Namskar sir Really heart touching practical behaviour of parents. Their ambitions never end,the son who achieved better'position with hard work has to support till he alive,the nalayak other sons expects financial support. The reality in the society, explained well.The points are to be discussed and forwarded to families Thanks sir
One point u missed here, sometimes parents dominate marriage decision of their good son completely in order to satisfy their ego in society. leading to tremendous sadness to son and calling it sons fate if son is unhappy after marriage
I am female, working as Director in Govt. department. My in-laws and their other relatives never recognized me as an officer. Because they allwere group C . My father in law introduce me as 'she is assistant director' Why our society never admire strong woman as bahu. Now I am 54 . But still I get annoyed with their peculier attitude. All other female members of the family are housewives and although I am better in household duties and take male responsibilities , they admire mediocre bahus. What is this phenomena?? I wonder.
They are useless jealous people. Stay away from them and keep interactions to minimum. Many middle class people will not give any credit to working bahu but enjoy her income
Its jealousy ma'am ...........for happiness......ignore them.........don't give this thoughts place in memory.........ultimately life never promised it gone be fair...........
I can relate this to my father's life. He dedicated large chunk of his life for taking care of parents and siblings, and later was thrown out by same peoole.
I strongly recommend to never reveal your entire salary to anyone, not even your spouse. If at all you wish to be honest, tell your monthly salary after tax deduction and EPF+VPF deduction and other tax savings methods you may use such as PPF or home/education loan. So if you get 1 lakh/month on paper, tell your salary as maybe 70,000 or 75,000 per month (after tax and tax saving deductions). Always underplay your salary. This becomes even more crucial when your parents have a habit of revealing your life to their relatives and friends.
It's very tough to hide income from wife as in digital age u get msg of every transaction but one thing you can do it invest your money in property gold sip stocks anywhere after keeping a lumsum money of at least 5 to 10 lakhs in bank for emergency, and always keep crying before your wife that you don't have money left after investment .
Yes I am a 35 year old female I am a chartered accountant I started working for good salary from the age of 25 My mom postponed my marriage till I was 32 with greed to swindle my income along with my younger brother While her son got married at 28 while he is 20% salary compared to me It is absolutely true
Are to aap love marriage kar lena tha. Par arrange marriage me to aapka shoshan hi hota. Job k sath bohot aur torture bhi bardaasht karna padta maa to phir bhi achhi hoti hai aap kanhi ja k dekho working women ki halat bhi bohot kharab hoti hai sasuraal mai torture zyada hota hai sasural ma compared to mauka. Kuch 10 %ko achhe family mile hai baaki ro rahe hai sab
I can relate to this sir. But the problem is its too late now. I was on a same guilt trip and wanted to become provider for my family whatever I could. Now I am 38 and yet single. My parents didn't approve my relationship with my GF. Now everyone is settled in their lives, and I am alone and depressed, cursing my life everyday. And the fun part is my younger siblings don't care much and don't contribute much yet they are more close to my parents than me, because I could not deliver up to the expectations.
Expectations are endless. Stay away from them and start your life now. It is not too late. The more you are near them the more you will be living in guilt.
Bhai jb aap khud khush rahoge tabhi dusro ko kudh kr paoge , start your journey if it's giving you joyful & happy life . wish you a very happy life ❤️ & god gave you strength to overcome your problems
There is not even a single person on internet who can talk on topics like this. Tremendous work sir... Ek ek baat sachhi hai in your every video. Please write a book sir on these kinds of teachings.
@@debaprasad9379 stop watching one kind of content, try everything even if you don't know what it is. I'm not saying to force yourself to watch something else but have a mindset of trying something new everyday.
This is my father ... my mother was also working ... Both did their best to uplift their respective families ... But it ruined our life ... My sister n me r extremely bitter with both sides of families n don't want to get married ever ... Relatives r the biggest burden
Same here, my parents did well for me not for my cousins. If his parents are unable yo provide them the life I am getting I am the privileged one not him. And then once I deny being ATM I am the bad one. Then let me be bad one now.
Is comment section m ek v ladki Nhi dekhige yhi problem h Jb EQUALITY ki bat ati h SALA EK LADKI KO UKRAINE NA CHODNE KA PAVANDI NHI LAGA HALA KI LADKE KM H LADKIO S .... BEST H SHADI MY KRO.....
We all should understand parents r selfish. They don't care about future of their children. My sister is also falling in their trap n destroying her life.
My selfish cunning mom want me to work like serveht for her fav daughter she is brate now nothing no talent only fair and beautiful that everyone like. But i m dusky less beautiful but attractive highr iq level love studying highly ambitious and multi-talented. But got no support from faimly. She want me to be house wife stop being ambitious individuals and book warm . all those quality she want put in my young sister .i m happy and free from future responsibility i will never come home once i m succeed in life
@@shwetathakur4707 please try to stay away and keep some distance with her and don't leave your goal otherwise you'll lost yourself in her hands.. I'm also seeing these types of situations..
I found it very much relatable with that of my father's life. He was the good boy of the family and our uncles are earning way less salary and respect than him. But he never got close with our grandmother but our uncles did and ultimately because of the tension in family he suffered from serious illness which ultimately took his life. You were on point sir.
This video should be circulated to all Indian families. It's so important that lot of youngsters gets into the trap of Seva. The life becomes so miserable that so many losses the conference and dumped by their own family.
Yup, but after sharing with anyone, most people with narrow minded will make comments to me like I'm being brainwashed with this or I'm getting away from Indian tradition and been influenced by western one. It's too complex bro
@@ygp47 I don't understand after getting married what's the role of parents. They should be only be in advisory role. After having 2 children and 17 years of marriage my mother still made me emotionally black mail to leave everything and take care of her. I emotional fool did it and now regretting. The damage has happened and no way I can fixed it.
👏👏👏👏 Nobody talks about these topics the way you do! I went through this scenario for around 20 years, got depressed, had many sessions for 10 months or so with a psychologist to learn to say “STOP I CANT DO MORE, I HAVE A PERSONAL AND FAMILY LIFE ALSO “ things got improved gradually…
My arranged marriage was the same. I belong to Rich family but got married to the below poverty line family bcoz my husband is Good, Simple and earning well. After marriage they forced me to leave my job as there was no need for such. And once I left the job, I found he was in debt 5 times of his salary. He cannot say No to his parents kyunki bahut takleef dekhi h un logo ne. I faced so many problems till I got another job. Still problems are there but at least I have some savings for my survival 😊
@saumyasrivastava If you are belonging to rich family it doesn't mean your father property belongs to you. Go check 100 houses ask hey girl did your parents give property to you. Answer is no. Then what is the point saying you are belonging to rich family. In reality men getting injustice
I am from IIT and in the industry for 7 years. I can vouch that it's all true. Thanks to my father, he maintained a register. I used to hate him for that in the beginning but later that turned out to be a saviour from lot of disputes.
@@shrishri8898 bhai life ka koi hard and fast rule nahi hota aaj kal degree ki value nahi hai skills ki job hai.Mere sath ke pade hue bilkul low grade college se aaj 20 lakh ke package par hai
The video is amazing sir.. and great life lessons.. my life is also a very similar ...I am 45 and divorced now.. and my parents are no more..my advise to younger people , please take care of your life as a first priority.. don't be too good and try to make every one happy.. people will use you as a colour pencil to make their life colourful.. you must find a good paying career , a loving wife, have children , house and have connection with God.. you will find people who emotionally make you feel guilty , be very careful.. people you trust and love most will betray you..
@upworkprofileevideonoorula No loving wife in reality, girls simply select boy based on salary, property, height, professional status. Girls treat man ATM machine
Feeling lucky to be born in a good family. My father act harsh on me only to make me work more hard and become successful. He has already enough savings to live like king along with his govt. pension therefore he has no greed for money. Only thing he wants to see is me standing on my own feet.
One thing i understood from this session is that never reveal your income , not even to your parents, if you're earning 30lakh pa tell them it's 20 and save the surplus.... As he said it all comes down to money, maintain a register for expenses of all sorts because only you are responsible for your future and happiness and no one else ....
especially not reveal to spouse, especially woman should take care of their finances, giving everything to husband landed my friend empty handed and divorced recently
100% accurate.. I was that boy ( I don't know how much good) .. But I had done a lot of return after I started doing bit better in jobs.. I kept handling full families expenses.. However.. I had my eyes opened already due to God given wisdom, high justice loving nature and my wife's advice, I turned back at right time. Did investment on myself and my immediate family..Your advice is reassurance that I am on right track. You are doing very great service by giving advice in art of managing family and setting all expectations correctly. What a wonderful niche you selected.. Thank you so much for being like Guru.
I am 22 hailing from a small town in Bihar currently pursuing mbbs and brought up in lower middle class family..i hope I get the courage to send this video to my mother..your videos are such an eye opener
This is why I isolated myself from everyone (family, friends, etc.) once I became rich and started maintaining a low profile and pretend like I am just making enough money to make ends meet. No parents, no siblings, no relatives, no friends, no wife, no partners, no children. I am enjoying everything myself as I earned it all by myself! ;)
I'm planning the same, don't want kids and wife, I'll just enjoy my life, travel, meet new people, try their culture, instead of being miserable with a boring sad life, investing all my money on kids.
Same thing happened with my father who had started to earn at the age of 16 and made a house for the family . My other uncle's though haven't done much but they are taking equal shares in property and after doing so much he hasn't got anything other than criticism from all.
Bhai same mere dad ke saath hua hai my dad started and established gold silver jewellery business and he is gave many gold silver to my uncle and also gave to two elder brother of him and all three had never returned anything to my dad even uncle toh ghr ka kharcha bhi nhi uthate my dad had paid their kid's school fee upto 12th also and the properties my dad bought also my uncle's are demanding.. I'm seeing my dad's sacrifice for family and my both uncle are just enjoying life with my dad's Money
@millionaire bro then did you or your father tok cunsoltation or not? Exp and good Cunsoltants can change ur father life, do u know(sorry for that kind of english)
True insights 👌. Some parents are pressurising their good boys even after more than 10 or 15 years of marriage of their sibling for monetary helping them. And they themselves are fully supporting their nikkama child by all power and will. What about the life of good boy?
Sangwanji should be a guest lecturer at various universities all over the country to impart these precious life lessons to students so that they can make this country and society a better place to live in
Uncle how can you be so right and to the point in all topics. I have seen my friend suffering as his wife who is also doctor and has no father, she is doing everything for her mother and siblings at the stake for her marriage. My friend doesn't ask her income but to start family as he is already 38 but she doesn't want to think of kids till she settles down her siblings and her family is emotionally controlling her. Another patient of mine is working 15 hours after domestic violence in marriage and divorce. But even after working so hard for mother and brother they dont care. So many times parents put emotions trap and the obedient kid suffers. Hopefully parents understand that kids are not their lottery.
Biggest irony is that in coperate 50 lpa package is 1 to 1.5 lakh in hand not 30 lakhs mnc package are calculated in so much vague that 4 year stocks are calculated in single year CTC and package is inflated
Loved the topic sir ! Thouy i am not from a service class community, but can totally understand the complexity of this situation. As you always say - your topics are really interesting & true to life . They are preparing me for my future. Thank you so much.
True 👍 आपने बिल्कुल भी extreem नहीं बताया है, ऐसा लगा कि मेरे husband की ही story है, और बिल्कुल उन्होंने जॉब लगने के 10 साल तक शादी नहीं की,but शादी के बाद मेरे साथ हुए behaviour से एहसास हुआ कि घर वाले शादी नहीं करना चाहते थे, और हमारी शादी को 14 साल हो गए हैं husbsnd को आज भी एहसास नहीं है, उनके भाई बहनों की लाइन ही इतनी लंबी है कि खत्म ही नहीं होती
Sir In your 3 rd Happiness course I during query time asked u one question. It is very similar to my situation. I am very relieved from this guilt trip now. I face emotional blackmail of my parents with logic and my comments are more articulate. I will watch it atleast 10 times more. Your effort is very visionary.. its benefits can be seen in long term when sukoon and stability comes in life. Relations remain entact by following ur advice. Your video why beta bahu should not live with in laws was legendary in my opinion. I am thankful I found u before I turn age 30. My pressure of doing good in sarkari naukari is also relieved. Ckakki peasing aaraam sai aur aanch ko kam kar do has given ultimate sukoon to me. Your advice is doing more good in society than all other reforms, as you are addressing issues which no one is discussing but where actually the root cause of problems lie. Regards
Hi sir ..u logics are life changing material. Pls make a vedio where mother in law has done a job through out her whole life but now bahu she wants job less just to take care of child , her family n relatives. This is my real life issue ..now m having two kids but doing nothing. If I want to raise my life again on track then she again n again interferes my decision n tells my husband very humbly that my husband always belive his mother not me. Wahi ghisa pita excuse ki bache kon dekhega ..n she's very smart enough to cover her evil feelings for me.
If you desire to do job, work on getting it otherwise your life will be hell in regret and frustration ,Even can give you mental issues in future My sister had same situation but she resisted second child,and now his son is 10 and she has joined the job,it helps her socialise,and be happy otherwise life as housewife can be frustratingly boring for many
Exactly the story of my life … high earning of my husband is actually a curse … his parents are just after his money … hamare beech kabhi understanding unhone banne nahi di …. Most times I feel better hota ek normal earning wale se shaadi hoti … dono husband wife mil ke kamate aur achi life jeete
@@Jaihindurashtra1igh earning has no limit. Jitna high utna hi kaam lagta hain. But for benchmark like I think, you can be having 1year or more emergency fund, not worrying about electricity bill and stuffs, can alot 5%-10% of your income to buy things for fun or out of need without worrying about savings, 20-40k phone looks very normal budget to you. And many more.
Very well explained. Mainly the closing remarks. Really appreciate you sharing your views with all of us. Respect from my heart. 🙏 I get to learn many practical things from you.
Excellent analysis of this very common problem in our society. Sometimes parents and other family members put so many demands on the person doing well that one almost begins to wish that one were less successful 😀😀
Correct. The family members like brothers and their wife want to have equality in the money of the person who is achieving more. Very popular saying in family " gharwalo ke liye kamana h. Gharwalo ke liye karna h. Gharwalo me aram talb bhai , nikama bhai , bahut saukin bhai aur uski bibi aur bache bhi shamil hote h" ye bhi bola jata h ek ko hoga dusre ko nhi hoga. Kisne kaha h mat karo. Tum bhi karo apne dum per karo dusro per kyu bojh dal rahe ho
@@chandrabhushan8597 vai dekh sidhi bat sidha sadha ladka h apni ma bap k lie v ji skta h sidhi bat shadi krne ki zarurat nhi hai...... Sare ladko ko shadi krne k chakkar m wat lag jati h.... Dekho do chiz na Koi ideology shi h na hi Satya h shadi Mt kro agar ache ladke ho to agar utne bole vale nhi ho to kro
Actually. And the demands doesn't end when a sibling especially daughter gets married. When this daughter comes to Mayka for 15-20 days, the food, fun, travel, gifts for all the her family etc. expenses are more than monthly expenditure.. 😢 The good son and the obedient Bahu has to make extra budget for that.. These parents want to go on trips, relatives in foreign countries invite them out of respect. Now they want their son to do all the expenses... Because they are dependent.. The good boy son doesn't take foreign trips himself as he wants to save for his own old age.. 🤦🏼♀️😂
As a first time would be mom, I always think, what is the the right way. Kaha galti hui hai? Kisse hui hai aur mai kaise us galti ko apne bacche ke saath hone se rok sakti hun. How can we break this cycle? Maine ye video dekhn start hi is intention se kiya ki I will learn how to not let being good a curse on my son (if I have a son). Very helpful. I absolutely agree. Bacche hume kucch owe nahi karte. Mai Aaj keh rahi hun. Aaj se 30 saal baad bhi kahungi. We bring them into this world, we spend on their studies or give them the best we can for our own selfish reasons. That selfish reason can be love for our blood or our own desire to look good parents in the eyes of the society. Koi bhi insaan kahi door kisi anjaan ke naam pe paisa bhej de, use padha likha de, aur fir ummid kare ki maine kiya toh mujhe milna chahiye, toh shayad fair hai. Aur tab nahi mil raha toh aapne invest karne se pehle offer documents thik se padhe nahi. Bacchon ko apne budhaape ki laathi banana chhorna parega. Nahi toh woh bas kaath ke hi ho ke reh jaayenge. Ye chaahte ho apne jigar ke tukde se toh fir karo. Lage raho.
Ma ke naam ki property ladki nhi le sakti, aur ladki apne naam ki hui property se nikal sakti hai sabko, so be careful. Not a sensible decision to take peoperty on girls name, buying property on girls name is not the gensture to show love
I have experienced the same. But whenever I have tried to convey/explain the same as a son, I was always be seen as mean by others including the parents. Thanks for sharing the video.
My husband is going through this I feel bad try not to fight but when I see injustice towards us from family I try to stop him 😢I love him and want him to be proud always .
This has blown my mind. Every sentence makes sence and is so practical. Yup in today's world, there are most of videos of about how to get successful.... How get to that last ladder of success but when people reach their, they have all knowledge about Professional stuff but never thought of what will happen to his social life when he gets along with it.
sir your videos are very insightful, you are only guru in my life so far, dint have anyone to give me advice or life lessons ever in life, you are the first person to provide these lessons, thanks to what you are doing, request to make a video guiding single persons in their life forward, we have no direction, no family for whom we need to earn, especially single woman have no security/support etc and life seems hell at times, but we want to find that one thing that keeeps going and gives motivation
Awesome video. I wish this eye opener video released like 10 years ago. For all young lower middle class good boys/girls, which are moving to higher middle class, this is a treasure.
So relatable to my husband. My in laws did all things as you said. Dudh ka karz and all things set in my husband's mind. Even after doing so many things, these parents demanding to return son's degree. They threw us out of family. Never be too good to anyone.
Yes this must be happening in NCR or any other part of India but my parents never ask for any financial or physical help till now to improve their living standards. Their age is more then 70 years and upto now they have very high moral & self respect. They are from Chamoli Uttarakhand 🙏 hope you understand my feelings. Otherwise video is very authentic and pathfinder but there must be some different aspects of any situation
Sir you are the only one hope to the emotional health of youth. Indian youth is actually reparenting themselves in adulthood because of the traumatized childhood we had. Everything is not fault of our parents because they are product of their upbringing but it is actually good that today's youth is trying not to take that trauma to next generation by reparenting themselves. Tbh my parents are very good. But I see such examples everywhere..in fact my own father is the example of this phenomenon. He was the topper, always successful one earning for us but my grandparents are closer to the sons who are living with them.
Hi sir, i follow ur insightful releases on and off. Ur viewpoints are relevant, realistic, and ofcourse the harsh truths! Thanks so much. Saving them all for my kid. I have gotten acces to them in my 30s, not too late, but young adults will definitely benefit more
Mushkil ye hai ki aise ache ladke apne ap ke khud hi dushman hote hai inko biwi samjhati hai ki apne paise sambhal ke do kisi ko to biwi hi inko dushman lagti hai villain lagti hai ki mere gharwalo ke liye aise bol rahi hai ,aur inke ma baap bhai behan in par hi sari responsibility dal dete hai ,inke apne bacho ke liye kuch bachta nahi ,jab kharab time ata hai inka tab koi inko nikal ke deta nahi
Each and every word is true Sir. Indian parents make the good boys do everything for them monthly expenses,gifts,marriages, new home etc their siblings and then for their kids. This go on for 10 20 yrs. Few understand and few think that their wife is there enemy. They will not give anything to the wife for years but will expect her to do everything for his family. Her married life is sacrificed in between. Harsh truth of many.
You have the unique ability to make your deepest insight points with a sledgehammer yet making me split in laughter right through your discourse. Captain Shankar retd
Namskar sir
Really heart touching practical behaviour of parents.
Their ambitions never end,the son who achieved better'position with hard work has to support till he alive,the nalayak other sons expects financial support.
The reality in the society, explained well.The points are to be discussed and forwarded to families
Thanks sir
False dowry case daal kar chati ka dhoodh yaad dila sakti hai
Happiness
@@nationlove7738 phir toh ho liya.
Isss sentence ka aage koi court case nahi rukega
One point u missed here, sometimes parents dominate marriage decision of their good son completely in order to satisfy their ego in society. leading to tremendous sadness to son and calling it sons fate if son is unhappy after marriage
Absolutely true
True.
Well said hats off
I am a victim of this.
True..
I am female, working as Director in Govt. department. My in-laws and their other relatives never recognized me as an officer. Because they allwere group C . My father in law introduce me as 'she is assistant director' Why our society never admire strong woman as bahu. Now I am 54 . But still I get annoyed with their peculier attitude. All other female members of the family are housewives and although I am better in household duties and take male responsibilities , they admire mediocre bahus. What is this phenomena?? I wonder.
They are useless jealous people. Stay away from them and keep interactions to minimum. Many middle class people will not give any credit to working bahu but enjoy her income
@@chandranem why do they admire secretly? Why can’t they say openly , why so much ego
Same
U must b arrogant
Its jealousy ma'am ...........for happiness......ignore them.........don't give this thoughts place in memory.........ultimately life never promised it gone be fair...........
I can relate this to my father's life. He dedicated large chunk of his life for taking care of parents and siblings, and later was thrown out by same peoole.
Poochna papaji se...a gaya swad
Nikamme siblings ka life set karrna and sort out karrna is also the responsibility of the successful one. This is also one of the items :)
Yes you are absolutely right sir. And they never settle...
@@salimpasha1212 and makes life of the spouse/kids of successful one hell
@@salimpasha1212 well Said facing same issue
Aisa hi ho rha h mere sath b
Ohh..i thought ..m the only one have nikkama sibling
I strongly recommend to never reveal your entire salary to anyone, not even your spouse. If at all you wish to be honest, tell your monthly salary after tax deduction and EPF+VPF deduction and other tax savings methods you may use such as PPF or home/education loan. So if you get 1 lakh/month on paper, tell your salary as maybe 70,000 or 75,000 per month (after tax and tax saving deductions).
Always underplay your salary. This becomes even more crucial when your parents have a habit of revealing your life to their relatives and friends.
ur last line is so true
Hmmm.. baat to hai
It's very tough to hide income from wife as in digital age u get msg of every transaction but one thing you can do it invest your money in property gold sip stocks anywhere after keeping a lumsum money of at least 5 to 10 lakhs in bank for emergency, and always keep crying before your wife that you don't have money left after investment .
Very True...you said brother
Me and my husband have done the same...we never disclose our salary
Yes I am a 35 year old female
I am a chartered accountant I started working for good salary from the age of 25
My mom postponed my marriage till I was 32 with greed to swindle my income along with my younger brother
While her son got married at 28 while he is 20% salary compared to me
It is absolutely true
God bless you. Sad to hear
Are to aap love marriage kar lena tha. Par arrange marriage me to aapka shoshan hi hota. Job k sath bohot aur torture bhi bardaasht karna padta maa to phir bhi achhi hoti hai aap kanhi ja k dekho working women ki halat bhi bohot kharab hoti hai sasuraal mai torture zyada hota hai sasural ma compared to mauka. Kuch 10 %ko achhe family mile hai baaki ro rahe hai sab
I can relate to this sir. But the problem is its too late now. I was on a same guilt trip and wanted to become provider for my family whatever I could. Now I am 38 and yet single. My parents didn't approve my relationship with my GF. Now everyone is settled in their lives, and I am alone and depressed, cursing my life everyday.
And the fun part is my younger siblings don't care much and don't contribute much yet they are more close to my parents than me, because I could not deliver up to the expectations.
Expectations are endless. Stay away from them and start your life now. It is not too late. The more you are near them the more you will be living in guilt.
I find it weird when guys ask permission for a relationship.
Bhai jb aap khud khush rahoge tabhi dusro ko kudh kr paoge , start your journey if it's giving you joyful & happy life . wish you a very happy life ❤️ & god gave you strength to overcome your problems
Bhai m on same line now 35, single and not even considered important anymore
What happened to your girlfriend
There is not even a single person on internet who can talk on topics like this. Tremendous work sir... Ek ek baat sachhi hai in your every video. Please write a book sir on these kinds of teachings.
Yup.... I'm hearing first time anything like this.
You guys should step out of the internet and see the real world
You're living in a box
@@debaprasad9379 stop watching one kind of content, try everything even if you don't know what it is. I'm not saying to force yourself to watch something else but have a mindset of trying something new everyday.
@@ShubhamGupta-kk2fv real world dekhna matlab kya?
This is my father ... my mother was also working ... Both did their best to uplift their respective families ... But it ruined our life ... My sister n me r extremely bitter with both sides of families n don't want to get married ever ... Relatives r the biggest burden
Same here, my parents did well for me not for my cousins. If his parents are unable yo provide them the life I am getting I am the privileged one not him. And then once I deny being ATM I am the bad one. Then let me be bad one now.
high salary hogi to aadmi ki atma choosegi............sir you made me cry here.
That's reality
Is comment section m ek v ladki Nhi dekhige yhi problem h Jb EQUALITY ki bat ati h SALA EK LADKI KO UKRAINE NA CHODNE KA PAVANDI NHI LAGA HALA KI LADKE KM H LADKIO S ....
BEST H SHADI MY KRO.....
Iska mtlb kya he??
Matalab bhai aesa bhi hota Hain...kya😢
Kuch aur bhi choosegi😂
Not just good boys, even good girls nowadays fall into this trap. 😕. This is the story of my life.
I too agree, one of the two daughters , have been living under guilt for so many years to help them but it has been very painful
We all should understand parents r selfish. They don't care about future of their children. My sister is also falling in their trap n destroying her life.
My selfish cunning mom want me to work like serveht for her fav daughter she is brate now nothing no talent only fair and beautiful that everyone like. But i m dusky less beautiful but attractive highr iq level love studying highly ambitious and multi-talented. But got no support from faimly. She want me to be house wife stop being ambitious individuals and book warm . all those quality she want put in my young sister .i m happy and free from future responsibility i will never come home once i m succeed in life
@@shwetathakur4707 how can parents be so discriminating that too against their own child this is soooo sad and disheartening 😢
@@shwetathakur4707 please try to stay away and keep some distance with her and don't leave your goal otherwise you'll lost yourself in her hands.. I'm also seeing these types of situations..
I found it very much relatable with that of my father's life. He was the good boy of the family and our uncles are earning way less salary and respect than him. But he never got close with our grandmother but our uncles did and ultimately because of the tension in family he suffered from serious illness which ultimately took his life. You were on point sir.
God Bless his soul..May you be blessed with hapiness..health & prosperity
😢😢. Bhai rula diya tumne.
Mujhe lagta h mere father ki bhi same story h. But he is fit and fine❤
This has happened with my father....he has ruined our life in the process
This video should be circulated to all Indian families. It's so important that lot of youngsters gets into the trap of Seva. The life becomes so miserable that so many losses the conference and dumped by their own family.
Yup, but after sharing with anyone, most people with narrow minded will make comments to me like I'm being brainwashed with this or I'm getting away from Indian tradition and been influenced by western one. It's too complex bro
@@ygp47 I don't understand after getting married what's the role of parents. They should be only be in advisory role. After having 2 children and 17 years of marriage my mother still made me emotionally black mail to leave everything and take care of her. I emotional fool did it and now regretting. The damage has happened and no way I can fixed it.
Bhai leave your toxic mother as soon as possible ....I did the same and now things are better for me ...
True .
I hv seen in practicality
@@rahuljagdale9113same
I have suffered s lot
My husband had been used as ATM
My in laws made my life Hell
Yes your content is very nice
Thanks Sir
@royshelly7982
Are you not husband as ATM?
Actual reality girls simply select boy based on salary, property, height, professional status.
👏👏👏👏 Nobody talks about these topics the way you do! I went through this scenario for around 20 years, got depressed, had many sessions for 10 months or so with a psychologist to learn to say “STOP I CANT DO MORE, I HAVE A PERSONAL AND FAMILY LIFE ALSO “ things got improved gradually…
I am also suffering from same issue since last 5 year. Can you advice me?
My arranged marriage was the same. I belong to Rich family but got married to the below poverty line family bcoz my husband is Good, Simple and earning well. After marriage they forced me to leave my job as there was no need for such. And once I left the job, I found he was in debt 5 times of his salary. He cannot say No to his parents kyunki bahut takleef dekhi h un logo ne.
I faced so many problems till I got another job. Still problems are there but at least I have some savings for my survival 😊
😢😢. If my husband in laws tell me to leave my job because only he is eaening wel, the first thing that I am going to leave is him😢
Son taking takleef because parents took takleef. In the end, good education did not rid them of takleef. Hope you have informed in laws about debt.
mam shayad aapko BPL matalb nhi pata , i think u want to say your husband is lower middle class
@saumyasrivastava
If you are belonging to rich family it doesn't mean your father property belongs to you. Go check 100 houses ask hey girl did your parents give property to you. Answer is no.
Then what is the point saying you are belonging to rich family.
In reality men getting injustice
Hindi me likh deti.
I am from IIT and in the industry for 7 years. I can vouch that it's all true. Thanks to my father, he maintained a register. I used to hate him for that in the beginning but later that turned out to be a saviour from lot of disputes.
@@maverick7323 true true. I know lot of people who earn a ton and have done simple graduation.
@@maverick7323 *some non-iitians are earning more than some iitians
@@shrishri8898 bhai iit ka bhokaal bus indian companies tak limited hai....get your fact updated
@@shrishri8898 bhai life ka koi hard and fast rule nahi hota aaj kal degree ki value nahi hai skills ki job hai.Mere sath ke pade hue bilkul low grade college se aaj 20 lakh ke package par hai
@@shrishri8898 nhi bhai bas branch C.S lelo
The video is amazing sir.. and great life lessons.. my life is also a very similar ...I am 45 and divorced now.. and my parents are no more..my advise to younger people , please take care of your life as a first priority.. don't be too good and try to make every one happy.. people will use you as a colour pencil to make their life colourful.. you must find a good paying career , a loving wife, have children , house and have connection with God.. you will find people who emotionally make you feel guilty , be very careful.. people you trust and love most will betray you..
@upworkprofileevideonoorula
No loving wife in reality, girls simply select boy based on salary, property, height, professional status. Girls treat man ATM machine
Feeling lucky to be born in a good family. My father act harsh on me only to make me work more hard and become successful. He has already enough savings to live like king along with his govt. pension therefore he has no greed for money. Only thing he wants to see is me standing on my own feet.
One thing i understood from this session is that never reveal your income , not even to your parents, if you're earning 30lakh pa tell them it's 20 and save the surplus.... As he said it all comes down to money, maintain a register for expenses of all sorts because only you are responsible for your future and happiness and no one else ....
especially not reveal to spouse, especially woman should take care of their finances, giving everything to husband landed my friend empty handed and divorced recently
@@bhadwamuhammad979 i love ur name lol 😜👌👍
I 100% agree on this. I've faced this in my life.
@@diauser3327 this is considered financial infidelity. The court can screw you real hard during the divorce.
@@aditya-ml6kmcan you name one thing the court will take side of male in case of marriage
100% accurate.. I was that boy ( I don't know how much good) .. But I had done a lot of return after I started doing bit better in jobs.. I kept handling full families expenses.. However.. I had my eyes opened already due to God given wisdom, high justice loving nature and my wife's advice, I turned back at right time. Did investment on myself and my immediate family..Your advice is reassurance that I am on right track.
You are doing very great service by giving advice in art of managing family and setting all expectations correctly. What a wonderful niche you selected.. Thank you so much for being like Guru.
I am 22 hailing from a small town in Bihar currently pursuing mbbs and brought up in lower middle class family..i hope I get the courage to send this video to my mother..your videos are such an eye opener
Atleast mbbs kar raha hai bhai tu
Bhai, agar tereko lag raha hai ki Dr ban kar tu aish karega, bhul ja
@@mrppsr4731 MBBS is long enough to realise that
Never do this. This man is misleading youths. He will not tell the same to his own son and daughter
@@triptydatta7540 can you please give some points bhai?
Seedhi baat..no bakwas!!
Hats off to you Sir
Bakvas hai
Amir bante hi sab se pahle gharwale hi dushman Ban jate hain...
Just amazing... I'm an IIT grad, happened with me in my initial years of my career. After 4-5 years I set up strict boundaries with my parents
This is why I isolated myself from everyone (family, friends, etc.) once I became rich and started maintaining a low profile and pretend like I am just making enough money to make ends meet. No parents, no siblings, no relatives, no friends, no wife, no partners, no children. I am enjoying everything myself as I earned it all by myself! ;)
🤣🤣 sahi h yar!! Badhiya kiya..😃
@@tamannasingh5641 hii
Ah ...I wish I had such a beautiful life .
Shabash.....😂
I'm planning the same, don't want kids and wife, I'll just enjoy my life, travel, meet new people, try their culture, instead of being miserable with a boring sad life, investing all my money on kids.
Same thing happened with my father who had started to earn at the age of 16 and made a house for the family . My other uncle's though haven't done much but they are taking equal shares in property and after doing so much he hasn't got anything other than criticism from all.
Bhai same mere dad ke saath hua hai my dad started and established gold silver jewellery business and he is gave many gold silver to my uncle and also gave to two elder brother of him and all three had never returned anything to my dad even uncle toh ghr ka kharcha bhi nhi uthate my dad had paid their kid's school fee upto 12th also and the properties my dad bought also my uncle's are demanding.. I'm seeing my dad's sacrifice for family and my both uncle are just enjoying life with my dad's Money
@@abhaysoni926 abhay same to same jaisa hai VAISE mere saath bhi ho raha hai 😢
@abhay @krish maf karna ek galti ho gyi thi. Vese can you elaborate, I can also give insta if you feel uncomfortable
Also, forgive for offense u both.
@millionaire bro then did you or your father tok cunsoltation or not? Exp and good Cunsoltants can change ur father life, do u know(sorry for that kind of english)
Same thing for studious, obedient, working ladies. Arranged marriage is only option.
True insights 👌.
Some parents are pressurising their good boys even after more than 10 or 15 years of marriage of their sibling for monetary helping them. And they themselves are fully supporting their nikkama child by all power and will. What about the life of good boy?
The son should know to deal with it
Same happening with my husband.. 😑
Shame on you bro. Wo tera bhai ya teri behen hai. Tere jaise bewkoof ko samjhane ka man nhi tha lekin samjhana pada.
Very True Sir.Sometimes I feel nikamma hona hi sabse acha hai.No Tension No responsibilities No expectations
True
Your wisdom is earthy and definitely one of the best I have heard. Much, much better than the so-called, self-proclaimed influencers.
U always speack very practical truth which noboday dared to speak.
@speak
Shukriya sir ladko ki problem samajhne ke liye
Sangwanji should be a guest lecturer at various universities all over the country to impart these precious life lessons to students so that they can make this country and society a better place to live in
Uncle how can you be so right and to the point in all topics. I have seen my friend suffering as his wife who is also doctor and has no father, she is doing everything for her mother and siblings at the stake for her marriage. My friend doesn't ask her income but to start family as he is already 38 but she doesn't want to think of kids till she settles down her siblings and her family is emotionally controlling her.
Another patient of mine is working 15 hours after domestic violence in marriage and divorce. But even after working so hard for mother and brother they dont care.
So many times parents put emotions trap and the obedient kid suffers. Hopefully parents understand that kids are not their lottery.
Biggest irony is that in coperate 50 lpa package is 1 to 1.5 lakh in hand not 30 lakhs mnc package are calculated in so much vague that 4 year stocks are calculated in single year CTC and package is inflated
one year salary with stock is nearly 20 lakh
@@imsayan2802Bhai bangalore me 20 lakh ka bhi lawre lag geya hya 🙂🙂
Halat dekh le Bhai😑
@@Sagarpramanik670 I don't get your point.
Guruji aapne mera dil halka kardiya...pura hal to nahi dhoond paya magar jyada sukoon aur gyan mila di hain...pranaam 👏
Eye opening ! this kind of mirrors many living examples - simply great Sir
Your seedhi baat videos are fun to listen. With great messages. Thank you so much! 🙏👍 🎄
सही कहा . जो अच्छा होगा उसका सब use करेँगे माँ बाप भाई बहन .
Loved the topic sir ! Thouy i am not from a service class community, but can totally understand the complexity of this situation. As you always say - your topics are really interesting & true to life . They are preparing me for my future. Thank you so much.
True 👍 आपने बिल्कुल भी extreem नहीं बताया है, ऐसा लगा कि मेरे husband की ही story है, और बिल्कुल उन्होंने जॉब लगने के 10 साल तक शादी नहीं की,but शादी के बाद मेरे साथ हुए behaviour से एहसास हुआ कि घर वाले शादी नहीं करना चाहते थे, और हमारी शादी को 14 साल हो गए हैं husbsnd को आज भी एहसास नहीं है, उनके भाई बहनों की लाइन ही इतनी लंबी है कि खत्म ही नहीं होती
Same story😢😢
Sir In your 3 rd Happiness course I during query time asked u one question. It is very similar to my situation. I am very relieved from this guilt trip now. I face emotional blackmail of my parents with logic and my comments are more articulate. I will watch it atleast 10 times more.
Your effort is very visionary.. its benefits can be seen in long term when sukoon and stability comes in life. Relations remain entact by following ur advice. Your video why beta bahu should not live with in laws was legendary in my opinion. I am thankful I found u before I turn age 30. My pressure of doing good in sarkari naukari is also relieved. Ckakki peasing aaraam sai aur aanch ko kam kar do has given ultimate sukoon to me.
Your advice is doing more good in society than all other reforms, as you are addressing issues which no one is discussing but where actually the root cause of problems lie. Regards
I hope..one my husband will watch all his videos n read ur comment also😊
@@SHIVANEEZWORLDwahh yee choriyaan bahut tez h
@@PankajKumar-eu7oy 🤪🤪
My bad
It's Once my husband 😝
Hi sir ..u logics are life changing material. Pls make a vedio where mother in law has done a job through out her whole life but now bahu she wants job less just to take care of child , her family n relatives. This is my real life issue ..now m having two kids but doing nothing. If I want to raise my life again on track then she again n again interferes my decision n tells my husband very humbly that my husband always belive his mother not me. Wahi ghisa pita excuse ki bache kon dekhega ..n she's very smart enough to cover her evil feelings for me.
If you desire to do job, work on getting it otherwise your life will be hell in regret and frustration
,Even can give you mental issues in future
My sister had same situation but she resisted second child,and now his son is 10 and she has joined the job,it helps her socialise,and be happy otherwise life as housewife can be frustratingly boring for many
@@sudhirchandra9790shakuni karwa de divorce Iska 😁
Exactly the story of my life … high earning of my husband is actually a curse … his parents are just after his money … hamare beech kabhi understanding unhone banne nahi di …. Most times I feel better hota ek normal earning wale se shaadi hoti … dono husband wife mil ke kamate aur achi life jeete
Kisi or ladke se pyar search krna dekho
Mam high earning means like 1lakhs + or more than , that as I earn 1 L I don't know that is it high or medium
@@Jaihindurashtra1igh earning has no limit. Jitna high utna hi kaam lagta hain. But for benchmark like I think, you can be having 1year or more emergency fund, not worrying about electricity bill and stuffs, can alot 5%-10% of your income to buy things for fun or out of need without worrying about savings, 20-40k phone looks very normal budget to you. And many more.
@@Jaihindurashtra12 lac + minimum.
@@Jaihindurashtra1salaried people consider middle class except group 1 officer.
Very well explained. Mainly the closing remarks. Really appreciate you sharing your views with all of us. Respect from my heart. 🙏 I get to learn many practical things from you.
Excellent analysis of this very common problem in our society. Sometimes parents and other family members put so many demands on the person doing well that one almost begins to wish that one were less successful 😀😀
Ye bimari hindu middle class me jyada h
Correct. The family members like brothers and their wife want to have equality in the money of the person who is achieving more. Very popular saying in family " gharwalo ke liye kamana h. Gharwalo ke liye karna h. Gharwalo me aram talb bhai , nikama bhai , bahut saukin bhai aur uski bibi aur bache bhi shamil hote h" ye bhi bola jata h ek ko hoga dusre ko nhi hoga. Kisne kaha h mat karo. Tum bhi karo apne dum per karo dusro per kyu bojh dal rahe ho
@@milisingh3155 shi kha.Aur agar kisi Ghar me saare nikamme niklte hn to ghar ka batwara ho jata h
@@milisingh3155 aur agar kisi Ghar me saare nikamme rh jaate hn to us ghar ka batwara krne ko bolte hai aur kayar ma baap hone b dete hn.
@@chandrabhushan8597 vai dekh sidhi bat sidha sadha ladka h apni ma bap k lie v ji skta h sidhi bat shadi krne ki zarurat nhi hai......
Sare ladko ko shadi krne k chakkar m wat lag jati h....
Dekho do chiz na Koi ideology shi h na hi Satya h shadi Mt kro agar ache ladke ho to agar utne bole vale nhi ho to kro
Yes we love listening to your practical advice 🙏
Actually. And the demands doesn't end when a sibling especially daughter gets married. When this daughter comes to Mayka for 15-20 days, the food, fun, travel, gifts for all the her family etc. expenses are more than monthly expenditure.. 😢 The good son and the obedient Bahu has to make extra budget for that..
These parents want to go on trips, relatives in foreign countries invite them out of respect. Now they want their son to do all the expenses... Because they are dependent..
The good boy son doesn't take foreign trips himself as he wants to save for his own old age.. 🤦🏼♀️😂
Bahut badhiya topic hai, sir ......
Bahut badhiya clarity session sir, thank you!
Sir, you told my life's story. Really, eye opening. Thank you.
Learnings from this lesson: Good boy should be Strict, Logical and Fare.
As a first time would be mom, I always think, what is the the right way. Kaha galti hui hai? Kisse hui hai aur mai kaise us galti ko apne bacche ke saath hone se rok sakti hun. How can we break this cycle? Maine ye video dekhn start hi is intention se kiya ki I will learn how to not let being good a curse on my son (if I have a son). Very helpful.
I absolutely agree. Bacche hume kucch owe nahi karte. Mai Aaj keh rahi hun. Aaj se 30 saal baad bhi kahungi. We bring them into this world, we spend on their studies or give them the best we can for our own selfish reasons. That selfish reason can be love for our blood or our own desire to look good parents in the eyes of the society.
Koi bhi insaan kahi door kisi anjaan ke naam pe paisa bhej de, use padha likha de, aur fir ummid kare ki maine kiya toh mujhe milna chahiye, toh shayad fair hai. Aur tab nahi mil raha toh aapne invest karne se pehle offer documents thik se padhe nahi. Bacchon ko apne budhaape ki laathi banana chhorna parega. Nahi toh woh bas kaath ke hi ho ke reh jaayenge. Ye chaahte ho apne jigar ke tukde se toh fir karo. Lage raho.
Ma ke naam ki property ladki nhi le sakti, aur ladki apne naam ki hui property se nikal sakti hai sabko, so be careful. Not a sensible decision to take peoperty on girls name, buying property on girls name is not the gensture to show love
I have experienced the same. But whenever I have tried to convey/explain the same as a son, I was always be seen as mean by others including the parents. Thanks for sharing the video.
My husband is going through this I feel bad try not to fight but when I see injustice towards us from family I try to stop him 😢I love him and want him to be proud always .
Sir you helped a lot. You're consultation gives the most realistic image of Indian families and there Psychic.
This is the truth,
Thank u so much sir, ye sab baat karne ke liye, it is a thought provoking video
This has blown my mind. Every sentence makes sence and is so practical. Yup in today's world, there are most of videos of about how to get successful.... How get to that last ladder of success but when people reach their, they have all knowledge about Professional stuff but never thought of what will happen to his social life when he gets along with it.
You are great sir..
I salute your experience and understanding
Sir....very naked truth...Pranam 🙏
I recently started watching your CZcams videos, they are practical, and the examples you give are real and practical. Keep doing the good work.
sir your videos are very insightful, you are only guru in my life so far,
dint have anyone to give me advice or life lessons ever in life, you are the first person to provide these lessons, thanks to what you are doing,
request to make a video guiding single persons in their life forward, we have no direction, no family for whom we need to earn, especially single woman have no security/support etc and life seems hell at times, but we want to find that one thing that keeeps going and gives motivation
nice video sir.... promoting more transparency in relations, and most importantly speak up everyone, keep your hearts out
Great sir,. !!! I hope your videos on these particular topics reaches each and every person in India....
Awesome video.
I wish this eye opener video released like 10 years ago. For all young lower middle class good boys/girls, which are moving to higher middle class, this is a treasure.
Thank You sir!! always opening eyes.Mazaa aa gyaa!
You hit the nail ! It is absolutely true !
waah point to point...zabardast....this is much needed...thank you sir very much
So relatable to my husband. My in laws did all things as you said. Dudh ka karz and all things set in my husband's mind. Even after doing so many things, these parents demanding to return son's degree. They threw us out of family. Never be too good to anyone.
💯 as always 🙏🏻Thank you for sharing such eye opening information. I wish I had seen your videos 20 years back 😅
Yes this must be happening in NCR or any other part of India but my parents never ask for any financial or physical help till now to improve their living standards. Their age is more then 70 years and upto now they have very high moral & self respect. They are from Chamoli Uttarakhand 🙏 hope you understand my feelings. Otherwise video is very authentic and pathfinder but there must be some different aspects of any situation
In cities things are no good
namaste Sir....so connecting....U told complete truth. Got clarity! thanks
So glad I found this channel 🙏🏼
Can relate to everything said here.
You create so beautiful videos. You speak the truth & explain the realities of the Indian society
Sir you are the only one hope to the emotional health of youth. Indian youth is actually reparenting themselves in adulthood because of the traumatized childhood we had. Everything is not fault of our parents because they are product of their upbringing but it is actually good that today's youth is trying not to take that trauma to next generation by reparenting themselves.
Tbh my parents are very good. But I see such examples everywhere..in fact my own father is the example of this phenomenon. He was the topper, always successful one earning for us but my grandparents are closer to the sons who are living with them.
Sirji excellent analysis and insightful speeches
बहुत बढ़िया सर । One of the best advice recvd today । thank you ❤❤
Well, this was extremely good explanation of a subtle but massive problem. Epic !
Hi sir, i follow ur insightful releases on and off. Ur viewpoints are relevant, realistic, and ofcourse the harsh truths! Thanks so much. Saving them all for my kid. I have gotten acces to them in my 30s, not too late, but young adults will definitely benefit more
Thanks a lot for enlightenment. This message is very necessary in today's world
Great message, please continue the awesome work your doing sir
how do you touch the reality so closely. awesome sir, i am speechless.
What a great prospective. Truth which is hard to speak. Thank you sir
Thank you so much Amit Ji for speaking the ultimate truth 🙏💐🙏
Thank you sir and Merry Christmas! 🎄
What a wonderful guidance. This should be shown to all these good boys and their parents
Mushkil ye hai ki aise ache ladke apne ap ke khud hi dushman hote hai inko biwi samjhati hai ki apne paise sambhal ke do kisi ko to biwi hi inko dushman lagti hai villain lagti hai ki mere gharwalo ke liye aise bol rahi hai ,aur inke ma baap bhai behan in par hi sari responsibility dal dete hai ,inke apne bacho ke liye kuch bachta nahi ,jab kharab time ata hai inka tab koi inko nikal ke deta nahi
Yeh bilkul meri kahani hain. Thank you, Amit Ji
Thanks for making this I am relating to it at some level.thanks for giving clearity
Sir u r gr8 gr8 gr8. What a explanation sir !!! I am sharing this video with my son he is just 16 years . Its worth to educate him early.
Each and every word is true Sir. Indian parents make the good boys do everything for them monthly expenses,gifts,marriages, new home etc their siblings and then for their kids. This go on for 10 20 yrs. Few understand and few think that their wife is there enemy. They will not give anything to the wife for years but will expect her to do everything for his family. Her married life is sacrificed in between. Harsh truth of many.
Thankyou so much Sir, aapke videos se bohot clarity milti hai and bohot kuch seekhne ko milta hai. 🙏🙏
Much needed thoughts for today's world. Even parents should think about these perspectives. Thanks for sharing!
You have the unique ability to make your deepest insight points with a sledgehammer yet making me split in laughter right through your discourse. Captain Shankar retd
This is so true. I have faced this in my family. Your own family will drain out your money and your energy. Be strict with your money.
Very well said sir....this is the hard reality. I m in corporate. Perfect example of what you said.
🙏 Thanks for this very useful insights sir.