Harsh Criticism From a Doctor | How To Diffuse Any Argument!
Vložit
- čas přidán 21. 08. 2024
- Here's a story of something that happened to me in my fourth year of medical school during rotations. This experience although not a fun one, did better me so I thought it would be beneficial to share with you guys!
I am all about empathy and conflict resolution. Once I began to read research on the subject I quickly realized I was already doing many of the steps needed to diffuse emotional situations. I think you may see yourself taking some of these steps without ever being formally educated on verbal judo.
I will be back with another video this coming Sunday at 11am EST, so subscribe and hit those posting notifications!!!
Please SUBSCRIBE for new videos every Sunday 11am EST ▶ goo.gl/87kYq6
Let’s connect:
Patreon / doctormike
IG goo.gl/41ZS7w - Doctor Mike
Reddit / doctormike
Twitter goo.gl/kzmGs5 - Real Doctor Mike
Facebook goo.gl/QH4nJS - Real Doctor Mike
Contact Email: DoctorMikeMedia@Gmail.com
P.O. Box (send me stuffs):
340 W 42nd St # 2695
NY, NY 10108
* The information in this video is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. All content, including text, graphics, images, and information, contained in this video is for general information purposes only and does not replace a consultation with your own doctor/health professional professional*
Yup it’s the same with nursing! Some nurses are amazing with nursing students and new nurses and others we just stay away from.
Fight me
@Unoriginal User
*Fights*
@@fiercecoffee1634 Stop bullying me :(
This is the best comment section ever.
my preceptor is so awful, he is a great nurse, but he just doesnt know how to be with a student.
*As soon as I saw "Harsh Criticism" I flashed back to every holiday when my family came over and told me what was wrong with me and how to fix it.* 😂😂😂
*"Yes Aunt Sally! I am tired! Why thank you for noticing the bags beneath my eyes! They're designer! Premed student + finals approaching doesn't give much room for rest! But you're right! I should take up crocheting because I have so much time to!* 🙃
JustCallMeBo relatable 😂😂 And the "do you have a boyfriend?" question too.
oof
i agree- i get skinny-shamed by my family members.
That feeling when your familly is like "Look at your brother, look at your sister, look at your cousin, look at your friend, look at me, look at your mother, look at your father. Why do you like making us hurt? Why don't you do this? Why do you bother doing this? This is worthless. You're wasting your time. You're wasting our time. You're wasting your life. You should try to make efforts. Do something good for once." Let me eat my cake and do my fucking taxes OK?
@UCpwioAkgILmDL8mfg-Wuktw Mean? Men are "skinny shamed" all the time.
Great advice but truth is bullies are everywhere. Criticism is almost always helpful but being deliberately hurtful is something else. I hate bullies in any profession.
If I could upvote this comment twice I would. Some people are so mean spirited.
My trans issues in a nutshell^^
Someone put it this way: if a "professional" treats his subordinates badly, it doesn't really matter what the subordinate did, he's not really helping them. If he starts getting the inevitable flack for yelling at or abusing his colleagues, that's his problem and no one else's.
Words of wisdom from Dr. Mike. Not only he teach you how to get healthier health, he’s also teach you how to be better in life
Healthier health 🤣🤣🤣
QUALITY CONTENT👌
FINEST CONTENT👌👌
CONTENT AT ITS FINEST👌👌
HeLthIer hEltH 100
When you actually learn more from a CZcams video than school.
Facts
Someone isn’t paying attention in school then lmao...
Lol I guess you weren't a very good student then.
Terrifically Trisha woah that’s high praise!!!
Honestly.
Your story about how that doc treated you made me sad, but THANK YOU for this important lesson. As a 2nd year medical student I know I will keep this in mind, practice charitable thinking, learn to use some judo (verbally) and bring that to the following years of my training.
xlalaladida glad your judo will only be verbal otherwise you may run into trouble!😂😂😂😂
Agreed! And if we survive long enough to become attendings and have a colleague that pulls nonsense like this, we will look his unfortunate student in the eye with a kind smile. Perhaps even say "My, what a short prescription list!" then change the subject and move on.
Its like the movie whiplash. The teacher humiliates the student so the student would work more.
DESPACITOOOOOOOOOOOOO
If you ever want to leave family medicine, you'd make a wonderful therapist Dr. Mike!
That’s a powerful compliment, thank you!
@@DoctorMike BTW, totally off the subject, but you said in another video you wanted to go to Santorini, I encourage you to go ASAP! It was one of the most beautiful places I've ever been.
Oh ya
I like all the points on focusing on what the doctor does best and with the verbal judo with one 'but': when the doctor trashes you in front of the patient, it's not only humiliating, it also makes the patient question your competence. Add my Russian accent to the situation and the patient looks at me like I have no idea what I am doing... until I barked back at the doctor and she stopped...
I guess, we have to try our best to keep the peace, but sometimes certain individuals are just asking for it :D
:D
I had a professor tell me I would never be able to function in the real world or be a professor due to my disabilities. I looked at him and said okay and thanked him for taking time out of his day to meet with me. In my head I was thinking watch me prove you wrong, and I did. I delivered my report in front of my peers loud and clear resulting in receiving applause from them. I received an A for the assignment and an A for his class but I still reported him for saying that to a student after being handed a letter about my accommodations for my disabilities.
Good for you ! You did exactly the right thing. 😊
Wish you well for the future 🤗
HELL YEAH!! Congrats!
Using a persons toxicity and negativity to trigger you're determination to the max and prove them wrong, is a fantastic way of pushing the boundaries and proving to yourself that you can do it! I've been there. The ultimate prize was the sheer look of disappointment on their face, when I surpassed my goal. WELL DONE TO YOU!!!🎉
@Kurtis Conner *ROUND OF APPLAUSE* lmao can you please review this comment hahaha
You have such a optimistic outlook on life and in your career. It’s so exciting to hear someone actually talk about the best parts of life. Because of you, being more optimistic is one of my New Years Resolutions. Thank you!
I agree, i love the advice he has to give in such an optimistic point of view.
"optimisticly" agree 😂
"I'd rather be a pessimist because then I can only be pleasantly surprised.”
― Ben Franklin
Ooooo Dr Mike I struggled here! That doctor was bullying you. And he needed someone to tell him he was being unprofessional and mean. But I absolutely understand where you are coming from in this video with how to deal with it. When you are the student, and are being graded, it's hard to speak up against bad behaviour by senior clinicians. I know - I am a vet student. Nobody wants to be the martyr. But I believe you should speak up when something is wrong. Difficult situation. Your advice in this video is absolutely correct for what you are trying to get across - how to deescalate. But I don't know if its correct to deescalate and not stand up for yourself in all situations.
Yeah, seems like his advice is basically to bend over and take it
exactly!!! I really hated it tbh. but I trust he has good intention, I just would never take this advice. @@mrbouncelol
@@Jesszicar It can have good outcome, but some people just doesn't care about deescalation and just want to bully and provoke you to burst out. Some people just straight out twist the actual event to straight out lie. It's hard to find right way, if you burst out, they will bash you even more "look what an aggressive ahole" or similar and if you bow to it like Mike said "I get why this can make you angry" that's like acknowledging that it is true, even if it's big fat lie.
My wife is a nurse in hospital and they have an "orderly" at department (idk how to call the work position in English, this is what google translate gives me...basically they take of patient's hygiene[for most part], positioning, help with feeding, taking patients to examinations, etc.) that is really messing with anybody who say a bad word to her. Everybody is afraid to tell her anything, even long serving nurses and they just not tell he any criticism to not get her anger taken out on them. They even do some of her work so they don't have to say her anything. My wife being new there didn't know what kind of a person she is, and she couldn't take that young girl is saying her what to do (even though she wasn't "ordered" her to do something, just politely asking if she could do it). So now she is just making out lies about my wife. She is provoking my wife all the time so she could say something bad about her when she won't stand it anymore. Now if my wife would just bend over and take it, she will just ride her all the time, if she talks up to her, she would defame her behind her back and make her look bad for everybody, even patients. It's like impossible situation.
Arrogant people like this just exist anywhere and bending over isn't solutions in many cases. Maybe it help in misunderstandings with otherwise understanding people, but it won;t help you when somebody is aiming to make your life sucks...
NO he wasn't. He was actually being nice to Mike. Thankyou very much!
The way I see it:
If someone is intentionally being malicious, deescalation will have no effect and it's better to stand up for yourself
If someone is being unintentionally malicious, deescalation might work but it's still good to let them know their behavior isn't cool
The positivity that you radiate in such huge amounts is insane to me. There hasnt been one video of yours that I have watched and not smiled, so thank you. Genuinely.
I think I have social anxiety so I constantly want to better myself, but then I have this anxiety of people saying “OOOOOH YOU DONT KNOW THAT” which is why I avoid the conversations. i don’t want to be embarrassed. Or even isolate what I love to do which is sing. So watching this video makes me want to better myself. Doctor Mike, you make me always want to better myself. Which I appreciate 💛
GO GIRL ! BE YOURSELF AND BE HAPPY ABOUT IT ! 🤗💗
I too think I have social anxiety, and I have the greatest dad but he just doesn't understand the concept of mental health also English not being our first language, he understands the literal meaning but not the subtleties of it, the other day he was trying to explain(that's probably not the right word here) something to me and said "you hate people" and I was like dad I don't hate people I'm an introvert ur a extrovert, he thinks I'm making excuses and if I just tried .... well u know. There is no such thing as anxiety and depression is when someone is super super upset and sad, I don't have problems I'm just lazy, he comes from a very different kind of upbringing, where his parents mostly left him alone, he and uncles and aunt grew up mostly on their own, lack of contact with people outside of their community, lack of knowledge, and lack of time and just plain living life according to their customs and traditions...all these things resulted in a lack of understanding of what mental health
Not knowing something is just a part of learning. Experience matters, but to gain the experience you have to be very persistent. Don't care what people are going to say, because most of them will try to tear you down when you don't know something and when you succeed they will put a mask on. Get rid of the wrong people and care and concetrate on the right ones. God bless.
Seems like it is restricting you, that is usually the point when you should get something checked (in regards to mental health)
You can really only benefit from this, seek a diagnosis, then you can learn how to deal with it.
Schools or colleges sometimes have free counseling, that's a first step to get referred somewhere, maybe there is an organization in your community that can help you.
I understand that it's hard to do, especially with social anxiety.
But it's really the best step you can take.
Mike, this might be one of the most important videos on the Internet actually!
I definitely agree!
seriously
@@unoriginaluser575 WTF dude 😂😂😂😂
Wow, that's narcissistic abuse. You're right they don't act like total assholes all the time. The trick wouldn't work that way. Their pattern involves using intermittent reinforcement with love-bombing and devaluation because that creates the strongest bond. For example, he gave you freedom then denigrated you for making mistakes in front of patients, even shamed you in front of colleagues to make himself feel superior. You gave good tips for dealing with difficult people when you have to. Mental tai chi! Great job choosing not to work with him long-term even though you loved sports medicine and working in NY. No Contact is the ideal way of dealing with people like that because then you can use all the energy that you used to spend just managing the relationship instead for the good fight, for what you actually want to grow in your life.
I love your channel and videos
Dr Mike can you make a video on scoliosis? Since I’ve been diagnosed with this; telling people ends up being a 10 minute explanation because there isn’t enough information about this topic.
yeah, and I would like a video on celiac disease.
Me too.... So difficult to deal with people sometimes... It just keeps on getting irritating
Oof same my dude. PT is helping though
yeah I've been waring a brace for 2 years and was close to getting surgery bu luckily only had to to physical therapy . It's pretty common but no one seems to talk about it.
suki I got a brace but I can’t wear it. Every time I put it on I start crying. I’m petrified of invasive back surgery especially because I’m very athletic and can’t stand being away from my sports.
This was great advice. I feel like a lot of older people in the medical field eat their young which sucks because those are the people that teach us a lot about text book vs real life experiences. Thank you for showing me a different outlook on these type of interactions ☺️
I eat my babies all the time. The black ones are the most nutritious.
This is so helpful for me. I’m an animator and our whole career is about criticism basically and as a perfectionist I really struggle to not take it personally!
Julia d I’m a beginner animator and i just started studying in the field. I guess this video will help me in the future
Julia d I can’t imagine the stress of animating as a career. I’ve drawn for years and a friend asked me to design a tattoo for them, it was so hard for me to let go of my better judgement and basically let someone else tell me what looked best. Kudos to you man.
Blah blah
OwlsSkySailing haha thanks! It’s definitely a learning curve! Sometimes you just have to concede which may seem impossible but it’s something that you can’t control!
FeiYuin Definitely and I think remembering that there’s always progression be had and you can always learn more! Just because someone says something negative does not mean it reflects on you as an artist. They are just applying their knowledge to the task at hand.
Oh god this is gold! Dr mike please elaborate on how not to dwell on the negative... Its so difficult as a sensitive person to deal with rude and mean people around us. 💜🌼 #beewoop 😊
Yayy a heart reaction from dr mike 😊 sunshine! ☀️
My last 8 week rotation for my Masters in Speech Language Pathology was at an inpatient rehab and I was really excited about it. However, my supervisor was horrible and belittled me like that. I worked so hard those 8 weeks and really enjoyed working with the patients but she did nothing but complain about me. She gave me an F for my grade when my previous clinic supervisors had given me A's. My program's clinic director called the chick to see why she had graded me so harshly she didn't have answer but agreed to change it to a C.
Usually its because the instructor feels threatened by your intelligence or something he or she dislikes in you; some they wish they could have but don't. I had a preceptor who was ghastly. Several of the others told me it was because I wasn't "fat". WTF? ,
I deal with difficult people on a daily basis. Working at a veterinary clinic is very stressful. You have upset pet owners, sick/injured pets, stressed-out coworkers/doctors. I’m just grateful everyday because of love & compassion. ❤️ 😊
You always seem to look at the positive and I like that about your personality. Thanks Dr. Mike. 💙👨🏻⚕️
You all in the med fields get us at our worst times. Bless you all.
You are more than a "doctor".
You specialize in EVERYTHING.
Remember it is *more difficult to get into veterinary school than medical school.*
"What do you call a vet who specializes in one species?
A doctor." Much love!!
Could you record and post Huskies back talking to vets?
I work as a registered dietitian at an SNF and I find myself getting frustrated a lot. Thank you for your advice. I’m working on being mindful of my words and actions. I have a great appreciations for doctors and I’m very lucky that have a great medical director at my SNF.
*falls asleep*
Dr Mike is so smart but so innocent and it’s adorable
I highly recommend The Gentle Art of Verbal Self-Defense by Suzette Haden Elgin.
*me yelling from the back of the room* DROP THE DOCS NAME SO I CAN LEAVE HIM A BAD YELP REVIEW
quit snitchin cuh
Sometimes that's not even necessary, they can't hide that personality forever. I knew a provider that was regularly verbally abusive with her staff, and one day a patient overheard. A most well-deserved and scathing Yelp review followed.
Unoriginal User woah there buddy
@@unoriginaluser575 well this escalated quickly
guys. this was a joke. calm down.
Such an insightful video! Even people in the nursing field like me face constant backlash from other nurses. As a student, I myself am not accustomed to negative feedback, which makes it hard not to take it personally, but then I realize that I am there to learn,like you in your 4th year, so I could forgive myself for my lack of knowledge.
*yeeeet*
This video is going in my saved lists. Practical n wise advise. Thanks!
I was disappointed to hear of these personalities coming from seasoned doctors, and imposing them onto "newbs." I cant say that Im surprised however, because humans are humans. Thanks for posting this video and sharing your experiences! I have a habit of taking everything to heart. It seems for this profession, you have to thicken your skin and expect criticism
Great advice and tips, as always, Dr. Mike!
"Prescription for knowledge" is absolutely something Dr. Cox (from Scrubs) would do.
Thanks! I needed to hear this. Currently a OMS3 student that just finished my surgery service/rotation. There are still moments where I beat myself up for not remembering or forgetting easy things out of the blue. And I somehow forget in those instances of the good that I've done throughout the rotation. We tend to focus on the negatives and somehow forget to acknowledge the positives.
This is one of the reasons why I admire you Dr Mike. At around 2.54, I was thinking "charitable thinking", and then you mentioned it. I think that is really nice. I might need to work on that personally. I've learned that people's negative attitude is more about them than me so I don't let it get to me anymore. I also think some people are naturally generous like you, so they have more "charitable thinking" than others. You remind me of my Grandpa who is the "king of charitable thinking". People have hurt him including his children but he still loves them and is not bitter. That is some emotional evolution right there. Anyway, you seem to be a great person and thanks for all you do!
Where I work I'm the only woman working in my department (the tech support department) and there is a LOT of negativity toward me from customers and I always take it with a smile, but inside I get pretty upset. Even with my coworkers, if I slip up once, or just haven't learned something yet I tend to get belittled. As the only woman I feel like I'm constantly having to prove myself. I love what I do and I love proving everyone wrong, it can be a bit taxing sometimes though.
man that sounds exhausting! I wish you luck and that you don't lose your ability to smile when everyone else is being an asshole.
I am with you!. You are a wonderful, strong woman. More strenght and happiness to you👌👌👌☺☺👊
This comes in absolutely right time. I've move to another country and I'm dealing with persons EXACTLY like that... EXACTLY.
Thanks doc, I will save this video.
This was the BEST advise in the best time. You are the best man.
#Peewoop
Yeah same...
Fight me fuckhead
Waauw this was like my experience 2 months ago. I’m a student nurse and I was in my placement for 6 weeks in the children’s ward. OMG my mentor she was a real life WITCH. She didn’t want to teach me, she was soo harsh, rude and clearly an uncompassionate nurse. Those 6 weeks were is difficult I would leave the ward in tears some days . I hated how nasty and cold those nurses were. Anyway I reported them to people in a high position and now they have to respond back with how they will take this report and improve as individuals and as a team. I hope they change but this probably even more bitter. But I’m so glad I reported them, I didn’t want future students to suffer under the hands of such horrible people.
Happy that I didn’t give up and that they couldn’t make me insecure like them☺️
I had a nursing clinical instructor like that too... almost made me drop out because I would wake up before clinical with so much anxiety and just start crying. By the end of the term I was more angry that she made me feel that way and stood my ground in daily interactions but had to be careful because she had the power - she decided if I passed the term or not. I hate nursing culture 😒
Wow. If you can't handle a harsh mentor, how you gonna handle the harsh real world? Put on your big girl pants! Sounds like a GREAT tactic for weeding out the people who shouldn't be there.
@@angelbear_og I don't think bullying/harassing a colleague/mentee is good in any situation... I can handle difficult patients, but I don't appreciate it when a person I am supposed to be looking up to is rude, demeaning, and belittling. That doesn't sound like a healthy environment that promotes growth and learning to me in any context!
Angel with the Phonebox [Angel Bear] um, no. Nobody should have to put up with bullying.
Angel with the Phonebox [Angel Bear] I feel bad for the people who work for you. You sound like a witch yourself
Thank you so much for this video Dr. Mike!!! I'm a person who actually bit my self up when a criticism (even the smallest one) is thrown at me. I constantly degrade my self for not knowing something or not to be able to do what everyone can do. This video made me realize to focus on the positive side instead on dwelling on the negative. It may be a hard habit to stop but I will try my best. #Peewoop #VerbalJudo #Fighting
When I was training as a nurse in the uk, I had a mentor who was the same. So I took her to one side and basically told her where to get off. I don't have the kind of personality to tolerate what I consider unprofessional behaviour.
The ward sister shook my hand for standing up for myself at the end of my placement...my mentor was a flat out bully who needed putting in her place so she didn't do it to other students.
"A prescription for knowledge"
I'll steal this one.
As someone who does judo at a high level, I can confirm that’s definitely not judo😂 all jokes aside, great video!
No one cares
yet you care to comment, fuck off!
Sam Ashton why is this part so funny? 😂 Also, I agree with you
@@unoriginaluser575 Dr Mike does
@@unoriginaluser575 yikes
You are not just a professional, but also a kind man. It makes me so happy to see good men on this planet!
What a strong and positive message!! I had a similar experience, as a post graduate student at University, with my thesis supervisor. I remember myself crying bitter tears, after she had made me look like a fool during my final thesis presentation. For years I blamed mostly myself, not her, for allowing her to intimidate me. In the end, this experience only made me wiser and stronger! Thanks for another great video, Dr Mike!!
I can’t with you, Doctor Mike!! YOU AMAZE ME EVERY TIME!!! I love how you share your knowledge with your audience and followers! Thank you so much for the amazing content!
@@unoriginaluser575 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Omg, thanks! Thats me literally few weeks ago and Im a SECOND YEAR MEDICAL STUDENT! GOSH I NEVER UNDERSTAND THEIR EXPECTATIONS?
WELL GOOD LUCK 😁😁😁
@@khawlanaitlkadi8082 Hahahahha yeahhh, thankssss 😂😂
*reeeeeeeeee*
Everyone is not perfect. We learn from our mistakes. I know that people can easily see what we did wrong and they can talk about us. But it’s always good to see their words as an advice that will help us strengthen up and learn from our mistakes. Cheer up, Doctor Mike. You got this!
I've had this type of relationship with a teacher I was matched with for my last practicum... Not good for my own health, ended up going to my doctor for severe despression, stress and anxiety and have continued to feel this since then (not as often though which is awesome).
This line of thinking is very similar to nonviolent communication, which is also a great concept I'm sure you'd love!
Reeeeeeeeee
I have a Spanish teacher who is the same. I try my hardest to learn, and I’m not at the bottom of the barrel, nor am I at the top. But every time she makes a snarky remark like complimenting everyone on my table, then saying that “oh (my name)... is just (my name).”
Like... Oh Jessica... she’s just Jessica.
Oh mark... he’s just mark.
There were so many times where she picked on me and generally made me feel bad about myself.
Do I think she’s a bad teacher or a cruel person? No. She can be really nice at times and shows concern. Nobody is unbiased after all. But teachers need to realize that not everyone learns at the same pace and being passive aggressive about it does not help.
Teachers need to learn, otherwise they are only teaching from their failures and not their successes.
And sadly, I don’t believe in the good in all people. There are genuinely awful people. Genetics play a role in personality, and so does nurture. Psychopaths, sociopaths, and other complexes are not always nurtured.
Empathy is important, but balance is also important. You cannot always be kind, because people will take advantage of your kindness.
Dr Mike is level- headed and understanding even when he is criticized and attacked! Another reason to love Dr Mike. Also, thanks for sharing that you sometimes get angry or depressed, I never would've been able to tell. You seem so happy
Thank you for sharing this experience and for being so honest. It’s happened to me while working for a doctor myself and I did not know how to handle the situation. One... I was too young and two... I had to work with him I had no choice. I wish I knew what I know now which I now teach my oldest kids. It would of saved me tons of tears and 🤫 a horrible confrontation I had the last day I worked for him and I walked out. I do not advise that at all. 😢 Did not have control of my feelings back then. Thank God that was 30yrs ago but it still comes to mind when I hear it happen to others. Ppl are very mean sometimes. Knowledge is awesome and I celebrate it but it should never make you feel more than anyone. That’s what I teach my kids. 🙏🏼🙌🏼👍🏼 Thanks again.
The majority of my family is in the medical field: my mom, my dad, my dad's girlfriend, my uncles and aunts, etc. And all of them have dealt with "difficult personalities," as you called it, but my grandmother got tricked out of a job by one. She and a co-worker agreed with their manager that they would both retire around the same time and that my grandmother would work part-time to make up for the loss of two full-time employees. My grandmother turned in all her paperwork and stopped working. She wasn't allowed to begin part-time until her co-worker retired as well. However, the co-worker told my grandmother last minute that she changed her mind and no longer felt like retiring. The only reason my grandmother even retired in the first place was because she was promised a part-time position, but her manager took that offer away due to her co-worker not retiring. She was left with neither a full-time position nor a part-time position. The co-worker had a bad history with my grandmother as well so no one was surprised. My grandmother is just too trusting and willing to forgive. It's a nice trait to have at times but it cost her a job.
So early the video is still blurry 😂 PEEWOOP! Also, love your channel! 😊😊
Try to get the best out of people, don’t dwell on negatives, verbal judo: empathize with angry people (reflect on the reaction). Thank you so much for putting this very straightforward
How much I wished all people understood this way of positive thinking. We could solve so many problems on earth. Congrats on realising how to approach this at such a young age Dr. Mike!
Not sure about other countries, but in mine, the only ads that appear on Mikes’ videos are about health, healthy food, hospitals (importance on being checked) and stuff related to have a healthy lifestyle. I find that really cool.
Plz make a collab with the comedian Dr. Ken Jeong!!!
Oopsie doopsie
@@unoriginaluser575 what?
@@ifteharulhaque2600 what a madlad
@@unoriginaluser575 send him to the ranch
@@ifteharulhaque2600 we are being turned into muslims
I’m in nursing school rn! I CAN RELATE SO MUCH TOO THIS VIDEO! 🙃 The difference in personality in teacher, TA’s and students can definitely give you whiplash!
I've had this experience working in the nonprofit world as a new therapist gaining my clinical hours. Some people are not meant to be therapists and others are even worse at being clinical supervisors. Finding the right person/people/community is so vital to our learning as well as how we sub sequentially treat our own clients. Thanks for sharing these tips
This video boosted my mood, thanks!
We're all going to die for nothing.
@@unoriginaluser575 Nah lol
such a great video!! wish I had it last year when I was in a toxic work environment. these are such great things to keep in mind and follow!! thanks Dr. Mike!!❤️
Ur mum is a carrot
I was raised to see the good in everyone as much as I could, and I have seen that most people I've interacted with in my life do the opposite and assume the worst in people automatically.
I can 1000% percent agree with focusing on people’s strengths!!
One of the greatest things I’ve learned from pharmacy is to keep an open mind and understand that, just like the new circulation of drugs, people are constantly learning and developing. Plus teaching someone something the 2nd or 3rd time is better than causing medical errors. There are no dumb questions!!!
Thanks for your positive attitude.
Great approach to volotile situations. And a positive outlook on life. Great job, Dr. Mike.
He’s thinking of why he got criticised while I’m sitting here thinking about why refrigerator doesn’t have a d in it like fridge
I had a spinal fluid leak 21 days after a micro lumbar discectomy. I am so glad my surgeon had great bed side manners and the nurses were great.
hey mike! been waiting for this vid since monday! ive been busy this week and this 6 min is really all i have to kinda relax. love your vids and working on a letter for you!!💙💙
One of the most effective techniques that I have learned when it comes to verbal judo is to say, "You may be right about that." Although I don't know if that would work well for a medical student facing an established physician, but it does work in most scenarios. The other person doesn't get all defensive and want to prove how right he/she is, and inside you get to think, "I don't agree at all with your opinion, but I don't feel like fighting with you because I am more grown up than that."
lol i have a coworker who will smile and wish you to have a great day when inside he really means go f*&* yourself. Now I am always suspicious when he wishes me a good day! but you are right, sometimes for the sake of sanity you just have to smile and let things go
In the next few months I will be starting the clinical years at the hospitals. I am grateful that I have watched this video before it starts. Thank you dr. Mike for making this video! It informed me enough how to adapt and to deal with people at the hospitals, especially the doctors, the residents, and other medical stuffs so at least I am a little bit prepared! Keep doing a great job!
I’m a 3rd year pre med student and I have a similar experience with the doctor I scribe for. If I ever misspell a word or don’t know the answer to one of his questions his go to response is “wow you really don’t know anything yet.” Instead of teaching me something in a positive way it is always very demeaning. Thank you for this video
Woot for Verbal Judo!
VOTE FOR NAZI'S
Verbal Judo.... Nice!! Working in a tense work environment, I usually get in these kind of argumentative situations and that makes me either angry or sad. I'd like to try this method 🙂👍
DAB ON WIZ KHALIFA
I dont use to comment but can we just talk about that he's a Doctor and he makes videos at the same time? Like, he make a chance to made us know about medical knowledge, when he can use all that time with his patients or to his personal life... You are amazing! This really help, keep going dr. Mike also thank you because you always kind and positive!
Those were the kinds of behaviors from veteran teachers I had work with and learn from as a first year teacher. I did get burned out and left after 3 years. Thank you for making this video.
Thank you! I really needed this; I received a D on my midterm today (a B student in the class) and I was really beating myself over the fact that I could have studied more or focused more in class instead of getting frustrated with the teacher or her teaching style. Your video video really motivated me to do better next semester, and have a more positive mindset.
Verbal Judo FTW!!!
As someone that teaches, I want to thank you for taking the time to reflect on yourself. I just gave back grades and had two students (out of 70) verbally attacked me for the grade not being fair. I brought them through the brief, their work, and the rubric to explain their score and they still tried to blame the word count or worse said that I didn't know what I was talking about. It is frustrating for a teacher when they see a student doing poorly. We honestly do care about your scores as much as you do...but we can't give scores that are not deserved...that's not fair to the students that produced amazing work. So if you are struggling with your course, go and talk to your teacher! 9/10 they will want to help you do better!
As a high school teacher this is quite helpful. Thanks!
Absolutely. The worst is when someone demeans you in front of a patient. I have found in my own practice as an RN is that folks like this feel really bad about themselves. You have to meet them where they're at. It is so hard especially in a clinical setting, where a senior medical professional has the power to fail or fire you. There have been time when I have cried walking down the street in my scrubs, but these instances are so helpful for personal growth. You may not remember when someone did a procedure perfectly, but you will always remember how someone treats you. Be kind to new people and coach them to be better than you, this is what bosses like the most and this is what gets you promoted, not being a jerk.
Thanks for this post doctor Mike. My hubby is a floor manager and he deals with harsh criticism from customers on a daily basis. I have shared this on his Facebook page to help motivate him.
Dr mike can u please do an episode on diets.
Craig h Pretty sure he already did
He did ? Can u tell me which video?
Ok
I appreciate you sharing that story Dr. Mike
This is why you succeed in life! Your positive outlook! I have to train my brain to think this way instead of beating myself up for failures.
I worked for a podiatrist who constantly humiliated me in front of patients, even going as far as throwing a chart at me as we walked out of a patient’s room. He was so soft spoken and sweet to patients. I admired his work, him and his knowledge. I would wake up with a knot in my stomach and dread in my heart each day. I did much of this “charitable thinking” as I completed my internship there. I told myself the reason he was so hard on me was because he saw potential in me. I actually took a job with him and that’s when his wife, the office manager pulled me aside and told me that he was diagnosed with colon cancer. The moral of the story... think the best of people, just like Dr. Mike says. Everyone has their own personal battles that they have to fight. This doctor had a heavy load to carry and the truth is that after my 3rd year working with him, he told me that he was hard on me because so many people have left him. His past partnership and employee loss had made him defensive. He thanked me for sticking it out with him.
This is an amazing topic! Thanks for the advice. :)
WE ARE BEING TURNED INTO MUSLIMS
I literally adore you. You seem like an amazing human being. I respect all doctors and my passion is medicine. Hopefully I can become a surgeon and help people like you do. You are so motivational and you truly inspire me. Thank you for creating such amazing content. From England 🏴❤️
Can i just say thank you for putting this one up. Im dealing with harsh criticism for a very long time and now i have found a way to handle the situation. De-escalate it, like you said.
I study journalism and I can recall a humiliating moment when my professor/editor trashed my article in front of the whole class... It broke my spirit but after a pep talk from my friends and family, I decided to power through since what you said, was right! Harsh criticism is all around us so we need to take it with a grain of salt. My GPA did suffer last semester as a result of the incident so I'm determined to kick ass this semester! Thanks Dr. Mike :)
When I saw the words " *Harsh Criticism* " my first thought was school.
The Husky pillow had my attention for the first half of the video 😂😂
Aww I miss Roxy!
This is SUPER important. Harsh criticism, bordering on verbal abuse, is rampant in veterinary medicine as well (and, unfortunately, so are mental illness and suicide). While some senior DVMs are excellent mentors, others seem obsessed with maligning their younger colleagues to maintain the power hierarchy.
I'm glad I watched this video at the right time, it helps me a lot because recently I started my internship in a hotel (hello I'm a tourism student) and that's true, sometimes the people who are supposed to teach you how to work in the field they have the worst comments/ attitude and usually they make you feel down without a reason ;( but the solution is to think positive, focusing on what will help you learn.
Thanks so much Dr. Mike I really appreciate it ;D
People should focus more on what people do correct than what they don’t. Unfortunately most people don’t.
BTW love your IKA expert interview
Wow this video actually really brightened my mood
Unoriginal User thank you for your amazing support :)
@@bobateaaa_7959 No problem anytime :)
Truth! You also need to understand that there are people that love to wallow in negativity. Nothing you say or do will be right. So focus on what's right for you and not on their actions or reactions. 🙂
i wish more people would be as mature as Dr.Mike
I like to go for the throat chop method. Shuts em up REAL quick
Lmao!! My kinda girl. I always wished I was more eloquent, but the world can always use us feisty people, too. ;)
Thanks Doc! I needed to hear that!
Im a 4th year nursing student and I have definitely run into these personalities along the way and I know there are more to come, which interfered with my learning. Thank you for sharing your experience! I will definitely be using the charity thinking in the future :)
As a medical assistant I get this from my doctor I work for a lot more then I should. It's unfortunate that there are people out to make sure all your "failures" have light shined on them i front of your peers then talking to you in private to make sure it doesn't happen again. But this is the world we live in now. People not just doctors you work for will always make you fall just make them self's feel better. Thank you for all your post. Hope there are more doctors out there like you then the one I work for now.
This came at a great time. I'm going back to school for a new career path after almost 10 years of being out of school for my old career path so this is great! Also I didn't know if you had any thoughts on DBT, some of what you said in the video reminds me of elements of that.
As crude as the context is, "prescription for knowledge" sounds like a really good line _out_ of context.
Failure of teaching style, not learning style. I know what I know and I admit what don't know. I do not tolerate being called out in front of patients or other staff when the criticism is in a humiliating style. I'll walk away until we can have a useful conversation. This has worked well and I have gained more knowledge and respect from physicians and peers.
If people where like Mike, in any field, our society would be a better place. Criticism is bad, constructive criticism is good.