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Femininity: 1 - Accepting; receiving: YOU ARE THE DIVINE FEMININE. YOU ARE THE QUEEN. 2 - Communicating your needs. Speaking Up. RADICAL HONESTY. 3 - Choosing a partner who wants the same Life objectives/values... If you're avoidant, you most likely have said to family members - who had a major role in your childhood: "You only accepted me or liked me when I was happy/obedient/emotionless." This one simple statement fits with ALL the core symptoms of avoidant attachment: 1. Being overly self-reliant (and in doing so, you hide your needs, emotions, problems, and acute illnesses) 2. Pushing down anger until it explodes and manufactures the boundaries you crave but can't always ask for 3. Not wanting to burden others with your problems 4. Wanting to fix your own issues to avoid looking incompetent or even getting bullied and teased/mocked 5. Numbing out emotions with self-soothing behaviors that are either totally unhealthy or pseudo-healthy (like getting addicted to working out and healthy eating) Remember ALWAYS this process is all about YOU!!! Not him. He is just a catalyst. Consider, he may be your twin flame. Look into that. After he initiated your trauma, you're now left to deal with and to heal: all that has come to the surface. GOOD! This is a blessing. Albeit painful. A necessary blessing, nonetheless. HUGE-HUGE gift! Major advice!!! Listen closely!!! NEVER ever CHASE HIM. He will run further and you will lose yourself more. You are the feminine. You are the divine goddess. You just be and approve (or disapprove) whoever comes along. It's a yes: you meet my requirements, or: it's a no, you do not. Be clear on whom you're accepting as a partner and DO NOT settle for less (or you just delay what's meant for you). Accept your struggle, anxiety, fear, sadness. Whatever comes up. It's all human, and in need of your attention. If you push it away, block it, or run from it... You will just have to deal with it later... 1) Put yourself first and foremost! 2) Fall in love with yourself. Be your own dream girl. Glow up and level up. Be the best version of yourself. 3) Rejection is redirection. Embrace the energies of miraculous possibilities. And, Any time you have a painful thought/memory/flashback/worry/belief: 1. Find the belief... 2. Write 11 DISADVANTAGES to having the belief 3. Write 11 ADVANTAGES to having the belief If you can NOT find advantages then that’s EXACTLY why you're stuck!! When you finally see both sides... Your mind will STOP thinking about it 'cause your brain will be rewired. So you gotta keep at it, until you find the positive to the negative... And therefore, ultimately rewire your brain! AND REMEMBER: STOP making it all about manifestation when really, it's actually all about VIBRATION! If you haven't heard today... You are so very loved and you are so very worthy of love. The hardest part is learning to love yourself and to know: it's not all your fault, and to see: that you're beautiful; wonderfully perfectly brilliantly created. You're stronger than most; a true leader/warrior in the making. Keep going and keep thanking. Remember Jesus was an outcast and he suffered more than any human being could ever endure... And the most important message here is to forgive them and to forgive yourself and to love all. Keep walking in truth. One of the great poems of the Zen tradition ends with this description of the awakened state: “To be without suffering over imperfection(s).” AFFIRMATIVE PRAYER: I am one with the Divine. I experience, peace, BLISS, love, and joy: CONSTANTLY AND CONSISTENTLY. I experience everything as grace AND AS LOVE. I am at peace. I honor the Divine within me.
How To Be more feminine : 1- Start accepting, recieving. 2- Comunicating our needs. Speaking Up. 3- Choising a partner who wants the same Life objectifs (starting a family or not …etc)
difficult to receive when uve had to sleep with someone twice against your will because you were charged with being the house-sitter, without being asked, so thought it your duty to protect the family furniture, fittings etc, but then suffered awful social degradation, including from same ppl who volunteered you to be surrogate parent and 'sitter', and psychological pain, as a result.
@@draftcomment2comment232 Sleeping with someone against your will has nothing to do with receiving. It's called rape, and it's a crime. It's absolutely normal to feel psychological pain after such an experience, I hope you can find help, and if possible, report the offender to the police.
@draftcomment2comment232 In the most kind way, I hope that you consider talking to the police and a therapist (if you're not already) vs the internet. Someone forcing you to sleep with them against your will is a crime, and there's not much that we here in the internet comments can do. All the best to you and your healing. 💛🙏🏾
Thats not being feminine. Those things are common sense regardless of gender. Being feminine is the opposite of being masculine. But a woman that knows how to kick ass can still be very much feminine.
In some other interviews she has actually openly admitted she has self-confidence issues and is frequently self-deprecating to sort of pre-emptively appease an expected aggression she has experienced most of her professional life. Which to me is quite heart-breaking because she is very intelligent and well spoken. But apparently in her field if you are those things but ALSO choose to express yourself in an attractive and ladylike way, everyone just automatically assumes you're a bimbo or a slut or whatever. And would frequently treat her very disrespectfully. So she developed mechanisms to work around that and make herself more likeable, but I think it came at the cost of some pretty deep internal self esteem. She's not faking being nice. She's faking NOT being insecure. And thats a sad thing for anyone to have to do. And worse when there's literally NOTHING for her to be insecure about but she still feels that way because of years of abusive treatment...
I understand on the surviving mode, and being tired. I was with a feminine man before, and he doesn’t like to make decisions and take the lead. I ended up leading on everything. In the end, I got exhausted, and we broke up. Being with a masculine partner now, and I let him lead (He is happy to lead), and I am so peaceful and happy. When I don’t have to think of our next step all the time, I have sometime to think about the next step for myself. ❤️
I like Sadia because she mentions that she has made the same mistakes too. She is relatable and not pretending she gets it right all the time herself ❤
Love your encouragment to hold true for what you need and your value. So many people sacrifice and drop their standards because they feel starved of love. Keep reinforcing your own self worth and your own self love and don't accept crumbs !! xx
I once saw a quote on FB. It said "Women are not here to do what men can do, we are here to do what men can't do." I thought that was interesting. It seems the concepts of masculinity and femininity have both become very twisted and tied up into a Gordian knot in our culture. It has become very difficult to unravel. This could become a very long post but I will try and be concise. Somewhere along the line women were brainwashed into thinking that nurturing was analogous to being subservient or servile which was somehow seen as "less than." Of course there are many things that men and women can BOTH do, but I think the point of the quote was thought provoking. Men have really been painted into a corner too. Many of the inherently masculine characteristics are now being termed "toxic." Certainly the negative interpretations of this may be true, particularly for men themselves. If you haven't read it, I recommend The Hazards of Being Male. The positive manifestations of masculinity and femininity both should be embraced, encouraged and celebrated. I think the beginning of the problem started with the assumption of gender roles being the ONLY choice for men and women and that they had to be very rigid and were used to force people into molds that were not natural to them but were promoted as being the only acceptable societal choice. Many people are quite happy in embracing traditional gender roles as delineated in Western society. Not everyone is, and we all need to find (or make) our own place in the world. When certain psychological characteristics were determined to be masculine or feminine, it caused a divide. We all have both kinds of characteristics to a greater or lesser degree. I am pretty much a tomboy but loving and nurturing people and animals comes very naturally to me and I embrace it as the best part of myself. I became a caregiver, nursing assistant and mental health therapy tech. I love the part about anticipating needs - very important in both personal and business relationships. Customers like to feel nurtured and cared for too. One comment on the pleasure part mentioned in this video. Pleasure is not the same as happiness. Dr.Robert Lustig's Pleasure vs Happiness videos are wonderful and say it much better than I can- long versions and short versions both available on CZcams.
I think conservative religion, any conservative religion, has played a big part in making the roles very rigid with women on the losing end. As for masculine traits, those labeled toxic are the ones that insecure, emotionally troubled, or narcissistic men use such as being domineering and putting down women and wanting to control them.
I have both energy ,I am brutally feminine soft woman ,I can go from one extreme to another in a second! I know my power ! Depends on the situation and work I’m doing
@123smarties Have you ever seen a bear protecting her cub? Now, if the Bible warns you that there is no comparison between said bear and a woman scorned, why would feminine and brutal not belong in the same sentence? I can be feminine and still handle myself with grace and hands.
@@123smartiesI'm sorry, but in life, a woman's gotta be extreme at times. If she's just soft and feminine in specific situations, lifes gonna eat her up
Sadia you seem to be such a beautiful human being, inside and out. Thank you for making this content and for making an emphasis about the importance of bridging the gap between men and women. Much love
If your man is a narcissist, telling him your needs he will us them against you. I always told my ex, but he would exploit it and cause me pain. This tip of communicating a need works with a normal man.
Yes, at my workplace, people say.. I am too good,too, carrying to kind,too nice.., I can hear people think I am weak because of this....I can't change, and I won't ......maybe I just have to have more boundaries...
Wow u definitely good Sadia beta. I am a grandmother and our generation was definitely very different from todays. We were patient loving caring and very considerate and made life changing compromises!!! ❤
I love Sadia! I’m a teacher too, but sadly even when I was in middle school I saw so many girls talk like men(curse) and physically fight with other females. Femininity is not weakness ❤
Femininity is a social construct. Even in nature females fight each other. To say women shouldn't curse or fight just because of biology is foolish. Women have feelings and we're not perfect. I think it's unfair males get to make mistakes and we brand it as boys will be boys, but we act as if girls have to be perfect all the time. Then considering how hard men have made this society not showing assertiveness will place you at a disadvantage. In some cases what femininity has been packaged as has put women at a disadvantage and in some very dangerous situations too.
You’re right, “femininity is not a weakness”, but society thinks it is. Consider the phrase, “don’t be a p*ssy!” that a lot men use against each other-since that word is used to name a part of the female anatomy, I think that translates to don’t be a female/weak/woman.
And what about men who reject all of these traits- they dont want to give so you can’t receive , they dont want you to be helpless so you have to help yourself, and they dont even want you to cook or clean because they can do it themselves. A lot of men are setting up women to be more masculine because they are rejecting traditional responsibility over their partner and dont want the stress. We blame female empowerment but there’s a lot of disempowerment from men
@@happilydivorced3235 i know, such a weird thing for a man to want. And i can't believe that there are people who would actually NOT want an adult man who can fend for themselves, instead actively seek out a man-child 😂😂
There is something unique about Sadia when she speaks. It feels like she is the peoples emotions. She is able to articulate exactly what our needs and emotions try to tell us.
No she’s not. She told me I should be hit harder. She is not the peoples emotions. She has no credentials. She publicly condoned domestic violence in her very public comments
As I raised myself and become a strong woman, i forgot to be feminine. And it has a huge impact to my relationships. I didnt realized that until I listened to podcasts about how to be feminine. And it is for us ourselves as a woman, not actually for others/ partners.
Femininity, to me, is stepping into the fullest expression of yourself. That's subjective. ❤ I think there's some confusion among others as we embrace our natural self and identities because from the outside, it may seem more masculine for some. For me, I'm hyper feminine. For others, their truest self may not.
I agree. Well I agree with some of the energy that comes from the likes of just pearly, it comes off as being rather misogynistic compared to this energy.
@@happilydivorced3235codependency isn’t toxic, but is labeled as such in todays world and since the 60/s 70/s. This label is now assigned to people who are together but don’t want to be and who don’t understand their role in a relationship.
I strive to be a traditional woman. I want to be confident and secure in myself enough to just receive like how you are saying. I always feel like a burden and am predominantly unable to receive from others. I'm terrified of hipotheticly, let's say someone I love feeling like I just want to use them. Guys, offer me help all the time, but I fight it. I think it has hurt their feelings. I'm going to try to be more open tword help. It's one of the most difficult things for me. I don't think it's hard because of my pride, I think it's difficult because I'm scared. It's so confusing.
Pay attention to your childhood time, since everything stems from that time. If you were made feel guilty if you can't do something or you are not willing since it doesn't make sense for you, you will have problems with setting boundaries later. If you were rejected or unheard you will have problems with asking for help. Boundaries and help is what I learn now
Communication is key for all relationships to last.. don't expect everyone or anybody to know whats on your mind. It builds you your needs boundaries your worth.
What you really meant was this: "I would love to date a woman like her". And that's great. It's normal and healthy. What's not normal and not healthy is telling half of the population of the world that they should try and imitate a woman you fancy.
Did she give an example of how to communicate needs without sounding needy or critical? Men tend to not like being criticized and do the opposite of what told.
Instead of “You never get me flowers” say “Babe I love flowers, I would love to receive some soon” hope that helps (i always communicate my needs and desires using “I” sentences)
This is the why people are stuck in illusions. Energy is energy and we are whom we are. Even when we are female to be balanced means we also have masculine energy for we came from male and female. In different experiences and times we draw more so on other energies than others and other times we become more of one than the other but we are both. We don’t need to be taught what is “feminine” by society’s ideals nor another person, for we are all unique. Be you, by whom you were meant to be, not whom others tell you or want to box you in as.
FFS who needs advice on how to be feminine? For centuries women have been told what to do and how to be, mainly to fit the expectations of the more dominant part of society. I want to have the right to be me. Whether you like it or not, whether you find it sexually appealing or not. It's not my problem, because I don't exist to please you.
Something I struggle with in my femininity is being assertive. I tend to try to keep it classy and not stoop to someones level but I find that after the fact I feel frustrated because it feels like in a way I've allowed someone to step on my character and demean my power. How do you manage to remain graceful but also enforce boundaries?
Masculine energy is giving and feminine energy is receiving. Unfortunately, a lot of women, myself included were/are stuck on the idea we need to learn how to do it all so we do not rely on a man. It is then taken to the extreme and makes you impenetrable when a man tries to give. We are human beings and human connection is crucial for us to thrive so let's stop pushing either other way and live in a better balance of masculine and feminine energy. :)
I learned to reject my femininity because the men in my life acted like it was stupid. Especially in sexuality where because of my looks people feel like I’m playing a part that only women that look like the woman in this video are worthy of having. It is sad that she is also expected to be something else also. It is difficult to find a man that isn’t looking for someone to be his mom, boyfriend or gold-digger (it’s easier to throw money at someone than to love them).
A lot of men are as manipulative as women and even bitchier - bad women have taught men how to treat them in modern times. Men don't want to lose their money in a divorce today so they don't marry and some even get the snip so they can't be done for child maintenance. We live in different times. Best solution, "do you", be the best version of you and don't go looking for something in someone else, make sure you're that something that is missing.
But men here in the west don't like to offer much and are more inclined to 50-50% in everything. Even my brothers are trying to transform me in a man(i have 3). When I asked the one that I'm closer to, to spend more often some time together, he told me that once a month if even that it's possible, it's enough, "as we are grown ups and not children anymore". When i had an abusive encounter with someone and i cried about to one of my brothers, he told me to tough in up and to not get so easily scared. and so many other examples. So i always struggled to ask for help, and anything related to a need of mine including the emotional ones, because that's making me feel needy and a burden. Confused about accepting the idea that men need our feminity or which parts of it??
Glad I watched this clip. Dating again now in my 40s I know that I do want a feminine woman. But I’ve been on many dates where women ask me what that means. I found it odd that I would have to explain it, but then realized I really don’t know what it means either.
Another way you could communicate that desire is by saying something like, “I would like to provide a safe and secure environment for you to let go and flow in your soft feminine essence.”
@@Meltyfairy Very well said. Most women enjoy being feminine, but femininity is often a response to the environment, not a default position. It cannot be, because we live in a world that doesn't encourage femininity.
Who would you rather date? A woman who comes with a list of traits that she's expecting you to fit into? Or someone who says something along these lines: I am interested in getting to know you. I am looking forward to discovering your own unique strengths and I am prepared to value, cherish and respect you for what you as an individual have to offer. I have a feeling you wouldn't want to be treated and examined like a car that your date is thinking of buying. Don't be that kind of person, it's a massive turn off.
But why is she single if she has such great advice? Then it is very hard for her to find her soulmate just as she describes by the end? About not compromising?
so to be feminine i gotta accept but when i do that im a gold digger and the reading minds things…. she literally just said being nurturing is knowing what someone needs before they tell me, (ie. without someone communicating to me whatever they need), so of course as women we expect our partner to know what we need without us having to say it… if we have to figure it out for men why shouldn’t or can’t they figure it out for us?
I agree with her so much. I love being feminine. I have never agreed with society telling women so many things I don’t agree with. And I feel like I am very happy with that and see a lot of friends trying to fight against this belief that are not happy at all. So true love this woman. I hope a lot more listen to this. Happy Thursday everyone 🥰💃
I feel I've had to be masculine because I've lived my entire life on my own and had to do everything for myself. I don't necessarily 'choose' to be this way. Also, at age 50, I just got married over a month ago and I wouldn't say my husband is overly masculine, but certainly not feminine...hard to describe. He's just very quiet and gentle and I'm more loud and abrupt. Anyhow, he's turning out to be just as set in his ways as I am. 🤣 I think we both have a minor form of OCD, and I say that lightheartedly, not in a problematic way. But I grew up in a household where my mom did everything for my dad and he sat back and accepted it, because he felt he deserved it as he was the sole breadwinner in the family. Although my husband and I both work full-time at the same place of employment, I seem to have inherited the mentality that I need to come home and do everything for him. I quite enjoy looking after him, but I don't want that to change or me to resent doing it all. I think it's difficult when you start a relationship that way, to change it later on. My husband will do anything I ask of him, but is it odd to have to ask and that he doesn't just automatically see what needs to be done? I feel stupid asking and my friends would probably laugh at me because I should know better at my age, but I didn't grow up with brothers, had no male friends when I was younger and only one short term boyfriend before my husband and I got married after dating for 15 months.
I totally understand some of these concepts. However in today's world whenever women live by these ways, it's seen as being needy, people judge you because you set boundaries and communication has become an issue.
Hi guys for all my exclusive content, and the ability to ask me any question see my patreon
www.patreon.com/Sadiapsychology
One to one sessions see link in bio
If I ever get the opportunity to meet you in person, I'll be honoured!
Who is the interviewer?
Femininity:
1 - Accepting; receiving: YOU ARE THE DIVINE FEMININE. YOU ARE THE QUEEN.
2 - Communicating your needs. Speaking Up. RADICAL HONESTY.
3 - Choosing a partner who wants the same Life objectives/values...
If you're avoidant,
you most likely have said to family members
- who had a major role in your childhood:
"You only accepted me or liked me
when I was happy/obedient/emotionless."
This one simple statement fits with ALL
the core symptoms
of avoidant attachment:
1. Being overly self-reliant
(and in doing so, you hide your needs, emotions, problems, and acute illnesses)
2. Pushing down anger until it explodes
and manufactures the boundaries you crave
but can't always ask for
3. Not wanting to burden others with your problems
4. Wanting to fix your own issues to avoid looking incompetent
or even getting bullied and teased/mocked
5. Numbing out emotions with self-soothing behaviors
that are either totally unhealthy or pseudo-healthy
(like getting addicted to working out and healthy eating)
Remember ALWAYS
this process is all about YOU!!!
Not him.
He is just a catalyst.
Consider,
he may be your twin flame.
Look into that.
After he initiated your trauma,
you're now left to deal with
and to heal: all that has come to the surface.
GOOD! This is a blessing.
Albeit painful.
A necessary blessing, nonetheless.
HUGE-HUGE gift!
Major advice!!!
Listen closely!!!
NEVER ever
CHASE HIM.
He will run further
and you will lose yourself more.
You are the feminine.
You are the divine goddess.
You just be
and approve (or disapprove)
whoever comes along.
It's a yes: you meet my requirements,
or: it's a no,
you do not.
Be clear
on whom you're accepting as a partner
and DO NOT settle for less
(or you just delay what's meant for you).
Accept your struggle, anxiety, fear, sadness. Whatever comes up.
It's all human, and in need of your attention.
If you push it away, block it, or run from it...
You will just have to deal with it later...
1) Put yourself first and foremost!
2) Fall in love with yourself. Be your own dream girl.
Glow up and level up. Be the best version of yourself.
3) Rejection is redirection. Embrace the energies of miraculous possibilities.
And,
Any time you have a painful thought/memory/flashback/worry/belief:
1. Find the belief...
2. Write 11 DISADVANTAGES to having the belief
3. Write 11 ADVANTAGES to having the belief
If you can NOT find advantages
then that’s EXACTLY why you're stuck!!
When you finally see both sides...
Your mind will STOP thinking about it
'cause your brain will be rewired.
So you gotta keep at it,
until you find the positive
to the negative...
And therefore, ultimately
rewire your brain!
AND REMEMBER:
STOP making it all about manifestation
when really, it's actually all about VIBRATION!
If you haven't heard today...
You are so very loved
and you are so very worthy
of love.
The hardest part
is learning to love yourself
and to know: it's not all your fault,
and to see: that you're beautiful;
wonderfully perfectly
brilliantly created.
You're stronger than most;
a true leader/warrior in the making.
Keep going
and keep thanking.
Remember Jesus was an outcast
and he suffered more
than any human being
could ever endure...
And the most important message here is to forgive them
and to forgive yourself
and to love all.
Keep walking in truth.
One of the great poems of the Zen tradition
ends with this description of the awakened state:
“To be without suffering over imperfection(s).”
AFFIRMATIVE PRAYER:
I am one with the Divine.
I experience, peace, BLISS, love, and joy:
CONSTANTLY AND CONSISTENTLY.
I experience everything as grace AND AS LOVE.
I am at peace. I honor the Divine within me.
How To Be more feminine :
1- Start accepting, recieving.
2- Comunicating our needs. Speaking Up.
3- Choising a partner who wants the same Life objectifs (starting a family or not …etc)
2. is Nurturing and 3 is Boundaries. Communicating our needs was an answer to what mistakes do you think most women make
difficult to receive when uve had to sleep with someone twice against your will because you were charged with being the house-sitter, without being asked, so thought it your duty to protect the family furniture, fittings etc, but then suffered awful social degradation, including from same ppl who volunteered you to be surrogate parent and 'sitter', and psychological pain, as a result.
@@draftcomment2comment232 Sleeping with someone against your will has nothing to do with receiving. It's called rape, and it's a crime. It's absolutely normal to feel psychological pain after such an experience, I hope you can find help, and if possible, report the offender to the police.
@draftcomment2comment232 In the most kind way, I hope that you consider talking to the police and a therapist (if you're not already) vs the internet.
Someone forcing you to sleep with them against your will is a crime, and there's not much that we here in the internet comments can do.
All the best to you and your healing. 💛🙏🏾
Thats not being feminine. Those things are common sense regardless of gender. Being feminine is the opposite of being masculine. But a woman that knows how to kick ass can still be very much feminine.
1. Start receiving
2. Be nurturing
3. Boundaries
I have always thought nurturing is a masculine😮
@@lwendobanda2986provide n nurtured are 2 different things
@@lwendobanda2986 You're right. Nurturing and boundaries are both masculine :)
@@pepepo4432 Feminine too.
I love it how she is beautifull and intelligent, but doesn't act arrogant en still comes off as very humble giving great advice.
It’s all a act and I see through it
@@AmyMohamed355Maybe,you can act better!!!
@@AmyMohamed355exactly
In some other interviews she has actually openly admitted she has self-confidence issues and is frequently self-deprecating to sort of pre-emptively appease an expected aggression she has experienced most of her professional life.
Which to me is quite heart-breaking because she is very intelligent and well spoken. But apparently in her field if you are those things but ALSO choose to express yourself in an attractive and ladylike way, everyone just automatically assumes you're a bimbo or a slut or whatever. And would frequently treat her very disrespectfully.
So she developed mechanisms to work around that and make herself more likeable, but I think it came at the cost of some pretty deep internal self esteem.
She's not faking being nice. She's faking NOT being insecure.
And thats a sad thing for anyone to have to do. And worse when there's literally NOTHING for her to be insecure about but she still feels that way because of years of abusive treatment...
She is pro sharia law and its beautiful . She is perfect marriage material . Longevity for sure
I understand on the surviving mode, and being tired. I was with a feminine man before, and he doesn’t like to make decisions and take the lead. I ended up leading on everything. In the end, I got exhausted, and we broke up.
Being with a masculine partner now, and I let him lead (He is happy to lead), and I am so peaceful and happy. When I don’t have to think of our next step all the time, I have sometime to think about the next step for myself. ❤️
I like Sadia because she mentions that she has made the same mistakes too. She is relatable and not pretending she gets it right all the time herself ❤
Sadia truly keeps it 100% real . 👏🏽
Love your encouragment to hold true for what you need and your value. So many people sacrifice and drop their standards because they feel starved of love. Keep reinforcing your own self worth and your own self love and don't accept crumbs !! xx
I once saw a quote on FB. It said "Women are not here to do what men can do, we are here to do what men can't do." I thought that was interesting. It seems the concepts of masculinity and femininity have both become very twisted and tied up into a Gordian knot in our culture. It has become very difficult to unravel. This could become a very long post but I will try and be concise. Somewhere along the line women were brainwashed into thinking that nurturing was analogous to being subservient or servile which was somehow seen as "less than." Of course there are many things that men and women can BOTH do, but I think the point of the quote was thought provoking. Men have really been painted into a corner too. Many of the inherently masculine characteristics are now being termed "toxic." Certainly the negative interpretations of this may be true, particularly for men themselves. If you haven't read it, I recommend The Hazards of Being Male. The positive manifestations of masculinity and femininity both should be embraced, encouraged and celebrated. I think the beginning of the problem started with the assumption of gender roles being the ONLY choice for men and women and that they had to be very rigid and were used to force people into molds that were not natural to them but were promoted as being the only acceptable societal choice. Many people are quite happy in embracing traditional gender roles as delineated in Western society. Not everyone is, and we all need to find (or make) our own place in the world. When certain psychological characteristics were determined to be masculine or feminine, it caused a divide. We all have both kinds of characteristics to a greater or lesser degree. I am pretty much a tomboy but loving and nurturing people and animals comes very naturally to me and I embrace it as the best part of myself. I became a caregiver, nursing assistant and mental health therapy tech. I love the part about anticipating needs - very important in both personal and business relationships. Customers like to feel nurtured and cared for too.
One comment on the pleasure part mentioned in this video. Pleasure is not the same as happiness. Dr.Robert Lustig's Pleasure vs Happiness videos are wonderful and say it much better than I can- long versions and short versions both available on CZcams.
Excellent
I think conservative religion, any conservative religion, has played a big part in making the roles very rigid with women on the losing end. As for masculine traits, those labeled toxic are the ones that insecure, emotionally troubled, or narcissistic men use such as being domineering and putting down women and wanting to control them.
Here's the secret; men and women have both qualities, although some shade more into one or the other. I'm so sick of binary thinking on this subject.
Yeap, people have attacked my femininity too and so that's when I realized my femininity is a gift but being kind to others is free
Party girl looking for "love"
Thank you for adding such high value to what a woman/lady should be like.👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
I have both energy ,I am brutally feminine soft woman ,I can go from one extreme to another in a second! I know my power ! Depends on the situation and work I’m doing
@Silvanasilva-oy1mj brutal and feminine don't even belong in the same sentence.
Den u r a bi
@123smarties Have you ever seen a bear protecting her cub? Now, if the Bible warns you that there is no comparison between said bear and a woman scorned, why would feminine and brutal not belong in the same sentence? I can be feminine and still handle myself with grace and hands.
@@123smartiesI'm sorry, but in life, a woman's gotta be extreme at times. If she's just soft and feminine in specific situations, lifes gonna eat her up
Sadia you seem to be such a beautiful human being, inside and out. Thank you for making this content and for making an emphasis about the importance of bridging the gap between men and women. Much love
If your man is a narcissist, telling him your needs he will us them against you.
I always told my ex, but he would exploit it and cause me pain.
This tip of communicating a need works with a normal man.
Thank you Sadie! So enjoy your grounded sound wisdom!!!🙏💕✨🥰
Yes, at my workplace, people say.. I am too good,too, carrying to kind,too nice.., I can hear people think I am weak because of this....I can't change, and I won't ......maybe I just have to have more boundaries...
Wow u definitely good Sadia beta. I am a grandmother and our generation was definitely very different from todays. We were patient loving caring and very considerate and made life changing compromises!!! ❤
Woww I like the last line"what comes quickly, goes quickly" very right....Good and genuine things takes time to build....✌
So glad to hear your voice in this world.
Thank you so much for your contribution for all of us ❤
Femininity has has been a topic of interest and discussion for the past 10 years or so.Many useful guidance out there.
Receive, Nurture, Boundaries ❤❤❤
Thank you fellow feminine goddess for the beautiful reminder ✨🤍✨🦋💫🤍✨
She is spot on. From start to finish. I could identify with so much of what she said. The real HVW❤
I love Sadia! I’m a teacher too, but sadly even when I was in middle school I saw so many girls talk like men(curse) and physically fight with other females. Femininity is not weakness ❤
Femininity is a social construct. Even in nature females fight each other. To say women shouldn't curse or fight just because of biology is foolish. Women have feelings and we're not perfect. I think it's unfair males get to make mistakes and we brand it as boys will be boys, but we act as if girls have to be perfect all the time. Then considering how hard men have made this society not showing assertiveness will place you at a disadvantage. In some cases what femininity has been packaged as has put women at a disadvantage and in some very dangerous situations too.
You’re right, “femininity is not a weakness”, but society thinks it is. Consider the phrase, “don’t be a p*ssy!” that a lot men use against each other-since that word is used to name a part of the female anatomy, I think that translates to don’t be a female/weak/woman.
She condones domestic violence. Be careful who you take advice from
@@Bbytellewhat do you mean? When/where did she condone DV?
She supports Hamas and won't condemn beheading babies and burning children alive.
I aspire to keep my calm and cool like Sadia around difficult and controversial ppl! Love you mamas!!
The advice to stay true to who you are and what you desire 🥰
I needed this as a young girl becoming more feminine 🤍🤍 Thank you so much ☺️
My wife is the wholesome type. I love her. I live far away from Dubai.
Thank you I real needed to hear this ❤
For me, receiving and speaking up have been transformative steps on my path to true femininity. It's like a sacred dance of self-discovery. 💖
Thanks for sharing the truth, will pass this on, stay blessed and keep shining! Let's go! 👩👩👧👦👩👩👧👦👩👩👧👦👩👩👧👦👩👩👧👦👩👩👧👦
And what about men who reject all of these traits- they dont want to give so you can’t receive , they dont want you to be helpless so you have to help yourself, and they dont even want you to cook or clean because they can do it themselves. A lot of men are setting up women to be more masculine because they are rejecting traditional responsibility over their partner and dont want the stress. We blame female empowerment but there’s a lot of disempowerment from men
Leave those men and find the one who provides and protects !! Trust that men like this exist and you just need to level up while choosing !!
Find a real men
Why would you want to be with a man who wants you to be helpless?
@@minervarose7664Good question. It’s sounds like she had a man who believes in equality and didn’t know what to do with him.
@@happilydivorced3235 i know, such a weird thing for a man to want. And i can't believe that there are people who would actually NOT want an adult man who can fend for themselves, instead actively seek out a man-child 😂😂
Fantastic!
Thank you for sharing your wisdom.
X
I’ve been listening to her since forever! She is amazing!
What a pleasure for my mind to listen to Sadia! ❤❤❤
I love being feminine 💐✨
Saaaaaaaaaaammmme
thank you sadia❤ learnt a lot from ya
There is something unique about Sadia when she speaks. It feels like she is the peoples emotions. She is able to articulate exactly what our needs and emotions try to tell us.
No she’s not. She told me I should be hit harder. She is not the peoples emotions. She has no credentials. She publicly condoned domestic violence in her very public comments
You're in perfect alignment with Nature!❤❤❤
As I raised myself and become a strong woman, i forgot to be feminine. And it has a huge impact to my relationships. I didnt realized that until I listened to podcasts about how to be feminine. And it is for us ourselves as a woman, not actually for others/ partners.
Uh so what are u doing about it?
Am in this too. Some men think am a strong woman. Circumstances have taught me to up my game coz am the captain of my own ship
Everyone needs to watch this. She has nailed.❤
She’s amazing. So eloquently spoken
I needed to hear this❤
Not so much codependency as interdependence.
Agree with this perspective. It took a lot of life to learn and relax into this.
I love listening to her , so so wise and real and beautiful ❤
Amazing. I wish more women would listen to videos like this and learn
Good luck with that one 😅
They’re all damaged. Too late
@@dreday77764 Who damaged women? 😂
@natashadickson4819 they did themselves due to poor decision’s. Accountability 101
I wish more men went off to war and never came back
Femininity, to me, is stepping into the fullest expression of yourself. That's subjective. ❤ I think there's some confusion among others as we embrace our natural self and identities because from the outside, it may seem more masculine for some. For me, I'm hyper feminine. For others, their truest self may not.
Is it just me or does justpearlythings seem so masculine compared to Sadia?
100%
I think they're both feminine, maybe just in their unique ways :)
@@Kosiso-by1mcpearl ain’t feminine
Pearl looks a bit like a man
I agree. Well I agree with some of the energy that comes from the likes of just pearly, it comes off as being rather misogynistic compared to this energy.
Not co-dependency, but inter-dependency.
I got that too. Co-dependency is a toxic trait.
@@happilydivorced3235codependency isn’t toxic, but is labeled as such in todays world and since the 60/s 70/s. This label is now assigned to people who are together but don’t want to be and who don’t understand their role in a relationship.
I'm really glad I stumbled upon thus video.
I strive to be a traditional woman. I want to be confident and secure in myself enough to just receive like how you are saying. I always feel like a burden and am predominantly unable to receive from others. I'm terrified of hipotheticly, let's say someone I love feeling like I just want to use them. Guys, offer me help all the time, but I fight it. I think it has hurt their feelings. I'm going to try to be more open tword help. It's one of the most difficult things for me. I don't think it's hard because of my pride, I think it's difficult because I'm scared. It's so confusing.
That last part!!! It’s lonely, it’s hard, but I’m staying the course
Thank you for sharing your knowledge ❤😊 may Allah bless you more and more
Is she muslim?
ما شاء الله عليك ❤ بالصحة و الراحة
This was very helpful thank you ❤
I needed this
This was helpful thanks
Pay attention to your childhood time, since everything stems from that time. If you were made feel guilty if you can't do something or you are not willing since it doesn't make sense for you, you will have problems with setting boundaries later. If you were rejected or unheard you will have problems with asking for help. Boundaries and help is what I learn now
Communication is key for all relationships to last.. don't expect everyone or anybody to know whats on your mind. It builds you your needs boundaries your worth.
She is who a real high value woman is! Ladies learn from the best, Sadia….
Please stop telling women what to do.
@@SaraCaspianamen
As long as you know that like everyone else, you are entitled to your opinion.....
What you really meant was this: "I would love to date a woman like her". And that's great. It's normal and healthy. What's not normal and not healthy is telling half of the population of the world that they should try and imitate a woman you fancy.
@sara Please stop telling other women what they can and cannot say.
Did she give an example of how to communicate needs without sounding needy or critical? Men tend to not like being criticized and do the opposite of what told.
Instead of “You never get me flowers” say “Babe I love flowers, I would love to receive some soon”
hope that helps (i always communicate my needs and desires using “I” sentences)
@@user-zi3vy3nq3r
She should just get her own flowers
@@user-zi3vy3nq3r❤❤❤yesss I changed this phrase with my guy too and it’s more respectful
Instant subscriber 🙏🏽❤
Agree! Sadia is beautiful inside out❤
Lovely I really enjoyed your advice dayly I'm loving it ❤❤❤❤❤
Well said! 👏
Thank you for saying Inshallah at the end :)
🎉Thank Q for The Polishing and Comfort, The World Needs U🎉😊
Fighting with this everyday I just want to love n be loved rightfully
I love this .
This is the why people are stuck in illusions. Energy is energy and we are whom we are. Even when we are female to be balanced means we also have masculine energy for we came from male and female. In different experiences and times we draw more so on other energies than others and other times we become more of one than the other but we are both. We don’t need to be taught what is “feminine” by society’s ideals nor another person, for we are all unique. Be you, by whom you were meant to be, not whom others tell you or want to box you in as.
FFS who needs advice on how to be feminine? For centuries women have been told what to do and how to be, mainly to fit the expectations of the more dominant part of society.
I want to have the right to be me. Whether you like it or not, whether you find it sexually appealing or not. It's not my problem, because I don't exist to please you.
Something I struggle with in my femininity is being assertive. I tend to try to keep it classy and not stoop to someones level but I find that after the fact I feel frustrated because it feels like in a way I've allowed someone to step on my character and demean my power. How do you manage to remain graceful but also enforce boundaries?
Finally.... someon spoke
I totally agree with you
So gorgeous and modest which makes her an even rarer jewel🌹
Initiating is creating for yourself .
It's self.satisfying.
Waiting for others to give to you is a position of vulnerability and disempowerment
Sadia, I love your advice and videos. Who out there has similar videos for men?? I’m asking out of concern for a friend
Masculine energy is giving and feminine energy is receiving. Unfortunately, a lot of women, myself included were/are stuck on the idea we need to learn how to do it all so we do not rely on a man. It is then taken to the extreme and makes you impenetrable when a man tries to give. We are human beings and human connection is crucial for us to thrive so let's stop pushing either other way and live in a better balance of masculine and feminine energy. :)
We are all unique and what may work for one person may be destructive for another person. Balance is the key. And be aware of codependency.
Sadia is beautiful, intelligent and a wonderful psychologist.
Thank you ❤
I learned alot
People are actually replacing peace with pleasure
I learned to reject my femininity because the men in my life acted like it was stupid.
Especially in sexuality where because of my looks people feel like I’m playing a part that only women that look like the woman in this video are worthy of having.
It is sad that she is also expected to be something else also.
It is difficult to find a man that isn’t looking for someone to be his mom, boyfriend or gold-digger (it’s easier to throw money at someone than to love them).
A lot of men are as manipulative as women and even bitchier - bad women have taught men how to treat them in modern times. Men don't want to lose their money in a divorce today so they don't marry and some even get the snip so they can't be done for child maintenance.
We live in different times.
Best solution, "do you", be the best version of you and don't go looking for something in someone else, make sure you're that something that is missing.
Huh? Difficult to find a man who wants you to be his mom? How old of men are you dealing with?
But men here in the west don't like to offer much and are more inclined to 50-50% in everything. Even my brothers are trying to transform me in a man(i have 3). When I asked the one that I'm closer to, to spend more often some time together, he told me that once a month if even that it's possible, it's enough, "as we are grown ups and not children anymore".
When i had an abusive encounter with someone and i cried about to one of my brothers, he told me to tough in up and to not get so easily scared. and so many other examples.
So i always struggled to ask for help, and anything related to a need of mine including the emotional ones, because that's making me feel needy and a burden. Confused about accepting the idea that men need our feminity or which parts of it??
You need to find a husband to protect you.
Glad I watched this clip. Dating again now in my 40s I know that I do want a feminine woman. But I’ve been on many dates where women ask me what that means. I found it odd that I would have to explain it, but then realized I really don’t know what it means either.
Another way you could communicate that desire is by saying something like, “I would like to provide a safe and secure environment for you to let go and flow in your soft feminine essence.”
A lot of ladies have a protective shell that won’t come down until the environment is safe and under control by a strong male leader ❤
A woman can only be feminine if she's taken care of, financially. Something tells me Sadia here has never had to fend entirely for herself.
@@Meltyfairy Very well said. Most women enjoy being feminine, but femininity is often a response to the environment, not a default position. It cannot be, because we live in a world that doesn't encourage femininity.
Who would you rather date? A woman who comes with a list of traits that she's expecting you to fit into? Or someone who says something along these lines: I am interested in getting to know you. I am looking forward to discovering your own unique strengths and I am prepared to value, cherish and respect you for what you as an individual have to offer.
I have a feeling you wouldn't want to be treated and examined like a car that your date is thinking of buying. Don't be that kind of person, it's a massive turn off.
Spoken like a true feminine!
I grow up like her thinking that’s how all women were .
"unfortunately we are replacing peace with pleasure"
But why is she single if she has such great advice? Then it is very hard for her to find her soulmate just as she describes by the end? About not compromising?
Sadia you are so smart, beautiful and amazing
Thank you!
Are you familiar with David Deidas work? I believe you would appreciate how many books on masculinity and femininity.
so to be feminine i gotta accept but when i do that im a gold digger and the reading minds things…. she literally just said being nurturing is knowing what someone needs before they tell me, (ie. without someone communicating to me whatever they need), so of course as women we expect our partner to know what we need without us having to say it… if we have to figure it out for men why shouldn’t or can’t they figure it out for us?
I agree with her so much. I love being feminine. I have never agreed with society telling women so many things I don’t agree with. And I feel like I am very happy with that and see a lot of friends trying to fight against this belief that are not happy at all. So true love this woman. I hope a lot more listen to this. Happy Thursday everyone 🥰💃
That is really for me.
Exactly what Sheraseven tell us
Spot on sadia on dating in Dubai.
😃❤🙏🌿
Your narrative is intricate; akin to a book that was intricate and compelling. "Your Body Your Temple" by Various Authors
I feel I've had to be masculine because I've lived my entire life on my own and had to do everything for myself. I don't necessarily 'choose' to be this way. Also, at age 50, I just got married over a month ago and I wouldn't say my husband is overly masculine, but certainly not feminine...hard to describe. He's just very quiet and gentle and I'm more loud and abrupt. Anyhow, he's turning out to be just as set in his ways as I am. 🤣 I think we both have a minor form of OCD, and I say that lightheartedly, not in a problematic way. But I grew up in a household where my mom did everything for my dad and he sat back and accepted it, because he felt he deserved it as he was the sole breadwinner in the family. Although my husband and I both work full-time at the same place of employment, I seem to have inherited the mentality that I need to come home and do everything for him. I quite enjoy looking after him, but I don't want that to change or me to resent doing it all. I think it's difficult when you start a relationship that way, to change it later on. My husband will do anything I ask of him, but is it odd to have to ask and that he doesn't just automatically see what needs to be done? I feel stupid asking and my friends would probably laugh at me because I should know better at my age, but I didn't grow up with brothers, had no male friends when I was younger and only one short term boyfriend before my husband and I got married after dating for 15 months.
I totally understand some of these concepts. However in today's world whenever women live by these ways, it's seen as being needy, people judge you because you set boundaries and communication has become an issue.