The Highly Sensitive Male
Vložit
- čas přidán 11. 09. 2024
- In this episode, we discuss the the good, the bad, and ugly side of being a highly sensitive male in the modern world. Also, I review traits specific to HSP males, give tips for greater self-acceptance, and give strategies for dating and staying out of the dreaded "friend zone"
The Challenges of the Highly Sensitive Man
healdove.com/m...
The Rationale Male: Rollo Tomassi
www.amazon.com...
No More Mr Nice Guy: Robert A. Glover
www.amazon.com...
As an HSP woman, I have to tell you that the most intriguing, deep thinking, creative minded, complex, authentic and therefore, emotionally "strong" men (in my eyes) are the HSP men. Therefore, you are ultimately more attractive because you touch us deeper, we relate to you and you understand us. I have empathy and understanding for any HSP man going through any type of neurotic episode, but it is ultimately an intriguing thing because we go through the same thing, too, and we can relate and by course of just interacting, we heal one another. Also, with you guys, there is a talent, an honesty and deep thought mechanisms behind everything that is way more intriguing than any "slick" but ultimately dense minded guy. HSP women, (including myself as an INFP), do get hit on a lot, as we are like walking targets for the alpha males to try to impress us with what feels like shallow facades and a lack of comprehension in our eyes... and we can even get exploited by them, which is a horrible, demeaning experience. I just wanted to put a female perspective out there. For HSP men, you have the depth, you have the intrigue, you have your creative, philosophical, empathic natures which tell us ultimately that underneath your potential outer stuffering, that you have the deep inspiration, sight, cognition and inner chemistry that will ultimately attract the equal type of woman to you. Does this make any sense? I would not try to attempt taking on any alpha male traits, but instead go inward, do a lot of introspective writing, get a fire burning within you for whatever creative talents you have and take that out into the "normal" albeit scary, world, but in the long run and possibly even immediately, that will make you way more attractive and to the right type of woman, for I am assuming that you would prefer to have a richer, deeper more connected life with an HSP female as your best friend/ partner/ lover over the females who don't fully comprehend your depths or your gifts??? Does this make any sense? I wish you all the best. You are the most beautiful.
I love this comment! :-)
Thank you so much Orchids! I've been thinking about worrying about this for years. How could a nervous guy like me get any love in the dating world that demands, like he said, confidence and fearlessness? I felt, for a long time, like love was for other people. Hearing your sentiments really helped me see how guys like us can be lovable. Thanks for your support!
Orchids Rising I just want to say thank you for writing this.
Perfectly explained. I second this, as another HSP women.
💜💜
I'd rather end up in the friend zone than act fake. Some good girl will like me for who I am, I don't have to act.
Dope video. The thing that makes HSP so difficult is you basically have to get punished all through your adolescence, teens, 20s, until you start to learn about what’s going on. It’s tough to fight when you don’t know where the punches are coming from
Some of the best philosophic conversations I have ever had have been with hsp males. Keep in mind your not broken just deeper thinkers. 😘
Thank You Lori
Women are SUPER Freaking Amazing and FASCINATING Steve 💞❣👌
That's REALLY funny Man... 'Shit Testing'😅, but it's So True!
Was that a compliment?
Lori this is a true statement....We are the deep thinkers and thoughtful people.
In a competitive society this is what you get. Constantly judged ,evaluated,measured...Some people just can't fit in and it's okay.
That's been the hardest thing to realize for me my entire life. It's very difficult to accept but I agree.
I think that many quiet omega/sigma males are often highly sensitive alphas. We become aggressive just in case of self-defense. We'd rather enjoy solitary activities. We don't care being number 1, we just do ourselves...
Finally a hsp video I can relate to unlike the other highly sensitive videos that only focus on being a special snowflake or something. Love the real sensible down to earth advice for sensitive men. Totally agree with the masking part. Keep up the good work on these podcasts they are so relatable.
Thanks Anselm, welcome to the HSP fam!!
yea other hsp videos especially for men make us feel gay & don't say anything of value
Anselm Tam snowflakes annoy me
@@TheHSPExperience hi Steve! Love your channel! Would you like to be a guest speaker at my monthly HSP meetup here in LA? Let me know! We’d love to have you
@@CreativeForces1 He Lee, sure, contact me here and we can coordinate.. 😀www.thehspexperience.com/contact.html
HSP males face pretty much every problem in the east too.
As an HSP man from India, I have been accused of having no personality, being too shy and quiet and bullied for being sensitive
I can totally relate! Thanks for the comment.. :-)
Hey brother, whether I'm truly HSP or not, I understand how male culture can be tough on you when you're younger. I was born white in the United States yet, I was still bullied for being sensitive and shy, just like you. I hope you have found ways to use your sensitivity to strengthen yourself. Be you and people will love you, I promise. Stay sensitive and stay strong.
Whenever a guy has told me I’m ‘too good/nice’ for them it’s always turned out to be true. Now I believe anyone who tells me this and am more than happy to keep them in my friend zone or remove them from my life completely if I don’t feel good being around them
Often narcistic peopledo that, that they actually tell you the trueth little by little, so that you can never they they didn‘t tell you. They make you walk into the trap even though you know it’s your end.
I need to add something to the nice guy part since I'm also a HSP male. I actually taught myself the art of how to pick up women because I always got in the friendzone. What I realized is every personality type has its advantages and disadvantages. What I realized with our HSP type is that if we can be just a little bit more edgy and unapologetic in a funny, self-amused way, we will have much more success with the other gender. Since I'm HSP I can always feel how she feels and make her comfortable in any situation, which other guys can't do. So I guess we need to be proud of our strength and display that + working on our edgyness, at least that's what I realized so far. :)
I agree... that's why I made the "Nice Guy Syndrome" video. We can be too nice, to the point of being "pushovers" because we tend to be so conflict avoidant. Standing up for ourselves and being a little edgy (and unapologetic) is a good thing for HSPs. Thanks for the comment!
The HSP Experience No worries. Thank you for the video! I will check out your nice guy video then. Have a great day!
I'm an HSP and been dating an HSP man. I adore him. I love his care and thoughtfulness. Best guy I've ever met
Really glad I found this video today. I'm 27 and been struggling with relationships since highschool. Always felt shame and like a burden to my parters because of my sensitivity. I get a lot of compliments on my looks and easily attract girls in the beginning, and they almost always like the fact that I'm caring, sensitive and loving etc but usually with time a lot of my insecurities comes out and my sensitivity becomes a negative. I'm having a hard time overcoming past traumas and even though I love my sensitive nature and don't want to change it and really find someone who likes that part of me, I'm not sure how to get rid of these past traumas and insecurities. It's like I'm so used to them they are a part of me...
I know what you mean. Still working at my past traumas at 41
There is definitely a connection between people who perform doo doo tests and people who are at a minimum "toxic" and at a maximum have a personality disorder. HSP's are notorious for being magnets for "toxic" people including narcissists, sociopaths, or psychopaths. Any person who "tests" another person in this manner enjoys games and drama and it is not a person I would allow in my life. This is also the reason why many woman go from "really nice" to you know what so fast when they encounter a man who can see through their immature games. Of course there are guys who play the same immature games and yes they are usually the ones who put up an amazing image which is just an illusion.
Wow just perfectly explained. I would even go as far as to say that only toxic people, bullies or controlling people make doo doo tests. In my observation normal people usually dont do shit tests they judge characters merely by observation.
I have to disagree with you, and I don't believe it's a healthy mindset to navigate a world where 80% of the people are not sensitive. I'll copy and paste something I wrote in another comment:
'Regarding dating I've found that seeing shit tests as opportunities for fun is a great way to pass them. I'm from a country where we shit test people, a lot, all the time, and when I was a kid this was really difficult for me because I would take them seriously. But when I grew up I realized that, in Venezuela, it's our way to connect and have fun with one another, so I noticed that people here would Agree and Amplify instinctively and with an attitude of "having fun," and after internalizing that mindset I've become inmune to them. They are not even "tests" but opportunities for fun. When you said "where did you get that watch, Walmart?" I laughed so hard and thought "actually, Walgreens."'
Male HSP and proud of it! I finally found a way to express myself through my CZcams-Craft. Thanks for sharing! I really enjoy your videos :)
I so can related to the knowing something is up in an environment. I called it my Spider-Man senses. I can immediately pick up the “vibes” in a group, meeting, etc. I just realised I’m HSP today, and I’m 47 yo, imagine what I’ve been through my whole life being bullied, isolated and alienated just because I have these “powers”
"If you're not lifting, you're not even trying." lolllll.
Finally a man talking sincerely about his experiences as an HSP. I really appreciate this video blog entry, and subscribed.
Thank you for posting this! I am attracted to HSP men, and just learning about this myself, it's super useful to hear about it from the guy's standpoint.
Thanks for the comment. HSPs guys can kind of be "invisible" to most women, and it's not so much because they always lack confidence, but sometimes they are simply too polite to approach a women. They'll just leave her alone to shop, workout, or whatever, and they miss an opportunity (or seem disinterested). If you want to attract more HSP men, simply increase your IOIs (Indicators of Interest). HSPs guys (including myself) can be blind to subtle IOIs from women. For example, if you are somewhere, and just glance at a non-HSP man, he'll probably immediately walk over and say "hi". Whereas, with an HSP man, you'll have to catch eyes several times, or even walk over and start a conversation, and indicating that it wouldn't be "rude" to start talking to you. For example, there have been many times I have talked to women at an event/party, and the next day my friends will tell me, "That one woman was totally into you!" ...and I'd be like "really? I had no idea". Most non-HSP guys know this, but many HSP guys don't because nobody ever showed them, or they are trying to be polite. Many times, greater IOI from a woman will give HSP men courage to approach.
I have no trouble attracting them. It's just hard, because I'm an HSP myself! Will it be a terribly perfect storm or endlessly beachy waves and happiness? So far, it's been an unsatisfying in-between. Thanks for the prompt reply!
HSP/HSP relationships are not a panacea, in my experience. Communication tends to be pretty good, but I find a lot still matters on how self-aware each person is, and have they worked through their childhood issues, etc. I tend have the best conversations with HSPs. The thing I do (sort of) like, is that when your HSP partner over communicates, or gets a little sulky over something seemingly innocuous, I recognize it, or withdraws/needs validation... it's like looking in a mirror. I'll think "she's being so HSP right now".. LOL!! I get the other person's behavior better (because I am similar), but the behavior can still be annoying, etc. I think the biggest trap two HSPs (especially introverts) can fall into is complacency/lack of excitement. Someone needs to keep things fun and interesting... That is why many HSPs get with non-HSPs, because the non-HSP (especially extroverts) will just take the HSP along for the ride! However, I would rather be with an HSP than a non-HSP because they get me and I can by my truest self around them. Again, the key is that all parties are self-aware and working on their issues.
Hey Hey, I've just discovered I'm INFP, with possibly some bits of INFJ. Always knew I was HSP, never bothered me. As I was growing up, my Mum never let me forget it. I've always owned it. I like your stories, really resonate. I could go to a bucks (stag) night or a strip club, then forced into a lap dance, and end up in the corner with the stripper, talking about how she got to where she is. HSP has always been good to me, easy to meet girls and make conversation with them. It's knowing when to change from conversation to wooing I think. Just need to know before you go into it, what you want from it. Then leave them wanting more. Say just enough, but keep the mystery. To some females it's very attractive. You can have the reverse problem, where you just wanted to make conversation, and understand them, and you accidentally give them the impression that you want to go out with them. So you have to be careful to tone it down on occasion. I don't let the Alfa's get to me. I've always felt stronger than them. I never let peer group pressure decide for me. I know who I am and what I want. Mates will hang crap on me for being HSP. And not just HSP, but my unconventional lifestyle in general. I tend to where it as a bag of honour. Not that my mates would see it as HSP. More as different, strange, weird, unusual. But they are still my mates.
You mentioned no father figure. That hits home. My Dad died when I was about 8, I survived, maybe struggled here and there. I was fairly resilient though. I think I was lucky growing up on a farm, and had no choice but to hunt, kill livestock, fish. Team sport was football, closest thing to individual sport, would be tennis, water skiing or shooting. I had to work with machinery. I became a Mechanic, Elevator Engineer. Welder, Plumber. But I was always dreaming of a bigger World with other things out there for me. I guess that my outlet was music as I formed a band with a few mates, which led to my escape. Which I thank The Beatles for, who I heard on 1 of my Mum's records when I was about 5. Hooked for life. Don't get me wrong though, I did love that life. It all put me in good stead for the Non HSP World I think. The only times being HSP would be a problem, is when all my mates girlfriends would spend to much time talking to me. Like you said about tending to have more female friends. That was true, I've probably evened it out more now though. In a smaller country town, and back from boarding school. Girls where like a whole new World to be discovered for me. And for the girls, it was like who's this new kid on the block, that seems to not be such a redneck blockhead, that can relate to us and hold conversation. I look back and laugh now, knowing this is why I've always felt different. I'm thinking of the times I'd go out hunting with mates, in my late teens and early 20's. What was the bit I enjoyed about it? It was driving with a mate out into the bush for a weekend, talking about life so far. What do you think is out there in the dark? Talking about Ghost stories, space, time, women. And all those other things are hard to understand. No plan, just catch wild boar and bring em back to get paid. No T.V. out camping, so we had to talk. And out there I was more free to talk about whatever I wanted. Not just the small town, small talk. It was about the journey, the company, the conversation and adventure.
Thanks for the vid. Pretty helpful as I'm not having a good day. I'm an HSP and have been married to a great woman for 21 years. You talk about being "friend-zoned" a bit, but I wouldn't sweat it. Being "best friends" is almost exclusively what makes a marriage survive. Good open communication is completely vital to a healthy relationship. We HSP's actually have a leg up with this, so while it may not be that great while dating, it's certainly helpful during marriage.
Hi Frank, thanks for the comment. Being "best friends" with a wife is always a good thing, but when I discuss being "friend-zoned", I am referring to the dynamic where a guy wants to be "more than friends" (i.e. friends AND lovers), but she just keeps him "friend zoned". If a guys wants to just "be friends", that's cool, but it's not typical, especially if he is sexually attracted to her. Many HSP guys can be sort of "beta" in this regard as they will can just hang around a woman they are attracted to and simply "orbit". I have been in this situation many times.
I've literally talk on the phone, for hours, to women friends tell my about all the problems they are having with their "jerk" alpha male boyfriends, while I listen and offer kind words. No thanks!... that's what girlfriends are for. LOL! I will still do that on rare occasions, if she truly is "just a friend". ...but being an orbiter "beta" male in some woman's guy-harem is merely an ego boost for her, while there is nothing in it for me.
The marriage dynamic is different in that there really isn't a friend zone, since you've already hooked up and are having sex. Again, I am only talking about trying to hook up with a woman you are sexually attracted to and just getting "stuck" for months in the friend zone. One the best descriptions of this phenomenon is from CultOfDusty here (Warning: foul language, NSFW)
czcams.com/video/h1SOx2ePySY/video.html
I hope your day gets better. Hang in there man.
Thanks! Yeah, I get where you're coming from. I guess my point was that once you're over the hurdle of the friendzone, those listening skills will come in handy. Wine helps.
Agreed. HSP males are typically great listeners, and we tend get along with women very well. Thus, we end up friend-zone more than non-HSPs. ...yeah, and wine does help.. LOL!
never mind my icon, not my account.. i'm male hsp and your comment is awesome. I got friendzoned half my life untill now i understand most of those women were actually narcissistic and even psychopathic... A.S.P.. Lol. Great to come across a soldier in the trenches. I don't let them get that far with me anymore. Horrible the way they smell people like us and approach us as you say with the bullshit about their Alpha males. Keep it up sport as i will !!!!
Black/Male/INFJ/HSP. Let’s just say it was very, very challenging growing up! And most of my adult life too! Great to see a male talk about some of the challenges we go through until we realize that there is no better feeling/power than accepting who we are and “running” with it! I have always desired to share my gifts with someone who could appreciate them but unfortunately, like many of do, have only had toxic relationships. I love experiencing things on a deeper level! I love authenticity! I’ve always felt like the other person was missing out on life! Thanks for sharing! And from one HSP male to another…..I love you man! 😊
Black/26 Male/INFP/HSP I just wanted to reach out and tell you I understand your unique perspective in life. My entire life I was told I was not a real man in society’s standard so I went through a personal journey to understand what true masculinity is. Still haven’t had a healthy relationship (only had one girlfriend in high school lol) the only thing I can say is keep pushing forward if you haven’t found what your purpose is in life seek it out pour your whole being into it. I’m proud of you and love your brother hang in there!
The part about the friend zone - I feel that hard. Recently I was at a music festival and met a really cool girl, bonded really hard, really deep conversation. Then a typical alpha male came, and before I knew it they were full on making out in front of me and I realized I was friend zoned. Its difficult to describe how much that hurts to people who are not HSP's. Thank you for the video!
So true about the 20 second cry for healthy release, makes me feel so much better.
...yep... just embrace "the cry" LOL!!
Being a crybaby is my best contraceptive.
I'm glad I found this video, I think this is the first time I see another HSP Male who's this similar to me. Thank you for this video.
I would say programming is an amazing activity for HSP, I've noticed I love it because I can do it alone and at my own pace; its stimuli is subtle: I slowly work towards a goal (and feeling nice about the sense of progress); I don't have to talk to anyone to do it, so I can even listen to my favorite music while at it; it's so engaging it keeps my brain from ruminating, and honestly much more things. Programming is the "painting a landscape" or "sculpting a masterpiece" for us HSP nerds.
Regarding dating I've found that seeing shit tests as opportunities for fun is a great way to pass them. I'm from a country where we shit test people, a lot, all the time, and when I was a kid this was really difficult for me because I would take them seriously. But when I grew up I realized that, in Venezuela, it's our way to connect and have fun with one another, so I noticed that people here would Agree and Amplify instinctively and with an attitude of "having fun," and after internalizing that mindset I've become inmune to them. They are not even "tests" but opportunities for fun. When you said "where did you get that watch, Walmart?" I laughed so hard and thought "actually, Walgreens."
I really appreciate this video, there are some things I found really helpful and they make me hopeful to find a way to live a very rich life with this trait.
Also, I would say some HSP "ladykillers" would be Don Juan, Pablo Neruda, poets and any person who gives the impression that they can feel deeply about you but that have some mischievousness in them. You have probably already read this book but The Art of Seduction is a really good book about the different archetypes of "heartbreakers" in history, and the book invites you to find and adapt the archetype that fits your personality the best. I think this is very important for us since sexuality is instrumental for our satisfaction and self-perception, besides one of the key components of having a rich life, at least in my opinion.
Thanks again for your video, I will definitely check more of your channel.
This is excellent! So interesting getting your perspective, as I'm a HSP woman. I agree with you, first date in a coffee shop or art gallery!! So true LOL
This is me in a nutshell, I always felt different than the average male, I had a more feminine vibe about me, I'm not assertive, brash, tough, I'm more meek, easygoing, shy, friendly, softspoken.
I was okayish at sports, but I never truly cared for them. I was often shamed for crying and being sensitive as a male growing up. I also tend to have more female than male friends, and I somehow tend to bond well with women over men. I always felt like I couldn't relate to most "Alpha guys". I tend to do well with women in places where I thrive in. For dates I'd prefer the pub, nice restaurant, coffee shop, bowling etc, rather than a nightclub. I've learned to develop an assertive side to me, it's still ongoing, but with time and practice it will get better.
I've dated some girls, but some girls have said that im too "nice" and too "sensitive" for them.
To hell with traditional gender norms, we are not in the 1950s anymore, eff having to be this tough emotionless alpha dude.
your video is underrated. need more ppl watching it and subscribed!
Finally I found an awesome video I was looking for, man thank you! I'm definitely a HSP woman aka empath, and go through the same things you've discussed that HSP men deal with. The statistics were great as I didn't know the specific numbers of how many HSP there are, which helped me to understand better. After so many failed relationships with men who were narcissists with no sense of self, I realized that I'm a rare find and that I'm more compatible with HSP men, since we're the minority of human beings this makes sense why it's hard to find a great match. I actually desire an HSP male who embraces his gift of sensitivity a Gentle[man] soon I'll have a man like this in my life. I feel like we're unicorns lol! It's gonna take another unicorn to share life with me. I wish you the best and thank you for creating this. I understand much better now since this came from an HSP male personal perspective.
what kills me is that because I am genetically wired differently when compared to your friend who is popular with ladies, I have to live life that is non authentic cause I really would prefer to live life your friend lives.
Dear OP,
I took your advice to read The Rational Male. It is a complete game changer!! My life is forever changed for the better. Thanks so much!
Great video! Shout out to all the other HSP's out there
About your friendzone topic: I believe meditation, nofap and taoism are incredibly useful tools for the hsp person.
Meditation: Finding one's centre.
Energy Expansion: nofap
Taoism: Finding peace in all situations, via the 'Tao Te Ching' philosophies
Also, exercise and sometimes a bit of coffee.
Good points on the meditation/nofap... You are 100% correct. I'll mention that in one of my next episodes. I have to look into taoism.
The best thing about the Tao Te Ching (pronounced Dao De Jing) is you don't have to believe in a god or even a "universal force". You can modify it to suit an atheist/agnostic outlook by making (for example) nature and values your sacred things.
Thank you for this video. I have been searching for an understanding of why I think, behave, react, and express myself the way I do. I have been HSP my entire life.
Glad it was helpful!
We are highly intuitive and intelligent! 🙌
Thanks for the help. I can't believe it took me 52 years to learn this about myself. Anyway great work, even though you do look a little like Max Headroom. hahahah....
LOL! That's an old school reference! I had a friend in high school who called me that all that time... haha!
I can totally relate to that I even I don't understand myself before I knew I was HSP. I just need to cry. Some occasions I cried at our dinning table while munching my food. I would just tell my family that I'm totally fine I just need to cry. At first they felt like I was odd but then they just accept my ways of releasing my energy.
Yeessss... sometimes, it's just an energy release. ...and it feel so good. :-)
15:52 I can resonate with this whole-heartedly. As a child, I would cry a lot at certain things, and even now as I am entering adulthood I find myself getting emotional at things. I try my best to conceal this apparent trait of myself, as I am still self-conscious about this. I also do my best to stray away from romantic relationships, as I do have trust issues and I also wouldn't want to feel responsible for hurting anyone emotionally. I am still growing, so this opinion would most definitely be subject to change.
"Friend" is one of the most beautiful words and concepts in all of human existence. It has gotten a negative shading by people who erroneously see it as an inferior consolation-prize to another goal/intent. I'm reminded of a line in "Hitch" (Will Smith movie) where he tells another man that he, Hitch (Will's character) helps men who "actually LIKE" the women they want to attract.
Not all friends are, of course, romantically involved. But everyone who ARE romantically involved should also be friends.
Great presentation. I discovered I was HSP after being diagnosed with ADHD.. I wonder how many HSP have ADHD
That is a good question. I have run across a few videos and articles where people claim they are both. As for me, I am a huge procrastinator and daydreamer, but once I actually focus on something, I can stay focused. I think my greatest struggle is lack of discipline... LOL! Welcome to the channel!
Hey David, check out Penelope Lola.... She is HSP and ADD... I love her channel, and she is a cutie pie... I love her vibe. Hope this helps.
czcams.com/video/lOEFiiFEkZQ/video.html
Same here. I'm an (male adult) HSP introvert with ADHD. It's actually pretty common, not rare! The reason why people think they don't go together is because of a very stereotypical view of ADHD. The stereotypical view of a ADHD person seems to be a very extraverted socially impulsive person with a lot of external energy. The thing is, for those people they're symptoms show up more on the outside so other people actually notice it. For more introverted people with ADHD a lot of their symptoms are more focused internally, so people often don't notice them. Or they falsely assume that you must have ADD instead of ADHD.
ADD & ADHD symptoms are largely coused by a difference in how the 'dopamine reward system' works in the brain.
People with ADHD simply have a worst case than people with ADD. But it's still very personal how this effects a person when it comes to symptomes!
Personally i struggled a lot with: Focussing/concentrating, short-term memory, hyper-active brain, impulsive thoughts, addiction, always forgetting stuff and often coming to late. I have learned to be less impulsive in conversations though because i don't want people to think i'm rude..
Eventhough i can still sometimes abruptly cut people off in a coversation without realising it in the moment. When i do realise right after, i often apologise. Because i don't like to discomfort other people.
Anyway, for me having both HSP and ADHD feels like a constant tug of war. Sometimes the HSP side seems to be winning, and only second later it can be the other way around.
It's a interesting dynamic i guess. One that i'm only recently start to understand properly myself. :-)
Of the three types of HSM I was the "second" type until very recently. I tried so hard to push the HSM part of me down and only let is show privately... but am now coming out of my shell. My friends (not closest, but most) are always surprised to find out I am an INFP. I can act like an ENTJ on a dime, but it's exhausting. Woof! I will hopefully be able to embrace that third type soon!
You are also dead on about the lifting thing! LIFT! LIFT! LIFT! Get huge. Feels awesome.
I'm trying to get to the 3rd type too--where we are comfortable being our true selves, and there is so much power and confidence in that. Thanks for the feedback... hang in there!!
This is awesome....I'm a HSP woman and I think my man might be HSP but in denial. This was such a good explanation. Not sure if he will admit it but I will at least have him watch!
Oh man the "shit test" is something that is real and a real bullshit struggle. I don't know why but I just thought of this analogy for HSP men. You can throw water at a dull rock all day and nothing happens but if you throw water at a sand castle it dissolves quickly. Because of this fact a sand castle is more criticized for its short existence, its fragility under pressure but also admired for its beauty, the experience and the effort it took to build. What is interesting is how HSP men can literally fit in and do anything in any situation and lead very well BUT almost always for only a small amount of time because of the capacity of our minds to take on and handle the stress and the responsibilities we signed up for by assuming this leadership role. I think in my situation (which is probably more normal for HSP men than I ever assumed) I tend to find faults in everything I do and blame myself for never fitting in and being "a good bro" like 80% of other dudes I met. You are almost always your own worst enemy as a HSP man. Even as a child my HSP was so confusing - you are told to be kind and sensitive but FIGHT! Never take shit from anyone and always WIN. Nobody like a loser and nobody remembers 2nd place. you gotta have big muscles and look intimidating so people don;t mess with you and you need to "score" with as many women as you can to seem super cool to other dudes (and even women). I know this is media inspired bullshit but isn;t it sad how much that defined men here in America? This maybe just be a uniquely environmental cultural toxic masculine American ideal we have been force feed through media and distorted polarization that adds to a genetic predisposition of sensitivity and emotional overloading. I only recently learned of HSP and immediately knew I was. I had blamed depression, bipolar, social anxiety, etc. I think mental illnesses may stem from the CONSTANT cyclical misunderstandings you get from not loving yourself or blaming yourself for being too emotional, too deep, too worried in a society rewarding and glorifying confidence, domineering and aggression. I am quite feminine in thinking but very heterosexual inclinations - I just have an easier time talking and identifying with women than men. I find "most" women to be less judgmental and competitive. I totally get the "friend zone" comment. I was nothing but that in my younger days haha. My wife is Japanese and it's so interesting how her culture and upbringing has made her so much more resilient and mentally adaptable than I am. Great video thanks for sharing!!
Thanks you man. That was very helpful. You have answered so many questions that I was unable to find answers to for so long and that makes me feel much much better. That part on the "Shit Test" is so true! It always happen to me but I don't understand why people are doing it?!!!
You are just one lovely HSP guy! thanks so much for this video. My son is HSP, I am, my grandson is - finding out about it changed our lives, too, and we're learning all the time. This is so helpful. You are so honest and funny = thanks again.
Glad to have stumbled upon this gem ! I am an HSP woman and I have been dating my current boyfriend , who is also HSP , for 1 year . I don’t think he completely understood he was empath/HSP when we first met but we’ve had a lot of talks about it since then and he has definitely come to terms with it and recognizes that part about himself. He is a true alpha male , but doesn’t live his life as one - he’s a background player, soo chill but fun :) , not into a bunch of sports (he loves watching rugby though !) , big into fitness and the gym . IT guy - loves his electronics ! Dating an HSP is dating on a whole other level! Communication is always open with us because we can always sense how the other person is feeling . Even if we say “I’m okay” , we always respond with , “just tell me , I can feel _______ “ and it’s always accurate . My boyfriend is sensitive , he has cried , and I’ve never ridiculed him it (and never will) because I know that is what’s needed for him . Same for me . Some days can be hard , especially when neither of us have ever dated a HSP , and both being HSP gives another dynamic to our relationship. We are careful with each other. Because we are still learning each other and being aware and conscious of energies that we have picked up or exchanged throughout the day. And that’s important to us because we are always thinking of how the other person needs to be loved PRESENTLY. loving each other is different than our previous partners . It’s deeper , soul vibrations , exchanging of auras , it’s mind blowing! He is everything I never knew I could find . Such a gentleman and always loving me . Siiiighhh , HSP FOR THE WIN !! ALWAYS ! HSPs are sexy , I’ve known a handful of men that are HSP , they are so worth loving ! So NEVER OVERLOOK THE HSP MALE . They can give you so much more than you could ever pray for ♥️
Thanks Felecia.. your boyfriend sounds super cool.. I'm glad you found a sensitive alpha dude.. they're out there.. just hard to find! I agree.. being in a relationship with an HSP is the best... They're the deepest, most meaningful relationships most people will ever have. Take care!! :-)
Thanks for writing this @Felecia. Makes me have hope.
Having an HSP for a father is the best gift ever! Don’t underestimate the power of this trait, but make sure you get a little bit more downtime to recoup from this crazy, busy noisy world. Having fewer partners before age 30 is a very good thing. Better suited for a successful, long-term relationship statistically speaking.
Being an HSP myself i really like the theme of your channel. :-D. I recently started thinking of myself in terms of HSP. I hope to see more videos!! Have a great day
I love this relatable content.
The friend zone thing is a weird one...as a teenager I realized that if I acted like an arrogant prick I could get girls...but the subsequent relationship was a total nightmare...maybe identifying other HSPs is the key to relationship success?
Luke Skywalker was an HSP INFP. He doesn't fit the traditional masculine role, but he rather expands upon it. Zuko from Avatar: The Last Airbender is another one. Some real ones would be Andrew Garfield, George Lucas, Johnny Depp, Adam Driver. All of them are admirable people and have/had women who loved and admired them and saw their strength that many may not see especially Andrew Garfield's ENFJ girlfriend Emma Stone. So HS men, there are people who will love the traits you possess. You might as well embrace them and journey on the path to self love and self acceptance.
Funny how I acted tough back in the day, now that i know who im supposed to be, I feel like I have a purpose in this life.
We as highly sensitive people should strive for dealing with our fears and insecurities, after that you will enter an higher love which will let you see that every person makes descisions on how they have experienced life and that you will understand this person and love this person even if it is a macho ego person.
PS: don't feel sorry for yourself, I mean I understand that it is hard and i am here for you and so are many others, but when we start embracing who we are, we ll rise above ourselfes and make a postive change in this world, hsp'rs are the leaders of the future.
thank you for sharing your experience. this feels so validating to know another person goes through similar tribulations
truth and clarity to a lot of unanswered questions thanks
People feel I’m strange because they see me I prefer dark quiet places for some time then I share my life with them. They don’t really know that darkness and quietness help me to refocus again and feel better and complete my day well. However, as an HSP person, people think that I like to stay in a bookstore because I love reading but they do not know that I need shush this place to feel more comfortable.
I can relate 100%!!! :-)
This is eye opening. I never knew about the term HSP and I realize that I’m this person. Though because of my gym regiment and my music career, I have learned how to supersede my sensitivities. But my sensitivities make me very anxious and have usually betrayed me when least expected. I’ve gone to incredible lengths to ignore my sensitivity. But given this video, now I realize that I have to change course. I have to embrace it… And learn how to use it to my advantage. I truly appreciate your openness because this will change my life. Thank you for being authentic 🙏🏽
I cannot stand to see people being hurt in Horror movies even though these movies are just plain fictional. "I cannot watch these at all " "Cry with and hold your girlfriend , doesnt make a man whimpy but empathetic and understanding. 👍 We can write and read poetry to the woman we love and get that special connection.. About hunting and fishing ...if you take the animal and kill it ...you should prepare it up as a food source.
for some reason, i'm reminded of something funny i read once: "when she says go deeper but you say you've run out of poetry." 🤣 stay strong (and sensitive) my fellow hsp'ers 👊
If for nothing else... I love the lights! I have become a master at reading ppl and their moods and how body movement changes. Super empathetic.. but I can't shut off my masking of it in public. It really sucks.
Hey man, really appreciate you sharing your experiences and thoughts candidly as it’s nice to have those moments of connection like “hfs! Yes, exactly! You get me!!” As well as learn about resources that you have come across which I am still sifting through. So many of the HSP podcasts are very heavily women oriented, and while some of the central traits are common, there’s other gender specific situations you need to ask where I’ve struggled to find a community who shares my own experience. It’s so funny because my mom got me the “no more Mr. nice guy“ book before I even identified being an HSP, I read part of it, thinking after learning about they just be constructed that book was just an amalgamation of hsp with a totally different moniker. Now that I see you’ve advocated that book, I’ll pick it up and continue reading it as I totally put it aside after discovering my trait. Thanks again for your videos, and a huge huge huge appreciation for not throwing in some commercial sponsor announcements. They drive me bat sh crazy whenever I hear them. Raymour and Flanigan is never going to get my business like ever!!
I have experienced the 'shit test' many times but rarely sussed it out for what it really was. I can totally relate that I just never think that way so couldn't understand why people I just met were being arseholes, but it all makes sense now so thanks for that. I'll look into those books you recommended too.
I legit witnessed these new co worker I met yesterday do it like 6 times haha. Everything makes sense now.
I am HSP and female. What I ALWAYS knew for myself was, that I am different & that I am (in comparison to others) 'feel the moment the situation) . To me it was always clear that men who cry in my presence are 'the REAL person' as all the others were too insecure to admit to it. However, I never discouraged/ridiculed/looked down on a man who cried & showed his feelings. To me HSP's are the most desirable men, the most attractive (altough I got scolded that I had a wharped perception of beauty) but I can see into the HSP soul and that makes that person sooooo very attractive to me.
This video is such a gift. You are so brave for posting it and sharing your truth around it, especially in a culture of anti-sensitivity. That is strength. I'm still trying to get my head around all the terms and putting my truth into words but I feel there is such a misconception that being in touch with your emotional side and being to able to shepherd your inner feminine (which we all have) means having a feminine sexual essence or being 'less masculine'. Especially the idea that those exhibiting more alpha behaviour are automatically more masculine. I have had both hsp partners and non-hsp partners in the past, all of which have felt very masculine. They were the more rooted partner, they stayed in their integrity, and were more identified with consciousness and with truth (and with penetrating) whereas, as a the feminine essence, I was the one that was receptive, sensual, and yearning to be filled up with love. The fact that the hsp partner was able to cry with me did not make him more effeminate or less trustable as a man. It actually made him more trustable because by being able to shepherd his own inner feminine (a John Wineland term), I felt his sensitivity to, and acceptance of, my needs as a woman.
This is super helpful and insightful. I love my highly sensitive male and I'm trying to get better at it. Thank you!
Weightlifting and Jiu Jitsu always come to topic when it comes to self improvement.
As you already suspected we hsp males from europe do have the exact same problems. Of course it will be allways an aspect of culture, society and the individual itself, but the things youve pointed out fitting for 100% , at least for me and the hsp i talked to. thank you very much for your input. Greetings from germany :)
thanks for the video. i appreciated it! i only today heard the term hsp. -have been watching videos since then. it's literally been a Godsend. i have, throughout my life suffered with my condition. i NEVER supposed there was a genetic component to my condition. i can't tell you how relieved i am to completely identify with all the identifiers in hsp! thanks, again!
The book "highly sensitive men" by Falkenstein (copyright 2017), seems to be like "shyness&love" by Gilmartin written in the correct order.
"(...) there are two inborn components: one is the high emotionality (low anxiety threshold); the second component is inhibition/introversion. When a person is very high on both emotionality and introversion (...), the chances are exceedingly good within the context of American society that he will develop into a chronically love- shy individual."
"Highly sensitive men" starts with a real pshychological profile and then goes on to say "you know, these don't get laid very much". Which is in sharp contrast to shyness&love which start with the consequences and then goes on to generalize very easily misunderstood concepts:
"if you haven't gotten laid in x amount of time, it must mean you are pussy"
Which could explain why it is that other types of men who read this book, get aggressive ... and start shooting themselves and other people.
(Shyness&love is the book that you can find on incel forums. )
Like shyness&love also says, and Falkenstein also points at, it's very easy for highly sensitive men to play women (like in MMORPG's or open world games, like second life). It's actually quite shocking to find out women are into the same kind of activities. Like Gilmartin says:
"The nonassertive, unaggressive little boy will commonly develop non-masculine interest patterns. In essence, he violates traditional gender role expectations in terms of interests and preferences rather than in terms of either effeminacy or in terms of homosexuality or erotic orientation. For example, he will prefer quiet, non-physical forms of play; working with arts and crafts, music and theatre arts, dolls and figurines, etc., all of which relate in different ways to violation of gender role expectation."
As to the career of computer scientist as a left brained person. Computer science is also about languages.
I`ve to harden my heart from bullied at the age 65, still getting bullied. I could not change, it last only a few hrs, it made unhappy, I it was the grace of God thatmade me this way,I look at it as a blessing from God, which gives mea closer bond to God. my family came very close to tragic incidents that would put us n danger. but my sensitive also give DESERNMENT THAT SOMETHING NOT RIGHT and ascaped from it.Yes, I had a real bad childhood vey sad, my own mom bullied me my and I were alike, my mom helped put my dad n his grave.. So at my age I`m still going thru it and society now days really suk. Thnk you great video.
So I would say I'm in a "special" place right now that really tests my sensitivity. The mother of my child broke up with me over almost 11 months ago now. Actually the day after Christmas in 2017. She left me for a man with an English accent because it was new and exciting for her. The ultimate kicker is that we still live together. Why you might ask? Because we have a daughter together that I want absolutely zero time to be away from or split from. Also. Because I love her mother so deeply still. Even after only 5 months of being split up she left to "go see friends" where she actually left to meet this man for the first time and have sex. She came home two days later and hid a hickey from me that I ended seeing. That night I had a knife ready to dig into my wrists. But I thought of my two year old girl and how she needs her daddy. At that point it no longer was about how I loved her mother for being the reason of not kicking her out but because of my little girl. Every day is a battle for me. I don't love her mother that way anymore but I remember our life. You wouldn't believe my jealousy it gets set off so easily. She has tons of guy friends that she didn't have when we were together and I live in this constant state of fear that I will come home from work and not see her or my daughter. I cry daily. I hug pictures from when we were together that I have framed. I get set off and ask her to not be so hurtful and be more careful around me but she treats me like I'm too sensitive and dumb for feeling this way. But she doesn't understand how hard it is to want to stay alive. I just want a change but I can't be without my little girl. Who I'm rocking back to sleep as I type this
Hang in there man... we feel feelings so intensely. I was divorced 2 1/2 years ago and I have 11 year old daughter and we share custody. If I could not see my daughter... I would be suicidal as well.. I could give a shit about the marriage ending, but my daughter is everything. I feel ya.. Try getting some anti-depressant to get you through dark times. Things will be get better...
I've had go toughen up in many respects, especially when you only have yourself you need to be disciplined and stoic. Mostly people let me do what I do because they see it works out. I do get zoned a lot but I tend to keep others at arm's length too. I don't want to be in a chaotic situation.
Good stuff bro; I relate a lot.
I have always known that I am a male HSP intuitively but it was not until I read Elaine Aron's book "The Highly Sensitive Person" that I put a name to it. I am deeply grateful for that book.
Thank you for this podcast/video stream. It really means a lot. Keep up the great work, Steve!
Thumbs Up. Subscribed. Shared.
Thanks! I'll have another one up soon. I love doing them, and meeting other HSPs... My life has been so busy lately... stay tuned! :-)
Man, you are a life saver. thanks for this video
Just finished the rational male on your recommendation ... I wish I read it years ago!
Glad to hear it brother! I have an even better book recommendation. Contact me here and I'll send you the info. I don't want to post it publicly... LOL!!!
www.thehspexperience.com/contact.html
Other must reads:
The Way of the Superior Man
Penis Power
Any of Dr. Elaine Aron’s books on HSP’s especially The HSP in Love
I live in Mideastern Finland and i certainly have felt that the perception of men here are in favor of the stereotypically masculine male. A friend of mine lives in Helsinki (the capital of Finland) and i feel so much more accepted over there since Helsinki has always been alot more in touch with the more liberal values. I also have Aspergers Syndrome wich has something to do with my personality but i feel like the more pronounced symptoms have almost disappeared over the years. I dream of moving somewhere else often. For example in South Korea the gender role of a man is quite different compared to the west.
Have you also heard of semen retention? In my experience, it is the best way to become more confident and assertive without trying to fake it or reject who you are. I was still an introverted HSP, but I was much more confident and natural with myself, especially when it came to talking to women. Talking to them became almost effortless and it was almost like I was on autopilot, knoeing exactly how to hold a conversation with them. It's rumored to biologically build testosterone and releases pheromones. It makes sense biologically too. Your body does whatever it can to make itself more attractive the longer you go without sex or sexual gratification of any kind, male or female.
You are 100% correct... Check out this video relating to your point: czcams.com/video/TfD6Dm3u7KY/video.html
The HSP Experience That's exactly the way I felt. Most guys get friendzoned because they try to understand the girl and be compassionate, which is great, but there is a lack of physical touch so it comes off as friendly. With physical touch involved with the yearning to understand and show compassion, naturally you feel even more deeply bonded and on top of that the woman feels understood. If it's a highly sensitive woman she will feel you even more intensely! NoFap is the best way for me to embrace myself and be authentic while getting more in touch with my masculinity, since living authentically is so important for us INFPs. This video explains why HSP men can be so attractive, so don't ever think that you aren't. We are a rare gift to those who take the time to understand us.
czcams.com/video/S12zvIofV88/video.html
My thoughts - tinder and dating and approaching r stupid to begin with - most normal people dont even do it, anyway. Have a social network and you meet people organically. Also, basic stuff like going to the gym and wearing nice clothes will open up more females.
Concerning women, I think a lot of them aren't looking for an overthinking empathetic guy. From a biological standpoint, they seek safety, and a guy trying to empathize or overthink a truly dangerous person/situation is a liability. Talking too much or showing too much interest early on probably isn't helpful, unfortunately, lol
Crying to release energy. Love the reframe. It makes it okay.
Very influential thank you
I just can’t deal with my toxic coworkers on construction. I’m only 18 years old and these people ruin my life.
I suffer from depression.
I wish I just could man up
I just found out im hsp and this video helps me out loads thanks!!!
This video crossed my path at the right time. Everything happens for a reason. 🤜🤛 thanks bro
Spot on 100 percent bro
100% man keep up the good work i needed to hear this .
I think American culture has affected the way we see HSP men in the west. I think until very recently, being able to have an intelligent conversation with a man was more highly valued in Europe than being a dude-bro. What I mean is that men who enjoyed the arts were highly respected until quite recently. In Wales, where I'm from, we always held poets and harpists in high regard until probably the mid-1990s, and most of these people were men as well.
I agree. In Asia, HSP men tend to have a better experience as well. Being in HSP male in America is tough.. :-)
I think it should be seen as something good when a man embraces his sensitivity. Not that he becomes whiny and self-absorbed with it but that he's comfortable being sensitive as you said in your video. My dad is a HSP and has hidden in pretty well. My mum had no idea other than the fact that he's not very good at hiding the stimulation he gets from sensory input! When we're in chapel and he hears someone move or cough, he whips his head round to see where it's coming from lol. I'm like that at hockey games if I see movement out of the corner of my eye.
I think one of my friends may be a HSP as well. He loves looking at art and listening to or making music. Y'know when you can sort of feel that someone might be sensitive when you talk to them? He kind of gives me those vibes. It just feels like we're both sensing each other's emotions and energy levels back and forth. I can also tell he's very stimulated by visual information. Pays close attention to subtle movements that people make and points out the details in my artwork. He also takes a lot of care with his appearance and definitely has his own style. Another clue is that he's vegan and doesn't drink. Lots of people in the UK ice hockey scene really like him for his uniqueness.
You can be alpha & still be sensitive, strong & avoid stupid posturing. Fight smart.
This is me! Thanks for your dedication to this topic!
Watch video for 9 mins and coming to conclusion that this man is talking about "Highly Sentimental Males" . Sentimentality and Sensitivity are worlds apart my brother
Great video. Seemed authentic coming from you, applicable and real. Looking back, I didn’t begin to exemplify HSP traits until maybe High School. For instance, like you said you stopped sports in High school to skateboard and even had to stop watching sports just a few years ago around age 22. As, when my teams lose, I’m hurt for a week after and like I have ptsd from cardinals losing the super bowl lol that list was on point. I’m an HSS and the only one that didn’t apply exactly as written was having more female friends. As an HSS, my favorite sensation is sex with women and I’m like your friend at the bar, when it comes down to it. So you could say I have a lot of women friends 😂😂 I just know the older ive got, the more and more I exemplify traits. Like, I didn’t think I had a art outlet and wasn’t an artist, until I found shibari and jewelry and accessories making with hemp and other things. I’m just saying this for any young men who think they don’t have enough traits or something. Well, lads, if you cried watching the Iron Giant, you might be HSP even if the traits haven’t unfolded yet.
Thanks for being confident and secure with your traits that the west doesn’t find to be “manly”. I’m outspoken and shameless about all my “not alpha” traits, because I think that’s what really is manly, and we can all change the stigma.
Thanks for the comment! I'm same in that the older I get the more sensitive I am getting.. 😊
I absolutely relate. I took the test developed by Dr. Elaine Aron and I scored I think 26 of 28, can't exactly remember the numbers, but I know it was 2 less than the 100% score. I even developed sensitivity to caffeine in my twenties, and I didn't have a clue that was related to my overall mental wiring, until that came up as a question in Dr. Aron's test. I'm a gay man, and when I was in school, I was teased that I was gay simply because of displaying those typical HSP traits - being kind and a sweetheart. Later in life that got me into "trouble" with women in college who appreciated those traits so much so that they fell in love with me. Whereas I made every possible effort TO BE "friendzoned". I am also a highly affectionate man, a huuuge hugger and I love cuddles, but only with people I'm close with. Quite the opposite applies when someone whom I don't know even brushes against me by accident. I don't like crowded places, nightclubs and the like where people touch you when they're moving from one spot to another. Anybody else has this affection "exclusivity" rule? I'd like to know if it's related to being an HSP or is it just my thing?
THE BARS SUCK FOR ME! I get lucky but only by pretending to be someone I am not or being completely shit faced
LOL!! Same!! :-)
Alpha type males are not always attractive to all women ,they could be too intimidating
Hi Laura, that makes sense. My point in trying to get beta males to add a little "alpha-like" traits is so they can actually approach women without tons of fear and anxiety. Some of the things alpha males do can help to give beta guys more confidence, but I would never want to be (or try to get other guys to be) some super alpha male type. HSP men will never be that way, but I see a lot of HSP men just giving up and becoming cynical. Especially HSP men that undervalue themselves due to past conditioning/trauma. It's sad, because there are a lot of good HSP guys out there, but many have no idea how to even approach a woman, maintain eye contact, have confidence, etc... you know, basics... I don't want to see these guys give up on themselves or the potential to be in fulfilling relationships.
There should be a dating site/app for HSPs....LOL! ... it would be so chill.. Good to hear from you, by the way. I hope all is well!!
hi Steve, I understand what you mean. What I was saying is that HSP men should be aware that not being alpha-like can be something that is actually very appreciated by a woman and they should not feel insecure because of it.I think a man that have the sensitivity to cry, is able to communicate with a woman in so much deeper & closer levels.(sorry for my horrible English). And yes, the date site for HSP would be a great idea, not everybody is a ``highly confident, smart, funny, succesfull winner`in life.I hate sites for that reason. Changing subjet, I'm doing very well thank you. I'm again 27 days sober, Im very happy because its getting easier. I had a major craving a Sunday that I was super bored, but I forced myself to go out of the house and after a couple of hours the cravings dissappeared, I was amazed.Im on vacations now, went camping with friends that drunk everything and I was just enjoing the company.I have to say that Im taking a medicine prescribed by my doctor that I think is helping a lot, its venlafaxine and helps control my anxiety. I hope everything is well with you too!!
Hi Steve, I found out I'm HSP about 3 years ago now. A bit late in life, I've reached middle age and have become even more sensitive which has not helped, I can tell you. Anyway, the reason I reply here is because you talk about having "tons of fear and anxiety". My understanding from my research into this trait is that even though it can feel like anxiety, it is often really just a feeling of being overwhelmed which activates different areas of the brain than fear and anxiety do. So remember to mention "being overwhelmed" when mentioning fear and anxiety please, otherwise it feeds into the stereotype of HSP's being always scared.
As an example, once when I was about to make love to a new woman, I found myself shaking from head to toe. She wanted to know why I was doing that and that's when I realised it had happened to me many times before but I had always ignored it. I wasn't scared though, I was just overwhelmed/excited at the prospect of bedding this beautiful woman. That was over 25 years ago but I can remember it like yesterday :-)
Interesting... I never really looked at it like that. Yeah, I just told a friend of mine today that I was feeling overwhelmed (I feel this way a lot), and you're right about it being different than anxiety, but it feels sort of similar. I'll remember to mention the differences in a future video. I have become more sensitive in middle age as well. The only thing the can get me feeling less stimulated and relaxed is good self care like running through the woods, getting enough sleep, etc. Thanks for the comment.
Laura true
Awesomeness, totally underrated.
Thank You for this podcast Brother 😇🖖
I think the reason women don't usually go for hsps is because they want to tame a beast and hsps are usually already pretty tame. Why else do you think vampires and werewolfs are so popular amungst young girls? Why else would women rather be with an asshole than with a genuinely nice guy?
Great video!
Question: what about alluding or even mentioning one’s HSP sensitivity in your dating profile? Unfortunately in reality, that would probably not attract all women and at worst attract the ‘narcissist’ type. Maybe that would have to balanced with noted achievements to possibly work, on a profile.
That is a great idea! I think declaring our high sensitivity in a dating profile is good idea. As for avoiding Narcissits, I think once HSPs and Empaths are educated about narcs, they can avoided pretty easily. They tend to prey on us when we are ignorant of the signs of NPD.
To be honest it's hard to get the impression you're HSP because your voice reminds me of the Turtle in 'Finding Nemo',
"Hey Duuuude!"
LOL! I grew up Los Angeles, so I do kind of have that regional dialect... I'm legit HSP and INFP (introvert)..
this is what I observed too. You must have spent a lot of time with non-hsps before because you look like a guy who knows their ways. I was always separated from non hsp world and it is nice to see hsp who lived among non hsps and was accepted by them.
I am male hsp. the truth is that I have always been attracted by non hsp world. I was never accepted in those circles unfortunately. When you talk about bars and stuff I see the beauty of these women in front of my eyes. I was always scarred of going to the bars etc but sexual aspect of it was always very appealing to me to be honest. Somebody told me about this world years ago : ' You will be used , manipulated and abandoned in this world'. Is this how this world really works ? Is this possible to contact you in priv somehow ? If you don't mind I would like to ask you few more questions.
You just reiterated my life!