J Bates introduces us to his father with severe dementia

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  • čas přidán 29. 08. 2024
  • J Bates has been caring for his father Ron Bates for nearly ten years. His Dad suffers from Dementia and the family has gone public to raise money for the Alzheimer's Association and the Walk to End Alzheimer's

Komentáře • 108

  • @CBeard849
    @CBeard849 Před 10 měsíci +15

    You have to wonder just how many dementia patients out there if they were able to make the decision for themselves.....based on their current condition.....would rather be given a pill to end everyone's suffering.?? I'm about to bring my 84 year old Uncle into our home to live his last years........because I'm the only one who can and he taught me to fish and enjoy so many things. He is already half way to the end of his struggle with dementia and we will travel the rest of the road together.

  • @GiDD504
    @GiDD504 Před 5 lety +97

    I’m crying thinking about my dad. I couldn’t imagine him having dementia. Jay is a strong guy. The pain he goes through must be unbearable.

  • @valeriebanks8877
    @valeriebanks8877 Před 2 lety +48

    My dad always said humans are an adult once and a baby twice . Our parents take care of us and will ultimately return the favor. It’s crazy to think about how true it is . My parents were amazing to me , I’m 28 years old now and would gladly be there for them every step of the way if this were to ever happen to them .

    • @BloodMoonASMR
      @BloodMoonASMR Před rokem +7

      @Empire of the Wolves The only cringe thing here is you.

  • @JellyBean-jr8xb
    @JellyBean-jr8xb Před rokem +14

    My husband is 6 years into this dreadful disease. It’s heartbreaking and totally frustrating. I feel lost and alone most days, watching him deteriorate right in front of my eyes.

    • @chevybowl1527
      @chevybowl1527 Před 5 měsíci +2

      So sorry for what you’ve been going through! Lost my father last summer and now it’s just me and my mother. She has dementia so i understand about there a shell of the person that they were!! Sometimes you feel like you’re all alone and just want to scream! But, that’s not going to help anyone. I have no brothers or sisters to help me. She has a couple of brothers but they’re about 500 miles away! The only help is a couple of cousins who also have family issues! Sometimes she’ll just walk around moving things around and think she’s doing a good thing. She doesn’t sleep the whole night and gets up at different times every morning. God bless you for doing everything you can. You have a friend that understands what you’re going through 💔

    • @pookab5905
      @pookab5905 Před 3 měsíci

      Hello Jelly, I totally understand as I am in the same position as you and it really hurts watching your husband gradually fade away. Family and friends are supportive but I know what you mean about feeling so sad and alone. My husband has had it since 2019 and now is in advanced stages unable to talk or understand who we are. Its crippling to see. Visiting him we do each week but it breaks us up each time. We are though learning to adjust and to cherish the time we have with him and build little memories of him for our future. I have met some incredible people along this journey of dementia who are very inspiring. I do however long for my dear husband to pass and be at rest in Heaven as his quality of life is dreadful. He just sits and stares into nothingness. Are you in the UK I wonder? I have managed to get Continued Health Care for my husband so hes in a specialist Centre for Neurological conditions.

  • @congerscott6064
    @congerscott6064 Před 2 lety +17

    He is a great son and a good man 👍🏆.

  • @noakea
    @noakea Před 6 měsíci +3

    Dad telling his Son "I love You" broke me. What a blessing! ❤

  • @jenngalindo6927
    @jenngalindo6927 Před 3 lety +36

    My dad was diagnosed a few months ago and I cry all day I HATE to see him like this

  • @thgentleman9210
    @thgentleman9210 Před 2 lety +43

    My father just passed from heart complications. He was developing dementia the last 2 years he was only 63. I miss him all the time. Best dad in the world.

    • @MarieAntoinetteandherlittlesis
      @MarieAntoinetteandherlittlesis Před rokem +4

      Oh no. I’m so sorry! My dad is 64 and I don’t know what I’ll do when he or my mom passes. It’ll be unbearable. He’s always been there, always been such a good dad. I’ve always heard people say “my dad died x number of years ago” and I never really stopped to think that that’s gonna be me someday. I’m glad your dad was a good dad to you. Damn.

    • @colourfulcrafts5492
      @colourfulcrafts5492 Před rokem

      @@MarieAntoinetteandherlittlesis it might not. Dunno if you know but there is the anti aging movement going on and funding into curing all age related disease. Spread the word, research it, look up Aubrey de Grey. No this isn't a joke. Top scientists in the field of anti aging are working to cure what aging currently means. One day we may never have to lose our loved ones ❤️❤️❤️

  • @ronnie4796
    @ronnie4796 Před rokem +15

    Your Dad is so blessed to have you 🙏🏻

  • @karenperrealt3520
    @karenperrealt3520 Před rokem +21

    My husband was diagnosed with dementia in March 2022 and i have been his full time caregiver. The time to move him to a long term care facility is in the near future for us. I do the best i can but sometimes its not enough ❤️🙏

    • @perryfan49
      @perryfan49 Před rokem +2

      The same time Bruce Willis was diagnosed with Aphasia and one year later now dementia. God Bless you and your husband.

    • @kenttrussell5750
      @kenttrussell5750 Před rokem +2

      Your efforts are admired

  • @DMaynemusician
    @DMaynemusician Před rokem +10

    living this now. Special moments of connecting is such an important aspect of care.

  • @kathyhavens3153
    @kathyhavens3153 Před rokem +7

    It breaks my heart I want to cry I know their what they are going through bless him and his father and so many more ❤️❤️🙏🏼 my prayers go out to them ALL ❤️

  • @CLKamin
    @CLKamin Před 29 dny

    Bless You Jay, You Did The Right Thing.

  • @joanyoder5880
    @joanyoder5880 Před 7 měsíci +3

    I am so fortunate even though my husband who was 94 when he died of cancer but he was aware rightnup to the end. It would be terrible to have your spouse not know you. I was able to have my husband home until he passed. We were together 75 years, high school sweethearts. I do miss him terribly it has been almost two years since he passed.

  • @marciawheeler6906
    @marciawheeler6906 Před rokem +7

    This is a heartfelt moment. My Dad developed Dementia and it was challenging times for us. I'm an only child and I took care of him until his passing .😢😢😢God bless you for staying by your father's side. You're a good man ! I know how you feel .

  • @corinneblair8795
    @corinneblair8795 Před 2 lety +6

    Big 🤗🤗to J Bates!! Just an amazing son to your father!!!

  • @angelaragon45
    @angelaragon45 Před 4 lety +38

    You’re a good son and I feel your love for your father. I have taken care of my elderly father, who has Parkinson’s disease, for the past 4 years. It’s a stab in the heart and a kick in the gut to see your loved one go through these kinds of diseases. Having said that, as much as it is hard emotionally, mentally and physically to care for someone in this condition I feel blessed because my father gave me the gift to care for him because our love for each other and connection became stronger. 🙂

  • @tiffinyanderson4403
    @tiffinyanderson4403 Před rokem +3

    We’re reaching this situation right now but with my mother slipping away and my father exhausted. It’s such a horrible situation that I wouldn’t wish on anyone.

  • @carlagarrett8584
    @carlagarrett8584 Před rokem +7

    Wonderful Son!! Hope he got some good times with both mom and dad.

  • @IreneDingey
    @IreneDingey Před měsícem

    Poor Darling, my thoughts are with you and Family. My husband just diagnosed with Vascular dementia he is 82. I have learnt so much from watching Ed Salinger’s journey and I have learnt SO much. I wish you All the best with your Dad…Irene
    From Australia ❤😢

  • @grammysal
    @grammysal Před rokem +5

    I had to go through this with my mother. I was only one of us 3 children who was living near enough to take care of her. I had to make the decision to put her in a home and then the final decision of no more antibiotics after having contracted pneumonia more than 5 times. Pneumonia is number one cause of Alzheimer’s deaths as they forget how to swallow. I enjoyed every moment I spent with her. I was the only one she recognized at the end. I’m glad I was able to help her have a peaceful ending.

  • @susanparker4550
    @susanparker4550 Před 2 měsíci +1

    Aww, just started watching but the son's love for his dad is making me want to cry. Plus he's being optomistic which must be almost impossible. God Bless this family ❤ x

  • @Youneverknow222
    @Youneverknow222 Před měsícem +1

    Thank you j bates for sharing this❤

  • @jacquelinemorris9886
    @jacquelinemorris9886 Před rokem +4

    I see my husband fading away .he's here but I miss him ,well the old him,but we still have good some good days ahead .its just a different journey

  • @zudemaster
    @zudemaster Před rokem +4

    Really reminds me of my Dad and what he went through. If i could give any advice talk to them. interact with them. Play music for them. My Dad got to the point where he could no longer communicate, i would put a radio or my phone next to his ear and play music for him. I could see a small spark of life coming back in him and getting excited and happy.

  • @lindamastropietro4429
    @lindamastropietro4429 Před 10 dny

    I’m sorry your family is going through this, especially your father.

  • @darlenealvarado2875
    @darlenealvarado2875 Před rokem +6

    Wish there was a cure..God bless all these victims of Alzheimers..

  • @marcomoreno8188
    @marcomoreno8188 Před 2 lety +5

    God bless you and mr. Bates . Or day at a time

  • @Greenwings701
    @Greenwings701 Před rokem +5

    It is for us to remember who someone really is, and to never forget their true feelings toward us on their behalf. They give us their trust over the years that that we will always remember who they are and their unchanging hearts. Something we do for one another. Not take things personally in those later times, cuz that would break their heart if they knew they'd done that.

  • @dianeackermann4526
    @dianeackermann4526 Před rokem +2

    Jay I'm sory for you. It's sad to go through this. I pray God protects your heart

  • @cdsbz3314
    @cdsbz3314 Před 2 lety +7

    What an amazing son 👏

  • @aland5692
    @aland5692 Před rokem +2

    What an amazing Son, It remind me & my Dad when he was sick. We need more guys like that not a selfish kids.

  • @Oliviux78
    @Oliviux78 Před rokem +3

    My grandmother has dementia but she never had Alzheimers. It’s not just Alzheimers that triggers dementia. ❤

  • @kenttrussell5750
    @kenttrussell5750 Před rokem +3

    However sad your stories are you all, stay strong 💗

  • @kenrhines4770
    @kenrhines4770 Před rokem +6

    I lose my dad on July 16, 2021, I saw him slowly slip away. I still hard for me to deal with seeing him like that and he has been gone for almost 2 yrs now. I still have the picture I took with him as I kissed his forehead two days before he passed.

  • @DeadPool-1
    @DeadPool-1 Před rokem +2

    god bless you and your dad

  • @arlenedixon2547
    @arlenedixon2547 Před rokem +3

    God bless

  • @lynamor2959
    @lynamor2959 Před rokem +3

    You did what you had to do. It’s an awful disease. You had to save your mom. They say sometimes caring for a sick person leads to them taking you with them to the other side. Unfortunately, this is often very true!! It’s extremely hard. Your mom would have went down hill fast. Not everyone has the resources for round the clock care and it’s not for everyone anyway. Every case is different. 💔 (I’m a nurse of 37 years..). Stay strong. God knows your heart!!! You all are in my prayers!!! ❤️🙏❤️.

  • @sandybalthis7508
    @sandybalthis7508 Před rokem +2

    My husband had STML for 15 yrs, now switched to Vascular Dementia

  • @cyrilsmith5706
    @cyrilsmith5706 Před 5 lety +7

    J you a kind great loving dude,been there bro!

  • @maryd253
    @maryd253 Před rokem +2

    You’re a terrific son!

  • @captainngoose
    @captainngoose Před rokem +3

    I couldn't mentally handle dealing with something like this from my mom. I love her _so_ much and she is my best friend and my biggest support. I love her so fucking much. I'm not religious, but I pray that she doesn't get dementia ever. I'm not strong enough.

    • @passionatesingle
      @passionatesingle Před rokem +2

      I had told my parents I could never handle taking care of them if they ever got sick because I was too emotional. I didn't think I could dovit but my mum developed Alzheimers 4 years ago now and not only did I find the strength to handle the situation I moved to the other side of the world too to become her fill time carer as my dad at 93 couldn't do it on his own. It's an honor being able to do this. It's amazing how much strength and patience you can develop when the need arises. But she is worth it all,even if it means my life has changed completely. She took care of us,we're taking care of her now. We will not put her in a home until the very end. She would never be given the love and care that we give her. Knowledge is power,the more I learned about the disease and how to take care of someone with it,the easier it became, not that difficulties don't arise daily but you are better equipped.

  • @elapaszczynski495
    @elapaszczynski495 Před 6 měsíci +1

    Son is a beutyfull person,bless you

  • @maryrenu2927
    @maryrenu2927 Před 2 lety +4

    How sad I know how he feels I’m going through it with my husband at the moment it’s so sad to see him,but I have to go on for better or for worst

  • @janetfishwick8887
    @janetfishwick8887 Před 2 lety +5

    My 94 year olds mother has stage 4 Alzheimers and still lives on her own. Mother is deteriorating rapidly and can now no longer use any cooking facilities in her kitchen. She has carers twice a day and is under Adult Social Care Services. Mother according to them,still has " capacity" to maintain herself but this is becoming increasingly limited. She refuses most things on offer like personal alarms and company. Mother wants to be left on her own and cope by herself. She is unaware of day, time , year or season and sits all day reading newspapers which mean nothing to her. She is obsessed with lights in her bungalow and rings my sister until the early hours wanting her heating, or the solar garden lights turned off.Mother refuses to consider going into a Care Home so we, her family

  • @teelesynclair5902
    @teelesynclair5902 Před 2 lety +6

    Watched my grandmother die from vascular dementia, it's awful 😢

  • @user-tb4el1sr1q
    @user-tb4el1sr1q Před 6 měsíci +1

    Ron you have sincere eyes and i get a strong feeling your dad used to love to drive alot but i could be not correct and I went to New Orleans oh my God I just heard her say he was a mechanic

  • @AlrebeccaBarenboum
    @AlrebeccaBarenboum Před rokem +2

    Hard... I m taking care about my father right now, and I lost my dearest Mom 1,5 years ago....

  • @Funnykid56
    @Funnykid56 Před 7 měsíci +1

    Opened my mind even more…

  • @veronicaziegler63
    @veronicaziegler63 Před rokem +2

    This brings back memories of lewy body dementia it's a awful seeing them leaving us

  • @denisemurray274
    @denisemurray274 Před rokem +2

    So unbelievably sad,,,my mom had dementia,so,so sad,,

  • @tarpleyk9352
    @tarpleyk9352 Před rokem +2

    My dad passed from Alzheimers ten years ago. I recently got a purple Alzheimers ribbon around my index finger... 💜

  • @guadalupecasillas1800
    @guadalupecasillas1800 Před rokem +2

    Please investigate the jalisco desease it’s a thing ina small region of jalisco Mexico where you can find a whole bunch of people with early onset Alzheimer’s it’s called altos de Jalisco

  • @victorialarkin5802
    @victorialarkin5802 Před 11 měsíci +2

    And there is yet to be finding financial assistance for care for dementia or cancer...medicaid spend-down takes everything...its so ridiculously expensive Exhausting. American regulations

  • @ottoes8098
    @ottoes8098 Před 2 lety +5

    My grandmother was diagnosed a year ago. The thought that she could turn into this is horrirble.

  • @determined2win585
    @determined2win585 Před 4 měsíci

    ❤ This is beautiful!

  • @mouse3043
    @mouse3043 Před 2 lety +6

    How old was your dad here? Ten years? I'm just freaking out about this because my dad has really bad dementia right now and there is no way any of us could afford to put him in a memory care facility (like most people). He's 79. He asked me his wife's name the other day. He can never remember his dogs' names and he's already been lost for 24 hours in the car. After that we put Apple airtags in his cars. He becomes irate when we talk about him not driving at all. He's been starting to 'wander' getting up at 3:00 in the morning and walking around their condo complex.

    • @karenperrealt3520
      @karenperrealt3520 Před rokem +1

      When you cant afford $$ he will go in medicaid. Talk to an attorney who specializes in elderly care

    • @jarlenbates
      @jarlenbates Před 4 měsíci +1

      His first symptoms were at 55, this was about 65-66-ish

  • @janetfishwick8887
    @janetfishwick8887 Před 2 lety +2

    So we her family have to endure, tolerate and try to help her despite her strong opposition.

  • @anupamprasad9645
    @anupamprasad9645 Před 11 měsíci +1

    kindly introduce fasting in your daily life
    fasting has immense positive effects on our body

  • @bridgettwasson7783
    @bridgettwasson7783 Před rokem +4

    😢😢😢😢😢

  • @JohnOLooney
    @JohnOLooney Před rokem +1

    man made and man driven

  • @CORPSE77
    @CORPSE77 Před 2 lety +3

    🥺 I wish there is a miraculous solution/ medication to this damn disease that affects our loved ones.

  • @lamt5202
    @lamt5202 Před rokem +2

    @0:01 , 67 second hmmm. Why not 69 seconds. Only 2 seconds away. I bet if it is 69 seconds, anyone can defeat Alzheimer, unforgettable memories.

  • @luluhalls1
    @luluhalls1 Před 8 měsíci +1

    It's time for hospice.

  • @davea5150
    @davea5150 Před rokem +1

    My mother died of this!!

  • @vaniaguy8257
    @vaniaguy8257 Před 6 měsíci +1

    ❤😔🥰

  • @jokutyyppi4226
    @jokutyyppi4226 Před měsícem

    It's like they're physically there but really you lost them

  • @kenttrussell5750
    @kenttrussell5750 Před rokem +1

    I Lost my mother to dimentia

  • @wayneferrier8096
    @wayneferrier8096 Před 5 měsíci +2

    Is it god who he picks who suffers and who doesn't.this is as bad as getting a diagnose of cancer even probably worse with cancer you don't have all these problems.when your brain functions the whole of your wellbeing.its a wicked world and a unfair one.

    • @tiahenry4743
      @tiahenry4743 Před 4 měsíci

      I knew how to cure dementia but I continued to smoke and eat junk. I can walk and talk only because I am taking medications.

  • @yankorusev
    @yankorusev Před 2 lety +3

    Been there; it’s horrible

  • @joeldecoster8816
    @joeldecoster8816 Před 2 lety +1

    my kids cant handle it.

  • @blindsey1043
    @blindsey1043 Před rokem +1

    Barbara Walter brought me here RIP

  • @sheilagadde5975
    @sheilagadde5975 Před 7 dny

    I believe it is wrong to keep them alive.

  • @Brenda0312F
    @Brenda0312F Před rokem +2

    This MUST BE INTENTIONAL. Experimental maybe?
    This was NOT the case less than 30 yrs ago. We never heard of THIS MANY PEOPLE “being senile” back then.
    This is a deliberate IMHO.

    • @saeed7099
      @saeed7099 Před rokem

      You're a stupid Sob and I wish the worse things in life on you. Scum.

  • @biancahotca3244
    @biancahotca3244 Před rokem +2

    They were only married 4 decades?

  • @user-rd6tuYuf
    @user-rd6tuYuf Před 10 měsíci +1

    GMF side effects?

  • @kaiballington55
    @kaiballington55 Před 9 měsíci +1

    ughhh only 72

  • @mrd3016
    @mrd3016 Před rokem +2

    There are worse things than death. That is a bitter pill for a Christian culture to come to terms with.

  • @joeldecoster8816
    @joeldecoster8816 Před 2 lety +2

    When your caregiver is a stinking drunk.....and your son is a thieving junkie..mooching off you, and your daughters are single teenage mums and you cant even afford food.

  • @dice1740
    @dice1740 Před 4 lety +3

    Lmao wait till 5g my nigga. Were finna be ostrages at 60 😂

    • @marqgz
      @marqgz Před rokem +4

      Huh🤨🤷🏾‍♂️

  • @mauricamcginnis4063
    @mauricamcginnis4063 Před 8 měsíci +1

    Good stuff 🙂 🦊 news 🗞️.Love to see this . Thanks 👍.