Daddy Issues
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- čas přidán 4. 05. 2017
- We’re used to being rather mean about people who have ‘daddy issues’. We should be more careful and more kind. Daddy issues can lead to the worst kind of political situations - and need to be understood as psychological phenomena.
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FURTHER READING
“To say that someone has ‘daddy issues’ is a somewhat rude and humiliating way of alluding to a very understandable longing: for a father who is strong and wise, who is judicious, kind, perhaps at points tough, but always fair - and ultimately, always on our side. It would be so understandable if we were to feel we wanted someone like this in our lives, especially at moments of confusion and chaos…”
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im so jealous of people that have good dads.
Way too much
Same:((
Same dude :(
Me too ❤️
Me too
This video has spent more time with me than my dad.
Sounds the most realistic of all these comments, most dads work 8-12hrs a week and just want to do their own stuff (which is understandable and bad when you have a kid to bond with). Most of us are little surprises, basically unexpected so take it as you wish. One thing is certain you are already alive and here.
Same
SDSUMIGUEL big oof
Ouchhhhhh
Sad true. Literaly for me.
I learned that having an absent/emotionally distant father can psychologically force you to seek that fatherly love in your romantic relationships. Because where you lack that guidance, you will be in desperation to find it in other places. Finding them in the wrong places and by the wrong people will mess you up. It’s something most people have to go through in order to heal.
One of my exes seems to be like that. She went from relationship to relationship a few months at a time before she met me and we were together about a year. Her dad left not long after she was born and she seemed to have severe trust issues with men in general. She would either date men who would intentionally show no serious interest so the relationship broke off early, or she dated someone who was more serious and then stress out when things went on for too long and want to bail out.
oooooooh fuck this HIT ME HARD THIS MORNING
That's not really true. My father was an absent father an alcoholic and I had no interest to seek out 'fatherly love' in relationships . So cringe
@@wyleecoyotee4252 It depends on the individual and their environment. Not everyone with an absent parent will feel the same way but it no doubt still shapes who they grow to be, both for the better or for the worse.
@@wyleecoyotee4252 if it’s not true you wouldn’t be wondering through a CZcams video to see if you had daddy issues but thanks for coming to my Ted talk. Hope you learned something bud.
My Dad has an enlarged heart.
Don't worry guys he's okay. He went out and created two more families to fill it.
damn. hope ur ok
@@lostinthecosmos6095 thank you. I'm better after watching series like this one. It's really an eye opener and helps to understand my pathology.
❤️❤️❤️
😫😲 THAT was unexpected.
Bruh Moment
😬
I love how men use daddy issues as an insult to women when it's the fathers that completely failed
Edit: it's hilarious to see how people still try to blame women for a man's wrongdoings, yes there are mommy issues too but find me where I was denying that? If you actually cared you wouldn't only bring it up to counter and discredit the point I made.
Could be that the mother didn't give the father what they needed, or even told him to get lost. Goes both ways
@@thecurrentmoment if there's a mother like that their child has got mommy issues + daddy issues. if she was shitty to the father w out reason she was shitty to the child too. that's just parental issues. but generally its the father's fault from what i've heard. and experienced with my own 'father'
and vice versa too... women making fun of men for having mommy issues, well who do you think failed him... the most important woman in his life
Shouldn't be surprising since men compete and compare themselves with each other all the time. A man ridiculing a woman for her daddy issues in a way can be communicating subtly, "I could be a better dad than your dad!" Besides, it's not like any man has control over somebody else's father, let alone decades ago!
I love how women use mommy issues as an insult to men when it's the mothers that completely failed.
my dad went to a store to get milk once...
Oh dont worry he came back, he's just emotionally abusive now
Tnx for the laughs XD
well try both physically and emotionally abusive
Or you're a brat.
@@RC-fe9py or they're just shit parents? Lol?
@A D poor bastard🤣
i just wanna be hugged and be told everything is gonna be okay man. i want someone kind to hold me in his arms and tell me it'll be alright. :/
Shit, Jaden, Tyler just ghosted you again, it's gonna be ok 👍
Hey everything is going to be OK man :)
iam there for you ! ❤ don't worry
Same. You literally have no idea how fucking happy I was when I got a hug on my birthday😭
You’re kind aren’t ya? put yourself in your arms and tell yourself it’ll be alright
My highest wish is for a father figure to tell me that he is proud of me
Idk why but your comment has triggered uncontrollable crying in me
Same
@@uncrystallize3831 fucking SAME
Same
I'm proud of you!!
This video was more emotionally supportive than my dad.
Literally😔😓😪🤧😞
I know!
Same here
Yes.
Same
Me: is born
My dad: ight imma head out
😂😂😂
L😂L! Great sense of humor, Lauryn!
Same girl✌🏼😌✌🏼
Same here😂
Me too
"There are, in the end, no daddies."
Was so powerful to me because over the last year I've realized that balancing & tapping into both your feminine AND masculine energy is key. I have daddy issues but I don't long for that connection as much anymore because I've acknowledged & integrated my masculine side therefore I now realize that I'm "daddy" & "mommy" lol
You truly have to become whole within yourself. No one can fill the void for you. ✨
Yes. We have to re-parent ourselves in a way.
what the fuck. i never heard of that before. Tysm for this ima think about that forever
❤️
You got to become the man you always needed
Absolutely true 👍
God, how lucky I was. A high-level businessman who made it to my soccer games, was kind to everyone, and supplied a comfortable home full of laughter and love, while somehow conveying to us that not everyone was so fortunate.
@Levi James artist I´m so sorry to hear that...I hope, even if you can´t forgive him, that you can forgive yourself one day. You deserve it.
You were blessed indeed.
@Ian Butler Don’t make me cry. I’m very jealous
Do you need stepdad
So lucky.
My lack of parental love has resulted in me becoming more loving and wanting to give people a kind of love I never had.
Red Ballad I'm not clingy in the least lol, first thing my friends would say about me is about my level of independence. Not having adequate parents may result in some people becoming really needy and childish but I think it's developed the exact opposite traits in me. And I'm happy too😊
Same dude. Just remember that it won't always work out that way. I tend to get really sad and self-loathing when others don't accept or reciprocate the love that I try to give. It could hurt u rather than help them; remember some of that love u want to give should definitely go to u too
Love yourself like no other
The lack of parental love made me a depressed person on the outside, but a more nice, kind, and a pushover on the inside. But, my parents basically psychologically messed me up so I could be wrong.
the lack of parental love and my parents' preference to my sibling have led me to become a cruel person who dish out as much cruelty as I can. Consider it my hobby, lol
"We're so fragile, we could be killed by a moderately sized dog"
-School of Life 2017
thesphynx So... where do I need to apply pressure ? Please answer
D: - Me 2017
LOL me too!
lol I was the 2017th person to like this
So I read this exactly as he said it LMAO
I have issues with my father because I get contradicting signals.
He's always provided for me, will be there at the drop of the hat in an emergency, he does physical acts of love and care by doing things unquestionably, he's worked insane hours his whole life to try to provide for our family.
Simultaneously, he's short tempered - he has passive ways of talking to me like I'm an idiot. He always says "speak up, stop mumbling all the time" in an aggressive impatient tone, when I know I'm speaking clearly, I notice him zoning out and never paying attention to anything I say, he doubts everything I do, he has an air of constant aggression and control around him all the time. When he gets mad it's like a white hot fire in an immediate moment, his anger is unlike anything you'd ever experienced in a person - like the kind of anger where he could kill someone without thinking anything about it in that moment. He's like two completely different people in one body.
When I moved out he was easier to tolerate - I didn't have to deal with his day to day bad attitude, and saw more of his genuine good side.
But I was reminded the other day why I have such extreme issues with people pleasing/anxiety and tip toeing around others. He suddenly got severely angry about something (it was about watering plants he'd gifted me and my sister, although I have nothing to do with it it's my sisters responsibility but either way it's a fucking plant) and I noticed my internal panic peak quickly and felt like I was in the wrong and a total piece of shit, over such a trivial non issue.
It's very confusing to love someone and want to spend time with them, deeply desiring their approval, whilst simultaneously hating them and wishing they were dead.
If I ever have children I will NEVER ever be like that - I don't want to be this unpredictable ticking time bomb, and entity of confusion and uncertainty. I cannot pass on that anxious/self doubt trauma. Life is too short.
My father is the exact same, he's a good man who has severe anger issues
I'm terrified of him
I relate so much to this comment. I am going through a tough phase and reading your comment made me feel understood. Hugs!!
Feel really uncomfortable reading this comment
That's how I know I can relate to this
Relatable af
I feel this in my core my dad is amazing if I see him every once in awhile but living with him he’ll have a few weeks of being super happy than he will randomly be super upset and start searching for something to be mad about. That’s when he starts ignoring whoever he could find some dirt on. After a few months each year he would eventually snap out of nowhere over something that’s not that big most likely because he represses his anger instead of dealing with it in a healthy way.
I have very few childhood memories but here's one:
When I was 7, I was sitting on the sofa in the living room alone when my father entered through the backdoor. Towering over me, he said, "When your mother gets home, tell her I've gone." And that was that. Decades later, he explained he had to leave because my mother's never-ending rage was affecting his health. So, he just left, leaving his three sons behind to suffer the same rage. My mother was an extremely abusive woman. My father failed to protect his children. It's taken a half-century to begin to realize the impact both of them had on my brothers and me. This channel's videos are remarkable - thank you for them.
*Just forgive them.*
@@user-ry2qs7xf9k forgiving is difficult. We as humans are not emotionally strong until now to forgive people and move on. That "void" will enlarge. so by simply saying "forgive them" you aren't helping. Ideally it should be done but it can't us humans are not that powerful. The process of healing and understanding the underlying cause of abuse or any sort of trauma takes a long time. So please next time before you say "forgive them" you aren't helping anyone.
@@kinkami8165
Relationships are about being ready to change and sacrifice,this is the way the human self progresses and evoloves,if people don't realise this they will suffer and make people around them suffer,this is how it is and no one can change this
Forgiving someone is the highest form of sacrifice,if you're not ready to forgive then I'm sorry to say you're just like people who are hurting you.May God bring you peace
@@user-ry2qs7xf9k you know, nowadays therapists don’t usually push you to forgive your abuser.
Don't make this personal, Please do not make assumptions about me not being forgiving. Second to reach to the level of being forgiving of others it takes time to understand why the front person did what they did to hurt you, you can NOT forgive and still move on.
I don’t have daddy issues. My dad has issues that he wanted to make babies and then abandon them
@Krieger Poet , I live in Europe. White men do that shit, too.
@@harleen222 , I am so sorry
I understand that this statement might make us feel empowered, but I think we have to be honest with ourselves, we have daddy issues, we have this void that keeps attracting narcissistic men into our lives, so instead of working in ourselves to heal our wounded inner child, we bought the idea that all men are the same, all men are trash, and yes! all narcissistic men are the same, all narcissistic men are trash, but not all men. Toxic masculinity belongs only in narcissistic men. And if we keep attracting narcissistic men of course we are going to think that all men are the same, but not all men are narcissists.
@@harleen222 Yes of course, there are different Daddy issues, I agree with you, but I think it doesn't matter if you're Dad is a narcissist or he left you or he has a mental disorder or he died, because at the end of the day he is absent, it might be absent physically or emotionally but absent anyway. And we all have that void, so we don't have boundaries, we don't have standards because we want someone to fill that void, so who are the ones that benefit with us not having boundaries or standards? Narcissistic men. I'm not trying to win this argument or to say I am right and you are wrong. No! I just want all of us to be careful with narcissists (men and women) please go watch Meredith Miller's CZcams Channel, Narcissists are everywhere and we don't recognize them!! Ok this might sound stupid, but I'm going to say it anyway, so I'm a big fan of Frozen and I watched the movie many times, then this year I saw it again but the difference between this time and the others is Meredith Miller!! OMG the song between Anna and Hans is a red flag!!! All the song is a red flag!!! Of course Hans is going to be the bad guy!!! He is going to fast in the relationship, he is saying exactly what Anna wants to hear, he is sending Anna into the cold, into the wild to look for Elsa and he is safe and warm in the castle. And when Anna's horse came back alone and he "went" to save Anna, he didn't look for Anna at all!! He just came back with Elsa, you see?!! Red flag! Red flag! Red flag! And at the end he said that Anna was desperate for love (Daddy issues) and that she said yes so easy (no boundaries no standards). The first hundred times I watched the movie I didn't see any red flag, but now I think I saw each and every one of them. Please please go to Meredith's Channel, she only focus on Narcissists (men and women) not Daddy issues. Sorry for bad English!!
Krieger Poet Interesting that my dad is white and did that too.
Or irrevelant... 😉
Never say "A hunger for a daddy" again
LOLLLLLL
😂😂😂😂😂😂
😂
Lol, why ?
😂😂🤣🤣🤣
My father and I are not close. One of my worst fears is his outliving my mother.
me 2
Happened to me, well sucks
Me too
this is mine and my mother's fear. she is so scared that he will show his craziest side if it happens. want her to outlive so bad because I am too pretty for jail
How your parents play a major role in your life. God, I’m so jealous of people who have good dads :(
Time to delete my youtube history
Me too, I watched those explicit vids you can only watch if you're 18+
Queen Beast dont sit on my face gg, thats the one.
No fuckinn way 😂 I thought this SAME thing while clicking on the video
TypicalTuber I’ll be your daddy ;)
TypicalTuber 😂😂
"There are, in the end, no daddys"
Every gay man's fear upon entering the club
Dávid Danos looooiol
I wondered how far down I'd have to scroll before someone referenced gay daddies. Love 'em!!!
😂😂😂
XD
@Frizzurd shut up and come get you ass spanked son
My dad stoped talking to me when I was 12 after I learned that he was having another daughter. So on top of abandonment, I am dealing with issues about being replaced by men. So, I’ve finally decided to start working on my daddy issues (woo) but trying to help your inner child is hard!
I hope everyone watching this video will one day find the strength and courage to appropriately deal with their daddy issues (and potential momma issues).
My dad was always around but he acted tough and created an aura of fear around him. No matter what I did as a child, he never seem to be impressed. Growing up, I became an adult who would do anything to get someone to see me, appreciate me. I grew up believing I am not worthy of love. The only way someone would see me is if i gave them something in return. I thought, every relationship is conditional. I would try too hard for people and then they would find me clingy and leave me and resurface the wounds of abandonment. Its not always the father who leaves causes daddy issues, but also the father who was there but never emotionally.
Wow you exactly described me. This has made me a masochist in many ways and prevents me from forming stable relationships, I wish to attract men but I'm not really interested in anyone honestly :'(
Daddy issues doesn’t always mean your father was a terrible one growing up. My dad spent so much time working, he was never there for even the simplistic moments like to pick me up from school, or play with me outside, or help me with homework, teach me how to ride a bike or swim. It breaks my heart because I don’t want to blame him trying to keep our family from being homeless on my emotionally neglected child/teenage years. Maybe that’s why I always get so excited when my boyfriend picks me up to take me to simple places like running an errand, or pays extra attention to me and takes me to eat. Especially whenever he holds me, even the slightest touch of affection satisfies me. I think it’s because growing up I never got it from my dad and I can’t blame him for his bad parenting cause my grandpa was an alcoholic and he didn’t set a very good example.
Now my life is completely terrible because I am emotionally exhausted and can’t keep healthy relationships with ANYONE, including my family. I feel like im completely misunderstood. And now my dad isn’t proud of me because he found out I smoke weed. If anyone is still reading sorry I had to vent.. **edit** Wow I didn’t think so many people would read my comment and relate to me...it is very comforting to know
Anna Ess, that is what he had to do, BUT now YOU do what you have to do! If you need to smoke to keep yourself level, fucking do it. I can barely function if I don’t smoke, I will rip someone’s head off and shove it up their fucking ass. When things get tough, you take care of yourself, there is nobody else gonna do it (unfortunately).
I mean im not really much of a weed supporter myself, but I'm glad you could vent here and I hope ur life improves
@@zp6097 I feel like if someone can't function without getting high & are to the point they'd snap without being stoned, that's probably a sign they should see someone...?
Comparing the very first sentence to 2/3 of the way through, this response clearly is therapeutic for you. It might be worth seeing a therapist about out it or even just thanking him for working tirelessly for your family, telling your dad how you felt growing up, and seeing if he’s willing to work on building up the relationship between you two.
I agree that while there’s nothing wrong with weed, using it to function is a red flag. Don’t ignore your red flags (Been there done that). Nothing wrong with smoking recreationally but severe dependency on anything can just worsen everything.
oh wow i can relate to that My dad was so emotionally absent when a guy i was dating showed affection and attention and generous with me it was so astounding and overwhelming and even tiniest things were such big deal haha someone being nice to me was such an insane experience every time it happened
He just proved the whole world has daddy issues im shook
@Alex Schneider wut
@@DBeauty82 modern feminism who glorifies single mothers & telling them that they're strong independent women who needs no man so they can become welfare moms. The war on drugs fucked over minority fathers as well.
@@DBeauty82 it's feminism
@@DBeauty82 How are men supposed to overcome society (women) tellin them everyday that theyre not needed?
Uh... what happened to this conversation
I just want a father that loved me, no matter how flawed he was.
Ditto
As a child I always hoped my parents would finally split up so that I don´t have to see my aggressive alcoholic father any longer. A pity it never happened.
Same, dude. Same.
Same my mom isn't financially stable to get a divorce and now the household is just really toxic I want to get out of my house asap but I also love my mom and bro.
@@catinspace887 Don't worry there is hope! You guys have each other don't forget that. It can change
@@madeleinetremblay9315 thank you for this, it really means alot...hope everything turns out better for me
Never had a relationship with my father. He was around the whole time growing up but he had no interest in a relationship with me. I’ve never had conversations with him ever. I was terrified of him.
Really.. Me too my dad didn't really care if he ever saw me so longas I was around t I dunno just gum b there for him and do his bidding he didn't give a shit otherwise its cruel eh. Do u feel I dunno anyway its d most painful thing I don't trust me now or anybody really... Tis sore very painful I know
Same. My dad was there most of the time but never really cared about having a relationship with me. As I grew, I realized how lame and awkward our conversations were. Sometimes I wish I was never born if he had to be like this. It feels really lonely.
I’m sorry CK
Ill be your daddy girl.
@I AM Yes. true. But I dont like sheep. Thats why I can be your daddy.
daddy is-soos
is-yooz
is-u-s
Hhhhhh yeah ugh hated it, should be sh sound
@@samahamara8543 Strictly speaking, his way is the right way. But times change.
More like Daddy is Zeus, am I right?
Oh yeah, I have a problem. This video didn’t really touch on the “female relationships as an adult” side of this though. For the most part, the stereotype that girls who like older men have daddy issues, is true. I know it isn’t for *everyone,* but it’s a sign. In my life I’ve definitely found myself getting attached to older men who gave me feelings of encouragement, and gave me the feeling they appreciated me, or thought I was smart. When I was in high school I had a great English teacher who really appreciated my potential and my creative mind even though I was such a loser in school. He always made me feel like I mattered, and I didn’t have any romantic feelings for him but it honestly CRUSHED me when I felt like I might have disappointed him. Even though the stakes were never that high because I was just a student, but that’s what it felt like. Now that I’m 20, I find myself having an attachment to a guy ten years older than me at my work for the same reasons, making me feel appreciated, making me feel like he thinks good things of me, a closeness, a understanding, it’s especially deep this time because workspace relationships can end up becoming more personal you are at least given a chance of that, and I am about one step away from my final daddy issue transformation of needing to be sexually fulfilled and found desirable. I don’t like having so much emotional dependency on temporary people in my life who I feel I have a closeness with, because things that would be casual for everyone else end up feeling like crushing disappointments. I am always incredibly attracted to the idea of dating an older man and being financially secured, among other stupid fantasy stereotypes of a girl who wants a man to take care of them. Even though I’m a deeply independent person, the desire for this doesn’t stop.
I can relate to you. I would always want to make male teachers proud of me and felt deeply disappointed when they didn't care. I'm mature mentally but not emotionally. I realize how silly l am for wanting them to give me attention and love in some way, l can even cry when they are not kind to me. I'm not attracted to older men so much because l don't really trust them but I'm very attracted to more mature looks. My boyfriend looks much older than he is and l catch myself depending on him emotionally way too much at times. He understands but l wish l could be more mature, l always just act like l'm not so affected by daddy issues. I'm smart, l can think for myself and achieve things but l always want a man to be proud of me.
@@anna14campbell ain't that the truth, I feel the exact same way
@ thank you. I really should distance myself from him too, we have no future but he's a great guy. And he's a good friend. I've never loved someone the way I love him, since I wrote this comment I've completely fallen for him, in fact I've never loved anyone else until him. He so good to me, but I feel like he sees me as a child even though I'm 20. Idk what I'm going to do, being apart from him pains me but we are soon splitting ways. I know its for the best, what I feel is ultimately unhealthy because I need to find my self worth, its all just so hard. We've gotten closer, and I can't help but want more.
@ Perhaps its my anxiety saying these things, he might not see me as a child but I fear he does. I don't want him to. I didn't mention in my og comment that the man is actually my manager, who is technically one of my bosses, he trained me and everything. He stuck his neck out for me a lot. So I always fear my emotions are out of line to discus with him even tho we are rather close. Even if he does feel the same for me which I doubt, itd be quite the scandal. Btw thanks for discussing this with me
@ don't worry I don't think you're being pushy, my friends are telling me the same thing. I honestly probably should talk to him. Sometimes things that are hard to do are worthwhile. Honestly ill give you an update if any of this goes well 😂. I hope you find someone who makes you feel good about yourself and gives you the space you need to be your own person too
my dad gets mad if i say he hurts my feelings or i’m just straight up depressed bc he thinks i shouldn’t be sad if he’s providing for me (food, school etc). that’s not only a parents job, they should be their emotionally too
omg same
Imagine if at the end of the video the narrator just said,
“Now, does anybody want to be my daddy?”
Kirsten Allen hahahahahha
Or "does anyone want me to be their daddy?"
hahahaha
IM DYING LMAOO
Alain Bouton is obviously the all-daddy
..."go ahead and cry little girl"
Right
''Noone does it like you do''
Go ahead and cry little boy you know that you’re daddy did too
;-;
I KNOW THAT YOU'VE GOT DADDY ISSUES
My dad grew up an orphan, and grew up with a family that had him as a servant.. I don’t Blame him for anything now that I’m older I understand him more. I love him for everything he has done for us.
Give your Dad a kiss on the cheek from me in Australia. Tell him that I think he's a precious person. Tell him that he's precious to God.
I was put in a child's home for a while. I had my third birthday there.
I was shattered and depressed. I lost my ability to speak.
These things leave a deep imprint on us, and I have great love and understanding for others who've been in similar situations.
How did your family connect with the grandparents, or did you not connect at all?
❤ same kind of story
These comments have made me realise how good my dad actually is and that I’ve taken him for granted.I love you dad even past any negative experiences the positives outwash them!
❤️
“The adult longing for a father is not the result of having had a good father in childhood; it’s a consequence of abandonment.”
Wow, you don’t say.
I thought the same thing. Like, yeah, we all know that
@@practicalintuition4030 I didn't know.
sigh ;(
it may be obvious to you and out-of-the-ordinary knowledge to someone else
@@joeshabe yes thats true few words really hit hard they make sense for some people
Ultimately we have to become emotionally integrated and learn how to be the good dad to ourselves.
Lynn Larson ....well said , this it what a good dad would have helped let happen and occur naturally .
-build Self confidence and self esteem
-unconditional love
-guidance
-feel safe
-healthy attachment
-teach you to set boundaries for yourself and others
-feel free to chase your dreams
-live a productive,balanced life .
💕
Some of us have to learn to become emotionally integrated adults ,as adults on our own .....🙏🏻
Yes to that!
@@theliftexpert Good luck to us!!!💜💜 We can do this.
It can't work that way.
Looks in mirror: Oh, hello daddy
I envied my friends who had good fathers. No drunken behavior, no ruined holidays, no police at the door.
I think people often forget that men also can have daddy issues.
I could be a prime example of that my dad left before I was was born and I had a shitty step father.
I was made fun of for having those issues but since Im male Im expected to suck it up and dont show pain.
@nathan
As I watch these videos, I think about my father's experiences growing up.
He grew up in an emotional vacuum, and I can see why he was juicy prey for my Narcissist mother.
Her emotional responses were over the top all the time, and she was physically very attractive.
She was obnoxiously loud, the life of the party, but her sudden screaming rage-bomb detonation was.... I don't have words.
By the time I was born, he was trauma bonded to her, and in sustained devaluation.
He's a bit like Prince Harry, who's the brainwashed puppet of his controlling Narcissist wife. He scurries to placate her moods and her rage.
My brother has had a lot of issues to work through growing up in our family, as have I, so I totally understand your comment.
My brother told me one day that he suddenly realised he wasn't ever going to get approval from our dad, so he was going to stop trying to get it. No more jumping through hoops and metaphorically singing and dancing to elicit a response.
I came to the same decision shortly after that conversation.
Our fathers aren't able to give us what they don't have to give, what they weren't shown by others. It's natural for us to have a grieving process as we come to terms with that.
Yeah, a man needs a masculine role, or he will have problems, the same is with female. KIDS NEEDS a father, and a mother. I still don't know which is more crucial in the development of the infant, one would think at first thought that is the mother, but recently after searching about daddy issues and thinking in retrospective i don't know which. But let me tell you something i know for SURE. Daddy issues, while is bad in males, is devastating in women, depending on how all the situation went, they will develop different problems with different levels, the worst thing, is that THESE problems originated from their lack of a proper father in their childhood, will eventually develop MORE problems in them. And bro, i'm talking about serious serious problems nowadays. They crave for male attention, could develop fear of abandonment which lead them to make ANYTHING for their partners, they could have problems establishing boundaries or even respecting the boundaries of their partner. They would desire too a unhealthy need for touch (which happens too in men usually) but in them is worst, because women have naturally more options when it comes to relationships and partners, so they could become very very sexual persons. To satisfy their need for touch AND to deal with their fear of abandonment from their partners. The more of sexual partners and romantic relationships they had, the more their problem is for them, and the less likely they are to find and develop a good and healthy relationship with someone decent. Then, they are more likely to develop mental problems, a lot of women suffer from anxiety issues, BPD, and social anxiety. Eventually this in late adulthood will reach a bad bad point if it is not solved at time. Because believe it or not XD, women NEEDS to form a family, at least kids, but yeah, they are wired to need a partner in their lives, despite the stupid and dangerous things all those toxic feminism empowerment says. And all this is recently, because there are a lot of new things mostly derived from technology and consumerism that are making bad structures in family and thus the reason of these problems.
I know it will eventually all be better, but right now the society is suffering a lot of problems and few people are starting to understand.
@@pewpewcatto7105 thank you for this comment, I understood long ago that emotions are normal and its okay to feel pain. Im glad I also found someone who helped me with understanding that.
*The hunger for a daddy*
or a dick?
😂😂😂😂
you know I like it naughty naughty naughty- is that what your name is from? that song?
I *crave* it
Wtf is wrong with people. 🤦🏽♀️
Or to save you time, here's a Robin Williams quote to sum it all up
*_“It's a wonderful feeling when your father becomes not a god but a man to you -- when he comes down from the mountain and you see he's this man with weaknesses. And you love him as this whole being, not as a figurehead.”_* - Robin Williams
Rip robin😭
Robin Williams was a better father to me than my actual father
That’s the thing though I’ve always seen his weaknesses but not the helpful or guiding part of him
if i became a dad i would never inflict such pain and downfall to my offsprings, no matter what they are.
definitely, me too.
Bro said "offsprings" 💀
@@KrappyPatty-ry6lj burh wat u want to say? its just the same term, ur just shallow
🕳
@@firstrunnerup1675 They're called children, nothing sophisticated about using the word "offspring", nothing shallow about using the word children. You're just butthurt
I suffer from daddy issues. I blame myself, I don’t feel good enough, I’m not happy and lately been wishing I had a partner who could love n protect me.
I was like you and let me just say, please don’t depend on a partner to come and essentially “save the little you”. Work through any possible codependency issues if you have any present, I promise that the unfortunately irrational longing for a partner to subconsciously fulfill the tasks…will get smaller little by little.
@@tiffanyribbons so we just have to accept we won’t have a a father that makes me sad
@@zairefranklin122 yep. I hate it. I really do. But it gets easier to live with once you learn how to accept and cope with the way you feel. I just to be so angry...crying about how I'm never going to get what I want in this life...some good parents. ... And, as I accepted that I had gotten this far with little help from them, I could build a plentiful life for myself. Heck I'm smarter than the two of them combined. Emotionally intelligent, I'm resilient, and I'm kind, witty. And I'm not going to have children so I don't repeat any cycles. I can do it. And so can you. You did it with no help, no thanks to your dad. YOU did it. Now keep doing it. Be better...for you.
Fathers who don't affirm and lift up their kid, give them issues.
Same goes for mothers.
Exactly
The school of life is kink shaming us....
MrFuthisshit you deserve to be in shame
Laura Happy The video says otherwise
hahaha glad i'm not the only one thinking this
MrFuthisshit At the end they said to find a good Daddy who helps you & doesn't pretend to be perfect. This could be found in a healthy kink relationship.
lol that's what i was thinking
My father was very present during my childhood and early teenage years, and I owe him most of my interests, such as cinema or history, and my music taste. Our relationship started deteriorating when my parents divorced and especially when he started dating a woman much younger than him, who really wasn't ready to bear with adolescent me and my slightly younger brother. He got so blinded with her that I'd feel like he was abandoning us, his children, and putting her before us, which didn't make sense to me because we are his children. We used to argue a lot, because I was very hurt by that but he wouldn't understand, and I felt like he never actually listened to me : to me, it seemed like he was always trying to justify his behaviour and answer to whatever "accusations" I could make instead of simply listening. Last year I decided to leave his house because we were going to move in with his girlfriend and her two children. From that moment on, our relationship has been more broken than ever. There were some moments during which I missed him, I even tried to come back to him but to him my efforts were never good enough, there were times in which I didn't think of him. I wish we could just talk simply, but I know that I'm responsible for this situation as well.
Heartbreaking...maybe write s letter?
As a kid, I never trusted my father. He would beat me with such rage in his eyes, I thought he wanted me dead. I couldn't even hug him or express my love for anything without him making it into an issue. Every time I got overly excited about something he'd look at me like I was a disappointment. I couldn't understand what I had done wrong because he would beat me and not explain what I did wrong. It wasn't until years later I realized that he most likely beat me because I am gay and was girly back then (I grew up with a house of mostly girls and didn't have any guys to get my mannerism from). I soon learned to hide my true personality from the world - something I still do today.
Growing up, I hated him and to this day I don't have a real relationship with him. When I see great dads that empower their kids I get so jealous but I'm happy for them that they won't turn out like me - a broken man. I have so much trust issues with authority to the point that I consider them a threat first and they have to prove they are good.
I think it's our opportunity, now, to make new ways to be men. I grew up anchorless because of my father. Terrified of becoming like him, an angry man, insecure about his masculinity and too ashamed to show emotion or love. I guess the irony is, if I'd been the straight masculine son he wanted, I might have become just that. It might have taken being hurt by him to learn there was another way.
Maybe I'll adopt, and be some kid's father some day. I hope I'll be the kind of dad who can set a good example. I'll start by being myself, without shame.
Jesus christ
that's so sad
as a fellow gay man, I just want to say I'm so sorry for what you're going through. I'm 27 and actually going through hell right now because my family just recently found out I'm gay (and I did not come out -- I was found out, which made it so agonizingly stressful and traumatizing). you and I are very similar in that our fathers were the only male figures in our households (I too had no brothers, only 3 older sisters and my mother, all of whom were extremely overbearing). and even though my father was present and provided for us, he worked long hours and I barely ever saw him as a kid. and even in those rare instances when I did see him, he was not EMOTIONALLY present. my childhood memories of my father are basically summarized by the image of a giant potato sitting on the couch and snoring. of course, I consider myself lucky that he wasn't abusive. but my point here is, I wonder if the emotional aspects of our fathers (the rage of your father and the lack of emotion of mine) contributed to our sexuality somehow. like somehow we long for a father figure that we sought but never had -- one that was more expressive, authoritative, awe-inspiring, strong, etc. In my case in particular, I wonder if that combined with the overwhelming feminine (and emasculating) presence in my household compounded the effect. it's like a chicken/egg thing I guess, who knows. I'd love to hear a reply from you though about what you think of what I said. wish you all the best and happiness in the world :D
@@iluvbeef11 Oh boy, my same thoughts. 26 here. I've been looking for people that still held such view point.
My childhood was similar except the sisters part and the fact that mine was in his 60's, was strongly present in everything but I came to realise that he wasn't intimate and emotionally distant.
Seems like I'll never really know, I've spent week reading old research to get an answer but it was contridoctory.
However, I personaly believe it had something to do with how I turned to be.
One time I was on omegle and this guy started the conversation with: "I'm looking for a girl with a bad realationship with her father."
Pls WaLuigi Dom Me he fuckin knew
😂
wtf 😂
Sounds like he was taking lessons from Quagmire
Pls WaLuigi Dom Me tell them to look somewhere else.
My dad is still here but he left us and had his own family somewhere else, he has also had a massive temper and anger issues which can result in abusive behaviour however I want a father, not him , just someone who will actually be a father figure to me as I've never experienced that. My heart goes out there to anyone in the same position as I am in right now.
Lol he freed you. Aren’t you happy? I’d be happiest if my father did that. He’s a psychotic piece of shit anyway
The phrase good daddies broke my heart again, No daddies Made me smile, bittersweet
Crying over this.
Wow trauma really has fucked me up bad.
I totally feel you, i'm balling my eyes out watching this video and reading these comments. It hurts so damn much. Although he was most of the time around during my childhood, he wasn't with us with his whole heart. I feel numb. I really don't know what to do, i can't talk to anyone about this mess because it's just too messed up. However, i hope you're doing somewhat better
❤︎
@scsyc bxcvbx wtf
Same bro lmao went from watching good will hunting scenes to this
Sorry praying for you in Jesus name ❤️🙏🏽
the narrator of school of Life is daddy af.
casual freak Alain is definitely a daddy
Ugh please shut the fuck uuuup 😩
Hahaha
Nonononono
Ikr😭
My daddy issues made me want to protect, love and understand people in a way that my father never could, but it unfortunately gave me huge trust issues that sometimes make it harder to get closer to people. Anyways, thank you to The School of Life for another great video :)
learn to give the love you never got.
What would you give from an empty cup?
@@It.is.snehal I would give the cup, it's better than nothing
@@jaymeselliot8181 so you wanna give everything whatever is left with you that too for people? And wbu?
@@It.is.snehal love is free
“We secretly yearn for a man to step in and fulfill an **unquenched** fantasy role.” Thank you for that, SOL
*cough*
Aroace me: **fades into the rock we call earth**
this is me
Mmmmm hmmmmmmmmmmmm. How are the odds looking?
Yes... That sentence got my attention too. Very powerful.
I cried throughout this video. Jesus, this is all so true.
Time with your dad is something that if you havent got enough as a child is hard or overall impossible to get as an adult. You will look for it elsewhere, most probably in your partner, but some day they will leave, and you will be left alone in the middle of a big, sad world to fix all the damage your parents, even if not on purpose, had caused.
Thank you for making this.
I cried too, barely listening to most of the video the first time watching it. Glad to see I'm not the only one going through this.
I feel the same
Crying too
this comment made me tear up
Reading your comment makes me cry even more :(
im a gay male in my late 20s and I have always dated older men. Dad was never around. I had a step father but it just wasn't the same.. especially when my mother was the head of household and she always had the final say.
I’ve been physically, verbally, and emotionally abused as a child mainly by my dad, I’m turning 20 soon and it still haunts me to this day. He’s trying to fix the relationship we never had and I tried to roll with it but he ruined my life before it started and I’m just not comfortable acting like nothing happened.
When he said "a hunger for a daddy"
I CRACKED UPPP OMG I CANT TAKE ANYTHING SERIOUSLY
....
When humor is your only coping mechanism :)
SAME LOLLLLLLL
The same things that make you laugh, make you cry... I used to hear ppl say this growing
Noha M hahaha so funny
Hey at least your not icing your veins 🤷🏽♀️💯
YezYah GotMeOnSomeRealLifeShhh Yeah, at least instead of crying about the things that can make u cry, laughing about it is a positive way to react, plus we now know the great health benefits of laughter :)
Damn it! I don't know the capital of New Zealand. I'll never be able to be a good father.
Hi Jack it's Wellington, now go be a good dad !
Austin Deslongchamps Thanks dude, you changed my life
I laughed at this because I live in Wellington.
+Austin Deslongchamps Sam Leamy thx guys I would tell my child it's Auckland xD Idk why but I was somehow convinced that Auckland is a capital, not Wellington. But as I'm a girl I guess I just have to find myself a wise husband :D
Well Auckland does have a population of around four times that of Wellington, so I guess it's understandable that some may think that.
my father broke my shoulder cause i wanted to move out and get a job.now i have been in unimaginable pain for a year. im 22. stuck with a control freak manipulative and physical abuser.
:// how are you doing now?
While raising my kids. I did the opposite of what my father did. My father, while drunk would call and say, he wished I was his father. I would think, so do I..
"there are no daddies"
So the moral is: all this love and protection we crave and need cannot actually exist in reality.
That's depressing.
But as someone who relates to this video *way* too well than I should, it makes sense
Thank u. Such a good review.
In the end it's better to know the truth and knowing yourself, than to live your entire life in an illusion or fantasy.
What daddy represents externally is protection, confidence, giving, etc and you can still give those things to yourself internally. Look up how to reparent yourself. Because people who had healthy relationships learned healthy habits and also learned that feeling of stability and whatever other positive emotion they got from their father. For example if you grow up with a mother who constantly worries you’re probably gonna grow up with similar crappy coping strategies.
Love is chaos
Chen
The same longing for a father figure can show itself in a longing for a spouse when constantly rejected as a child. Its a longing for love, a love that no one can ever really live up to.
Tom Cunnington very true
Tom Cunnington We need to love ourselves so we don't accept crumbs from others. We are worth it.
Tom Cunnington that's why dealing with one's issues and maturing into a healthily independent person is the key. We have to stop projecting on partners and others. Easier said than done.
Tom Cunnington God does
I couldn't agree more
MEN WITH DADDY ISSUES. All the lost boys out there hiding in grown men's bodies- who never had fathers growing up. We see these men everywhere. Do they know how to treat women properly? Do they know how to be husbands? Do they know how to be fathers? Do they know how to have a hundred responsibilities?
I know some of these men. They are lost. Suicidal. Have addiction issues. Self esteem issues. Are physically abusive to women. Don't know how to hold down jobs. Dont know how to be fathers because they never had one.
Isn't it funny how we don't go around talking about men who have daddy issues?
This is my biggest issue. I can barly find any info about things like this for men. Im to fucking young for this shit.
@@Someones_crow0876 Jordan Peterson maybe?
@@sandywhat2429 i will check it out.
Today a man called me his son, he’ll never know it but it meant the world to me. No man has ever referred to me as “My Son”.
I’m 36 and that man is my colleague in his 50s. I pray God blesses him.
Tell me i'm a naughty girl, school of life.
school of life: call me daddy
These comments made my day.
It sounded like you were gonna say "spank me!" after that
Pizza Pineapple love what is yo picture?? So grossed out.
sTOP
Daddy of the Century goes to Stalin.
His son shot himself in the head in a suicide attempt but he somehow survived. Stalin responded by saying, he cant even shoot straight. At least, his son knew his daddy tho.
How many have you counted?
Nietzsche would disagree Alejandro.
ScrobbleClox Schmox it was an ironic joke.
That was LAST century!
I thought we're all serious here on the internet.
"There are, in the end, no daddys" Why do you hurt my feelings like this?😭
This video made me burst in tears didn’t realise how much I relate
"they'll be proud of us and love us as we are" the way i almost cried when he said that.
Haha me too. I don't know how both of these feel like.
Why am i crying like a little baby while watching this video?
Daddy issues?
Ice and Kandi i guess...
Me too :(
Ice and Kandi aww❤️😣
Same here sis, same here
My dad was beyond flawed and yelled and nagged all the time but it was because he cared so much and was always there even when I wanted him to go away.. I’m very thankful for him!! 💗💗💗
This makes me appreciate my loving father so much more.
my father has never had any interest on me since i was born. my only memories as a child are him hitting and beating me up for such absurd things like, not storing my shoes in the wardrobe. I've seen him being nice with everyone around me, but nearly all the times he's looked at me he's done it with an angry gaze and that caused me to be very afraid when he was around. now I'm 17 and he doesn't hit me anymore but he's caused the majority of my insecurities and my depressed mind. i feel utterly disgusted everytime he pretends to care about me and i know i can't force myself to like him. i just wish i had the courage to tell my mother all of this because they're still together. i just wish i had had a good father. this was quite long and probably no one will read it but i needed to rant
Trust me once you’re able to get out of the house and cut them off they’ll be begging for forgiveness and love from you. The best thing to do right now is to invest In yourself. I’d recommend reading think and grow rich
*hug* it’s going to be okay
@bellius Kim
It sounds like your father is a Narcissist.
My mother is a Narcissist, and her father was an aggressive, yelling, threatening, fist waving, Narcissist tyrant like your father.
Both were monsters behind closed doors.
I understand your pain.
You didn't deserve it.
You deserved to be treated with respect and love. You're a precious person.
I've been processing things with a professional trauma therapist, and I'm so glad to have found her.
It's been painful, and I have to go for a long brisk walk afterwards to defuse the adrenaline, but I'm feeling stronger and more peace, and I'm learning how to deal with the shame that was never mine to carry.
The shame isn't yours either.
Jesus came to heal the brokenhearted, and He understands you and how you feel more than you know. I let Him comfort me. I highly recommend it.❤️
Your story is EXACTLY my story but except he still beats me and I'm 16. Yesterday he beat me again and yelled at me and called me really horrific things. I'm traumatised sm that I want to get out of my house but also I love my mom and my bro
Guys, please go to the police and report the beatings , you are still minors and need to be taken care of
This all makes perfect sense to me. I was so lucky, at the age of nine months old I was adopted by my parents, both of whom are the most incredibly wonderful parents anybody could ever ask for, and my father was the very definition of masculinity, and fatherly love and guidance. He was my role model, and even to this day, I still look up to him even though he’s in his 80s and myself in my late 40s. I bring this up because I have a lot of friends who didn’t have a father when they were growing up, and for some strange reason I seem to attract them, because apparently I’m told I’m very much like my father, I could never understand why my friends looked up to me in a fatherly way instead of a friendship way, now it all makes sense. Whenever we’re all hanging out, I’ve always been very self-assured, very confident, and pretty well-rounded, and as a result most of my male friends sticks to me like glue, particularly the ones who didn’t have a father growing up, I never really thought about it until I saw this video, but it all clicks!, now I appreciate my father even more!
Wow!! That's so interesting! What a blessing for you and you probably are!!
@Vanshri Shankar 😀😀😀
Nice thinking.
Finally, someone who isn't insulting me for the jerk of a father I was stuck with. Thank you.
HAHAH sucks to be you lol
As a father I’m always trying to find where I may fail my son. I had a good dad, not a perfect one but a good one. I’m trying to be better. Videos like this help us learn where we may lack.
That's so nice of you.. You are an amazing father..
I wanna say something as daughter who have a dad who never tell his feelings out. It would be nice if you could say how you care and love your son sometimes. People like you who watch videos like this to improve yourself probably don't let others know that you really care. Just wanna say this cause I used to be like that with my siblings. Once I started being open and telling them and showing them how much I care, our relationship started improving. If only my father did that too.. I don't even know if he really care or doesn't. It confusing and it's slowly drifting us apart more and more..
it's really hard to accept this, but i do have daddy issues, i wanted a father so badly when i was young and all my life really; and now that i'm fully grown it still represents a huge empty space that i don't think i can ever get to fill....it hurts remembering all those times when kids back in school seemed very happy and protected by their parents...whilst i felt abandoned and without a loving dad to rely on. I started to build a wall around me, that served as an impenetrable fortress (substitute for human protection) that has become nearly indestructible, making me an introvert and sad person...i'm writing this in the hopes to tell you that if you're reading this and have children, please be a loving parent, be there, spent time with them, DO NOT walk away...because abandonment leaves scars and trauma and makes unhappy/bitter people.
I’m in my forties and just now really trying to disassemble the wall around me from my absent father and Narc single mother. I feel I’ve been going crazy, and the anger and pain?! Almost has been too much to handle. Right now tho, the anger is paramount. It affects every other thing in my life. I run on micro doses of adrenaline throughout the day from whatever makes me angry. It’s not a good way to live.
cheers
man ik it's late but i just wana say iam in a similar situation and this comment really did hit hard on me and idk how to help myself honestly
This me from start to end.
I am so sorry
@Bryan francois maybe I am 😅🤷🏼♀️
My father always humiliate me , called me names and says offensive words to me. He even compares me with my sister and he likes her more
Your father sounds like a Narcissist.
My mother was a Narcissist, and I'm learning about it while processing her destructive behaviours with a therapist.
You didn't deserve it.
You deserved to be treated with respect and love.
Same 💔
@@caroliner2029 What does a person do if both parents are narcissists?
So relatable. My parents are both narcissist that don’t care my feelings. My narcissistic sister gets all the attention all because she has two sons. I hate my so called family. I never feel loved or wanted. That why I plan to leave once I have the money & live elsewhere. As a disabled woman it’s hard but I’ll try. I cry every day. It’s really taking a toll on my mental health. Just got to find the perfect boathouse to live in.
My father was always absent during my childhood. He was an alcoholic and had many problems, so I knew him very little. I grew up without that father figure who cares and protects you but my mother was always there doing what she could, even though she worked all day. Even though my mother wasn't an emotional support for me either, I learned to be emotionally self-sufficient because I didn't have either of them. In my relationships I have never felt the need to look for what they did not give me, on the contrary, I feel repulsed if they offer me support and protection because I think that if the person leaves and moves away, I am left alone again. In the end, only I can take care of myself and protect myself. Now as an adult, my father is back and trying to do what he didn't do for me in my childhood. It's a feeling that I don't know and it makes me uncomfortable because I don't know how to behave in the face of these attentions. Daddy issues not only arise in the search for what you did not have, it is also the birth of an exaggerated emotional self-sufficiency and repulsion for what you lacked.
Great video. After much teraphy, ex boyfriends, toned down expectations and confidence in my own independent strenght... this video comes as s soothing reminder and even a little comical one. Thank you!
One of my ex's once told me I unconsciously sabotaged our relationship because I have "Daddy issues". I was mad he'd even say such a thing till one day I realized it was the truth..
It's been 2 years do u still have daddy issues
@@stefanugaz uh dude the mental trauma never leaves...you just learn to ignore it
@@bunnitrap9139 did I ask You lol
@@stefanugaz no i just don't like that it feels like you think someone can get rid of it so easily, it doesn't just go away, it's a lifelong think that sabotages your mental health and relationships
I left my ex because she is sabotaging our relationship and treats me like crap.
She had an abusive father and a broken family.
I was about to marry her: an emotionally damaged individual who will likely abuse her future partner. Good thing that I broke up with her.
When y’all gonna drop “Mommy Issues” lmao
man i got both mommy and daddy issues
@@deanajoyy twins
yeah we need both sides of the coin
i mean its pretty much the same i think.Moms are just as important as dads
@@MilesAckerman344 it's the exact opposite, not the same.
My dad was a great father, until he started dabbling in the world of alcohol and pills. From middle school to college I felt like I hated him, but always wanted a relationship deep down, especially since my mother died. Now here I am turning 28 and we’re finally moving in a positive direction. I hope one day my sister and him can do the same. I don’t think he was a terrible dad, just lost his way when life got hard
I wish I’d never met my father im sure it would have caused me less pain than the monstrous things he has put me and my family through
i never had a father, i m looking everywhere for someone to take that role , i still feel that he only exist in my imagination , deep down i know that the one i m longing for never existed
Sophie Bai let me be your daddy! I will take care of you!
it s very kind of you, please excuse my terrible english
Sophie Bai. there a few times where I miss my father, even though he died just when I was born. And sometimes I ask myself "how do you miss someone you've never met?" :/. The fact that my mom and my brother compare my personality and humor to my dad, makes me wonder even more.
Now I mostly find attractive older guys than me, and is sad because I feel that I can't connect with anyone of my age. The only time I was almost into with someone was with a guy of 20, and I was 14/15. u.u
So I'll go ahead and cry as a little girl :'c
Im a 14 year old girl and i cant remember when was the last time i said "dad". I constantly want someone to call my dad and experience having a dad. I miss him especially when father's day is coming. I asked myself also why do you miss him if you didn't even met him or you don't even remember him. My dad died when i was 3 he was my first love and my first heartbreak. Time passed by and i still have a hole in my heart. I tried covering up the hole in my heart by dreaming of what would my life be if he was here and daydreaming him hugging me... I did everything to keep me from coming back to reality.
@@arabellajesalva5414 but reality be in touch
is it bad that i get really sad when i see my friends dads being really good dads? because my dad was an alcoholic and died when i was around 2 and my step dad was always really easily angered and honestly i don't think knew how to be a dad, which i understand and it looks like he's doing better with his kids but still i get a little sad wen i see my friends talking with their dads and mentioning how their parents used to tuck them in at night or carry them on their shoulders and like i'll poke fun at it and jokingly say things like "wow i wish i had a dad" and we'll both laugh but really i do. i wish i'd grown up with some father figure that wasn't always shouting at me or would hit me or pass out drunk on the bathroom floor because now i find that i'm honestly just scared of men and i know there's no good reason for that and that most men are good people who wouldn't just hurt a random girl but i don't know, i wish i had a popper dad
holly yep!
holly same
holly. I know.... because of not having a father since I'm 10 or a mom... I really have a problem just trusting men in general. Even though I got married and had five children I still just don't know quite what to do with men; and I agree there are many good men Out there, so it's not fair not to have trust, but it's just that I don't know, I don't know, I don't know.
Okay God bless you. God gives us the grace to get through if we turned to Him, but I've been a widow for 6 years now, even though I'm going to be 75 soon .....the thought of ever getting married again ever, ever is just beyond me, because I don't want to take a chance ..
of being hurt...
again.
holly I have the same story as you. U are not alone
it isnt bad. we deserved a caring father figure
The school of life helps me got through life with a little more peace. Thank you guys for your work
My dad was a normal one growing up, though he wasn’t always physically present during my recitals, graduations, school curriculums, etc. I always thought of him as somewhat average. We essentially had a normal daughter-father relationship too, but then for sometime later, we had this sort of fall out as I was growing out my preteens. I already knew my mother and father separated back when I was little, however it didn’t affect me that much seeing as I was still going to see them and how they reminded me that they will always he supportive of me every step of the way. Now, I don’t think I can even spare a conversation with my father, I feel really awkward around him and it’s like there’s this thick tension. I don’t know if he’s caught up on that as well, but even so, I often see him trying his best to patch things up like the way they used to be. I appreciate him for that really, and even if I force myself to engage I just still feel weird about it, I honestly don’t know why. It’s been like this ever since, way worse than now knowing that both my parents are physically and emotionally unable right now. It sucks, I wake up everyday by myself with knowing family members and a few relatives, but still not mother and father, the former in abroad and the latter constantly traveling because of their workforces. Maybe I might be overreacting I don’t know, I don’t really like thinking about this particular flaw in my life because it reminds me of how lonely I am and lonelier will I become. Life’s not worth living at the moment but I chose to, for them. And it hurts, knowing that they don’t even know this.
Yooo I don’t have a dad
That boi left
same..
Yooo mine too
Love ur name
Sad
Good for you and him. Unironically.
My dad passed away when I was 5, so this video really hits home. Since I was so little I have very vague memories of him, but I love when my mum and other people who knew him tell me anecdotes about him, what he did and didn't like, etc...I miss him so much, but I know he's in a better place now :)
Andrea M come here I'll protect you
Andrea M Mine passed last year and I surprisingly had my first dream about him last night, so it does hit home. Scary how on time it is.
Marco Polo why don't you shut the hell up and stop stalking every girls comment?
So if I bury myself I get to ignore my wife and kid is what you are telling me.
@diary absh
I'm actually a guy, but no offense taken rofl xD
Born in Italy and there Andrea is a common male name, Andreina is used for females...As you can imagine (since I live outside Italy) people confusing my gender happens ALL THE TIME, but I find it hilarious and laugh it out pretty easily. I take a healthy pride on my heritage and the fact that it was my father who chose my name makes it even more precious to me :)
Thanks for standing up for me nonetheless
I too have somewhat "daddy issues".
My father abandoned me because of his love for work.
When he lost his job he moved away and abandoned our family.
I had to become my own shield, my own protector, my own torch in the darkness. My mother was to dependent on my father and thus weak. I had to support her and myself at the an age of 10. I'm lucky I can call myself a strong person otherwise I would have been ripped to shreds mentally.
Your ideas are always worth pondering and show people a decent, practical way out to manage the psychological complexities of life. Thank You ❣️
I know what I have clicked on and I know I should have been prepared. But the amount of the word "daddy" in this video makes me slightly uncomfortable....
My father has always been around, but he never spent quality time with me growing up. He never talked to me or played with me. Nobody did really (lmao cool story bro). Anyway and he was never "on my side" or there to protect me from anything. All he did was take me to school, give me money and take me back home. No wonder I call my boyfriend daddy and expect him to take care of me and protect me from the world. I also find all the little things he does so amazing and cool. He's the coolest person I know! Also very big and strong to me. I guess I have daddy issues and I'm just realising this at 19 🤷🏽♀️ thanks school of life!
Hmm how old is your boyfriend? 🤔
@@veritasabsoluta4285 11 😀😀😀😀
Sage I have the same situation as you but with my moms DISGUSTING abusive partner never had a real pa
Same. I barely have a bond with my father like I do with my mother. I used to think it was weird for children to kiss their parents. I told him I go therapy and he didn’t even ask why. We barely hold conversations, he doesn’t compliment me, never made me feel loved. He fulfils all physical needs as a a father which I’m grateful for. However none of my emotional or mental needs are fulfilled, I feel empty sometimes and want to be loved and coddled by a man.
@@vanessak.9168 We guys are usually terrible at expressing our emotions, maybe you should suggest doing an activity together that you would both enjoy to bond a little.
I’ve never really felt the need to fill the absence of my Biological Father until my abusive stepfathers made me feel like I was abandoned. They really pointed out every time that I was a mistake and that was unwanted. Which was even more hurtful than just his absence itself.
Why the hell am I crying while watching this video
My feelings of abandonment started after my mom&dad got divorced. He idolized my older brother cause he is his only son. I never got the validation from my dad that I wanted. He got married again and got a step daughter two years younger than me. He gave her everything that I wanted from him. Love, acknowledgement, piano and singing lessons. I cried every time it was his time to have me over at weekends, cause I never got to spend time with him, I was only left to play with my step-sister, who was incredibly bossy and bratty. He made me feel bad for receiving a new bike from a step dad. Who also turned out to be an asshole. I felt so pushed aside and unimportant. Luckily I have a very good mother. The worst of all, I don't think he even realized, or even cares, of the impact all of this had on me. I am depressed and have anxiety disorder. But Today I am 28 years old and have a very amazing and caring boyfriend for 4 years now, and we are going to marry. I have learned from this. I have always been very picky on a future spouse and potential father for my children. I know my partner is gonna be amazing and proper father figure for our children and I'm thankful for that. I am gonna create the loving, caring, wholesome family life that I always craved for. If anything, I am glad it happened to me and not my future children, cause now I know what to look out for, what to look for, and turn things to the better. XOXO
Your story touched my heart. I'm so happy that you're hopeful for your future self& future family. Best wishes to you!🤗🤗💖💖