EMOTIONAL FLASHBACKS AND CPTSD: MANAGING COMPLEX PTSD

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  • čas přidán 11. 07. 2024
  • LINK FREE CHECKLIST: DOES MY PARENT HAVE BORDERLINE OR NARCISSISTIC TRAITS?
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    drkimsage.thinkific.com/
    Emotional Flashbacks are emotional regressions where we return psychologically, back to times in childhood, when we felt overwhelmed, panicked, anxious, scared, sad, shame-filled, or even trapped, or angry.
    Once an Emotional Flashback hits us, we can become lost in the emotion(s), yet often not realize we are in the midst of an emotional flashback.
    Those of us who grew up with difficult parents and/or losses, traumas, experiences, etc...develop certain survival strategies to deal with our childhoods.
    One main strategy revolves around using perfectionism, in an effort to get it right, to get our needs met, to stay safe, to avoid toxic shame, abandonment or unsafe experiences. However, there is no such thing as being perfect, it is an illusion, an attempt at controlling the uncontrollable: life.
    So, we begin to develop our own internal and external critics, who are often below the surface, cloaked in toxic shame and fear. These inner critics, in their effort to achieve and create perfection, can be triggered in adulthood and can emotionally hijack us, often without our conscious awareness.
    This video explores the nature of emotional flashbacks as the "Amygdala Hijackings" and deeply triggering old childhood states which they are-- and describes 3 steps we can take to help ourselves get out of these flashbacks, and safely and quickly back into our safer, powerful adult selves.
    ❤️❤️❤️❤️Getting into our feelings, our body and head are described as 3 steps you can take to handle emotional flashbacks, and to lovingly get out of an emotional flashback, and back into your conscious awareness, so you can get on with living your life, as a healed and whole human being.❤️❤️❤️❤️
    xo
    @drkimsage
    www.drkimsage.com
    VIDEOS REFERRED TO IN THIS VIDEO:
    "I AM BAD"
    • BORDERLINE MOMS: HEA...
    "UNDERSTANDING BORDERLINE"
    • BORDERLINE MOMS: WHAT...
    👏👏👏👏Images from Unsplash by: 🙏🏻🙏🏻
    Zach Kadolph
    Aarón Blanco Tejedor
    Anthony Tran
    🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻Music by: Amoeba Crew on AudioJungle

Komentáře • 74

  • @stacyalmeida8104
    @stacyalmeida8104 Před 3 lety +27

    Before this I really thought I had some super power. How could I detect peoples behavior and danger before knowing anything

    • @DrKimSage
      @DrKimSage  Před 3 lety +9

      Yes, we become so good at reading everything, even when we don't know we are doing it!

    • @mrararatovich
      @mrararatovich Před rokem +5

      OMG... I'm broken, and it's good news, actually.

    • @o8anobliildona8o
      @o8anobliildona8o Před rokem +5

      Gavin DeBeker The Gift Of Fear

  • @LadyInWhite741
    @LadyInWhite741 Před 2 lety +13

    Lately, what I’ve been dealing with is a short temper with my sweetheart of a husband. I get triggered by a certain way he says something or a influx of his voice a certain way or a tone. I just loose it on him and become just incredibly angry and start to loose control over my emotions. The odd thing is my husband noticed that I sound like my parents when I get in this state. Like exactly how they treated and talked to me. I do notice that before this happens, I am experiencing an big increase of intrusive thoughts and flash backs.
    What’s not helping matters is I’m 16 weeks pregnant and am unable to take my anxiety medication or anything to help. I’m 38 years old and still can’t cope at times. I am extremely blessed to have my wonderfully supportive husband who has been by my side for almost a decade now. This is our first child and we are thrilled. I’ve come a very long way with my CPTSD. I’ll be ok, just need to work out a few kinks before my daughter arrives.

  • @daniellecharming
    @daniellecharming Před 3 lety +25

    I feel fatigued all the time, just in an emotional way.. this is so validating. Thanks Dr Sage, and a very happy Mother's Day to you from the bottom of my heart 💜💜💜

  • @ocypodequadrata
    @ocypodequadrata Před 3 lety +11

    My wife used to say I would seem like a 3 year old when I freaked out. I’ve heard myself repeat phrases I used to as a small child when I get upset. I always thought I was just stunted, but a regression seems so much more accurate! I’ve only been recently diagnosed but finally there’s resources that actually make sense!

  • @kimberlydavis5034
    @kimberlydavis5034 Před rokem +7

    I have complex-ptsd, major depression, anxiety and ocd. I have to take medications every day and every night. I also have a counselor, mental health caseworker. It doesn't cure what I have and never will, but medications and counseling makes it bearable even though it's a daily struggle and fight for me.

  • @maureenseel118
    @maureenseel118 Před rokem +5

    Recovering from C-PTSD now... This video is super helpful.

  • @xiosaturnsmoons1691
    @xiosaturnsmoons1691 Před rokem +3

    You are an Angel in earth! ❤
    For all the adults now that still trying to heal our inner child. I never understood why suddenly I had all this out of control overwhelming feeling specially when just as you explain, the house being a mess and feeling like my life is falling apart and I am not good enough. Then I feel like I wanna scream and I get super irritated. I never understood why I felt like reviving again the emotions I felt when I was a little girl when I got hurt emotionally and physically. Going from the fear, and sadness to the anger and not being able to explain exactly. Yes I know my PTSD is bad but is more because is CPTSD and nobody told me about emotional flashbacks. Now everything makes sense why suddenly I don’t feel great anymore or why I am stuck in this past event emotion again, I was like feeling getting crazy and out of control.

  • @lisamiyamoto6509
    @lisamiyamoto6509 Před rokem +3

    Omg! Have you been to my house when I get off work? Lol this situation is sooo triggering for me. And I know it, but I struggle with not owning the shame failure guilt I’m such a bad girl feeling. It feels so true at the time. I’m so exhausted after a 12 hour shift as a nurse, that I usually just break down. I love this video. It is so practical. I am crawling out of bed now to go start the thanksgiving day using this technique you shared. Thank you. I am grateful for wise women like you! Blessings!

  • @lunenski
    @lunenski Před rokem +4

    oh finally!! an explanation for what I thought were my panic attacks, thank you, truly! I was starting to feel insane with these reoccurring reactions to what would seem like trivial adversities in life... after a good amount of years of dealing with anxiety-ridden/depressive episodes, which I learned how to get through or ignore efficiently (out of practicality), it feels so relieving to find information about what might actually be the reason of said depression/anxiety! I wasn't just "born that way". Thank you for letting my brain glimpse at a possible solution/answer...

  • @AnotherYou93
    @AnotherYou93 Před 3 lety +16

    Subscribed!! I hope you can get the subscribers you deserve soon~ Love your video.
    I have so many childhood trauma that I've tried to forget. my families are the people who give me the most traumatic experiences, so whenever I have an issue with them, it triggered me and give flashbacks to all of the things I want to forget.
    Watching you is like having friends I never had who give me pats on my head. I feel like finally, someone understood me

  • @ZhangWenting
    @ZhangWenting Před 8 měsíci +1

    It worked and I started crying. Thank you sooooo much Dr Sage ❤❤❤

  • @LOVE_ALL_AROUND
    @LOVE_ALL_AROUND Před 4 měsíci

    Wow. Thank you! Now I understand why I have these. I feel like I am not myself. This happens a few times a week. Now I know what to work with.

  • @carmenkoen7315
    @carmenkoen7315 Před rokem +3

    You are a life saver. Thank you for being so kind and thoughtful

  • @vtbhoward
    @vtbhoward Před rokem +3

    Sweet and to the point.....
    I am wondering if you would be so kind to consider using more high frequency music, like classical (with violins or so) for the intro and ending moments. They can really add a sense of calm for many, maybe not most.
    I appreciate the support to greater healing still!

  • @viktorija4485
    @viktorija4485 Před 3 lety +6

    So helpful, thanks a lot! Dealing with CPTSD and healing I know practically all about symptoms, but I'm searching for thins kind of solution of current emotional flasback a long time. I've already learned recognizing the feelings, but its not enough for dealing with a state of abandoned child. So next steps are really crucial for me!

  • @rickp.6251
    @rickp.6251 Před rokem +6

    Everyone be quiet daddy's home. Sounds of gravel in the driveway, car door closes... what will come through the door. Huffing puffing and cursing or a smiling face?

    • @wildpupadventures
      @wildpupadventures Před rokem +2

      Omg. You are describing my experience too!

    • @kathidau2869
      @kathidau2869 Před rokem +1

      @@wildpupadventures Mine too! I could hear his truck coming wayyyyyy down the road, cause I knew what was coming, after coming through the back door. My mom would immediately tell him lies, which he believed, and he would abuse us accordingly.

  • @johnhanlen9498
    @johnhanlen9498 Před 2 měsíci +1

    I’m interested in characteristics of narcissistic parents, each one; childhood cPTSD and empathy; INFJ and narcissistic abuse.

  • @yourenough3
    @yourenough3 Před 3 lety

    This channel is so helpful. So useful. Thank you!

  • @daniellelearnsstuff
    @daniellelearnsstuff Před 10 měsíci +2

    I'm reading Pete Walker's book and this explains SO much of my life. Thankyou Kim

  • @mirihase4684
    @mirihase4684 Před 3 lety +1

    Thank you so so so much! Your videos are helping a lot, you can’t imagine! 🥺♥️

  • @paulyadav2288
    @paulyadav2288 Před 2 lety

    You are amazing and I have watched a few of your videos and then subscribed.

  • @wordsthatbrighten1035
    @wordsthatbrighten1035 Před rokem +1

    Thank you so much for your videos. I love the way you deliver your videos in a calm, peaceful way.

  • @clairepaulineharvey286
    @clairepaulineharvey286 Před 3 lety +2

    Thank you for this 💛

  • @zeidmuhammad8206
    @zeidmuhammad8206 Před 2 lety +1

    Thank you for this video

  • @melbbb5673
    @melbbb5673 Před 2 lety +3

    Thank you. I have been working on issues for a long time. You provide easy and actionable things that will definitely help when the old feelings come up.

  • @ronalddeem8154
    @ronalddeem8154 Před 3 lety +2

    Thank you

  • @shonaryer1778
    @shonaryer1778 Před 2 lety +1

    Your videos are really helping me shed light on my experiences and self. Thank you so much 💜 It feels great to be able to relate to what you say and understand properly. X

  • @suzanneethier1450
    @suzanneethier1450 Před měsícem

    you are a blessing thank you

  • @mrararatovich
    @mrararatovich Před rokem

    It's amazing. You're amazing.

  • @lizziejean1218
    @lizziejean1218 Před rokem +4

    Thank you SO much for this! I finally figured out I was experiencing emotional flashbacks and needed some guidance for what to do about them. This is incredibly helpful ❤️

  • @heynow2722
    @heynow2722 Před 3 lety +2

    Love this, i need practical tips like this

  • @lf30456
    @lf30456 Před 5 měsíci

    Dr Sage, you are amazing ! I have struggled all my adult life with this inner fight. Thank you for helping make sense and giving me the tools to fight back 💪🏼

  • @rodquinpaisajismo3819
    @rodquinpaisajismo3819 Před 3 lety +2

    Great video!!!

  • @tracyvanvugt9806
    @tracyvanvugt9806 Před 3 lety +3

    Very helpful tools. Thank you! 🌸

  • @barbpace-lamb
    @barbpace-lamb Před rokem +1

    Your info is awesome! I knew something was weird with my up bringing and now I know I was right. Thanks. XOXOXOX

  • @waxestlowa732r6
    @waxestlowa732r6 Před rokem

    Thank You!

  • @LessThanThree76
    @LessThanThree76 Před rokem +1

    So - identify the feeling, then distract yourself by doing something else, that will push the initial feeling down?! Got it! 👍

  • @jamesgorman7846
    @jamesgorman7846 Před rokem

    Best explanation of this state/s ( of mine/...ours?) I have heard explained.

  • @happygucci5094
    @happygucci5094 Před 5 měsíci

    This just happened to me at work today. I work in an exploitative work environment- where the onus of responsibility and culpability is unfairly loaded onto the ( replaceable ) worker- this woman’s tone reminded me EXACTLY like my Mom. Who is very sick and I am beyond my breaking point. This woman tone took me right back to my Mother- feeling worthless, nothing is ever good enough, have to be perfect, have to be perfect have to be PERFECT- and if I’m not- it’s my fault. I’m the problem. I’m the bad person. And my job and life is of no consequence.
    ( can you tell me that I am emotionally flooded right now?🥹😬😔🤦🏽‍♀️)
    This was so needed.

  • @iskeipizm
    @iskeipizm Před rokem

    thank u so much

  • @carmenkoen7315
    @carmenkoen7315 Před rokem

    U save me every time

  • @archie-dl1dl
    @archie-dl1dl Před 8 měsíci +1

    i have to stay in my hyper paranoid state at all times i have become dependant on it

  • @gojiberry7201
    @gojiberry7201 Před 10 měsíci

    I recently went no contact with my parents (I am an enmeshed daughter). I do keep feeling like I have these episodes where I actually regress to a very young age. The weirdest one was when I suddenly felt panicked in my body, and an image of my mom appeared in my mind, but she had her hairstyle from the 80s instead of current. It took me off guard and was very unsettling. I'm starting EMDR today, so I hope over time this will help as well.

  • @Mr.Sidenote
    @Mr.Sidenote Před rokem +2

    I've had a couple of experiences where an ex would be picking and nagging me to the point that I became so overwhelmed that I started sobbing like a child. It took me right back to my foster mom (my primary abuser). It surprised me to find myself in that state emotionally, but I immediately understood why because I recognized that feeling all too well and who caused it. Thanks for the tip about what an ideal parent would say, doctor. I do practice breathing techniques and getting active when I'm feeling panicked and it helps. Are there tools to handle those feelings when I'm not in the actual moment? What can I work on to reduce or prevent future emotional outbursts or feelings of emotional overload? I'd also be interested to hear your thoughts on empaths and "people pleasers" absorbing negative energy from others around us.

    • @vivere__
      @vivere__ Před 11 měsíci +1

      What has helped me to not take on somebody else's energy is to pause a moment and remember to stay in my own power. In your own separate body and stay 'grounded'. It is hard sometimes yes. Another method is to imagine a flame within you, your own beautiful light that radiates outward. You can create your own space of strength within you

  • @Touay.
    @Touay. Před 2 měsíci

    Thanks for the video. Is there an alternative to the 'give yourself love and support - like a good parent' aspect of this? I find that really triggering ....
    I think maybe it is a reminder that I have no idea what a loving parent would say...
    Even when meditating to calm myself, if I try and visualise a calm relaxing scenario, I will dissociate as it feels threatening.

  • @ants_feg319
    @ants_feg319 Před 2 měsíci

    I had an older brother who emotionally physically and verbally abused me every day till I was 16 never thought of it as abuse till my wife told me but I show many ASD signs after listening to your videos I'm confused about where to go for help

  • @suzanneethier1450
    @suzanneethier1450 Před měsícem

    all the above

  • @CplBaker
    @CplBaker Před rokem

    I get anxiety when looking at an emotional wheel mostly because I don't really understand personally what they are or how they feel, but I can sure intellectually describe them all day.

  • @user-tt4xe6vs8p
    @user-tt4xe6vs8p Před 3 měsíci

    I watch this because i know victims don't recover. I can't let my childhood define my adult life

  • @natalietadros980
    @natalietadros980 Před 10 měsíci +2

    Please, never stop making videos 🥺

  • @user-lb8qd2bb1e
    @user-lb8qd2bb1e Před 2 měsíci

    I’ve been dealing with CPSD, since birth, I could not understand why she, so called mother, how could she have hated me so badly??

  • @danaayalaillouz8826
    @danaayalaillouz8826 Před 3 lety +1

    hi thank u for the video' i have a question : you said that i should tell myself" this is an old emotion that belong to my past" the point is ' that i have never in my childhood felt so terrible feelings and emotions that i'm feeling now when im overwhelmed.
    when i have this overwhelmed states, i feel i cant be inside my own body , i feel i want to run away from my body, i feel despair extreme stress and shame and more untolerated feelings. and when i was a child i have never felt like that . so why to tell to myself that this emotion and feeling belong to my past? thank u

  • @NRGvideoproduction
    @NRGvideoproduction Před 3 lety +2

    Can you make more reparenting videos? Thank you

  • @leighsoontiraratn8577
    @leighsoontiraratn8577 Před rokem +1

    I feel so much of what your saying but don't know how or I just can't ask for help when I have my partner just attacks and doesn't help I withdraw as you say I know it's not good but

  • @londonsounds6212
    @londonsounds6212 Před 11 měsíci

    Please please can you help me?
    I have had a problem for so much of my life and I don't know what it is.
    My life is split in 2, my happy years before my dad died and then my sad life after he died.
    The problem I'm having is sometimes I recall a conversation with someone or an event from the good or bad years very vividly and it leaves me feeling the exact same emotion I was feeling. I remember these events in a very detailed way and I end up feeling sad or like I wish I had justice when these things happened 20 years ago.
    My brain is stuck in the past
    I dont know if these are traditional flashbacks because they don't feel like they are happening at that moment and theyre not like a video playing on loop. I don't know if it's an emotional flashback either as I am aware of the event causing the emotion.
    It's basically an old event, not so much trauma based (although it was from an era of grief and trauma) and the event makes me feel sad and I dwell on it too much.
    Please do you know what I could read up on for this?
    Thank you so so so much ❤🙏

  • @thehappiness2741
    @thehappiness2741 Před 11 měsíci +1

    Does one signs of complex ptsd include mistrust in your family ?

  • @gregallen6463
    @gregallen6463 Před 3 lety +3

    So when your cognitive abilities and emotional reasoning has been hi-jacked how are you supposed to remember to walk through these steps? This seems more applicable to mild anxiety.

    • @Elya08
      @Elya08 Před 2 lety +3

      If you’re able, find a therapist who knows about CPTSD and EMDR. I found the repetitive and consistent reminders each week eventually made the helpful steps to pull me out of or at least recognize when I’m having an emotional flashback.
      Also, EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique - aka Tapping) is useful to help with anxiety and help heal limiting beliefs.

  • @ultravioletindigosoulconne3320

    doc how and where can i scream
    i really need to scream

  • @irisviel_Einzbern
    @irisviel_Einzbern Před 7 měsíci

    Is it emotional flashback when as an adult when you are near home or visit parents, when you haven't even entered the house but you feel anxious, and need to run away

    • @happygucci5094
      @happygucci5094 Před 5 měsíci +1

      I would say absolutely- I experience this. And I have CPTSD… ( I am not a professional therapist- just a fellow survivor)

  • @marceladelfino8544
    @marceladelfino8544 Před rokem

    When you said "How talk to you a loving parent" ...me: NO IDEA...but it calms me a lot the word you use, but wasn't enough..so...my suggestion...why not do a video just with this frases to calm our inner child? Is an idea

  • @archie-dl1dl
    @archie-dl1dl Před 8 měsíci

    i have one terifying nightmare every night to keep me validated

  • @Izkapts
    @Izkapts Před 2 lety +2

    Hello! I have a trauma related to violence towards animals. I am afraid to go to a therapist because they might have, for example, leather shoes. I know that would make my mind show scenes of how the animal's throat is cut and the skin from their dead body is torn away. I understand that it is not happening right now but things like that communicate indifference towards violence and I find it very difficult to deal with it. Most of the time when I raise the issue people don't care because such brutality is socially normalized. Any advice?

  • @azuza123456
    @azuza123456 Před rokem

    Hear me out, what if "bpd mood instability" is just emotional flashbacks.

  • @suzanneethier1450
    @suzanneethier1450 Před měsícem

    woiw