend. Seems like he is controlling his girlfriends whereabouts?! Is he stalking her via the phone? She should try to stay as close to her friend as possible, to be there, if the boyfriend gets worse and her friend needs help.
@@plueshadow6455 true, there are some red flags.
At first i didn’t think that because the girlfriend had a habit of wondering off or doing random things without saying anything so at first I thought he was justified, like oh he’s worried about her. But the insane amount of calls plus demanding a apology from OP shot that idea out of my head.
Sounds to me like the boyfriend is jealous of OP and thinks Summer is going off to OP to cheat on him, and he was blowing up OP's phone because he wanted OP to admit that Summer was there with OP.
Oh, when he started demanding to know where she was, alarm bells started off for me. Unless there’s a legit emergency like someone’s in the hospital, there’s no excuse for back to back calls like this. And regardless of how distraught you are, 50 calls is way excessive. Red flags are frantically waving about this guy. If he’s not an abuser, he’s controlling and needs therapy ASAP.
Edit: I’ve been in an abusive marriage before, so I’m hypervigilant for warning signs, hence me having my guard up when he snapped at the friend demanding to know the girlfriend’s whereabouts like she has to account for all her time, so he feels better.
Story 2: The babysitter is the victim.
1000% facts.. if i was friends with the babysitter i would advice her to never return and work for the toxic trash family ever..
They need to tell her vital piece of information and then get mad at her for not doing that final piece of information. She did goodbye calling the people who would actually know what to do: the police/ambulance/etc.
100%
She may have overreacted simply by not knowing the context of this particular baby turning blue on occasion being okay, but I'd say when a baby's life is at stake an overreaction is entirely valid.
No shit sherlock
Ugh... I just read a story about parents who refused to pay for their daughter's tuition, but gladly funded their nephew's tuition... I hate parents who pick favorites.
I thought it was the son's tuition they didn't pay for
Story 1: I have no sympathy for people who neglect their other kids over one kid's illness or the oh-so classic golden child BS. Aimee needs to enjoy their childhood? What, so OP DOESN'T NEED to enjoy HIS then? Gimme a break! NTA, I hate this favoritism BS.
Exactly and what would be there plan in the future? Lock and chain OP? I don’t see them placing the responsibility on to Aimee especially since at this point I don’t think she’s lifted a finger
@@lorilancaster5917They expect OP to want to take care of his sister, especially if they guilt trip him
Aimee is NOT OP's child, Aimee is THEIR CHILD. If OP wants to leave when they turn 18, that's their right to do so and they shouldn't feel ashamed for doing it.
@@VicGeorge2K6and Aimee is at an age where she can help some. However OPs parents really should be dedicating their funds for maids and aides. Unfortunately they’re AHs
Yea that's really stupid
I'm surprised Chris isn't in the hospital given how completely Grace roasted him.
I'm also surprised Grace wasn't charged with attempted murder because that roast was a killer!
I guess that makes OP the AH for not having the burn unit on speed dial
@@lorilancaster5917He needs skin grafts...maybe mommy dearest can donate 😂
she ripped his ego in the most glorious fashion
@@lorilancaster5917 Oh, yes! Someone call the burn unit!
For just a little bit of extra perspective on story 2, just in case there is some entitled parents lurking in here and agreeing with the wife.
I have asthma, I have had asthma since i was 9 months old. My parents heard me gasping in my crib in the middle of the night, saw a blue baby and rushed me to the hospital. They had to make shift an incubator from the NICU because they didn't have a nebulizer mask small enough for my tiny baby head. I was in and out of the hospital a lot until my pediatrician sold my parents an at home nebulizer for way under cost.
Now, imagine if I had a baby sitter that knew some infants just hold their breath sometimes but my parents forgot to tell them "She actually has chronic asthma, this is where we keep her nebulizer and this is how to use it.". What do you think would happen if I had an asthma attack? That baby sitter would just go "oh silly baby doing silly baby things" and I would have died.
This baby could have been choking on something, could have been having an asthma attack or some other respiratory issue and could have died. Thats all the baby sitter was thinking due to a lack of necessary information, she did the right thing.
That poor babysitter!
She did *everything* right after being put in a terrible situation with insufficient information, and then she got punished for it.
She doesn't need to be fired. She needs a raise, and an apology.
Cheater Chris story: I think there was an update where OP found out the friend called her "cruel" was also a cheater, so that's why the friend took a fellow cheater's side. They are now no longer friends
So your baby just _randomly stops breathing…_ and no one thinks to tell the babysitter this?
“I feel I was denied… Critical… _Need-to-know._ *_Information.“_*
My gut tells me this is Burt Gummer from tremors 2 talking
Story 2: So I was wondering why Daisy called the ambulance, and when the reason came, I understand.
Everything forgot to let Daisy know about the breathing issue, the issue happens, and she calls 911. Everyone except Daisy gets a score for not mentioning the breathing issue
Because nobody told Daisy how to deal with the issue, what else was gonna happen, Daisy just panicking with no idea what to do as the baby suffocates?
My thoughts exactly. I don’t blame Daisy at all.
And I don't blame her for calling the ambulance for something like that considering no one told her. It is your responsibility to tell the babysitter everything when it comes to watching children in certain things like that for example. Same for what they can't eat and more.
Yeah what the hell else was Daisy supposed to do? I'd freaking panic too!
In addition, they have money for a babysitter but not for propper insurance? Is it that expensive in the US?
She’s also a kid too
"Chris has grown a lot in the past few years, and doesn't need to be know for the worst thing he's ever done" .... Yeah that's not how that works. You can repent and change all you want but it will never change what you did in the past. The audacity of them to assume OP should let his friend fall into basically a trap and not even warn them about their cousins (idr) history is baffling
He’s only grown because he’s more of an AH. Funny how Natasha preaches this but does not provide references as to how he’s grown.
Eh that’s not entirely how it works , if a person does something insanely horrible , but then becomes a hood person , their past doesn’t define them. Their entire life must be viewed as a whole . If you base your judgement of a person off their worst action , then you don’t actually know the person .
Sure people are welcome to judge how they want. But judging Abraham Lincoln for being a slave owner doesn’t negate him freeing the slaves .
@@izraelburgess937 Yeah, but there needs to be evidence of said growth. Lincoln emancipated slaves once he was able to, while Christ hasn't made up for betraying his partners and mistreating them. If anything it seems like Chris is just as awful, if not worse, because he harassed Grace until she snapped and humiliated him. Plus, based on the fact that they were secluded when she snapped, he managed to corner and isolate her from the safety net of the party. That and the fact that he couldn't take "no" for answer are two huge red flags and prove that he hasn't grown at all; or at least that he's not grown enough to absolve him of his past
@@izraelburgess937 Hit 700 home runs, you're a hall of famer. Hit 700 home runs and hump one goat, you're a goat humper.
@@izraelburgess937hitler made animal shelters, that doesn't make him less of the worst person in history. Not everything can balance out, and not trusting a cheater is nowhere nea unreasonable
Story 4. Nah man, Chris gets 5/5 for divorcing and cheating on his ex-wife who was battling cancer. "In sickness and in health", that's what you said mate and that's the vow you're meant to keep. Failed several times to be a husband and doesn't deserve the time of day. He can cry to his bank account and simp for some streamer which he'll probably do. Or on OF.
Imma be real I've had abusive parents, but some of these parents make mine look like a damn picnic....and that's a bad thing
Story 4: saw this somewhere else but gotta post it here: if the truth makes you look like a bad person, you’re a bad person
And crying to mommy and daddy especially as an adult doesn’t help your case
I'm not a proponent of divorce, but, yeah, re-think your priorities and dump the wife and take the kids. Anyone who would yell at a 16 year old over calling an ambulance in what they thought was an emergency isn't anyone who needs to be raising kids.
2nd Story: Oh my god… with the exception of Daisy, I’m going with an ESH. The wife caring more about the loss of money than the SAFETY OF HER CHILD was incredibly alarming. Not only that, but she, OP, and even his MOTHER didn’t tell Daisy about the baby’s condition?! Shouldn’t have that been the FIRST thing they told her when she started babysitting for them? I agree with Rslash, this is absolutely ridiculous, and Daisy did the right thing here.
Yea really
Story 2: You guys have multiple kids, one is a baby, and you torched the relationship with a good, responsible babysitter by withholding really important info and blowing up/ with holding pay when she was placed in a very scary situation. In my town, responsible teens ready to step in and babysit are a rare find. They will be less likely to sit for you when this story gets out on social media, which it will. Her friends won't work for you, but neither will the kids of her parents' friends. That is probably for the best.
Story 2:
Wife: HOW DARE YOU FOR NOT BEING ABLE TO READ MINDS TO KNOW WHAT TO DO?
That mother is a POS. They better apologize and pay twice what they owe Daisy.
And offer a good referral
If your baby is weeping blood you’ve got a bigger problem than that on your hands. They’re going to grow up to be a literalJames Bond villain.
I was wondering if this would come up in the comments. Let's hope they don't gamble with terrorist's money
@@J.R8765 I’d also deter them from joining the Scouts and learning how to do complex knots.
@@katashworth41 also deter them from getting to know hoe explosives work
Story 4: when you have to deal with fallout because your actions come to light, the problem is your actions, not the person who brought them to light.
Chris got verbally obliterated. That conversation sounded painful
he got shot by a bazooka of words, but can't say he didn't look for it ...
Story1: I hope op updates with how his parents demanding he move back in because their golden brat can’t/doesn’t want to deal with responsibilities , and go as far as to try and kidnap him , honestly they should make home economics a mandatory class
Story 4: doesn't sound like he changed all that much, because when she said no the first time he should have left that that instead he hounded her like a damn dog until she finally burned his ass. If half the friend group already knew then it kind of doesn't matter you told her because someone else was going to, and it's not your responsibility to make sure he has a chance of getting laid before she finds out he cheated on his wife while she had cancer, then on his mistress. Plus he got his parents to call you on his behalf demanding an apology, he is such a loser.
(Breathing) OP, your wife is nuts. Given this level of unreasonableness, I'm shocked that there haven't been issues before.
Fifth story: NTA. OP warned her, OP basically said "if you keep that day everyone will consider you a self-obsessed, unsensible douchebag and no one will go to your wedding" and she doubled down by saying the day is important for her, well it is as well for the rest of the family and not in the same way as her and now that she's suffering the consequences she blames and lashes out at the closest she can, in this case OP.
My husband & I have been married almost 30 years. We got married a year and a day after his mom passed away from cancer. He chose the date. When I asked him if was sure, he said, "I want this to be a happy time too. It doesn't always need to be sad."
The 25 yo is so self centered. My grandmother died on Thanksgiving. My mom understandably did not want to celebrate. I left her alone about it for 10 years until I said I was going to celebrate. My mom had a frosty relationship with her mother and I gave her 10 years to grieve. The daughter in this story expects her relatives to just get over their significant loss because she doesn't care.
@@kg5626 exactly.
I don't understand this fascination with commemorating a date where something bad happened to you or people you love. Why wouldn't you want to forget the bad, remember the good, and just move on?
I'm sorry, but that's not a healthy way to grieve. If it were the dead individual's birthday, I could see setting that day aside to remember that person, visit their grave and remember the good times. But to do it on the day of their death is fucking mental.
Nobody was really the butthole in that last story imo, but people need to sort out their way of grieving.
@@guywholikesgoodmusic heaven forbid a family member has a baby with that date as the expected delivery. What then? Baby is cancelled or ignored for the rest of his/her life?
Story 3: it's so they don't have to confront each other or take responsibility for the crap they pulled today because they can conveniently blame it on someone else. That or he just a generic douchebag that doesn't see why he's an ass forgetting mad at you because in his mind you were acting suspicious.
He knew exactly what Summer is like and this one single time he is insecure about it and takes it out on Summer’s friend as if they knew where she is and is hiding her
Happy Monday fellow Rslashians! Have a smooth, safe, and entertaining week
I think the fact that the paramedics actually took the baby to the hospital (since they paid for an ambulance ride, I have to assume they did), really shows how reasonable the call was. If trained medical professionals believe it's serious, i have no idea how anyone could expect a 16 year old to make the call that it's not. I realize that an ambulance ride is not small money and that this could be extremely frustrating (possibly cancelled vacation plans and such to pay for it), but it's definitely not the baby sitters fault
Story 2, I hope the babysitter sues for emotional distress.
As a minor she can’t. However her parents could sue on her behalf
When I was little my parents babysat our neighbor's toddler and she would do that same breath holding thing. I remember one night when my mom had to call the paramedics for her, there definitely wasn't any hesitation to call when the child was turning blue! The mother in this story is insane to think any babysitter isn't going to have that perfectly normal reaction.
My youngest stepdaughter still has a hard time every birthday because her favorite uncle passed away on her birthday. Bride can't expect people to just forget that they lost multiple loved ones on or shortly after that date.
I feel like in her delusional mind she expects her wedding to override the events that happened. Screw that loved ones are no longer here but wedding! Cake!
Story Four: "grown"? No
OP's friend told him "no" and that she was not interested multiple times but he still hit on her. He didn't grown an inch
Story 1: This family should have stopped after child#2. Not because of the history of Autism, but because it's so obvious they're lousy parents.
Story 2: ...did the wife seriously get angry at the babysitter for DOING THE RESPONSIBLE THING IN WHAT SEEMED LIKE A LIFE-DEATH SITUATION? 🤦♂
wtf is wrong with some parents ?? im really blessed to have normal ones
We are all happy that we have responsible and normal parents
Definitely makes us grateful to have somewhat normal parents! Haha!
Wow exactly that. I'm really lucky to have an amazing mom and not the scary ones from these types of stories
Maybe you didn’t mean it that way, but comments like these can be pretty backhanded/insensitive because to those of us with parental issues or actual abusive families, you’re basically saying “Wow, I can’t believe your parents are so awful. That’s so messed up. Good thing I have normal parents, unlike you. 🤭” .
It’s fine to keep the thoughts to yourself, there’s nothing wrong with sympathizing/empathizing with other in much less fortunate situations. But maybe avoid commenting about it online and/or in-person.
@@ellie8461 damn people on the internet really find anything to get offended by
To anyone who reads this, have a good day
You too!!🫶🏼
you too man thanks
You too sir
Thanks bro you too
Jesus loves you❤❤
Story 3: you are in high school op. High school never ends 🎶
Story 1 is one of the most obvious stories of parentification I have seen in a long time
If i were op I'd have called cps and told them everything.
@@Gabbz737NEW Definitely. Doesn't CPS need to do months of inspections and appointments before a fostering/adoption can even be processed.
@@ScorpiusZA.and they would have to interview OP which I feel he will give them the honest truth. I would also hope OP starts recording himself performing the daily routines for as long as possible. That way he could provide evidence in case the parents try to spin a different story.
Is anyone else getting vibes that the wife was looking for a reason to get rid of Daisy because she’s insecure or jealous? Like I know Daisy is a child so that shouldn’t be the case but the “reevaluate your priorities in the RELATIONSHIP” line gives serious red flags. Why bring up your marriage over an issue with the child babysitter?
Sounds like Chris's pocket lint is more valuable than he is.
"He wants you to apologize for saying he blew your phone up"
Then why did he do it? 🙄
Literally not something to apologize for in the first place, never mind the fact that it's objectively true.
Story 2: God, poor Daisy. She did everything right, and got yelled at for it. I know I’d freak out seeing a baby *PASS OUT from not breathing* and I’m an adult. She’s *16.* She was probably terrified a goddamn baby was going to die on her watch, and the wife was like… okay, let me make this worse. like Jesus Christ how doesn’t she realize not telling the TEEN BABYSITTER that your infant has an issue where he stops breathing! what the actual hell!!
If I was OP in story 2, I’d send the babysitter an extra payment with an apology. That had to be traumatic for her - first to have the baby stop breathing, and then the be screamed at like that by your boss.
Story 2: Imagine marrying someone, having kids with them, only to then find out they care more about money than about their own children.
Story 3: this guy is dating someone who leaves frequently and forgets to pay the phone bill… yet decides to blow up OP’s phone instead of anyone else who knows her. Then when she doesn’t know; he just blows up OP’s phone to the point where she would have to have him blocked cause it was interfering with work.
Im pretty sure if the roles were reversed and the boyfriend got a massive influx of missed calls from one person that he would have snapped way before the 51st call
OP was only an AH for not blocking him after he called her when she tried calling Summers parents.
Wedding date story: I'm three years removed from the death of my sister and I was a huge mess on the 2nd anniversary off and on all day that day and wouldn't have been in the right mind for a wedding.
Dad was 100% right and the daughter ignored it at her peril. She's not an ahole for chosing that date, but its like having a destination wedding: do it if you want, but you look like an idiot if you get mad that not everyone attends.
She's not an a****** for not choosing another date. I don't build my life around the grief of other people. I lost my sister to a violent crime. And we still don't know where the body is because her ex won't admit where it is. Even though he's confessed, he won't tell the police where her body is. My best friend who I was standing in her wedding already had her wedding booked on the date we found out my sister was dead A year in advance because if you want this location you got a book at least a year in advance to get it. You know what I did. I lived for the living and not for the dead. I went and it was hard but I did it. And I got to be there and support my friend. If you feel different that's fine, but I don't expect everyone in my life to edit their life because of my tragedy. And this tragedy is ongoing because we don't have a grave to go to. We don't have anything. We don't even know where her body is. But I don't expect everybody to edit their lives because I'm grieving and I'm going through something that's traumatic. I'd rather live for the living then dying with the dead.
It's kind of in the same vein that I don't think I have the right because I have some pretty severe PTSD and trauma surrounding the death of my sister and what I saw that night. That I have the right to behave poorly to the people in my life. I don't have the right to be cruel or say mean things. I'm not responsible for what happened to sister, family and me, but I am responsible for my actions to it. And I am responsible for my behavior.
@@LLandS18 Your friend had the date and venue before your sister's death. And you are but 1 of her friends. I'm sure she would've understood of you didn't go. And yes, you are right that you should have not asked to change the date for your benefit. She had a decision to make, and so do you.
Here however, the daughter chose the date with the tragedy in mind, and just because it was a 'romantic anniversary' stuff. She fixed that date knowing that what she was asking people to endure. And the people who had to choose whether to go or not, are her immediate family. So yes, fixating on that date even though she was warned beforehand, makes her the A-hole: because she didn't give a damn about her family's feelings, and then had the gall to be upset.
@@vesuvius1318 It wouldn't have mattered. Because like I said I live with the living I'm not dying with the dead. I would much rather be there for my friend then at home wallowing in my grief. The only thing staying home is going to accomplish is I'm going to be miserable alone and I'm going to let my friend down. I'm going to betray years of friendship. No. This foolishness of the anniversary is sacred and we have to hold it up and we have to mourn it every year. It's just leads to more trauma more PTSD more being stuck. So they can have their grief or they can support their family member. You can show up for an hour. You can show up for half hour. You can do it. You can be there for your family.
@@LLandS18and who are you to dictate how other people should grief? people deal with their stuff on their own time, not on what you or the daughter in this case thinks its best
She was informed they werent ready for that and surprise, they weren't!
she's not the a* for not choosing a different date, but she is one for expecting them to come and getting angry about it, so self centered and inconsiderate.
@@marquitomarquito10 I'm not dictating how anyone should grieve. But I'm saying why do you want to live with the dead when you can live with the living. You really need to get off your high horse sweetheart. Honestly, you're the one dictating how people should grief. You're the one telling me I'm wrong. I'm just saying you should be there to support the living. And not spend so much time with the dead. But let me guess nobody suffered as much as you nobody's lost as much as you. Typical.
3rd story
I think OP really should call Will and apologise. Call him 50 times to make sure he knows HOW VERY SORRY OP is... Preferrably during Will's work hours ;)
!!Summer's boyfriend sounds abusive!!
Very true and I think she needs a mental evaluation because she seems to have concerns that are being brushed off as “carefree”
He came across as pretty controlling
He's probably just annoyed having to deal with her childish antics all the time. I mean come on, as an adult are you really too stupid to remember to pay your phone bill? He's definitely wrong for calling fifty times but lets not act like he did it for absolutely no reason.
@HDTDNOVIV I was more concerned with the, "Girlfriend, make your friend apologize for me taking my frustration with you out on her or she's going to be cut off"
@@HDTDNOVIVIf he was annoyed by her antics, he wouldn't be her boyfriend, just some asshole that fucks the brain out of her...
If any is left.
Which, is most likely the reality...
Story 3: NTA. Op, told him that she doesn’t know where her friend is and that she will call her parents. He called her before she could, why didn’t he call her parents? The friend is also an AH for disappearing and dragging op into her BS.
Story 4: NTA. If BIL didn’t want to be seen as a bad person then he shouldn’t be a bad person. Why should op set her friends up with a cheater?
For the 3rd story question the insecure bf probably thought OP and the friend that went missing were in a hotel or something getting it on or that OP was covering up said friends affair (that’s just my guess)
@@bibigamer502 I’m guessing friend gotten used to op being responsible for her.
Story 1: I agree with everybody that OP needs an exit plan. One of the things he needs to do is get possession of all the documentation he needs (birth certificate, etc.) Also, if he has any savings, he must find a way to protect them from his parents' grasp. At the very least, they will deny him access to those funds to make it more difficult to move out.
Story 3 has me _very_ worried about Summer, to be bluntly honest...
I think it's evident that these "ego trips" that OP was describing aren't rare, based on Summer's immediately docile behavior. This, to me, is an alarming sign that he's regularly abusive to her.
Yes! This. Thats some dodgy stuff. Op needs to set boundaries but hopefully can help her in the future if something goes south
Summer is a bad friend. ‘Apologise to my boyfriend anyway’ - take a hike.
*First OP:* I have no words. OP is NTA.
*Second OP:* What hurtful things did OP say to his wife, specifically? That information can make the difference between NTA and ESH. At face value, OP is NTA, but he (and/or his wife) could've told the babysitter about the breath holding thing.
*Third OP:* And this is why you should pay your phone bill, unless you're on a family plan. OP is NTA.
*Fourth OP:* Grace's read to Chris hurt _my_ feelings, lol. OP is NTA.
*Fifth OP:* OP _did_ warn her daughter, but she wouldn't listen. It's another sad case of FAFO. OP is NTA.
* Should have
OP and his wife absolutely should have told Daisy about the breath holding spells. OP probably told his wife she was acting crazy (which she was). I'm going with NTA for OP because he at least got mad at the correct person and was understanding of Daisy calling 911.
I have a younger bother that had these same breathing episodes (common in his dad's family). I was 15 the first time it happened, and it lasted until he was three or four. Every single time, it was scary and unnerving. Every time. Daisy did the right thing, and she was probably terrified the entire time.
The second story.
This is why America is messed up, and Health care should be free. If that happened in the UK (and most of the rest of the world), wouldn't cost you a penny.
Seriously, I've heard so many of these stories where people in America don't do the "Right" thing, or do the right thing and get into trouble for it, because "It costs money.", when it really shouldn't!
As an American, I try to avoid international travel, lest I try to make it a one-way trip precisely for this reason.
I never comment on these, but Jesus Fucking Christ that is the most personal and carefully laid out roast I have EVER heard (“the truth” story)
Grace should offer her services as a professional scolder
Rslash, you said the age wrong in the first story. OP put 16, not 18, as their age.
Also for the last story i dont think the daughter is dumb just cruel. I say this because she knew about the date and its significance to the family but still went ahead with planning her wedding on that same date.
More like self-centered. She picked it because it held a good memory for her, but didn't care that it was a devastating one for everyone she expected to attend. Not deliberately cruel, just cared more about herself than what it would do to everyone else.
Baby stops breathing, turns blue and passes out, babysitter calls 911 and the mom is...Mad at her?
WTAF and how did no one tell the babysitter that your infant likes to cosplay as a dead baby!?!
Second story: NTA. Daisy indeed did what was right and she gets mand for it? OP's wife needs to have a psyquiatric evaluation for that overrreaction.
So, who else wants to hear about china after he's back?
Me I want to hear any it like there
Special trip to China episode! I wanna see pictures! 📸
"Summer is a free spirit." She's actually a selfish and inconsiderate person to just up and leave and not tell anyone where she's going. Unless she's insane. Either way, she's the problem.
Story 1: does this also mean that OP has to share his birthday with Aimee and his other siblings as well?? I wouldn't be surprised if it ends up that they don't celebrate at all because it would upset Aimee
Story 4: I actually spat out my coffee while listening to this😂😂😂
Op your BIL is SUCH A LOSER😂
Look i am all for people shooting their shot…but you need to read the room.
Given how harshly Op’s friend responded it’s pretty clear she TRIED to let him down gently, but he wasn’t getting the hint.
Naw NTA Op, why did MIL get involved😂 why was she yelling at Op? Because she hurt her precious sons little feelings?
Story 3: I don’t like the vibes Will is giving off…why the hell did he spend his time calling someone 51 times, when he could’ve spent that time calling Summer’s other friends, contacting her parents, or going to the location she gave him? Why is he so butthurt over being told he was blowing up her phone? I dunno man, this doesn’t feel like ordinary concern over where his girlfriend was, it feels like something bad
Last story:
I don't get people who black out dates because somebody died.
You're going to be missing those people regardless; you shouldn't let it spoil the time you have left with the people that are still here.
There is no time limit on grief, but you have to allow others to move on at their own pace.
What should have been a happy day for OP's daughter was effectively made into a 2nd funeral for the family members.
👏👏👏🎯🎯💯💯💯
Story 2: As someone who grew up with a yeller (just an aunt luckily), a divorce will save those kids from trauma.
The last story about the wedding date… The daughter getting married is NTA for picking that date. If life came to a standstill every single time to remember somebody that died, we would have 365 days of mourning a year.
Story3: sometimes it really is better to drop a 20-30 year friendship. All those "quirks" add up, even escalate over time, and they are not worth tolerating. Do you really want to stick around to see what stunt they pull next? Of course, you have the obligatory conversation to try and avoid that, but you have to establish and stand by your boundaries.
I'm 37, and had to do this recently. My decision has to do with refusing to watch someone slowly off themselves with booze while they have progressive pancreatitis, and another where I was just being used to facilitate that dickhead's penchant for cheating on his wife, who I tried to help but she just kept going back. The third time is when I gave up and blocked all parties.
story 5: she is not mean?! what?!
she is a complete bridezella, 3 people died on that date only 2 years ago and she wants people to forget about them and come to her
She definitely planned it on purpose in some sort of spite because a reasonable person would understand.
The death was 5 years ago.
She started her relationship on their death day 2 years after that. And wants to marry on the 5th anniversary of their death.
“We all have to make sacrifices”
“Yeah, except Aimee. I have to do everything so you and your golden child can have a life. Im just ‘the help’ that’s unpaid instead of the child you’re also supposed to love”
And what sacrifices has the parents made? I see them only working their long hours to avoid any actual responsibility
@@lorilancaster5917 even children with disabilities can do things to help, and they are like “nope she deserves to have a childhood, you don’t” to OP
@@TsukiKageToraand if there disabilities are bad off, they could get SSI which would provide caregiver assistance.
I have a disabled sister- she's completely dependant, hard to understand, can't move or eat, etc... In a weird way, growing up I always felt like we were 2 single kids, but I still love her deeply. I'm very fortunate that my parents never needed me to do too much to help her, and even when I needed to step up, it was okay. I love my girl! I feel awful for all these kids that don't get the same experience.
"it's not my fault the date I chose coincides with the date of their death!"
If she wanted that date so bad then she could get eloped and then have the party on a different day
She could’ve picked a different anniversary date for the wedding. For instance the anniversary of saying I love you. Just because this date has fond memories for her, her family is still haunted by what happened and no wedding with fix it.
@@audreym3908agree completely
I just recently ate a sandwich that was one of those ones you get at the deli where they're kind of soggy and I actually think I'd prefer a dry sandwich over a soggy one..
Best case scenario you can just put your own mayonnaise on the sandwich if it's dry but the soggy ones can't really be saved.
Story 1: I said it on Vincey's channel, and I'll say it here, too. OP, hold FIRM. They will try to push that deadline, and you will never leave if you let them.
Story 2 YTA for not telling daisy in the first damn place!
Nah I’d tell the friend it’s her fault her bf was hurling abuse and maybe if she quit up and pulling a Houdini none of this would happen. What if one day she disappeared forever, she’s either dead or she just up and made a new life somewhere else. She doesn’t sound like a great friend tbh so I’d just cut contact and block both of them.
Just had the thought what if she had a baby and was still doing this well from bfs reaction he probably be abusive while she’s nvr around.
I think OP should cut her losses with Summer. At this point she’s more of her carer than her friend.
Story 5 NTA. Going to a wedding on the death date of my husband/wife would be extremely difficult, I understand why they aren’t going. My aunt still can’t go to Tennessee cause her and my uncle would go there every year before he passed away in 2022
The second story is nuts. As a mom of 3 who can't even afford a sitter... If i did have one and they are scared for my child id rather safe than sorry any day. You do NOT want your sitter afraid to get help for your child.
Story one: NTA. Get out of there ASAP. You owe nothing to any of them.
Story 2: Tell me that you are from the US without telling me you are from the US.
Tell us you're an idiot without telling us.
1- NTA, the parents are the ones
who make sacrifices, not the children!
2- ESH except for the babysitter, as an ex babysitter I would call 911! I'm not taking responsibility for a brain-dead baby!
3- NTA, no friendship is worth that headache!
4- NTA, if Natasha thinks Chris has grow she can play match maker! OP did the right thing by worrying her female friends about Chris's character!
5- NTA, who picks the date of the day 3 of their family members died! You're just asking for bad luck!
Oh and on the baby sitter one, if this hadn't been a "breath holding incident" and the baby actually died, would the mom be grateful for all the money the babysitter saved them (not just the ambulance ride, but the next 17 years of child rearing expenses).
MY "apology" would have been..."I'm sorry you didn't understand the first 50 times that I didn't know where your gf was. Next time, when I tell you, let it go and call her parents or tell her to pay her phone bill so this NEVER happens again." 😊