The Dangers Of Being Dutiful
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- čas přidán 5. 09. 2024
- We associate being dutiful with being safe - that’s how it worked at school. But once we are in the big world, too much of a concern for duty can be our downfall.
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FURTHER READING
“We start off in life being very interested in pleasure and fun. In our earliest years, we do little but hunt out situations that will amuse us, pursuing our hedonistic goals with the help of puddles, crayons, balls, teddies, computers and bits and pieces we find in the kitchen drawers. As soon as anything gets frustrating or boring, we simply give up and go in search of new sources of enjoyment - and no one appears to mind very much.
Then, all of a sudden at the age of 5 or 6, we are introduced to a terrifying new reality: the Rule of Duty. This states that there are some things, indeed many things, that we must do not because we like or see the point of them, but because other people, very intimidating authoritative people who may be almost three times our size, expect us to do them - in order, so the big people sternly explain, that we’ll be able to earn money, buy a house and go on holiday about 30 years from now. It sounds pretty important - sort of….”
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Whenever I try to think of whatever I personally would want to do I feel like I might just want to do nothing at all
yeah I can agree with that as well.
I feel you. Tho, in thoses moment, I try to guess what my younger self would've wanted to do.
Burned out?
That was the same answer I responded after watching this video. It feels like, I don't know what exactly I wanted to do so I hold on the duties I have to finish.
@Janice Brown try meditation
you're actually doing nothing
"Pleasure isn't the opposite of work"... a whole education system that values grades based on dutiful exams seems to disagree with you.
I'm afraid I have to fully agree!
well said
WOW!
That's why there is an incredible waste of human talent and so many unhappy people around. Ken Robinson has an excellent TED Talk called " Do schools kill creativity". I thought you may like that. Best wishes.
If you truly believe that, you're sorely mistaken.
Man, I wish someone was there to tell me this ten years back. I guess the second best time to start is NOW!!!
There is only the NOW when else are you going to start? Tomorrow? lol
^^^
Good point...
It is always worth it. Please do not believe the people who say that you are "too" old or "too" unqualified or anything similar. Having to earn your life is NOT the opposite of doing what you love. Even in a dull job which garantees your house and food life is much better, if you ALSO do something you enjoy. And - who knows - you might even be able to change your career.
Absolutely, there will only be regret if you don't even try. Try now or regret forever. And don't feel that you are alone, even I have started doing something which I earlier wanted to. It is hard at first, but time to time there are rewards and fruits to be cherished. If it is hard in the beginning it will be worth it in the end no matter what the result.
I am kind of divided about this issue.
Dutifullness is extremely useful. The ability to endure through uncomfortable efforts in order to reach goals is what made (and makes) our species survive.
Nonetheless, it is a terrible misguided thought to believe dutifullness is a moral compass, and to elevate that idea to a way of life. One must try to be authentic, to be true to oneself, and then they can bring all their potential and be happy with what they do.
I graduated with a BA in Math(with a minor in Computer Science) a year ago and didn't know what I wanted to do. I used to think that entering the corporate/programming world was the only way to live. Getting amazing pay was the #1priority in my head. I was buying into society's version of success. After tutoring part time for awhile I realized that I wanted to be a math teacher. I realized that all I want is to live a modest life. Seeing how things never impressed me I never fully understood people's obsession with fame, nice cars, mansions, etc. Whenever I got something like a new gaming system I would be excited about it for only a few weeks. As long as I eat healthy, have a roof over my head, have clothing, and a few great friends, I'm happy. I think people should think more about living modestly every now and then. Being very dutiful to get more things only seems to make things worse.
I will fulfil my dream of being the greatest doodler of colourful primary shapes.
whatever makes you happy
and don't you dare let anyone talk you out of your dreams #yougogirl
funnily enough, those people in the adult world are called abstract artists - you go for it
I can dig some Kandinsky.
Like hyperbole and a half?
I hope this list helps someone:
1. The founder of this channel Alain de Botton gave the best career advice I' ve ever heard. It was on an event called " Fulfillment at work" , which you can find on youtube. He said:
"Dare to dream. Set yourself a vision of how you would like the world to be and work backwards from it. Have the courage not just to dream a little bit, but to dream and then rationalise and analyse your dream. It is a mixture of imagination and reason."
Let's be honest. None of us would ever dream of a career which is NOT fun! We all want to live an enjoyable and fulfilled life. The great thing about this advice is that it doesn't simply say:
" Follow your dreams".
But it encourages you to think deeply about it. " Analyse your dreams" may sound less glamorous. But indeed it is much more wise and encouraging!
I recommend all friends who doesn't know which career to choose, to read Alain's wonderful book:
" The Pleasures and Sorrows of Work" too.
2. My most beloved movie of all times is " A Bronx Tale" , by Robert de Niro. It is much more than a gangster movie! You will learn a lot about life from it! The best line from that movie is:
"The saddest thing in life is wasted talent".
3. Talking about talent, if you want to be sure about what it feels like being in your element, you can read the wonderful book " Flow , The Psychology of Happiness" by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi.
4. Ken Robinson's TED Talk " Do schools kill creativity" and his wonderful speech at The School of life, called " On passion", are very helpful too. They very much resonate with the idea presented in this beautiful lesson.
5. Malcolm Gladwell wrote the book " Outliers" about success, which became a New York Times bestseller. On an interview Larry King asked him what all these people who were extremely successful had in common. Gladwell said:
"All successful people love what they do."
6. In his book " Creatures of a day" , psychiatrist Irvin Yalom, recommends to a patient who is not happy with his profession, the book " Meditations" by Marcus Aurelius. He says Aurelius, being the Roman Emperor, was not happy with his job either! Because he wanted to become a philosopher indeed... I think because it was his real passion, we honour Marcus Aurelius today more as a philosopher than as a ruler!
7. If you want to try the very helpful " Death bed perspective" recommended in this lesson, there is one book and one movie that can get you right there:
The Death of Ivan Ilyich by Tolstoi
Ikiru by Akira Kurosawa
8. If you have a job you hate, Maria Popova's story can be encouraging for you. She is the founder of the wonderful website Brainpickings. She used to have a steady , well paid job , but this is what she says about her decision to leave it:
“Do I want to bury myself in a corporate job that I’m going to spent 80% of my waking hours at, be miserable, and hope that the money it gives me will make the other 20% of my life better, even though I’m angry and tired and burned out? Or, do I want to do something that makes me happy to wake up to and happy to go to sleep having done and let the financial part figure itself out?"
She is reading and writing all day and bringing wisdom into people's lives through her website and turns out that it became a huge success and she makes her living out of it!
9. Psychiatrist Irvin Yalom says in one of his books that even though he is 80 years old he can't imagine to be retired. He says he would even " pay" in order to keep working! Isn't that wonderful??
I also remembered an interview I have read with a famous Italian shoemaker. ( I forgot his name unfortunately). After making shoes for about 50 years with so much love and passion, for all kinds of people, he decided to retire. So the interviewer asked him :
" Well, now that you will have a lot of time, what do you want to do with it?". He thought for a while and said: " Oh, himmmm, I guess I will make shoes." :-)
We should aspire to be like these people!
Hidden gem comment! Thanks!
@@marvinalbert Hello there Marvin! What a beautiful thing to say! Thanks a lot for your time. Best wishes :- )
@@bolivar1789 Hey Lua :) I especially liked the first point "Set yourself a vision of how you would like the world to be and work backwards from it.". Thanks for sharing and best wishes to you too :)
@@marvinalbert Oh absolutely! I love that one too! Alain de Botton is the philosopher from whom I have learnt the most in this world. Have a nice evening!
gem ❣️
Really its a matter of how can you align the serving of others with something you enjoy doing. Nothing more
How about career-growth as well?
That's a hollow concept born out of greed or the fear of lack. If you are perfectly content doing what you love, there is nothing more.
Potenti4lz: If growth (of the career growth sort or otherwise) is what you really find desirable, then seems to me key is to find a job where that's a thing.
Eco Mouse: it isn't necessarily a hollow concept born out of greed or fear of lack. Some people find contentment in present position without a need to drive upwards eternally to be an appealing thing, for others that's a terribly unpleasant state of stasis and feels like sort of cage. Movement IS what they love.
Key is for a person to find out which they are: do they love their job to be dynamic? Competitive? For there to be potential for them to move upwards, grow, and change within its strata? Maybe they even like the potential danger of being able to fall downwards and doing things to avoid that outcome. Or is that a stressful, miserable, distracting thing which gets in the way of them getting to really enjoy what they are already doing?
The thing is it's hard to find that balance between earning good money and finding your passion, not saying it's impossible though.
Why not just earn okay money.
By okay I mean you can pay the bills. Good money implies high pay not just average.
Agreed
I honestly just want to live on a beach somewhere.
My passion is sculpture, but in order to become good enough to get paid for it, the passion became a duty. I now believe you can only loose this game.
None of this changes the fact that as long as we need that sweet cash money, we will always be forced to do things we don't like. Even in jobs we do like. And if we're not even lucky enough to get a job we like, we still gotta do it. A dont get me started on poor people, they have it even worse.
Some job's must be done, no one want's to be the garbage man, but someone must be them. We have to balance duty to society and duty to ourselves, that is what this is talking about, not that everyone should become artist's and entertainer's.
Thanks i almost get lost.
I agree with that. It seems like a delusive pat on the back people give to themselves
Find a faster way of doing the things you dislike or see if you can perceive it from a different standpoint, is there a new skill you can develop or improve by undertaking said task/s?
absolutely
The message of "do what you love and you'll never work a day in your life" Is a nice one, but it's the sort of thing only wealthy people say. Most of us have to get jobs to pay bills and eat. We don't have the option to take a job, or a career that may not pay, or won't pay well if it does pay at all. We can't take a year off to get on our feet, or in go afford school to learn how to do what we love, because we can't afford it. It is a nice thought, though.
True...but I think where there is will there's a way ;)
And also even when you do what you love, when it’s a job it can still turn into stress and a source of unhappiness sometimes. I think what we need is balance, where we have a job and also have a hobby that makes us happy and isn’t too expensive
I think the issue in the video was not that people only take jobs to make money to live off of, the issue is that people are usually trained to live for work. Pleasures are unimportant, and the work they dedicate their lives to needs to pay well and garner respect. Instead of choosing a career that will just pay the bills but allow them to do something they love, they set aside their interests to do something they don't like that will make them more money. The issue is choosing money over fulfillment, where there can be a choice. And where people work jobs they need to to get by, just the same they really aren't fulfilled. But that's not their own choosing in quite the same way and not what the message was referring to.
@@dylanbuchman8128 I agree with you on doing something you love/like to make enough money to survive instead of doing something you don't like just to make more money.
@@return2innocence221 yea that cliche phrase doesn't address the issue they expressed. It's way more nuanced and complicated than just simply emphasizing effort as key.
Truth is that most of the famous philosophers, writers, poets, painters and musicians we recognise today belonged to the leisure class. People who grew up in affluent families which gave them the time and money to pursue their hobbies and become masters. Most of us aren't so lucky, we have to play the capitalist game of earning a living.
Abdi Ismail
I'll take the Capitalist game over Communism. Of course it's a terrible system. But it's so much better than the others.
or maybe this is how we talk ourselves into giving up on our talents...
I agree with you completely. If there is something that we really want to do, but that nobody else really wants to pay for, then we will have a very hard time surviving in this world. So we need to be realistic about what we can do that will earn us money but at the same time will not be overly boring or horrible for us to endure. The comments are above who says that you are just making excuses to give up on your hopes and dreams is naïve. The reality is that in order to survive, many of us have to do things for a living that we really do not like.
Criminal Freedom Of course there's some truth to what you wrote. But there's truth to what I wrote also. If someone won't be able to support himself or his family by following his passion, he will need to stick to his current vocation if he places basic physical survival ahead of psychological passion. That said, there ARE many situations where a person can shift careers with some focus, hard work, and skill. All I'm saying is that people need to realize that there are situations that are miserable but getting out of those situations will likely lead to even greater misery. Life IS hard. Just look at the animal world: they often literally eat each other. The goal is to survive and then die after you live as long as you can.
not entirely true ive read a lot about some famous people coming from nothing into very talented respected people who got there on their own with support of few friends
What do you do when your passion Becomes a duty?
you achieve nirvana duh
nice question... what happend when passion become dull in the end... then what, find a new passion?
People always told me "do what you love for a living and you won't have to work a day."
I tried doing that but the world or industry in my line of work made me hate it. Now i have nothing much to love.
What's worse is that I am definitely not happy. It's like all my life I've told myself that I need to find happiness. Well what if the responsibility of finding happiness is not something I am willing to take.
Wouldn't it be easier if I sell my soul to something I love and work with no rewards in mind?
Why haven't I done that though? Why am I not passionate about anything the way I used to be when I was younger?
Should I even rely on my mind to tell me what makes me happy? Because maybe I have everything that I deserve but I'm not happy because my stupid brain doesn't produce enough dopamine... i'm just fucking depressed.
that's when you realise in reality, just because it is our lifelong dream job, that doesn't mean we go to work everyday with heart full of joy and sunshine. It is just our societal duty. And there is nothing dangerous about it if we are acceptance
It loses some of its magic. But the same happens with everything in life. When you move with your partner, when you get the desired job, when you go to college, when you elect a president (you voted for) etc. etc.
But that's still much better than working with something you don't like, keep living alone, not getting any degree (or getting a boring one), not getting the president you wanted etc. etc.
We should always keep in mind that we hold idealizations and we can't take them too seriously. There will always be unexpected drawbacks. But we have to overcome them.
I hope I have answered your question...
Awww the graphics in this one are darling!!! I love the little heart. She's so cute
What if there's no economic reward in your passion? Unless one is willing to take the risk of becoming homeless of course, the current system is not designed to accommodate activities that have no economic demand.
For example, I love gardening but I can't possibly compete with industrial farming and if I had to survive on it I'd have to think about the business side, which would take away all the fun. Theories are fun but reality isn't as simple as a 5 min video.
If money is more important to you than doing what you enjoy then take the most profitable job
There are plenty of people who plant gardens for others, estates, museums, public parks, etc. If it's truly a passion, you can find a career that allows you to do it. If you don’t want to take the time to research, and risk to pursue, it's disingenuous to consider it your passion and calling, it's really just a fun hobby
fear is what keep the cat behind the cage. life is about living and makinv mistakes and learning from them. and once you hit bottom the only way out is up
Write a book about gardening, create a video series about gardening, publish a travel journal about gardens you've visited in different regions, vlog/blog about gardening, give seminars and talks about gardening. Those are just the immediate things that come to mind and don't involve the obvious of selling food. When we are passionate about something we can bring our creativity with us.
I'm afraid those tips are not original. I do vlog about gardening. In fact I just posted a video of a botanical garden tour. To write a book you must be an expert and to give seminars you must be an expert in demand. I'm not saying it's impossible to reach that level but you'd need many years of development funded by some other kind of work before you're able to reach expert level. Out of curiosity, how many people you know that earn a living from doing the things you mentioned above. I don't know any, and not just in gardening. I know several talented artists that simply cannot do what they love because there's not in economic demand. As for selling food, you'd have to be doing farming on a fairly large scale with a business mentality, which takes the fun out of it as I mentioned in my original comment.
Oh by the way guys, this is totally a First World Problem.
Most people in developing countries don't have much choice in what they can pursue, because some occupations are valued, while some others are so regarded as garbage that they would earn people an imaginably low quality of living. They simply can't afford the luxury of having a sense of individuality.
This is no longer a First World Problem, thanks to spiraling inequality and the domination of predatory capitalism in our lives.
Consider this: if it were so easy to overcome the traps of duty and to pursue one's dreams, then we'd see less people stuck in precarious work as they abandon them for more fulfilling, and, in theory, more valued work.
Except that isn't true. People, and yes, this includes people in first world countries - the US and the UK, especially, cannot leave their work, especially if leaving it means they fall into homelessness and endanger their lives and their dependents.
We have repeatedly demonstrated a callous disregard of people's continued existence, especially of the lives of minorities or the disabled of the poor. As in, we'll cheer their deaths, and sneer at them for being undeserving of life.
Thing is, it's not that it's everyone's... heh... duty to embrace their passions. If you can, go ahead! more power to you. Recognize, however, that there are valid reasons for people to not embrace those desires, including the fact that those fears are _not_ illusory, they are _real_, and pressing. That the real duty of everyone is to ensure that _more_ people have that freedom we take for granted, because of two reasons: we are enriched when that happens, and because without it, our so-called higher values become hollow, self-serving lies.
But what do I know? I'm just some loser on the Internet.
I struggle with not being motivated by money. I only seek money because it's the life blood of our society. However, what has always motivated me strongly is when people listen to my input. I am creative and imaginative. I like coming up with solutions for problems, but I also simply like the fact that I feel like I matter.
Spot On!!!
Hayat Inzicht Thank you. I wish more employers understood, employees want to feel like they contributed to a company. Makes me feel nice. But I work in a creative job as a haunted house actor, so simply listening to some of my creative input matters. There's one thing telling me you appreciate my efforts and another thing listening to my input.
Get to work slave. You need to slave away so corporate elite can live like kings. Seriously. Most employers don't give a shit about us workers.
Ted the man And that's why America has the highest rate of de[ressopm. That's why American workers get sick. And are so stressed. If they want the peasants to work, at least make the peasants feel like their life doesn't suck. It's an illusion of meaning at least. But its something other than put us into a corporate graveyard.
You deserve 1,000 likes. :)
Well, no need to tel Ned Stark about the dangers of duty.
He did not have his head in the right place
Oh my god... these 2 comments killed me. HAHAHA!
There's so much PUUUNNNSSSSS my head will explode
Eh, Ned Stark was lucky. He got a nice beheading, quick painless death! How good is that, compared to life in the awful world of Westeros?
Be realistic about your passion.
Planning helps.
Having extremely high expectations never helps.
It only saddens you further after failure.
Id love to see a video about how to handle regrets and anxiety, basically just wishing for a time machine and living in the past would be a very interesting topic! love your videos! They help me so much in my life.
I’d imagine the video would note that regret is nothing but a time thief that projects the mistakes of the past into the present where they don’t belong. I also imagine such a video would gently advise that there is no better cure for regrets than one taking pride in making the right decisions in the present, and sticking to them even if they turn out to have been the wrong decisions, because we did the best we could with the information we had at the time.
@@Liusila Thank you, made me feel better 🤗
This comment section gives me anxiety.
As someone that's recently decided they wanted to be an illustrator/designer and is constantly wondering if that was the right choice, I really needed this. I know there will be nothing easy about the path I am taking and I am aware that I'm far from the best at what I do at this point in time. Regardless, I will work every bone in my body to make this work because I know at the end of the day, If I can actually, truly make it, I'll be far happier doing this than I would have been with any other "safer" job.
Besides, if I never try, I'll never know.
All the best😊
While this message is good, simple truth is that it's not a guarantee that you can make a livelihood just by following your passion. You have to pay bills, rent, food, miscellaneous supplies etc., how are you going to keep paying for those if your income from your passion is insignificant?
of course is not guarantee, but only if you're not passionate enough
Passion only takes you so far
Not if you live in Finland with a basic income for everyone and with which this video explains why they decided follow this path. Pretty sure they have a much higher GDP than most countries and have the best worldwide education too.
it can work if you are single the second you make a family and get one child you are screwed.
+Mar Goldingay
As a Finnish person, even with basic income, living is still hard because everything in here is really expensive.
I realize that your videos are equally effective to all types of ages, but this one for me raised more questions that it answered.
People always told me "do what you love for a living and you won't have to work a day."
I tried doing that but the world or industry in my line of work made me hate it. Now i have nothing much to love.
What's worse is that I am definitely not happy. It's like all my life I've told myself that I need to find happiness. Well what if the responsibility of finding happiness is not something I am willing to take.
Wouldn't it be easier if I sell my soul to something I love and work with no rewards in mind?
Why haven't I done that though? Why am I not passionate about anything the way I used to be when I was younger?
Should I even rely on my mind to tell me what makes me happy? Because maybe I have everything that I deserve but I'm not happy because my stupid brain doesn't produce enough dopamine... i'm just fucking depressed.
Honestly it could be a number of things.
Clinical depression which is different from regular depression due to it being from some chemical imbalance in the brain. The symptoms involve lack of interest, a "void", more fatigue and less energy, and the flat effect, where essentially you don't feel much emotion or express less.
Or maybe it's the fact, that in this world, the system we got is fucked up. By system, I mean the educational, economic, etc. all the institutions we put in place. I mean think about it.....we tear down trees which produce oxygen to make a piece of paper responsible for distribution. If you don't have this piece of paper, then you will not get medicine, food, etc. It's really fucked up.
It could be either. Here's something that might help you. If you can get help for your clinical depression, you might be fine. Maybe it's the second option, or maybe it's both. Or maybe neither. But if it involves the second option, then I say remember that human society isn't the "real world" The economic system isn't the "real world" The universe is all there is, we are observers and part of it at the same time. The universe is neither benevolent, malevolent, or logical. It doesn't owe you or care about you. Likewise, you don't owe it anything. It might seem depressing if you are looking for meaning in this world, but it's liberating in a sense that you can create your own meaning.
These are 2 options I see, but there could be others.
are you a designer by any chance?
Marah Rajjal lmao yes, actually. artist/animator.
Lady Irony same here, design and animation... It's difficult to be freaking creative every single day and produce the highest quality when people are nagging all day and wanting things to be done in a few hours... it doesn't work this way... and i hate that i'm just producing quantity while the quality isn't up to my standards :(
I’m also an artist. I used to enjoy it but started disliking it when I made it a profession >_<
One advice that I saw on a tv show: “Keep the 1st thing you love as your hobby, and take the 2nd thing you love as your profession."
Its all about finding a balance between work and pleasure, because sadly, its true that in the "adult world" we can't survive without jobs (and it can be extremely difficult finding a job you're passionate about!)
I am a law student.
I can say with conviction that I am not "in love" with the law; rather, it is the career path I am the least uncertain of. Here, suffering, overwork, depression and breakdowns are as common as breakfast.
Whenever I ask for career advice, I am told that I should pursue what I love to do. However, I find that I do not love anything enough to make a career out of (law included). The bigger question I have though, is whether love over a career can be created, or at the least, fabricated. That way, I can at least suffer a little less in memorizing the next case law I have to recite.
Perhaps you could consider the positive impact you are making -- or have the potential to make -- with your work. How will your work affect those around you? What legacy will it leave, as small as it may be?
All that said, you should really consider exploring other activities. I had a acquaintance who was working toward a STEM degree, but switched to music composition. He took a music composition class on the side to fulfill a general education requirement, and ended up loving it. If he hadn't taken that class, he'd probably have the same attitude toward his career path as you.
+TheLazyKey If ur good, u make a difference in the lives who u help on the other end: ur client.
My mom recently told me that she didn't want to see me as a teacher, and that I should be an engineer or a lawyer instead. I know it's too early to decide what I want for life, but I really feel this immense passion for teaching and helping children... My grandmother expressed the same concerns as well, saying that the pay isn't good, and that money is important.
They said they wouldn't stop me, but it stuck in my mind. It made me fall into a pit of depression for the past few weeks... this video really helped me. Money matters, but my happiness and passion matters too. Thank you so much for reassuring me, and many people, that it's okay to be a bit selfish and pick the life we want. It is our life after all.
life thus far hasn't been worth the struggle; i think about cutting my lossses all the time, but i'm curious about the future, so i stick around. that's it.
This is exactly how I'm feeling. You're not alone
It will become worth it at some point, and I think thats exactly what ur feeling right now. But trust me something will come by that is worth living for.
Not for me, I'm too old. It's way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way way past the time. I have struggled for most of my life and since January 2013.
Been there. I don't know you but I really hope it gets better.
I am always amazed about the black and white thinking that surrounds these topics. It's like: you should do something you like or you will not be happy and/or function not fully to your capacities. Like the work you do is the only thing that matters... Often the enviroment in which you work is more important then the work itself. For instance nice collegues or internal company values.
You can learn to look at things as something interesting and new and that way even see something fun in things you did not think were fun. ('making' intrinsic motivation) This is a way more constructive thing to do, because you will always encounter things you don't like. Even in your 'dream job'.
Furthermore I think it's not good to always want more and more in material ways, but it's not a good idea either to only want to have more and more fun and a better and better job. That won't make you happy in the end either. The whole 'wanting more' is the big reason people are often not happy with what they have... You can have a fun job and want a more fun job. Then you get the more fun job, but no you want the even more fun job! And there the cycle of not being satisfied is there again.
And don't even get me started on the fact people often think they want something and then they have it and don't really like it. Or people have what they like and after a while it get's boring anyway >.
Agreed
Wow, I find this as a more "realistic" approach, something that could've been added to video. Thanks :)
This video does not insinuate that one should find a "better" job for material gain, in fact it asks you to consider to do something that stokes your passion - even if there is a large risk of financial instability.
This video indeed does not.
It does fall into the trap of thinking the same way towards happiness. Thinking that following something you like will make your life better. Often we adapt to the new situation and it didn't get much better at all. And we want something 'better' again.
Ofcourse, if you do something you strongly dislike. Then I agree with this video. Doing something you 'hate' is not good for your mental state and energy and it is better to avoid if possible. But thinking that you need to follow a passion is not a solution either.
Also it is a bit decadent tbh. Do you really think all those people with normal jobs could follow their passion? That's almost never possible. Only people who have been lucky and people who came from a very good and 'golden' position can do that. The person who empties trashcans probably can't. The person that serves you your coffee probably can't. Reality is we need to work to live, wether we like it or not. Trying to find something you like in your average, not so superb job is for the majority of people, often way more constructive.
When you do that you maybe even find a new 'passion' by accident! That's often how it goes with older people who do something they love. They grew to love what they did, instead of loved something and then did that.
*This Brought me to tears*
Society expects me to be DUTIFUL to itself when I should rather be DUTIFUL to myself.
I shouldn't sit in a cubical & delve into a career I would not enjoy simply because it ensnares financial stability!
I want to live my life out of the constraints society expects to put me in. I will not allow society to box me up and tie the box in a neat little bow, only to fit within its standard and dull spectrum.
THANK YOU @/SchoolOfLife!! It was a much needed reminder.
you need to be able to balance both duty to society and duty to yourself, they are not saying fuck society, but that a good person who does a good job in society does not forget their duty to themselves, for without it, one will suffer.
Agreed. stupidly missed the underlying message there, thanks for pointing it out.
What if the stuff that brings you pleasure and is the most fun for you has no use to anyone? Being an artist is great because you get to make things and improve the world around you and make other people happy, but laying around and consuming media because it's fun doesn't exactly put bread on the table :(
But reviewing media does.
Find something you enjoy that will get you paid then! I truly believe that if you look hard enough you'll find something
Lori P
do reviews
you just gotta be creative on what your doing, even if it's just laying on the couch and watching tv
This was truly helpful as I have been teetering on the idea to make a career change lately. I have a PhD in Biomedical Sciences and have a 'successful" career as a Health Scientist, but have realized that I am unfulfilled and my heart is not in it anymore. Thank you School of Life for prompting me to further explore these thoughts of career change based on my heart's passions.
Good luck out there!
Thank you Clarke!
You're unfulfilled in being a health scientist? God help all the retail workers out there...
+Stalin Agreed. ☺️
follow your heart
but take your brain with you... ;)
Could you please do a video about introversion? I love your channel! :)
Excellent idea😃
great idea. Would love to watch that
Hey dude, you changed my life
I'll do it right now. Introverts need to face their fear or live a life of solitude and poverty. The end.
Eatin Macaroni introversion has nothing to do with fear of socialising or a desire for long periods of solitude.
As someone who “followed her passion” and became and illustrator because of my love of art making I can say doing art as work can so easily suck the passion out of it. It loses the freedom and creativity when done for other people to a deadline. I’ve found a middle ground teaching art and working in a school environment. Money comes in regularly (unlike free lance illustrating) but I’m still involved with my passion and it gives me “head space” to create art I want to create and enjoy the process of doing so without the pressure of making money from it. There’s a middle ground. And definitely something to be said for a job that isn’t so mentally taxing that you can come home and pursue what really interests you. I have a lot of artist friends who go down that road. :)
As Mulan once said, you've got duties to your heart
It's called personal responsibility.
You can be a spoiled brat that feels entitled to everything, or a humble responsible person that is thankful and proud of their hard work wether it was extremely successful or not (that's called character) and that's not a hobby or something your born with... It is furnished in the hardships of life.
That little heart character is TOO cute. Now I want a little smiling helper friend of my own.
I'm currently 12 and I'm glad I saw this I want to show this to my mom who hates her job I love art but for months I put it aside I'm glad I have the time to save myself from this.Not doing what you love is a worse death than anything ever imaginable
Correct but we need the safety of a basic income in order to truly search for our own authentic way in enhancing society. Without a citizen basic income, everything in this video is only directed to the financially secured already.
People keep acting like money is like air or water but I'm not seeing it
Thank you. I agree!
Everyday my parents tell me why be in Culinary Arts. Be a pharmacist. Do this. Do that. Well I just don't know what to do anymore. Being a chef is what brings me joy not generating medicine and giving out pills. Seeing the smile on people's faces after I present my dish and they taste it is what gives me joy. I come from an Asian household so everyone expects Lawyers and Doctors. They pressure me and I don't want to disappoint them but I don't to obey all the rules either. Soon I have to make a decision about what college to go to and what major I will choose. Senior year isn't as easy as I thought it would be. Seems like stress will be my best friend this year.
"Follow Your Bliss" Joseph Campbell
I understand because I am the same as you, but you know what, do it anyway because when you're older, everything will be worthwhile. plus chefs earn great too.
My apologies for the ramblings and assumptions of an old man.
Do you want to be a chef or a Celebrity Chef? If your passion is the preparing and serving of food for it's own sake then for God's sake stay on the path of a chef. An honest question for yourself: How's your head for business? If you don't know then that's an area to learn or find someone who does and team up. I've lived in cities, in the suburbs and now out in the country. More chefs fail to start or restaurants die, because they can't market their place or keep it solvent. Making good food isn't enough. You have to find a way to put it in front of peoples' noses. Word of mouth will do the rest. It's sounds like a contradiction: Should I like the food or the business parts? You may already know the answer to that question. Anyone who knows food can tell when care and passion has been placed in it.
If you want to be a Celebrity Chef? I don't know you, but the high stakes game of the celebrity restaurateur is not for the timid. You need the personality, drive and business head to make it happen. Being personable, forceful, and prideful enough to ignore others and keep reaching, not your dream, but your practical vision takes a heavy toll. Very few make it and it's a savage business. Yet, if your answer is 'Yes' to all these attributes. GO! DO IT! Don't look back for a second! Maybe I'll see you on TV or an Internet show someday.
As for college, maybe pick a university that allows you to be undecided for two years until your junior year. One that has both scientific pursuits available as well as something in the Hotel Restaurant management area. Bonus points for one near a CIA (Culinary Institute of America) school if you haven't already been looking at those schools.
For family, that's the most difficult part. I'm third generation away from farmers. My family pressed us to work hard at being someone in the sciences because it was the safe bet. Don't make my mistake. Go for your strengths not what everyone else THINKS your strengths are.
Good luck and may your choices be free of incident.
I face the same problem. I'm so tired of having my decisions made by someone else and obeying everything that they assume to be the right choice. This is supposed to be my life. However, I am forced to live the life they believe suited me. I really want to pursue psychology but I'm forced to choose accounting because it is the easy way (my father even thinks that I'm too dumb to have a career in science majors like pharmacist, nursing,... even though these jobs earn good amount of money & demand is always high). Anyway, I understand that if I choose the "wrong" path, not only am I doomed but I will become a burden to them. Thus they feel that it is necessary to push me into the "right" and straighter path. It's all about money plus pride in Asian culture. They want to introduce their children to their friends as successful doctors, lawyers, businessmen,...blablabla besides being assured that their children have stable jobs. I'm stressed like you because I don't want to have no control over my own life but I'm also tired of confronting and arguing with them for something that I have every right to have "the freedom to make my own choices." I know that I will have to take responsibility for my mistakes and failures. My father would probably be like "see, I told you. This happened because you didn't obey me." However, even if I will fail in life at least I will learn from my failures and stand up after falling down instead of being walked like a dog with a leash on me my whole damn life and feel miserable and regret that I allowed others to dictate me this way.
Thank you for uploading this video. There are many people who feel as though subservience is part of their duty, which causes an absence of ideas that are their own. We aren't robots; neither should we act as if we're programmed as one.
In my humble opinion, the best you can do is to create a bussiness of whatever you want, to sustain you economically, but actually spend your time and effort in what you love. There's the balance.
School of Life: How to make someone feel desperate, hopeful, happy, sad, cheerful and depressed in a single video and at the same time. Love it.
🤣🤣
So true. Well put!
Limón de mar.
this has got to be the biggest load of baloney I have heard in a long time, why can't an individual be the best janitor in the world, but be passionate about flamenco guitar? I could go on but this is the type of thing that will keep people from finding truly meaningful work that will enable them to have the resources to truly explore their passions. what happens if my passion is knitting but I am a terrible knitter? and there is no way to make a living as a knitter? should I pursue it as a career ? This is why we have a work place filled with people who think it is the employers job to fulfill their dreams
That sounds almost like something from Monty Python (no offense, I just had a good laugh!). It is one of the fundamental things about any passion to be brutally honest with yourself. One can't measure talent, only accomplishment (and even that is debatable). Many people seem to be passionate about things for the wrong reasons (they like the results, not the steep way). I can only talk about flamenco guitar. Loving to listen to flamenco music is one thing. Taking a guitar into your hands and start fiddling - and you feel the passion about actually playing it yourself and finding your way around the strings and frets - not giving a flying beep about what others may think: that's passion! It's about playing the guitar, not a particular style. Passion and talent don't always match - obviously - but you only know if you are passionate about anything if you are actually doing it, working your butt off until your fingers bleed, and still liking it (not the bleeding part)! Passion is loving doing something - really loving it. You will seek teachers (who are very hard to find if you are not into anything "socially accepted") and any source of information you can get your hands on. Being "good" at something is impossible to define. Just browse through CZcams. You will find from any field people who are terribly bad - and people who are brilliant. Being "good " at something is not an absolute. You are good at something when you start feeling "I'm getting somewhere". Perfection is impossible. No one with half a brain expects anyone to pay for that. It's only that we need the money. That's all there is.
1:19
This resonates really strongly. "Sometimes we have to do things that we don't like to do." "You can't play until your work is finished." "Do your homework!"
Words that sounded the end of my childhood, very very early.
i don't think people understand that these videos bring out the unspoken nature of humans. if you find this disturbing then its a sign that there is something wrong with the systems and institutions in place.
SO much fear in these comments from dutiful people.
It makes one sadder. Looking at them.
Hey school of life, I love the video. I feel it resonates strongly with me, however, Im not sure how to find a thing I want to do. Im sure others feel as I do, can I suggest you make a video on the topic?
I been feeling like this for years...
There already was one? You guys are literally the best.
Find your genius
MAKE A VIDEO ON DEALING WITH DORKS IN EVERYDAY LIFE
Are you new to the Internet, or trolling...or just social spaces in general?
You mean like you
Lol, his profile picture fits the comment perfectly
While anyone agrees with the result of doing something you "love" for a living, the main problem with this video is the means it proposes. It either tells people to quit their current careers, switch majors without knowing what to expect or puts extra anxiety on the young people's decision of a career path.
While it is true that school is too focused on duty, and rarely are teachers able to ignite that spark of curiosity in students, it does teach us how to be disciplined; and that is a very important quality in life.
Rather than finding that job you love, why not bring love to your job? Yes, we all have an idea of what would rather be doing for a living, but it either is not perfect, or we cannot have it. So, just try to morph your current job into what you would enjoy better. The wave of programs to make employees happy is an indicative that employers would help you get it since maximizing your well-being is in their best interest.
many people hate their jobs simply because it's not their desired career.. if I work for bank I won't enjoy it.. I wanna work outdoors as a tour guide... so I can't bring love to a job I hate..
I'm majoring in a major, and pursuing in a job that I don't like. When I do the job, I will be frustrated, bored, and mad. I will bring the company no good except for bad vibes. So I do a disservice to them and a disservice to myself. What would you suggest?
I've found that often people do tend to put their own creativity and passions into what ever they end up doing. I think the dangerous jobs are the ones who disregard your passions and enthusiasm and only want execution.
***** I'm sure you would agree. I am currently watching your Philosophy playlist so i have a vague sense of your stances. Perhaps i am biased to this idea, but what i have found is that someone who hasn't found the right job is often completely unaware of what is it they want. This stance is comparable to one video you have saying that people shouldn't be looking for "the one" in love, and your stance there is that it is a work in progress that needs commitment. Take your initial preferences and work from there, rather than standing static until finding such prefered job or carrer. (of course, im assuming enough information)
King shaimus Morwanza ishowyouapple When having this discussion it is assumed that people have certain preferences and choose accordingly. I mentioned in my comment how people prefer some subjects over others in school.
The actual problem people face is that once they get new information regarding their major or job, they realize they dont like it. If someone is deliberately entering a job they despise without something that ofsets the displeasure (money), then that is irrational and shouldn't even be discussed.
Storm Gaming Media I agree with you. I personally experienced something of the sort. I was at a job i thought i would love before entering, but the boss was horrible. I was miserable until they fired him (i accidentally smiled). I was in the same company, the same coworkers, i was just given the opportunity to do things the way i thought was in the best interest of the company. The result is that i was at the peak of my productivity in my career. Clearly King shaimus Morwanza If you want to be outside there is no way that, all else being equal, you would prefer a job indoors (i'm simplifying). However, consider the actual qualities of the job that you find attractive. What if your were misserable at your job but they allowed you to shape the work environment so that you could be outside (again, simplifying). Wouldn't that be in both parties best interest? rather than just saying let's part ways. Clearly, if that's a dealbreaker then you would have to part ways. But i find that it is far less risky and would yield a higher payoff to stay in the job under some negotiated conditions.
Its just saying, focus on your love, even with the boring. The ending scene shows that well. Dont forget to live in the now. Not the future your path is 'going' to put you on.
Actually this explains why I find being a parent quite difficult (especially as my son gets older) because I don't really agree with pushing the whole duty thing even though society expects it
Same here: I stuck with my passion (it was inevitable anyway). Even though I have no problem saying that I am good at it - it eventually lead to being in constant financial trouble. Especially creative professions are not truly supported by Western society. "Follow your dreams" is (IMHO) very bad advice. How I wish it was good advice. It isn't. People without true passion for the arts (not money or success - just because it's in the DNA) have it so much easier. Go study and get a good day job, kids! Trust me!
P.S. anyone wanting to reply: "Make your own channel": I have two of them. :-)
I agree with you I followed my dream and while it was amazing I am so so poor and starting over because I was told that following your heart would lead to true success nope it dosent lol
Indeed man, I'm more physically and musically inclined than any of my friends, and they sometimes go on about how they wish they had those "talents" (really just hobbies I've devoted thousands of hours to) but what they don't always think about is the fact these passions have very little monitory potential compared to theirs (electrical, carpentry, welding, pipe-fitting etc) and I'll never be satisfied with a trades job even if it means $70,000+ a year, and I'll likely be a broke educator for the majority of my life
Well I fully respect that, but what exactly is the point if not: try to do what you love? Once you are in a (say) office job, you simply have to merely follow your duty. No room for anything else. No choices to be made. And I didn't blindly follow my dreams. I accepted (and still do) a lot of compromises, some are/were even chores - just as much as an office job would be. I am fully aware that I can't just compose and play the music I like, make the movies I like and expect to earn at least enough to make a living. But even with tons of compromises, adapting to reality and "being reasonable" - it doesn't work out. I can only repeat: creativity (including very hard work on the stony way to achieving anything resembling skills and accomplishment) is unfortunately completely unsupported by our system and culture. Nobody cares except our colleagues.
All is fine! Yes the "survivorship bias". I'm glad I know about it. Anyway: here's the catch: If you are into the arts, you can't help it. I wouldn't survive one day in a boring office job. Entrepreneur? The Shool Of Life talks about "playing the lottery of life" in another video - and it definitely applies here. Now: if you are into anything similar to arts, you can't have a "day job" and do it in your spare time (I already gave up making films for a living decades ago, I'm a full time pro musician), you don't have enough time left. After an 8 hr day, driving to and fro - and with a family, you will have a few hours a week (if that much). The arts: either you do it full time or you don't. If you do it just in your spare time you will be less than mediocre and never achieving (not talking about accomplishment or recognition) anything - you'd be better off giving it up altogether. Art is not about doing it a little here and a little there. It's a hard, very had way to do what's born with you. Only when you start to feel (for example) "Hey, I am getting somewhere on the piano, I start to feel it!" - that's what you desperately need. That takes hundreds if not thousands of hours of practice and performing, not only at home, but in real jobs, on stage (even if criminally underpaid). There is no way having a day job and doing what you are actually meant for just in your spare time. Only people with that desire in their hearts will ever understand: it's not even a choice. Art chooses you. - I am not talking about people getting delusional regarding money and fame. The true artist (this already sounds ridiculous, see what I mean?) needs to do do and perform art. Once they reach a certain age, even competition doesn't matter anymore. The only competition is yourself. I had a few times the opportunity to write for full orchestra and actually get it recorded. It took me years to get there (through hard studying, reading, computers, courses - picking up on every shred of information available....). It's moments of true fulfillment, even if the pieces weren't that awesome. At least they were professionally done and sounded great. That moment when you hear your hard work being actually played in front of you: I won't want to exchange that for a life living in security.
That's not living. For an artist it isn't. For me it isn't. But if you are in hopes to get rich and famous, instead of feeling it inside of you: study and get a day job.
Tudo na aboa! Grande abração! :-)
i completely agree with some of what u said, the jealousy of our colleagues should spur us for a better performance not otherwise, here some quotes, every problem is a solution in disguise, and u will always get the same result of doing the same thing over and over, so in order to overcome this there are some ways of course, either get really good at your job,be creative on ur duty before others, growing or following ur hobbies by the extra spare time u got, or enhance ur skills and passion of the same work u r doing, like actually liking it and will always try to improve, keep the good points and change ur mistakes, that is the only cure if u dont have a capital to run ur own businesses, which most of us are , perseverance is very important, now the major and one of the most important factor is( PLANING) every successful fellow had a plan, dont believe what u hear, just wing it and inadvertently u will see ur self some better place, no, planing and perseverance which of course take some time, and u have to like what u do to get better at it, learn from ur colleagues but dnt dnt envy them, very crucial to boost ur self esteem, believe me, the things ur throw away like gossip, and replacing it new, crude information is the beneficial course of action u should always follow, its not easy yet its not impossible, colleagues will always try to pull ur legs, ur mind is ur friend if u know how to use it properly, always be realistic but not common, a little too far isnt bad if u know u can achieve it, most people just sit and blame time, family, everything except themselves, its you and only you shall walk this path to achieve ur goal. what ever it is.if others can do it , then u can do more, if u believe u can, no one can stop u, at the end it comes down to u and how u will progress from this point on.
"I Know Of Only One Duty... and that Is To Love" ~Albert Camus
It's so weird how a lot of your videos seem to be uploaded when they are needed. Like rn for me I just got out of highschool n dam I've been feeling the duty vs passion thing for awhile now. Anyways good shot keep up the good work
I think some people may be misunderstanding this. I don’t think the message is necessary “quit your day job and pursue your fantasy,” although that *could* be the message for the right situation. For a lot of us, I think the message is to think about the work you already do differently if you can. If it’s unrealistic to leave your job, then a shift in perspective can help you find meaning and be more daring and creative in that setting. And that is necessary not only for fulfillment but for success
Nobody has a passion for plumbing.
What the school of life forgot to mention is that the reason why the duty and follow your passions dichotomy exists is because most jobs out there don't require much imagination - they are mostly bullshit tedious, repetitive, and mind numbing jobs. The creative activities which require problem solving and applying skills and knowledge into creating new concepts are only held by a small number of hands- the rest are scripted and highly structured around the desires of those who hold the creative jobs - which only means that they are auxiliary to the creatives. The education system is a job preparation system not a follow your passion system for exactly that reason- just adapt to your bullshit job and get your kicks outside from your job.
Yes just make sure you aren't passionate about anything that doesn't pay well ;)
The School of Life, you are the best!!! Can't believe I find this video right at the time I'm questioning myself all over what I should do with my life, whether do things others expecting me to do or enjoy my choice of life to do what I am good at!! You are the best!!!!!! Thanks for the videos, I adore them all!!!! Xx
This makes me wanna cry. I don't wanna go on anymore
Now, Tori, why do you feel that way?
Duty and pleasure in work are not mutually exclusive at all. As the video mentions, doing work you enjoy is a form a duty you have towards yourself and also enforces a duty towards your craft that makes you get very good at it in the long run. This brings a lot of value to you and to society.
The less you enjoy the work you do, the more compensation you expect for it (in money, recognition, obedience, etc.) which brings a lot of bitterness to you and the "beneficiaries" of your sacrifice.
you have such a way of complicating things, here: *all work and no play makes jack a dull boy*
That duty book is called "reality" and reality says we need to get good grades, get into university, have a decent paying job, have some kids, fill in the remaining time with sleep or if you have the time and energy fill it in with doing something you like and then we just die.
this is practically my whole life. in high school i always thought that having good grades meant a secure future and a high probability of getting a job and being successful. i viewed those who were having fun like like they were not conscious about their future which made me disassociate with people whose goal was not to work. But i actually noticed that most of my peers who were tryna have fun , make more friends and be social already understood the dangers of being dutiful. Today i feel like a have a lot of psychological disorders like schizophrenia, adhd and i'm hundred percent sure i have social anxiety. This system is so fucked up forcing student to study and have good grades for a better future whereas they know it's a lie. i' mma tell my kids to have hella fun and not worry so much about being the best in the classroom. Being intelligent on paper is different from being intelligent in real life.
As much as I agree that we are able to show our most creative side and be most productive when doing what we love, it is imperative that we also learn to love what we do. Most things in the beginning may seem dull and boring, even a research scientist had to start with the mundane concepts of calculus and perhaps the basic atomic structure before moving on to truly exciting and inspirational ground-breaking work. Yes, everyone has their own area of interest, but we are too often blinded by the idea of passion that we refuse to give something that we might learn to love a chance just because we are ingrained with the idea that we ought to do something we should already like.
Thank you School of life, I'll follow your advice and bring my colouring book to the office tomorrow
The last part about thinking of our own death really made me wonder a lot about my current life choices. I'm starting to think of what I want the world, or at least people who know me, to remember me as when I die. It really does motivate you to do something meaningful and see life differently.
This channel haw grown rather large, and the comment section is filled with amazing insights about each video, which makes it unlikely at best that you'll read this comment. so School Of Life, if you're reading this, mind if I ask you to make a video about the drug wars in Mexico and the effects of living in constant fear an class disparity?
I ussually take a bus to school on one of the poorest sections of the city and leads me to the very center with all the nice houses and walls made for only decorative purpouses so it's emphasized the disparity between classes of the haves and have nots. If you do make a video on the matter (or have already made one) I would love to help with the translation as a way to give back a little of all you've given to me.
Also, if you lack examples, I'd be more than willing to get in touch and describe the political climate around said topics.
I'm glad to see you finally added captions on your videos. It is not only a very considerate act but a necessary one given the content you create.
This really got to me! I'm 21 and consider to apply to med school. I have an interest(not sure of passion but it was my favorit subject) in biology and what i've found in earlier jobs is that the things that keeps me going is the satisfaction of helping others. I also contemplate to go for a music career. Making music is probably what I think I'm best at and also what I enjoy the most. The thing is that i'm not sure if it's something I'd like to work with for the rest of my life and I would't like that passion to tarnish by turning it in to a "must do". I mean I can always have it as a sideproject at my spare time? Any ideas of how to think?
i study medical chemistry (which is my passion and is economically viable) and write music on the side (another passion which i understand is not anywhere near as economically viable)
i have a DJ residency on the weekends and have played at numerous festivals - sure it would be nice to be on a grand stage playing for hundreds of thousands but at the end of the day i accomplished what i wanted in music and anything more is simply a 'blessing' if you will
you can make it work mang, you just gotta put the effort in - as they say "if there's a will, there's a way"
but just be mindful of the fact that if you're going to study medicine, you're not going to have much time to work on music once you get to your last year and then do an honours / phd
I was once a loser and then when I got a job, I am so grateful that I want to give my best. Even though it was not my dream, (cause I have other dreams in my mind but I couldn't afford it) I embrace the job, learn to love what I do and have to do. It went well and now I am a successful woman. Recently, I saw a Ted Ex talk that following your passion is not a good advice. So, thanks Mom and Dad for doing what you think best for your child.
OMG this is so true. I have always loved the arts. Why am i majoring in COMputer Science?!?!?!?!?
Because you don't want to end up poor in an extremely competitive economy.
Who says that the arts and computer science are opposites? You might end up making artwork/music for a gaming company or an animation studio. Computer science can be very flexible if you're a bit creative.
Computer science can lead to artistic type jobs especially animation and editing is pretty fun to play around with, just need to explore your option and find what you like, then stick with it
Coming from a com sci grad, coding is like... 80% art.
You're going through a similar path that I've been , but it's not too late to change . I've finally had the courage to quit after working 3 years of Computer Engineering. I had all benefits , high pay , insurance , benefits , job security. all of that couldn't make me forget how much l liked playing music ...
Perhaps this is applicable outside of Scripture, but those of us who believe there is something bigger than ourselves, that gives us a sense of duty from a very young age...we begin to do our duty very young...not just at five or six.
We do everything that we do for our Creator, and that instills a sense of love and worship in even simple acts -- I'm a stay-at-home mother and most wouldn't get any pleasure out of remedial tasks like changing diapers, scrubbing toilets, mopping, cooking...I don't particularly enjoy those things.
But it is my duty to do them...and I do my duty in a cheerful way. :)
And I teach my children to do the same. Love work, love your duty. Happiness is fleeting. But you can have joy, even in the darkest moments.
Shalom.
These videos are always so good
The School of Life: please create a video about how one can navigate the reality-how one can best craft compromises related to the fact-that for most people, because of insufficient talent or simply the cost of living and other obligations, one's passion most likely will *not* also be a viable career path, that passions will probably need to be reserved for weekends and evenings (presuming that one's day job, health, and so forth affords such free time at all!).
This is why I have no fucking idea what to do with my life, especially since working with the public really depresses me.
I agree 100%! I have been finding this out first hand. And I read a book by a rich dude who said something similar. Getting a "normal" or "safe" career really is not the path to wealth, it's a big trap. :/
Sigh...damned if you do and damned if you don't is all there is to it.
These inept suggestive videos are entertaining can can be thought provoking.
But damned if it works and damned if it doesn't.
There are just too many factors in life to cut out just a theme and call it the right one.
Why do you do it if you are supposed to be so wise, School of Life?
Though I would love to be able to help apply the theme of this video for my kids, the fact is that I myself grew up in a broken home, moved all around the world with no guidance on duty and planning from anyone. So all I did was following my passions and emotions. So let me tell you that there are not all rainbow and butterflies to it. Fuck if life is so simple as shifting the balance from one base to another and everything is bliss.
Duty is just as important as anything else.
Passion, heart and whatever is no more important than anything else either.
Sure you know then that you should say "some of us" and not "we", right? Sure I understand it wouldn't flow as well, but then the fact is that you conciously chose to distort the truth to serve your own purpose. That was my complain.
I agree with you.
Some of the best advice I got was "Chase the opportunity first, and the dream second."
If you know you are good at something or that is a good investment, do that. What we are good at has a way of becoming our passion. And if not you are at least making good enough money to fund a passion.
Dreams have a way of always being disappointments because we over hype them in our minds.
Yes. Invest in what you are good at. If you are able to be dutyful to something then you probably good at it. Why the hell must that be a burden, right. Finding joy and passion in your path doesn't mean realising you have been tricked on out something else. Embracing what you've got is more to my liking.
I think that anything at all can be bad in excess. Too much duty or too much freedom will ruin you. You have to use moderation.
The thing about moderation is that it is too vague, too elusive of a concept. Whether or not the human mind is at all capable of comprehending what time and space is, is unanswerable. How then can we fathom what factors is accounted for in our perception of what balance is. Control might just be an illusion, as they say.
This one is a hit-and-miss. It may be an imperfect system but instilling our children with duty, will for the most part point them in the right direction of how modern society works and a good work ethic goes a long way to sustain oneself. Not everyone feels more "free" being a starving artist. Having a good office job with a stable income is underrated these days.
Be sure to remember though, people will only give you money if you provide them with something they want that is of value. No one will pay you anything otherwise. So try aline your passion with a way to make a living, if not, then having it as a hobby is always ok. What do I care though, do whatever the F*** you wanna do! Just don't be a parasite on others..
I have been doing very inportant desicions lately by this logic. Never felt freer or happier. Its a struggle, but I'm happy.
lol i hope eddy doesn't see this, so he can lose faith in his scams lol
I stuck out with my passion and it has put me in financial trouble but it escaped me from a mental disaster. Sure I can't afford a thing or two but I am happy and proud of who I am, and I think that matters more to me than money.
I dont completely disagree... but this just isnt realistic anymore. There is no wiggle room for escaping duty when you live in poverty. For me the pressures are so heavy, I forgot how to enjoy myself if im not being actively dutiful. Even if im aware I have a hard time escaping the anxiety.
Hexx just wait till you have to start working full time.
Really well done video! I very much enjoyed it, keep up the good work.
DON'T PUT THE HEART IN THE BOX AJDHIAOAKJAYQJDKW
This channel always posts videos relevant to my life at the moment!!!
I wish you can provide spanish subs :( I love your videos but I'm not really good in english and I feel I miss some parts of the contents. You're awesome. I'll hope soon can share with my non english speakers friends and relatives
go for it man
Girl :( and.. I didn't know that anybody could introduce subs to any video. I just looked in google xD
go for it girl, it'd be cool to have both there. Im currently trying to learn Spanish. Your efforts would be felt indefinitely.
Done. They're being reviewed, though.
Thank you very much, its really helpful to hear and read simultaneously! :)
You make people feel no more guilt doing what they love.
And you do that by such an intense yet gentle explaination.
You set people free in the most beautiful way possible.
This is idealistic tripe. Not everyone will have the opportunity to have a career they'll love, or even like, but they still have an obligation to contribute to society. Standing out from the crowd is not a common thing even if you love your labor, otherwise there wouldn't be a crowd to stand out from. Besides, there won't always be a great demand for what you "want". There will always be "needs", however, and if society is to function, the needs must be met, even if that means people have to work menial jobs with no hope of advancement, at least they _have_ a job.
You can spout forth platitudes and put in flowery visuals but it doesn't change the reality that all things are not, and will never be, equal. Most people will have to contribute from a sense of duty since it is virtually impossible to get someone to "love" their job if meat processing, or garbage disposal, or whatever horrible but necessary job you can think of.
Your perspective could only come from the flower-filled world of modern academia, where every day idiot children try to validate their life choice to become a musician, or a writer, or whatever will keep them from having to sit at a desk and truly contribute to society. Only a minuscule percent of them will have the talent and vision to become artists of note. The rest will go on to either regret the fact that they had no amount of foresight, or blame society for telling them "you can do anything", when they really, _really_ couldn't. I've been watching it happen for years and it never gets any less funny.
This is was moving and very well-said
I think you are prescribing a different meaning to the video than was intended.
He doesn't say this is the only way to live, but that society has put more imperative on the aspect of duty than modern society requires.
And it is always quite surprising how many people actually enjoy those jobs which you might describe as "menial".
jourdain solis
If you're talking about what I said; thank you. If you're talking about the video; I disagree, but you're entitled to your opinion.
*****
But it isn't because they enjoy the job itself, they enjoy whatever sense of fulfillment they can garner from doing a job that needs doing, it's the duty that motivates them. I feel that if you live in a situation that allows you to lift yourself from the mire of a life of menial labor, then it is _your_ duty to take the fullest advantage of that, even if that means that you have to shoot for the middle and take a career path that is more reliable, not more interesting. Sure, it might not be as fun as your dream career, but most dream careers are that way because they are, in some way, unrealistic.
Duty isn't "dangerous", it's necessary. While you're in college it might seem like every path in the world is open to you, but you'll find that if what you want is not in demand (and oftentimes you'll only find that upon entry into the work field) that you would've been better off spending your time and money on trying to get a career that fits the needs of society better, instead of trying to satisfy your individual desires. Instead we have about 2 or 3 generations of children raised on flighty ideas that roughly equate to "the needs of the many are subordinate to my own", and to me, this video represents that in a profoundly irritating way.
It is a profoundly selfish person who looks at life and says "People sacrificed time, effort and even their lives for thousands, maybe millions of years to bring society to where it is today, for people like me, but this is *my* life, and I'm going to either spend it doing something I like or not spend it at all." The reminder of death should not be your motivator, the thought of "how will I be remembered" should. We are social animals, after all, it's only natural.
like that one prager university video that says "Don't follow your dreams, but always take them with you"
This video just brings up my loathsome feelings about school all over again. Right out of college I started up a self employed home business making costumes and have been highly successful doing so for near 10 years now, and it is the only job I have ever had, I live each day doing something I love and living my life vert much on my own terms, I don't have to conform to much of societies day to day expectations or schedule and thus I am really only on the very edge of the usual rat race of life... and thus I feel so much hate for my school years, I was lucky and had parents that only cared that I passed my classes and did not force me into after school activities, but even minus these pressures I remember being so miserable so much of my school years, and seeing where I ended up in life I feel like school merely wasted my youth.
Dear Alain, I love your videos, they are generally thought provoking and great for initiating debates and discussions in the classroom. However, this has caused universal derision among my students, and all of them really want me to comment on how totally out of touch this sounds. Sorry. But this is truly awful. What about extreme social and economic inequality? Have you heard about the burden of debt? Are you aware that it is practically impossible to live debt free? I'm incredibly frugal with my cash, I work hard and I find it nearly impossible to pay rent (let alone own a house) and - get this - I am one of the really, really lucky ones! As a teacher, I HAVE A JOB I REALLY LOVE *GASP*! I am also intelligent enough to realize that I am the exception, NOT the rule. I look at my siblings and school friends and they are genuinely suffering. What about a unilateral two tier justice system that privileges the wealthy? How about mass incarcerations and the criminalization of huge numbers of the populace? What about the militarization of our police forces and the state sanctioned violence against the citizenry? Most people, in western cultures, as well as throughout the 'neo-liberal' world that I have encountered in my journey, have these options in life: 1 - A low paid job in the service industries. 2 - A career in the military breaking into houses, often in the middle-east, and shooting people in front of their families, only to return to a community that has been gutted by faceless corporate greed. 3 - Prison. That's it. Yes, I am relying on brevity to make my point, but given the nature of this forum, I am sure you will agree, it is warranted. I really love the power of ideas that you so carefully profess, but you have to realize that a vast majority of the people on this planet simply DO NOT have the choices you have had in life, the game is rigged against them and they know it. Maybe you might want to climb down from the celebrity book tour circuit every now and then and have a look at just how shitty this world can be when you don't have a family name and a bank account to back it up. Most people don't get chance after chance after chance, they don't even get one chance. Wake. Up.
+Tryg Verran I'm going to have to offer the alternative paradigm to your world view. Life IS what you make of it. It's OK to be IN the world, just not OF the world. Meaning, who told you success meant a 9-5 with retirement and health benefits? Who told you that owning a home is the only solution to a meaningful adult life? Who told you to take on all this debt? Did you ever step outside of yourself and look at the absurdity that has become our modern westernized way of life?
It took me way too long to find my path. I had a split childhood. One with my father and traveling the world. Having never set foot into a classroom until I was old enough to be the equivalent of a 4th grader. Then spending the rest of my youth into adolescents in the system as a foster child and group home transient. There I was told to go to college, get a good paying career, get married and have kids. Retire then die. But deep down I never felt right about those choices that seemed to be pre-ordained for me. I struggled with finding a career that I would essentially be stuck with the rest of my life. (or seemed like it anyway) Point is, I was never fully indoctrinated. I got to the party late, and everyone else already drank the kool-aid. I had broader life experiences before I was 9. I had been places, experienced cultures. Didn't appreciate it at the time, I'm sure. It wasn't until I was told to sit still and take tests for no good reason, that I knew this wasn't for me. This wasn't it. Took me until I was nearly 30 before I had an AH-HA moment and went towards something that truly excited me. But the deck was stacked against me, with no training in those fields, no money to start and no one to ask or rely on... I truly had to just force my way in... and in some respects, I still don't feel like I'm quite there yet.
But in all our life experiences, we always had free choice. Maybe not always in action, but certainly in thought! This is the key to happiness in life. It's your thoughts that make up your experiences to be construed as either good or bad. Taking out the trash, as a kid, can seem sooo lame and a total bummer. Because that's the thought paradigm you've associated with the activity. You feel like you didn't have a choice... but you did. You could have thought, OK, this is a great opportunity to get rid of waste and rubbish out of the place where I eat and sleep. Maybe on the way I can sort out the recyclables and do my part to help the planet. See how the difference of thought changed the activity from dread to a positive healthy aspect for both you and the planet? This brings me to your concern about the social injustices that you witness and feel so passionately about. I'll fix this for you real quick: IT'S NOT YOUR PROBLEM. Only you are responsible for your thoughts and actions. You attract situations into your life that you are in alignment with. A vibrational match. You are not going to be kicking down doors in the middle east, because you are not in alignment with that path, now are you? So, therefore it's technically not your concern and not your problem. If you didn't have a T.V. would you know about mass incarcerations, state sanctioned violence against its people? No... you'd simply go on about your day, making sure your needs and your family's needs were met.
Now, it's a nice sentiment to want to help others, and we SHOULD help those who we can immediately help in the here and now. But our realities are shaped within our thoughts. And if we think about things we don't like, they eventually become our reality. Which makes us unhappy, which further brings us more (perceived) bad luck.
Amazingly well put! Thank you!!
one reminder... if you're lucky and you job is what you like it doesn't mean it will be easy or many times not boring but biggest difference is that you don't feel you're wasting time doing something that doesn't interest you at all.
School of Life have/will you consider doing a video on Alan Watts? I have recently found him, and find some of his ideas quite enlightening.
***** Thank you for the reply! I have noticed that some of his ideas, albeit put in different terms, are quite similar to some of the things you teach.
I am biologist, I'm one of those people that is actually working in what they wanted to do when the were kids, but even tho I love my job, I love being in the field collecting plants and bringing them to the herbarium to identify them when is time to do final reports I feel the duty is here to remind me that I am an adult I'm not a girl playing to be a botanist.
But I have understood that I don't need to compete with other biologist I trust my work and my ideas and I didn't study biology to become a millionaire I'm doing what I love and that's enough, I don't need international recognition or being an influence to all scientific community, and even less in a society like south american where you only can scale if you are friend with someone really rich or with a lot of power. I just need stability and keep doing what I love and if I keep trusting my work and my ideas maybe I can some day do a really big discovery and be a famous scientist or maybe not, I don't know.
to be fair though, she could barely draw shapes
I've been so focused on duty, I think I've forgotten what my passion is!
I simply can't agree with the theses laid out in this video. To be honest, it comes off as a hedonistic creed that encourages the listener to never do anything unless it's "fun," which is an excellent way to fail at everything in life - including the things one enjoys! At best it's poorly phrased; at worst it's complete nonsense. I mean, doing the dishes isn't especially "fun" for most people... but somebody has to wash them! There are duties that you can't avoid no matter how pleasure-oriented your life is, and this video draws zero distinction between those and, say, a dead-end desk job.
The first sign of trouble is at 0:23, when the narrator mentions in passing that "as soon as something gets frustrating or boring, we simply give up and go in search of new sources of enjoyment." The narration as a whole never seems to examine this assertion further, setting up an implicit contrast between pleasure-oriented "giving up" and pain-oriented "duty." This is problematic because *everything* is "frustrating or boring" at times. No matter what your passion is, if you want to make a living from it there are going to be frustrating times when you have to push up against your limits or against the system you work within in order to improve and succeed. And there are going to be dull pragmatic elements - promotion, sales, travel, paperwork, etc. - that you must force yourself to do if you want to make any money at all. If you're lucky or very focused, perhaps your passion will let you flow right over these, but giving up as soon as a pursuit is less than pleasurable is a tactic that will see you abandon everything you ever touch.
I also disagree with the dramatic dichotomy drawn between a purely pleasure-driven world of ages 0-5 and a purely duty-driven world forced on us thereafter. My two-year-old son already knows about his "duty" to clean away his dishes after a meal or put away his books and toys after use and so on, and much of the time he does those things without even being asked. When I make dinner or sweep the floor, he tries to help, and I let him (although he's not getting to use the sharp knives yet!). If a child is raised correctly, there should never be a shocking dividing line between pleasure and duty as one ages; there should simply be a gradient of responsibilities.
The scene drawn shortly after the one-minute mark is similarly flawed. If a child doesn't "see the point" of writing an essay, then getting angry and invoking authority or "duty" certainly are bad parenting techniques... but that doesn't mean it's fine to avoid the "duty" of the essay! The point of writing is dual: to explore ideas, and to get better at expressing yourself. And both of these are indispensable tools for being a functioning social animal such as a human. The response to a child's boredom or frustration with an assignment should be to explain what the point is (if they're old enough to really conceptualize it), or to find a way to help them engage with it (e.g. ask what they find interesting about volcanoes, or show them some things about volcanoes that *you* find interesting as a model).
The following assertion that adult duties are purely pain and especially that they can never be done well because only pleasure can truly engage us (~2:45-50) is, to put it bluntly, false. It's relatively simple to engage oneself in almost any task, from tedious jobs like dish-washing to challenging reading and writing or math, if one has conducive habits of mind.
The biggest thing that strikes me about all this is that nobody involved in the making of this video has ever been to Japan. Japanese culture is even more weighted toward "duty" than the West, and tends to frame the performance of "frustrating" or "boring" tasks in a very different light. Where this video stresses the "pain" of duty and contrasts it with pleasure, and seems to advocate avoiding any task that doesn't give you a rush of endorphins, Japanese culture stresses the need to find a way to engage in whatever task you find in front of you.
Think about the dishes again. This video suggests that a sink full of dirty dishes is a land-mine of pain, and we wash them because we have been habituated to do so by authority figures when we'd rather be off doodling in a book. But if nobody ever does anything unless they feel ahead of time that they will "enjoy" it, then who will do the dishes? Not enough people to meet the demand! The traditional Japanese approach is to take the dishes as a fact of life, and to ask the reader to engage with them as fully as possible because that is the way to lead a fulfilling life. Washing a plate may not give you a rush of joy, but focusing on the act *can* give you a sense of flow and engagement with the moment, and producing a nice clean plate *can* give a sense of satisfaction with a job well done.
Most Westerners will associate this attitude with "zen," perhaps, and while that's not entirely accurate to Zazen practice and thought, it's a good guide. Our society is full of "boring" but indispensable tasks starting with household chores and extending through truck-driving, garbage-collection, desk-work administration, and lots and lots of reading and writing. If only the people who found pure pleasure in these tasks performed them, then society would collapse within a week as trash piled up, food ran out, and disease ran rampant. The solution to boredom or frustration is therefore not avoidance but "zen"-style engagement with each task - building up and then using (exercising and then exercising?) the mental ability to focus on any task you find before yourself and then to find satisfaction and fulfillment in a job well done after.
This is not to say that passions shouldn't be followed or that everyone should be a desk worker, dish washer, or truck driver! If you have a burning passion for art, then by all means make art, even if it means less financial stability than a job scrolling and clicking at a desk. Society does need artists and reporters and explorers and other "exciting" jobs, after all. And yes, we should all try to weigh what we want out of life and follow that instead of being impelled by fear to simply do what some random authority expects or desires of us.
But in the long run, a more nuanced view of "duty" is needed than what this video presents. What we should pursue in life is not pleasure, but engagement. And we should cultivate a mindset that allows us to find engagement in any task that's set before us, because even the most passionate pursuit will eventually lead to a moment of boredom or frustration, and it is only through finding engagement and satisfaction from even those moments that we can truly succeed in life.
I'm not really familiar with Korean culture, I'm afraid. What does your Seoul office think?
Seems to me he's saying to please yourself in what you do for work, not for what others tell you is best for you.
Very well said! Thank you!!
obvious things that we never stop to think about.