How To Stay Single. Lisa Alvarado - Full Special
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- čas přidán 22. 05. 2022
- Lisa Alvarado is here to tell you how to stay single in her new full special with Dry Bar Comedy. Whether you're someone who is looking to stay single forever, or you're just someone who is looking for ways to be happy while being single this Dry Bar Comedy special from Lisa Alvarado is sure to be packed full of helpful information that will keep you laughing from start to finish.
If you enjoyed this full special from Lisa Alvarado, be sure to check out the links below for even more Dry Bar Comedians you might enjoy!
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#drybar #comedy #standup - Komedie
she is way funnier than the audience gave her credit for
she was hilarious. great stage presence, excellent delivery, funny stories, and some clever punchlines. the crowd did not deserve her
I just started my channel. Comedy writer gone performer
I've been married for 13 yrs, never tell em to "calm down"
Unless you want to end your life....
"You need to calm down. You're being too loud"
“So many different kinds of Beige”. Lololol😂😅❤
1:05 "You never know how they [valets] are gonna treat your kids." :-D What a sadly hilarious line! But *that* is comedy: Letting us deal with the painful by laughing!
being single is awesome!
AMEN
Agreed
He says: woman…and her face is hilarious….she is edgy and smart and very funny
"Do it the first f'ing time I ask you"! AMEN, sister. I ask hubby to do something once, it don't get done, after a week I ask again, it don't get done, a week later I ask again. He says, "Stop nagging me"!
Another exemple that you can be funny without throwing lazy F words for cheap laughs. Great job me lady I bow to thee 😊 I wished more comedians would take notes.
As a person who has fun doing open mic and has been on stage almost 25 times as a comedian listed with headliners from radio and a couple that have been on HBO. . I do pretty good, but at almost 60 Its not for me to pursue just having fun with life. .. Her timing is spot on...
Its actually very easy for me to stay single, all I have to do is look in the mirror each morning.
Mirror , mirror on the wall ... Who is the fairest of them all ?
Oh your speaking my language.!
word. I understand
This woman deserves a license on dating counseling.
A very good comedienne! I really enjoyed this set!
Soooo BRILLIANT!
Lisa gives good relationship advice. We need VR googles that let us see ourselves in the same way that women see us.
Lisa, as a single Christian, it scares me to even think about using a website for dating. If I don't meet someone from church or from a friend at church, I may not be dating. The man who manages to steal your heart will be one blessed man❣🙏❤ You're very funny while just talking about real life. And thank you for telling women to tell us what the issue is, we're not mind readers. Now about that garage spring, the cat's tail was too long, and Johnny needed a haircut, so it's a win win! 😂🤣 Blessing to you and your son! 🤗
Not all church going men are what you think they are. Alot of them have skeletons in their closets. Just put in your online profile that you love God and he comes first and see what happens. Set boundaries and draw a line.
She is super funny!! I'll be checking to see if she ever tours through Florida!!
Gorgeous Lady ! Good show !!
Very funny!!!😎😀😁
LOVE IT ¡¡¡¡
So, like, I had my high school students write a research paper on Euthanasia and one of them wanted to know what country it was in and another one want to know if it was a school club called Youth in Asia.
You are a teacher and you start off this comment with "So, like"???
Really? Euthanasia is an approved high school topic huh?
@@markjones2349 - Not exactly, Mark. "Euthanasia" is the name of the "Little League" kids baseball franchise in Japan. American Baseball is really popular there, I'm sure you've heard that. So is Little League.
Youth in Asia 😂😂
@@rainsofhealing - That is spelled "アジアの若者" in Japanese, whereas "Euthanasia" is spelled "安楽死". They are phonetically pronounced the same, so the shorter spelling is used. It has something to do with all the little squiggly letters making the little kids eyes squint, even making some of them cross-eyed.
Finally, a VERY funny female comedian. Another viewer replied, "The crowd is terrible…I sort of feel sorry for her in the beginning at least…they are Very uptight." I agree, her humor is probably a bit sophisticated for a youngish crowd, but wife and I enjoyed the set.🙆♂🙆♀
My comedy probably wouldnt be called sophisticated. I'm a comedy writer
I'm 56 yrs old & I'm sorry but I forced myself to watch the entire set & did not laugh once! It's not the crowd's fault & has nothing to do with age...she's just not funny!
To: Wise Ole Geezer, if you wanna hear someone REALLY funny, look up Jeff Allen. He is hilarious!
@@tina849 Jeff is my absolute favorite! ♥️ I just wish he'd come up with some new material. 🤔
@ Tina
@Wise Ole Geezer I feel like her delivery/voice runs at the same speed and high intensity throughout. That bothers me, I guess I feel like she's nonstop pushy. I'm definitely not part of a younger crowd anymore either. 👵
Great material!Thanks
The bath joke. Brill.
Centimeters in a yard 😆
1 yd=91.44 cm (I got the joke, but my science teacher background urged a reply)
I find Dry Bar hit or miss. Lisa is hilarious!
Pro-Tip Ladies. Say what you want or mean. Stop using a code only you understand then get mad at us when we do exactly what you said. Lmao.
The chorus of unwritten just playing in the background
I tell every woman k date that I don't fall for that nonsense. We're adults, speak to me like one and stop playing these little girl games where you want us to guess what's in your heads
Lisa delivered that way funnier 🤣
Tho sometimes it is kinda obvious 😂
Those centimeters are so fast... I lost it. This woman has great build up and timing.
This was brilliant. Thank you for this show! I hope you continue finding your happiness!
Really lame crowd. She's great.
Tough crowd!
Very good job! Thanks
WooHoo! I love Peru 🇵🇪!
You're really funny. Congrats.
Cubtle😁She's hilarious
Thanks!
Nice Job! -- "SGL" ( "Smart & Good Looking!")
Actually pretty funny. Crowd was dull
I don’t think she’s playing well to the Mormon crowd
Or any crowd for that matter
I'm not LDS, still not laughing. Just saying.
You guys are lame. And think your opinion matters 😜
She just being rude. Who told her she was funny?
@@GdGllyMolly she’s like every terrible feminist comedian all wrapped into one
Hilarious!
I heard her describe the gross crime scene bedroom and thought "I didn't know my brother was doing online dating."
Nah auto correct isn't our friends 🤣🤣🤣.. that's what gets some of us looking like 1st graders 🤣🤣* all those dam typos.
I've learned the key to a great marriage. When my wife gets mad at me I play the song "Waymaker" in Spanish, don't know if it's works on a non Spanish speaking girl though
No one said a word when she said "I got saved when i was 4 months pregnant." Not an "Amen" nothing!!
Utah is Mormon mostly not exactly Christian.
I mean Satan is not the brother of Jesus and Mormons teach that.
Mormons don't care about "salvation." They're trained to define words by their false prophets differently than the dictionary or the Bible. Saved to them just means that you're going to continue to exist after death. Ephesians 2 and Romans 5 go out the window.
@@ShadyOakMinistries more like salvation means you climb the ladder and receive your own planet to be a god of.
@@midwayinn1043 That's the doctrine of Exaltation. Equally false and what makes Mormonism the most polytheistic cult in existence. Hindus stop in the millions. Mormons believe in infinite gods and goddesses. Isaiah 44-48 are also thrown out the window.
So proud of you Lisa 💜
The valet parking bit would be a good ferris bueller input 😂😂😂
cool, thank u for your condescension.
Cubtle is just genius.
I couldn't get past the single mom comment. Now I'm wondering if it's worth the drive across country back to LA just to see if I can find her 🤔🤫
@COMBAT GARDENER I'm in line, first. 😜
haha fantastic ending
So glad im single.
Can’t see how she’s single………🤔
Lol
Very easy to see why she’s single……………She thinks all men are stupid🙄
*( "INCONCEIVABLE" ! ) €¥£ ^
🤣🤣
Where can i find these guys with SpongeBob shower curtains?!
What a great closer 👏 so few performances seem to get that right so I appreciate when they do
my comedy is edgy. ok not clean.
Nooo don't leaveeee
Her: (With no mechanical understanding at all) You need to fix that spring, it's really dangerous.
(Four Months later - No accidents have happened - Obviously it is NOT dangerous)
Her: (Goes nuts over something that he already looked at and determined was NOT dangerous. ) At this point, "If you don't know why..." is not only inappropriate, it demonstrates a level of mental illness because a) You still remember that you asked us.... We Don't. and b) Four months later you are STILL clinging to the insane notion that this is "Dangerous".
I love you!
How many centimeters in a yard might be the greatest joke ever. I don't know if it was your joke or perhaps you heard it somewhere else at some point in your life and said this joke rocks. Whatever the case, your delivery was super Rockstar congrats.
1 more advice for the men...fixing things the first thing she asks is the most sexiest thing you could do in a long term relationship. For a long time I got hot looking at a picture of my X when he mopped the kitchen floor for the only time he did it. It was so exciting act that I had to take a photo to develope (long time since). Still have that photo to teach my son that there is a possibility if he does this on regular basis he might get into permanent relationship😂
How about you ladies learn how to keep your mans belly full and his balls empty? Then you might be able to get into a permanent relationship.
Love it! 🥰. Smart mom!
Only if you tell your men EXACTLY what you want him to do and not a metaphor.
Too much pain leaking through the jokes. I felt like giving her a hug and saying it’s gonna be ok. L
Kind of agree. Still pretty funny tho. Jokes would have worked better with a different crowd.
I'm glad my wife of 17 years has been the best communicator I've ever met.
Here's to comedy, but also not listening to a 4 month long married, 30 something years ago lady. 😆
This didn't come across as comedy to me, and I love Dry Bar.
Hilarious. I needed to laugh today
TRUTH
Lisa, I haven't seen many women comics that I enjoy. You are funny!! I really enjoyed watching you. You are great!!
This lady is smart and funny and if you like comedy you have to check out Rita Rudner!!!!
21:30 Hey, I *have* a first grade education! Sure, I've got 12 more years *after* but I received and excelled in first grade!
Tough crowd. She's funny and they don't know it.
Can't blame the crowd...
Rather funny, Some insightful stuff. Still makes me glad that I am a single man XD
So funny. Bible and marriage jokes push the envelop at Dry Bar. :)
Wow, reading these comments it seems that many men can't take a joke.
She is great comic with the ability to find humor where many cannot.
Just the title in itself is funny. Hope this is good.
Really enjoyed your set! Liked and shared 🙌🏼🙌🏼😂😂😂😂
I can respect a Christian comic with clean jokes, tough crowd though.
The crowd wasn’t tough it’s just that she wasn’t funny. It was more of a “Why I think men are stupid” seminar.
@@ahelpinghandtony4465 - No, it was GREAT stuff, Tony. It was EDGY comedy, she might have actually been Lenny Bruce in Drag. That is one brave young lady, because that hyper-religious crowd could have really turned on her in a heartbeat, but they didn't.
Thank God.
Utah is one of the few states in the US that can and does have sheriffs and policemen that hang around in venues like Dry Bar waiting to arrest people for dirty words and immoral ideas coming from the stage, or drinking in any form. Lisa would have likely been immediately arrested if she would have called men "Bast*rds" in her act.
The Provo, Utah cops AND the Utah State Patrol would have rushed her, "taken her to the ground", roughed her up and arrested her. I understand that such was their plan, they had heard about her routine.
One little slip and she'd be in jail tonight, just like Lenny Bruce.
I think she did an excellent job, them Mormons can be a very, very TOUGH crowd.
@@ahelpinghandtony4465 Agree, I didn't find her very funny. It just seemed like a bunch of amateurish jokes. The one about peruvian and the joke being about the people not laughing was dumb cuz it wasn't actually funny. It wasn't even dad-joke level funny, it was just like she couldn't come up with anything better.
@@syberphish Yep that was very cringey of her.
We all got the joke, calling us stupid for not laughing at it was a pretty good indicator that she is used to bombing.
Some comedians have built it into their act to make excuses for a lack of laughter.
I bet she is very glad that you can't see downvotes any longer.
As usual i read all the comments and it's clear that not many found her funny.
@@brucelarsen6650 I agree with you! I don't understand how some people choose not to see how Lisa jokes about herself, jokes about men, jokes about women, jokes about the silliness of LA, jokes about relationships, jokes about her faith... and she has to have a great amount of faith to share her journey in a hilarious and vulnerable way! Lenny Bruce in drag! I think that's funny. haha! Hilarious Lisa!
Suddle... Maybe he used auto correct 😂😂😂
She didn't cure my gift of singleness :/
Loved your show!
* joke about valet parking..
* joke about skin colors..
"I'm from L.A. !!!"
yes, we can tell.. 😐😐
Well I'm pretty sure drybar wouldn't let her talk about her junk so she probably didn't have much material to work with
@@LANCEtheBOIL come on, you don't know that about her. She shares her testimony, why are you assuming she wants to talk about her junk? Geez, so judgy
Don't be regionalist. You wouldn't like me rolling my eyes because you're from Utah. Or bring up what state searches men kissing most. Be nice and people might be nice back.
@@becominghero9754 uh-oh! I might catch "the gays"?? Thanks for letting me know!
(not from Utah, bro..)
I saw the same thing! I think She didn’t name this “how to stay single” 😂 I think Dry Bar saw how much of a flop she is so they made *HER the joke* 😂😂 well played 👏👏
She need to go back to them cocktail party comedies in the hills lady!
Never ever cheated pore you pretty lady.
how do we donate?
Click on the "Thanks" with the dollar sign in a heart -- if you hover your mouse pointer over the link, the pop up description is "Show support with Super Thanks" -- and the rest should be easy to follow.
Wow
Great set !! Keep on going....
You owe me $5 for encouraging marriage .
Lmao @willie
Actually Lisa, AA is the cheapest therapy because it's only a buck minimum if you choose to give anything! ~ 😛
Very gutsy to do a lot of those jokes in front of a mostly Mormon crowd. Well written jokes and edgy for Dry Bar. Great stuff. It was weird that no one clapped when she said she became a Christian when she was pregnant. God wants us to turn to him no matter where we are in life. Jesus came to save the lost, not the ‘Found.’ God loves imperfect people because they recognize they need help. And, yes, us men are bad guessers. We need help ladies 😂. PS - with that said, she is really intense, that would take a special man to be compatible with.
100% agree with your whole statement.
since she brought dating sites up she should sign up on one as a man then she gets to see and read what women say and pictures they use she doesn't have to post a picture which means she will get picture requests she will get all kinds of stuff for her comedy act enjoyed the show dry bar let her know what i said thanks
She's so funny😂
😊
Applause! Women talk code for sure
Playing a " third generation single mom... LA-woke ethnic diversity is great...interracial marriage is good " schtick is a tough act to sell in Mormon Provo, Utah. Also, she doesn't string the jokes together...they are disjointed. She's got some work to do.
yeah you gotta know your crowd
Sarcasm is illegal in Utah?
Mormons get upset no matter the race because they're not Mormon... Pretty sure even provo is woke enough for interracial marriage. Been all over and you'll find more hate in Georgia or Florida than Provo... Don't think Mormons wanna go back to Jim Crow....
@@bayoubilly5176 : Quite a few young people are not leaving the church.
A LOT of work to do. And yes if she was smarter she could've modified her act for the crowd, even a little.
Not geometree. It’s trigitnometree
Apparently she's an anchor babia 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂
I don't know why all the haters here, maybe too many snowflakes. I thought she was great!
I agree, Paul. I especially loved the parts of her set where you could glimpse a bit, a glimmer 'o murder in them pretty, pretty eyes.
No. Tell her to calm down and be ready to block the kick. You don’t need a cup.
What is a father?
What's a father?
Delivery off just a little.
no good = PASS
Everyone knows where Peru is because earthquakes have put them on the map 😗
Many of us knew even before that since, in the olden days, we had something called "geography" in grade school . And even "social studies" in grade school and jr. high. And even "world history", along with "U.S. history" in h.s. Of course that was when homework was a big thing too.
I agree with you! Most people nowadays don’t know where any country except Mexico and Canada are! They don’t even know the names of the continents!!!😱
Ohhhhh... I get it now. PERU, that place way down South somewhere.
I was thinking Peruvia was somewhere next to Canadia.
@@brucelarsen6650 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
This could have been 20 min of knock knock jokes and I wouldn't have noticed the difference. I think the jokes were there but the delivery could have been more thought out and got more laughs.
oh oh......dont check my new page out........i'm more of a writer
mamasita