How to find a husband // Season 3 Episode 2 | Honest Tea Talk
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- čas přidán 16. 06. 2024
- You asked. We listened.
In this episode we bring to the table the much requested topic of how to find a husband.
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About Honest Tea Talk
with Aliyah, LaYinka & Sumayah
Inspired by Jada Pinkett-Smith's 'Red Table Talk', 3 Muslim women have set up a platform to speak openly and honestly, giving viewers an unedited insight into the minds and life of Muslim women. Honest Tea Talk brings deep and often unspoken topics to the table to lay down our masks and start much-needed discussions about matters related to Muslim women and the ummah at large.
© 2021
#honestteatalk #realtalk #findingahusband
This came at just the right time for me. For the past 4 years I was dating a Muslim man in hopes of getting married to him. I was so in love. Prior to this I hadn’t known any Muslim people and he taught me a lot about the faith, I was already dressing modestly and a lot of my values aligned with traditional Muslim values anyway so I planned on taking my shahada soon and becoming a revert to officially marry him. About a month ago I figured out he had a wife and kids back in his home country. I was so devastated. I’ve been so bitter and angry but now I can accept he just wasn’t the right person for me and there is someone else out there who will appreciate me. I don’t know how I’ll find this person but I trust Allah will guide me. Thank you ladies! I have a lot to think about as I go on my journey.
I'm sorry you went through all these. I'm glad you did not allow it to affect your belief. Some wrong people come into our life for a right reason we can't see immediately. They come and shape us into the right mode for the right person to be able to come into our lives. I hope I make sense. Move on and stay firm. One day you will look back and understand why Allah allowed this to happen. I believe it will end in smile in sha Allah. Stay strong.
@@randomobserver683 Aww, thank you Kellie! That means so much! 💗
@@sma4301 Wow! I never thought of it like that! You’re so right! I think if anything I’ve grown more confident in what I’m willing to accept in a partner and not settle for. This comment is everything I needed to hear and more 💕 thank you so much 😊
@Ergo SF Dick bro why did he hide it Polygamy isn't haram but Telling lies and cheating someone is
Think before breaking up 4 years are too much damage would be really really deep
May Allah grant the person reading (if they're looking) a spouse who will be the coolness of their eyes.
Remember: Tahajjud, du'a, work on knowing and healing yourself, ask the right questions - may you succeed! 🌸
Ameen 🤲🏾✨
Wa iyyakum
Ameen Ameen.
Ameen ya raab
Ameen
"Good women are for good men, and good men are for good women"
Yh that’s true but it’s also more than just that. That is just the basic foundation. Another important aspect is compatibility.
Alhamdulillah, may Allah ( Subhanahu Wa Ta’Ala) bless you and me and all Muslim brothers and sisters and our families
This is not correct neither a precise translation of the Quran ... seems that you don't know Arabic, be careful man
In jannah
What if good woman married to bad man
Hey Beautiful! “You don’t need someone to complete you! You need someone to complement you! “
It was so beautifully said Allahuma barik
Compliment ☺️
Mashallah lots of complimets
I (LaYinka) definitely said complement; and him being generous with compliments is a good thing, too. 😁
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👌🏽👌🏽
"We are in this Dunya to save our souls, your partner needs to feed health into your soul" 🙌🙌💯💯👏👏👏
What if your partner is draining your soul?
@Franca Wong I didn’t, my family chose
@Franca Wong so you’re trying to say I have a bad soul?
@Franca Wong at what point did I say I was an angel? Stop making assumptions, you know nothing about my life.
@Franca Wong funny how you think that responding to your rude comment with the same energy means I have a bad soul, you should really re-evaluate your life.
The childhood trauma and healing questions are so so so important. Forget "What's your favorite color?" and get in deep conversations instead. Be attentive to how the potential spouse behave with their parents, friends, strangers. Notice how they react when they are presented with a problem or resistance. Do they communicate efficiently? Do they close down and give you the silence treatment? Do they pay attention to your opinions, values...
Emotional intelligence is something I wish I was taught before getting married and I would have looked for in my partner.
Take your time to ask those questions. Look for actions that show congruency between words and behavior. ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS.
Assalamualaikum
Let us point out what the Qur'anic verses on polygamy actually say: "If you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, marry women of your choice, two or three, or four; but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly (with them) then only one." (Al-Nisa', 4:3)
A subsequent verse states: "You are never able to be fair and just between women even if that were your ardent desire." (Al-Nisa', 4:129)
It is clear from this verse that:
First, the Qur'an does not give men the blanket right to have more than one wife. Polygamy is not a right, but a responsibility to ensure social justice for orphans. What Allah has granted is in fact a restriction on an existing practice of that time when men could marry as many wives as they wanted.
Second, because polygamy is not a right, Allah placed conditions on its practice. There is an overriding concern for justice in this short verse, and conditions are set to ensure that justice is done.
Condition A: Polygyny is permitted within the context of war and orphans. It is permitted only if the men fear they would not be able to deal justly with the orphans.
Condition B: The man who wants to be polygynous must have the capacity to be fair and just to all his wives. The verse is a call for just conduct towards women, not a right for men to fulfill their alleged lustful desires or their egos. And just treatment here means more than a man's financial capacity to support more than one wife: He must be fair in all ways, including in the time, support, and companionship he provides to his wives and children.
Condition C: If the man fears he cannot deal justly with all his wives, then Allah advocates that he should marry only one as this will ensure equality. This is explicitly stated in the verse
No man in my family is a dog, all men in my family have 1 wife and loyal to wives! Got that
@bramejm if your wife is okay with polygamy good for you but don't force it on others like EVERY man has to have more than one wife
@@sagiri__ Excuse sir
but plz research seriously seen a lot like u. who just inform but really without any proper research
We have to have certain principles (for men to have four wives and hey nones forcing
just think about the ladies who are devorced some of them are old they some are depressed some are poor
And some men cannn provide them with sufficient love food and necessities if they can treat them equally then (there can be more principles ) they can go for that it's their choice nones forcing any1
A deal breaker for me was what is my future in-laws attitudes towards me? What impression they leave me when we first interact? I didn’t want to marry someone if his parents didn’t even like me. I wanted to be apart of a family that is welcoming. Don’t forget to do istikhara prayer my dear sisters ❤️.
رزقك الله ما تتمنيه ♥️♥️♥️
That is what you think
Omg I was saying this to be sister. That would be a dealbreaker for me
Alhamdullahi. you break off you did yourself a favor never settle for less. bad in laws will ruin your life. may ALLAH find you righteous husband & righteous in law.
: Well, let me remind you that you are not getting married to the whole family, you are only getting married to one person and as long as you both love or care about each other may be the most important thing about it, so it seems like you don't have a good reason to reject someone just because their family don't like you.
A true pleasure to watch mature women to talk between themselves about having a husband, building a family, and finding their leader. This is unseen in the western world, where women will be talking about the new Satisfyer version, about how much do they hate their husbands, and about their new lovers. If you are a princess, you will find your prince.
I’m Sikh and 27 and this was nice to watch. I completely agree that don’t wait for a guy to complete you. You complete yourself! Find someone who compliments and understands you. I’m happy on my own and If marriage happens it happens.
I'm 27 as well.
Have you been or are you being pressured to marry?
@@Sona77. You definitely are worth it and the right person will see that, just do you until you find the one
Hey dear Sikhni sister. Welcome to the community of religious sisters uniting in our struggles, experiences and feelings. I´m glad to see a friend from another faith watching a clip that is really universal. I often see Christian friends watching "Muslim" oriented clips as well. Much love and respect from a Muslim, Canadian-Pakistani sister!
Wealth and children are the adornment of this worldly life, but the everlasting good deeds are far better with your Lord in reward and in hope. 18:46
Please remember why we are on this earth.. and yes sister if marriage comes it’s comes, how many times do Allah say in the Quran that we would get a spouse in jannah ❤️🤲🏾
I’m a 24 man
@@NM-vb1xo How do you know that?
By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.” - Socrates
"Lower your standards...." *holds breath*
"... is bad advice!" *sighs in relief* 😭
Never lower your standards!
Yes but in what context? Sorry didn't watch the video yet.
@@hellfirejahannam7734 lol your profile name. Love how women have bad experience and then blame all men. I'm not married, but that's unreasonable. It's like saying all women are slu.ts, based one example.
Never lower your standards when you get into 30+ age. Just enjoy dying alone with cats and dogs.
The best Dua to make for a spouse, at least in my opinion, ask Allah to send you someone that You NEED! What I have learned from my experiences is that many times what we think we want turns out to be things we despise. Only Allah knows you best, so who better to ask than The One who created you. Like they say, be careful what you ask for!
MashaAllah wonderful and important advice! Tabarakallah gorgeous 🥰
And you got the couple with this dua???
This is the most wholesome ‘finding a spouse’ video I’ve seen so far 👏🏼 can’t wait for future parts
Very informative talk. Any tips for young boys to look for their future wife?
Those who are married and did not get the chance to ask all those questions...any guidance?
@@uzmanasir69 Focus on yourself first before seeking a wife
I second this, and I have seen lots of videos
My biggest fear is never getting married because I just don't know how to go about it. But for now I'm trying to make peace with it but inshallah I will find someone.
let me know who you are? I can spread the word around.
Where about you based sis. Don't be specific. There's crazies on the web
North of England in my city I live in a mostly white area.
@@alishataylor9480 what?? That's not bad . I thought you were gonna say Finland or something lol. Maybe try to relocate to another northern city like Manchester, Leeds, bradford. Plenty of Muslims there . To actually communicate with them could try a marriage app. If they are serious they'll come to meet you .
I agree with you , my parents would never let me move to be honest I think the main issue is how to even meet people like I've finished uni I wish I hung out with more people at uni so I could have spoken to more etc. Now I just don't know what to do.
“Women can also see” yess Summaya 😂😂😂😂
@Maksud Mehraz who said that they HAVE to be beautiful? Women are meant to be good Muslims and if they are beautiful that is that. You can take care of yourself without being defined by your beauty. Women aren’t defined by their beauty. Women don’t owe anyone beauty
@Maksud Mehraz NO. Societies around the world just sexualise women in a way that they don’t sexualise men. That’s why people pay more attention to women’s appearances. This has nothing to do with men being visual creatures. They are visual but women are not meant to be valued solely based on their appearances. They are full human beings. Mind, body and soul. Thanks and goodbye
@Maksud Mehraz Don’t men also have beauty? In my opinion, both genders are good looking because Allah made us.
@Maksud Mehraz and what are women supposed to do when they are not a certain height, have a slim thick body, certain skin tone and features? You’re talking as if all women meet the beauty standards. We don’t. There are women out there who get rejected based on her skin tone, height etc.
@Maksud Mehraz women do get rejected for their height, it happens. For those under 5 feet and yes, weight can be controlled.
"Women can see too" lol! This was a fun and thought-provoking talk.
Jazakallah khayran sisters ❤
Im a male and I have learnt so much from my 3 sisters, jazakAllah khair!! Keep sharing your wisdom and experiences please...
One of my greatest fear is not finding a man to get married to, but getting married to the man I really desire, rather than settling for what I see for certain reasons. In the light of this fear, sometimes I wonder If what I want is too much and I'd consider lowering it. Another time, I'd believe what I want exists, I'm just yet to get it.😌
This blessed me. I needed it!
Thanks for being honest and real, beautiful sisters. May Allah reward you richly. Amin
Aaah I love what the sister said “maybe you don’t need good maybe you want better than good and Allah has someone perfect for you “ well said sis and thank you for saying that for many years people keep telling me that I am picky haha now I know I am not picky and Allah has someone special for me 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
nobody is perfect you lol, it's very bad cope
This is the type of shows we need more on CZcams.....clear,concise,honest conversations for the young generation to take heed!
Keep it up
I was here thinking “these fine ladies in their 20s are really smart”, then she goes and drops “my 16 years old daughter”, then vampires, these ladies are vampires
they clearly weren't in their 20s imo, nice that you thought that tho I guess
they do look quite young for their age tbh. Mashallah
They look in their 40s. You need to go to the opticians.
@@jahanghir528 it's giving hater
Black don’t crack
Three Most beautiful Ladies made it understand beautifully for a divorced girl to wear c0nfidence to marry again....Great respect to these p0sitive Women❣
I had a freind who was married for a month which then scared her not to marry for a couple of years. Al humdulillaah, she's married now. And then i know sisters who jump from husband to husband straight after their divorce so it depends on the person's attitude and confidence. I must say first sister was more shy and quite while the other sisters (marriage to marriage) were more confident / extroverts
"We
are in this dunya to save our souls. Your partner needs to feed health into your soul in order for you to give the best of yourself to Allah. You are better off on your own feeding, nourishing your soul yourself, than to just accept anything due to feeling lonely"
Needed to hear this.
: Not every thing you said seems to be right, so I gave your comment a 'like' because of the right thing in it! let me also remind you that knowledge is every thing, if you have knowledge, then you would always know the right thing to do and the wrong thing not to do.
Divorced woman has more experience in life and protected from mistake in relationships. Respect!
Like These Women would give their sons to a Girl with a kid. I wonder who would, I hope they keep their word in 23 years or so.
@@blueflame3531 who wouldn’t?
@@fatimajama634 You'd let your son at age 24 marry a 32 year old with a kid?
@@blueflame3531 yeah what’s wrong wit a single mother ?
@@qt354 where did I say that tf?
Sometimes it’s ok, to look at everything and maybe decide “You are just not ready” and you should be honest with yourself in asking “I’m I ready?” Cause sometimes people get married because it seems like it’s expected of them!
Right!
@Franca Wong I respectfully disagree with you, if someone feels like there not ready, they don’t have to get married, YES! even at 30! Marriage is sunnah and a big responsibility. No two people are the same, so no one should be pressured to get married just because they are getting older. And I’m not 30, I’m 20 so I got time and a bit of developing to do. No pressure!
Hello, I'm absolutely delighted that you all are back. I've missed you all so much. You bring amazing inspiration 🙌 to subjects for Christian and Muslim females alike. You influence us all. Please please continue my friends and I look forward the episodes. Thanks again.
Thank you for being so candid and saying what we are all thinking.
I have been reflecting on this alot, especially coming from a narcisstic family and the need to heal is so important before finding a spouse. One thing i learnt about being around/raised by narcissists is you either end up mirroring them, or you reduce yourself and serve them..and this only mirrors in future relationships if its not dealt with. On a journey to accepting myself, knowning my boundaries and sticking to my priciples. InshAllah.
there should be a part 2 of this episode I always feel so blessed by listening to you ladies. God bless you all abundantly
I am watching this from Somalia. This is very important topic but let me add this ; a year back when I was in my last year of the university in a certain period the lecturer told us " I know you all have someone in your mind that you would love to marry, but that kind of person only exists in your mind and hearts . You need to give up something , you need to make the list of the qualities you look for in women less otherwise you people will be single forever ". After one year I came to know that everyone of us has to give up something in order to marry.
Greetings to you guys.
But how to know if you can deal with sth or not as you had not experienced this before?
The part with asking him about his PAST was really deep and insightful👏🏻
Love this series! You ladies are so articulate with your thoughts and cover important topics often brushed upon or not considered that serious within our community. Keep up the great work and may Allah bless you for your efforts!
Did I just watch this two times in a row ? Of course I did. So inspiring ! 🤍
Summayah input is just everything! Thank you ladies for this plateforme
I wish these kind of conversations were able 20 years ago , it would of helped me aloooooooooot to make the right choice on the right time, honestly if you are young take advantage.
Hello ladies! Another amazing talk as always! I think one question which is absolutely paramount to ask is what their relationship is like with their parents/ siblings. That will give you a clue as to what kind of person they’ll be in your family unit.
If they hold resentment for their family and haven’t evolved out of their childhood wounds with maturity and awareness they’re not going to be the best husband, father, son in law or brother in law for you and your family.
The Only thing that i can say after listening to you guys for the first time... Is you people have given voice to atleast my major thoughts... Thank you guys for being the real.
Salam ladies. Thank you for this, I'm currently going through the searching process. Its been...going. These reminders are just what I need now. So thanks and keep on being the fabulous you!
Run a credit check - indication of responsibility
Run a Criminal background -
Judge men by their actions not by their words.
Love this idea. So smart
Your right sister.but i know good guys with bad credit .
@VALIDATION 32 how would check how fertile he is?
Hey, running a criminal background in what sense? I know people who spent time in jail and have a serious criminal record. They are still married. Some found a wife after their release. In the country like the USA everyone can get a criminal record for nothing. Getting to know the person and taking time is wiser than running a criminal check
@VALIDATION 32 if she is divorced how can she be virgin? Islam allows divorce right? Do you also expect the man to be virgin?
Loved this! 🙌🏽 definitely need multiple parts especially on the questions you can ask
I was given the advice to pay attention to how he treats the waiter (or anyone serving you). Because you're on a date, he's going to be trying to impress you, but where his personality will really shine through is how he treats others.
Dating is haram
@@razer0072073 ouchie.
@@razer0072073 lol
@Ebony_Gambian That's what they all say
JazakAllah khair this was sooo refreshing and helpful. Please, please do a part 2 more on the questions to ask!!! Salam and duas to all you amazing women!
The ex - so good! The only thing that was not mentioned that should have been in this regard is how he talks about the ex. If it was, “She’s crazy, she’s this and that,” not always but very often, it’s a RED FLAG that HE was actually doing those things. The person also denigrating their ex is not a good reflection on them and tells you what you can expect if things go wrong in your union.
Facts!! And also it may seem he isn’t over her or the marriage or how things went down.
Sumayah mentioned this point. She said to listen to how he talks about his ex-wife @ 26:09.
@@jewelssparks3648 She did but what I meant was that a further, clearer explanation of that point could have been given including the danger of how abusers in particular speak about their exes. I understand how and why they wouldn’t have expanded on it as they have a lot to cram in but I wanted to mention it as I think it’s a very important point - one that can save many people from future heartache in shaa Allaah.
This applies to girls too. If they are saying only bad and how old husband was abusive, red flag.
@@absolutelynobody3837 Agreed! It’s universal.
I absolutely love this episode Ma Sha Allah!! Very contemporary and realistic!! I love the "talk about childhood""friends " and the "ex"....definitely need more episodes😍🤩
This couldn't be more perfect! Thank you ladies for sharing knowlege and great things to look for in marriage!
Ma Sha Allah, there are so many women out there who need guidance along these lines, you all are helping all of us, thankyou so much
"Choose the best for your soul " ❤
We only leave once, let’s choose the best for our souls..... period❤️
@@aishahussein2072 Men choose the best for their souls also we're not settling any for any less than what we deserve especially divorcees who have kids like why would we have leftovers and women don't want men who have kids so don't you dare say men should accept women who have kids.
: Yes, you are right as long as you know what the best is, some people may talk about the best but they may not even know what the best is.
@@aishahussein2072 : As long as you know what the best is not if you don't even know what the best is, you also need to know that humans lives more than once not just once.
@Franca Wong : Not only their parents but give everyone the treatment they deserve, treat people the way they need to be treated not just your parents.
Having these conversations is very essential. Thank you for bring it to limelight.
Love you three, sisters. You've stimulated my thoughts. Waiting for the next one. And , I love the CG too, the way you appear on the screen and grab your coffee. Love it too much.
You are so inspiring Masha’Allah! May Allah reward you for being honest and real! Love to listen to you!
We seriously need part 2,3,4,5..... i really enjoyed this, jazaakumullah khairan sisters. May Allah reward you for this
Be true to yourself be honest caring loving & humble. Men will appreciate you for this.
Honesty from day one is so important.
This was excellent!! Thank you for sharing and discussing this as a topic. I felt like you Sistas were spot on!
The part about the dealbreakers is so true though - in the long run - it’s not just that they build up. It’s also when the infatuation or the excitement during the initial period wears off it’s the little things that flare up/surface/take precedence and become a real issue that can have a huge impact on the relationship.
I enjoyed this video but I feel like the title should be changed, I was expecting a video on how to actually find a potential spouse in a halal way (for those who are not having an arranged marriage for example). I feel like this video more addressed what to ask a potential spouse when you are courting. Maybe you could do another video addressing how to go about meeting someone, I would love to get your input on that inshallah!
Jazakallah so much this was I am looking for guidance ....when is the next honest talk episode
How to meet a potential is wide just make sure when you are interacting/texting for the first time you keep within boundaries and be modest and straighforward
The halal way is to not directly interact with the opposite gender until you have your wali present.
@@onlyallahisworthyofworship5599 not exactly your wali doesn’t need to be present you can introduce yourself to an individual and let him know you are interested and if he is to, then tell him to talk to your wali.
@@onlyallahisworthyofworship5599 I don't have a wali for example. I think it would be a little unfair to me if I couldn't talk to a potential suitor. I would happily have my sister around when meeting in real life though
You ladies are so incredible, well put together, articulate and insightful. The community needs this podcast. Lots of love to all three of you mashallah may Allah increase you
Sisters please make a part two of this topic .. Love listening the wisdom you share ❤️
This talk is much needed in our community. Thank you so much! Would you consider discussing modern dating? Using dating apps and the like?
THESE TALKS ARE SOO UNDERRATED AND NEED TO BE A MANDATORY WATCH FOR AL MUSLIM WOMEN!
I'm Christian and this totally resonated with me.
And men also - it's important to know what the women want and expect from us. lol this is like a cheat code for me
We definitely need more Episodes on this topic!! Can`t wait :) Jazakallah khairan
Such great words of wisdom! Love this. Very applicable and empowering, even for Christians or non-religious people.
Brilliant discussion sisters, keep up the good work, you are guys doing amazing job.
As someone who is now entering the 'looking out for a partner' phase this was extremely helpful. Thaaank you three, I love all of your talks so much. May Allah reward you for the knowledge you are spreading on not so much discussed topics and grant you all jannah firadaus in sha Allah ameen🥰 and one of the best things on CZcams was to come across the honest tea talk. It's actually funny because I was trying to search the red table talk and I think that's how I came across you guys. In addition I was studying for my finals at the library and took a break watching the first episode. xx greetings from Germany💫👏🏿
Oh. How is Germany?
Oh my God, can you do a second part ASAP!! I needed this
YESSS loved it!! Definitely sharing with my friends!! 😍 Thank you so much sisters, JazakAllah!!
This is definitely eye opening I am so grateful to be in your space sisters. Jazzakillah kheyr. ❤️❤️❤️
I'm a woman and when I see another woman who is confident and has built herself and is doing something with her life like maybe helping the community in some way, no matter how old is she and she hasn't gotten married yet, I do admire her and I feel that she is the perfect wife to anyone because she is not just sitting there waiting to a husband to come.
Sometimes disillusionment is the reality of your circumstances, it's not about seeking/looking for a husband but possibly that there isn't anyone out there e.g.age, family circumstances, physical conditions, it would be nice to have a talk about for women who have to come to terms with life as a single person/parent.
I was dubious about clicking on this but it was a really well-rounded discussion! I wish I had found this in my time of need but it's brought me hope for the future at least. Thank you.
The way you are putting the prespectives is just awsome .
I was so happy they mentioned how important it is to ask these questions face to face. I couldn't agree more. You cant believe what someone says through text and the phone. It could be scripted.
I think something really important that is often overlooked is emotional maturity and rationality and being present. Will this person acknowledge your thoughts and your feelings in a healthy and responsive way or do they have defective mechanisms of processing emotion or reacting to conflict that will leave issues unresolved? Will they be able to step outside of their opinions and what they've always assumed, to relate to your point of view about things?
Really liked this talk. Very insightful. I also cannot stress enough the power of duaa especially in the last third of the night. That's how my sister got married actually to her now wonderful husband of 10 years mashallah.
I’m so happy you’re back! What an insightful conversation mashallah ❤️
i miss these ladies. I am rewatching some episodes bcz why not, and they spoke so direct to me❤ ❤❤
I just discovered them.
Being yourself, and knowing yourself is so important. Lower your standards for no one, because most men will not do it for women.
I love it “women can also see”. 😂 Yes we have feelings and eyes too. I hate that society feels that we should accept a guy even if he is unattractive, while we have to look like a barbie with an expiration date...”if not married by this time, discard” 🤦🏾♀️
This episode touched many important points for me to type, but sister Aliyah's take on looking into yourself as you are looking for a pair really resonated with me. Thank you sisters for sharing some new perspectives. PS: the way sister Sumayah says funny things with a deadpan look is so hilarious!
mashallah, i think you can apply this talk to even everyday relationships with friends, family, coworkers , etc
The girl in green is super intelligent!!!
You girls are great, very good video 😘
This episode has just been like the beautiful poem that has touched my heart so beautiful.
What a beautiful tea talk ladies
We need part 2,3,4,5,6,7......😊❤️
AS SALAAMU ALAYKUM SHUKRAN FOR YOUR PLATFORM, IT'S SO NEEDED!!
Thanks ladies us single need to hear these kinda of conversation May Allah SWT reward you guys Allahuma Ameen 🙏🏾🤲🏾😊
Asking about childhood is an amazing point! Mashallah ♥️🌿
Part 2, 3, 4, and all that! Wallahi such an amazing episode!!!!
Just came across your channel.Lovely topic ladies. I know alot of people who need to hear this.
thank you so much sisters for this video. this was so needed.
10:15 that reminded me of another interesting talk by Dr Tariq Habib discussing when girls didn't get the affection of their fathers (!!) And how this can negatively influence them in choosing a future husband - they might chose a man who they seem able to replace that void of not having had a "present" dad role in their childhood and not searching instead for values of a husband.
And this journey of self discovery and healing is an often overlooked one........
@@Hiba-zo1km Just look up "girls with daddy issues". Even none-Islamic sources are great. You'll quickly understand the brute psychology behind daddy issues, and you'll be able to improve.
@@Hiba-zo1km it's was a side issue he discussed not the main topic plus it's in Arabic. If still interested I'll post the link in sha Allah:)
@@ColonelFluffles LOL, Geert. Wat doe jij in in de moslimse vrouwenhoek??? Moslimse hoek nog wel hahaha
@@xSunnyDaysx Ik heb me bekeerd. Ik wil nu Islam fisabilillah verspreiden over heel Nederland en west Europa, In sha Allah.
@@JDforeveralone pls share
Asw! Thank you sisters . Very important point and massages. I have spread your channel to my Ethiopian community in Dallas. Keep up the good work . Masha Allah!🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺
These discussions are just getting more interesting and enlightening, Jasak Allahu Khair sisters. May Allah protect and bless you all, Aameen
This is so good. You have provided a representation of a contemporary muslim woman's guide/thought process to find a husband. No submissiveness or compromises as expected out of woman usually. I am glad I came across this video! Thanks Ladies!
men want submissive obedient woman. they don't want to marry another man
These sisters make me feel like home, always. 😭❤️❤️
Absolutely LOVED these ladies idea's. Looking forward to more parts surrounding this topic 🤍
This is very helpful, people can make you feel your feelings are invalid, that you're being picky, that you can't find a 10/10, well, no one is expecting to live in a rose tinted world but I know what I want and I want a balance of all the attributes that are important to me.. I've been feeing unsure but listening to this video made me feel reassured. Jazakum Allah al-Khair
9:43 Oooh Yes.... I begin to realise things...thank you so much for your talks, they benefit a lot of women in sha Allah 💚💚
I know this is not related to topic but you guys are looking so beautiful 😍😍😍. BarakAllahu feek💛
Allahumma barik
Say Maasha Allah 😁❤️
@@halalpolice7544 mashAllah
mashallah
Let us point out what the Qur'anic verses on polygamy actually say: "If you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, marry women of your choice, two or three, or four; but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly (with them) then only one." (Al-Nisa', 4:3)
A subsequent verse states: "You are never able to be fair and just between women even if that were your ardent desire." (Al-Nisa', 4:129)
It is clear from this verse that:
First, the Qur'an does not give men the blanket right to have more than one wife. Polygamy is not a right, but a responsibility to ensure social justice for orphans. What Allah has granted is in fact a restriction on an existing practice of that time when men could marry as many wives as they wanted.
Second, because polygamy is not a right, Allah placed conditions on its practice. There is an overriding concern for justice in this short verse, and conditions are set to ensure that justice is done.
Condition A: Polygyny is permitted within the context of war and orphans. It is permitted only if the men fear they would not be able to deal justly with the orphans.
Condition B: The man who wants to be polygynous must have the capacity to be fair and just to all his wives. The verse is a call for just conduct towards women, not a right for men to fulfill their alleged lustful desires or their egos. And just treatment here means more than a man's financial capacity to support more than one wife: He must be fair in all ways, including in the time, support, and companionship he provides to his wives and children.
Condition C: If the man fears he cannot deal justly with all his wives, then Allah advocates that he should marry only one as this will ensure equality. This is explicitly stated in the verse
It really is soothing to see bring up topics on like these
I want to thank you women for being so completely honest and help us women realize our potential that "women can actually see and we are not be treated are second class citizens''. Very well said. May the Allah bless you all with the best. Aameen.
Assalaamu Alaykum, another insightful and much-needed episode during these times especially! Barak Allahu feek for providing this as part of another exciting season, may Allah continue to put barakah in these episodes and that people act upon the guidance from the Quran and Sunnah whilst having the correct understanding of the Companions, Ameen. Having said that, I would like to suggest the next possible topic to cover in the upcoming episodes, that is either the topic of how the wedding night should be and how it can be practiced according to the sunnah as unfortunately many etiquettes have sadly been forgotten around this area, or secondly, the topic of how to balance love and worship in terms of not being obsessed with your spouse which can lead to shirk! I think these could be very practical and beneficial to those looking to get married and to those who are currently married. Keep up the great work!
Amazing discussion ladies, may Allah reward you for this good deed. I agree on the part 2,3, 4, 5, there is a need (a thirst actually) for such open honest discussions.
Now, to all the women out there, please do not lower your standards, have faith. If we as a collective demand better, we will get better, because we deserve sooo much better. I deserve the best and you deserve the best. To be loved, respected and honoured in the way that you want and need. This is not a fantasy, it is realistic, if you believe it to be. Continue on your healing journey, love, respect and honour yourself. ❤🌹
Well done ladies , you kill that topic.👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
The 3 of you are the real deal. You guys are the Queens with the Golden crowns. Could you please do a Part 2 of this and focus it on Young Career Women who have never been married but are told to lower their standards and give up their Educational/career goals in order to not drive men away. Also, please speak about knowing someone before Marriage, while Persuiding your education. I get issues of these all the time and I will love to hear you guys speak more about it.
: If your standards are reasonable, then you don't need to lower them, always remember that there are people that would give you some really bad advise but they would act or pretend like they are giving you good advise, always remember that if you take wrong advise from people, then you gonna be the one that's gonna suffer the serious pain that the wrong guy is gonna be imposing on you, the people that may give you the wrong advise are not gonna be the ones to suffer the pain from the wrong guy, the guy is gonna be imposing the serious pain on you not on them, so you really need to be careful about the kind of guy you get into a serious connection with if you don't want something really evil to happen to you and your life.