ANGER & ANXIETY, HIJACKALS & YOU: Understand What's Happening
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- Äas pĆidĂĄn 8. 09. 2024
- A whole chicken and egg thing! đĄAnger and anxiety are closely related, and it's essential to see how. Hijackals in the mix create a whole other level of mess! Listen in for help to clarify what's happening IN you and TO you.
HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:
- How anger and anxiety are different
- Similarities between anger and anxiety in the body
- How anxiety can turn to anger and anger can generate anxiety
- How anger and anxiety show up in a toxic relationship with a Hijackal or a narcissist
- Why understanding anger and anxiety in these ways can help you make decisions
If you were raised by, live with, or have left a Hijackal--a relentlessly difficult, toxic person, you know what it is to live with anger and anxiety. Sometimes, at the same time, too! Internal anxiety can shift to externalized anxiety which shows uip as anger. It can leave you wondering if you're the Hijackal, right? Yes, it can, but that's not an accurate conclusion to draw. Hijackals are crazy-making, and when anger and anxiety enter the picture, your ability to think straight dulls.
Anger is usually an antagonism for one person who you think is causing your suffering. Maybe, is even responsible for it. Anxiety is a build-up of tension and worry because you don't feel in control of yourself, the situation or the future. That's why you can feel anxious and find yourself expressing anger, and you can feel angry and know that it is an outlet for pent-up anxiety.
Oh, and remember that episode I did on Reactive Abuse? That's a good example of this crazy-making cycle of anxiety and anger. If anything I've written so far makes sense, you'll find even more understanding in that episode. Add that to this one, and you'll clearly see the cycles and why they need to end.
Learn more about how anxiety takes you out of the present and disconnects you from your present reality. Anxiety is usually about something that hasn't happened yet, but you're worried it might. Both anxiety and anger are rooted in fear. That takes some work to recognize, claim, and change. This episode is a good start!
* * Remember, narcissists and other toxic people come in all genders and ages * *
and toxic relationships can be at home, at work, at play... with your parent, boss, spouse, sibling, friend, co-worker.
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I am Dr. Rhoberta Shaler, The Relationship Help Doctor.
Are you in relationship with a Hijackal? That's someone who consistently puts you down, love-bombs and gaslights you, creates confusion and chaos, and causes you to second-guess yourself? I can help you recognize, understand, and make decisions about those kinds of narcissistic behaviorâŠand especially, how to keep yourself (and your children) safe and sane.
No worries about where in the world you live. I work through private, secure video conferencing. So, we can certainly work together to figure a few things out.
CONNECT WITH ME:
Website: www.ForRelatio...
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Twitter: @RhobertaShaler
LinkedIn: / rhobertashaler
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Get my free ebook at www.Hijackals.com
Take my free checklists: www.forrelatio...
Are you looking for relief from the pain, confusion and drama of toxic relationships? I can help.
You can reclaim your personal power. Keep watching my videos on CZcams to find strategies for changing your relationship dynamics.. When you're ready, let's talk.
You can take advantage of my one-time. new client introductory Consultation here (only $97 for a full hour)
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#Hijackals #toxicpeople #narcissists #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stoptoleratingabuse #toxicrelationships #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #narcissisticabuse #personalitydisorder
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She wasn't just in the car. She's been listening to us all the time. I can't believe that she's telling my story clearer than I could.
As a child, I was afraid to cry much for fear of being spanked more by my dad after already being spanked for being naughty. Not being able to control tears caused fear... it taught me to be stoic as a child and still as an adult.
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Praying for you Hugs
That smirk. I know it only too well .
My husband does it all the time .. to me . My analogy is, he's like a dog with an old slipper . I'm the slipper . He gets me in his teeth, snarling, and hurls me around the room . Then skulks off and ignores me .
That smirk, indeed! Nasty.
What are you doing to stop being that slipper?
Ugh that smirk. My ex's 11yo golden daughter did it to me in the middle of being a smart@ss causing trouble (yet again). Total narc in the making. Honestly it made me want to punch her in the face (i didn't). Its disgusting and makes you absolutely dislike them
All beautifully on spot. †Wonderful content and great for sharing!
Excellent! Thanks for reaching out.
OMG this woman;s been in the car with us!
You are incredible. Your videos have helped me more than anyoneâs. Please continue your amazing work.
Thank you! Will do!
Thanks for great content as always
My pleasure!
Thank you!! this is life changing
omg......criticism came from my Mom, my husband. and I overcame it. Now it is coming from my adult child. :( I feel worn out. sos.
Unfortunately, your child may have learned from your husband. I hope you will have strong boundaries and teach your adult child that they cannot treat you that way. I wish you strength to do that.
same for me, you're not alone, you're probably stronger than you think because of what you have learnt before. Good luck! courage!
Dear Dr. Shaler, I have watched lasts episodes several times. Extremely interesting! Thank you so much for your job!
You are very welcome
Thank you so so much for these videos, you've helped me gain some perspective and it feels good to have a way to make some sense of the emotional abuse and the part about being in the present moment is very important, there is no balance in these situations
You've very welcome.
I really love your shows I so greatly to found you and Iâm in that relationship now
They will ALWAYS attack. Always.
That's the psychopathic side of them. Yup.
Iâm a covid longhauler so sick but canât discuss it with my family. I donât want to make them feel bad about being here a lot when âŠinfecting me.
I'm so sorry to hear that you're going through that. It's kind of you to consider your family's feelings, AND it's important that they know what you are going through. You can discuss your feelings and needs without blame, right?
There are excellent videos made by Criss Miller called â the power and control wheal â âŠ.I am recommending everyone should watch it âŠâŠhe describes very well the ABUSERâS TACTICS âŠâŠand their thinking ways âŠ..stay awake . You can find them here on CZcams .
My fiance claims she has a lot of money... But I can't use it.... And now she claims she bought a 2.5 million beach front home... Closing in 2 weeks.... Called the relator and the home is still being shown and no offer has even been made.... And this story is just the tip of the iceberg đ€ŠđŒââïžđ€ŠđŒââïžđ€ŠđŒââïžđ€źđ€ŠđŒââïžđ€ŠđŒââïžđ€ŠđŒââïž oh ya 2 Brain tumors... I just can't go to any of the doctors appointments with her
How. Do I leave hm. Iâm terrified
I know that it can be terrifying, usually because of the Hijackal's rage. I can help you if I know much more about your situation.
Two ways to get my help privately:
one time, new client hour appointment: BeAClient.com
OR, join my Emerging Empowered Community and get help from myself and others who have experienced what you're going through: JoinInToday.com