Stephen Learns How To Say 'F*** You' In Canadian
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- čas přidán 25. 04. 2017
- A trade war is blossoming after Trump somehow can't find common ground with the world's most polite people.
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Can confirm, "Disagree strongly" is Canadian for "Fuck you". Souce: am Canadian.
I feel like what Trudeau said in his speech while standing beside Trump was a bigger "middle finger move" than this message, but that's just my opinion. (Hey, fellow Canadian!)
I agree with you both fellow Canadians :-)
cybercat29 - and I agree with all of you. But that's because I'm British and we love you guys over here. You actually understand our humour for heaven's sake, cos yours is basically the same: bone dry and sarcastic. Hah! Love it! ;)
AWW, thank you so much (from Burnaby, British Columbia) :-)
cybercat29 - anytime sweetie. ;)
Ivanka and Donald Trump, I haven't see a couple like this since Greek Mythology.
SpyengoEen Maybe, but Twilight is fiction. Ivanka and her daddy are terrifyingly real. So I'll take fiction anytime over the current reality.
juan gomez You know Ivanka Trump is the Daughter right? Melania Trump is the Wife. T
juan gomez Greek mythology is full of incest...read a book man.
Anon that's kinda what he's saying
Billtang79 Malaria is the paid concubine.
Omg, as a Canadian this was hilarious. We even say sorry to doors when we crash into them 😂
or beluga that we ran on old ladies.
This is true. I do say sorry to inanimate objects and animals. I can’t stop myself.
@@Alibeeee Same here.
Jellys Beans ha true eh! I say sorry for everything
I once apologized to a coffee table after hitting my shin on it. Definitely Canadian.
Proud to be a Canadian
Ugh - as a fellow Canadian I just have to say how pathetic we are. As soon as America pays an iota of attention to us we all blow a nasty orgasam. It's time to grow up and learn some class.
Spectrum proud to be the part of the country that gives a fucking terrorist 10 millions?
Blame the leader, not the people.
I’m Canadian but don’t have pride as one, I mean, why why pride? Lol you silly’s
Because of our electoral system, one doesn't necessarily win by a majority. As it was Trudeau got in with a little more than 1/3. And, he is being absolutely HATED more day by day. Trudeau brings back ISIS fighters to Canada without penalty because they will be a good voice against radicalization (can't make this up). He said "the budget will balance itself". He corrected a woman at a Town Hall, when she said "MANkind". He said "WE..whoever we is...say PEOPLEkind". Google it. He is an unintelligent former substitute drama teacher and snowboard instructor. He gives away millions of our $ to an ex-terrorist, Clinton Foundation...not to mention an $8M (TEMPORARY) ice rink outside of our Parliament Buildings. He is a nutbar MANchild....OOOPS, I mean PEOPLEchild. And if I make a mistake with pronouns I will be fine (C-16...again, look it up, you can't make this up).
Trudeau has to go.
Canada's Minister of Natural Ressources, omg i'm canadian and i laughed so hard at that visual approximation. Gold.
Ditto...from the Vancouver area!!! Funny shit!!
Ditto from Calgary
yeah it was good
Ditto from another Canadian
@Call Me Ninj agreed as a fellow Canadian. I laughed so hard at that accent. But it was a bit more "martime-y" than Ontarian, eh.. lol
The North Remembers.
CJusticeHappen21 The Trudeau's send their regards
you're a genius, man! :)
CJusticeHappen21 OMG HAHAHAHAHH... Best thing I've seen all week...
And winter is coming.....
edmazada winter is still fucking here man. 😂
As a Canadian, can confirm, our beaver of commerce said "fu*k you" in Canadian.
im so pissed off that they did that like their any better
Speaking as a Canadian, we are just grateful to be mentioned. Love from Vancouver!
Exactly.
Canada doesn't subsidize it's lumber and dairy (or animation) to spite America, we do it because we can accept paying higher taxes if it means people can earn livable wages and can still sell these products at a reasonable rate.
Canada is run by human beings. America is run by parasites.
MsRoadtoRiches 😀😀😀😀😀😀😀
Hahahaha A+ Analogy.
William Bradford So true, my sister is one of them. We just hide them.
That is so very true (from Burnaby, British Columbia).
Stephen you are the best
Around, nothing is gonna ever keep you down!
plane nerd PDX I agree! but who is that annoying high pitched voice in the backround =\
DanDunfordRSM That's John Batiste, I love him. I think his outbursts add to the show.
I know! It's sad to see how much people dislike him in the monologues.
The United States tried this before, taxing softwood lumber from Canada,
it didn't work out well for them. The demand is high enough that they
HAVE to buy lumber from Canada, and so adding tariffs just makes
building projects more expensive. The lumber industry of Canada didn't
even notice.
Hmmm.......taxing imports makes things more expensive for us? Talk about unexpected consequences! Who would have predicted that one?
Ya we noticed. Taking names. Marking time.
Canada, we love you. Please ignore our government's bs. They don't speak for all of us.
ASez We know, don't worry :)
Please try to stop Trump from getting rid of your National Park system btw, they are (literally) national treasures! Future generations will be so thankful (or pissed, depending on how it goes). I know I'm probably preaching to the choir here, but I haven't heard much about it in your media...
AWW, thank you so much from Burnaby, British Columbia :-)
Thank you! :)
A. Neufeld Thank you very much for your nice comment! I completely agree on you about the national park system. Hopefully we'll all realize that the US isn't a virgin country anymore, but approaching the point of pure overuse. And, well, 300 million people need to live in that stretch of land, so...
That's bull$hit and you know it. We don't need to live in the land that has been set aside for our future descendants to enjoy and cherish. But, just like Scott Walker has done in Wisconsin, Trump wants to put ALL OF AMERICA UP FOR SALE. Notice he's not doing a damn thing, for instance, from preventing foreigners from buying businesses and real estate in the United States. I'll bet Kim Jung Un has a lot of his money already parked here, freshly laundered in Manhattan and west coast real estate.
Soft wood is what Melania said
their hard wood doesn't have a chance competing.
The shit she has seen. That fucking idiot deserves every dime of her golddigging money.
Just imagine if they ever divorce.....what a tell-all book she could write?! XD
Marco Joseph Cheung more like "saggy cheetos"
+GreenGrasshoppa You can bet that pre-nub has an iron-clad NDA :)
I love how Canada's statement was totally professional and coherent.
I hope someday this can be called: speaking Canadian
It's refreshing! Sorry.
We don't know each other, but I'm sorry you had to apologize. :)
Trump is the only person in the world who could piss off Canada.
When life gives you orange, make a visa application and move to canada
They don't want us. You should check the immigration requirements - wow.
what, does it say leave your guns in your country and accept universal healthcare in exchange?
Sorry Jan for all the red tape. If any of you have a Canadian parent you'll get fast tracked though. Too bad DNA is so sophisticated now or you could just claim to be Mike Myers (or pick a Canadian actor of suitable age) love child and pack up.
Adam Taki Canadian immigration requirements are insane, long and very complicated. Good luck with that. 😅
Yeah good luck with that. My aunt is a nun and she got denied for just a visitor visa to Canada.
'Oly jeeze dere, guy.. Y'gotta cool it on th'old Canada bashin' eh? We're gonna be growin' all yer oranges in about twenny years time, wit all dat global warmin' you sent us. Also, we're gonna still be habitable without a refrigeration suit.
Just so you know the only people who speak like that in Canada are old people from the east coast and hicks from the mid west.
And, just so you know, Canadians use more energy per capita than Americans do . . .
@@MrJfergs maybe sounds like a Yooper accent, too.
OMG that Justin Trudeau joke!! 😂😂😂
I know, right! I almost wrote the exact same thing!
+Kristin Drysdale lol yes! That was beautiful! 😂😂
I don't get it. What does it mean?
Catherine tt holy shit the ............... is real.
Ashmita Nandy knob dick stuff monster schlong bird ding dong hardon willy peewee rod sausage meat and now wood. men's genitals have so many names
"...that's Canadian for ** **** *******!..." It's a good thing I learned to put my coffee down before hitting 'play' on these :D
But, yes, yes it is...only you left out "buddy" at the end. Perhaps that's only in the Level 2 Canadian language courses ;)
As a Canadian, I was laughing full out just one minute into this video.
Orange must be upset that his daughter likes Trudeau more than she likes daddy.
I'm a conscientious Canuck. I think that I speak for many in the Great White North... you let Trump HAPPEN! We love you. We forgive you... but LEARN from this! Listen to Bernie. I make $14 an hour, had four surgeries and I'm not bankrupt from healthcare... so we're doing something right. It's more than just possible. Blessings from Canada.
I got a better idea. YOU give us Trump and we will give you Lizzy May, Kathlynne Wynne and Justin and call it even.
Much of what you say is true. Many Canadians are guilty of a false sense of superiority that leads to delusion about our place in the world. I am not one of those. I admire the US for it's accomplishments and weep when I see the state of our armed forces. We have the best troops inn the world bar none, but we never seem to be able to provide for them the equipment they need in a timely fashion. I am also part of a small minority. I am a social conservative that understands that spending other peoples money to give yourself a few perks, is hardly a prescription for long term success.
You nailed that one. I'd trade the used sock salesman for Trump anyday, and toss in Wynne to sweeten the deal.
@@BloodhandsVideo Not true even in the slightest. What's happening here is no different than what's happening all over the globe. Technology is changing too fast for the older folks to keep up and many have to stay in their old jobs because the new technology is designed and as a rule, operated by the young folks who grew up with this stuff. The baby boomers are dying off though because of cancers and the like but not through absent medical care because they can't afford it. This progression is called time and it affects everyone. Universal Health Care is doable. The problem with the US system is that Wall Street is involved in your healthcare. Face it, the guys on Wall Street would let everyone die before they would give up a nickel of profit in their own jeans. THAT'S your problem!
@@BloodhandsVideo No we are not. Our middle class is doing fine thank you.
I always laughed whenever Stephen impersonates Trump 😂
To our Canadian friends, you are much too polite to our President and his staff...yet somehow, your civility is a breath of fresh air by comparison to 45's (Trump's) rhetoric. Greetings from Washington State! (I am a big fan of British Columbia, by the way). :)
Eric Schumaker by July 1st, come buy some BC budd eh !
Well I'm from BC and I'm a big fan of Washington State...
Eric Schumaker eyyy I live in BC
Eric Schumaker Hello from Vancouver, BC.
I'm a big fan of Seattle, but I wouldn't live in your Country!
Hi Americans.
I strongly disagree.
I'm sorry.
A Canadian
I guess Americans will be paying a hell of a lot more to build anything.
cheryl gould especially when the price of lumber going up.....
I watched this months ago and only just rewatched it now. This time I noticed Steven's "Canadian"accent, really cracked me up, that and the "visual approximation" of our Minister of Natural Resources.
"...making her the first trump to attend a women's conference which did not include a swimsuit competition."
OHHHHHHH DAY-YAMN!!
just wait til we impose a 25% tariff on oil.
did u guys know that we power most of new york state? look up niagara falls power grid. we can cut off over 30+ million people from electricity. u guys do not make enough to supply the needs.
Methos FilmsTrump's views do not represent the rest of this country's views
Caleb 1111 well yeah, but he's the head of the state. His words and opinion represents the country as a whole
Trump will come and take your Niagra Fall and make you pay for it.
haha he'll probably have a better chance trying to get THAT into a bill then the wall.
Haha yeah it's like when Iowa (which voted Trump) realized that their chief rural economy is corn... and Mexico was their biggest customer. Oops...
"this is the first time anyone has rejected justin trudeau's wood" lmao i'd never
Trump just raised the prices on your building materials. Congratulations.
Ken Lee The Chinese have too much steel and are dumping it on the market.
@@dulynoted2427 sure, that isn't wrong, but it's not the conversation we are having here.
That's right Mr. Colbert, fear us Canadians. For we have the two resources that you fear: maple syrup and goose feathers. Need I say more?
And godless bears.
Bruce Aitken also fries dripping in sauce
And double doubles, eh
and open mindness to hump everything!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bruce Aitken , 😂
Ivanka being a champion for women empowerment is like Jeff sessions being for BLM 😂😂😂
You don't need to call Ivanka Trump a cunt. That is demeaning to all women. There are plenty of reasons to diss the woman without insulting all of us, and intelligent and unvulgar ways to go about it, ArtGirl82.
I think Ivanka can be summed up as sort of a twisted victim of Stockholm Syndrome. She truly does believe every word she utters about her father, but it's because he was her model for how a man should treat a woman as she grew up. That's bound to create a twisted sense of what "women's empowerment" looks like. Add in the Trumps' trademark ability to uncannily and hypocritically ignore their own bad behavior whilst calling the exact same behavior out in others, and there you go.
Well played!! Lol
Kamila M. Oh rubbish, as a citizen of the world she sees what is right and wrong. She would do well to disassociate herself as soon as possible. She knows what he is. She chooses to support him, she is complicit.
Kamila M... are you talking about the same Jeff Sessions who in 2009 received an "Award of Excellence" from the NAACP....yeah the guy is a real racist!!!
we should just tax the fuck outta our oil and electricty that gets sent to the states
As a Canadian I approve this message.
My Canadian parents hate this message
@@nocucksinkekistan7321 So do I.
Canada is awesome
I watch all the late night monologues in the morning and Colbert is by far the best.
Good job america, you're commander in chief is trying to become ally with his oldest ennemy and trying to become an ennemy of his oldest ally. LMAO
Diadlo Russia? And Canada rarely ever helps us except NATO forces them and even then they just don't do enough to support us hell they rely on our military and NATO for defense their military is a literal joke.
You probably voted for Trump I assume since you have close to none history knowledge, let's just forget that Canada was the closest ally to the US during the cold war or that they acted as support to the US in the war in Afghanistan by sending their elite force, the JTF2, in Afghanistan right after the 9/11, hell they even forgave the US for killing and wounding some of their soldiers.
Actually, why don't you go and read a little bit : canadianally.com/about-us
If you do take a couple of minutes to read that, you will most likely leave your computer a lot smarter about the outside world then you were.
But you're right uh, USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA!!!
Let's just have Canada become an hostile country to the US and establish a joint military base with Russia and China in the Appalaches, right next to Washington DC, New York, Boston, Pittsburg, Philly, etc...
Let's see where that's gonna leave the world.
But it's alright because Trump and his supporters want to be hostile to Canada who's their oldest ally. lmao
You're funny.
I seriously can't believe our morons are picking a fight with Canadians now. Aren't we already on the verge of kicking off a nuclear engagement with North Korea? We bomb Syria, we bomb Afghanistan killing innocents, we get (sorta) bombed by Turkey and they called for Erdogan's head too, we're in a pissing match with Mexico, when does it fucking end with these people?
They're like the drunk guy in a bar screaming, "What you lookin at, huh?! You wanna go?" It's un-fucking-believable.
@Tracey Johnson
Ummm, sure but why are you replying that to me? haha
Pretty sure it was aimed at @Erik P.T. but still. haha
You have no idea what you're talking about. NATO never for Ed Canada into anything. Sorry that we won't blindly follow you into one unjust war after another.
Your entire country is a joke.
I'm from Canada so I was laughing and crying at the same time
Omg I just choked on my coffee at that Trudeau joke... 😱😱😂😂😂😂
Just watch as the price of toilet paper spikes.
James Dana that wood hurt....
This comment aged well. Lol
Ain't nobody rejecting Trudeau's wood👏👏👏
Ivanka is always chasing Justin's hardwood.
"Justin Trudeau's wood"
OMG, as a Canadian, I approve of this joke.
i want his wood
vistaprime ew
justin's father, pierre coined the actual canadian for f.u - fuddleduddle
Prime Minister Trudeau's father, Pierre Trudeau, in a fit of Canadian pique, said "fuddle-duddle! Well, he probably said the other, but CLAIMED he said "fuddle duddle".
I am SO embarrassed to be an American.
I feel for you... i would be embarrssed 2 if we had Trump as president ... A Canadian who loves Americans
Don’t be embarrassed
I'm Canadian but honestly I don't really care it's just funny seing people laughing at stereotypes.
YES! That's totally what we need - a total rebranding of the entire Trump family and administration. Stephen, you're a genius!
Ahem Justin Trudeau's wood isn't SOFTwood
emercycrite yeah, trump's a friend of putin and an enemy of poutine
TRUDEAU is a circus clown ballerina fairy girly boy...twerp, a LIBERAL globalist pervert
His wood might not be soft, but his head sure is. What a total idiot.
Oh, I thought that's what he was wearing on his head.
Can't stop picturing Justin Trudeau's wood now. Thanx Stephen
As a Canadian, I endorse this message!
Damn Stephen!! You were extra savage today
You are simply THE BEST, unbeatable 😂😂😂
Ah, 2017, such a simple time ...
Thank you #stephencobert and #CBS. you guys rock!
Trump wants to impose a tariff on imports from _Canada?_ Oh yeah. Great idea. 🤦
inSherlock - yeah, watch out Taylor Kitsch, Ryan Reynolds and Keanu Reeves! It's coming!!
Who does Trump thinks pays tariffs? Not Canada, not Mexico. We pay it. It raises the price on goods we need or can't get here and we pay those higher prices. It is a way to discourage us from buying foreign made goods and only buying American. Now try to find something made in America. We don't make anything here anymore. I always try to buy American but we don't make fabric, or furniture, or electronics, or anything I need so it just costs us more when we have less buying power because we can't get a raise.
Actually no
Didn't you listen to what he said. We're going to start doing lumber here. Once that happens, then you'll be able to get a great job lumbering.
Any other Canadians come back to this years later? Colbert will always be funny to me
Jon Batiste singing, "they want it!" on the Trudeau wood joke, cracked me up.
Yes. We are laid back and polite...until you put us in skates and give us a hockey stick.
honestly I didn't think that Stephen would manage to have a monologue about trump-related things every weekday as long as trump's president but he seems to be doing so many stupid things each day that the jokes are just endless and Stephen doesn't even have to TRY to find things to talk about, they just come to him.
It's kind of sad when the funniest part of the monologue is a direct quote. "We're going to start doing lumber here." Seriously? Our president said that?
Hahahaha I'm so salty, they almost made me miss that golden impression of Enrico Vittadini at the end there.
"...friends with Putin and enemies with poutine." LMAO! That's a good one! (Poutine is a Canadian favorite fast food dish known in English as chips and gravy).
I'm Canadian. I love when people make fun of us
So Americans will pay more for lumber. Lose-lose deal. So much for The Great Negotiator.
Omg the visual approximation of the canadian minister of natural resources! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Shots fired! Can Hear the burn unit rushing to the scene!
omg Colberts impression of our Canadian Accent...hilarious!!
SilkyC you mean: hilarious eh?
Step 1: be born rich, step 2: just in case, marry rich 😂
Proud Canadian...and I found your particular Canadian portrayal quite humorous. Thank you! LOL..you F**kin rock!
The witness protection plan clothing line! haha!
I'm here from 2019, when Stephen looks considerably older...it's been a rough two years.
I'm from 2021. It gets worse.
@@zahraabdullahi1601 It CERTAINLY does.
Finally somebody famous made a Putin-Poutine joke!
Man, this new Vittadini Hotel looks classy.
The great Canadian band Loverboy was recently remembered on Late Show.
Working For The Weekend and Turn Me Loose. Have Loverboy ON Late Show, Stephen!
What the Presidummy doesn't realize is that 1 tariff will spur and equal and opposite tariff. And that increase in in lumber prices increases construction cost which decreases sales which will increase unemployment
Huh huh huh (beevis voice). He said soft WOOD. HUH HUH HUH....
Ooohhh yeah heheheehe
huhuhuhuh
kmr1121 ahhhhhhhhhhhh
Heheheeee I need TP for my bonghole.
That beaver approximation was chefs kiss, baby!
Stephen You Rock!
Stephen "cold blooded" colbert, he's too savage 😂
In Canada we don't have fighting words. You will never know when we hit. Watch out!
@Josephine Bournes lol
00:57 Listen to Stephen getting all potty mouth HAHAHAHA
The beaver lol!
Someone mute that piano guy!
chri2453
Love the piano guy. He's so talented.
When the US levies tariffs on Canadian Softwood they usually overcharge and are encouraged to revise downwards (both NAFTA and the WTO have determined these) From memory a tariff of about 10% is usually the highest the arbitration has accepted. Now there's 2 questions going forward: Will a ruling be made against the tariff and secondly: Will the US respect the ruling?
One of the most savage Colbert episodes, fuckin' love you man
MWAHAHAHAA!! We shall defeat you! With Timbits and poutine!
Oh my ... GREAT monologue, Stephen!
If I have to hear "Coooold Bloooooded..." one more god damn time...
Secret Steve u mad?
bro i know it gets annoying but you know what ill buy you a beer to make you feel better
I'd appreachiate some help here but wouldn't that additional tax hurt the wood working industry IN the US that depends on getting it for a good price which would now be less good? Or is that not how import taxes work?
LOVED how accurate and funny the Trump and Ivanka jokes were!
Colbert has the best writers.
Trump, it's aboot time Canadian’s booted Wal-mart out of Canada! Ah!
Trump, it's aboot time Canadian’s raised taxes on American oil companies! Ah!
Trump, it's aboot time Canadian’s raised the royalties on American oil companies! Ah!
Trump, it's aboot time Canadian’s quit buying American military hardware! Ah!Trump, it’s about time Canadian’s quit supplying uranium for American Nuclear weapons! Ah!
I wouldn't reject his wood either. 😬
Don't fuck with Canada!
A colbert masterpiece
I disagree strongly with Donald Trump and everyone supporting him.
AisuruMirai we will boycut America . All Canadians should stand up and say no more bullying from the USA
sarah Palestine Canada has higher alcohol content beer.... and maple syrup...
I would love to see what happens. Lol
I go to Wolf Island every summer, Trump is admired there, flat out is, saw MAGA hats a plenty.They are sick of paying for Canada's mistakes.
AisuruMirai sounds to me like you are an idiot. Trump is a long way from perfect but he is a hellofalot better than the used sock salesman we have for a Prime minister.
Who cares?
I would NOT...reject Trudeau's wood. and I'm not ashamed of it... I'm not gonna say sohree.
Just me re-watching Stephen over the Christmas break😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
That is the photo of OUR Justin TRUDEAU WOW!!!!! AMAZING