Hoarder Mom Is A Terrible Person
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- čas přidán 6. 04. 2024
- Hoarder Mom has yelled at her family so much they dont even respond to her anymore.
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8:21 The way Eileen spoke to her youngest son broke my heart after he literally came to her with a compromise “can we like donate two of these and keep one?” and like Ken said to think that she’s probably worse than that to her family off camera yeah I’m mad
Without something changing that kid may very well learn that compromise is a bad thing, that how you get what you want is by aggression and force then boom we have another douche canoe misadjusted man out there
Okay. At the beginning I was going to start with the "why don't they help her" but
....yeah.
Exactly! He is more mature than her.
I see another potential Ruby Franke here
is it weird that she has the name of a serial killer?
This is child abuse. Think of the kids when they get older and think back to their childhood "safe space". The parents are unknowingly making more hoarders.
No they're not. I am a clean freak. My Mom and Stepdad would not LET me clean it out (I would spend hours cleaning, and the moment I stopped he would drag it RIGHT back in for her, and I would get screamed at). I had to move back into it after University due to a really bad car accident. They passed. The day we took step father off life support I got a notice (town had found out how it looked INSIDE) that I had two weeks to clean the place out. I can barely walk. I got a friend in. So far we have gotten rid of over 750 more 30 gallon bags of parental STUFF. Before that about 150 and a hauler truck that I had hired. Our DUST bunnies had FANGS. They are dead now along with the 100+ mouse infestation I tried for a couple of decades to get rid of. They ate her closet...and got into mine. HUGE old Victorian home. 9 rooms, 2 baths, full basement, full CEDAR LINED attic. My closet and the one in the Master bedroom also are CEDAR LINED. TOTAL fixer upper. But NOW being fixed! Even getting wood cabinets made by the roommate. I am not as able as I was but in my head I am beyond clean freak. When I could I color coordinated my SOCKS. (University, put myself in at 18). Yes, YES I tried really hard to get OUT of this. Laughs. I am writing a horror story. Hoarder home. Have to get something good out of this! Mom was a total clean freak. We had moved in in 1978. 1980 father suddenly died. He was doing repairs on the house around a full time job. LAST real repairs ever done. Step Father did ZERO and everything became her 'memories'. Had to live in it from 12 until 18, getting worse all the time. Took myself out to University. Six months after graduating from said PRIVATE expensive university I was crippled in a car wreck. Managed not to come home for three years. Then had no choice. Saga. Drama. FOUR years now but it is ALMOST all clean. And omg getting fixed!
@@ekramer2478I was almost a hoarder because of my grandmother. It can happen if the mess is managed enough and seen as normal for a kid. I stopped as a teen when I realised I was spending so much money on little knick knacks and holding onto random shit I could craft with (I'm an artsy fellow.)
I don’t think that makes hoarders???? Those parents have a mental illness. The kids could grow up to be amazing people. That was an uneducated ignorant statement.
Hi there, my fatheris a hoarder and I developed severe cleaning ocd.
@@ekramer2478I also have major condolences for both your parents, your injury and the mess left behind. My grandma is getting to the age of "just died in her sleep" and absolutely none of the family is excited to empty out her should-be-condemned house. The hoard has broken floors, walls, ceilings... there is no bathroom because the termites ate the floor up so badly everything but the tub had to be removed. It is literally a pit and my poor brother and uncle are stuck out there and have to take showers at my house. I'd do anything to get the boys out of there but I have no money myself. It's a nightmare. I'm so so so sorry you're going through this troubling situation.
Everyone is okay with it because, she has wore all of them down. Ken is right: She wants everything done her way.
Exactly your 💯percent correct.
It really is about control.
They put their stuff somewhere, they now control that space. Their stuff, their space, their rules. And they just keep accumulating things so that they have more control over a space because likely they have no control over the rest of their life.
And they're conscious of it, they pretend they're not but this is exactly why they do it.
Done her way, but even she doesn't kniw what her way is aside from not doing anything.
Hoarding is all about control.
Emotional manipulation at its finest.
Dad is spineless and needs to rent an apartment so he doesn't lose his kids
Thank f someone said it...he stayed with her! He let those kids stay in that disgusting trash pit.
I love how the little kid was like "how about we donate these and maybe keep one" that's usually what the adult is supposed to do with the kid about their toys or whatever that's how you know this is fucked shows the little kid is probably a bit more mature than his own mom
The way she reacted to the small kid was also hitler level evil
yeah the kids probably have to grow up and be adults fast because their mother is a literal child
Steven raised him well.
As a recovered hoarder, when you try to start but see no end; you automatically give up because “what’s the point”. But also as a recovered hoarder, you need to WANT the help
I come from a family with some hoarding issues. If they cling to their stuff too hard and can't be reasoned with, there's no change that will happen. You need to have rules on what you can and can't keep and stick yourself to it. Like I havenore more than one basket per hobby, and they have to fit on a shelf.
Congrats on getting out of it
It sounds exactly like all other addictions--you have to WANT help. Also, super well done on your recovery
There's also an aspect of pride in there too pretty often (whether we realize it or not). The want for help has to weigh more than the embarrassment of your situation.
Proud of you for dealing with that! I understand how hard it can be
My mother acts exactly like her minus the hoarding aspect and it is so validating to hear you calling her a bad mother. Thank you. The verbal abuse gets exhausting after an entire life's worth of it
My father does this aswell, at some point I blanked him out
@@katielove8874 I'm sorry. It's so hard. I hope you're doing alright. It still hurts but yeah I definitely have had to just stop listening to the words since they're always insulting or threatening
My mother is exactly the same with the hoarding problem included. I know she has always had that problem and many others, but she rather blame everyone else, including me, than take responsibility and try to solve them.
@@leslygutierrez1992 It's so insanely frustrating having to constantly deal with that kind of behavior. It's so unfair. I hope you're doing alright
My father is the same, and after me and all the siblings moved out, now he desperately jumps at any chance that we would move back into the parents' house. These types just want someone to control nearby, it sucks but you just have to put distance between yourself and them when you can. My mother's a free spirit and took to basically leaving the house all the time to go hiking and do other activities that she loves but my father finds no joy in once the nest was empty. I almost feel bad for him. Almost.
These hoarders on this show always blow my mind, some of them have literal feces they won’t throw away
That’s good fertilizer for the garden. Don’t throw that away!
It’s a house for germs! You can’t throw away a useful home!
@@razorburn7745not when they keep it inside their house for years
@@razorburn7745lol what garden? Their stuff is usually dead 😂(ik you’re joking)
I hope it rains got me
As someone with parents like these two, I wouldn't call the dad useless. I'd call him broken. Tired, broken, and defeated. That woman has probably manipulated and beaten him down both mentally and emotionally to the point he doesn't have the energy to fight back. It's not good, mind you, but calling him useless is ignoring that he's likely been abused by that woman even longer than his kids.
I agree. He's been abused too, no doubt. It's one of those things where everyone always asks why they didn't do anything, but yeah like you said, he's probably too broken to do anything and it's so sad
I just have issue with present parents who allow another parent to abuse THEIR children. Someone has to stand up for the kids. When women leave abusive men it’s strength. To see that man allow his kids to live like that is shameful!!!
This is true, there are just as many female abusers as male in this world 😢 I feel so bad for the father and children
The dad is a victim as much as the children. I lived in a DV situation for 27 years. Trust me when I say that man has had his soul crushed and can no longer tell the difference between normal and "his normal" I protected my kids from their father for as long as I could. Eventually they get old enough to see things as they are. They stopped believing all my lies and factious explanations. In the end it was my two daughters who forced me to look at reality. When abuse goes on for that long the victim genuinely does not see it anymore. It is incredibly sad to admit, but it took my teen age daughter's relentlessness to make me realize how bad things were, and that I could not keep making excuses. They insisted I leave him. They were the ones who put the ball in motion. THEY saved me because I genuinely did not know how to safe myself. It's been three years and looking back I cannot believe the things I allowed to happen. But, just like the dad in this episode, sometimes the only way to survive an abuser is to completely disassociate. This dad could be the poster child for disassociating!!
She's definitely gonna end up in a nursing home, wondering why she's alone. And it'll be completely her fault.
I remember as a kid being told I was ungrateful everytime I stood up for myself against adults. It feels much better now seeing other people point out how horrible it is when guardians hold the bare minimum over a kids head for complete obedience. When they’re required by law to provide, not out of the goodness of their heart
"A child doesn't ask to be born." You're so right about parenting being what you do beyond the fking basics.
As someone who grew up in a hoarder home.... it's awful. The person doesn't see it as a problem, you stink cause you don't know you smell, and clothes don't get cleaned as much. Those children need to get out.
Yes and she isn't teaching those kids how to take care of themselves when they are older cause she doesn't even take care of herself
yep plus all the kids at school wonder why you go to their house but can never come to yours. you feel like you have a deep dark secret and it brings so much shame. i hope these kids have a clean home one day.
@@camdecay Exactly 👏👏
This woman was so awful. I hope her sons have grown up and left her behind to do better things.
Wish I could see her cry when they all leave.
I hope it’s fake 🥲
The dad needs to step up and grow a spine, too.
@@sydneysovern I doubt it is unfortunately.
@@ekramer2478 me too 😭
“I’ll just do it myself!”
Continues to not do it herself….
Bravo. 👌🏼💯
My mom: Get out of here. You make me sick. I am so sick and tired of having to point out the obvious to you. Go away.
My mom 3.5 seconds later: **HOW DARE YOU ALL SIT ON YOUR BUTTS NO ONE IS GELPIBG EME!!!!**
Watching these shows always make me feel better about my own house. I’m disabled and live with chronic pain so it’s harder for me to do housework but I do get it done just slower. It’s never ever even close to this!
It's similar for me. 20+ years of living with depression, anxiety & insomnia makes me have very little energy for housework. It's a bit messy here, but it's not dirty. I make sure to clean the most important parts at least once a week - like the bathroom and properly cleaning all kitchen surfaces.
I also have a bit of a problem throwing out old things, but occasionally I do it regardless. Like a few weeks back I threw out some old shoes that had been in a box under my bed for maybe 2 years. Their soles were thinned out or broken in places or the fabric ripped, but in my mind they were "too good to throw out". I could've still worn them.. but after 2 years under my bed I thought I'll never wear them again so I threw them out and it actually felt freeing somehow.
So yeah, I do somewhat understand that hoarder mindset, but it's faaar from as bad at these people have it. I'm planning on doing some spring cleaning soon, finally throwing out some random stuff that have spent some years in boxes. Maybe I'll take pictures of some things beforehand as a compromise. So the things aren't completely forgotten.
Hell, I don’t even have any physical disabilities, just slow to clean my apartment generally but i don’t know how anyone could let it get to the point where they can’t even walk around or guests can’t breathe with their noses.
As long as you find the time to do every now and again, there’s no need to feel bad about having a slightly messy house :)
I’m disabled too plus I have hoarding tendencies due to childhood trauma. So, it can be really difficult to keep my space clean and neat.
But I still manage to do it. And when it gets to be too much I reach out for help.
I have a kid and my biggest fear is that he’d be taken away from me.
In fact, his room got a little untenable so we waited until he was away at grandma’s for a weekend hanging out with his cousins, and my husband and I tackled his room and cleaned it and tidied it.
By the end we just had 3 small-ish boxes of things for him to go through and decide whether to donate or keep.
He was thrilled with the change and said that it took a lot of stress off of him because now he can just keep it tidy.
We even set up a calendar with a cleaning schedule for vacuuming and cleaning his bathroom.
Having it on a dry-erase board on the wall helps, I think. It’s there with his homework assignments like a deadline.
I’ve been thinking about saving up to have a professional organizer come in and help me better organize some of the places in my house that tend to collect clutter.
See I have depression like severe depression and there are days where I cant get my self to get out of bed my room gets bad but I always clean it when I have ups in my bipolar then I stay in a clean room for at least a few months then psychosis and depression hits hard and it just gets bad again it's a vicious cycle and I cant get out of it
I am the same lol I can’t watch these bc they trigger my depression used to still do the very odd time
"I hope it rains". I laughed my ass off when he said that.
The lady named Terri/Terry in one of the more recent seasons was worse. She hoarded out her elderly care patients’ homes and then yelled at one, Roy, who was a 95 yr old WWII vet in the show when he expressed how upset he was that she hoarded out his house. That lady needed to be arrested for elder abuse, instead they coddled her. So infuriating!!!
That's the nice thing about being adopted. I never get the, "I brought you into this world!" fit 😂
You just have good mentally healthy parents. Trust me, if you had toxic/abusive parents, they'd say, "I took you in when no one else wouldn't! Your own birth mother didn't want you. You could have ended up in foster care!" You'd still be expected to show absolute respect at all times because they adopted you.
That's a good point LMAO
“I yell because you don’t listen when I talk.” I know a woman who prides herself on the fact that she committed so hard to not yelling at her kids, that as she gets more angry and frustrated, she gets quieter and quieter until they listen when she whispers. There are ways around yelling
My mom escalates my name and it's terrifying because I know I f***ed up if she does it 😂 First name. Then First and middle. Then you know you're in deep water if she uses your full name. No yelling, no screaming. Just calling your name. It worked wonders on my sister and I 😂
Mine does too.
Well damn now im intimidated of whispers lol
I once had an arguement w/someone over the fact that i said the children should be removed from the house bc it was child abuse to have them living in a hoarder situation. They said cps was worse. Im like how is it cool to live in cramped compartments full of trash, dust, mold? They arent learning how to clean, theyre getting sick. People would rather the kids clean this huge disgusting mess than take the kids away. Its not the kids responsibility to clean up a mess their sick parent made?
It's a no win situation, too often. Some foster parent home are good. But so many are just as awful, if not worse. I grew up near one and the mother treated her biological kids like gold and the foster kids like secondclass citizens. Yes, she was still better than the home they were taken out of, but knowing you're second best if that has to do a number on your psyche. And this lady you'd think was a nice, old woman who loves to laugh and loves animals.
@Orquet-qj2nf they could at least live with a relative. In this situation, let the son take the brothers. It's better for everyone. The mom isn't going to change, she's a lost cause. The dad doesn't have a backbone, he's no use and won't try and fix the situation or leave and take his kids with him in order to do better by them. They both should be charged w/child neglect
Often it's very hard on children to feel like they're taken from the parent and there is a lot of resentment toward a foster parent initially because no matter how desperate your situation is, intuitively we all want our natural parents real love. There is no substitute for that, and foster parents can swing either way on the pendulum from horrible to truly caring; but fostering is not supposed to be permanent it's supposed to end eventually in reunification, and hopefully would have visitation and a plan for the parents to fix whatever situation that caused the removal. Fostering is a very difficult time in any child's life and would hopefully be the last resort in any case, and usually they look for placement in some kind of family member first. I have a very close relationship to multiple members of DCF due to a personal relationship I have, so I've got a little insight to how it should work. People are quick to say remove a child from a home, but often if there is running water, food in the pantry, and a place for the child to sleep, if no physical abuse is reported children's services are often very overwhelmed with much more critical cases besides "oh, this house just has WAY too much stuff, " as opposed to "this child's needs are not being met at all". Now, if feces, mold, bugs...ect were present and access to clean water, food was contaminated, and the child's health was at risk, yes they are way more likely to get involved.
You are right on the money I grew up in a hoarding house and I had to teach myself how to clean and I still struggle with it. It was not a good environment at all but a lot of people will say that at least they aren't hurting the kid They forget how kids learn how to be an adult from watching their parents and if the parents struggle so will the child
As a kid who was in and out of homes with a hoarder parent, trust me, it sucks whether you’re still in that house or you’re living somewhere else. You make a great point of course, both options suck but one is definitely the healthier option
When she said I’m not worried if they take my kids bc they will learn a lesson, that ticked me right off!!!
My ",wonderful" mother had no problem throwing my stuff away. She tossed out my comic books, baseball cards- from the 50s, 60s and 70s. Plus other important things. She did this while I was on my senior trip with friends after graduating. Then she turned my whole bedroom into her own dressing room. I about died when I got back. After died she had about 400 pairs of shoes and every closest was filled with clothing. The house was pretty big, too! She was a narcissist and a horrible mother! 😖 😒 😪
I about died reading this
I’m deeply sorry 💔
I am so sorry. The violation alone must have been devastating.
Thank You both so much! It means a lot to me. I'm now 69 years old and it still effects me.
Love You both!!! 💖💓💖💓💖💓
Ugh I am so sorry 😭😭
@@lindazwalsh217 yes of course understandable, certain things do stick with us. Hope you can heal and find some peace of mind. Everyday is blessing so breathe deep and make the most of it ❤️
OH MY GOD I’m so glad y’all are talking about this pos woman.
The AUDACITY she had to sit here and say if CPS were called it would be a “lesson” to her children because she thinks they are/were supposed to clean her stuff. Woman, they can’t even safely move that stuff.
I also feel a little bad for the husband; I know he’s a push over, but you can tell he’s at least trying to clean/change.
It’s annoying when you have to deal with someone who refuses to listen but loves to pass blame.
She was like a snapping dog anytime they touched her trash, of course they wouldn't want to touch it to clean it-
Reformed hoarder here. Throw the crap out. It feels SO good to only have the best things and not all the extra junk. It's ike curating a collection from your own stuff. And then you can donate the rest and feel good about it ☺️
I'm proud of you I know it is a struggle to overcome 🥰
@@SJ431 thank you! If you're struggling too, medication helps
When I moved out to another state after high school, my parents wrote me a letter and told me not to read it until I got to my new home. It was all about how I owe them nothing because I never asked to be born and if anything they owe ME for enhancing their life/marriage and that they will always help me emotionally, financially, etc insomuch as they are able and they have always held true to that. I'm almost 40 now and they're in their 70s and need more and more help doing simple things around their house and my husband and I are more than willing to take the time to help them, because they cultivated that loving relationship from the start. I'm so lucky to have the parents I do and I will be devastated when they pass. This woman doesn't seem to understand that when she passes, her family will probably be relieved to be rid of her. So sad
This is so beautiful
I love that. I am so glad you have/had that life. I feel my parents would be the same, if they were the type to write letters and/or express emotion so succinctly.
My mum - and to a lesser extent, my dad - would occasionally be "I do so much for [my brother]" etc... But that's mainly when he's being a knob and taking them for granted, and not out of bitter/narcissistic tendencies, just hurt. And that's fair
Your parents are literally the exact opposite of mine.
@PartnershipsForYou I am truly sorry to hear that. Every child deserves parents, but not all parents deserve children. I wish you all the love and success in the world my friend
How did she have custody of any children living like that???
Woman privilege
@@user-lv4ek9lk4l This has absolutely nothing to do with man vs woman, don't twist this.
@@msdeviantdizzyвυт ιт doeѕ.. pυт a corĸ ιn yoυr adgenda wнen ιтѕ υnneeded and υnalιgned wιтн realιтy.
@@user-lv4ek9lk4l This has gotta be bait, user-many letters and numbers
@@msdeviantdizzy It's 100% bait
How to get put in a home when your older 101:
But wait: she continues to hoard and the elder home repeatedly threatens to evict her if you somehow don’t get her to drop her 50 year habit. That was my grandmother.
This lady is a perfect example of Transactional Analysis in psychology. One of the concepts is you have 3 states, parent adult child. Without going into it too much, you want to converse at the same level, usually adult, but if you drop or raise to one of the other levels, you push the person you are speaking with to the opposite level. Since she is supposed to be an adult and parent but acts like a child, it pushes her children to the parent role. She's angry that her son tried to act like a parent. Well, that's because she went to the child state and forced him into the parent state.
This blew my mind. Good job and it explains why no one will be around my mom
o.o
My mom wasn't a hoarder but this, down to the T, is *exactly* the way my mom treated us. Watching this was literally a flashback to the past (thanks for keeping this from being an actual flashback, Ken and Dane).
I promise, none of those six boys will want her in their lives when they're able to escape and have their well deserved freedom away from her. If those kids had somewhere else to go, they would go.
My mom too... 😓
My own mother is exactly like this. She's not a hoarder but she demands absolute respect when she shows absolutely none to anyone. It's like she gave birth to me and my sister and that should be sufficient for 50 years of worship.
Mine is too; and she wonders why the kiddos close off from her
@@sya286 I think what happens is that Mom never wants to allow the kids to separate from her because she feels as though if she's not controlling us then we're going to abandon her and not take care of her in her old age. The thing is not allowing the kids to separate an individuate and become their own person it's going to create the sort of resentment that will see her spending her Twilight years completely alone and rightfully so. It's a long hard road for families like ours.
It’s narcissism, I was born of and raised by one, it’s the absolute worse and it puts an immeasurable amount of stress on oneself. I’m sorry y’all have to put up with it and I hope y’all remember to be kind to yourselves and care for your mental health. ❤
My mom is the same way. She wants us to worship at the altar of her ego just cause she birthed us and gave us food and shelter. She's always the victim, she's always the hardest working, the most inappropriated, and the final authority on EVERYTHING. She thinks it's a blessing to be in her presence and how dare we question that
My mother was like that too. Once I got my brother out of there I blocked her number. That's not a mother. That's barely a person.
I don't think the dad is just lazy. He seems like he's just been so trodden on by her that he's defeated
Honestly I was thinking he feels guilty about something with her
You dont get that luxury when the potential of your children entering care is on the line @@joywolf83
An absolutely browbeaten man
I reckon he's generally a pretty kind, non-confrontational person to begin with, but that evolved to staying silent about his wife's hoarding because - as you said - he's been so trodden on by her, but to also try and "keep the peace" for the sake of his kids.
right, she destroyed him. He's probably so broken inside.
I live with a hoarder. I's miserable :/
I can't throw anything out, or i'll be kicked onto the streets. I wanna help her clean up, but she wont let me.
I'm hoping to save up enough cash to move out soon. It's affecting me too, and I don't think she cares :/
❤❤❤ @@BRIANNA_00
@@BRIANNA_00Keep your head up, you got this!
@@BRIANNA_00 good luck, truly
It'll be okay but make sure you have safe people when you move out. I never moved out because I had no one and I'm still stuck taking care of my horder mom- Just GET OUT.
It’s disgusting when someone bullies those around them, then cries that they’re the victim being unfairly treated and persecuted. It reminds me of when Gordon Ramsay told either a restaurant owner or a hotel owner, “You dug the [bleeping] hole!” because the owner was trying to dodge responsibility and play the victim.
Gordon vs Narcissists is like an emotional exfoliant. I just feel better and cleaner watching him dress a stuck up bitch down.
I work and take care of my parents.. I love a clean, tidy environment. They don’t, lol. It can be downright soul crushing to come home from work to a mess that doesn’t get cleaned unless I do it. 😒
I can barely live with my parents putting stuff on the kitchen table after I clean. I couldn’t imagine living like this with THAT MANY PEOPLE
Dude... what is with that? Treating a kitchen table like an office desk, then wondering why they can't find something.
@@CowToesfor real! Can we have a clean space for five minutes 😅
It's the other way around at my house 😂 mom likes it clean
@@CowToessome people do that with ADHD. Helps keep track. Those people can find it but no else will. But I put bold letters on the some people lmao
I just got back from the doctor after being told I have the flu, curled in bed, and found that CinnamonToastKen posted. Maybe today isn't so bad after all.
Hope you're feeling better soon . I'm sick too but hoping we'll get a laugh today
Hope you feel better soon, just getting over 2 weeks of Flu in our house. I got it first then my wife had it an s my kiddo is now on the tail end of it! 😮 definitely no fun! Drink lots of water if you can! 🧡
Get better! This channel is like chicken noodle soup when you're sick.
Hope you'll get better soon! 😊
Had a small heart attack this morning because I've recently got out of hospital because of POTs and heart disease. Yeah maybe today ain't so bad because one of my favourite relaxing creators made a video and my heart rate lowered from high to normal rates. I hate when people say that watching videos and relaxing isnt great when damn its helped me more than it hasnt.
I don't understand how this type of abuse isn't treated with the same level of call out and resistance as any other type greedy, angry, controlling addict or abuser. I grew up with a mom like this, we had to fight like hell to keep the hoard at bay as best we could with no help from dad either. There are no feelings to consider, no soft words you can use to smooth things over, that's only enabling and giving control. "Professional techniques" only serve to drag things out, and the hoarder simply re offends when they leave. That's not treatment. Every single person should be responding to accusations of blame with "No, this is exclusively your fault." Every attempt to hang on to garbage met with, "No, this is trash and everyone including you, knows it." These people don't need consideration. They need a hard fast reality check, that they will not get away with this anymore, and be disallowed to run their own lives until they make good decisions. Don't negotiate with, coddle or comply with abusers.
I like the genuine reactions. I have other channels for information. Theres also so many channels that watch stuff ahead of time that it starts to feel fake. Keep the first time genuine reactions guys
I have hoarding tendencies, i can feel this need to buy things and not to throw things out, the need to surround myself with animals to love...its hard not to do it, but its just not healthy.
Me, too. I grew up with a mother who maybe would be kind, or maybe would scream in my face. Over the same issue. Now I take all the stuff I can for the feelings I get because I don't know when I'm going to get love next.
And my mom has the audacity to watch shows about hoarders and tell me that she worries about me, but meanwhile, a lot of hoarders are that way because they had a psycho b*tch for a mother. She conveniently forgets the parts where she screamed in the face of a little girl and has no idea why the little girl doesn't have a glowing report of her parenting style.
Keep fighting!!! Get stuffed animals....... Real animals are very dirty and need cleaning every single day to be healthy and happy. I have two and the amount of bodily fluids they produce is crazy lol
I like the blind reaction stuff. You and Buff say the funniest shit on the fly 😂
Lived with a hoarder, so glad to be out of that situation
She acts exactly like my mom (not a hoarder but both of my parents are just dirty and emotionally abusive), I'm treated just like steven, this was honestly validating af
My mother is a control hoarder. And I’m the only child. So guess who will be stuck with everything when she passes.
I’m having a mega bonfire and cutting my financial losses. She’s had a full storage unit for 30 years. $100 a month. You can’t even open the door anymore. But she ‘needs it’
🔥🔥🔥🔥
Giant yardsale first? At least make a bit of money. The storage unit ought to be full of not garbage, at least.
The things in the back could be antiques by now. 🤣
I feel this, my grandma was the same way. She had 2 of them it's $400 a month. When she was put into hospice my grandpa and I took advantage of her health going down hill to get rid of a lot of stuff.
KEEEP IT UNKNOWN.
LET IT BE REACTIONS.
WE LOVE THE CONTENT.
It’s genuine, original, the jokes are ON THE SPOT, not pre-written.
Ken & Dane, ya’ll is your jobs perfectly. Don’t change it.
dude... my mom stresses and CONSTANTLY complains. Then she gets mad when i unintentionally tune her out because she says so much random stuff and is negative so often i just have to tune her out so i can try and relax
Imma be honest for a sec, I watched this episode and all i could just see was own mother. Every person in this episode is parallel to someone in my family and it hurts to watch. I used to be the steven to my mom, til i moved. Its nice to see ken and buffpro validate every thought/feeling i and my siblings have had for a long time.
My mom is just like this woman and her mother was the exact same, she says that she needs our help, but never takes it. I love my mom, but she just makes me sad and I just wanna leave this house.
Good luck. I hope you're able to get freedom sooner than later.
If that man feels any love for his kids at all he'll take them and go. Even if she cleans up and never hoards again her entire personality and attitude towards them is so abusive.
Living with a hoarder (stuff stacked to the ceiling, stuff falling, unsanitary, anger/rage fits, gaslighting, doesn't care for anyone's space or comfort), and often cleaning up/picking up literally trash (with food) she would leave out instead of putting in the trash can and then getting the reasponce "STOP ThRoWiNG AwAy My StUfF". I now live on my own with a clean decorated space (interior design major). :|
Nice. Happy for you!
Me too! my grandma was a hoarder and she would frequently abuse us (mostly verbally) because her house was dirty and it was our (her children's) responsibility to clean it but if we tried to clean it she'd call the police or abuse us anyways. I moved out at 18 and never looked back, now my mom and I live separately from her and appreciate every single day that we don't have to live in her filth. Have fun decorating your space :)
The irony with control issues is that the actions/behavior taken to gain or maintain control often end up giving you less
PS hoarding is a disorder. Diseases have to be transmissible; thank god hoarding is not!
MS isnt transmissible and its still called a disease...Still sure about your about that boss?
This was not what I expected, my mom is like this mom in so many ways... So hearing you guys saying things like I didn't ask to be brought into the world and you did what was legally required felt validating so thank you! 😅
No way to “pre-watching”! The BEST Part is enjoying genuine FIRST reactions
✨together✨ 😂
I listen to hoarders when i do spring cleaning. It inspires me to get rid a lot more stuff, lol
I'm not far away from being a hoarder, my mom is just now breaking her own hoarding tendencies and I can sometimes understand how hard it is but I've not been able to see how you put those objects above your family. I always have to silence the thoughts of "you may need this later, this may be worth something" in my head and how I do that is reminding myself I'm safe and that I don't need it. I need the space for things that add to my life like playing with my dog and the crafts I enjoy.
My mother was similar. She yelled all the time. And then would get angry if we chose not to react or respond to her.
You be surprised how many mothers think their children owe them simply because they gave birth. It's 100% a control tactic.
I know it was a joke but "would you die for your parents" can actually tell you a lot about what kind of relationship people have with their parents in very few words. I'd do anything for my mom including risk myself to save her. Same for my son. I know a lot of people who hate their parents so much they wouldn't piss on them if they were on fire lol
My dad was a pack rat but at least our house was clean. The stuff he kept was family memorabilia or had sentimental value tucked away neatly in closets or our shed. Hoarding unimportant things like rotten food or items for a possible project or gift that will never get done is insane. I feel embarrassed if I leave a couple empty water bottles or a plate out when people come over.
I’m a clutter bug to :) but a clean, organized and dusted one.
This was my childhood and I left the moment I turned 18. Always someone else’s fault but you get screamed at for cleaning!
Steven is not going to talk to her again once he moves out 💃🏻💃🏻
2:08 we need a compilation of clips where Ken's just being.. spot on..
I saw this episode yesterday and I thought to myself, Ken would definitely like this one, welp my wish came true lmao
Would you have the name of the episode?
Ken and Dane! ❤ best CZcamsrs ever.
This episode of hoarders is horrifying. Those poor boys.
I friggin love these guys!!
Not a hoarder situation, but this is exactly how my family is. Aggressive, controlling mother that attacks everyone in the family when she doesn’t get her way. Father doesn’t want to say anything to avoid conflict. My heart seriously goes out to these kids, this kind of behavior affects you for life.
When you're trying to teach a sibling a valuable skill and your parent/guardian asks "who's the parent here?" you know they're not really yours. Then other times you're the "3rd parent" and expected to take care of the sibling for some reason...
There's enough channels that do it the educational way. The format of this channel is perfect. I want to say it's unique because of the vibes, the dual reactions, buff's laugh, and the chemistry between you two.
But the fresh reactions are the best.
9:15 the definition of "abusive relationship." ANY abusive relationship. "I did XYZ for you so how dare you bring up the awful things I did"
I grew up surrounded by hoarders and do this day still deal with their bs.
I can pack everything I own into a car. It’s not healthy but stuff makes me so angry now. I probably need therapy.
I like both of your styles of video Ken. I like being sat down for Story Time with Papa Ken and Uncle Buff just as much as I love you guys recoiling in horror because you weren't prepared for the atrocities contained in a single video.
My mom is a narcist, and she has a military base full of clothes. My parents are unfortunately still together due to money, but hate each other. There's piles of mail, boxes, clothes, everywhere except for my room and bathroom, She constantly says I have control issues, when I've cleaned up the best I could everyday with 7 cats in the house. I just do it because it makes me feel better, wonder where those control issues came from, just in another form. It's disgusting, and they'll throw the "I gave birth to you" in your face, and when you express how everything is stressful, they tell you it's your fault, and how no one cares for them... I never got to be a child, and I wish that on no one. It's pathetic and disgusting behavior. I'm almost 23 now, and I'm sick of it, I ignore her now. Unfortunately it's too hard to move out right now without roommates.
Dane’s “That one made me mad! **LAUGHS**” sums up this channel so well
Omg the way she cries “Disrespect!!” anytime anything slightly challenges her absolutely grinds my gears
In my experience, I’ve lived with a hoarder and it was a constant battle of them not wanting me to help but them saying they want to get better. When I was trying to clean and the stuff appears faster than I could keep up with so that’s why it’s so clean but also just stuff still piling up.
First, this video really pissed me off, because my mom is a lot like this woman. Demands respect from everyone, gives it to no one and expects to be worshipped because they percieve themselves to be great. She spent years trying to break my brother and I down and lower our self worth so we wouldnt leave... we finally got out.
Seeing all the people who went through similar stuff, and instead of being bitter and angry, everyone here is being nice, supportive and sharing their stories. Thank you, all of you. We're all bigger than the things that happened to us ❤
my dad is exactly like this lady. what happened when my brother, sister, and i grew up? we dont talk to him bc we cant relax around him, and he mopes around wondering why. and yet - we still have to play along with him or else all hell breaks loose. having a relationship with a person like that is impossible because its only on their terms, and the terms change on a whim. its just tense, and angry (no wonder i have raging debilitating anxiety lmao)
couldnt hold back commenting after she said the thing about daring her kids to call cps. that has to be the catchphrase for these people, and guess what!! it will make ur kids resent u (and make them feel more threatened by you!!) pick your poison
Heeyyyyy she sounds like my mom and my granny, in the way that they too complain that no one helps (though everyone else does everything) and gets angry if we touch their things 😂
It kinda reminds me of my dad. He had a really messy room, so my sisters forced me to clean it all by myself while he was in the hospital. Then he started yelling at me for getting rid of his stuff (even though it was mostly just trash) when he got home. Then when he moved out, he forced me to clean it up all over again.😑
I grew up in a hoarders house(both my parents are hoarders). I remember it was so bad i was never allowed to invite people over as a kid. Its so hard not to slip into the bad habits we had growing up. I have to actively try every day to keep everything tidy but i do
Eileen reminds me of my dad growing up. (not to the same extent), but he would get disproportionately enraged over the slightest of things he deemed to be a problem and was/ is extremely totalitarian. i was often the only one to stand up for myself and against his tyranny and neuroticism and because of it i became, like what you said, the main 'villain' to him. i'm sad to say that it's caused a lot of distance between us as father and daughter. it's sad because i love him, but i'm hurt by the way he's treated me throughout my upbringing; and even more hurt by his lack of accountability now we're older.
My complaint about that show is they're so indulgent and treat the piles of garbage so gently. It feels like they're giving into the delusion. Makes me want to scream!
Grew up like this, still trying to get out of it to this day. Still live with my mom, can't move out yet, livin the dream😂
Imagine tryna cook anything in that kitchen, Christ Almighty
You don't, you get inspiration from tiny apartments, make a micro kitchen in your bedroom and only go to the kitchen to use the stove/sink.
This was literally a flashback to my childhood, and not in the good way. Thanks to you two for calling her out and making this bearable to watch without giving me a panic attack.
My mom tells me that I owe her because she gave birth to me. I always thought that was kinda crummy, now I realize it's abusive. Thanks Buff and Ken. ❤️
Remember the hoarder that thought her son ranaway was found buried under one her piles when they started cleaning her house out.
I believe that was in England, am I correct?
As the Steven of the family I feel for him. He picks the fights so the other siblings don’t have to. When there’s an abusive parent an older sibling often steps in to draw attention from the others.
As a psych major ur channel always makes me wanna do a deep dive into people’s minds… thanks for the free education Ken and Dane!
Then you should watch channels like the Kiwi Tapes as they cover some of the most deranged internet characters.
@@JustaPersonTryinToHuman365 thank u I will definitely check those out!
Watching this show makes me so grateful for growing up in a healthy and clean house and family environment.
I think the worst situation is when hoarders have like 100 animals extremely neglected and after they get help, they ALWAYS let them keep like 1 or 2 animals???? Like HUH???
I recently emptied my storage unit and brought everything into my apartment and have gone through and thrown out a lot before hitting a wall, (lots of junk I dont want but I'm not home much because of work and when I have a day off I just clean the common areas and become too worn out to keep trucking.) This video has inspired me to throw out so much more stuff that I hadnt even thought of getting rid of before seeing this crazy bat trying to hold onto so much useless garbage
Like much of abuse, people are okay with it because they're worn down over time. Eventually you're just like: well, it's not changing so I'm just going to pretend it ain't there.
This reminds me of when I was little and I asked my dad to stop smoking in the truck with me in it cause kids were saying I smelled like smoke. I can’t imagine what these kids gotta go through with what others say, there is no way clothes stay good smelling in a place like this. You can’t practice hygiene in a place like this, it’s horrible.
Also please keep your videos reactionary, I like hearing and seeing your true emotions.
Yeah that's hoarder 101, they're miserable and they want help, but they also don't want you deciding what goes.
Worse. My Mom insisted it was all her 'memories', and that we could 'fix' that. Things like the filthy formerly white couch cushion covers. She threw an arm shaking FIT when I told her those 20+ year old stuff drowned couches needed to GO. They stank and had holes in them.
Mean I wasn’t a hoarder but I had a big time post army mental health problem that I fought help for a bit, but at a certain point you gotta just man up and admit you are not driving the car right and someone else needs ri take the wheel for a bit
She loves being miserable tho. That’s the main problem. She doesn’t actually want help.
@@cyberus1438 So agree there. Had PTSD from an accident. Had to get through it on my own. (no coverage). Finally now for all of that and the rest I got a therapist. One of the best things I think I have ever done. I so WISH my mom (not as nasty, that was left to Step Father) would have gotten help with her hoarding. I have finally gotten over my repeat nightmares of drowning in STUFF.
lmao this is just like my mom. Control, control, control. My dad is similar to this lady's husband too. He just. Doesn't know how to deal with her. It's insufferable to live with.
Oh I have a mother that says that all the time it’s so draining. “I raised you and took care of you so you owe me” that’s how my mother is she expects me to pay her back aswell” like I raised you and spent money you owe me thousands of dollars” I’ve been told that so much luckily I’m an adult now but it sucks my mother expects my little brother to take care of her now.
I like it when you guys react to it for the first time. It’s like we are all watching it together and we all have the same reactions.
Many of my past "friends" were like this woman. I lived in houses with them where they would get mad if the place wasn't cleaned, but wouldn't clean themselves. And if you said anything they would push it off on their partner, their kids, you, anyone but themselves. I learned very early on to never live with other people, to never let others stay with you for long, especially without contracts and very set boundries in said contracts. Needless to say, I don't speak to any of those people anymore and my life is lovely without them and their garbage, both literally and figuratively speaking.
Everyone is so quick to want kids removed. The system is 100% not a better place for children. Some foster homes are nice but the reality is it’s rare for a child to even get permanent placement and they spend their time bouncing around from house to house sometimes suffering the unimaginable. Only 47% of foster youth even graduate high school.
This is clearly a mental disorder, the state of mental health needs addressing. Hope everyone gets all the health care they need.
I appreciate how genuine it feels when you guys watch the videos with us for the first time. It adds an authentic charm to your reactions
this woman is a covert narcissist
She quacks like a duck, she waddles like a duck, and she shits on the lawn like a duck. I think it's okay to call her a duck. Nevermind "but she hasn't been diagnosed yet, D:
More like a malignant narcissist.
@@awesomeandy8588absolutely
I myself suffer from poor organization skills. I'm slightly mentally disabled but I'm in shape and Iv'e been cleaning more often lately and getting my house in order. One thing I have come to realize is, sometimes people become a different type of tired. I'm not defending this lifestyle, I always clean my dishes and clotges, in the winter time though I literally just feel like I'm dead. I'll get extremely depressed and everything I do just feels like I'm doing it because I have to. I guess what I'm saying is hoarders are not mentally well, also they are not all the same. I simply accumulate trash rather fast, I have no attachments to it and my house has plenty of space left.