Regular Relationship Struggles vs Toxic Patterns: Discerning the Difference
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- čas přidán 28. 03. 2024
- In today's episode, I'm going to breakdown the key distinctions between troubled and toxic relationships so you can discern the difference between who to hang in there with and who to let go of.
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The notion of a flawless marriage or relationship is a myth. There's no set formula for success; what works for one couple may not work for another. Yet, I've discovered that there's always a way forward, even in the most challenging times. Five years ago, my wife and I encountered significant hurdles in our marriage that nearly led to divorce. Despite the adversity, we managed to weather the storm and emerge from it with our bond renewed and revitalized
There is a lot of sense in what you just said and I hope mine works the same way too, we are currently separated but I cant live without her, I love her so much. wish I can get her back I can do anything to have her back, we have tried therapy amongst other things
Its always difficult to let someone you love go, but in my case I had the help of a spiritual adviser who saved my marriage from collapsing her name is shelly renee white
This is helpful, I will look her up online right now...Thanks.
You wont regret it
This is Spam!! I’ve been seeing this same name in a ton of comments across the internet.
They don't value you for who you are they value you for what you do
Thank you!!! I have had that verse quoted to me more times than I can count, "only God knows the heart." My answer to them was what God said: "you shall know them by their fruit", bad fruit is the opposite of the fruit of Christ. The fruit of the Spirit of God is "love, joy, peace, gentleness, kindness and self-control." These are the character qualities of Christ, if someone does not have this fruit they do not belong to God.
Amen! Before that relationship I had all the fruits but than 3 months in the bad fruits from that person was effecting me and rubbing off of me. To the point to where it was making me sick. And I never wanted to be around the person.
This!!
"A good tree produces good fruit, and a bad tree produces bad fruit. A good tree can’t produce bad fruit, and a bad tree can’t produce good fruit. Matthew 7:17-18
This was the litmus test I used for my ex. Nice guy with a good heart but he was very troubled. His baby mama? Toxicity personified. With their traits combined... 😬 I just praise the Lord for getting me out and away from their perpetually problematic lives. He is truly a Savior. 🙌🏾
Thank you! I made a screen shot of your comment.
"Stop absorbing and start observing." 👌🏽
Yup just sit back and watch the games while being a grey rock. Eventually they flee. They need action, drama, and poo poo to fuel their toxic addictions.
Can you please make an episode of toxic parents and siblings
This was good to hear. The Holy Spirit helped me throughout my toxic relationship. I ended up divorcing the person when I realized the person I married was just trying to get my house and land. He married the lady before me and had her locked up in his place until one day the neighbor helped her to escape. He took her for 280,000. She's ended up in a nursing home which was much safer for her. I learned about this much later after being with him. Being in that toxic relationship taught me valuable lessons. The Holy Spirit showed me the truth about the person. I thought he was troubled when he was actually toxic and dangerous. God kept me safe! I am no longer gullible. 10:13 I listen to what people are saying, but pay close attention to their fruit. My ex would say one thing but do a different thing. I'm happy being single and having God and Jesus and the Holy Spirit in my life. I don't need a man. God is enough for me.
You have no idea how helpful this is right now I’ve been sitting back and observing his reactions and behaviors. He has some serious serious issues and I have no idea how I’m gonna deal with this long-term. It’s already been 14 years.
I'm so glad it was helpful
Thank you Kris for your timely video. Another emotional outburst this morning and i'm just hanging in there for the right time. Thank God for sending you into my life. It always helps me stand guard and put me back in perspective again and be firm and not soft hearted, knowing he will never change unless God works a miracle in his life. 😪
Praying for you.
Thank you for this insight. I’m in the wilderness of healing and my eyes are open and you’re always spot on. May God continue to bless you and your ministry 😘
Short vid of essential tips for keeping at bay extremely selfish people out of your life. Thank you Reese. Remain blessed and highly favored
DID NOT CLARIFY MYSELF..YES MARRIED FEELING ALONE,,,GAVE ALL I HAVE TO GIVE...FEEL USED...REALIZE NOT THE ONLY ONE IN THIS KIND OF SITUATION.... IT DOES NOT MATTER IF YOU ARE A MAN/WOMAN... STAY STRONG IN THE LORD....FOR IN SOME WAY I AM BLESSED WITH POSSESSIONS JUST NO FRIENDSHIPS.. A LONE IN A MARRIAGE.. TD
Sending love your way .
I like the way you list and explain. And especially with scripture.
His apology was sincere but timing was awful. He got caught. Then he justified by throwing it back on me. Then later apologized. I’m still discerning and observing and having none of his BS. Thank you Kris for helping me see there may be hope. Troubled, I can work with. Time will tell. I see with new eyes now.
I'm new to this channel. I like the way Kris teaches. And I read a lot of comments here. I didn't found much hate and darkness. Thies are the fruits of Kris's tree.
May it grow!
Completely true ! Personnally, I fled from the toxic person. God bless you !
Every step sounds as if you live in my home and see exactly what's going on.Wow!!!!
What a great comparison, great video, thanks for all you do :) God Bless!!
My pot-stirring SIL, of almost 40 years, told me over my dying brother's bed that we were the weirdest family she had ever met and after my brother died she never wants to have anything to do with us again. And that she was not going to let us be any part of his funeral business. She had literally stopped talking to us up to that point, telling our dying brother that we were mad at her??? Then, when my brother died, she went around crying to everyone that we weren't there for her. After smearing my nuclear family's reputation to everyone, I finally reached out to her to remind her of all of her violent words to me on the day of my brother's death. To which she replied: "I don't appreciate having words put in my mouth." ???!
She must be a gaslighter
3:09 and 6:5 says Carry your own load. We can sometimes carry their burden but they must carry their own load.
Thanks, Kris. This gives me discernment about how we got here after 26.5 years and gives me hope for further improvements in our marriage.
How do you get rid of your toxic, financially, emotionally abusive husband when they hold all the financial cards and everything is in your name not there's and my son and I have no where to go and my salary is below poverty?
11:10 Pray to God for guidance, you can do this in your mind as only God will know and can read your thoughts. Praying for you and your situation ❤ God will make a way where there seems to be no way 1 Corinthians 10: 13
Hope it helps
Girl, you just gotta pray everyday to God, Jesus and the Holy Ghost to help you in any way shape or form. Then save up money however you can. I'm in the same boat as you and that's the best advice I can give. Anchor everything into God's hands. God bless sister and have faith.
there are legal sources of assistance out there and women’s shelters to assist you with somewhere to stay. do some research. talk with a lawyer who has experience. i pray God go before you and put the right people in your path. 🙏
All I can say is… yup…
Thank you from Switzerland 🇨🇭 This video helps me discerning between troubled/toxic people 🙏🏼
Thanks for this
Thankyou so much I m learning . I finished with him
I love this explanation. Thank you so much.
Bang on boy I need help right now
Halleja I start observing, thank you for this video, it was so helpful. I am married with a toxic clergy man. May God help me to speak the truth with love come what will.❤🎉😅😢
Many thanks 🎉
Help! I’m so confused.. my husband cheated 5 years ago. I fought and stood for the marriage and he eventually came back. I’m the Christian, he isn’t. The response my husband tells me each time is he is sorry. He will hug me gently when he realize how hurt i am. But throughout the years of him saying he want to make it work, he hasn’t ever initiate any kind of work for our marriage. He kept saying he is trying and uses he works and he tries to take us out, etc. I have already addressed that those arent the resolve to the pain i have. I’m not recovering after 5 years of pain. When i would be frustrated through the years, we would argue and he has used words that imply that i need to get over it or that he will get there. As a Christian wife, i have tried to save the marriage all this time. But i am so tired now and i lost all my desire for the marriage or him. Help me understand if in am going to be judged by God if i leave him please?
As I understand the Bible you can divorce coz of infidelity, he isn’t a Christian the Bible says if a non Christian wants to stay either the Christian spouse then do so but if they don’t (cheating husband is showing he does not ) u can divorce
Thank you for this ❤
Thanks, Kris. Appreciate all your videos!
These videos are so excellent. Thanks Kris
Thanks so much for your help. You are so right on 👍
Thank u Kris! You are awesome and much appreciated ✝️💗🙏
thanks for your videos. They are very informative, well thought out in presentation and offer a very grounded biblically based approach to the topics you address. They have helped me a great deal to begin the healing process after the 5 year custody battle with my covert narc ex wife and a recent betrayal of trust from someone at work i considered a best friend. They've also helped me realize some of my own codependent traits I need to work on. thank you
Amen
Do you have videos that help Newley Christian engaged couples? And setting boundaries during the planning and before the wedding?
💯
26 years old step daughter is emotionally emerged into her mother, my wife, stepdaughter purchased a house and still staying in my home and consuming her mother my wife
I think that I may have multiple toxic people in my life . Please provide information on how to put on some PPE when dealing with the toxic person . Is it as simple as putting on the armor of God daily?? I am referring to relationships that should not be stopped altogether. Example: toxic child that has my grandchild. Thanks so much!!
Evil for me everthing he have axakly god is with me
✝️🤲🙏❤️👌👍🇵🇰
Male here
My X wife has all of these
We are divorced
Never wanted this divorce
Hope she finds whatever she is looking for or whomever she is looking for