Meanwhile… Disco Bathroom | Kid Stuck In The Claw Game | Transatlantic Pot Bust

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  • čas přidán 5. 02. 2024
  • Meanwhile… A store in Kentucky has the world’s grooviest bathroom, an Australian toddler got stuck in the claw game at an arcade, and a pair of cruise passengers were arrested after trying to sail to England with 112 bags of marijuana.
    #Colbert #Comedy #Meanwhile
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    Watch The Late Show with Stephen Colbert weeknights at 11:35 PM ET/10:35 PM CT. Only on CBS.
    ---
    Stephen Colbert brings his signature satire and comedy to THE LATE SHOW with STEPHEN COLBERT, the #1 show in late night, where he talks with an eclectic mix of guests about what is new and relevant in the worlds of politics, entertainment, business, music, technology and more. Featuring bandleader Louis Cato and “THE LATE SHOW band,” the Peabody Award-winning and Emmy Award-nominated show is broadcast from the historic Ed Sullivan Theater. Stephen Colbert took over as host, executive producer and writer of THE LATE SHOW on Sept. 8, 2015.
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Komentáře • 463

  • @Tonyhouse1168
    @Tonyhouse1168 Před 4 měsíci +192

    Better ingredients.
    Better pizza.
    Is potato.

    • @malervik4176
      @malervik4176 Před 4 měsíci

      czcams.com/video/VSfdzVhhcWo/video.html

    • @AtariEric
      @AtariEric Před 4 měsíci +6

      I think I'd prefer the potato.

    • @mevansmrichard
      @mevansmrichard Před 4 měsíci +3

      I love your comment.

    • @ryanbauer3680
      @ryanbauer3680 Před 4 měsíci +1

      This is clearly the slogan of Papa John's knock off Russian cousin, Otets Dzhon (Отец Джон).

    • @Nelsea7190
      @Nelsea7190 Před 4 měsíci +2

      Better ingredients.
      Better pizza.
      its crickets and yes its actually better than our old recipes!

  • @Bare_Essence
    @Bare_Essence Před 4 měsíci +46

    Come on ... cricket flour? "Jiminy Croquettes" was right there.

  • @JadeValour
    @JadeValour Před 4 měsíci +155

    Stephen, you should publish a book of all your Meanwhile ‘preludes’. They’re fantastic!🤣💖

    • @katherineparker2743
      @katherineparker2743 Před 4 měsíci +9

      TBH I skip over that part now (love Stephen, just sick of that long lead up :-) )

    • @Jonathanizer
      @Jonathanizer Před 4 měsíci +3

      @@katherineparker2743 Yeah same. I found it amusing the first ten times or so, but then it became somewhat boring.
      Don't get me wrong, it's generally well phrased and presented, but the premise is so predictable, that i can't find myself entertained by that bit anymore.

    • @nicholase2868
      @nicholase2868 Před 4 měsíci +2

      I love them, they are better than many of the stories IMO.

    • @Nelsea7190
      @Nelsea7190 Před 4 měsíci +2

      i dont bother with the preludes either. too much and too long to go listen to...

    • @bonilla2022
      @bonilla2022 Před 4 měsíci +1

      No... But thanx.

  • @jujitsujew23
    @jujitsujew23 Před 4 měsíci +9

    I love how Stephen has been doing that same retching gag since his days at second city. It always works

  • @tcpkali
    @tcpkali Před 4 měsíci +21

    Unbelievable the use of an expensive gadget to set timer for two cooking pots. There are no words for the skill. 😂

    • @Digitokethreepointoh
      @Digitokethreepointoh Před 4 měsíci

      I mentioned this in another chat but future versions could be used in schools to augment learning and ELIMINATE possible deficiencies through eye tracking and synchronization.

    • @leavingitblank9363
      @leavingitblank9363 Před 4 měsíci

      @@Digitokethreepointoh I can imagine there are a lot of excellent uses for this gadget, especially in business. I'm surprised they even bother to market it for home chores. Or that anyone would consider it for that.

  • @vsznry
    @vsznry Před 4 měsíci +14

    So excited to fuckup Mar a Lago in GTA VI .

  • @marksnyder8022
    @marksnyder8022 Před 4 měsíci +19

    I live too close to Florence Kentucky to be happy with that restroom.

  • @philoctetes_wordsworth
    @philoctetes_wordsworth Před 4 měsíci +88

    The closing joke was pure gold, but it would have been funnier, had the very last line been: “It’s always been spiders.”

  • @TwixiMixiPixi
    @TwixiMixiPixi Před 4 měsíci +95

    One push sets the balls in motion!? now THAT is a button I want to push.

    • @malervik4176
      @malervik4176 Před 4 měsíci

      czcams.com/video/VSfdzVhhcWo/video.html

    • @davebruneau6068
      @davebruneau6068 Před 4 měsíci

      Yeah, no...thats the very last button my bare hand is ever gonna touch

  • @tuckerbowen4626
    @tuckerbowen4626 Před 4 měsíci +68

    i can't help but notice that they avoid mentioning what happens if you don't solve the coffin puzzle in 30 minutes

  • @jayabee
    @jayabee Před 4 měsíci +6

    I haven't seen anyone trapped in a claw machine since pillow guy on Kimmell

  • @merissaj4518
    @merissaj4518 Před 4 měsíci +68

    There is an allowable limit of insect matter in most foods, so we've probably already eaten cricket flour.

    • @RHCole
      @RHCole Před 4 měsíci +5

      Yup

    • @LazyIRanch
      @LazyIRanch Před 4 měsíci +6

      I ate a cricket on purpose once just to convince a creepy guy that I wasn't the girl for him.
      I'll never do it again, not because the cricket was nasty, but because... what if he had been turned on by me eating an insect? 😱
      Anyway, anyone who eats candy most likely is ingesting bug products.
      Carmine is a red dye used to create the red Skittles, Boston Baked Beans, and other red candies. Carmine is harvested from the cochineal scale insect.
      Don't eat the red ones? Sorry, but the shine on candy is usually Shellac, a wax secreted by the lac insect, Kerria lacca. Food grade shellac is often used as a coating to seal the food and prevent transfer of the color dyes from the candy to the skin.
      Personally, I'll take the bug secretions over chemical compounds I can't pronounce. At least the little critters are "all natural"! 🤪

    • @Hathur
      @Hathur Před 4 měsíci +7

      @@LazyIRanch I've tried roasted crickets, perfectly edible. Neither good tasting nor bad tasting. Just... bland. An insanely rich source of protein though, almost pure protein in a single cricket vs the 3% to 15% we get from animal meat.

    • @LazyIRanch
      @LazyIRanch Před 4 měsíci +11

      @@Hathur YES! It makes no sense that we AREN'T using insect protein for food as a matter of course. Other nations do!
      Funny thing happened to my uncle, who married a woman whose family is indigenous to Mexico. My uncle always raved about the delicious native foods his MIL cooked.
      One day, he told us how some natives of Mexico love to eat the Maguey larvae, either roasted or alive, and even though they're considered a delicacy he would _never_ try it!
      My Aunt Conchita looked at him quizzically and said, "Honey, you have eaten maguey worms MANY times! That red sauce my mother makes that you love so much is made from them!"
      I'm so glad this dialog took place during a family reunion so we could add this story to our family folklore. 😂

    • @thaisstone5192
      @thaisstone5192 Před 4 měsíci +1

      @@LazyIRanch Its huhu grubs in New Zealand.

  • @landonewts
    @landonewts Před 4 měsíci +8

    I’m extremely claustrophobic and not a fan of puzzle games. Never in a million years would I pay money to be locked in a coffin to solve puzzles. But if that’s your thing, have fun!

    • @arizonanative7409
      @arizonanative7409 Před 4 měsíci

      I’m with you. I can’t imagine doing that. I’d panic very quickly.

  • @igorschmidlapp6987
    @igorschmidlapp6987 Před 4 měsíci +18

    Nobody thought to get the arcade employee with the key to the very visible latch on the glass door (they do have to reload the plush toys, you know), rather than endanger the kid with broken glass?

    • @Jonathanizer
      @Jonathanizer Před 4 měsíci +3

      How do you endanger someone with what is clearly safety glass? What's next, endanger people with cotton balls and security blankets?
      Also how do you know nobody thought to get the guy with the key? Seems like the most likely scenario was, the guys or guys who open the thing were not readily available, they probably only come by once a week or so to service, restock and maintain, and they usually come outside of business hours. So instead of making a scared kid wait for hours on end inside a machine, they simply broke a window of safety glass, which can be replaced cheaply. They were probably much more keen on avoiding a lawsuit, then on saving a few bucks for a small glass window.

    • @leavingitblank9363
      @leavingitblank9363 Před 4 měsíci

      @@Jonathanizer TMI. (And it's "than", not "then".)

  • @jeancater1388
    @jeancater1388 Před 4 měsíci +4

    Toilet Turkey. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @mglenadel
    @mglenadel Před 4 měsíci +30

    "How do you smuggle in an apple?" Easy. You smuggle an apple seed. You plant it in a secluded corner of the yard. You water it everyday with water you smuggle out of the mess hall in your pockets. Depending on how long a stretch you still have, you'll have as much apple as you can bake with a 60-Watt bulb in a discarded soup can. Smuggling the soup can, though, can be a b*tch.

    • @oldpossum57
      @oldpossum57 Před 4 měsíci +4

      As Johnny Appleseed knew, that Apple will be sour, a cider apple.

    • @AR-ed3xw
      @AR-ed3xw Před 4 měsíci +2

      No soup can is easy, soup can seed!

    • @philster1883
      @philster1883 Před 4 měsíci

      "It's a good thing."--MS

    • @bunyipdragon9499
      @bunyipdragon9499 Před 4 měsíci

      😂😂

    • @rumpvirus7393
      @rumpvirus7393 Před 4 měsíci

      Pie is Like all you can eat in there ?
      Trump won't make a toilet turkey...
      ...but he looks like one.
      ...only the baste people.

  • @windmagus8573
    @windmagus8573 Před 4 měsíci +43

    As a father, I loved the High seas joke.

    • @mho...
      @mho... Před 4 měsíci +2

      beautiful, quiet shores all around

  • @SpaceForceCommander
    @SpaceForceCommander Před 4 měsíci +6

    There’s a child stuck inside a claw machine somewhere in the world about once every year.

  • @Nirrrina
    @Nirrrina Před 4 měsíci +9

    I'd take the shattered glass as a prize.
    I work with resin.

  • @ronjinks8932
    @ronjinks8932 Před 4 měsíci +19

    The image of toilet turkey will never escape my mind ...

    • @gleek781
      @gleek781 Před 4 měsíci +1

      Makes me think of the Bob Burgers ep where he keeps putting turkeys in his toilet. 😂🍔

    • @Echo81Rumple83
      @Echo81Rumple83 Před 4 měsíci

      then there's Jim (Patton Oswald) from SpongeBob SquarePants dumping every "failed" Krabby Patty SpongeBob was tryna get a critique on.

    • @paulklp8262
      @paulklp8262 Před 4 měsíci

      I was having breakfast 🤮

    • @Surge1077
      @Surge1077 Před 4 měsíci

      Just pair it with a good prison toilet wine and all will be fine?

  • @ukmediawarrior
    @ukmediawarrior Před 4 měsíci +41

    Leave it to the Aussies to break the glass of the game machine and risk hurting the kid rather than simply unlocking it and opening the door, LOL :D Mind you, you gotta ask, how the hell did the kid get in there in the first place?!

    • @regentvoo
      @regentvoo Před 4 měsíci +5

      Or how much it would cost to replace the glass. Seriously a stupid move.

    • @LazyIRanch
      @LazyIRanch Před 4 měsíci +3

      Breaking the glass is cheating! They should have told the kid to hold still and let the claw take him. It probably could have been accomplished with a roll of quarters, or two!

    • @thaisstone5192
      @thaisstone5192 Před 4 měsíci +1

      Yeah, maybe firemen should wait for the door to burn down first as well.

    • @Echo81Rumple83
      @Echo81Rumple83 Před 4 měsíci +4

      they're small enough and limber enough to do that. keep in mind, this is not the first time _A_ small kid has climbed into a claw game machine like that, and it won't be the last.

    • @jarrodbright5231
      @jarrodbright5231 Před 4 měsíci +7

      So as an Australian who is familiar with the situation they called the company who own the machine, who suggested trying to win the kid back. The police then smashed their way in and are charging the company for gross negligence.

  • @lazyperfectionist1
    @lazyperfectionist1 Před 4 měsíci +1

    4:33 "...while the world's _biggest_ escape room remains _Florida."_
    I would've sooner guessed _Siberia._

  • @Mahrac126
    @Mahrac126 Před 4 měsíci +5

    I feel like 'smuggled' is probably a strong word of what Martha Stewart did.
    Probably all of the guards knew and allowed it in exchange for their own food.

    • @leavingitblank9363
      @leavingitblank9363 Před 4 měsíci

      Seriously. It takes more than "smuggling" some food to make those creations. Unless she had an Easy Bake oven in her cell.

  • @RHCole
    @RHCole Před 4 měsíci +5

    "How do you smuggle in an apple?"
    The same way you bake it

  • @trenomas1
    @trenomas1 Před 4 měsíci +3

    Fuck yeah CRICKETS!

  • @SpaceForceCommander
    @SpaceForceCommander Před 4 měsíci +5

    “One push sets the balls in motion” is the type of public bathroom that Former Republican Senator Larry Craig really likes.

  • @amandahess151
    @amandahess151 Před 4 měsíci +3

    Meanwhile always makes my day

  • @kettlepunch9646
    @kettlepunch9646 Před 4 měsíci +4

    Kinda sad Steve missed Micheal Buble high on shrooms at the NHL all star game draft. The interview is pretty hilarious

  • @zuralani1
    @zuralani1 Před 4 měsíci +7

    I've eaten sour cream and onion crickets, i'd definitely give cricket flour a chance

  • @KissyKat
    @KissyKat Před 4 měsíci +1

    People have been baking with bugs in flour for centuries. This is just the first time anybody admitted to it😂

  • @nanyubusnis9397
    @nanyubusnis9397 Před 4 měsíci +10

    2:58 Great message they're sending. Hey kids, if you can climb into the machine, you get a free toy and ruin everyone else's day!

    • @xavmiz3070
      @xavmiz3070 Před 4 měsíci +2

      Any kid small enough to get in the machine, is likely too young to be affected by some "message" you think they are sending. Sheesh.

    • @nanyubusnis9397
      @nanyubusnis9397 Před 4 měsíci +3

      ​@@xavmiz3070 Then I guess kids are a lot smarter than you, because the message is simple: "Get in the machine, receive toy."
      That kid was smart enough reverse engineer his way inside. Which is a fancy way of saying: Understood where the toy would come out of, so he climbed in through there. Kids can very much figure out that a kid getting a toy after being saved means they too can do the same thing.

    • @BlueSpiritFire1
      @BlueSpiritFire1 Před 4 měsíci

      I'm unclear on whose day the kid ruined. He was retrieved safely, and I'm pretty sure our coppers would rather be called out to something like that than idk, a DV or car crash or something else particularly horrible. Plus, one of our news channels made a particularly brilliant piece about it called 'Claw and Order' that definitely gave people a chuckle. I don't think the kiddo will be going into a claw machine again after he was stuck in there for about an hour.

    • @Jonathanizer
      @Jonathanizer Před 4 měsíci

      @@nanyubusnis9397 The kid probably spent some time in that machine, whilst they were looking if they can get the guy who services the thing and has the key to come around. They probably only cracked the safety glass, when it became clear the guy was not readily available. Seems unlikely that you as a kid want to spent a significant part of your fun afternoon in such a place inside a machine, instead of playing with everything else, just to get one of the pretty lame toys. Also i don't know how that is supposed to be a "message", nobody is advertising this concept to the kids there, and i doubt the kid himself has significant reach to promote the "message" of him getting a reward for climbing in the machine, so there is no real danger of setting bad incentive structures, if the kids who go there don't know.
      This guy probably just wanted to appease the parents, and quash any idea of suing the place for having an unsafe machine and trapping/ terrifying their kid. Not saying such a suit would be justified, but even frivolous suits are a nuisance to deal with, and are costly even if won. And people have sued for much less, especially parents when it comes to their kids are often in the mindset "it's everybody elses fault". Or maybe he was just in a general "the customer is always right" mindset widespread in the service industry, where they constantly comp stuff when there is a problem (irregardless of who may be to blame). Maybe he wanted to avoid a bad online review by annoyed parents. Maybe he had all these things in mind when he diffuses the situation with a cheap gift.
      You know these toys are really cheap, right? They cost a few bucks, because the margins are really high, producing them costs a few cents per unit, and giving one of those toys to the kid after the incident was a smart move, it could prevent trouble at very low cost.

    • @nanyubusnis9397
      @nanyubusnis9397 Před 4 měsíci

      @@Jonathanizer Kids are smart, it's true. But it's not like they care about the cost of a toy they want, nor would this video indicate the kid didn't have a fun time in there like it's a fluffy bal pit. They're not seeing how long the kid spent in there, for all they know, this happened within 5 minutes.
      I don't get why you guys focus on "message" like it's some kind of political propaganda. Anything you do, sends a message, to people observing. Literally anything. Young kids are notoriously bad at thinking ahead. They just think about what's in front of them. If you grow up to have a child of your own, one day you're going to drop him/her off at school for the first time. Most of the time, they will cry. Why? Because it looks like you're leaving them. No amount of "I'll be back" will cheer them up. They're either going to have to find something they think is fun there, or you're going to have to leave at some point, but they will get over it.
      Here the message kids of that age get if they saw the video, is exactly what it looks like. If kids see precedent of kids getting toys after getting stuck, there definitely will be kids who imitate. Have any of you ever had kids?
      @BlueSpiritFire1 No not the cops day. They were just doing their job. Think about the parents worrying about their child. I'm sure they weren't afraid to lose him, but the longer it takes the more nervous you get, and you can bet they got nervous when they said "We're gonna have to break the glass." I know if done right, there's little to no danger, but it's night impossible to calm down a nervous mother.
      Finally, come on you silly people! It's a freaking joke! What kid of that age watches *the news* ?! Are you guys really this fired up about the word "message" ? The only kids you'd have to worry about would be the hand full of kids there that saw the rescue, and probably not even them, because they would most likely have seen the kid stuck in there, maybe even crying at first.
      The joke here, is, as any *parent* can relate, that kids don't think ahead, and will b-line it to the nearest toy, be it 50 cents or a 5k toy car they can drive in. We love our kids, and their mistakes are endeering, and it's all part of learning to grow up. Learning to think ahead. I don't think that kid would do this again either, unless the rescue was within some 10 minutes. Then it's up to the parents to make sure they learn not to do that.

  • @whizthesugoi
    @whizthesugoi Před 4 měsíci +2

    I can't believe Italy has begun using cricket powder before me
    I have been waiting for it for 5 years now :(

  • @JamesCalbraith
    @JamesCalbraith Před 4 měsíci +4

    She smuggled the baked apple inside a cake.

  • @mikeharrison1868
    @mikeharrison1868 Před 4 měsíci +2

    Crickets are just land shrimp!

  • @TighelanderII
    @TighelanderII Před 4 měsíci +1

    Stephen is the King of the "Vurp."

  • @wtf1185
    @wtf1185 Před 4 měsíci +3

    This was the best Meanwhile in a while.

  • @arothmanmusic
    @arothmanmusic Před 4 měsíci +3

    Fun Fact: There have been ground up arthropods in flour as long as there's been flour. Now there will just be more.

  • @SpaceForceCommander
    @SpaceForceCommander Před 4 měsíci +6

    1:40 Meanwhile starts.

  • @brandonminkos6518
    @brandonminkos6518 Před 4 měsíci +3

    The biggest escape room is north korea😮

  • @VianneyCreates
    @VianneyCreates Před 4 měsíci +5

    There has to be some kind of joke about the crickets and Jiminy Cricket… I mean Pinocchio is an Italian story, right?

  • @yours09trully
    @yours09trully Před 3 měsíci

    I love your upbeat attitude and stylish mood. #1 in presentation, charisma, show business.

  • @yurielcundangan9090
    @yurielcundangan9090 Před 4 měsíci +47

    Gotta love Colbert. He got guts

    • @mglenadel
      @mglenadel Před 4 měsíci +8

      He has a little bit less guts since that whole appendix debacle.

    • @lindaswanson9328
      @lindaswanson9328 Před 4 měsíci

      You nissed your chance to say "balls". 😂

  • @miketaylor1211
    @miketaylor1211 Před 4 měsíci +4

    One of your best meanwhile in a while. Coffin date great for valentines day.

  • @misterzombieman
    @misterzombieman Před 4 měsíci +3

    Waiter nauseated by food lol

  • @ThizzRyuko
    @ThizzRyuko Před 4 měsíci +1

    4:41 I'm in that escape room,HELP!

  • @ella17734
    @ella17734 Před 4 měsíci +1

    😂Do not teach that kid that the way to get the prize is by climbing into a space you're not allowed to and waiting for someone to rescue you! That said, I'm happy he's ok.

    • @Jonathanizer
      @Jonathanizer Před 4 měsíci

      It's such an absurd scenario, and the kid was probably scared, i think we can forgo thinking about setting bad incentive structures here. Also the "teachable moment" is the parents job, the worker probably just wanted to diffuse the situation and minimize the chance of a bad review, lawsuit or whatever.

  • @liberalsockpuppet4772
    @liberalsockpuppet4772 Před 4 měsíci +2

    I skip the interviews, I watch Meanwhile.

  • @eco2geek.
    @eco2geek. Před 4 měsíci +1

    "How do you smuggle in an apple?"
    Don't ask, Stephen.

  • @LocoCoyote
    @LocoCoyote Před 4 měsíci +7

    Hey! Cricket flour is awesome. It has a light nutty flavor. Makes a great bread.

    • @moonhunter9993
      @moonhunter9993 Před 4 měsíci

      yeah, crickets are supposed to be yummy. Eaten in Africa.

    • @DuchessofEarlGrey
      @DuchessofEarlGrey Před 4 měsíci +1

      I hope it's made out of giant crickets. They're so small here, you'd have to kill thousands to make a loaf of bread.

  • @artistpoet5253
    @artistpoet5253 Před 4 měsíci +1

    3:43 please say, "Yes. That long pause after the turkey joke was in honor of the South Park episode featuring Stewart."

  • @Arion661
    @Arion661 Před 4 měsíci +2

    I like that he shouts out After Midnight

  • @seacalgal3618
    @seacalgal3618 Před 4 měsíci +2

    Love it Mr Grouchy was there 🎉

  • @LillikoiSeed
    @LillikoiSeed Před 4 měsíci +2

    “How do you smuggle in an apple?” You be Martha Stewart. Least cringe- worthy answer.

  • @Bruno-ns7gm
    @Bruno-ns7gm Před 4 měsíci +5

    Ask about our all new creepy crawly stuffed crust with a free side of our heavenly praying mantis dipping sauce !!!

  • @Kane0123
    @Kane0123 Před 4 měsíci +6

    Classic throwback to the queasy waiters skit

  • @justincredible.
    @justincredible. Před 4 měsíci

    Steven rules the late shows, he's the best by far!

  • @CaesarBro
    @CaesarBro Před 4 měsíci +1

    Next segment should be Stephen eating roasted crickets from the local Oaxacan restaurant.

  • @DrUFO___bytch
    @DrUFO___bytch Před 3 měsíci

    his intros are finally crafted wordsmithing into random aspects of life are such a great inspiration for anyone who comes to America regardless of what language it is that we all speak no the language to understand how witty and humorous and fun and open minded and culturally diverse those intros really are.

  • @darkskyinwinter
    @darkskyinwinter Před 4 měsíci +2

    When you see "112 bags of marijuana" and just instantly know "4oz."

    • @corvos3719
      @corvos3719 Před 3 měsíci

      How small were the bags you pictured? It was 158 pounds of pot.

  • @erik365365365
    @erik365365365 Před 4 měsíci +2

    When your a Kentucky maga loving 60 year old and the best thing in your life is a gas station bathroom 😂

  • @luannnelson547
    @luannnelson547 Před 4 měsíci +1

    Spatulating? LOL

  • @Imnotplayinganymore
    @Imnotplayinganymore Před 4 měsíci +2

    I've been eating crickets for years. They're delish!

  • @granmahurt3397
    @granmahurt3397 Před 4 měsíci +2

    My grandson got inside one of those machines too, but his mum was able to coax him back out again through the prize return. We thought it was just an Alex thing. (Maybe it's endemic to Australia, .😂)

  • @igorschmidlapp6987
    @igorschmidlapp6987 Před 4 měsíci +1

    After escaping from the coffins, you clean up in side-by-side bathtubs... ;-P

  • @FalloutJack
    @FalloutJack Před 4 měsíci +1

    Stephen: Baked apple. How do you smuggle in an apple?
    Me: Well, you see, she had one already prepared from earlier, like in the show. 😁

  • @greenthumb8266
    @greenthumb8266 Před 4 měsíci +2

    Did they really have to shatter glass to rescue that child? I mean the thing must open somewhere to refill it with stuffed animals. I’ll bet the top opens.

  • @christianekoval5892
    @christianekoval5892 Před 4 měsíci +1

    The world's biggest escape room is Earth.

  • @gus.smedstad
    @gus.smedstad Před 4 měsíci +1

    When I was a small child, my father used to tell me that grocery store frozen pizza was contaminated with insect parts. In hindsight, maybe he just wanted to stop us asking for it.

    • @Taurusus
      @Taurusus Před 4 měsíci

      He's not wrong, in fact he's probably underselling it. There's a touch of insect in _just about everything!_

    • @Jonathanizer
      @Jonathanizer Před 4 měsíci +1

      You said "contaminated", i say "seasoned"

  • @OscarLangleySoryu
    @OscarLangleySoryu Před 4 měsíci +67

    "How do you smuggle in an apple?"
    It's a womens' prison, Stephen.

    • @XiaoGuanYin104
      @XiaoGuanYin104 Před 4 měsíci +5

      It would have to be a small apple...

    • @gladtravis
      @gladtravis Před 4 měsíci +6

      This would killed on the show if Taylor Tomlinson just popped out of nowhere to say your line!

    • @MachaMongRuad
      @MachaMongRuad Před 4 měsíci +8

      😂@@XiaoGuanYin104 You haven't been on the internet long, have you? 😂

    • @RHCole
      @RHCole Před 4 měsíci +1

      The same way you bake it

    • @jeanwilson9925
      @jeanwilson9925 Před 4 měsíci +3

      So....in a handbag?

  • @kappatvating
    @kappatvating Před 4 měsíci

    Best opening segment always.

  • @smokinlouie9885
    @smokinlouie9885 Před 4 měsíci +2

    Papa Johns has already been using insects in the pizza.

  • @CAP198462
    @CAP198462 Před 4 měsíci +17

    Arthropod flour, that’s definitely not cricket.

    • @colleenforrest7936
      @colleenforrest7936 Před 4 měsíci +6

      Actually, cricket flour is pretty good and a healthy source of protein 😊

    • @mycosys
      @mycosys Před 4 měsíci +8

      If you eat sea cockroaches, aka shrimp, you are already WAY past that point

    • @mikeharrison1868
      @mikeharrison1868 Před 4 měsíci

      Ouch! 😅

    • @crptnite
      @crptnite Před 4 měsíci +4

      ​@@mycosysactually lobster is the cockroach of the sea. Shrimp are more like sea termites.

    • @crptnite
      @crptnite Před 4 měsíci

      ​@@colleenforrest7936so is hemp seed flour and it never used to be a bug, so...

  • @Leah_Newton
    @Leah_Newton Před 4 měsíci +1

    I heard them chanting "Jesus! Jesus! Jesus! Jesus! Jesus!" 😂

  • @rileyfuckingrifle
    @rileyfuckingrifle Před 4 měsíci +13

    Right on Italy. Entomophagy is based.

  • @user-li5wv8is4i
    @user-li5wv8is4i Před 4 měsíci

    Stephen,Stephen,Stephen..as president!!! 🎉😂🎉

  • @craigjohnson4182
    @craigjohnson4182 Před 4 měsíci +1

    Martha Stewart smuggled in a baked apple pie disguised as a large nail file.

  • @antonyhurst9151
    @antonyhurst9151 Před 4 měsíci

    That is exactly what I thought people in Kentucky would act like with a news camera present 😂

  • @StevenTorrey
    @StevenTorrey Před 4 měsíci +2

    "Press the button, set your balls in motion." Do you really want to be there?
    "High seas"? You really paid your staff to write that joke?
    Terrible mitzu.....

    • @Jonathanizer
      @Jonathanizer Před 4 měsíci +1

      The "high seas" is a class A dad joke. I like it^^

  • @DragonFae16
    @DragonFae16 Před 4 měsíci +4

    Look, just think of eating crickets as eating the crabs or shrimp of the land. At least, that's what I tell myself I'll think of if I ever have to try some.

    • @charityquill4965
      @charityquill4965 Před 4 měsíci

      We've all most likely have already consumed insects in any bread/flour products, because there is an "acceptable level of insects" when the grain is harvested. Honestly it would be near impossible to grow enough grain/wheat without any bugs hidden in the fields.

  • @erents1
    @erents1 Před 4 měsíci

    OMFNG! The gift of gab! You got it Stephen!

  • @WildTalksNatureWalks
    @WildTalksNatureWalks Před 4 měsíci

    Damn good sir, love that tie!

  • @deeanthony7713
    @deeanthony7713 Před 4 měsíci +1

    JERRY, JERRY, JERRY....Oh, I forgot....I mean: Stephen, Stephen, Stephen!!!!!!!

  • @DescubriendoLaFlorida
    @DescubriendoLaFlorida Před 4 měsíci +1

    I can confirm that every time I want to restock my claw machine, I break the glass.

    • @Jonathanizer
      @Jonathanizer Před 4 měsíci

      If you want to wait for the service guy who comes by once a week for the machine, and is probably not readily available, and let the kid be stuck in there for hours on end, rather than break a window of cheap safety glass, then you are probably okay with (at best) the kid peeing all over your merch whilst waiting, or (at worst) getting sued by the parents for trapping and terrifying their kid.

    • @tweaker1bms
      @tweaker1bms Před 4 měsíci

      @@Jonathanizer whatever happened to Locksmiths?

    • @Jonathanizer
      @Jonathanizer Před 4 měsíci

      @@tweaker1bms You do realize, that is more expensive than just breaking a single window of safety glass and have that replaced by the vendor that services these machines, right?
      In most places, locksmiths take high rates for even just appearing, and then it's not even clear if he has the specialized equipment for this machine. Most locksmiths do house doors, maybe car doors or stand alone locks, but the mechanism for this machine might be a non-standard key/lock. Also a locksmith might still take an hour or two to appear, you really want to keep that kid in there for so long? That's guaranteed to antagonize the family, and risk negative consequences.
      So, there are locksmiths, but this is not a good option here for many potential reasons.

  • @amarbyrd2520
    @amarbyrd2520 Před 4 měsíci +1

    Band was hot 🔥 tonight!

  • @BuildinWings
    @BuildinWings Před 4 měsíci

    Italy - You never get to judge anyone's food ever again.

  • @serendipityshopnyc
    @serendipityshopnyc Před 4 měsíci

    Two things I love about Stephen Colbert: 1) that horking-up-a-hairball noise he makes when discussing an unappetizing new foodstuff, and 2) the fact that his comic timing was just about as good when he had no audience or only a handful in the storage closet during COVID, as it is with a full live audience. Long may he have the latter!

  • @krisfrederick5001
    @krisfrederick5001 Před 4 měsíci +1

    I've been using claw machines wrong all my life...mistakes were made 🤦🏼‍♂

  • @SpaceForceCommander
    @SpaceForceCommander Před 4 měsíci +1

    If you want cocaine on a cruise ship, a package is bound to float past off Florida. Just bring a hook to fish it out of the water.

  • @modavies8401
    @modavies8401 Před 4 měsíci +1

    To the x ray machines that used to be used in UK prisons, Semtex looks just the same texture as an apple. So, to smuggle Semtex, roll is into an apple shape. Maybe she was making a Semtex Pie?

  • @SpaceForceCommander
    @SpaceForceCommander Před 4 měsíci +5

    So, freedom is not enough of a prize for a child stuck inside a claw machine…

    • @Jonathanizer
      @Jonathanizer Před 4 měsíci +1

      It probably is, for the kid. The worker however just wanted to make sure not to get a bad review, lawsuit or whatever. You know how some parents are, when it comes to their kids, its everybody elses fault, "not little jimmys fault he got trapped and terrified in that machine". The toys they have there are mass produced garbage, it costs a few cent per unit to produce, and bad online reviews or a lawsuit are a nuisance to deal with. Smart move by the worker, and also completely common in the service industry to comp stuff, whenever there is a problem, irregardless of who cause the problem.

  • @deborahkogan8742
    @deborahkogan8742 Před 4 měsíci

    So good!

  • @sharihazlett3774
    @sharihazlett3774 Před 4 měsíci

    Love this

  • @mikemcconeghy4658
    @mikemcconeghy4658 Před 4 měsíci

    I've had some of the worst times of my life in restrooms. Hard to imagine an experience that could top some of the best times in my life.

    • @tweaker1bms
      @tweaker1bms Před 4 měsíci

      The disco bathroom becomes your worst experience if you give it enough time. ("Help I'm stuck and they won't stop playing the Bee Gees!")

  • @simgem
    @simgem Před 4 měsíci

    Bug flour and whole bugs have been legal to sell for human consumption in the US for a while. You can get barbecue seasoned crickets, cotton candy flavored crickets, cricket protein bars, chocolate covered crickets, and cricket flour, not to mention other insects, arachnids, and worms

  • @OfficialMrGrouchy
    @OfficialMrGrouchy Před 4 měsíci

    Ayeeeee I see me 😂😂😂😂

  • @stumccannel9675
    @stumccannel9675 Před 4 měsíci

    I'm Disco Stu and I approve of this message!

  • @thetowerstillstands
    @thetowerstillstands Před 4 měsíci +1

    Breathe, Stephen 😂

  • @guilletrovato9226
    @guilletrovato9226 Před 4 měsíci

    Amen to Florida joke!

  • @ryanconsultingllc3177
    @ryanconsultingllc3177 Před 3 měsíci

    Carny gobstopper of news... classic!¡

  • @choosehope8729
    @choosehope8729 Před 4 měsíci

    TiramisUUUUGH😂😂😂