What narcissists envy the most about you
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- čas přidán 23. 02. 2024
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Narcissistic abuse looks like:
Lack of Empathy: Narcissists often show little to no empathy for others, making it easy for them to manipulate and exploit. Narcissists use various tactics such as gaslighting, love bombing, and devaluation to control and dominate their victims.
Common Tactics Used in Narcissistic Abuse:
Gaslighting: Making the victim doubt their own reality and sanity.
Love Bombing: Showering the victim with excessive attention and affection to gain control.
Devaluation: Undermining the victim’s self-worth through criticism, belittling, and emotional neglect.
Isolation: Cutting the victim off from their support systems to increase dependency on the abuser.
Triangulation: Using others to create jealousy or competition, keeping the victim feeling insecure.
Healing from Narcissistic Abuse
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They hate the good in you, they have no empathy or real love in them.
❤❤great point
Exactly
I think they have found a person who is just not geared to tackle the subtle hate toward them.
That's a demonic thing . .. Wow
I think the number one thing they are envious of is authenticity.
Quite right 👍🏻
I agree completely
In the last couple of years, it really started to bother my husband that anyone we met or socialized with always enjoyed me more. When we host them, they bring me a gift not him. And I would explain to him that he had no hobbies or interests, so what would they even bring? I however am an excellent cook, make a beautiful home, garden, etc. So they were always a plethora of things that people liked to bring me. Towards the end it was all he could do to mask his anger at me, his jealousy. Several times when super drunk, he would look at me and a bit threateningly say, “my friends like me… But they like you more”. And that is the catch 22 of being with a narcissist. Very high expectations for you, but if you fulfill them and other people notice, you’ve just shown them up, instead of made them look even better. Wish me luck. Divorce papers were filed last week and I am ready to be done. Never see that dick again.
It's definitely of spiritual nature.
And creativity.
They’re jealous of your authentic confidence
Yes!!!! Agreed it freaks them out!
narcissists are the definition of fake confidence. so when you talk from a genuine place they feel threatned because they are insecure of losing their shine.
genuine confidence takes real work, health, personal development and life effort. a virtue they wish for but they wont work for. its a shame.
That part.
Perfectly said
That's whyvtheyblower your sel esteem. Easy
They hate you for being what they can never be, real. They are empty, miserable shells.
❤❤
Empty shells
And then when you walk away they say you never loved them, they call you crazy and unreasonable. Even 20 years of striving to please them, a life serving and giving was not enough for them...they want total and complete submission, groveling and apologies for....for what? existing?. It's madness...
Absolute exhausting madness.
Even after 30 years. It was so mentally, emotionally, and physically damaging and exhausting.
31 years here, I know, it is so strange and demonic, it makes no sense at all. But it caused me to be completely exhausted for years after leaving him. But now, I am 100% healed praise God!
It's purely demonic.
Yes they want you to apologize for their madness. It's nuts
They have envy if we resist lowering ourselves to their depressing level.
Facts
🎯
They are envious of people whom have a soul.
They envy our ability to be happy
most
Truly content and satisfied with very little. They can never feel that.
They truly hate it to see us happy
Yeah if is real and not a mask.
They envy anything and everything you have. Even a $1 coupon from CVS will leave them envious for days.
Omg, that's funny!! And oh so true
😂😂😂😂😂
lol...so true
So true!! My mother envied me for getting some free stuff online using vouchers.
😂😂
He hated me because I loved our children that he had no feelings for.
Same here. And somehow my children, who he has no feelings for, adore him and disregard me. Go figure.
Love for animals I was always accused for.
They don't know how to connect and want to at all costs. It's the lonliest feeling in the world to have no peace in private or in public unless it is amidst some temporary high or toxic episode.
My brother would get so angry and irritated when I had to care for my children and pay attention to them instead of him. Only the worst people alive want to compete with actual children for attention.
@@trumpeterswan4177 My therapist said this is absolute classic behavior because they know deep down he doesn’t care. We are the “safe” parent. In their minds its ok to be shitty to us because are certainly imperfect but we stayed and loved anyway.
I even called out a pastor over this. He called his own mother (who raised him +6 alone) names and said she was a narcissist. Dad abandoned them. Who’s the narcissist!? He refused to discuss it with me. Very sad state of being and doing.
They are envious of your original true self
They envy that you’re a whole person whether you’re poor or rich. They depend on supply, you do not. You have a soul, you enjoy the breeze, the singing of the birds, the beauty of the flowers. Your ability to be yourself, to be at peace in challenging situations, your spirituality. You have depth, they’re empty.
They See God’s Light Upon My Life
Bingo!
I stayed home for 14 years, raising our three kids. He would say “I wish I could stay home all day and do nothing.” It was weird to me that he was mad at a life he was able to afford us, instead of being proud that he could provide for his wife and kids, he was angry that he had to, he was mad at me and the kids for existing.
The thing to understand is most men at work feel like slaves who have controlling bosses over them to make a "living" so they take their stress out on the people they feel are forcing them to do this.
Sorry that you had to live that lie he told you for so long and didn't get recognition for all you did. Hope things continue to improve for you and you see your value!
Wow, I heard the same thing. It must be nice to stay home all day and… oh let’s see the list 10 miles long you and I could make together of all the love we pour into our homes and children, just to be devalued.
I too am sorry you had to endure all of that abuse. These people have no honor.
I am getting some creepy ugly vibes from the original comment. Something is off.
They’re envious that you don’t require much to make you hapoy
Jealousy is wanting something someone else has. ENVY is different. Envy is not wanting someone to have the something they have. They don't want it - they just don't want YOU to have it.
My narcissistic siblings to a T!
Jealousy is to want to be in someone's situation. Envy is hatred for someone for having something or being something...
And both are super creepy and weird.
Envy is not damaging to others, jealousy will
Tear you apart. You got that totally right
I think envy is wanting what another has .
They always say “ you think you’re better than everybody else!” Pure projection!
😂😂😂 I know...
Been there heard that.
They envy anything and everything. It's always something. If one thing goes away, they find something else. They are just sick, screwed up, insecure, and irredeemable. It never gets better, the more it changes the more it stays the same. They can't be fixed. Just save yourself and walk away.
Your joy, happiness mostly your Anointing! You stand out, people are attracted to you. Your outgoing, easy going, nothing bothers you. Your comfortable in any situation. Uniqueness!
Exactly!!!
👍 Exactly 💯
Envious of your good Godly spirit
Bingo!
I got attacked for my clothes too. And my interests. My employment.
I am not surprised and then I thought this is petty of them. But I have been attacked for cloths,personal qualities and how I manage my money.😢😢😢
I resonate
They’re envious of sanity; sound mental health.
They are envious of many things. Your personality, your authenticity, your emotions, your creativity, your light, and your love.
Envious of my light✨️
You have a human soul. They have a void vortex.
A narciscistic person is envious of everone and everything !!
The narcissist envies the target when they are at peace, engaged in an activity that requires skill a narcissist doesn't have, or succeeding at something the narcissist has already tried to sabotage.
They especially hate you when THEY'RE way more skilled than you are, yet you get better results.
It's the #favourofgod and there's nothing they can do about it, because they dismiss the power of God.
Too bad, too sad.
I don't even like that competitiveness vibe... I get around some people and I'm not running the same race they are😢
Trust me run when you feel that. Speaking from experience it never ever ends well. Energy doesn’t lie. Now I run for the hills. They could have a lot and they’ll still be jealous of the little one has or just your smile
They envy us because we're truth tellers , we're honest, faithful and love. Everything they don't have
They envy you for the quality they might have had at one time but lost, gave away, or sold for a handful of silver pieces- authenticity. They sold their souls for fame, social favor, material gain, or let their gifts go to waste. I had none of the trappings, but I kept my head on my shoulders and went on with my life. All of the narcs I cast out of my life had all the trappings - good paying jobs, homes, cars, money in the bank, social acceptance, on and on. None of that means anything when you sell your soul to the devil.
Narcissist jealous of Self love 😊
They hate that we are not fake like them
They don't want you to have one happy peaceful moment and that's what it's all about, because they're miserable.
They don't want your love, but your life! ❤ They will kill you at once if they can walk, or they'll kill you little by little: every day your body and your soul wither away bc they will put you down like you're good for nothing and not worthy to live.
Maybe #1 thing they'ew envious for is their need of other people for them to "exist" and they see us as independent, self directed people who feed ourselves from within.
That is so true. That's one thing that I learned from H.G. Tudor. Narcissists have an emptiness inside that always need to be filled... by using the "fuel" that they get from manipulating or hurting others. We don't need that and our independence infuriates them.
❤
Insightful comment. Thank you.
They hate our ability to be genuine when they can't be.
He hated my voice, told me to shut up, to not sing.
wow F that
Narcissists are nothing but ego and the ego only wants to want.
Don't forget that the narcissist's ego is also extremely fragile and unable to accept even constructive criticism.
What they don't have is what they want
Sadly, what they desire is ultimately unachievable. It cannot be quenched, cannot be satiated.
and what they have, they ruin.
@@susanjones8489 very true, we could've had a good thing ✌️❤️
Your assurance and confidence. That's the envy.
My honesty & authenticity.... he can't stand it.
They also hate people who are Happy in their life. Because they are miserable and misery loves company.
This is so true. They hate people who have true contentment, happiness, and a real personality. Your art work or talent ect etc just rubs it in for them. Run from them and never ever go back.
Cause I CAN BE my authentic self
Without being concerned about prestige 🤣
This message really helped. Thank you. I graduated with a BA in opera performance in 1999. I was always too loud for my family. My x literally told me he was the reason I stopped singing. Not long ago I retrieved all my vocal music from the attic where it sat for over 20 years.
Just a few weeks ago I banged out some notes on the piano.
Oddly enough my name means song. Singing is such a part of me- my soul expression. All the narcs were envious of me- and my loud song! And the more I sing, the happier I am.
Find your voice- the way you express yourself- and let yourself say so. Your life will have a happy ring to it.
They wanted to silence you.
I am a former singer too. My family is similar. I have trained my son, he is a singer now, and very successful.
Last comment I got was 'it's funny how he was turned out this amazing when you have never done anything'
I have had a long career, recordings and all. They know, but always pretend they are better than me and I am a loser. They tell me to my face, in front of my son.
I am done
Confidence, Not needing material things to be happy, and being independent just to name a FEW. These people are incredible 🙄
THIS!!
This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine!!!
To the point they would kill a child to get the attention of the mother?
@@JoanieDavenport-ot7fm Absolutely
Creative life force energy, connection to Spirit:Soul:God.
I gave up my business (multi mill biz), my marriage, home, cars, dogs, friends, clothes, lifestyle, travel.
And then my health.
Nearly my sanity.
Still envious.
Now, I’m bringing it all back.
Solid.as.a.fucking.rock.
The no. one thing these toxic individuals envy is the light .. love. Simple, pure love. Genuine kindness and empathy.
I've studied this question all my life before I ever even knew the word "narcissism". I was able to trace all narcissistic 'deeds' back to the 7 deadly sins, mainly ENVY. Envious of what? My theory was "Personal Contentment". Close, no?
IMO they’re jealous of the resilience, and of not relying on others for supply, unlike them.
They envy our rich and deep inner world.
Don't dim our lights so they can shine brighter the narcs😂
If you are a Christian I think it is your love of God is what drives their envy and their urge to destroy you.
We are children of God. It makes them hate us.. hence their jealousy/ envy
I think they are envy when they see genuine happy people
Kevin that was a fantastic analogy. I'm seven months out of a eight year relationship with a female covert narcissist. She was jealous of the great relationship that I had with her granddaughter. I wasn't allowed to have friends over. I couldn't even listen to any of my favorite music because I enjoyed it too much. We took a trip to Portugal with a tour group, and she was jealous of the way I blended with people in the group and would try to put me down in front of them. In my opinion, they are jealous of us because we can give and receive love. You are brilliant brother. With sincere respect.
Before I knew there was such a thing as "narcissism", I walked away from our mother and christened her "Miss Information, the Queen of Envy". I was 46 years old and concluded that no matter how hard I tried to win her love and approval, she became even more determined to envy, despise, backbite, demean, etc.
I believe she was born with the genetic propensity to be envious and oppositional, and her antics were checked by her parents with physical and emotional abuse, which only made her recalcitrant, more belligerent, more envious. Sticking around only fed her supply in my presence. Walking away didn't stop the supply, but I wasn't there to deal with her crap.
Mom tried to pass her pathological problem on to all her children, and she seemed to succeed with at least one of her children.
My story exactly...but both siblings and mom... flipped my life upside at 48.
I tell you what they will absolutely loathe you for - if you’re in better shape than them. They despise if your liked and receive positive attention from others for your personality or charisma.
They envy other's joy and happiness
It’s no surprise. Because we live in a world that is groomed to be codependent and validation seeking. So, when a narcissistic person crosses paths with you and you’re not desperate for approval, from someone or anyone, they wonder just WTF is going on here. They’ll think of you as arrogant and they may aim to fix that.
You have a point there. I have listened to some videos of psychopaths saying they get enraged with their victims because they believe (in their paranoid mind and messed up way of thinking) they have to "correct" them, I mean "teaching them a lesson" which reminds me of the book and movie "The shinning". Stephen King did a good job describing psycho mindset. Torrance had to "correct" his family. They proyect their arrogancy onto others in their satanist way.
Genuine goodness in others.
Empaths c carry a lot of light, the Holy Spirit, and the narc demon cannot stand that.
In my opinion the main thing they are envious of is that YOU HAVE A SOUL AND THEY DONT! They know u are a child of the most high and they are a child of the evil one. They know who u are when they encounter u but until u get the awakening and education about NPD and open your spiritual eye, U dont know who they are or what you are dealing with. And u are right ive had narcs who were less and more successful hate on me. They hate up, down, sideways and around. They envy that you have a soul, are at peace, can genuinely be happy and comfortable in your own skin. They envy that because they are the inverse of all of that. When they encounter u, they can sense your energy and know u have a soul and the programming kicks in AUTOMATICALLY FOR THEM TO NOT LIKE U, BE JEALOUS OF U AND ATTACK U. U not knowing the wiser cant figure out why they are so hostile to u. But honestly they just envy everything. Even the smallest insignificant things like your teeth is whiter ir your farts stink slightly less. lol EVERYTHING IS A COMPETITION AND HIERARCHY TO THEM!
They are envious of the broken. If they are jealous of me who came from abuse, there is something really wrong here.
It has to be what comes from the brokenness,...the hand of God..they must hate that God calls us blameless and righteous just cause He can...
@@BooThing14 Never thought of it that way, but good point.
No they probably picked you because they saw that you are already vulnerable. They can't control someone if they're super strong. They must use you for their supply!
They know how empty they are. They envy your depth, your heart.
I THINK THEY ARE ENVIOUS OF THE CONFIDENCE, THE PEACE WE THE CHOSEN PEOPLE OF GOD HAVE INSIDE, WHETHER WE ARE IN A DIFFICULT TIME OR NOT, WE STAY CONFIDENT, HOPEFUL, FAITH FILLED AND BELIEVING IN GOD
Do NOT LET YOURSELF CONTROLLED BY ANYONE.
Oh hell no I run my life not anyone else
😂 I loved the unconventional way you delivered that message.
I think I realize now why my X hub was so angry at me all the time. I think he was mad that I could love people and he couldn't.
I am nothing without God..... Then they're jealous of God because he blessed me with all this because I'm God's child if they even knew him they wouldn't act like that!
Amen sister!
Oh my gosh!!! It all makes sense now!! I never knew why they were so hateful and angry at me!! This it it!! It was jealousy!!! I had to become almost like a zombie in their presence so that they wouldn't be triggered by my presence. So sad.... I nearly lost myself, the essence of who I am, because I wasn't allowed to be me 😢 U wasn't allowed to have things I had to hide things that I bought or they would get jealous and run out there and buy themselves one or an even better more expensive one... If I told them my goals and dreams, they would set out to do the exact same thing but would try to do it even better!! Unbelievable!! I never knew the basis of it was jealousy!! Now I know! Thank you Kevin 😊❤🎉
They’veenvious of your ability to be honest!
I think the one thing they envy most would be the self-esteem they see in others but lack themselves. Self-esteem will give other people a sense of comfort and satisfaction that narcissists lack
Envious of another's Happiness...mine searched through my bag my young 10 year old told me whilst at the hospital.. Wanted to find just what it was that made me happy... It wasn't anything....in the bag 😂 It's our Happiness 😊
After he took everything I cared about including the grandbabies and I snapped out of the suicidal mindset and refused to attack back. Be became unhinged and more serious than all 30 years combined he came up and stated,"I CAN'T STAND TO SEE YOU HAPPY - I HAVE TO LEAVE". but instead he found a way to have me jailed and I lost my home and anything else he picked through before I cleaned up the mess.
The system isn't designed to support the honest.
The system promotes and price narcissists and competition. It's materialistic.
I understand this. You are strong.
I think it is the fact that God has managed to create Light, Mankind and Life itself better than He has initially intended. Narcissists are always seeking to disable the three things. -To belittle the Glory of God... Thank You!!:))!!
our joy
You nailed it. From 6000+yer old scripture to the digital age. Envy does not need a specific reason. It doesn’t matter what you say, do, feel, or own, it’s you the narcissist wants control over. And that’s what they can never have again.
I love your style Kevin! I felt like we were playing strip Poker there for a minute 🤣 but I get this powerful message.
THEIR OWN PRESPECTIVES OF REJECTION, INSECURITIES-NO SELF LOVE... JUST A MESS!!!!!😶
The ability to find something to understand and appreciation in everyone.
Great message. When one has been with a narcissist for a long time, it causes that person to compromise and act differently than their true self. Thanks for this and for reminding me to be my authentic self at all times no matter what!
The cellphone story is why I immediately stop new friendships, or romantic relationships, when constant critics, towards me, arises very early in the getting to know process. I also would end the process when the person is criticizing other people constantly. It’s a sign of a soul with very low standards for herself and for others. When you criticize others you always criticize yourself too…
Learning that as well.
You flippin better know it!!!! Narcissists are nothing but bullies!!! Be comfortable in your own skin!!! Love your own fashion!!! Be you, wild and free!!!!
🍃❤Love from Texas❤🍃
Your goodness that is apparent to all.Fly your flag. It just doesn’t matter!!
Cain had to suck up all the energy in the room, like any other narcissist.
When I thought my soon to be ex narc multiple addiction philandering husband was human, but damaged, versus a psycho, I would ask him why he incarnated. Because it was obvious all he cared about was vices. He would complain about his debilitating anxiety and crippling insomnia and I finally just started asking him what he needed to probably do to resolve that because I didn’t have that problem. I slept like a baby. He was obsessed with TV, but I think he really just used it as an opportunity to escape in the fantasies into his head while watching Jeopardy. In fact one time I told him that being with him was like visiting grandpa at the nursing home, even though my grandpa had never been at a nursing home and never watched Jeopardy. But that being married to him felt like being married to an old person, because he had so little to talk about and no interests or hobbies beyond golf gambling and vices. I see now why it infuriated him, even though he never expressed anger. Practically everything I said pointed out how much of a demonic robot he was. So I think they hate that you have peace of mind, a reason for being here, therefore meaning and can entertain yourself.
Great insights, Kevin! They hate self-acceptance in others, self-acceptance without arrogance, a sense of superiority, or fanfare, with or without the "shiny" things - including their approval.
That self-acceptance of yours is taken as you thinking you are perfect and they have a huge problem with that. They have to thrash it, to destroy it.
🌟🙌🏼 wish I understood this years ago!!! All true! No lies told ;) ❤
😂😂 you took your shirt off!!!
I didn't do it that way. after being verbally attacked by the narc I said, "If im so terrible, why are you here??"
Love it. I told mine, if I'm so terrible, be thankful you aren't married to me or your life would be a living hell. Then I left. He had the gall to tell me "let me know when you are ready to get married" that was 34 years ago and I suspect he is sitting home alone marinating in his filth watching porn as a 75 year old now. I am so blessed to have the life I have had after that experience.
I find two types of people surround me: the envious (shit talkers - never to my face lol) and the admirers (encouragers and encouraged - to my face). The latter groups are genuine people who are not threatened by our strengths and pursuits, whilst the envious ones are deeply insecure and cannot help but have contempt for those who are happy and finding success, in whatever they pursue. My method of dealing with them is to smile, keep kind and "be wise as serpents and harmless as doves". Keep them an arms distance away, whilst maintaining a gentle spirit. Do not become like them. Do not bite back... what did Jesus do? He maintained his calm and turned around and walked away.
strong character
That is Deep but so so true….happened to me …phone, laptop, tablet, clothes everything….it was not enough , not good enough
Narcissists spend all their time and energy on trying to make the world fit their imaginary alternate reality, so when they see others existing harmoniously, reciprocally, happily and adaptively in actual reality, they are envious of that.
They are envious that your mind is at rest and not in turmoil.
The number 1 thing that is the underlying factor with narcs is they're extremely insecure.
LOL on hiding your phone, I just bought a new car and hiding it from an envious friend for as long as I can.
They are envious because of our authentic, carefree, simple life. We live our lives in confidence & with very few regrets. After watching the other part of your video - I would add - our inner peace with ourselves ( this is a huge one )
When my Narc roommate got jealous I was dating she would try to make me feel bad about looking good when I went out. I just started dressing better and better until she called her Karen mom to come to the house and have a meltdown. I was glad to know someone who’s whole personality was her looks was jealous of mine 🤷🏻♀️ Instant Karma
I am definitely not me without my wish to do the best for others and for the world...I guess narcissists do not really get it. Thank You, Master!!💯%!!
So true . May GOD keep us in our purpose to serve HIM by helping our fellow human beings to strive towards the Light Amen 🙏❤❤
They envy lightheartedness, true faith, glee and childlike qualities
They envy your light, goodness
Your beautiful spirit