Is physical attraction important in a relationship? | JBU Episode 7
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- čas přidán 18. 08. 2020
- He is a really great man, kind, gentle, loving godly, it’s just that I’m not physically attracted to him! She’s the sweetest ever, she’s an angel but we don’t just have that chemistry....
Can I go ahead and marry him? marry her?
How important is physical attraction? Can I end an otherwise great relationship for this one reason?
This is what I tried to address here. I look forward to your comments.
Please comment, like and subscribe!
relationships, #marriage, #candidconvo, #realtalk, #whotomarry, #christianrelationships, #christianmarriage, #franktalk, #courtship, #physicalattraction #chemistry #tounfadugba
Whenever I read the verse "beauty is fleeting" in Psalm 31:30 I am always reminded that in the blink of an eye your physical appearance can change in an instant due to unforeseen circumstances beyond your control. That is why as much as I agree physical attraction is important, it is a person's character that is long lasting and can even outlast a person's physical appearance. I enjoyed listening to this episode!
Nonye I Thanks so much for your comment! I agree with you! That’s such a valid point !....And like my Mom would always joke that when the men get to middle age , they all look alike anyways with bald heads and pot bellies lol
I think if we wait on God to match us, there will be a balance of both 😊.
This is such a balanced perspective. Most people are either on one side of the spectrum or the other. So I liked that you encouraged to give it a try, but to stop if we never get to a point of being excited [physically] about them. Thanks pastor T. Always a fun watch as per usual.
Thanks Omasan for watching and sharing your thoughts ❤️
@@tounfadugba attractiveness is baseline. If its not there it will not work
You know how you date someone & after you break up, you wonder what attracted you to them in the 1st place? 🤣..I think it shows that we definitely can move past the physical, love someone for who they are and they can start becoming phycially attractive to us. Hence, I love your point about giving it some time. I also agree that it's very important and should never be overlooked.
When we do ab internal deep dive, we may also discover that it is a character or expection flaw we need to fix....like "what will people think", or Hollywood/Media perspective in our minds that needs to be fixed. Sometimes, it is us, not the person 🙈. Love it and Thank you Pastor Toun 👍🏾
Hi Sholz ! Thanks so much for watching and sharing. I love your perspective about it sometimes being about us and not them! So true!
Here is my rule No physical attraction=no sex! Being married to someone I do not find physically attractive means the marriage will have no form of sex and would be treated more like a room mate I share a house with! I don’t know how people ended up mixing different relationship characteristics to a sexual partner. A person with good qualities that are lacking in physical attraction belong in the friend zone and nothing more. You cannot base everything on personality alone. Think of it as hiring a worker, ideally you want a worker with a fitting personality but they still need to be capable to do the job which is what they are paid to do. I have seen many people with great personalities get fired because despite their good traits admired by many, they lacked the necessary skills or could not learn the job quick enough which affected the company’s performance. It’s the same for physical relationships. We should not endure a relationship where the person cannot fulfill the sexual obligation and should be categorized as a different relationship!
Physical attraction can be worked on , use money to make yourself beautiful or handsome. Physical exercise can also help
Great point! I should have mentioned this too
Thanks for sharing
This is the exact video am looking for
Thank you ma!
True!
It's important, but not at the top. Attraction can grow.
I love how you balanced the topic 🙏🏽
Hmmm. Like I tell my friends, I cannot start a relationship en distance. I prefer getting to know people directly.
Thanks for watching and sharing your thoughts too 😊👍🏽
Thank you! Was very blessed 😊
You are welcome 🙏🏽
thanks for sharing Pastor T!
Funke O. My pleasure Funke! Thanks for watching 😊
The sarcasm at some point😂😂.. love you Pastor T
Thanks Ediyangha ! 🤣🤣🤣
Wow ma'am I just found you and I love your channel. This message is so beautiful.
Thank you Sis God bless
@@tounfadugba and bless you too Ma'am
I’m about to give guys I’m less attracted to a chance because the type of guys I’m initially attracted to get ugly real fast!
How has that gone so far?
Wow...this is another pivotal topic. The insights you gave are on point. In my opinion..I agree that the couple should get to know each other better. I believe by so doing, both parties can decide on the next steps...Furthermore, I believe the lady can help revamp her guy and vice versa if it were the lady.. All things been equal, if the virtues that both couple so desire are in place, I believe they can both work on the physical aspect.
Thanks much for sharing Mimi 😊
I love the idea about being able to help each other improve the looks . That’s a great point for this topic!
errrr, that just sounds easy on paper. In reality, not so much. If a guy talked about revamping his woman who he doesnt enjoy screwing, you think the female community will take kindly to that? Why should I have to revamp someone (which requires a lot more effort) instead of find someone whose look I am satisfied with. And when are grown ass people gonna stop expecting magic to happen, that as his good qualities come to light, an unattractive person is suddenly gonna become sexy? It doesn't work that way!! Many have tried and many, many, many, many more have tried and failed!!
Yes but i'm attracted to men outside my race, i'm black and i aint going with someone who isn't attractive because if he wanted intimacy i wouldn't be able to give him that..hell naw!
Thank you so much ma'am for this.....am currently with a guy who is asking me to marry him, he has all the qualities I need in a man but am not physical attracted to him. I can't even kiss him ..
🙏🏽 Hmm...🤔
then why even bother???! Omg, you gotta walk away asap.
@@tounfadugbawhat are you trying to say exactly?
@@Dancediva240 I would have said exactly what you said i.e. don’t bother , walk away. However its not clear how long she has known him. She may not like him at first sight, or for the first couple of weeks but if all the other qualities she wants are present, there is the possibility of physical attraction developing with time. If however things remain the same , oh yes she should walk away. No woman has any business marrying a man they “can’t even kiss” 😒
@@tounfadugba if he asking her to marry him, more than likely they have known each other a while. Unless this is a whirlwind situation.
What if you have given urself 5 years n are still not attracted to the person despite the fact that the one in question has many other good qualities. You find yourself struggling to love the person as much as he loves u. Should you go ahead n proceed from dating to marriage?
Hello Therese, I don’t think you should proceed to marry a man that you are still struggling to love after dating them for 5 years 🤷🏽♀️
@@tounfadugba thank you for the reply