Best of Jimmy's FAT JOKES VOL. 2 | Jimmy Carr
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- čas přidán 3. 09. 2020
- There was just far too many fat jokes to put in 1 compilation, so here is the second part..
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#JimmyCarr #Fat #Weight #Joke #Funny #Comedy #StandupComedy - Komedie
“Not all fat people are jolly. Some of them are women.” -Jimmy Carr
nice but it was difrent
Monica: The camera adds 10 pounds!!
How many cameras are pointing at you?
*Chandler Bing
I was going to mention that
It was so how many cameras are actually on you
If you quote it do it right mate
@@anonymousmafia6973
@@Scratchingforcash thanks man
Please release more full shows! Can't get enough of Jimmy Carr
I love his hour specials, he's smart and spot on timing when he's on a roll
As a certified fat guy, I approve of all theses jokes
I wish there was some gay jokes I could approve lol.
We get it your gay
@@bloodisfrightening1203 ... he does those also, and I as a gay man approve.
as a skinny girl who could be modern kate moss i approve of his jokes
"Stop eating f'n cameras" 🤣😂🤣🤣😂🤣😂
It’s funny how you can tell the truth as a joke and it’s not controversial.
Oh the good old days
“In your specific country”
it is online but it’s comedy live. what are they gonna do storm on stage and hate crime him?
That OCD girlfriend joke reminded me of something. Years and years ago I used to go to an OCD support group. We had a non-OCD person come in to ask some questions, particularly relating to their spouse who had OCD- the usual stuff, treatments and all that. We warned her that SSRIs can lower sex drive. She was thrilled. Apparently when they were having sex he had to do certain things a specific number of times, even if they'd already got the job done and were becoming painful.
Джимми. Спасибо тебе за настроение. Спасал от депрессии очень много раз. Хорошо, что есть такие люди, как ты.
I'm German and the best jokes are the ones about us. Love you Jimmy
I walked up too a fat girl and said you're big lass aren't you with a tear in her eye she said tell me something I don't know
The taste of salad
Salad dodgers...
Funny bro, remind me when to laugh
legend With your dementia there wouldn't be much point.
As a fat guy, you could walk up to a skinny girl and say: "hey babe, you want to make a BIG mistake?"
*I walked up to a fat girl and said "You're a big lass aren't you?" With a tear in her eye, she said "Tell me something I don't know." I said "The taste of salad."
You're welcome
In case you're unaware 34 stone equals 476 lb
Kg? Nwm i google it 🤥
215,9 kg
@@johanneskarlsson3859 jesus!!!!
This was why I decided to scroll the comments lmao thanks
Most people have now
got a Google home Mini or Alexa
it's like having a encyclopaedia of knowledge in your home
After losing 25 pounds I still laugh about these jokes.
25 out of how many?!? Anyways that should take you about a month with healthy food and exercise ☺️ not a big deal 😜
After gaining 25 pounds I still laugh about these jokes
I hate losing money..
I’d be fuming if I lost 25 pounds man thats a good few pints
I found your 25 pounds.
Stop effing eating cameras😂😂
A german joke:
My grandfather died in a concentration camp.
He fell from the watchtower.
My grandpa killed over 300 German pilots, I tell ya he was the worst mechanic in the Luftwaffe
@@thekgb2436 :')
Being a german, I approve
did he fall because of his cake retention
''you're gonna be adopted'' bad from your biological parents,
good from the orphanage lady
remove “gonna be” and “biological” and it’s👌
The funniest guy ever. And the most offensive. Love at first sight.
Aren't you worried about the age gap
I wasn't first, I wasn't last, but I was fast.
That what she said
@@joseantoniolago5857 that's what he said
Your wife must love you
@@rogueangel72 nope that's why I'm digging in the garden
Now give me the cash.
Great stuff!
I tryed to get offended but I couldnae stop laughing
4:18 that’s the sweetest little laugh
Jimmy you'r the best!
WARNING, YOU HAVE A MISSING A VOWEL, THIS IS PNISHABLE BY DEATH
_ SuperBlueKnight _ YOU HYPOCRTE
@@prolapsdrektem9264 that may or may not be the joke my bro
Hahahaha I love this
Kurrupted Gaming r/woosh
Going to see him live tomorrow night I can't wait 😆😆
I love the toothbrush joke.
34 people probably shouldn't have watched this video.
Dyslexia is real LMAO
Lmao yeah ik just thought that it was a funny thing to say lol
68 people shouldn't have watched this video ... I think we might have a pandemic on our hands .... couch .... planet!
It’s 153 now
Why? Cause they're hard to impress? Or they know things that are true aren't actually funny
8:30 I felt that x)
Nuhhahah that laugh is hilarious
I love fat jokes.
Boss. Thanks Jimmy!
1:38 😂😂😂😂😂😂
I've lost over 200lbs and I not only laugh I've subscribed
Well done! I've lost 70lbs and always got a kick out of fat jokes when they weren't directed at specific people. Jimmy Carr is great.
They have a glandular problem, salivary gland.
Nice
Waiting for the day the cameraman starts laughing and the camera starts panning up and down 😭
No, comedy shows always use German cameramen for this exact reason
@@kalebbruwer LMAO, I didn't know that
@@crimtek Well, I was being sarastic. Idk what they actually do
@@kalebbruwer oh
🤣🤣🤣🤣
8:54 All inclusive thank goodness!
i swear jimmy ur the best ever. its so fkin funny its crazy hahahahhahaha
WHERE'S MY "people with turrets" ENDING?
'turrets' kek.
tourette's
So the people that disliked are fat? Haha, you've activated my trap card.
Frequency of commercials is getting out of hand !
ever heard of adblock ?
I watched this video eating out of the ice cream container.
@george chapelle Mkay, "try thinking for yourself." - P. Twats
I ❤ it
I wonder if Diana found out about a certain island....
He killed himself tho
@@AleksandarIvanov69 yeah no, he was murdered.
Half of it aren't fat jokes but good thing it's a best of.
Giggidy.
I wasn’t first, I wasn’t last, but I sure was fairly fast
@Aslan T Vorlon 🤣
Hi there
😂😂
Jimmy chaaaarr, a new video. Saying that in the way roasted English accents.
@Aslan T Vorlon watch his other videos.
Ahh ahh ahhhhh
In case you’re unaware 34 stone equals 216 kg
I'm still unaware.
He's almost ready to run for president in America.
Hes far too anti Christian for that. You need to at least pretend to like God to get the support of half the country.
Ahhhhhhhh
It's old Jimmy
He’s fab
Why is it that when’s it’s a regular person, it’s offensive, and when it’s a comedian, everyone laughs?
Don’t know, don’t care, I’m fat too
Do not listen to the internet. As a regular person, I have made plenty of fat jokes to fat-ish people and they have laughed.
Not getting Email notifications for subscription
What show is this? (Red background, black suit, pink shirt)
👍👍👍
Should appear once as Charlie McCarty
*_Bruh_*
Shouldn't the Stone be referred to as a boulder? Lol
those christian jokes were too hilarious
Does anybody else think his innocent face doesn't seem to match the subject matter ;)
5.4K likes by me
5:10 … or now just a whole new person
😂😂😂👍
Aside from the not makin jokes bout muslims cuz u scared dont be, but ngl for me as a muslim, my respect for you just went up by a lot ♡
It's so fat he couldn't even keep it in a single volume
I feel like it's a little insensitive to use the word "volume" here.
People who claim Jimmy Carr is fattest obviously haven't seen any real fatties.
Neurosurgery is a great way to lose weight....it worked for me. Nothing like having your jaw muscle cut, to stop eating XD
I had neurosurgery I never had my jaw cut open
@@zapkvr They cut through the muscle because of the second section of my brain they had to remove. Every op is different and I hope yours was successful, Mate.
@HEAV¥HAND No it's not an actual technique for weight loss, but I lost weight because I couldn't eat without unbelievable pain. It was just a bonus from the op and the hospital agreed it probably wouldn't take off as an option for weight loss XD
@@goaway2803 Hey so I'm presuming I went through something similar and I have a decent suggestion. It may not sound appealing initially, but give baby food a try. I was able to get real nutrition without much pain at all. I ate lots of cereal and fruits while be very surprised how much I enjoyed eating them, though I wasn't a fan of soups or meats. Oat and Rice cereals had decent protein content as well. I have another surgery planned and I know I'll be eating a bunch of baby food again. Hope you're doing well!
@@Tryo707 I've been extremely fortunate and the op seems to have been successful. I ate an awful lot of thinly sliced watermelon (lucky it was in season) I still can't open the right side of my jaw properly, so I just have to think ahead as to what I can and can't manage. Good luck for your next op and I hope your recovery goes quickly, Mate.
Bye
Life is tough for comedians with the WOKES constantly barking at their doors!
KEEP IT UP GUYS.
Not really, I do not think you realise how small the woke community is or at least how small the dumb woke people are. And their are a lot of good/funny woke people that watch his shows anyway that love it.
It is just that a small group of people make it seem like the woke community is bad.
Jimmy looks chubby
poor
What ever James. I didn't raise you your adoptive family did James
What ever James you can be cruel all you want but just remember I only tried to love you in the right way when you were born but I guess you already had this planned out. And you couldn't even tell me what I had done that I don't know of because you took my memory remember. oh you girlfriend cyrtal that you lie to about me.
Stop eating cameras … ;)
hehehe 3rd
Jimmy says: get injected with a toxic substance or else I will make you look very silly. Cos I am cleverer than you and get loads of dosh from pharma companies.
He's been great about shaming the unwashed
The camera adds 10 pounds, stop eating fucking cameras. 🤣😂
I've stolen and been using that for years.
Its never the other way around, no skinny women feeding fat guys....unless they are rich of course
First
fat jokes.....
Oh... First
No you're not
@@sorceressy2k1 damn
Spikez they are
🥇
If Christians had any power at all they would not be forgiving
"Forgiveness comes from God."
as they lit the pyre under your feet.
The Catholic Church (and that's just a faction within Christianity) has a net worth of about 30 billion $. And about a billion people who think they're just great. If you don't think that's power, then I don't know what to tell you. They have far _too_ much power for this day and age.
@@TheAce12570 thanks for making my point ;)
Nice vid for the uncaring Q2.
Really, are they jokes?
ieatbats andcorona, no I’m saying they’re true
Yup👌
@ieatbats andcorona I believe you owe an apology.
You were suppose to avenge me but instead you consider me less then a door matt ya you all look fucking Amazing all right Amazing that you can be so fucking cruel in inhumane. You better not have done nothing to your fucking own brother
nah, these short quick jokes are not for me
*gasp* He’s not wearing a mask!
Pre-COVID🤣
muslim jokes!!!
I feel like it's a little insensitive to use the word "volume" here.
Why are all of these about women though
Why does it matter ?
@@thrillfinesse she needs to be offended
#FatLivesMatter
#everythingmatters 🤣
#noonemattrs
I never understood why jokes about muslims or islam were so weird... i mean even today... as a muslim myself i couldnt care less if a joke was told about it ... i mean its a damn joke...
sure a lot of ppl dont find it funny ... but if you dont find it funny just have the politeness to let those who laugh at it enjoy it ...
Jimmy is funny but the caned laughter is irritating cant watch
That's his best? ... Tried to laugh but nothing is funny... If he were Muslim, he'd be in Guantanamo prison.
Why?
@@jrd33 cuz he's a Muslim
@@justnznz I don't think Jimmy Carr is a Muslim.
@@jrd33 dude, .... You are extremely slow..
Not his best, shame
Maybe do some research before making a thyroid joke. Thyroid can make you gain or lose weight depending on the levels of hormones produced by it.
Are you seriously fact-checking a joke? Do you understand humour at all?
too much acting, its not genuine. it feels like im watching movie stars virtue signal
I don’t find him funny! I guess I’m just used to good comedy, being an Aussie and all!
More of a Jim Jefferies fan then?
It could just be the loctation, his jokes are dimmed down in some places to match the audience.
There funny because there true 😂😂😂