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Oh no it’s me, I’m Jane 🫣

And now I come to the end of my binge of the saga. My heart is heavy and aching with all these conflicting emotions, which is nothing to what you've been feeling for a decade considering I only just started to learn about it. I know this means absolutely nothing and might even be a little weird coming from a stranger, but I'm so proud of you for showing vulnerability and letting yourself feel things for something you clearly still care so much about, and that you keep trying interesting creative things no matter what comes your way. I definitely cried more than a couple times going through this. Thank you for sharing your story, and for spotlighting the real people who made this happen. Thank you for sharing your incredible talents and skill with all of us. Thank you for over a decade of making me feel like I have a home and that some things are worth loving no matter how difficult it can be. I might go cry a bit more, but now I'm going to dig into your other content.

Flames. Flames on the sides of my face.

I only discovered the Lizzie Bennett Diaries maybe two years ago because of an overview by Karolina Żebrowska of various adaptations of P&P. I first read the book, then started watching the 1995 adaptation. It was part way through watching the 1995 miniseries that I then started watching the Lizzie Bennet Diaries. I went on to also watch the 1940 and 2005 adaptations before I even finished the Lizzie Bennet Diaries. I made sure to watch the related CZcams channels e.g. the Lydia channel, while doing all that.

🥹 We *do* love her like you love her. And for me, that's why I was so excited y'all liked the plushies: because people that had done work that I really admired liked the work I had done. I am very upset to hear the "Hank never should have said..." because compensatung the cast and crew was absolutely a reason I donated at the level I did.

I had no idea that Netherfield was also filmed at Jenni's apartment, and I agree Christopher is super nice. My family and I had a chance to meet him on the floor at Star Wars Celebration in Anaheim in May 2022, and he was so sweet to my kids. I of course recognized him from LBD, but I also knew he was a was a lead voice actor in Star Wars Resistance. It is my favorite photo I was able to take that weekend.

Finding out the comments Lydia listed off were written before those episodes even aired was mind-blowing. Because a lot of the comments really were like that. Watching it was heart-wrenching. And if I remember right, it was a pivot point in the comments section. Like the anti-Lydia people had either been won over or shamed into silence.

I've been so excited to get to this part of the look back. I vividly remember how it felt at the time, seeing Charlotte's frantic tweets and the link to the website before the episode dropped. Like Jay, I was absolutely horrified the first time I saw the site. For a bit, it honestly made me forget that it was a story. I also kept anxiously checking and rechecking the website. I refused to email on principle, but my heart sank more and more each day, no clue how it was going to end, until finally, right before that later episode came out, and I clicked on the link and the countdown timer and everything was gone. I may have actually cried lol

When y'all came to Leaky Con 2013 in Portland, Allison hadn't been announced with everyone else. So I'd had those plushies made of everyone there but her. I felt bad that she was the only one who didn't get a plushie of herself, so I went home to where I was staying that night and stayed up late making a Gigi doll to give the next day of con. All of you were so lovely about it <3

I had no idea about the app, glad that got to hear about it over here itself; definitely not downloading anything coming from BS. Also, wow, Look Back Diaries is 2 years old!! Thanks Ashley for doing it and sharing the LBD transmedia stuff, now that's a worthy download!! ❤

One thing I will say, you posited we don't actually have proof of Lydia doing anything wrong. But while it still doesn't warrant all of how Lizzie treats her, Lydia has, in more than one of her videos, made some really bad choices. She steals prescription meds at her babysitting jobs, which is dangerous and illegal. She brings a strange guy into Mary's house to live in her attic without telling anyone. When she's feeling neglected, she ditches everyone without a word and all of her responsibilities to drive out and see Jane. She definitely has problems with emotional regulation and doesn't think her choices through.

why is one part muted??

"A resounding shrug." I'll have to remember that one. Very nicely put.

how do you both still look the same still?! fountain of youth?

I backed that kickstarter and I remember being so annoyed how all the kickstarter was handled and I didn’t even know all the behind the scene stuff.

i love the transmedia aspect of LBD and think it's important to preserve that but I do think there's a level of irony to the app's existence when LBD was originally meant to be a show of /youtube's/capability as a storytelling platform lol

I’m living for the super honest Ashley / Look Back tea era 😂👏🏻

I think the fact that you weren't able to pursue your sequel to the LBD series with the script, honestly told me everything I needed to know. This project, honestly brought me a sense of community, especially for not only a character but a story that I loved and saw that others loved or enjoyed it as much or even more. It definitely opened up the door for people to be exposed to it, that otherwise would have never read or seen the other adaptions.

I own LBD on dvd 😂 loved this series. Been a Nerdfighter from the jump and the amount of affiliated content I have consumed over the years is staggering. And wonderful

Ran here from your Instagram and saw the community post on LBD's channel... yikes. I'm so sorry Ashley. The cast and crew of LBD are amazing, passionate, and have been keeping the fandom alive for YEARS. Those greedy execs can go eat stale honey almond shrimp.

Thanks for letting us know about the app. Thankfully, I don't need a silly app, I have the Look Back Diaries!

Thanks Ashley and Brendan for illuminating the incredible challenges you both experienced just trying to get what you both were due for your amazing work! It’s utter bulls**t that creatives including actors, writers etc struggle to get paid a decent wage!

Very Relatable Introvert = Socially Awkward Darcy™️

Does anyone know how book deals work because I'm wondering now - given everything that's come out about a certain showrunner - whether Rachel and Kate were fairly compensated for writing the Lydia book?

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My short paperbacks are organised by author, but I own both the lizzie book and the lydia book. Props to past me for wanting to place them together so I just filed them both under Kate Rorick's name - f this BS

Thank you for answering the LBD bat call and giving your perspective! And importantly also happy 2 year anniversary of the start of the Look Back Diaries!! 🥳

I already really like you as an actress (discovered you from Charlotte Brontë!) and this is just fueling that (along with my fury at your horrible treatment). Also, love how you pronounced my name correctly! I'm not the Camille from the video but it's incredibly refreshing to hear it said the right way.

"Please advise" is a properly hilarious way to end that email

Wearing a little vest, or waistcoat, as a woman is a classic piece that has come back in a couple iterations throughout history! Even back in the 1800s, some dresses were made to look like you had a vest on as part of the bodice. Then when women started wearing trousers in the mid-ish 1900s, they popped up again. Back in the 2012's and now again in 2024 they're starting to gain popularity again (I say this because some brands have started selling some again). I've always loved wearing one, and after getting into cosplay and wearing corsets, have realized it's kind of just a non-cinching corset. Snug, keeps things in, smooths you out. I have to dress very business-y for work (no suit jacket/tie, but just down from that) and I am always reaching for my vests, especially in the summer when I don't want to wear a full blazer but still want the dressy affect. Also they're a great way to dress up collared shirts that may be considered a little more casual (material or fit-wise). I have like 5 or 6 different vests in my closet and am rotating through them frequently. But my work-wear has always toed the line between feminine and masculine because working in stem i just have never wanted to stand out tooooooo much.

On the bright side, almost every single app published is a failure. It’s very hard to make an app that people will use en masse and I don’t think this idea is going to be the next thing to take off. 😂

I think some of the inconsistencies/imperfections from not having a monitor is what made it feel so real, and was a reality that the later series lacked. I could truly believe Lizzie was a real person and didn’t have to suspend much belief that the things we saw on camera could go down that way. I never could quite believe that with the other series, even though (or maybe because) they seemed to have a higher budget.

I hope this backfires because all the comments are talking about the look back diaries. That's how I found you. I never knew this was a thing and hadn't thought of LBD in a while, but I just binge watched all of your LBD in a couple days.

This is all just so frustrating and sad. The injustice of it all makes me furious. Thank you for being so open with us. ♥︎

This is the first time I’m hearing about the Look Back Diaries, and I’m really angry. Both about that, and the fact that I’m only learning about how shitty Bernie Su has acted **after** I downloaded the LBD app.

Okay, full confession, I did not watch the epilogue episodes when Lookback Diaries was initially happening. Coming back to watch them now after watching your video about the new app, and damn, this is some major drama.

O.O I just started watching these while working on a project, and I looked up and saw my plushie in the corner. 🥹 I'm so happy a few of y'all liked them enough to keep them.

"don't download the app.." took me back to "please don't visit that website"

I used to be obsessed with TLBD back in the day but I haven't been following the news about this. I innocently downloaded the app but thankfully someone sent me this and now I have deleted my account and deleted the app as well! Always happy to support talented people like you

It so sad to learn about the behind the scenes of LDB. I love rematching the CZcams vids. I just watched the whole about the app. I will NOT be downloading it.

Damn…

Just found this because I heard about the app 🙄 So first I will say, I was the producer and I was the one who had to re-edit the episodes so I can provide some info. Ashley is correct, I barely knew what I was doing. I was also only paid $3,000 flat for everything I did on the dvd box set over a period of about 9 months - producing, directing, interviews, editing, writing, translating, contracts, other KS fulfillments, and random things Bernie requested way outside the original job description. I was told I would have support and guidance, but I ended up on my own and was scared to quit because I didn’t want Bernie blackballing me (he also told me there would be a bonus when I finished - that never appeared). I was young, wanted to pay my dues and learn/grow, and let myself get walked over and used. It was one of the worst working experiences of my life because of Bernie. As for the files - the DVD manufacturers wouldn’t accept the downloaded files off CZcams because of compression issues. Hank or whoever originally edited didn’t save almost any of the episode files in any format. They also didn’t keep the raw files organized. Because the budget for an editor was $750 already spent (already nowhere near enough for the work we were given) I had to do it. I was given many TBs of unorganized raw footage, and had to re-cut EVERY episode by watching the YT ep and matching with the raw video and audio files. I did almost the entire box set by myself (which is why there are mistakes, literally no one else even bothered to look at them. Bernie refused, so I was QCing the whole project alone on xmas eve). Bernie wouldn’t let me post anything to give realistic updates to KS backers or even tell people I was just doing literally everything by myself (plus some unpaid volunteers that Bernie got) so I was stuck for months completely broke and feeling trapped trying to finish it and feeling horrible for literally everyone involved. Ashley and the entire cast were lovely and patient through the whole nightmare and I’m still sorry for any way I contributed to a bad experience for cast or fans. There was a lot more but I just wanted to back up Ashley and provide context (and maybe get some of this off my chest finally lol)

All that needs to be said!

Insane that when I originally watched the series I was barely a teenager and now I'm in the "young women in their 20s" bracket! I couldn't imagine finishing Secondary school ever ending, let alone doing a PhD like I am now 😳

Thank you for clarifying and pointing us to the Look Back Diaries. I saw that you were making them but haven't watched yet! I've been a fan since the second you showed up on my screen as Lizzie Bennet, and it pisses me off that you haven't been compensated for your work/likeness appropriately. I unfollowed that "genius creator" a while ago after he seemed to go all in on AI but had no idea that he was using this thing you all helped create to bolster his own platform. Definitely going to give the Look Back Diaries a watch

The way I said "this is an experiment" out loud while watching this at exactly the same time as you lol. THE PRECEDENT. Anyway, it's a shame, 'cause something compiling (most of) the transmedia experience in a linear presentation, once it's already played out in real time, is actually a neat idea. I DID download the app when it was announced and IMHO the amount of personal info and permissions it asks for is a dealbreaker in and of itself, on top of everything else.

He was on a podcast I really enjoy and thought I could listen to the episode. Maybe hear his side but one minute in, I felt so sick and repulsed just by his intro that I turned it off. I would rather rewatch the Look Back Diaries. I don't think you are dead inside. I think we have our emotional limits. You already hit your limit with him and this situation so your lack of reaction just shows you can't get more upset when hearing more information that confirms your feelings. Or at least that is how I see it. Only you know or can figure that out for yourself. I just want to say I don't find those comments an indication that you are dead inside.

Well, I'm watching the Look Back Diaries again that's for sure.

I might be the _only_ person to have come to the Lizzie Bennet Diaries from Lydia's videos... I had no idea what i was watching but i LOVED it and was so sure I'd hate this older sister, Lizzie, who kept getting mentioned. How wrong I was 😅