Daycare Baby Brains, Helicopter Parents, And The Feminization Of Boys
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- čas přidán 11. 07. 2024
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Erica Komisar is speaking truth backed by physical and social science. Turns out, infants need their mothers. Infants detached from their mothers have an increase in cortisol, the stress hormone. This can cause increases in anxiety and depression later in life. Is this one of the causes of the spike in mental illness?
"We're in the Upside Down." We treat very young children as if they are much older and capable than they are. We treat older children as if they are not capable and don't allow them any freedom or free play time . . . We need to reverse this."
Boys are feminized in our schools. We treat their energy as bad behavior and don't allow more physical activities to release it. Schools are built today for girls. Boys have high surges in testosterone between the ages of 3-6 years old, and we often treat this with medication.
Erica Komisar's Website - www.ericakomisar.com/
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"It is a fundamental truth that the responsibilities of motherhood cannot be successfully delegated. No, not to day-care centers, not to schools, not to nurseries, not to babysitters.
Beguiling voices in the world cry out for “alternative life-styles” for women. They maintain that some women are better suited for careers than for marriage and motherhood.If you listen and heed, you will be lured away from your principal obligations." Ezra Taft Benson
And the fact that motherhood can be a time of life. Some feminists see motherhood as a lifetime castigation, instead of a phase that, compared to our long life spans, could be part of our lives and then s our children grow and become parents of their own, we can go get that “career” and be focused on ourselves (and spouses). But no one respects SAHM on a resume.
@@hannahpetersen4002 yes, so much this. It's a season. I know so many women who raised their babies and then went on to careers.
When we are taught, "motherhood is the most important thing you will ever do." What people heard was "it's the only thing ever, you're dooooooooomed!"
What I teach my daughters is *among* the many good and important things they will do, motherhood is at the top.
Exactly
This is a conference talk that is needed today but doubt ever will. The people dont want to hear it and church leaders would be excoriated for saying it today ......which is sad. I find nothing more beautiful than a mother at home with her children instead of corporate slavery ....
I had 11 children, breastfed them for 2-3 years each and homeschooled them, and they are all so awesome, though some are a little troubled right now because of deep grief, because their daddy passed away 3 years ago
I’m so sorry for your loss!! What a legacy those beautiful children are and you as their mother. ♥️
I am an elementary teacher, and everything that was discussed today I have noticed and spoken about with my colleagues. However, even though I am on the frontlines with the children, I am bound by the "orders from the generals". Unfortunately, education is driven by power and greed. It is extremely frustrating!
One can't blame leaders when they choose to follow bad orders. The one who takes action is to blame.
@@csmusix I agree completely with the moral argument you're making, I tend to lean that way most of the time; although we have to be careful because if we have too many good teachers that are being too aggressive in a good way or not "following bad orders", then they will just be replaced with teachers that will just fall in line. Or, if we have too many good teachers taking a stand and "not taking action" to the bad orders and leaving the educational system because it doesn't fall in line with their morals (which is a noble thing), then we are left with the teachers that are just taking orders... We NEED good teachers that believe in what is being discussed here on the front lines but in order to stay on the front line, they will have to fall in line with a certain amount of "marching orders" so to speak.. It's a case of choose your battles... Not saying you are wrong but I also don't think it's as black and white as you are suggesting.
Wowza, people! Perhaps in my hurry I didn't explain myself enough? Good teachers are not morally corrupting a nation, and there are a LOT of good teachers stuck in this flawed system of ours! We are teaching what we are told to teach (math, reading, etc - nothing nefarious, at least in most cases). We just don't have the tools we need to teach everything that is required, we are bound by the lack of recess for our young boys in particular, and we are at the mercy of all the different types of parents that can be found in this world. Your responses felt like if I don't march on Washington and take over the Department of education, it is my fault for sticking with a system that droves of people are giving up on and just doing my best with the parameters given. Even if the school board would hire me as the superintendent of my school district, because the education ship has been following this course for so long, the only course of action to fix the everything is to annihilate it all and start over. Even then, it is arrogant of myself to suppose "that if only I were in charge" things would be better. I do what I can, when I can, express my thoughts when and where I can in non-contentious scenarios, and do what I can in my own classroom. This is where my power lies.
One thing is clear, public education will always be a failure in a sin saturated society. When the sinful make the decisions, the nation ripens for destruction.
@@csmusix You can only be written up by administrators so many times before the teacher is unfortunately dismissed.........are good teachers to leave the profession and leave it ONLY to the Gadiantons to proceed with education?
Thank you for this video!! I felt so incredibly pressured to go back to work when my oldest was only a couple months old. I think i only lasted a few weeks. We have three children now and we just started homeschooling. The struggle is real, financially, but it is so important for me to be the one raising my children.
I've also noticed the comments on social media videos of big families are so so sad too. People say that the parents of these kids are actually neglecting them and abusing them by having so many children. Things are so backwards 😭
You are THE best person to educate your kids because you care the most about them and know them the best! You've got this! (HS for 12+ and now I'm on the other side of it and am so glad we sacrificed to make it work!)
I'm from a non LDS family, and my parents drank beer and ate, drank, and we're merry so to say, but thankfully my mom sent me to Sunday school when I was a toddler, and I felt the spirit, in a Baptist church Sunday school and it's because the Lord wanted me to know Him, I believe, because I dreamed a Shepherd Man holding 1 sheep, and I guess I have the gift of faith. The restored gospel came into my life around age 14-15, and I read the New Testament and wanted,felt I needed baptism, and the Lord led me to the Church of Jesus Christ
Young men have definitely been feminized and the family unit is under attack by various aspects. Hookup culture is terrible and I think feminism, in its extremity has done some damage. We've got a lot of work to do!
“Further, we warn that the disintegration of the family will bring upon individuals, communities, and nations the calamities foretold by ancient and modern prophets.”
We walked right into as a society...we practically accelerated once the proclamation was given.
Prophets can see around corners.
I have always found that statement fascinating. The calamities prophesies of our day are due to the family. Not drugs, not pornography, not hate or bigotry or anything else. Those seem to all be symptoms of the underlying disease: the disintegration of the family. Sure they can all contribute to that destruction, but importantly the solutions of our day must be bringing back the traditional family.
@@brainhunter1000,these calamities are not a result of global warming,but rather global sinning where we have abandoned family.
I’ve been watching this lady a ton and am now reading her book. I took my kids out of daycare recently because of her. Thanks for doing this interview!
amazing interview, my wife and I committed to doing the best we could so she can stay with them for the first 4 years at least while i went to work 2 sometimes 3 jobs. It was not easy.
As a woman (using her husbands YTaccount) Thank You!
Thank you for protecting and providing for your family. We need more men like you!
I have 3 grandchildren on the way this summer. I am a parent of 4 and I don't know the studies and the science but I can tell you everything she is saying is so valuable and needed right now. Love your children. Give them your time.
I am a former daycare worker and have seen firsthand the impact that large private daycare has had on children.
I’ve watched babies cry for their mothers with absolutely no understanding of where she has gone and why she left! Has to be damaging to their development for sure.
Then I saw the behaviour of the 3 year olds who had been there since babies, the boys get aggressive and the girls are withdrawn. I want to shout from the rooftops for society to stop this!
I worked at a daycare too and took my children with me. It was so sad. I cried for the babies on the first day and often after that. I quit as soon as my husband graduated with his degree and I could stay home. I also saw children cry for their favorite day care worker. Many children were more attached to their favorite worker than their parents.
Such an interesting interview! I would say one thing, though: kids are not too busy just because of academics. They are enrolled in countless structured activities like sports and lessons. I currently have an 8 year old student enrolled in 5 activities every week! This is not uncommon. These children have no free time to just play, and their parents' time with their children involves shutting them from one activity to the next. It is neglectful, and the results are overly stressed out children, which I see on a weekly basis like never before as an extracurricular teacher.
I love Erica Komisar, and I think you did well at interviewing her and letting her speak. She's got a very important message. I only disagree with her that there's a government solution. The government can't even send out COVID checks without billions in fraud. There's so many other ways governments is Ill suited for that job. It must be a cultural effort and social networks that can make it happen. I very much agree that we as a society must figure out how to sacrifice for our children, instead of sacrificing them.
well said!
I lived in Florida for a while and our ward was half English half Haitian. The Haitian babies never cried. They always just sat on their mother slaps for the entirety of church and I would look at them and I was like I don’t get this and even when they were too, they just sit with their mother happily while all the other babies were running around crazy until they got to nursery.
This was so good! I really wish I could redo it all over again. I listened to the “stupid experts” that said don’t baby your baby and let them cry. I totally see the ramifications from it. I also work in special ed and totally agree that the boys are just being medicated just to sit in school. It is frustrating as I just see little boys that need to move. I am actually going to leave asap because I so disagree with our education system. Thank You Erica!!!
I celebrated the day my boys were finally out of the school system, and that’s in Australia. We have the same problems. So sad 😞
I teach in Primary and have a couple of Sunbeams (boys) who like to climb instead of sitting. They aren't distracting the girls and they are paying attention to the lesson so I let it go. My co-teacher is absent for the next month so I have subs that tried to get them to sit still. Originally, my reason for allowing "irreverent" behavior is because one little guy struggles with being separated from his sister and the other one has family challenges. I want the environment to be welcoming and for them to know I love them above anything else. After hearing Dr. Komisar teach about feminizing boys, I have another reason to include physical activity as part of our lesson. Hopefully, we can help our youth leaders become aware of this. Boys and girls are different, every child is unique and precious, and we need to regard them as such.
Ya I’m going to say it: we need mothers to stay home with the kids and raise the kids, women don’t need to be working. This is plain and simple to fix. Yes there are roles for women and roles for men.
Absolutely. 🎯
Oh!! Women that stay at home are working .woman! It's the equivalent of 2 and 1/2 full-time jobs. If stay at home mothers were valued in terms of the work they accomplished I believe it would be more encouraged.
I agree with all you said, I believe that the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world and preserves the future.
I stayed home and raised 5 amazing kids because I knew this even back in the last century.
It's common sense isn't it???
I'm 54. My mom divorced before I was born, and went back to work 2 weeks after I was born. All that she says about attachment is true. Now, unfortunately I also had neighbors/caregivers that abused me so that added to the mental problems that had me seeking help after having my own babies. All that to say, we HAVE to stop teaching women and girls that the only way they contribute to society is by creating financial wealth for the kids. I've been blessed to be a SAHM. I NEVER thought I would ever enjoy it. And it wasn't easy. But we made it work and I was able to grow and heal and love myself as I watched these sweet children of mine grow. I count it a true blessing that I was able to nurture and teach and lead them. They are my greatest achievement.
Do I think i should support single women who choose to have babies out of wedlock? NO! If they have an employer that can and will pay them for that, that is great. Otherwise they need to find another way to be home with their kids and afford life.
I agree with almost everything except government involvement which often leads to government overreach. We need to resolve the issues related to moms working outside the home ourselves. Leave the government out.
There are other governments that have given tax credits for women staying home with young children. I'm in favor of that because it's simply just the government stealing less money from you. Paid leave is just such a terrible idea and will totally be abused just like welfare is abused.
@@AngelPuff1012 amen to that! I'm all in favor of giving the government less of our hard earned money.
Dont agree with her paid leave proposal for mothers. Another socialist initiative for corps and govt. Unfair for singles and empty nesters and RESPONSIBLE parents who sacrificed to fund another program. It's 100% feasible for most families to have a SAHM but we are hyper materialistic and dont want to sacrifice. Used to live in Huntington Beach. Very hard to make it there with a SAHM but now live in FL and I see SAHM families all over. Many live in SFRs that are modest new 1300sf homes (which was normal in the 50s even with families 2-3 x the size of today) w one car garages. Mortgage is less than rent and fixed unlike rent . The truth is that people dont want to sacrifice .....
Live small. Work hard. Sacrifice. Procreate / have sex within marriage only. Remove the cash and prizes incentives from divorce so divorce is not a reward.
She clearly doesnt understand the toxicity of feminism. She picks and chooses her points. I have no issue with choice but it goes way deeper than that with its MARXIST roots and is the source of the massive family destruction and lack of formation. Have her on with Rachel Wilson, a Catholic author of "Occult Feminism" or Suzanne Venker and they can lay out its evil roots and effects today which have totally uprooted not just marriage but the dating process
Well said!
This was really a fascinating podcast! I really liked the guest and her comments resonated with me how she mentioned that America almost has child raising inverted, where parents project adult capacities onto babies, but treat teens like babies, restricting their autonomy! It's true how infants need their primary caregiver to regulate the baby's stress so the baby can learn to become mentally healthy and independent after three years of age.
The thought: God's ways are higher than man's ways, keeps coming to mind.
As a combat veteran i left the church due to the feminization of the church as a whole. No more warriors fighting for truth. With the exception of this channel. Credit where credit is due.
You can be the one that fights for truth too❤
Come back, my brother in Christ. The Old Ship Zion needs your influence. Come help us bale out the water, instead of bailing out of the Ship. There is still much good fruit in this wild olive tree.
P.S. I served as well - you have my respect
Erica Komisar's message is such a blessing for a parent to hear right now. Thank you for having her on.
You're welcome!
So grateful I trusted my intuition. I nursed my babies until they were 3. So grateful my incredible who husband worked so hard so I that could be home with my young children.
Excellent!! I’ve also liked ward radio’s shows lately on how the church even has abandoned men…
Thank you for addressing this issue so well
THIS SHOULD BE SPOKEN AT THE TOP OF THE ROOF TOPS!!!
I totally agree with all of this and we raised our children this way. The sad thing is that now they compare themselves with their peers and feel that they're less because we didn't force them to be high achievers.
Who pays for paid leave? Does she have a plan for that? Just wondering. She's right that in general conservatives will get behind the message. But why does it always come down to a government fix? Why does she still trust them to do something well? And what strings will be attached to that paid leave? It's more complex than just pay people to stay home, as we found out spring 2020, and we will be paying for that inflation for years to come.
Put a limit on senior executive salaries / bonuses / etc Mothers used to be at home; families could live on one salary. Then CEOs realized they could grab all the profits. Feminists demanded employment out of the home, the CEOs were happy to comply. Now 2 salaries are necessary to support a family.
Billionaire CEOs contribute nothing to society.
@@cassandrabranch1729taxing the rich to pay for the poor has not worked… just look at the most taxed and regulated cities… is it the CEO’s fault or the greedy families who sacrificed thier kids to gain a few dinners out and an extra bedroom in the house ? I blame the feminist movement….
Put a limit on welfare. No welfare for longer than 5 years: use that time to gain skills and or education to build a better life. Instead we have generational poverty because people are paid by the government to be unmarried mothers and never get jobs so actual disabled people can’t get support they need. Redo the entire budget eliminating all pork and revert to single-issue voting and stop send our tax dollars to foreign nations and I guarantee there will be surplus for extending mothers benefits to have longer than 6 week maternity LOA.
I totally agree!
I absolutely agree. As conservatives, of course we agree with this message; but we are of course worried about sustainability and practicality. How are we actually going to fund paid leave for *each* child of *each* woman? Is it presumptuous to assume models that have worked in smaller countries will work just the same in one as large and complex as the US?
Also, as you said, it's a government program. 2 words: corruption & bloat. Who's ever seen a government program that had "enough" funding?
Thank you for having this lady on your show. I hope this video gets lots of views. As a great grandmother I value her message to the younger generation. Allowing ones baby to cry in their cot was always heartless to me but to social workers it was required to not spoil them and allow them to get some air in their lungs. I always love your show. Thank you to both of you. ❤ love from UK
I was a preschool teacher for 5 years. I saw the damage happening in these kids. When i started having kids i quit and stayed home. I also homeschool. I agree with this woman 100%.
There's some context in this argument that makes it a little hard for me to take. There is an assumption that "education" from a university is the best way to succeed and provide for a family. I'm going to be bold enough to say the contrary is what is true. "Not enough men at the universities" is not a cue that society is unraveling at all! At least not in the way that it is being presented here. I could elaborate, but I'll keep this short.
I agree that too much pressure is forced on society to get formal educations. 95% of society are bucket carriers and 5% are pipeline income earners who don't always have degrees. Our Founding Fathers were mostly entrepreneurs. We need to teach our children ALL options available. Entrepreneurship skills are purposely not being taught in order to keep the 95% scrambling to make ends meet by selling out their time.
What a refreshing conversation. It's nice to get away from theory and bathe in natural truth from time to time.
This confirms so much of how I felt led to raise my kids and what I've seen and experienced. She is an amazing, eloquent-speaking source! Thank you Greg for interviewing her! (And you're really good at it so thank you for that.)
Thank you!
Maybe multi-generational homes might be a solution. I feel like everyone feels so entitled to their own home, vacations, eating out, and so much more. I remember living with my husband’s parents, we never went out to eat, even though I craved Taco Bell in my 2nd pregnancy, we couldn’t afford it, we hardly ever went on a vacation, that money went to housing, we ate a lot of casseroles and we made it, because I was home, my husband was able to excel at his job and eventually things got easier. My oldest went on his first real vacation after his mission!
My daughter was single and felt strongly impressed to sell her home, move back in with us and buy Grandpa's farm land (which she could only do if she lived with us). We fully supported her decision.
A year later she met a wonderful man who she married, he moved in as well. (College student)
They were planning on children after college, but Heavenly Father made sure their little one was on the way two months later.
My daughter had struggled with health issues since birth and pregnancy was extremely difficult. What we didn't expect was birth leaving her so damaged she would be left bed ridden for months and unable to lift or carry her baby for a year.
Her living with us was a huge blessing as her husband assisted through the night while I took over throughout the day.
My granddaughter is now 2 and is a pleasure to have in our home. I told my daughter that when it comes time for them to move it's going to break all our hearts
Yes, and mainstream media promotes the entitlement mentality. When I bought my car a few years ago, the salesman didn't tell me the cost of the car, but instead assured me I can afford the monthly payments. Unfortunately, I couldn't afford to buy a car with cash and need reliable transportation to support myself, so I'm stuck for another year. I can also testify that feeling entitled to enormous houses with dining rooms that nobody dines in, kitchens that are for looks only, two or more guest bedrooms, etc. only leads to a mountain of debt, which leads to broken marriages, hurt children, and the decay of society. Just like our prophets warned us.
I was a SAHM, exclusively breastfed all my kids, was very hands-on and was home with them until they were 7, 13 and 18 and wouldn't have had it any other way. I didn't have children just to have someone else raise them and I loved being home with them. When I had to go back to college/work after an unwanted divorce, my mom retired and she and my already-retired dad took care of them. There was no way my family was going to let strangers care for them. I continued to be a very hands on mom, my now-adult kids turned out great and I have great relationships with all of them.
I have always believed the women belong in the home. That is not very popular with the feminists, but we are uniquely qualified to raise and nurture our children, make a comfortable and inviting home for our husbands, and still have time to contribute to our communities, work in our gardens, keep up with the school boards activities etc. And, with the internet and a good book shelf we can always be learning. Men should have high enough salaries to support this and short enough hours to have ample time for their families. We have tools now that men can also do a lot of work from home, so that they can have time in the home. I have had these views forever. I never have been a dump the kid with a caretaker and have a career kind of person. I also think the (restored) Gospel foundation is imperative for happy thriving families. Children deserve a home with a biological mother and a father.
Dr Komisar is one of my absolute heroes (heroine!). Telling the truth for the sake of our children is worth the cost!
I agree with so much of what was said. Here's my beef with paid leave, especially long term. It's makes me less economically viable as an employee and therefore less desirable as an employee. I cost more to keep around with less output, overall, because I am gone more, but still have to be paid the same. This makes getting work harder for women. And how about instead of telling women they're too broken to be a good mom, we help them learn the skills to be a good mom.
Such a great episode. Man, so many need this message
She is correct about how valuable fathers are. Studies show:
1) single mothers ---- worst outcomes for kids. (btw this is on the rapid rise w hookup culture)
2) married couple----- best outcomes for kids
3) single fathers---- --- same outcomes as married
So why do unconstitutional feminist "family courts" (unconstitutional) give women the children up to 90% of the time? Because its all based on a gynocentric metric where men are not given "choice" ( she said feminism gives choice) to just naturally have 50% custody
Further outcomes show that women do what men cant do best in the early ages of child development. Heavy nurture (oxytocin) instead of being a corporate slave and having a stranger do that. But it's men who do what women cant do with adolescents to adulthood.
Women create boys
Men create men
Girls raised by fathers / married parents are also less promiscuous ...
How about we go with option 2 of making marriage great again and divorce rare....and in the cases where it does....men are given the choice of 50/50? But that would upend the who child support scam by the state. If 50/50...no child support needed.
Fathers are being deprived their choice.
@ruckin3- Obviously you have never fought over child custody with a former spouse. My ex wanted 50% custody and have our child live with him 50% of the time, and each share 50% of expenses, but we no longer lived in the same city. 50-50 doesn't work if your kid plans to go to public school or be home schooled by each parent. Private school was over $1 grand per month tuition per child and wasn't an option. I ended up getting custody but the amount of child support I was given didn't even cover the cost of after-school care. School ends at 2:30 and parents' jobs usually end at 5:00, then you have to drive to pick up your kid by 6:00. When I was married I had the luxury of being a stay-at-home mom. As a divorced mom I needed to go to work to survive and my access to income was what I could bring in myself, less the measly amount my ex paid for child care. Please don't knock the state as an enforcer. I was a fool and believed my ex when he asked to pay me directly instead of through the state. He still owes me for 6 years of support and I couldn't get a single penny out of him. When I tried to sue for back payments my attorney told me it would cost more in court costs than what he owed.
These are some of the devastating effects of divorces, and I am not saying this to shame you about the situation,it’s a general statement.
After a divorce the parents go to “move on” and separate quite a bit, but….they created a family. And divorce or no divorce, they still need to juggle that family. Together.
Living so far apart really throws a wrench in that, and that’s a super common situation.
I’m so sorry for all that happening to your family.
And though you’ve perhaps had a different situation, the OP has a point that men get pushed out and taken advantage of quite a bit in family court.
@@RedCurlyQ1 - Thank you. It was very difficult.
I would love more of this sort of conversation! Would you consider interviewing Kimberly Ells? She has an amazing book called Invincible Family. She would have so many amazing things to add to this conversation!
I have had contact with Kimberly.
Her book is fantastic!
@Erica, I love paid leave for mothers. BUT the difficulties with implementing something like that via mandate is very likely to result in less women being hired and certainly less pregnant women being hired. Larger companies have enough profit to offer their employees that benefit. But for a company with less than 50 employees, paid leave may well destroy the entire business. It cannot be one size fits all for paid leave. Because money doesn't grow on trees.
This was great. Thanks to both of you ❤
THE HAND THAT ROCKS THE CRADLE RULES THE WORLD.❤❤❤
Incredible interview, Greg and Erica! Thanks to you both!
Much appreciated!
Erica, your insights were so enlightening and powerful. I wish I knew these things as a new father. Awesome show today Greg!
I love the thoughts that were shared today. Thank you for introducing us to Erica.
I think she'll be back.
Very good interview, glad you introduced us to Erica' s insights. Such true comments.
Glad you enjoyed it!
Love this!! Incredibly important facts presented here. Yes, our culture is extremely skewed when it comes to how we raise our children.
Fantastic interview, thank you!
You're welcome!
I think the man in the home (or just involved with the kids mainly) is a good balance for the ‘helicopter’ parenting. I feel like with my 4 kids, I’m the one who is letting and promoting the kids to stretch out so to speak in the world. I feel like I’m also having to help my wife see benefits from it too. I think this is the yinyang effect of parenting
Thank you
Amazing clip! Thank you thank you thank you
Glad you enjoyed it!
I have a very hard time listening to this. It's heartbreaking.
Everyone needs to watch this!!!
It was a fascinating discussion with hopeful solutions.
Glad to hear!
I just went to a training that Big Ocean Women did, and it was so good.
I've often wondered why we have nurseries at church. Leaving a crying child with strangers for an hour.. (used to be 2) that's not enough time to get to know these "strangers". I wonder if it damages the child's security in this situation.
I just feel like it's so wrong to do that to the child.
But people also pierce their baby girls ears. Give them pain for glamor. Don't tell me it doesn't hurt them. I worked in a mall next to clairs, and I heard babies screaming all day long. It's child abuse in my eyes.
Following the ways of society.
I am enjoying this interview for the most part. There are a couple areas I disagree with. 1) No quotas of any kind. Meritocracy is an important part of a free society.
2)A year of paid leave for a mother is unsustainable in a capitalist economy. Taxes are high enough already.
This lady is dead-on. We’ve taken at least 4 parenting classes in the last year some effective strategies and some less so. What she says is true!
If we didn't get adequate bonding in our infancy, I believe we can attain to that level of bonding with Christ when we become like little children. That gives us the ultimate resiliency.
Carolina Allen, Big Ocean Women and their slogan and tenets are so impressive! Love this group.
Speaking about babies, when she mentioned people trying to to pay rent, I have found that following the baby steps (financial) has been the most beneficial financially sound decision ever made. Latter-day saints need to adhere closely to the baby steps which echos many of the financial guidance taught by the prophets and leaders. Avoid debt at all costs, budget, save, live below your means, tithe, and give generously. Seriously it would be great to compare all financial teachings of the prophets to the baby steps and take them seriously.
Baby steps are great. But low income that even without debt and no dumb financial decisions is tough to overcome. Not all men are lawyers, doctors, entrepreneurs or rainmaker$. I made decent money four years ago, even with raises what I make right now can’t afford the coming rent increases and no way will i ever be able to afford a house now.
@@dcarts5616 do you adhere to a strict zero based budget, every month, and review it with your spouse at least weekly (if you have a spouse)? Do you use credit cards?
@@budgillett no credit cards. No debt, other than one low car payment -$250. And yes. Crazy stuff.
@@dcarts5616 I too have no credit cards. Haven't for years, I quit that filth long ago. It makes a huge difference. I also have no debt, truly no debt, I don't have a car payment and I will never do a car payment. I'm sorry you do.
To clarify, when you say "and yes. Crazy stuff" is that in response to you doing a zero based budget every month and reviewing it with your spouse if you have one? I mean actually doing the budget and sticking to it without decision.
Sticking to it without deviation is what I mean.
Thanks!
You’re welcome. And thank you!
Wow, that stuff about fathers and their relationships with daughters hit home with me. I was fortunate to have both parents growing up. I was blessed that my mom was home with us kids until we were in school. We were dressed and fed and safe and the bills were always paid. But, I had no relationship with my dad. He was in the Air Force and gone for periods of time when I was very young. And when he was around, he seemed tense, stressed, and angry. I didn't like him. I was a little afraid of him. And maybe a little disappointed. He was not abusive at all, and I know he loved and cared about me, but I did not feel close to him at all. I don't remember playing, cuddling, or being carried by him. He just didn't know what to do with me, how to parent a daughter. He let my mom do that. I was on a pedestal instead of in his life. And it affected me, how I felt about myself.
Paid leave is a bandaid. We’ve been doing it for decades - it’s called welfare. How has that worked out? It hasn’t. We have only encouraged single motherhood and fatherless children. We have spent literal trillions. Society needs morals. Society needs good men. Good women. Society needs God.
Thanks for this episode. I have heard Erica Komisar interviewed someplace else and loved her speaking truth. Our world needs more truth and honesty.
When you were discussing the low numbers of boys compared to girls receiving awards or going to college, it immediately made me think if the temple. I don't know if it's just my area or if its common, but there is always double the amount of women at an endowment session than there are men. What's up with that? I have some theories and first hand experience with my own husband.
It's not "always" double the number of women. Anecdotes are not evidence of a trend. The sessions I attend, which are generally in the evening, are usually pretty evenly split. Though that doesn't prove anything, either.
AMEN!
We’ve all been test subjects for the past 50+ years!! I don’t know if all this indoctrination can be reversed so we have a more normal society!!!
There is a difference between women’s rights and feminism!
Instead of paid leave a stay at home tax incentive or increased access to resources would be more effective. I’ve heard very good arguments of why mandatory paid leave is bad for women because it disincentives companies from hiring them in the first place. It’s also not really fair to the companies, honestly. But since healthy brains is good for everyone there is a decent argument that it might be fair to spread that burden through taxes in exchange for the benefit of living in a healthier society (which would probably pay us back for that investment with a better economy), but individual companies cannot necessarily carry that burden alone and we should be honest that even through taxes/entitlements that it is a sacrifice (cost) that would be paid by taxpayers.
Greg, you want to know why academia is the way it is? Seek out Glen Kimber's doctoral dissertation. Very insightful.
35:10 this is a little bit of a contradiction here. Because if girls learn differently than boys and girls can sit in circle time, much better than boys, shouldn’t we be separating them? Or rather have two classes put together that are smaller and one is a male teacher that teaches the boys and one is a female teacher that teaches the girls.
I had similar thoughts
There is a great book called Why Gender Matters that discusses physical differences in the genders and how those differences impact their educational experience.
I noticed that even though I was ignorant of many of the differences, I tend to make adjustments in my parenting that matched what he was suggesting. As a homeschooler, my kids were able to have an environment that mostly matched their unique needs, especially in their early years.
This has taught me a whole lot about both my own childhood and development and that of my siblings, wife and son.
On the subject of paid leave, stay at home moms used to be the norm before the advent of big, socialist government during WWII. Around that time is when women started to move into the workforce in large numbers and the era of big government and big taxes began. I don't know that using another socialistic government program to fix a problem created by the same type of government will succeed.
Erica is expressing and explaining so many, many fantastic insights. If only she hadn't used the horribly mistaken term, "evolutionary". There is nothing that is evolutionary, because there is no evolution in the sense that the world uses it.
I'm 25 and I been called a bitch boy its been going for a long time guys
There’s something else going on. The fact that average testosterone levels and birth rate are half of what they were 50 years ago is not insignificant. I’m sure culture is a factor to feminization and the rise in LGBT youth, but there’s something else significantly contributing on a hormonal level.
Any guesses?
@@benlomond8055 I’ve watched a couple of videos on endocrine disrupters that are pretty convincing. Basically there are a lot of plastics, chemicals, and fragrances that leach into our food, drinks, and skin that look like estrogen to our bodies and this messes with natural hormone production. Women exposed to these while pregnant can have a permanent hormonal impact on offspring. It seems like this is well established in research but too disruptive for the economy to address, so no one is doing anything about it. Personally, I think it’s a BIG problem and a major contributor to the rise in LGBT prevalence, especially amount men.
Some theories are chemicals in plastics and a more sedentary workforce.
We don't need paid leave. Forcing companies to pay women to be home will lower ALL workers' paychecks. Instead, the government should exempt married parents who have a stay-at-home parent from taxes if they have a child under 5 years old.
Isaiah 3:1-14 all you need to know.
Interesting conversation and theories, but how do you explain the success of Israeli children who are raised in kibbutz’s.
I am a conservative woman and fully support paid leave. I can't afford to pay what I am being forced to pay for taxes. To pay for this we would need to change a lot of things, socially and politically. Promote marriage. Elect pro family/anti military industrial complex politicians.
How does it work if we're already over taxed? Where does the money come from?
Amen! You can read about what this woman is talking about in the book, The Nurture Revolution: Grow Your Baby's Brain and Transform Their Mental Health through the Art of Nurtured Parenting by Greer Kirshenbaum, PhD PhD.
We have failed as a people if we think government is the answer. She lost me at a legal mandate for paid leave.
She's coming off as socially conservative, but financially socialist. I'm a conservative who does not agree government should pay women to stay home with children. Government shouldn't force private employers to pay employees who choose motherhood to stay home for a year.
There HAS to be a better option. However, it can't be spoken because the truth is unacceptable.
...but if we do start paying women to stay home with babies, it would be a top priority and there are 100s of programs that should be cut to make it happen.
There are tax breaks/credit for daycare, so at the very least, we should offer that to households with stay at home mothers.
@@JessicaOrban3606 When I quit my job for our first baby, my husband and I learned that we would be able to receive a tax benefit against all costs associated with child care _if_ I continued working professionally and we hired a nanny or put our priceless child in daycare. But if I quit to take care of him(or even “hired” a relative)? Nothing. We were financially incentivized to put our baby into institutional care so that I could continue being a cog in the economic machine. That was 15 years ago and I do not think our legal system has turned toward helping mothers be there.
Thomas Sowell touches on this. He's written several books that have excerpts on CZcams. You'd probably like him if you don't know him already.
@@lizh7777 yes! He puts things so-well! 😁
Where did the education system go wrong? John Dewey in the progressive era. You know, the guy who brought the Frankfurt School to Columbia University; that guy. The modern approach to education can be traced mostly back to him.
Wish all women had the wisdom this woman has. The world would sure be better.
Academic ?? It's the money..its about the money...money
The pendulum always swings too far!
Very true. Both ways.
No to paid leave. It's no one's job or responsibility to pay mothers to stay home with the kids. It's a family sacrifice, which no one seems willing to make anymore.
My wife stayed home with the kids. On an airman salary. I often took a second job. We did without for the sake of our children. Why isn't that discussed anymore?
Oh yeah, fathers are necessary.
Exactly.
Paid leave is a solution to the problem created by other 'solutions' which continues the ratchet of more problems which will DEMAND - yes, demand new 'solutions' which will cause new problems...etc., etc., ...
She talks about other avenues besides college/universities for education and then claims we need to equalize the attendance to both genders at college.
Both can be done.
Why do we have the academic system we have? I disagree with your guest. Things are more competitive --that's true enough. But US schools are what they are because parents have abdicated their responsibilities. Beguiled by 'experts' with lots of alphabet soup after their names, parents have allowed others to take charge of education. As if some disinterested bureaucrat in the state (or worse, national) capital could ever be half so invested in your child's success as you, the parent, are. But the bureaucrat is permitted to call the shots --and they're on the take, in bed with big testing corporations and who knows who else. But every fall, parents dutifully send their kids away. And heave a sigh of relief. And on long vacations, you can bet that those parents will be on social media, whining about their kids. "I can't *wait* till they go back to school." If I had a nickle for every time I've heard that, I'd be a much wealthier woman.
Schools are what they are because parents permit it. And parents allow themselves to be stripped of their Agency, their power to act in their role as educator of their children, because it is easier. More convenient. And they salve their conscience with big houses, fancy vacations, expensive "opportunities". But what kids *really* need is Mom and Dad.
As Pres. Uchtdorf said, to kids, love is spelled T-I-M-E.
GONE OF THE RAILS!!!
While I enjoy her research, I do disagree with her prescription. Giving women paid leave will not help them cleave unto their husband and Heavenly Father.
Before I get blasted, this is just my opinion based on my family. I have always worked low paying jobs to be around children (40-50k per year). My wife wanted to stay home with our 5 children and we have not only done it, but still have the mini van, car and house that we own. It has been difficult, but our children are doing so well. Heavenly father has always provided what we need.
While I very much like what shes saying, it's clear her feminist leanings are preventing her from seeing how its the exaltation of choice that blends the sexes and ultimately the ideology that men and women are no longer complimentary.
Take your son fishing
Children are not the future. A.I. is the future.
try to be less sloppy w/ the language
... its "working OUTSIDE the home" or
"part-time mothering" rather than
the anti-family terms/phrases
Dude! Loved this episode! Great parenting insights.