r/Maliciouscompliance I Gave A Cop A Bottle Of My Pee
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- čas přidán 15. 04. 2021
- r/Maliciouscompliance OP is a trucker who has to make a pit stop every 2-3 hours to relieve himself. During one of his regularly scheduled pit stops, he has to go in a bottle instead of off the side of the road. Well, a cop pulls him over and suspects that he's up to no good, and the cop demands OP prove that he wasn't doing anything illegal. OP happily complies by handing over a bottle of his warmest, freshest brew!
👌 r/Maliciouscompliance "GO ANSWER THE PHONES" "I'm deaf, but OK" • r/Maliciouscompliance ...
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"Sneaky Snitch" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
License: CC By Attribution 3.0 - Komedie
This guy named OP must have had it tough dealing with entitled parents, sucky neighbours, and nightmarish bosses.
Makes you think how does this guy have so many aliases?
LOL
I know, poor guy
Ohpi has certainly has their share of woes
@nikola plays on
Movers: *Furniture and stuff damaged*
And is _fast_
Lady: _”Wow what a professional”_
nice pfp
no sad allowed
More like
Movers: Moves furniture and stuff gets damaged
Movers: "But we did it fast"
Lady: "So professional"
The reason mom was angry about her child waking up early is the lack of control. She felt like she was controlling everything until she saw something happening that she wasn't a part of. She pulled a super bitch move on her child
and physically and mentally abused him for it
PS gospel music
Imagine punishing your kid for waking up at a perfectly reasonable time. Usually it's sleeping in you get punished for.
Lately my daughter has been going to bed early and waking up early to play video games. I honestly don’t care as long as her homework is done, she had plenty of sleep and fully dressed by a certain time for school.
Mine likes to stay up late...playing games, and get up early...to play games. If the situation is anything like mine, which mine likes to deny, I can see mom having concerns. For one, they might not actually be getting enough sleep with that kind of schedule, and for two, might not be getting school work done. I imagine theres more to the story, and probably some denial going on there about having bad habits.
@@Rhaenarys or the mom is just psycho, especially if her response is to beat her smart kid’s ass?
@@McSnezzly I also wonder about how exaggerated that claim is. It's a common phrase for getting a spanking. Or even just getting in trouble. You can agree or disagree about whether spanking is right or not. You also missed the point. He didnt get his "ass whooped" because hes a smart kid who got up early. Which...is funny how you assert his intelligence when it was never even mentioned. How DO you know hes a smart kid? Ever think maybe slacking in his grades might be the problem? Doubt it. Because I imagine you're also like many critics who damn a parent for doing something...and then damn them when they dont. But back to WHY he got in trouble, it was for disobeying the rules for one, and for two, being a smartass. Most kids who are smart asses to their parents generally dont get away with it Scott free. Why? Because its disrespectful. And part of parenting is teaching respect. Respect is earned, sure. But I wouldnt doubt you would be calling her a bad mom if she didnt teach respect to her kid. Which again, damned if you, damned if you dont.
Excuse me for hearing exaggerations from a kid who hasnt yet grown up, having been there, done that, myself, and so have many others who arent sharing your pov.
@@McSnezzly I mean...by your logic, I and many other parents in my situation would be considered "psychos" in your pov because of how our kids exaggerated getting in trouble, and how well they're doing in school even though they're not actually putting the effort in. I would be a rich woman if I got a penny for every time my kids tried to claim they WERE on track, and how they ARE doing their schoolwork...during school hours. So excuse me for seeing the half truths for what they more than likely are, having experience with this kind of situation. Oh...and I'm SOOO mean for taking phones away and tv time when I see they arent doing their school work. Lol for real. Sounds like you got some growing up yourself to do.
"I was expecting a doctor's note or something" Why would you need a doctor's note to pee like a normal person?
And how exactly does that prove he was relieving himself at the time?
*"OP must relieve himself every 2-3 hours every day due to drinking water. Signed, Dr. Doctor"*
@@moviehermit5631 i know right?
@Pyro It's uh... grammar and it's not likely they could fake it unless they had a pen and paper.
@@tiktik1531
More than "grammer" needs to be corrected.
@Sporecat Insectivore so that’s what you do when you need to edit grammar. I just edit it and don’t explain.
Fun fact
My urologist says people should be peeing like every 3 hours, so stopping every 1-2 hours makes sense
Tmi but now I drink the amount of water I should be, I'd say that's about right.
Going all day without going is not all that healthy
@@vintagecameragirl Its not healthy at all to not go during the day. Brings your chances of kidney stones WAY UP and nobody wants to pass one of those.
@@rglover444 I've had them before, a side effect from eating to much protein after being a low protein vegetarian for 20 years before. Yeah... worst week of my life.
I drink a good amount of water and Gatorade a day. I piss the moment i feel like i have to. I one time was in a long car ride. We still had an hour to go and i had to piss badly. I held it till we got home and finally pissed. But it was to late by the next day i had a terrible UTI. My family is prone to them. I am too. I get them a few times a year. But lesson learned. Never hold it. Go if you have to.
@@MalonzeProductionsGaming Once I was on a car trip, had to go, and went in a bottle right there.
I don’t know why, but when Rslash said “why can’t people just let introverts be introverts?” I kinda teared up. I’ve never heard someone be so kind and understanding. Thanks Rslash
-an introvert
Same here
Thanks Rslash
-Introvert #2
Add another one to the list.
-introvert #3
Not even a name, a true introvert.
-Introvert #4
I personally dont remember too much trouble on that front as a kid... buuut i also have a pretty powerful Ace on my side so to speak.
Introvert #5, Thanks RSlash
introvert teacher here. What's even more stressful than a day with small children? An afternoon with other teachers planing lessons and preparing stuff. So what I do? I am super early at school. The school is quiet. Not even the janitor is there yet. I have time to prepare everything I need to do. But in silence. Just me, my thoughts and that big empty school. Best time of the day. My fellow teachers think I'm weird. I probably am. But I like it.
Not weird at all! You’re not the only one who gets to work early for that reason! Same thing with people who get out of bed an hour before the rest of their household.
Same here. I usually show up by 6:30 to get what I need done and am out the door right after the students
@@ginafitzgerald1985 night owl can confirm but the opposite. I go to bed later than everyone else in my household because I like that alone time. If you've ever heard of friends before not the TV show but at the actual having a friend then I always make sure to kick them out early enough so that I have time to unwind before I pass out at night.
You could also remember is easier
As an introverted night owl I can relate but with the opposite. I always manage to study more efficiently after my mom goes to sleep. I also have adhd and am on the autism spectrum, so during the day even if I'm home alone I can't focus as well as at night due to all the extra sensory inputs like noises from outside, changing lighting as well as having to keep track of time. At night outside is silent, the lighting is unchanging and I have no need to constantly look at the time in attempt to substitute for my nonexistent internal clock, because I know everything in my environment will be unchanging for at least 6 hours and have no need to make sure I walk the dog on time or don't scare when my mom gets home.
When people find out I mostly study at night they always find it weird, unhealthy or for some reason have the impression that it makes me lazy because I do other things while I'm awake during the day. I'm currently studying to retake my high school final exams in a few weeks (my exams were cancelled last year due to covid and so my final grades were based on class work which in my schooling system normally has no effect on final graduating grades and so I'd not pushed myself to get perfect grades for class assignments) and I study about 2 hours during the day but mostly do hobbies and stuff, you know stuff people usually do in the evenings between school/work and going to bed. But then when my mom goes to sleep around 10pm is when my studying starts, I always feel so good being so efficient but for some reason a lot of people think of it as laziness just because my daily schedule is different to theirs and I don't study/work during the hours most people do.
That last story reminds me of a little unintentional malicious compliance my half bro did. When he was younger, around 4 yrs old, he would wake up early about 5 am, them jump into bed with his parent; who naturally did not like being woke at 5 am. My mum finally sat him down and told him that he didn't need to wake them, he could go to the lounge and entertain himself until they woke up.
So he did. It was around Christmas time, he woke up early, went to the lounge and entertained himself. He watched a little tv, played with a couple of his toys, opened several gifts that were under the tree, and ate a plate of Christmas snacks my mum had made the day before. And he did not wake his parents doing any of that.
That last mom is literally just teaching her kid not to be self reliant or productive
Sleep at 9:00 wake up in 10:00
Mom: 🖒
Sleep at 9:00 wake up in 5:00
Mom: 🖕
@Wirza Channel NO!
@@rl3d2008 i reported it don't worry
Most extroverts don’t respect introverts like that. Good on you rslash. 👍
Identity theft is not a joke
One thing I don’t understand about that last story is why you would punish the kid for getting up early? Simply set out the work the night before and say he can’t play games until he’s done with schoolwork and you check it
His mother is a narcissist and loves punishing her children for stupid shit.
Source: That guy is one of my best friends.
That last story: homeschooling? Check forcing OP not to be awake when she isn't? Check
Controlling narcissist? Check
Hotel? Trivago.
Homeschooling. Fantastic parenting. Forcing you kids to not wake up early leading them to a lifetime of sloth. Criminal
Got away with it? I would not rather talk about... no. No.
Physical Abuse? Check
It's a lose lose situation for many homeschooled kids... if they're unlucky enough to have parents that are abusive they're stuck at home all day every day with them.
Me while listening: So you are THE extravert that keeps picking up introverts along the line and keep them huh? 😂😂😂
OP: *Gives cup of pee*
Cop: Wtf is this
OP: Nothing its just orange juice *wink*
On a serious note though, if your pee is orange you should consullt a doctor @Kyojurotwo 👀
➡️ livegirls19. com ⤵️
B.e.S.T f'u"l'l D.a.T.i.n.G h.o.T G.i.r.L's
-L-o-V-e-S-e-X---❤️😘
..👍
!💖🖤❤️今後は気をライブ配信の再編ありがとうです！この日のライブ配信は、かならりやばかったですね！１万人を超える人が見ていたもん（笑）やっぱり人参最高！まさかのカメラ切り忘れでやら1かしたのもドキドキでした,.
💖🖤在整個人類歷史上，強者，富人和具有狡猾特質的人捕食部落，氏族，城鎮，城市和鄉村中的弱者，無`'守和貧窮成員。然而，人類的生存意願迫使那些被拒絕，被剝奪或摧毀的基本需求的人們找到了一種生活方式，並繼續將其DNA融入不斷發展的人類社會。.
說到食物，不要以為那些被拒絕的人只吃垃圾。相反，他們學會了在被忽視的肉類和蔬菜中尋找營養。他們學會了清潔，切塊，調味和慢燉慢燉的野菜和肉類，在食品市場上被忽略的部分家用蔬菜和肉類，並且學會了使用芳香的木煙（如山核桃，山核桃和豆科灌木 來調味g食物煮的時候 1618761262
"I was expecting a doctor's note!"
A doctor's note. To pee.
A few of my jobs has required it a drnote
R/MalComp where users do “exactly” what they’re told to do
Taking things literally class- Take a seat
Don't touch anything! (floats)
@@rl3d2008 still touching the air so SHOOT EM
@@Adam17805 now they are not touching anything since they are dead. But the dead body is touching the ground-
@@rl3d2008 ah but they aren’t alive
Yes a corpse is touching ground
But the ghost isnt
Ghost is Obeying the law
The story of the kid waking up early, as long as my oldest doesn’t wake me up at 6am, I’m totally fine with them hanging out and playing before we have to get our day going. That was just some weird control issues on the moms part. Like doesn’t everyone like to just chill before the having to go to school/ work?
Yeah. Be like my big brother. He is literally a vampire. He wakes up in the afternoon and he sleeps in the morning!
If you are wondering why I have so many replies, that's because there is spam of adult sites in this comment. There is bots in this comment. I did not bot this comment, heck I don't bot the comment section.
@@doulyduvert8097 NO. NO.
@@leyderguzman9099 no. STOP!
@@rl3d2008 Why are there so many of these bots?!? I've gotten so many replies to comments on other videos like that too.
@@particularapricot819 i literally have no idea why are there so many BOTS! They have appeared 5 times already. And all of them wanted me to click a link that isn't even colored in blue.
Extroverts mostly can't understand how anyone could want to avoid being around other people. It's similar to people who can't understand why a person would go no-contact with their parents; they just can't wrap their heads around it because they need to have other people around a lot, or they absolutely love their parents.
@Golden Fang Ryu Shenron Thanks; I've lived it. I am an introvert and I did go NC with my 'rents.
In an introvert my best friend Is the most extraverted person I know it ever heard of, and he lets me be an introvert
I am an extrovert and my wife is an introvert. I have no problem with her just being who she is. I also protect her right to be so with others.
My best friend, of 33 years, is EXTREMELY extroverted, incredibly flamboyant, bubbly, bouncy, hyper, and endlessly energetic, never sitting for more than minutes at a time, and always on the move, while I am incredibly introverted, an avid bookworm, extremely laid back, usually very quiet unless with one of the rare few people who I know very well and am very comfortable around-I am actually somewhat boisterous, and love to laugh, so we will joke for hours at a time. We are nearly polar opposites, but that hasn't effected our friendship in all these years.
As someone who has moved over 15 times & helped others move at least that many times I am very aware of how crucial it is to pack the truck correctly, it wouldn't matter if it took an extra hour it would be well worth the price to have someone do it right. I have only hired movers once but it was great to not have to do all the heavy lifting myself.
The first story is like the scene in Dumb and Dumber. At least the cop didn't drink it.
Best Datting Click 🔽
livegirls19. com
在整個人類歷史上，強者，富人和具有狡猾特質的人捕食部落，氏族，城鎮，城市和鄉村中的弱者，無`'守和貧窮成員。然而，人類的生存意願迫使那些被拒絕，被剝奪或摧毀的基本需求的人們找到了一種生活方式，並繼續將其DNA融入不斷發展的人類社會。
說到食物，不要以為那些被拒絕的人只吃垃圾。相反，他們學會了在被忽視的肉類和蔬菜中尋找營養。他們學會了清潔，切塊，調味和慢燉慢燉的野菜和肉類，在食品市場上被忽略的部分家用蔬菜和肉類，並且學會了使用芳香的木煙（如山核桃，山核桃和豆科灌木
來調味食物煮的時候 1618800454
@@azharjohari638 no
The mom and the early waking is likely her beating her kid because she tried but failed all her life to get up early to be productive but couldn't. Punishing your child because they are better than you is the worst kind of parent.
"I thought the bottle of piss was a gun."
- every cop ever
I'm sad because I'm going back in full person to school and can't watch these videos during school anymore...
I am so sorry for you. Not a joke .
😢
Im sad because im going into online school and will watch these videos and not doing work leading to bad grades
Well you can...when you get home
Saaaaaame
Woke up at 8:00 AM today, Rslash video at 9:00... this is gonna be a great day.
That last story: I don’t think it’s a case of not wanting introverts to be introverts. I think the mom is one who thinks video gaming is bad/a waste of time, and/or is one who confuses the FIRST thing you do with your highest priority and felt like OP was getting up SO THAT there would be video game time. Silly and short sighted either way.
Agreed. Doesnt sound like it was malicious or controlling. It sounds like this was years ago when gaming and computer addiction was something parents were warned about. And...I wonder how late OP went to bed. Also wonder what OPs idea of sleeping in is lol.
B.e.S.T f'u"l'l D.a.T.i.n.G -L-o-V-e-S-e-X-----۞------------
livegirls19. com 》》 𝙊𝙣𝙡𝙮 𝘼𝙙𝙪𝙡𝙩 《《
!❤️ 在整個人類歷史上，強者，富人和具有狡猾特質的人捕食部落，氏族，城鎮，城市和鄉村中的弱者，無`'守和貧窮成員。然而，人類的生存意願迫使那些被拒絕，被剝奪或摧毀的基本需求的人們找到了一種生活方式，並繼續將其DNA融入不斷發展的人類社會。
說到食物，不要以為那些被拒絕的人只吃垃圾。相反，他們學會了在被忽視的肉類和蔬菜中尋找營養。他們學會了清潔，切塊，調味和慢燉慢燉的野菜和肉類，在食品市場上被忽略的部分家用蔬菜和肉類，並且學會了使用芳香的木煙（如山核桃，山核桃和豆科灌木
來調味食物煮的時候
1618793354
Nah, she's just a batshit crazy controlling narcissist lol
When my 2 brothers and I were young our dad would put us to bed every night at 8:30. Our mom worked as a waitress and got home about 11:00. Once we were asleep our dad would go to the neighborhood bar and have some beer. I, being the oldest, would wake up at about 6:00 AM. No matter how quiet I was it would always wake up dad. He would pitch a fit! I never thought to tell him that if I went to bed later I would sleep later. When I started high school I stayed up as late, in the summer, as I wanted to. Problem solved.
When I was a kid, my mom always told me I could wake up as early as I wanted.... As long as I was quiet till 7:00am and was ready to walk out the door by by 7:30. It was a WIN for all.
Thank you for narrating my story. I was the truck driver one lol
tbh with that last story, I'm pretty sure the only reason I can think of as to why the mom didn't want her kid to be on the computer then is because she wanted to be on the computer then.
I think this took place years ago when computer and gaming addiction was still a big deal to parents. I think it has more to do with that that trying to just be controlling.
In the mother’s defense, it’s possible she thought he was waking himself up early and depriving himself of sleep to play. Still should handled it better. But I get why she’s concerned
First story
Off duty, pissing around 🤣🤣🤣
"Some people out there are just really cool dudes"
- Rslash, 2021
We didn't use a moving company when we moved west about 2 years ago. Instead, we had the storage company ship most of our stuff out here. The rest we took in our van with ourselves and the pooch. We pulled over every few hours so the dog could relieve himself and stretch his legs... And we stayed at different pet-friendly motels each night.
When I was in high school, I'd get up an hour early to do daily quests in World of Warcraft.
Thankfully I had a computer in my room so nobody cared ^.^
Best Datting Click 🔽
livegirls19. com
在整個人類歷史上，強者，富人和具有狡猾特質的人捕食部落，氏族，城鎮，城市和鄉村中的弱者，無`'守和貧窮成員。然而，人類的生存意願迫使那些被拒絕，被剝奪或摧毀的基本需求的人們找到了一種生活方式，並繼續將其DNA融入不斷發展的人類社會。
說到食物，不要以為那些被拒絕的人只吃垃圾。相反，他們學會了在被忽視的肉類和蔬菜中尋找營養。他們學會了清潔，切塊，調味和慢燉慢燉的野菜和肉類，在食品市場上被忽略的部分家用蔬菜和肉類，並且學會了使用芳香的木煙（如山核桃，山核桃和豆科灌木
來調味食物煮的時候 1618822195
Story #2: Show of hands, who besides me is imagining Sara Paxton in a moving truck right now?
Story #4: I think the mom's problem had more to do with the game than with her kid waking up before sunrise.
Agreed about the last one. Doesnt sound like it's time they got up that was the issue, but the reason as to why. I also imagine theres more to the story, like homework not getting done, and staying up late to play games on the computer. I also wonder what OP considers sleeping in lol as I know some early birds think 8 is sleeping in lol.
I was actually thinking that the parent objected to the game in a more "video games cause mass shootings" sort of way, but your scenario works too.
I am homeschooled as well. I used to play video games before school, but my mother stopped that after a while because she said I was coming to school unfocused and wanted to get back on the game. Which, was true. So the story at 15:17 is really relatable, minus the malicious compliance.
I'm not homeschooled, but I used to do the same thing a lot growing up. I have three older siblings so whenever I wanted to play video games on the computer or PS2 they'd already be using it or kick me off, therefore the only time I could play was early in the morning. I'd get up at like 5 am and play for a couple of hours, and my parents never cared because I was always quiet and ready to go to school by 7:30
Not only does OP waking up early not harm anyone, but their mom basically forced OP to break a habit that is really good for them. OP’s mom made them get up later and now as an adult they want to sleep in all the time, but waking up earlier leaves you with more energy and can also make you just feel better in general. OP’s mom did a bad thing by making her child stop waking up at 6.
Now if she wants to wake OP up early for the first time... she would have to regret that she broke his habit.
"Waking up earlier leaves you with more energy"? No. No it does not. Waking up earlier means you get less sleep and have less energy.
@@wmdkitty Yes it does, you can literally look it up. Waking up earlier as in in terms of time, obviously adjusting when you go to bed as well
rSlash, the personal stories you add in run the gambit from pure wholesome to 'why did they do you like that?' and the movers tale was pure wholesome. 10/10, keep up the good work, you're appreciated .
Did anyone else instantly get reminded of the 'Tik tac, sir?' scene from Dumb and Dumber upon reading this video's title? 🤣🤣🤣
Sure did.
BRUH THE LAST ONE SUMS IT UP FOR ME
so my mom was trying to get me to wake up early for whatever reason I told her YOU HAVE TO WAKE UP WITH ME OR I WONT DO MY CHORE SHE NEVER REALLY TOLD ME THAT AGAIN!
this was 3-4 years ago
The first story of Dumb and Dumber; when Jim Carey's character peed in a beer bottle and then the officer pulled him over. When the officer demanded the "beer" Jim Carey handed it to him. The officer than took a sip. Lmao!!!!
What the hell?
I cringed hard at that
@@Retrenorium the movie Dumb and Dumber was back in the early 90s.
@@meghanmckenzie5273 Funnily enough, I assumed something like that to happen here.
"Regular pee breaks ? Sounds far-fetched to me." Overzealous cop being overzealous ...
For the last story. it wasnt the waking up early that was the issue. it was the having enough free time to play a games when he could be learning.
As I understand it, the kid willingly participated in his homeschooling at the proper start time. Who cares if you have some leisure time to wake up to before starting your responsibilities for the day? The (imo unfair) grounding was borderline as punishment, but the mother was flat-out wrong to physically assault the kid.
Given the story and that he's homeschooled, I think mom is a bit of a control freak.
@@pdorn1 you're right. but parents dont use logic.
@@ArcTracertruepath this isn’t a matter of parents being illogical. This is a matter of THIS particular parent being bat shit crazy.
If the kid is getting up early on their own, easily and it’s not impacting their day who the frick cares if they are up early gaming. I’d much rather my kids get up on their own, and early to boot and play games than have to drag them out of bed.
@@ericaschaidt8588 I think that's the point everyone is missing, just because OP is participating during the right school times doesnt mean they are doing good in school. When this happens, tutoring happens. As well as homework. I imagine theres more to the story than OP cared to admit.
15:53 Beating your child because they found a way to have fun without interrupting school is just sadism.
What you said about your moving story, It may not be a funny story but it sure is one that more people need to hear. That is the best definition of Human KIND.
Geez! It’s a Godsend when my kids wake up really and play quietly on their own, leaving me to rest peacefully. They’ll even let the dogs out and whatnot. Why would any sane parent be upset about that???
i watch these instead of paying attention in class
Priorities
I moved last year. Most of what I was taking was already packed up, and some boxes were heavy. The company I hired did a great job, and thankfully I wasn't moving far, just in town. They did it in even less time that expected. I thanked them and tipped. If you treat workers like human beings then things go well.
Independent movers; you need to be respectful of them. Four years ago, we sold our home & bought another one of similar size. Because we're not exactly spring chickens now, we hired a local moving company instead of doing it ourselves
My wife's sister recommended the movers they recently used. My wife reserved the same not taking in consideration our home was larger than theirs.
When the movers arrived (2), they said it would take an additional 6 hours to load & unload-best case scenario...Oops 😬 They managed to get a 3rd person (not scheduled for a Saturday move) to assist, not charging any extra. During the loading, the senior made comments about the 2 BBQ grills ($350+) I on my patio. While everything was being unloaded at our new home, I told the lead to leave one of the grills on the truck and it was his. I gave an additional $200 cash tip for the other 2 to split. I would love to have given bigger tips but was cash strapped at the time 😐
The ironic thing is OP would have become a lazy adult wanting to sleep in regardless. I used to wake up early as hell too, now I never want to wake up before 9:30 in the morning. At the earliest. And even then I still wanna sleep.
I can officially say this is the fastest I've ever watched a video. 2 minutes.
4 mins. Nice
5 minutes nice
Rookie number's
How... You watched a 16 minute long video in 2 minutes?
@Nqzz ? Nice
I thought that the first story was going in the direction of that one scene from "Dumb and Dumber"
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!💖🖤❤️今後は気をライブ配信の再編ありがとうです！この日のライブ配信は、かならりやばかったですね！１万人を超える人が見ていたもん（笑）やっぱり人参最高！まさかのカメラ切り忘れでやら1かしたのもドキドキでした,.
💖🖤在整個人類歷史上，強者，富人和具有狡猾特質的人捕食部落，氏族，城鎮，城市和鄉村中的弱者，無`'守和貧窮成員。然而，人類的生存意願迫使那些被拒絕，被剝奪或摧毀的基本需求的人們找到了一種生活方式，並繼續將其DNA融入不斷發展的人類社會。.
說到食物，不要以為那些被拒絕的人只吃垃圾。相反，他們學會了在被忽視的肉類和蔬菜中尋找營養。他們學會了清潔，切塊，調味和慢燉慢燉的野菜和肉類，在食品市場上被忽略的部分家用蔬菜和肉類，並且學會了使用芳香的木煙（如山核桃，山核桃和豆科灌木 來調味g食物煮的時候 1618807757
My dad was the exact same way as the mom in the last story. I would always get up around 5:45-6:15AM when I was around 12-14. He forced me to stop so "I would be sure to get adequate sleep", and now I have severe insomnia and waking up problems
Once upon a time our own mother banned us from waking up before 7 because we were watching and getting excited about Pokémon and she wanted to sleep.
Believe us personally when we say that what op's mother did there has NOTHING to do with op! By definition the only reason she banned a child from being a child is because she clearly doesn't think about how anyone lives but herself and CANNOT FATHOM that someone might have a reason to get up earlier than her. She doesn't care about her child or probably even know about them. She cares about herself
Must be a light sleeper.
Happy that I can come here everyday for the great content from the grand emperor of the internet
That vacuum cleaner story was EPICALLY sweet because who else would have done that???
OP truck driver deserves praises for keeping his pee bottles. There are literally hundreds of thousands of urine-filled bottles thrown away unceremoniously every year in the us
I’m glad my mom wasn’t like that. I had to share a bathroom with my sister growing up. She’s into makeup and hair done and all that, I’m not. So, I’m order to not fight with her in the morning I just woke up earlier to do my own thing. HOWEVER, I’m STILL scared about doing anything in the morning because I don’t want to wake anyone up.
Thats Cray Cray hunny
The guy with the pee bottle was actually the sniper from TF2
Lol that last story, though. Mom was basically angry that her kid was TOO efficient and could adhere to routines.
Mom told me this one; when she was prego with me she put her urine sample in a clean whiskey bottle then stopped at the Pharmacy only to return and some kind soul had stolen her sample.
Anyone else picture the scene from the Dumb and Dumber movie. Lol. Minus the scene where he drinks the contents of the bottle.
Dude! Same! Ha ha ha!
I did too, it was the first thing that came into my mind
also this cop expected a doctor’s note for peeing every 2-3 hours???? that is so normal???? is this person such an incredibly sour being that they only piss like once a day???
Yeah, thats pretty ridiculous. I'm not a truck driver, but I'm a type 2 diabetic who is not very "with the program" mainly because I have other stuff going on with me thats more of a concern so I kinda don't care that much right now, but bottom line because of that I have to pee frequently. Who the hell thinks to get a doctor's note for that. Maybe if you're working in a warehouse or something, but on the road in a truck where you're operating independently with very little supervision over every minute of every shift? Weird.
@@Nekulturny yea that piss story made me angry. I've held plenty of jobs, including retail, warehousing, and pizza delivery.
The only time people have wanted me to provide a doctor's note for using the restroom were school. That's it. Worked for Amazon and I was free to pee whenever I needed, and in actual toilets! Delivering pizza and retail I could use the restroom if I wasn't busy. (Minus cashiering, but I didn't need a doc note, just needed someone to cover, which was annoying in its own right)
Tldr: No job I have held attempted to control my bladder, or demand I get their permission to use the restroom.
Wait, is that not normal
First story: so did i understand correctly, that guy had more that one bottle of piss with him. That doesn't paint very clean picture of him.
That last story...
She should be punished either through legal or physical action. And i say that from the heart.
Not gonna go on in details or start a rant but the ass kicking at home stopped when i started punching back.
Having kids should require a license like driving a car.
I as an introvert always had that problem as a kid. Iam the type of person wear if I don't have my alone time I get very agitated, annoyed and short-tempered with people.
So do I, although sometimes I try my best not to show my displeasure whenever someone interrupts my "alone" time and just go with whatever they want.
Starting my morning with coffee and rSlash is the best 🥰
Sweet mother Mary this is the earliest I've been. So hi Rslash!
Speaking on introverts. When the isolation requirement hit- so did my mental health. For the first time I understood what introverts feel when they’re forced to go out. Because being forced to stay away from people absolutely sucked.
cop: so you're taking time off for a minute why?
OP: (clears throat) *hm* hold my piss
OP in the last story was waking up his mother when he got up.
I know, because I was the same way when I was a kid. I would wake up early, and with the bathroom on the first floor I had to walk past my parents bedroom to get to the restroom. Well, squeaky floor would wake my mother, so she would rant and rave that she didn't want me walking past to wake her up in the morning. Eventually I got sick of her bitching at me for waking up so early, so I started pissing out the bedroom window and it ruined her rose bed.
This lasted for months before we finally got a second bathroom in the house so I didn't have to walk past her bedroom and break her oh so precious beauty sleep.
Still to this stay day almost three decades later she refuses to understand why I ruined her roses.
I thought you were gonna say you peed outside her bedroom door
Should have found some convoluted plan to get the pee into her bed without noticing and then pulling an uno reverse by turning that into an argument why peeing has priority over sleeping, nobody wants to wet their bed.
When he handed the bottles to the cop my mind went to the scene from Dumb & Dumber where the cop pulls them over and asks for the bottle and drinks from it 🤢🤮 lol
How is being an introvert relevant to a story about waking up early? I'm an introvert and I have never been a morning person
I was wondering that too. I'm the same. Introvert.. but NOT a morning person.
I love reading rslash at school and then listening to the same story’s when I’m doing homework at home he just really brings light to it and makes them more entertaining
Being an ex military spouse, we moved a lot. The first move was over seas. The move caused 2 of the 3 neon beer signs I had broken. These were irreplaceable so while we were paid for replacing them we were still out the signs. The third sign broke one the return move. She was a combat photographer and had two Video cameras, a Cannon 35mm film camera with assorted lenses a six month old Mac desk top, a Mac lap top, a Nintendo 64, wii, PlayStation, Xbox, Xbox 360, all didn’t make it to the destination. We used one of the video cameras to record all of these high dollar items but without the camera to play back the tape (the movers left the tape but took the camera) and no computer to download the footage, we had no proof the video camera or lap top was missing. These two items were not on the manifest. But we also had great movers. Who painstakingly wrapped all our fragile items and keepsakes to insure they would make it to our new homes safe. Always be nice to the people who pack and move your belongings. They have a hard job.
God that mom sounds crazy
Same boat rSlash, I'm the extrovert in my group of introverts too.
Without us, they wouldn't get the necessary Vitamin D and fresh air our bodies need, lol
So you adopted a bunch of introverts, good on you lol
"I'm sure I'm not the only over the road truck driver who's done this, it's very common."
Ok, but that's worse...you do get why that's worse, right?
Tbh the vacuum story was the best 😂
Yeah me and my family always try to help out anyone whenever we're either at strangers house or we're having people move in to our rentals my dad manages.
when you meet a genuine nice person sometimes it feels like "ight wheres the cameras this is a hidden cam show right?" but nah some people just chill an nice love hearing stories of nice people :3
When I was a teenager I used to wake up early on saturdays to play games. Sometimes as early as 4:00 am. In the summers I would wake up early to play as well (we weren't allowed to play computer on school days - thanks to a semester of low grades from yours truly). To this day (well over 20 years later) my body still wakes up at 6:00. and I find it hard to sleep in.
Choked on my vape when he said the piss was still warm. Hah!
That last story reminds me of my own mother. To her, Sunday was the "computer's day of rest"....Now mind you she is not religious and didn't follow it herself, she just didn't want me to enjoy myself during my free time. Didn't matter if I finished all my schoolwork, didn't matter if it was pouring outside and there was nothing else to do. Pointless overbearing rules that definitely contributed to me being quite the problem child
If you don't want your kid to be playing games before school,then take away the computer or tell them to do something more productive like making their bed, making breakfast, take a shower or read a book or something. If they don't do what they're told, then you punish them for DISOBEYING YOUR INSTRUCTIONS AND NOT DOING SOMETHING PRODUCTIVE, but don't punish them for waking up early to be on time for class !! Come on now...
Almost like this scene form "dumb and dumber"
Before I finally got a role as engineer, yes I am not your typical engineer and spent half my career as a grunt, I learned to relieve my self in bottles any way I could. This included working 18hrs in the basket of snubbing units or while driving down the highway.
I feel bad for the first guy, he was just doing his job.
Three cheers for letting introverts be introverts.
I, an introvert, was between housing a few years ago. My sister and brother-in-law, both extroverts, let me stay with them for a while. This difference in traits caused some confusion and hard feelings when I first moved there.
At the time, I worked at a job that I loved but which also required me to interact with lots of people during the day. I would get home exhausted from all of these social activities. I would get home, go to my room and just sit quietly to recover for a while. My sister, and BIL, on the other hand, would get home from their jobs looking to talk to me (they got home at different times, both after I did), in part because that is how they recharge, and in part because they thought this was the way to make me feel at home. Sometimes I would try to talk to them, sometimes I would say 'be down in a few minutes'. Either way, they thought I was angry at them or not liking it there, etc.
Finally, I explained to them. I am an introvert. I interact with humans all day. I am exhausted and need alone time before I can function again. You are extroverts, you need interaction function well. I promise if you give me a bit of alone time I will come down and interact with you fully for the rest of the evening. Once my family understood what was going on, they gave me my space and we spent many good evenings together.
I read a book for introverts that argues we should NOT treat others as we would have them treat us, but instead to treat others as they would like to be treated. That, is very good advice.
me a german student: wait you don't have to wake up at 6 to go to school?
I wake up at 4, and I've been doing that for about 2 years now, when I first started my mom and my older sister was pissed until they found out I was exercising for a few hours before school
Makes me feel good about my recent move. From storage unit to house, everything boxed up. I greeted the guys with donuts, I didn't know if tipping was expected, so at the end, I gave the foreman a $20 to buy sandwiches for them at a nearby deli.
Ah yes, it's always an amazing day when r/Slash uploads a malicious compliance video :D
That cop really was pissed off. He got exactly what he asked for, though.
When my family was moving we told some friends of ours, and ma said she was making ribs for dinner that night. We had at least five men built like linebackers. Ma and I didn't have to move anything heavy, and mostly supervised.
the best bait ever
With the last story, why wouldn't you want your kid to be a morning person in a society that gives morning people a big advantage.
My parents still think I should’ve been an extrovert and blame my verbally-abusive grandmother for why I became an introvert. Thing is, it wasn’t just her, it was the bullying I got at school and my hatred of teachers putting us in situations where we were forced to socialize with people who we could already tell didn’t like us (at our school, first impressions were everything with little in the way of second chances for closer friendships)
One thing I learned when doing remodeling for a living. When it comes to how long the job will take, use the movers for instance, the job should take 2 hours, tell the customer hopefully 2 hours or less but it could take 3 hours tops. And when it over if it only takes 2½ hours just charge them for the 2½ hours instead of 3. Only once has it ever let me down and it wasn't my fault.