Ari Shaffir - The Time Ari Used a Condom - This Is Not Happening - Uncensored

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  • čas přidán 5. 06. 2017
  • After Ari Shaffir had sex with a stranger he didn't trust, he ended up going to extreme lengths to avoid disposing of a condom in her home.
    Watch full episodes of This Is Not Happening now: www.cc.com/shows/this-is-not-h...
    Follow Ari Shaffir on Twitter: / arishaffir
  • Komedie

Komentáře • 491

  • @BigHeartBraveSchlong
    @BigHeartBraveSchlong Před 7 lety +1443

    I love that he introduces himself

  • @renel8964
    @renel8964 Před 5 lety +508

    That 70s prom suit he's wearing 😂😂

    • @mikemartinez5637
      @mikemartinez5637 Před 5 lety +2

      Hell yeah uncle Joey

    • @bluntforcetrauma7136
      @bluntforcetrauma7136 Před 5 lety +2

      He's dressed like the Joker.

    • @Superknullisch
      @Superknullisch Před 4 lety +2

      Fuckin love it!! classy as fuck!

    • @babasemka
      @babasemka Před 3 lety +1

      Can you, please, explain it to me, what's wrong with wearing a suit from the 70's? Please.

    • @sumboy6183
      @sumboy6183 Před 3 lety +1

      @@babasemka its 2020 lol. I love it tho i think its more of a joker look

  • @blickygobrrrrr
    @blickygobrrrrr Před 5 lety +62

    I love when Ari Shaffir introduces Ari Shaffir! 😂🤣😅

  • @rudeasparagus5012
    @rudeasparagus5012 Před 6 lety +797

    If I had the opportunity to get on that stage and tell a story, I'd talk about that time my acid trip didnt wear off the night before and I had to go skydiving that morning

  • @stephenhunter6507
    @stephenhunter6507 Před 4 lety +79

    Anyone else binge watching these videos?

    • @Sin.Atonement
      @Sin.Atonement Před 4 lety

      Ever since I found it last night lol

    • @devanpitts3799
      @devanpitts3799 Před 4 lety +2

      stephen hunter yaaaas!! Ari's are the best! And the guy that stole the Jersey twice!!! And meth pee!! 🤣🤣🤣

    • @darkodev6961
      @darkodev6961 Před 4 lety +1

      stephen hunter I’ve been binge watching for days

    • @dominickschrute3084
      @dominickschrute3084 Před 4 lety

      Devan pitts agreed ari's are the best. I was pleasantly surprised by the brendan schaub one

  • @babasemka
    @babasemka Před 3 lety +25

    Lowkey the best thing in that bit was "If that's a full condom, you have a very positive way of looking at the World"

  • @rayshaunchalmers1117
    @rayshaunchalmers1117 Před 5 lety +95

    "THE SEED OF A MAN WITH A JOB!!!!" 😂 😂 😂 😂

  • @kaylaholley1488
    @kaylaholley1488 Před 4 lety +15

    The condom real estate joke has gone over so many heads I am sure. God I love this man,

    • @taylorgoetz7604
      @taylorgoetz7604 Před 3 lety

      free rent best rent

    • @ticrific
      @ticrific Před rokem

      Yeah I don’t get it lol can u explain

    • @BytheTicket222
      @BytheTicket222 Před 11 měsíci

      ​@ticrific2714 he said that black people don't know anything about condoms so he thinks Ari is talking about condos (condominiums).

  • @anorourke8682
    @anorourke8682 Před 7 lety +120

    'Scumbag'
    Well... quite a literal take on the theme...

  • @smoothslide
    @smoothslide Před 7 lety +42

    The God part is underrated. Amazing setup that probably went a little over people's head, initially.

  • @Entgineer
    @Entgineer Před 7 lety +225

    this nigga introduced himself

    • @zjygkmatt
      @zjygkmatt Před 7 lety +12

      he always does

    • @Cheekyandy
      @Cheekyandy Před 7 lety +2

      white powers ignorance at its finest

    • @SyphexGaming
      @SyphexGaming Před 7 lety +6

      Thats not ignorance, thats a spell check.

    • @IrisKavanoz
      @IrisKavanoz Před 7 lety

      They're on a budget you know

    • @Cheekyandy
      @Cheekyandy Před 7 lety +1

      your name is whitie powers no need to argue

  • @danielward2263
    @danielward2263 Před 5 lety +9

    I love how in all these he introduces himself in third person as the host😂

  • @user-bz3ij4vc4f
    @user-bz3ij4vc4f Před 6 lety +14

    Why does he introduce himself like that😂

  • @blazedandconfused477
    @blazedandconfused477 Před 7 lety +292

    The Time Ari Didn't Pay Up After Losing A Bet With Bert And Tom

    • @blazedandconfused477
      @blazedandconfused477 Před 7 lety +3

      heheIt was a pretty sweet saga! Just a part of me is genuinely stuck wondering if he was doing the Jew stereotype to play into the jokes.

    • @thasco
      @thasco Před 7 lety

      old & incorrect news.
      NEXT TOPIC

    • @stoopsyo
      @stoopsyo Před 7 lety +8

      incorrect? how? cause joe bailed him out?

    • @Kariegoz
      @Kariegoz Před 7 lety

      This man needs Jesus.

    • @TheSpeedyCola
      @TheSpeedyCola Před 4 lety

      Whatta welcher!

  • @mandimartin5521
    @mandimartin5521 Před 5 lety +3

    His suit is super. And his face when he introduces himself. So much love.

  • @greenrangerva
    @greenrangerva Před 4 lety +12

    Ari never disappoints 😂

  • @JuanRodriguez-yy6hq
    @JuanRodriguez-yy6hq Před 4 lety +5

    Ari is a comic genius

  • @christinamurphy6446
    @christinamurphy6446 Před 7 lety +258

    So is reverse Benjamin buttoning just normal aging?

  • @ozzy9226
    @ozzy9226 Před 6 lety +215

    Honestly the show went down hill after he stopped hosting it

    • @NitemareTheatre
      @NitemareTheatre Před 4 lety +9

      Really? I have been watching clips from before and after he left and haven't noticed a difference. Also the three stories Roy Wood Jr I've seen tell are among my favorites.

  • @d.y.358
    @d.y.358 Před 6 lety +1

    Love your stories.

  • @realRDT33
    @realRDT33 Před 7 lety +70

    "Reverse Benjamin Button." So, like, the normal aging process?

  • @AllenStarkwell
    @AllenStarkwell Před 5 lety +1

    Absolutely brilliant!

  • @PoptartGang98
    @PoptartGang98 Před 3 lety +2

    That real estate joke was too good

  • @slopez5136
    @slopez5136 Před 3 lety +1

    I knew it would suck
    Did not disappoint

  • @JRT.9
    @JRT.9 Před 6 lety +1

    That intro was amazing 😂

  • @abstractduran7961
    @abstractduran7961 Před 7 lety +39

    one of the best intros😂👏

  • @Princessshamanarta
    @Princessshamanarta Před 5 lety +7

    "Did you just hit me with a full condom!" I lost it...I was laughing...

  • @Fetor
    @Fetor Před 7 lety +3

    Good story, funny AF

  • @abhijeet.kavia13
    @abhijeet.kavia13 Před 6 lety

    Best intro EVERRRRRR... 🤣😂😂🤣🤣🤣

  • @IrisKavanoz
    @IrisKavanoz Před 7 lety

    this is the best I swear

  • @amandam.8550
    @amandam.8550 Před 7 lety +29

    😂😂 I needed a laugh this Morning!

  • @michaelboskovich6948
    @michaelboskovich6948 Před 5 lety +5

    Love this guy - . I love laughing.

  • @FestiveParrot
    @FestiveParrot Před 4 lety +1

    A Häagen-Dazs dip cone, most relatable image ever xD

  • @madnessinisolation
    @madnessinisolation Před 7 lety +53

    "Let me smell your vagina!"
    LMAO! Best intro out of all the crazy ones Ari has done for TINH.

  • @fargoth7
    @fargoth7 Před 7 lety

    I laughed out loud at the intro

  • @matthewkain1205
    @matthewkain1205 Před 4 lety

    Ari your the best........... USA no1. Best skit start yet.

  • @shittyshow
    @shittyshow Před 3 lety +4

    2:55 😂😂😂 Holy shit!
    You know, THAT's what makes Ari amazing.
    It's not really the story he's telling, but everything he comes up with in the process.
    He's an incredible improviser.

  • @harrywatts7305
    @harrywatts7305 Před 6 lety

    ARIIIIIII! Cant watch past season 1 in Aus? Any chance changing this setting is an easy fix? I binged watched the first season and its just too funny i died a few times inside. Keep up the awesome work!
    Also, sorry on behalf of all Australian's for our filthy dirt weed.

  • @starboy123100
    @starboy123100 Před 5 lety

    Oh wow 😂 This might be one of the best opening...

  • @jameswar9768
    @jameswar9768 Před 4 lety

    He said I just thought I would show him 😂😂😂

  • @ozzy9226
    @ozzy9226 Před 6 lety +2

    Love ya ari ur the man so funny wish I could hang out and smoke a joint with u bro keep up the good work pal

  • @tblasley1700
    @tblasley1700 Před 4 lety +2

    I saw the crowd change multiple times throughout this set.

  • @enterusername2084
    @enterusername2084 Před 7 lety +11

    How fucked up does a toilet have to look that you don't think it can flush things lol

    • @inTsLewis
      @inTsLewis Před 7 lety +3

      Enter Username if you've ever clogged one with something innocuous you'll soon learn to become apprehensive. Haha

  • @conormcdowell612
    @conormcdowell612 Před 6 lety +2

    I'm so glad I heard this. Out off all the guys I know me and another friend are the only 2 to strike someone with a "full" condom 😂

  • @rawreal7232
    @rawreal7232 Před 4 lety +1

    Haha bloody introduces himself XD

  • @DursunX
    @DursunX Před 5 lety +12

    im an optimist *the condom is always half full* 👻

    • @randybuja7278
      @randybuja7278 Před 4 lety

      Makes sense. Optomist = small dick. Got it

  • @Angus413
    @Angus413 Před 4 lety +1

    I don’t pop Molly I rock Tom.....oh wait no I pop Molly 🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @freddymeisner
    @freddymeisner Před 7 lety +1

    Powerful punch drunk sports shoutout

  • @OzzieTheHead
    @OzzieTheHead Před 5 lety

    That one woman at the back constantly looking at her phone, lol

  • @marvinlee2792
    @marvinlee2792 Před 5 lety +3

    the part when he slapped his friend with the used condom, is gold. this is genuinely funny. cant rmb when was the last time I had a laugh this hard. good stuff

  • @atticus4925
    @atticus4925 Před rokem +2

    I once got a rubber stuck to the ceiling and me and my ex fiancee left it there till It fell a week later cause we're just tidy people like that

  • @MrMomoitin
    @MrMomoitin Před 3 lety

    These intros are fucking hilarious

  • @ryanmoon6315
    @ryanmoon6315 Před 5 lety

    next time I take of a condemn imma shout "GRENADE" lmao!

  • @Inaugurati
    @Inaugurati Před 6 lety

    good point

  • @zeitGGeist
    @zeitGGeist Před 6 lety

    I laughed a fucking ton. timing worked for me really well. I just wish it ended right at "if thats a full condom..."

  • @MaynardOwns
    @MaynardOwns Před 5 lety

    That intro was fuckin hilarious

  • @xpointkiller
    @xpointkiller Před 7 lety

    I have to admit this was a pretty good story.

  • @somedummyonthenet
    @somedummyonthenet Před 3 lety

    That intro!

  • @PleasestopcallingmeDoctorImath

    STILL FROM THE SAME NIGHT?!

  • @MrGuy__
    @MrGuy__ Před 4 lety +1

    man, this playlist is really long

  • @drewschlosser26
    @drewschlosser26 Před 5 lety

    Best tuxedo ever....

  • @SmilingKratosTheGodOfWar
    @SmilingKratosTheGodOfWar Před 5 lety +1

    Omg when he hit the punch line I fell out of my chair.

  • @jameslukas9002
    @jameslukas9002 Před 5 lety +3

    I have the same paranoia. I can't leave condoms that I've jizzed in at a girls house 😂😂 I thought I was the only one

  • @spaghettiwrestler
    @spaghettiwrestler Před 7 lety +76

    that drowning joke bombed

    • @eg6477
      @eg6477 Před 6 lety +17

      I heard laughter at the punch line....where it supposed to occur.

  • @ddp7028
    @ddp7028 Před 5 lety

    4:50😂😂 lmfaooooo

  • @ShellfishBangs
    @ShellfishBangs Před 4 lety

    Everyone says he is such a bad person... but damn he is funny🥺

  • @etherealawakening7720
    @etherealawakening7720 Před 3 lety

    OMG!!! Slappin' yo friends with a used jizzy wrap!!! That. Is. PRICELESS!!!

  • @justinzoraik4063
    @justinzoraik4063 Před 7 lety +6

    reverse Benjamin button? You mean regular aging, Ari?

  • @alexludavertigo6926
    @alexludavertigo6926 Před 2 lety

    It cancels out 🤣 simple mathematics

  • @stuarterwin4848
    @stuarterwin4848 Před 3 lety

    I miss Ari

  • @yomybutthurtzzz8051
    @yomybutthurtzzz8051 Před 3 lety

    It'll come out when it's done lmfao rofl

  • @alecscott653
    @alecscott653 Před 7 lety +16

    Ari's comedy is on fire lately. The Chinese story was hilarious too. Can't wait for his specials.

  • @nateclayton4068
    @nateclayton4068 Před 7 lety

    Wicked wish he did more stories , I don't let me view the first 100 sum reason I live in Canada

  • @TruthIsTheNewHate84
    @TruthIsTheNewHate84 Před 6 lety +46

    Not throwing a condom away at a girls house is actually really good advice. Particularly if its a one night stand with a chick you dont really know.

    • @danolive6950
      @danolive6950 Před 5 lety +12

      Sperm out from the body cools off quickly and doesn't survive long outside the average human temperature. I wouldn't worry too much.

    • @Manly-Tears
      @Manly-Tears Před 5 lety +1

      @@danolive6950 The fact that you left the condom itself leaves a doubt, which in the process of finding out the truth, might ruin your life. Imagine that girl coming to your workplace screaming about "it's your baby" with a used condom...

    • @DrWoog
      @DrWoog Před 4 lety +1

      @@danolive6950 ask Boris Becker

  • @krystalayala8451
    @krystalayala8451 Před 4 lety +3

    As a phlebotomist I can say this now. Semen doesn’t live for more than an hour outside body temperature environment.

    • @jmjjr112
      @jmjjr112 Před 3 lety

      Wanna take that chance? 😏

  • @stevenbenitez1851
    @stevenbenitez1851 Před 7 lety

    Holy shit Ari is BAKED lmfao

  • @cthulhujankinx5652
    @cthulhujankinx5652 Před 5 lety

    Not a bad intro for the theme

  • @stagglee1227
    @stagglee1227 Před 3 lety +1

    Yeah...he's definitely the sociopath of the crew

  • @fullysuited
    @fullysuited Před 5 lety +3

    This is going to be bad. I haven't even watched it yet. LET'S SEE

  • @jesserenn3152
    @jesserenn3152 Před 5 lety +1

    He's thinking " this is WHY i was psyched to get a ride instead of riding the bus. I was worried I'd get hit with a used condom on the bus but here's Ari slapping me with one. I may need better friends"

  • @enderwiggin9303
    @enderwiggin9303 Před rokem

    Wow, first down I've given this is not happening

  • @hassanaslam7410
    @hassanaslam7410 Před 4 lety

    The intro Is fucking trippy cause I was fucking high (should try😂😂)

  • @mrtheludman9273
    @mrtheludman9273 Před 4 lety +2

    This man is the best

  • @biigbabiibeean6312
    @biigbabiibeean6312 Před 5 lety +7

    The first time I saw him entroduce himself I was like what.. is there a guy that looks exactly like him he has a twin? What, what's going on

  • @durdleskattman4635
    @durdleskattman4635 Před 7 lety

    I was like the 1000th to see this and like 49th to comment!

  • @fullysuited
    @fullysuited Před 5 lety

    Wait Wait Wait.....he said he would give his friend a ride home because he is in a great mode. Ha ha ha. I guess his joke about taking friends to the airport is true.

  • @druidboy76
    @druidboy76 Před 6 lety

    Right. In “her” home.

  • @JamesLee-uz2ju
    @JamesLee-uz2ju Před 4 lety

    Long Live Koby Thee Great

  • @carlosgutierrez9007
    @carlosgutierrez9007 Před 7 lety

    No video today ??????

  • @naughtyleopard21
    @naughtyleopard21 Před 11 měsíci

    That was a painful story 😳😆

  • @morsecodereviews1553
    @morsecodereviews1553 Před 6 lety

    Well, when you put it that way.

  • @devanpitts3799
    @devanpitts3799 Před 4 lety +2

    Ewww Ari touched the pole!!!🤣🤣🤣

  • @jeffcloss7160
    @jeffcloss7160 Před 6 lety

    happyness

  • @redneckshaman3099
    @redneckshaman3099 Před rokem

    I'm addicted to pigger nussy 🤠

  • @xavierwashington5408
    @xavierwashington5408 Před 6 lety

    Last of Ari

  • @kylekenney1907
    @kylekenney1907 Před 4 lety +3

    Shit I thought I was the only one worried about trapping

  • @fatherforrest4777
    @fatherforrest4777 Před 7 lety +1

    Where is this bar?

  • @Nic-bm5lf
    @Nic-bm5lf Před 4 lety

    😂 the fear of trapping is real shit if your rich and famous 😅

  • @brodiemacaskill3522
    @brodiemacaskill3522 Před 5 lety

    who else knew what he was thinking about

  • @samthekashman
    @samthekashman Před 7 lety +65

    "black people don't wear condoms" 😂😂😂😂