I used to have a lot of maladaptive daydreaming to go out of reality.We were locked up in a small room for hours until our parents came back from work and then we got greeted with yelling and beating because we did something what would bored kids do draw something.Now i understand ll Its all set up around feeling safe or creating safety.I don't know if i should be thankful that i was abused because now i can predict peoples behavior and avoid escalation of situations or i should be angry that i have all these issues.
It's a wicked horrible cycle. Avoidance has been my life. Loud noises. Shopping centres. Sex on TV. Slamming doors. The smell of beer. I live in my kitchen. I can't sit in my lounge. Started therapy a few weeks ago I think it's ramping things up for me. Flashbacks, emotional and the other....so horrible
Is it better to confront the events of the past to understand them ? I don't know. I remember one session with a psychologists many, many years ago. I was that...upset, scared, fearful, I don't know the correct word. That I drove my car like an idiot on a road that I had driven hundreds of times. I remember thinking, this is a s shape bend with a jump on the exit that can be done at about 50 mph, I was doing 90 mph. The car was a write off but luckily no one was injured. I believe it was connected to the session I had had with the Psychologists not 15 minutes before, talking about childhood memories.
I tend to do all 4 of the F's depending on situation. Unfortunately when I freeze it seems to other person I don't care and feel no emotions and I am a souless person that needs basically stop wasting space. I feel so much, I go numb to block and try to protect myself. I want and try hard to explain but the proper words get stuck inside me.
Thank you. I have been avoiding going out and keeping my room dark. And it’s gotten worse I think now that I don’t go to work. I was looking for what was wrong with me. This video really helped.
I am sitting here, so frustrated after hearing the phrase that confronting our fears weakens them / this may be true in some cases, or with some people, however, with people like me, I find that panic attacks that seemingly come out of nowhere and are hard for me to explain to myself, cause me to put myself down brutally forever. Each new panic attack is another reason to strongly dislike a part of myself and question why an otherwise normal healthy person would have this type of cruel reaction. I’m in my mid 60s now and have done meditation, yoga, purely holistic, diet, raw diet, exercise, neuro biology, talk therapy, cognitive therapy, hypnosis, and this has been an ongoing quest in my life - to rid myself of panic attacks. I have never ever once lost the fear or weakened the fear of anything I have tried to confront, rather it, just deepens the contempt I have for that part of myself since I can’t make sense of it. Hearing you tell me how I should feel Makes it worse as if I am some type of a freak. I’m so tired of these platitudes and sayings and phrases that are supposed to get you somewhere. Thankfully, I am happily married and I don’t have any drug or alcohol problems and I am working constantly on self forgiveness for just having panic attacks. You may want to rethink telling EVERYONE that confronting your fears weakens them. I will add that cognitive therapy has been the most helpful of all of the previously mentioned modalities. I have the great book called when panic attacks and have to do some lengthy processes here and there to get through things. I send prayers to anyone else struggling with CPTSD.💐
I found peace in the Lord Jesus Christ. I made a complete surrender to God's will and my panic attacks relented. The surrender was completely genuine because I knew in my heart I couldn't go on of my own accord. Nearest thing to a "Footprints in the sand" moment as you'll ever see. I pray you seek his help and find his mercy.
@@patriotpizzaman thank you…I liked hearing your story although I have been a practicing Christian my whole life. Live right / take care of others and lean towards the humanitarian way of life. It doesn’t seem to have any effect / prayers go unanswered regarding panic- though I don’t lose faith. Some people tell me to garden - some say psychedelics ( drugs) some say medication. To each his own and I’m happy you have found peace- accepting God and Christ / prayer etc has not changed a thing for me when it comes to panic.
I had been thinking of doing that, and your comment gave me the push I needed. I just added a new video of me reading a bit of the novel Siddhartha - by Hermann Hesse.
Absolutely brilliant. I've recently been diagnosed with cPTSD and the information here has made me more confident in that diagnosis. Hyper-vigilence is me through and through. That's what happens when you grow up with an abusive alcoholic I guess!
I go through all the F's every time my boyfriend unintentionally triggers my cptsd. First I get angry and Fight, but then feeling his anger I start fawning in hopes to get rid of his anger, when that doesn't work I freeze and dissociate for the rest of the argument. If the argument continues I usually end up in Flight and physically run away. its exhausting
I was walking through Home Depot light bulbs on display were crackling and I stopped immediately because it triggered a flashback but it was a happy flashback I even had a smile on my face but I couldn't place the event I couldn't figure out where it was from and I stood there wanting to know what I was trying to remember there was no memory to it it was just a happy reflection of something
Thank you for this helpful information. I really enjoyed the images you chose, the softness in your voice and the calm, peaceful expressions on the faces of the subjects of the paintings. You've clearly allowed your audience to inform your presentation style. I appreciate this, and imagine that it will help in serving others.
This waz a really great video that put my personal issues because of CPTSD into words in a way that I haven't been able to for a long time, glad that I found it
This is one of the best videos I have come across in regard to the symptoms you mentioned. Very well explained and without a doubt will help many understand what is happening for them and why. God bless you ❤️
This is now my fourth time trying to listen to this. I have fallen asleep each time LOL not because the continent was an interesting but because your voice is so relaxing :-)
Notation is a tremendously powerful technique. Training yourself to have a new response to moments of distress and flashback in which you notate what set you off. It works for dieting. It works for cigarettes. And it works in ptsd by making you have a second, helpfully contraditory and introspective response to the things that bother you
Until and it was only recently, I started to look into cPTSD, all because of a 5 day affair with a psychologist. Almost everything I read explains my life, emotions, reactions and relationships, personal and work. I'm 57 and still feel fear when I hear people laugh, that will probably explain why I walked out of a comedians stage show many years ago. Just felt.....threatened. I'm glad cPTSD is being taken more seriously.
Really appreciate this video. Thank you. 💙 Discovering Pete Walker and the cptsd framework has been really life changing for me, de-pathologizing my lense of self to a certain extent. when you talked about psychological constriction I started sparking off as you do when you hear something IMPORTANT. The author you quoted, was that Judith Herman?
I'm so thrilled to have found your channel!! I wanted to take a moment to commend you for a job well done & encourage you to continue creating content. I'm finally ready to focus more on healing from my past than understanding my abusers. The later was essential to my healing as well but I feel a shift has taken place. I did 2yrs of EMDR therapy that was truly life changing. Without that, I probably wouldn't have ever known that there is a name for what I was going through bc there isn't a lot of good info readily available on C-PTSD. I'm not sure what has prevented you from creating more content. Perhaps you are struggling with something personal or you simply chose to take a long break? 🤷 Whatever the case may be for you, I hope that it won't become a permanent obstacle to what you've started here. There are thousands of people (me included 🙋) who need to hear what you have to say & there's no other channel quite like this. Not to mention, you have a calming, soothing voice that your followers enjoy hearing 😉 Please come back! Be blessed. Be well. Namasté 🙏 💕🕊️🌞
Thank you. I like your spot-on content and your calm, concise presentation style. Would like to learn a bit about yourself and your sources. Subscibed.
Thank you so much. i just discovered your channel today and idk why you don't have more subscribers yet. subscribing, liking, commenting and sharing as much as possible. as soon as i'm in a better financial situation i'll be donating on Patreon as well. thank you.
Mindblowing content. Thank u! Cold showers is what helped me to reduce the reactivity to the flasbacks. Learning to turn off ur FFF stress response in a controled environment (the cold shower) is a game changer. Its gives u that split second pause to bring ur awareness on line and understand where ur reaction is actually coming from.
I love culture too, but then I remembered whenever I had to breathe that fast when I was hyperventilating from being gaslit so hard. I was a super sad day whenever I realized I couldn’t take cold showers, but I worked it out. I take them all the time.
I wrote this recently trying to explain to someone...doubt they read it but I would like to share it: The unbearable internal pain that is so intense with hurt, it causes numbness. Starting the vicious cycle that I am trying to put the brakes on to go in a different direction towards a beautiful light...that shines on darkness. But that bright light shows the pain in the open..wanting to go back to the dark where it's safe with the knowing it can hide from everything. Causing more pain to the one you trusted and love..but not wanting to give up...hoping and praying they don't give up at all. My ever tormenting pain is winning giving me my queue to drive into the dark horizon...
4 years ago....this is beautifully, sadly written -expressed. It sure does hurt to not feel heard, and while I hope that the person to who you've sent this, read it, I can tell you that I did. It resonates for me and I heard you today. Hoping you're in a place where the light shines more brightly, more often, and thanking you for sharing this piece of art.
really helpful and at great pace and softness. thanks! I have cptsd but i struggle to understand if i am avoiding social gatherings due to cptsd or my introverted character.... i really dont feel comfortable in those settings and just want to leave. ill guess thats another thing to work with my therapist on :) thanks again
I did face my fears a lot but it never got me anywhere. What i belive know is that I was so distant from everything, like a robot, so I didnt learn. Know I try to expose myself and be more in the present.
Thank you, simply brilliantly helpful to me to listen to this. Seeing the paintings helps also. So grateful also to Pete Walker for his books and music. I am an adult who freezes when triggered. Most recently by my elderly mother telling me she could have had a great career if I hadn't been born so I should cooperate and be grateful not feel anger or hurt. Reminds me of being 6 years old and hearing her tell me she wishes she never had children. I think now it was due to her own childhood trauma she could never be emotionally present or understanding to a child, instead only (unintentionally / subconsciously?) emotionally abusive and neglectful. I see her repeating this now with her grandchildren so I protect them from her. I think she is Fight type, my sibling flee and fawn , I freeze and have developed an autoimmune disease. Flashbacks mean I sometimes struggle to be present with my own loving children and husband while I learn ways to recover.
So true I'm so glad I had this experience so I can fix me to. I never knew how damaged I'am on the emotionally side. Mine was stress induced but thank God I have been digging deep and learning healing and moving forward. So many changes ahead. Complex trauma just wow never even heard of it till a week ago I never felt abused as a child after 52 yrs I've admitted I was abused now it wasn't abused its trauma eye opening to say the least. Good luck and prayers to all.
This is so me that it is so sad. I cried listening to this. I wish my therapist could understand any of this. She refused to help me by reading Allen walker's book saying that she is the Dr and I can't be the one directing the therapy... I have been In these useless cbt sessions which leaves me in horrible state days after each session. When I try to analyze why I get certain reactions and connects them to my past. She stops me saying why you are relieving the past and not in the here and now. According to ptsd brain scans WE CANat this part of the brain is shunned down.. It needs different approaches to start rewiring the brain down again.. Including emdr and other therapies that connects the body to the brain.. I tried to hold myself from showing her this because she is nice and I don't want to come out as offensive or know it all. But I felt handicapped because I could do that no matter how many times she tells to live in the here and now. So I showed her the parts in the book with the scans.. But I guess she was offended. I don't care about being right or knowledgeable.. I just want to heal... But how can I when I need help.. But all the therapists find me offensive when I show that I have more knowledge about my condition than them and ask for a certain type of therapy.. The complex ptsd from thriving to surviving. Now she wants to treat me as a person but not with a diagnosis. Though this book literally describes my life.. It seems like she didn't know what is my diagnosis so she wants to treat me in the here and now because she doesn't know much about cptsd and doesn't have time to read the damn book. Which I told her it is literally me and I need help trying its method.
Holy cow you deserve a better therapist. There ARE good, trauma informed specialist out there, and many of them have sliding scales to make their appointments more accessible. This therapist is further harming you, please do the work to find a better one. It took me half a year of dedicated work to find mine, but it was SO WORTH IT and lifechanging.
please try a different therapist, you absolutely should be in the front seat of therapy, you're doing the healing and the work, they are the facilitator, shouldn't be a power play,
I was in therapy years ago and it inflamed my cptsd..... I had major flashbacks. It was before Pete walkers book. She diagnosed me with PTSD and did some eye work ect but it didn’t really help. After 18 months of being triggered I vowed never to go back to therapy. Cptsd describes my symptoms perfectly. I would definitely work with a Therapist to work with Pete walkers method. Pls find one that does. I have seen many now I’ve started looking.
I like the hyper vigilant scanning. I’ll take a small dose of psychedelic mushrooms and sit in a public place like a bar and just fixate internally on this magnificent awareness of what everyone else is thinking and feeling. The shrooms remove essentially all of my anxiety and what’s left is just this highly refined skill and the feeling of being content experiencing it in action. It’s kind of taboo to recommend drugs but I highly recommend the experience.
That’s a lovely painting of the WW1 soldiers (in the kilt) but I feel that CPTSD should be considered separately from wartime PTSD. The latter is easy to understand. The key element to factor in is size. Life experience. When you are little, even small upsets have a proportionately larger impact. And big events have a massive impact. A child does not have the broader processing power - or agency of an adult. Though even for adults in WW1, agency was restricted. You got shot for ‘shell shock’. So, like a small dependent child, running away was not an option. Though I know someone who ran away when he was 10.
How can it be that flashback is nonstop for years?(just now realised that theere is such thing like PTS. I did not know I have it. I thought it happens from horrific head injuiry accidents only) But for me it was drowning and then medical mistake when I lost ability to breath and noone paid attention to it so I knew thats it I am going to die now and they don't even realise it. Like going on paralel with all other you do or see. I even can feel where exactly it is in head - right back area of head. And most strange is that iff previously that flashback was whole movie off event then suddenly it stucked on one small part from that "movie". And thats worst. It wasn't so bad when whole store reexperiencing because there was good end but now I stucked in before end on worst part in repite. What to do? My head will blowup.
I wonder why the "substance abuse risk" for flights is specifically uppers? I'm definitely a flight and I actively avoid uppers because they put me even more on edge. I take adhd meds every day but I strongly prefer anxiolytics and opiates, based on past experience
Thank you. I love your voice. You sound so deep and calm and sensitive. So intelligent and wise. Are you married? 🤭 that's just me wishing. Sending you love and hugs from the UK xxx
I work in the retention department for a major company. I handle 15 to 20 calls a day. I am required to make offers two customers who want to cancel. Sometimes this makes people angry, they raise their voice, they become agitated and aggressive. This triggers a lot of panic and anxiety as well as anger in me. If I have a too many cancels, I won’t make enough money to pay my bills.If I can’t pay my bills, I could lose my home because I’m in a chapter 13. This is not just a perception but a real possibility. I have the opportunity to make enough money to take care of some necessary repairs that need to be made to my home and car. I will stay here until I can afford to leave. In the meantime, how do I not let this damage my nerves even further?
Emotional flashbacks are called emotional for a reason. Stuff cud ve happened before u cud talk or remember cognitively..your analytical brain doesnt develop full till adolescence..hence its ur emotional brain that did all the recording..its called implicit memory that resides in our subconscious. The body keeps the score..is the book. When u get triggered its ur body that reacts not ur mind. Learning ways to cultivate the internal safety in ur body is the first step to healing.
I love you everybody , because you deserve it and because of your souls ♥️ keep going and live in the end of your wish fulfilled ... You can check out Neville Goddards teachings too they will transform you ❤️🙏🏻
I used to have a lot of maladaptive daydreaming to go out of reality.We were locked up in a small room for hours until our parents came back from work and then we got greeted with yelling and beating because we did something what would bored kids do draw something.Now i understand ll Its all set up around feeling safe or creating safety.I don't know if i should be thankful that i was abused because now i can predict peoples behavior and avoid escalation of situations or i should be angry that i have all these issues.
this
It's a wicked horrible cycle. Avoidance has been my life. Loud noises. Shopping centres. Sex on TV. Slamming doors. The smell of beer. I live in my kitchen. I can't sit in my lounge. Started therapy a few weeks ago I think it's ramping things up for me. Flashbacks, emotional and the other....so horrible
Is it better to confront the events of the past to understand them ?
I don't know.
I remember one session with a psychologists many, many years ago.
I was that...upset, scared, fearful, I don't know the correct word. That I drove my car like an idiot on a road that I had driven hundreds of times.
I remember thinking, this is a s shape bend with a jump on the exit that can be done at about 50 mph, I was doing 90 mph.
The car was a write off but luckily no one was injured.
I believe it was connected to the session I had had with the Psychologists not 15 minutes before,
talking about childhood memories.
sex on tv is huge for me. i knew something was off. i run
I tend to do all 4 of the F's depending on situation. Unfortunately when I freeze it seems to other person I don't care and feel no emotions and I am a souless person that needs basically stop wasting space. I feel so much, I go numb to block and try to protect myself. I want and try hard to explain but the proper words get stuck inside me.
Same
nunya biz I’m the exact way
Yes, I know that numb
Its dificult to accept that you probably never can describe to another person the hell of this sickness. But trying to do it frees up a lot as well.
Same, i tend to do all 4...
Thank you for validating who I am.
Peace kind friend 🙏
It’s effing horrible, I’m so sorry
Thank you. I have been avoiding going out and keeping my room dark. And it’s gotten worse I think now that I don’t go to work. I was looking for what was wrong with me. This video really helped.
I get tired trying to explain my situation. But thanks.
I like the way you explain the tendencies of fight, flight, freeze, and fawn types. Really simple and clear.
I am sitting here, so frustrated after hearing the phrase that confronting our fears weakens them / this may be true in some cases, or with some people, however, with people like me, I find that panic attacks that seemingly come out of nowhere and are hard for me to explain to myself, cause me to put myself down brutally forever. Each new panic attack is another reason to strongly dislike a part of myself and question why an otherwise normal healthy person would have this type of cruel reaction. I’m in my mid 60s now and have done meditation, yoga, purely holistic, diet, raw diet, exercise, neuro biology, talk therapy, cognitive therapy, hypnosis, and this has been an ongoing quest in my life - to rid myself of panic attacks. I have never ever once lost the fear or weakened the fear of anything I have tried to confront, rather it, just deepens the contempt I have for that part of myself since I can’t make sense of it. Hearing you tell me how I should feel Makes it worse as if I am some type of a freak. I’m so tired of these platitudes and sayings and phrases that are supposed to get you somewhere. Thankfully, I am happily married and I don’t have any drug or alcohol problems and I am working constantly on self forgiveness for just having panic attacks. You may want to rethink telling EVERYONE that confronting your fears weakens them. I will add that cognitive therapy has been the most helpful of all of the previously mentioned modalities. I have the great book called when panic attacks and have to do some lengthy processes here and there to get through things. I send prayers to anyone else struggling with CPTSD.💐
I found peace in the Lord Jesus Christ. I made a complete surrender to God's will and my panic attacks relented. The surrender was completely genuine because I knew in my heart I couldn't go on of my own accord. Nearest thing to a "Footprints in the sand" moment as you'll ever see. I pray you seek his help and find his mercy.
@@patriotpizzaman thank you…I liked hearing your story although I have been a practicing Christian my whole life. Live right / take care of others and lean towards the humanitarian way of life. It doesn’t seem to have any effect / prayers go unanswered regarding panic- though I don’t lose faith. Some people tell me to garden - some say psychedelics ( drugs) some say medication. To each his own and I’m happy you have found peace- accepting God and Christ / prayer etc has not changed a thing for me when it comes to panic.
I like the paintings, I like the way you don't plagiarize and love the content.
Your voice is so calming that I fell asleep twice while trying to listen to this video. You should record audio books!
I had been thinking of doing that, and your comment gave me the push I needed. I just added a new video of me reading a bit of the novel Siddhartha - by Hermann Hesse.
I feel like I’ve been in an emotional flashback for years….
Absolutely brilliant. I've recently been diagnosed with cPTSD and the information here has made me more confident in that diagnosis. Hyper-vigilence is me through and through. That's what happens when you grow up with an abusive alcoholic I guess!
fr
I go through all the F's every time my boyfriend unintentionally triggers my cptsd. First I get angry and Fight, but then feeling his anger I start fawning in hopes to get rid of his anger, when that doesn't work I freeze and dissociate for the rest of the argument. If the argument continues I usually end up in Flight and physically run away. its exhausting
Wow, ty for this. I hadn't made the connection about this yet. This is exactly what I do. Exactly.
I was walking through Home Depot light bulbs on display were crackling and I stopped immediately because it triggered a flashback but it was a happy flashback I even had a smile on my face but I couldn't place the event I couldn't figure out where it was from and I stood there wanting to know what I was trying to remember there was no memory to it it was just a happy reflection of something
Thank you for this helpful information. I really enjoyed the images you chose, the softness in your voice and the calm, peaceful expressions on the faces of the subjects of the paintings. You've clearly allowed your audience to inform your presentation style. I appreciate this, and imagine that it will help in serving others.
Your voice is soothing.
This is exactly how it is
This waz a really great video that put my personal issues because of CPTSD into words in a way that I haven't been able to for a long time, glad that I found it
This is one of the best videos I have come across in regard to the symptoms you mentioned.
Very well explained and without a doubt will help many understand what is happening for them and why.
God bless you ❤️
Your voice... Can you do hypnosis or sleep meditation please 🙂
This is now my fourth time trying to listen to this. I have fallen asleep each time LOL not because the continent was an interesting but because your voice is so relaxing :-)
Notation is a tremendously powerful technique. Training yourself to have a new response to moments of distress and flashback in which you notate what set you off. It works for dieting. It works for cigarettes. And it works in ptsd by making you have a second, helpfully contraditory and introspective response to the things that bother you
Him: *opens book and lists everything I do everyday and my exact mental mindset*
Me: 👁👄👁
Same 👁👄👁 Is this validation? 🤳🦋
Thank u for the information
Until and it was only recently, I started to look into cPTSD, all because of a 5 day affair with a psychologist. Almost everything I read explains my life, emotions, reactions and relationships, personal and work.
I'm 57 and still feel fear when I hear people laugh, that will probably explain why I walked out of a comedians stage show many years ago.
Just felt.....threatened.
I'm glad cPTSD is being taken more seriously.
Really appreciate this video. Thank you. 💙 Discovering Pete Walker and the cptsd framework has been really life changing for me, de-pathologizing my lense of self to a certain extent. when you talked about psychological constriction I started sparking off as you do when you hear something IMPORTANT. The author you quoted, was that Judith Herman?
Excellent work. Thanks.
Thank you for the content
Thank you!
Thank you
Fantastic video! Thank you! ❤
I'm so thrilled to have found your channel!! I wanted to take a moment to commend you for a job well done & encourage you to continue creating content.
I'm finally ready to focus more on healing from my past than understanding my abusers. The later was essential to my healing as well but I feel a shift has taken place. I did 2yrs of EMDR therapy that was truly life changing. Without that, I probably wouldn't have ever known that there is a name for what I was going through bc there isn't a lot of good info readily available on C-PTSD.
I'm not sure what has prevented you from creating more content. Perhaps you are struggling with something personal or you simply chose to take a long break? 🤷 Whatever the case may be for you, I hope that it won't become a permanent obstacle to what you've started here. There are thousands of people (me included 🙋) who need to hear what you have to say & there's no other channel quite like this. Not to mention, you have a calming, soothing voice that your followers enjoy hearing 😉 Please come back!
Be blessed. Be well. Namasté 🙏 💕🕊️🌞
Qq
Thank you so much
Thank you So Much ♥️🌹
Thanks. This is where i'm at
Thank you. 🙏💞✌️
Thank you sir
Thank You. Been a fawn my whole life. It kept me safe.
Thank you for your kindness
ohhh this is spot on! Great Video, I was actually calm listening to this. Subscriber #501
It's hard to believe that evolutionary we are predisposed to conditioning but so hard to uncondition
smh
Thank you. I like your spot-on content and your calm, concise presentation style. Would like to learn a bit about yourself and your sources. Subscibed.
Makes me feel safe.
Thank you so much. i just discovered your channel today and idk why you don't have more subscribers yet. subscribing, liking, commenting and sharing as much as possible. as soon as i'm in a better financial situation i'll be donating on Patreon as well. thank you.
Thank you for this content, really helpful and guiding! Namaste!
Thank you for this excellent explanation.
Thank you for helping me and many of people with this condition.
♥️Thank you. Iam the fawn.
Mindblowing content. Thank u! Cold showers is what helped me to reduce the reactivity to the flasbacks. Learning to turn off ur FFF stress response in a controled environment (the cold shower) is a game changer. Its gives u that split second pause to bring ur awareness on line and understand where ur reaction is actually coming from.
I love culture too, but then I remembered whenever I had to breathe that fast when I was hyperventilating from being gaslit so hard.
I was a super sad day whenever I realized I couldn’t take cold showers, but I worked it out. I take them all the time.
I wrote this recently trying to explain to someone...doubt they read it but I would like to share it:
The unbearable internal pain that is so intense with hurt, it causes numbness. Starting the vicious cycle that I am trying to put the brakes on to go in a different direction towards a beautiful light...that shines on darkness. But that bright light shows the pain in the open..wanting to go back to the dark where it's safe with the knowing it can hide from everything. Causing more pain to the one you trusted and love..but not wanting to give up...hoping and praying they don't give up at all. My ever tormenting pain is winning giving me my queue to drive into the dark horizon...
4 years ago....this is beautifully, sadly written -expressed. It sure does hurt to not feel heard, and while I hope that the person to who you've sent this, read it, I can tell you that I did. It resonates for me and I heard you today. Hoping you're in a place where the light shines more brightly, more often, and thanking you for sharing this piece of art.
Thank you for the comment. I appreciate you taking the time to do so.
Thank you for making these videos 🙆🏻♀️
I'm glad you found them useful. :)
Multumesc! Foarte folositor tot ce postezi. Ma simt inteleasa si acceptata atunci cand te ascult. ❤
really helpful and at great pace and softness. thanks! I have cptsd but i struggle to understand if i am avoiding social gatherings due to cptsd or my introverted character.... i really dont feel comfortable in those settings and just want to leave. ill guess thats another thing to work with my therapist on :)
thanks again
I did face my fears a lot but it never got me anywhere. What i belive know is that I was so distant from everything, like a robot, so I didnt learn. Know I try to expose myself and be more in the present.
That's exactly what it is.
Thank you, simply brilliantly helpful to me to listen to this. Seeing the paintings helps also. So grateful also to Pete Walker for his books and music. I am an adult who freezes when triggered. Most recently by my elderly mother telling me she could have had a great career if I hadn't been born so I should cooperate and be grateful not feel anger or hurt. Reminds me of being 6 years old and hearing her tell me she wishes she never had children. I think now it was due to her own childhood trauma she could never be emotionally present or understanding to a child, instead only (unintentionally / subconsciously?) emotionally abusive and neglectful. I see her repeating this now with her grandchildren so I protect them from her. I think she is Fight type, my sibling flee and fawn , I freeze and have developed an autoimmune disease. Flashbacks mean I sometimes struggle to be present with my own loving children and husband while I learn ways to recover.
this
While.under long term narc exposure your integrated with co dependency and once again your using a child like mind to function so cptsd begins
So true I'm so glad I had this experience so I can fix me to. I never knew how damaged I'am on the emotionally side. Mine was stress induced but thank God I have been digging deep and learning healing and moving forward. So many changes ahead. Complex trauma just wow never even heard of it till a week ago I never felt abused as a child after 52 yrs I've admitted I was abused now it wasn't abused its trauma eye opening to say the least. Good luck and prayers to all.
yeah
This is so me that it is so sad. I cried listening to this. I wish my therapist could understand any of this. She refused to help me by reading Allen walker's book saying that she is the Dr and I can't be the one directing the therapy... I have been In these useless cbt sessions which leaves me in horrible state days after each session. When I try to analyze why I get certain reactions and connects them to my past. She stops me saying why you are relieving the past and not in the here and now. According to ptsd brain scans WE CANat this part of the brain is shunned down.. It needs different approaches to start rewiring the brain down again.. Including emdr and other therapies that connects the body to the brain.. I tried to hold myself from showing her this because she is nice and I don't want to come out as offensive or know it all. But I felt handicapped because I could do that no matter how many times she tells to live in the here and now. So I showed her the parts in the book with the scans.. But I guess she was offended. I don't care about being right or knowledgeable.. I just want to heal... But how can I when I need help.. But all the therapists find me offensive when I show that I have more knowledge about my condition than them and ask for a certain type of therapy.. The complex ptsd from thriving to surviving. Now she wants to treat me as a person but not with a diagnosis. Though this book literally describes my life.. It seems like she didn't know what is my diagnosis so she wants to treat me in the here and now because she doesn't know much about cptsd and doesn't have time to read the damn book. Which I told her it is literally me and I need help trying its method.
Holy cow you deserve a better therapist. There ARE good, trauma informed specialist out there, and many of them have sliding scales to make their appointments more accessible. This therapist is further harming you, please do the work to find a better one. It took me half a year of dedicated work to find mine, but it was SO WORTH IT and lifechanging.
please try a different therapist, you absolutely should be in the front seat of therapy, you're doing the healing and the work, they are the facilitator, shouldn't be a power play,
I was in therapy years ago and it inflamed my cptsd..... I had major flashbacks. It was before Pete walkers book. She diagnosed me with PTSD and did some eye work ect but it didn’t really help. After 18 months of being triggered I vowed never to go back to therapy. Cptsd describes my symptoms perfectly. I would definitely work with a Therapist to work with Pete walkers method. Pls find one that does. I have seen many now I’ve started looking.
THIS
Will you do more videos? This are helpful. It looks like you stopped posting for sometime now.
I like the hyper vigilant scanning. I’ll take a small dose of psychedelic mushrooms and sit in a public place like a bar and just fixate internally on this magnificent awareness of what everyone else is thinking and feeling. The shrooms remove essentially all of my anxiety and what’s left is just this highly refined skill and the feeling of being content experiencing it in action. It’s kind of taboo to recommend drugs but I highly recommend the experience.
That’s a lovely painting of the WW1 soldiers (in the kilt) but I feel that CPTSD should be considered separately from wartime PTSD. The latter is easy to understand. The key element to factor in is size. Life experience. When you are little, even small upsets have a proportionately larger impact. And big events have a massive impact. A child does not have the broader processing power - or agency of an adult. Though even for adults in WW1, agency was restricted. You got shot for ‘shell shock’. So, like a small dependent child, running away was not an option. Though I know someone who ran away when he was 10.
How can it be that flashback is nonstop for years?(just now realised that theere is such thing like PTS. I did not know I have it. I thought it happens from horrific head injuiry accidents only) But for me it was drowning and then medical mistake when I lost ability to breath and noone paid attention to it so I knew thats it I am going to die now and they don't even realise it. Like going on paralel with all other you do or see. I even can feel where exactly it is in head - right back area of head. And most strange is that iff previously that flashback was whole movie off event then suddenly it stucked on one small part from that "movie". And thats worst. It wasn't so bad when whole store reexperiencing because there was good end but now I stucked in before end on worst part in repite. What to do? My head will blowup.
Hi how are you doing now? I wanted to check up on you. 💜
I wonder why the "substance abuse risk" for flights is specifically uppers? I'm definitely a flight and I actively avoid uppers because they put me even more on edge. I take adhd meds every day but I strongly prefer anxiolytics and opiates, based on past experience
Thank you. I love your voice. You sound so deep and calm and sensitive. So intelligent and wise. Are you married? 🤭 that's just me wishing. Sending you love and hugs from the UK xxx
Im a freeze.
I have BPD and Agoraphobia but I believe I also have C-PTSD. Is is possible to have all three together?
i do
I do as well
Perhaps your CPTSD or the trauma behind it if what produced your BPD & Agoraphobia. Just a thought 🤷 Wishing you peaceful days & a joyful heart 💕
the 4 F's
I work in the retention department for a major company. I handle 15 to 20 calls a day. I am required to make offers two customers who want to cancel. Sometimes this makes people angry, they raise their voice, they become agitated and aggressive. This triggers a lot of panic and anxiety as well as anger in me. If I have a too many cancels, I won’t make enough money to pay my bills.If I can’t pay my bills, I could lose my home because I’m in a chapter 13. This is not just a perception but a real possibility. I have the opportunity to make enough money to take care of some necessary repairs that need to be made to my home and car. I will stay here until I can afford to leave. In the meantime, how do I not let this damage my nerves even further?
Try meditation ?
A book that helped me hold on, was The power of now by Ekhart Tolle.
I just try to deal with the today, one day at a time.
I love everything being shared but I don't understand these pictures
Did he say fawns? I've never heard this but it's me
Yes fawn ((:
😭😭😭
One day it will be better. Stay with hope.
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
Don't remember any Ptsd happen in my past but I seem to behave like a lot of these things. I don't get it ?
They may be locked in.. I am 55 and had so many flashbacks last year.. be kind to yourself. X
Emotional flashbacks are called emotional for a reason. Stuff cud ve happened before u cud talk or remember cognitively..your analytical brain doesnt develop full till adolescence..hence its ur emotional brain that did all the recording..its called implicit memory that resides in our subconscious. The body keeps the score..is the book. When u get triggered its ur body that reacts not ur mind. Learning ways to cultivate the internal safety in ur body is the first step to healing.
Who is the peroson the narrator is quoting? Juda Thurman?
I love you everybody , because you deserve it and because of your souls ♥️ keep going and live in the end of your wish fulfilled ...
You can check out Neville Goddards teachings too they will transform you ❤️🙏🏻
Adults with childhood trauma ALWAYS freeze
I do all 4
I tend to do all 4 too, but in a dangerous or physical situation i tend to get aggressive.
I freeze for sure. Just did now when I heard a noise in my house.
Not true
I'm an adult, I lean towards flight most often. I have a friend who also has cptsd, he tends to fawn.
Thank you for helping me out of the abyss bit by bit by bit