Sir My grandfather made a brilliant decision in 1980s by not making his kids live together. My fathers and his brothers family lives in same building in different apartments. I have grown up seeing such good balance between large family and private life. My mother & all aunties had privacy and were very happy. All equally shared the aging parents responsibility This model of staying next to each other is very successful in my family 👏🏻 My daada daadi were very happy lived till 90 and passed away peacefully 🙏🏻
@@monoj3299 he is a property broker, he wants family should be separate. So that everyone will by new house or will stay in rent then Realstate will give more return.
I got tears in my eyes. My father is bhayankar sharavan Kumar and violated my mamma's life for 30 years by imposing all seva on her shoulders in joint family. She went for two surgery but still she is cooking for whole family. And the worst effect is on me as individual because I have seen this all my life. One thing I want to tell all the unmarried boys that if you are real Shravan Kumar never get married. Otherwise you simply destroy your spouse life as well as your kids future and their entire life by giving them soul wounds.
My dad insisted on me being financially independent before I got married. I mistakenly married a Shravan Kumar and my life has been hell since. I earn well and I didnt even ask for clothes or jewellery from him ever (in retrospect i should have) but my husband wanted a wife that earned well and still cooked and did seva for his family. I am on the verge of divorce. I should have travelled the world, invested more money in SIP and stocks and should have lived my life. All the money I earned was taken by my husband and his wealth multiplied while my bank account dried up. Moral: If you think being financially independent will promise you a good husband or a better marriage. Think again.
"Agar shravan Kumar banna hai toh apne dum pe bano biwi k dum pe nahi..... " what a line Sir.. If anyone wants to become shravan Kumar please do your parents' seva on your own not by the help of spouse.
I hope I'm not offending anyone. I recently met an alliance with whom I was having discussion. I asked him that we live seperately in a nearby apartment to his parents so that we can help them when they need us. But he was like "no my mother cooks even if I wake her up in the middle of the night, she loves so much that she comes to my room when I am working from home and hugs saying "Mera baccha". 😐 I am a only daughter to my parents and they have always taught me to be independent because they say "You don't have any sibling. After us nobody will be there to help you, so learn to be as independent as possible". My dad taught me car driving, investment and what not. Even my mother has taught me many things including cooking. So I can safely say I can survive/live alone. So I just asked him one question to that he didn't have answer. When a girl's parents can send their daughter and live by themselves why can't boy's parents do the same since both are of almost same age? I just wanted to share my experience and two cents. It's indeed a sensitive topic and you have talked about it very well, Sir. Thank you .
🤔 kya h na, ladki is supposed to be Shaktiman, usse sab kuch aana chahiye......par ladka toh bechara bachcha hai, kaise kuch karega....irony of society.....
These type of moms are real fire... Even after 10 years of my marriage my mother in law who complains all day about her sugar and bp and arthritis will get up at midnight prepare parathas and my husband will demoralize me
100% sahi hai Husband k parents ki over expectations se ladkiyan khud ki life enjoy karna to door jee bhi nahi pati hain. Aur ye expectations badhti jaati hai,puri na hone par taane maarne ko baithe rehte hain,saas sasur,chahe bahu ki physical limitations ho, lekin SEVA milni chahiye.Aur phir WhatsApp groups par bechaare ma baap wale message forward karte rehte hain. Meri marriage ko 24 years ho gaye hain aur ye seva ka formula pehle saal se hi chala aa raha hai.Kya moral duties sirf bahu ki hoti hai,saas sasur bimar bahu ka muh se haal puchhne me bhi asamarth hote hain??!! Wahi saas sasur apni beti ko din me chaar baar call karke puchhenge lekin unki sewa kar rahi bahu k liye unke koi emotions nahi hai. I feel like I am only a working machine for them.
Aur irony to ye hai nanad aakr bolti he k tum meri ma ko nhi phone krti, are us buddhu ko ye kaun bataye k ma baap me itni pat rhi to bahu kya kare.. Chaubison ghante phone calls dono k fir bhi khush ni.. Koi to chahiye na blame lgane ko.. So thts bahu
Aise type ke Shravan kumar se bahut divorce ho chuke hai ... I had a similar experience too.. I am glad someone actually hit this topic and sooo logically well... thank you Sir
Wonderfully explained how society is making sons guilty . Yes as someone said in the comments, every family should have one like you. Nowadays all lazy and irresponsible Inlaws are taking the advantage of this sravankhmar story. Yes it’s true that mother-in-law is the main culprit to make sons feel guilt in order to make more overpower on his family.
Aap ko sunkar Aisa lagta hai, jaise koi mere dimag ko padh paya hai. I have a son who just turned 18 and I've been teaching him all these things: To live separate with his wife and be more connected with family I tell him that last 4-5 yrs of our lives, we may need some assistance but we'll not get old n sewa chahne Wale just next day of his marriage. Everybody should take care of their health, why to depend on anybody specially your daughter in law Or even your son? India me ek shauk hai sabko, apni bimari discuss karke relatives ki sympathy lene ka n sewa karane ka. Kya dusre deshon me log budhe nahi hote, log 80-90 + hokar bhi active hote hain, roj raat ko apne paon nahin dabwate 😁 Jab hum apne budhape ki lathi par khud hi latak jayenge to wo hume Sahara kaise degi, it's merely a support for us but can't become our feet.
"It's hard to be a man today, It's hard to be a woman today. " A beautiful statement. Best part is both are equally stated not stressing on either of them separately..
Agar me aapki ye video apne family group me dal do to saas sasur ke sath sath nand devar sab naraz ho jayenge. Ye alag bat h nand aur devar khud bhi apne level per yehi chahte h. Bina bole sab karo bus bolo mat. Aap great h sir jo bolne ki himat rakhte h
Bravo Mr. Sangwan! This was a brilliant discussion. It’s the truth everyone needs to hear. Your mention about the female infanticide brought tears to my eyes.
Hello sir, please make a video on marriage councelling. The girls(esp working ones) are living in 21st century however the boy and his family is still in 18th century. Its hard to carry on a marriage.
Yes plz...workng girls And they want a qualified maid Hum hai azaad vichaar k log Ladki ki naukri se hume atraj nahi Par beta rasoi me kadam rakhe Ye hume bardasht nahi Also on nando ki interference...which acts as last thud on the whole drama Plz waitng for these 2 topics
We are 3 siblings when our younger sister was born relatives are crying and telling my mom why you have not check the gender and aborted. My parents are ok with girl or boy 🤗 it's been 20 years and I'm working in a MNC company as a software engineer, my sister is an advocate and younger one is studying and same relative are coming and telling ladka ladki me koi bhedbhav nahi h 😅
Absolutely correct. Why different thought process for parents of a son and a daughter?? If it's a son, he and his wife are bound to take care of his parents...and if it's daughter, there's no expectation from her because she has to take care of her in laws first . Who will take care of her parents if they don't have a son?? And son in law has no responsibility towards his parents in law?? Such a hypocrite society. Truth is both the son and daughter are equally important for their parents and parents are for them. You should not get an additional degree for giving birth to a son. I can't agree more...Shravan Kumar banna hai to apne dam pe bano, biwi ke sahare nahi.
@@good123g All these problems are because of Patriarchy. If women stayed at their homes after marriage and men shifted, there wud hv been much lesser problems of सेवा of oldies.
So true!@ Mothers of a boy feel that they are entitled to something great. Im working,unmarried, staying with my father,lost my mother 5 years back. Whenever I search someone to get married. Their concern specially the guys parents is that who will take care of your father once you get married. So they mean that its ok for me to be working and take care of the boys parents and thats what im entitled to,but not equally for my father if he is not keeping well?? Why???
For the first time somebody dared to tell the truth ki " pehle things were simpler..now they are much more complex"!! Maa baap ne bacchon ko paalna is no Ehsan done to the kid..jo usne bada hokar chukaana chahye!! Azaad Kar do bacchon ko! If you say you gave good upbringing and sacrificed a lot then trust your upbringing and set them free! They will take care of you out of love and not as a duty..don't suffocate them with the load of your life and actions..
सर, आपने भारतीय समाज के बेहद महत्त्वपूर्ण समस्या की चर्चा की है। अधिकांश लोग कुढ़ रहे हैं, लेकिन इस पर कोई बात ही नही करता है। हम फिनलैण्ड के बेहतरीन हैपिनेस इंडेक्स की बात तो करते हैं, लेकिन उनके सामाजिक खासकर पारिवारिक संरचना पर बात नहीं करना चाहते हैं। हमारे अभिभावक अपने जीवन के अंतिम 3 महीनों की सेवा की गारंटी के चक्कर मे बच्चों के सबसे खुशनुमा माने जाने वाले युवा उम्र 30 से 45 वर्षों की खुशियों का बलिदान चाहते हैं। वो रिश्ते तो शोर शराबे के साथ बनाते हैं, लेकिन एडजस्ट करने को तैयार नहीं हैं। इस पर गहन और खुले दिमाग से चर्चा की जरूरत है।
Great video. So true. Parents behave like businessmen by expecting returns from their children . They emotionally traumatize their children. Very nicely and honestly put !!
Comedy aapki zabardast chalegi! Again great issue addressed. What I love about your thought process is the focus on the next generation. If we as a society help the upcoming generations in succeeding without making a big deal out of it, they will automatically be equipped and capable of taking care of the old and the aging.
My husband was a gem of a son who from the age of 21 , he was literally offered service to his parents & after his father who had cancer & passed away,husband was so good to his 4 siblings too, he kept saying it's his privilege 🙏🙏I salute such gems🙏🙏
Sir, you are godsent. I have been struggling to articulate this but have failed. You have said this beautifully. Parents are lucky to have kids. they bring so much joy and meaning to your lives! We should be thankful to our kids and stop expecting them to repay.
Sir, I can't tell what a big smile I have on my face while listening to you. Not that you are speaking what I think, but you are talking about a bigger issues that's engulfing our country. The comment you made about low happiness index/ problems of lower middle class and being stuck in that loop is so true. Hats off to your work and candidness.
I can say lots of things but it wouldn't be enough to say thankyou.. Mukti mil gaye mujhe to... For last 4 years I m facing depression due to these overated dialogues of parents...😌
From past 28 years I am married to one.. I just hate him and his parents but still serving them as being a single child of my parents as all of them think it's MY duty... I hate all of them
Actually mostly maa chahti hi k beta shravan kumar bane aur Bina shadi k apni seva kare lekin problem ye he k vo ye bete ko Bata nahi sakti, nahi to vo swarthy prove ho jayegi esiliye.
I agree 👍 मुझे नहीं लगता कि हमारे पुराणों में भी श्रवण कुमार बनाने के लिए लिखा होगा,because hamari Ramayan में भी श्री राम की मांओं का कहीं जिक्र नहीं है कि श्री राम उनके साथ रहते थे, वो अपने अध्यात्म और मोक्ष के लिए तीर्थ स्थल चली गई थी और महाभारत में कुंती, गांधारी और धृतराष्ट्र जंगलों हिमालय चले गए, तो कहीं नहीं है कि वो last time में अपने बच्चों के पास रहे हो,because last time में उन्हें मोक्ष priority होती थी, ये बात सही है कि श्रवण कुमार इसीलिए था because his parents were blind
I love you for your thought process ❤️ I am mother of two and l feel so much gratitude towards them, l am so grateful to them कि वो मेरी जिंदगी में आए और मुझे मां बनने का सम्मान दिया। मेरे बच्चे ईश्वर का आशीर्वाद है मेरे लिए।
18:30 You forgot the ones who spoil all the ironed and arranged clothes that are kept in the cupboard when they pull out something to wear. Aisa bhi karte hain.
Same thing happened in my home with my mother in law.. She indulged n broke by brother in laws family n looking for another girl... Thanks sir for raising this issue
Sir! Yet another superb video from you! I feel like you have put into words what is going on in my mind so beautifully! Love this channel for its fresh and reformist take on real issues faced by most people. Thanks a lot Amit sir
In society *Standard for expectations* from parents is low compared to expectations from kids. Kids should achieve more from the less resource but when it's kids turn to takecare of parents, quality must be high.
@@problemsolution267because they forget to teach their sons basics of sewa at early-stage. They shower their son with all love n no trainings with expectations that his wife will serve them? Why wud she? She is not under any karza.
Kisliye kare sewa tune Karli kya apne saas ki bc ahsaan kar rhe ho kya paida karke aukat hi kya h tumhari hospital me admit hoza nurse Roz Teri deva karegi or itna hi ghamand h to mat Karo bacche paida
@@ninanani4085and parents forget they are nothing without children apne aap se puch kya aukat h teri society mein Bina bacche ki ya tum rahis ki aulad ho
Bahut bahut sahi, to the point and super awesome, I really appreciate your super wisdom. Plz continue doing such content, really country needs mentor like you.
Agree totally..... Prepare your sons from teenage to be on their own otherwise they grow up with a mentality of staying on and on in their parents house. Move them out as soon as they start earning. Let them manage themselves alone before taking on the responsibility of marriage. Give privacy and freedom to your daughter in law by giving her a separate home.... She will fall in love with her in laws.
We can't change our parents who are now in 70s or 80s. But our generation who in few years will become parents in law must learn from these videos and spread awareness by sharing these.
Highly appreciated by both my wife and myself. Every topic that you speak on is impeccably presented. We couldn't agree more with your views. Very happy to know at least some like minded souls like us co exist in this world. Every thing you say SA and not NSA :-)
Very true sir,,,, bachche sach me pure soul hote hain.. Hum apne swarth me maa bap bante hain aur fir puri life us bachche par ehsaan jatate rehte hain..
U say it like it is sir . Indian family joint system is now decayed . It’s just politics and interference on in laws in sons life . Control issue and interference. It’s couple who should take control of their Marraige and have their own space . Don’t people move cities for jobs ? People go abroad for jobs and passports their parents stay back with cook maids . Indian parents should have some self respect for them selves.
Correct sir I do agree with you, that they should be a bachelor if they want to take care of only their parents my husband also same mentality’s they use to trouble me a lot but still I should shut my mouth & do seva for them from morning to night & always they pick up a quarrel with me & my husband always supported his parents even though he knew deep down in his heart ❤️ that his parents were wrong as he could never draw a line for his parents so they use to treat me like scrap as I was working initially & later started my own company but always they mocked me including husband as well the worst family I have seen in my life
I watched two videos of sir today. One was curse of being good child in family Second was this....... Unfortunately my father is shravan kumar And i am the cursed good child......
So finally someone of our parents generation is talking about this harsh truth... So here's my opinion based on what I read or studied so please sharavan Kumar's can avoid this... So basically in India, everyone is declared as GOD... Parents are first God, babies are God, teachers are God, doctors are God... So if a human being with body of flesh and blood and with limited lower consciousness is God... Do you even know what kind of Sin is this of acknowledging human as God? 1. Specially I don't understand what special powers Indian parents get when they give birth to a baby... Foreigners also give birth of baby through same process and even animals.. so what is so special about Indian parents? If they are God then can they kill their children and give life to them once again? If not then how can be you termed as God? Srimadbhagwatgeeta clearly states that there is only one almight divine or Sachchidanand Parambrahama and every creatures on this planet are a tiny part of him including our parents. 2. Second as you mentioned in this video that bringing up the child and giving them a good life is responsibility and not sacrifice then the Indian parents emotionally blackmailing their children is not at all love... Love is always unconditional and with no expectations. Srimadbhagwatgeeta clearly states that do your duties but without any expectations and attachments so if parents are expecting that they are investigating on their children and in future they will give them back is certainly not love. 3. As you said, if a son wants to be a Shravan Kumar or Sri Ram then first of all introspect yourself that do you even have 0.1% qualities of both of them? And moreover are your parents SATYAVADI, DHARMAPARAYANA and KARTAVYANISHTHA like Sharavan Kumar's parents or Raja Dasharath? If not then how can you becom Shravan Kumar or Sri Ram.. don't abuse them by doing all these sins in name of them. 4? The most important thing, shravan kumar and Sri Ram lived in Tretayuga when Varnashram dharma was followed in society.. Brahmacharya upto 25 yrs, grihastha 26-50 yrs, vanaprastha 51-75 yrs and sanyaas 76-100... So basically when parents used to turn 51, they used to handover all the responsibilities to the couple and left home and go on teertha yatra... Main motto was to leave the materialistic world... So if you want to become shravan kumar in kalyug then your parents must leave home at 51 but no the kalyugi people want all luxuries at that age also so basically making son shravan kumar or Shri Ram is basically a ninja technique to be in the materialistic life... So if you want to follow all the rules of Satyuga, Tretayuga and Dwaparyuga in this kaliyuga period then do follow all the rules and regulations strictly and not using some of them for their own personal benifits...
Bahut badiya hai... Maa baap ko khush rakhna hai chahe phir wife n kids ka kuch bhi ho... Ant main na ghar ka rahta hai na ghat ka... Koi khush nahi rahta
Brilliantly said, Sir... Exactly resonates with my views... Always wondered why nobody thought along the same lines... You're such a progressive thinker and a splendid speaker 👏👏👏
I concur with each and every word of yours. Some parents think that they are no less than God. By providing the basic necessities like food, cloth and education, they show as if they are doing some 'ahsaan' on the kids.
Dear sir, no words for this opinion, so true and right, every person has some duty towards family members but nobody should be considered as devi Or devta.
Love your style of way of speaking truth . We live life to keep happy others and keep ourselves in worries and our children always in pressure ki humne apne ma baap ko to hamesha khush rakhna hai chahe hum khush rhe na rahein. That's the truth you speak reality of our society.
Very important to talk about this particular topic , adds to unnecessary unproductive rather destructive stress on both generations involved and stops growth . Also practical thinking , respecting emotions though , but not getting carried away with emotions can bring up good solutions. But problem with us is either we are too emotional or too practical. Wahin gadbad hota hai phir . But yes big thanks for opening up this discussion much needed true service to humanity to uncover blind spots - not easy.👌👍😇🙏🏼
I am 27 years old n i sometimes try to tell the same things to my parents but they take it in negative sense. Sir, despite u r my parents' age, ur way of teaching style is superb and entertaining like the present times. Hats off to ur modern views and starting ur channel😊
I tell my dad ,please smoke,drink less. Exercise more. He took early retirement,does nothing at home. I am afraid if he will fall sick before his time. All he does is sit,drink tea,3 times meal. He won't move at all.
Since few days I have been watching your videos ........thank you for speaking over critical and sensitive topics....... families should teach these things to new generation which they are not doing.....happy atleast you are here to educate us...........change in thought process will come for that current generation has to implement these points in Life
What you mentioned is absolutely correct sir that mother-in-laws & including husband also thinks that no matter what the daughter in law will never leave the house.... we are not that old fashioned people coz we are not dependent on anyone.... coz we are also working... & all we want is peace in life
Your channel is something society needs the most but doesn't deserve. Thanks a lot, sir.
👍👍
Very true. He's talking truth. Which might sting to some people ..but somebody has to talk
Agree
Indians should see this, India is overflowing all kind of stupid faith, beliefs and culture
Sir
My grandfather made a brilliant decision in 1980s by not making his kids live together.
My fathers and his brothers family lives in same building in different apartments.
I have grown up seeing such good balance between large family and private life. My mother & all aunties had privacy and were very happy.
All equally shared the aging parents responsibility
This model of staying next to each other is very successful in my family 👏🏻
My daada daadi were very happy lived till 90 and passed away peacefully 🙏🏻
Abe kya fly karwa rahe ho? Chidia, maina?
@@ss2616 he is trying to say family*
@@ss2616 mind ur language, u r in public place
This is perfect
@@ss2616 fly is short form of family.
you had me at "agar shravan kumar banna hai to apne dum pe bano...wife ke bharose nhi"....loved this video
Sach kaha
@@arpitaameriya Right , he is anti hindu
@@monoj3299 he is a property broker, he wants family should be separate. So that everyone will by new house or will stay in rent then Realstate will give more return.
@@yamraj7493 Agreed👍
@@monoj3299 Sri Krishna has repeatedly taught us that change is the way of the world. Stop clinging on to old things and adapt with the new age.
I got tears in my eyes. My father is bhayankar sharavan Kumar and violated my mamma's life for 30 years by imposing all seva on her shoulders in joint family. She went for two surgery but still she is cooking for whole family. And the worst effect is on me as individual because I have seen this all my life. One thing I want to tell all the unmarried boys that if you are real Shravan Kumar never get married. Otherwise you simply destroy your spouse life as well as your kids future and their entire life by giving them soul wounds.
Are you married? To a sravan kmr?
Absolutely true
My dad insisted on me being financially independent before I got married. I mistakenly married a Shravan Kumar and my life has been hell since. I earn well and I didnt even ask for clothes or jewellery from him ever (in retrospect i should have) but my husband wanted a wife that earned well and still cooked and did seva for his family. I am on the verge of divorce. I should have travelled the world, invested more money in SIP and stocks and should have lived my life. All the money I earned was taken by my husband and his wealth multiplied while my bank account dried up.
Moral: If you think being financially independent will promise you a good husband or a better marriage. Think again.
@@Aleyah It is better to divorce him and live your life peacefully.
👍
"Agar shravan Kumar banna hai toh apne dum pe bano biwi k dum pe nahi..... " what a line Sir.. If anyone wants to become shravan Kumar please do your parents' seva on your own not by the help of spouse.
I hope I'm not offending anyone. I recently met an alliance with whom I was having discussion. I asked him that we live seperately in a nearby apartment to his parents so that we can help them when they need us. But he was like "no my mother cooks even if I wake her up in the middle of the night, she loves so much that she comes to my room when I am working from home and hugs saying "Mera baccha". 😐
I am a only daughter to my parents and they have always taught me to be independent because they say "You don't have any sibling. After us nobody will be there to help you, so learn to be as independent as possible". My dad taught me car driving, investment and what not. Even my mother has taught me many things including cooking. So I can safely say I can survive/live alone.
So I just asked him one question to that he didn't have answer. When a girl's parents can send their daughter and live by themselves why can't boy's parents do the same since both are of almost same age?
I just wanted to share my experience and two cents.
It's indeed a sensitive topic and you have talked about it very well, Sir. Thank you .
🤔 kya h na, ladki is supposed to be Shaktiman, usse sab kuch aana chahiye......par ladka toh bechara bachcha hai, kaise kuch karega....irony of society.....
Plz say you didnt marry him
Please don’t marry him. 🙏🏻coming from experience
These type of moms are real fire... Even after 10 years of my marriage my mother in law who complains all day about her sugar and bp and arthritis will get up at midnight prepare parathas and my husband will demoralize me
Well Said
This has been my thought too.
Finally someone giving voice to my thoughts.... That's exactly what I feel society needs to understand 👍
Yes, same here.
Same here
100% sahi hai
Husband k parents ki over expectations se ladkiyan khud ki life enjoy karna to door jee bhi nahi pati hain.
Aur ye expectations badhti jaati hai,puri na hone par taane maarne ko baithe rehte hain,saas sasur,chahe bahu ki physical limitations ho, lekin SEVA milni chahiye.Aur phir WhatsApp groups par bechaare ma baap wale message forward karte rehte hain.
Meri marriage ko 24 years ho gaye hain aur ye seva ka formula pehle saal se hi chala aa raha hai.Kya moral duties sirf bahu ki hoti hai,saas sasur bimar bahu ka muh se haal puchhne me bhi asamarth hote hain??!!
Wahi saas sasur apni beti ko din me chaar baar call karke puchhenge lekin unki sewa kar rahi bahu k liye unke koi emotions nahi hai.
I feel like I am only a working machine for them.
Sorry yaar. They have different rules for daughters and dils. Daughters are meant to be precious, dil is meant to be a doormat.
Aur irony to ye hai nanad aakr bolti he k tum meri ma ko nhi phone krti, are us buddhu ko ye kaun bataye k ma baap me itni pat rhi to bahu kya kare.. Chaubison ghante phone calls dono k fir bhi khush ni.. Koi to chahiye na blame lgane ko.. So thts bahu
Yes
Yahan bhi yahin haal hain
Aise type ke Shravan kumar se bahut divorce ho chuke hai ... I had a similar experience too.. I am glad someone actually hit this topic and sooo logically well... thank you Sir
Wonderfully explained how society is making sons guilty . Yes as someone said in the comments, every family should have one like you. Nowadays all lazy and irresponsible Inlaws are taking the advantage of this sravankhmar story. Yes it’s true that mother-in-law is the main culprit to make sons feel guilt in order to make more overpower on his family.
Aap ko sunkar Aisa lagta hai, jaise koi mere dimag ko padh paya hai.
I have a son who just turned 18 and I've been teaching him all these things:
To live separate with his wife and be more connected with family
I tell him that last 4-5 yrs of our lives, we may need some assistance but we'll not get old n sewa chahne Wale just next day of his marriage.
Everybody should take care of their health, why to depend on anybody specially your daughter in law Or even your son?
India me ek shauk hai sabko, apni bimari discuss karke relatives ki sympathy lene ka n sewa karane ka. Kya dusre deshon me log budhe nahi hote, log 80-90 + hokar bhi active hote hain, roj raat ko apne paon nahin dabwate 😁
Jab hum apne budhape ki lathi par khud hi latak jayenge to wo hume Sahara kaise degi, it's merely a support for us but can't become our feet.
Ghar ke kaam sikhaye ya nahi?
"It's hard to be a man today, It's hard to be a woman today. " A beautiful statement. Best part is both are equally stated not stressing on either of them separately..
Agar me aapki ye video apne family group me dal do to saas sasur ke sath sath nand devar sab naraz ho jayenge. Ye alag bat h nand aur devar khud bhi apne level per yehi chahte h. Bina bole sab karo bus bolo mat. Aap great h sir jo bolne ki himat rakhte h
Yes I m married to shravan Kumar,mere husband nind me se uthe to unhe apni mummy ke liye kuch na kuch sochte rehte hain
🤣🤣🤣 lol,. My brother in law is also a shravan kumar... I hate that bastard
@@Crispr_cas9thwhat are you to call him baster if you have little courage say this infront of him rather then spamming this in CZcams 😂
Bravo Mr. Sangwan! This was a brilliant discussion. It’s the truth everyone needs to hear. Your mention about the female infanticide brought tears to my eyes.
Hello sir, please make a video on marriage councelling. The girls(esp working ones) are living in 21st century however the boy and his family is still in 18th century. Its hard to carry on a marriage.
Yes I also want the same video on this topic
I agree
Yes plz...workng girls
And they want a qualified maid
Hum hai azaad vichaar k log
Ladki ki naukri se hume atraj nahi
Par beta rasoi me kadam rakhe
Ye hume bardasht nahi
Also on nando ki interference...which acts as last thud on the whole drama
Plz waitng for these 2 topics
@@pritigoel722 yaar Priti, Tum b humare Kaisi stayi hui lag rhi ho. Connect with me if you want a friend to share.
Not always
We are 3 siblings when our younger sister was born relatives are crying and telling my mom why you have not check the gender and aborted. My parents are ok with girl or boy 🤗 it's been 20 years and I'm working in a MNC company as a software engineer, my sister is an advocate and younger one is studying and same relative are coming and telling ladka ladki me koi bhedbhav nahi h 😅
My parents are same 👍.i am proud of them .
Ya allah!! 3 daughters..
Same relatives saying'' no difference in boy and girl''.......unhe unki purani recording sunane ko dil nahi chahta....
👍👍
@@anjnasharma6547 literally but it's ok unhe society ne yahi sikhaya h. And now they are seeing and learning
Absolutely correct. Why different thought process for parents of a son and a daughter?? If it's a son, he and his wife are bound to take care of his parents...and if it's daughter, there's no expectation from her because she has to take care of her in laws first . Who will take care of her parents if they don't have a son?? And son in law has no responsibility towards his parents in law?? Such a hypocrite society. Truth is both the son and daughter are equally important for their parents and parents are for them. You should not get an additional degree for giving birth to a son. I can't agree more...Shravan Kumar banna hai to apne dam pe bano, biwi ke sahare nahi.
Duties should be divided. Each one takes care of their parents
@@good123g All these problems are because of Patriarchy. If women stayed at their homes after marriage and men shifted, there wud hv been much lesser problems of सेवा of oldies.
So true!@ Mothers of a boy feel that they are entitled to something great. Im working,unmarried, staying with my father,lost my mother 5 years back. Whenever I search someone to get married. Their concern specially the guys parents is that who will take care of your father once you get married. So they mean that its ok for me to be working and take care of the boys parents and thats what im entitled to,but not equally for my father if he is not keeping well?? Why???
New generation ki soch badlani chhahiye.
Seriously pathetic society we r living in.
@@PS-oy1elPatriarchy is pathetic. It has done no good to society.
For the first time somebody dared to tell the truth ki " pehle things were simpler..now they are much more complex"!!
Maa baap ne bacchon ko paalna is no Ehsan done to the kid..jo usne bada hokar chukaana chahye!! Azaad Kar do bacchon ko! If you say you gave good upbringing and sacrificed a lot then trust your upbringing and set them free! They will take care of you out of love and not as a duty..don't suffocate them with the load of your life and actions..
They dont trust their own upbringing, they trust their manipulation skills
सर, आपने भारतीय समाज के बेहद महत्त्वपूर्ण समस्या की चर्चा की है। अधिकांश लोग कुढ़ रहे हैं, लेकिन इस पर कोई बात ही नही करता है। हम फिनलैण्ड के बेहतरीन हैपिनेस इंडेक्स की बात तो करते हैं, लेकिन उनके सामाजिक खासकर पारिवारिक संरचना पर बात नहीं करना चाहते हैं। हमारे अभिभावक अपने जीवन के अंतिम 3 महीनों की सेवा की गारंटी के चक्कर मे बच्चों के सबसे खुशनुमा माने जाने वाले युवा उम्र 30 से 45 वर्षों की खुशियों का बलिदान चाहते हैं। वो रिश्ते तो शोर शराबे के साथ बनाते हैं, लेकिन एडजस्ट करने को तैयार नहीं हैं। इस पर गहन और खुले दिमाग से चर्चा की जरूरत है।
Great video. So true. Parents behave like businessmen by expecting returns from their children . They emotionally traumatize their children. Very nicely and honestly put !!
These perspectives are bold and deserve highest commendations. Amit Sir, your advice is beyond thanks and money.
Thank you so much. Finally we have a man speaking on family dynamics … my in-laws are 57 same age as salman khan and they want seva
Comedy aapki zabardast chalegi! Again great issue addressed. What I love about your thought process is the focus on the next generation. If we as a society help the upcoming generations in succeeding without making a big deal out of it, they will automatically be equipped and capable of taking care of the old and the aging.
My husband was a gem of a son who from the age of 21 , he was literally offered service to his parents & after his father who had cancer & passed away,husband was so good to his 4 siblings too, he kept saying it's his privilege
🙏🙏I salute such gems🙏🙏
Sir, you are godsent. I have been struggling to articulate this but have failed. You have said this beautifully. Parents are lucky to have kids. they bring so much joy and meaning to your lives! We should be thankful to our kids and stop expecting them to repay.
I am married to one and I tell him same thing.... in order to be Shravan Kumar you are making your parents handicap.
Sir, I can't tell what a big smile I have on my face while listening to you. Not that you are speaking what I think, but you are talking about a bigger issues that's engulfing our country. The comment you made about low happiness index/ problems of lower middle class and being stuck in that loop is so true. Hats off to your work and candidness.
Aap bilkul practical aur sahi baat Kar Rahe Hai.Totally agree👍 I am married to Shravan Kumar
I can say lots of things but it wouldn't be enough to say thankyou..
Mukti mil gaye mujhe to...
For last 4 years I m facing depression due to these overated dialogues of parents...😌
I did 18 years for my divorced mother.i thought she will be okay..but it's never enough for them
@@gopalmali1087After an age parents also became selfish I feel.
From past 28 years I am married to one.. I just hate him and his parents but still serving them as being a single child of my parents as all of them think it's MY duty... I hate all of them
Guru Ji ko naman 10000000000000 like
Actually mostly maa chahti hi k beta shravan kumar bane aur Bina shadi k apni seva kare lekin problem ye he k vo ye bete ko Bata nahi sakti, nahi to vo swarthy prove ho jayegi esiliye.
Yes
You are such a father figure. Thank you for being in universe.😇
I agree 👍 मुझे नहीं लगता कि हमारे पुराणों में भी श्रवण कुमार बनाने के लिए लिखा होगा,because hamari Ramayan में भी श्री राम की मांओं का कहीं जिक्र नहीं है कि श्री राम उनके साथ रहते थे, वो अपने अध्यात्म और मोक्ष के लिए तीर्थ स्थल चली गई थी और महाभारत में कुंती, गांधारी और धृतराष्ट्र जंगलों हिमालय चले गए, तो कहीं नहीं है कि वो last time में अपने बच्चों के पास रहे हो,because last time में उन्हें मोक्ष priority होती थी, ये बात सही है कि श्रवण कुमार इसीलिए था because his parents were blind
Excellent thought provoking video..The fashion of shravan kumar may be due to feeling of insecurities among the boys' mothers.
I love you for your thought process ❤️
I am mother of two and l feel so much gratitude towards them, l am so grateful to them कि वो मेरी जिंदगी में आए और मुझे मां बनने का सम्मान दिया। मेरे बच्चे ईश्वर का आशीर्वाद है मेरे लिए।
18:30 You forgot the ones who spoil all the ironed and arranged clothes that are kept in the cupboard when they pull out something to wear. Aisa bhi karte hain.
Same thing happened in my home with my mother in law.. She indulged n broke by brother in laws family n looking for another girl... Thanks sir for raising this issue
This gentleman is giving a blow to patriarchy 😆
So profound and true “ye jo tashan tha ladke waalon ka” 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Sir! Yet another superb video from you! I feel like you have put into words what is going on in my mind so beautifully! Love this channel for its fresh and reformist take on real issues faced by most people. Thanks a lot Amit sir
Thanks for kind words
Wah ji wah! Finally one video where I agree 100% Sir ji! Ek point bhi galat ya impractical nahin lagaa🙏🙏🙏
I just wish people had even 5% of sensibility as you have.
In society *Standard for expectations* from parents is low compared to expectations from kids. Kids should achieve more from the less resource but when it's kids turn to takecare of parents, quality must be high.
So true
@@problemsolution267because they forget to teach their sons basics of sewa at early-stage. They shower their son with all love n no trainings with expectations that his wife will serve them? Why wud she? She is not under any karza.
Kisliye kare sewa tune Karli kya apne saas ki bc ahsaan kar rhe ho kya paida karke aukat hi kya h tumhari hospital me admit hoza nurse Roz Teri deva karegi or itna hi ghamand h to mat Karo bacche paida
@@ninanani4085and parents forget they are nothing without children apne aap se puch kya aukat h teri society mein Bina bacche ki ya tum rahis ki aulad ho
सास को लडके की शादी के बाद ही लड़का श्रवण कुमार चाहिए होता है। शादी के पहले नहीं। हा हा हा।
Bahut bahut sahi, to the point and super awesome, I really appreciate your super wisdom. Plz continue doing such content, really country needs mentor like you.
Agree totally..... Prepare your sons from teenage to be on their own otherwise they grow up with a mentality of staying on and on in their parents house. Move them out as soon as they start earning. Let them manage themselves alone before taking on the responsibility of marriage. Give privacy and freedom to your daughter in law by giving her a separate home.... She will fall in love with her in laws.
We can't change our parents who are now in 70s or 80s. But our generation who in few years will become parents in law must learn from these videos and spread awareness by sharing these.
Amitabh Bachchan ki Maa Nirupa Roy hoti hai --seva sirf inko lagti hai ,was sooo good😂😂😂😂😂😂👌🏾👌🏾👌🏾💜💜
Very nice. Best part is you are pro daughter and pro bahu
Very refreshing
Very good topic. Parents लटक ना पड़ो अपने बेटे बहु पर।....very true.
Highly appreciated by both my wife and myself. Every topic that you speak on is impeccably presented. We couldn't agree more with your views. Very happy to know at least some like minded souls like us co exist in this world. Every thing you say SA and not NSA :-)
Very true sir,,,, bachche sach me pure soul hote hain.. Hum apne swarth me maa bap bante hain aur fir puri life us bachche par ehsaan jatate rehte hain..
What about some people, who want an earning wife but don't want to live separately from their parents?
Ask him to relocate for a larger home
Separate home will kill your finances as next generation will create discomfort again
Mere pati bhi 24 saal se shravan Kumar bane pade hain mere damm pe its bitter truth
This is great explanation. Each and every line relates to my daughter's life. Both boys side snd girls side exactly same.
U say it like it is sir . Indian family joint system is now decayed . It’s just politics and interference on in laws in sons life . Control issue and interference. It’s couple who should take control of their Marraige and have their own space . Don’t people move cities for jobs ? People go abroad for jobs and passports their parents stay back with cook maids . Indian parents should have some self respect for them selves.
Correct sir I do agree with you, that they should be a bachelor if they want to take care of only their parents my husband also same mentality’s they use to trouble me a lot but still I should shut my mouth & do seva for them from morning to night & always they pick up a quarrel with me & my husband always supported his parents even though he knew deep down in his heart ❤️ that his parents were wrong as he could never draw a line for his parents so they use to treat me like scrap as I was working initially & later started my own company but always they mocked me including husband as well the worst family I have seen in my life
I watched two videos of sir today.
One was curse of being good child in family
Second was this.......
Unfortunately my father is shravan kumar
And i am the cursed good child......
So finally someone of our parents generation is talking about this harsh truth... So here's my opinion based on what I read or studied so please sharavan Kumar's can avoid this...
So basically in India, everyone is declared as GOD... Parents are first God, babies are God, teachers are God, doctors are God... So if a human being with body of flesh and blood and with limited lower consciousness is God... Do you even know what kind of Sin is this of acknowledging human as God?
1. Specially I don't understand what special powers Indian parents get when they give birth to a baby... Foreigners also give birth of baby through same process and even animals.. so what is so special about Indian parents? If they are God then can they kill their children and give life to them once again? If not then how can be you termed as God? Srimadbhagwatgeeta clearly states that there is only one almight divine or Sachchidanand Parambrahama and every creatures on this planet are a tiny part of him including our parents.
2. Second as you mentioned in this video that bringing up the child and giving them a good life is responsibility and not sacrifice then the Indian parents emotionally blackmailing their children is not at all love... Love is always unconditional and with no expectations. Srimadbhagwatgeeta clearly states that do your duties but without any expectations and attachments so if parents are expecting that they are investigating on their children and in future they will give them back is certainly not love.
3. As you said, if a son wants to be a Shravan Kumar or Sri Ram then first of all introspect yourself that do you even have 0.1% qualities of both of them? And moreover are your parents SATYAVADI, DHARMAPARAYANA and KARTAVYANISHTHA like Sharavan Kumar's parents or Raja Dasharath? If not then how can you becom Shravan Kumar or Sri Ram.. don't abuse them by doing all these sins in name of them.
4? The most important thing, shravan kumar and Sri Ram lived in Tretayuga when Varnashram dharma was followed in society.. Brahmacharya upto 25 yrs, grihastha 26-50 yrs, vanaprastha 51-75 yrs and sanyaas 76-100... So basically when parents used to turn 51, they used to handover all the responsibilities to the couple and left home and go on teertha yatra... Main motto was to leave the materialistic world... So if you want to become shravan kumar in kalyug then your parents must leave home at 51 but no the kalyugi people want all luxuries at that age also so basically making son shravan kumar or Shri Ram is basically a ninja technique to be in the materialistic life... So if you want to follow all the rules of Satyuga, Tretayuga and Dwaparyuga in this kaliyuga period then do follow all the rules and regulations strictly and not using some of them for their own personal benifits...
Yes. They pick and choose even the portions of Dharma as per their own convenience. Whatever suits their agenda
All new couples should follow your advice. Women should stop supporting the family that exploits her
Bahut badiya hai... Maa baap ko khush rakhna hai chahe phir wife n kids ka kuch bhi ho... Ant main na ghar ka rahta hai na ghat ka... Koi khush nahi rahta
Make video on caregiver burnout for issues like elderly depression, Alzheimer's etc so people get aware and how to deal with it as children.
Your videos should be circulated in the whole country, you can bring a revolution in india, atleast young generation will understand.
Brilliantly said, Sir... Exactly resonates with my views... Always wondered why nobody thought along the same lines...
You're such a progressive thinker and a splendid speaker 👏👏👏
So blunt and hard hitting. A totally new perspective.
I was facing same situation from couple of years
But now I balanced every thing
Great explanation sir
Very much practical 🙏
Jai ho Sir.....Ye to kamaal explanation h... Too good syllabus change ho Gaya ..
Sir... You always have a way apart perspective of all the situations.... Well explained 🙏🙏🙏🙏
Best video ever I watched.... ur brilliant Sir 👏👌 my husband also same category..
I concur with each and every word of yours. Some parents think that they are no less than God. By providing the basic necessities like food, cloth and education, they show as if they are doing some 'ahsaan' on the kids.
Excellent talk needed for many... Hopefully ppl listen to you and change the way ppl think..
You are a great man .... I wish everyone thinks like you
Sir, u nailed it..... you have talked about very simple things but super sensitive
This is the harsh reality. Thank you for bringing such topics and discussing them with an open mind. 🙏🙏🙏🙏
Need more persons like you to change the society😢
Very practical approach. Bilkul sahi
This is what only girl child parents already follow what you have said and boy child parents should change
Thank you so much for this.... 🙏. I was dying inside with all the burden of sacrifices..
This was so good, so true. It was bang on. People with this mentality had to be called out. Very inspiring
Great video sir.. thank you for highlighting this truth for the society..
Very very insightful video. Everyone in India must watch this.
Dear sir, no words for this opinion, so true and right, every person has some duty towards family members but nobody should be considered as devi Or devta.
Love your style of way of speaking truth . We live life to keep happy others and keep ourselves in worries and our children always in pressure ki humne apne ma baap ko to hamesha khush rakhna hai chahe hum khush rhe na rahein. That's the truth you speak reality of our society.
Very important to talk about this particular topic , adds to unnecessary unproductive rather destructive stress on both generations involved and stops growth . Also practical thinking , respecting emotions though , but not getting carried away with emotions can bring up good solutions. But problem with us is either we are too emotional or too practical. Wahin gadbad hota hai phir . But yes big thanks for opening up this discussion much needed true service to humanity to uncover blind spots - not easy.👌👍😇🙏🏼
Very good presentation of the reality and worth listening for all in the society
So much to take way. Thank you ...🙏🌺
I am 27 years old n i sometimes try to tell the same things to my parents but they take it in negative sense. Sir, despite u r my parents' age, ur way of teaching style is superb and entertaining like the present times. Hats off to ur modern views and starting ur channel😊
@J T
May be you can get you parents to watch 'Sango life Sutras'. It might enable them to see the truth.
Same here. And people in this world only listen to those who are wealthy (bitter truth) or at position or available
They would never accept this because it will cause loss of power and authority. You may share it with others and justify your actions
I tell my dad ,please smoke,drink less. Exercise more. He took early retirement,does nothing at home. I am afraid if he will fall sick before his time. All he does is sit,drink tea,3 times meal. He won't move at all.
@@sudheerkumar4886 u r absolutely right
Wonderful watch. Eye opening and cutting edge.
Spot on. So realistic and timely for the transforming India.
Since few days I have been watching your videos ........thank you for speaking over critical and sensitive topics....... families should teach these things to new generation which they are not doing.....happy atleast you are here to educate us...........change in thought process will come for that current generation has to implement these points in Life
ह्रदय से प्रणाम आपको, इस तरह के विषय पर संतुलित विचार रखने के लिए
Wow! Amazed at your clarity of thought and articulation! ❤golden words of truth!
Somewhat same situation in Maharashtrian families. I will share this to my brother and sisters 😊
Across India
Aapane navjaat Shishu ke bare mein bilkul sahi kaha hai ki vah ek pure soul hota hai aur bahut kuchh deta hai
sir, in this way, you'll surely change our society
What you mentioned is absolutely correct sir that mother-in-laws & including husband also thinks that no matter what the daughter in law will never leave the house.... we are not that old fashioned people coz we are not dependent on anyone.... coz we are also working... & all we want is peace in life
Excellent! Straight to the heart🙏
Brilliant video. Thank you 🙏🏻