r/Trueoffmychest My Wife is a Serial Shoplifter
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- čas přidán 25. 07. 2024
- Podcast: open.spotify.com/show/3hJo9o8...
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0:00 Intro
0:09 Cheating husband
9:37 Reverse pickpocket
11:31 Serial shoplifter
13:57 Comment
"Sneaky Snitch" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) License: CC By Attribution 3.0 - Komedie
In the first story, Jake is Jess's brother, not the husband's, and it was one of the moms that created the slideshow and showed it to Jess and Tyler in a meeting with Tyler's parents and Jess's parents. Op was already safely at her dad's cabin with the kids and Jake. And one of the reasons op is going for full custody is because Tyler threatened to kill her and their kids while he was going crazy
OMG i didn’t think it couldn’t get any worse but you going into more detail 😭🙌🏽
So this is going form bad to worse?
Thanks for clarifying things!
I hope OP had video or written evidence of Tyler threatening to kill the kids, no court would allow him even visitation if shown that
I'm glad I'd heard the story first on Smosh because of those details. The Moms were VICIOUS and it's so nice that OP has that support at least.
The fact that your husband was cheating on you contradicts the idea that he was your rock and had your back through it all
Im guessing there were signs but Op's dad situation and her husband being "loving" blinded her from them
@@aentnbviously he was love-bombing her so that way she never suspect anything plus her dad was taking up enough of her attention to notice the love bombing
@@madambutterfly1997obviously with two kids and a third on the way her husband asking her to be a sahm. Implies he is successful in his career. It’s a prestigious enough position that he’s developed a “God Complex”. I say that by the anger he exhibited when came out. Also, how it’s everyone else’s fault. The lunging/blaming at Jess and the begging followed by threats at his STBXW. Essentially, he’s a “cake eater”.
Hey now, clearly someone else having his dick doesn't stop him from having her back, lol.
But seriously though, most people you depend on are not putting their dick in you. You can have someone's back without screwing them or them not screwing someone else.
After the fact, maybe not so much but later is not then.
Just because you're not there for them in moment 2 doesn't mean you weren't there in moment 1.
Clearly what he was doing was good enough for her in that moment, what he may or may not have been doing in the background is irrelevant.
You're trying to gaslight her into believing it wasn't even though she demonstrably thought otherwise.
Feelings after the fact don't change the ones you had in the past.
Overall he's not a good person but for her he was good enough at that time.
Think of it more like a leaning on a literal rock. Just because you thought the rock was sandstone and it turns out to be shale that later slides apart doesn't mean you weren't able to lean against it to rest during that one hike 5 months ago.
She is painting a picture of why it was so shocking to find out he was cheating. Basically saying it wasn’t like he was an abusive person who worked long hours and threw up a bunch of red flags prior to her finding out.
First Story: Wow, I feel sooo bad for OP. Not only is she losing her dad, she is losing her family because her scumbag of a husband and trash bestfriend decided go have an affair behind OP's back WHILE OP is prego and dealing with the thought of her dying dad. OP deserves so much better than this. Lmaoooo Tyler's reaction is hilarious to me. This man has the nerve to lash out like this when HIS choices caused all of this, it wasn’t just Jess' fault he is at fault because he could’ve told Jess (if she pursued him) "no I’m married" or if he pursued her, he could’ve NOT pursued her. Now Jess, the absolute audacity of this woman to try and play victim and demand OP fix the situation? Why should OP clean up the mess SHE caused?! OP is the victim here, Tyler and Jess needs to face the consequences of their actions and live with it. I hope OP (in time of course) gets with Jake at some point. Jake sounds like Tyler without the betrayal
Second Story: This family is wholesome af. Reverse pickpocketing is a first for me though lol but this family is just insanely wholesome
Third Story: OP is too kind because I wouldn’t be as supportive if my partner is a serial shoplifter. This story reminds me of a time I went to the supermarket to help my mother's friend get groceries (I was just holding bags) and as we was about to walk out the security guard stopped us and confronted the friend. Appearantly she tried to steal something out the store. Thankfully the security guard knew I was completely unaware of her theft (nor was trying to help her steal) and just let me stand at the front of the exit. She kept saying she "forgot" and was making excuse after excuse
Comment: So did the wife think that the neighbors wouldn’t notice their stolen chairs on the porch?
You took the words out of my mouth. And also why do people steal when they have money though it makes no sense!
@oliviajeanne7709 if I had to guess, it's the rush. It is an actual addiction for people like this.
I think she should stay as far from her husband's family as possible, dating-wise. There is so much emotional baggage there, and it opens up a lot more heartache for OP in the future. Sucks, but for her well-being, she needs to stay away from the brother, and least from where I see things.
@@TheMrMojoRisin67 Although this could still be messy Jake is the brother of her ex best friend Jesse not her soon to be ex husband Tyler
@@oliviajeanne7709it's most likely kleptomania
For the husband of the klepto, I can tell y'all why: the rush. Yes, I used to be a klepto myself, and I went to therapy for it. The feeling of leaving a store with stolen merchandise was addictive. The klepto wife definitely needs therapy like I did.
Wow thank you for sharing that.
Same, except I never went to therapy I just one day decided to quit while I was ahead and hadn't gotten caught. Wasn't shoplifting though, it was full on B&E home invasion during the day. Mainly for the money because even working 3 jobs I was still faced with homelessness, but the thrill definitely kept me going after I'd gotten myself out of the hole. Working at three separate restaurants in Chicago wasn't enough to live off, unlike hocking jewelry. And if you only take what you can turn around quickly, you're not likely to take anything that would truly be missed. You're just not gonna be able to sell a $50,000 diamond like you could a handful of gold chains.
@@stevenandcarminabeedle9089 You're welcome.
@@adamb89 I had already gotten caught (luckily I was a minor), which is why I was pushed to go to therapy. I actually got worse after I started going, but then one day I made the conscious decision to stop. Mostly because I came to the realization that, if I got caught again, then I would do some time in juvenile detention and get shunned by my family. I loved the rush of lifting various articles of clothing from various stores in my area, but I love my family - and my freedom - more. I'm glad you came to the same realization.
@@adamb89I had a therapist but I never talk to her about that, I solved this one on my own
Gotta love a wholesome story! giving surprise money is almost as good as that brother would write his little sister sweet notes "from mom" or the little sister who gave brother a dollar in his pocket if he was sad.
Prior to hearing that second story, I never thought I would ever hear a story about a good addiction.
No kidding
I mean, it's only bad of it starts negatively affecting the OP.
@@transsnackYep. It brings them all joy lol I love it so much!
The reverse pickpocketing story is the sweetest cutest thing I think I've ever heard and it made me cry happy tears. I love this
It's kinda wild, in Germany, the first woman wouldn't have quit her job, and the state would have paid for daycare.
That's a right, actually. Last year a woman sued the government because she wasn't assigned daycare despite making every effort to get it, and was awarded a ton of money.
But… but … that's CoMmuNisM!1!
Here in Canada we have decent maternity/paternity leave. We're still rolling out a national daycare program, so it's far from universal still.
Yah daycare, (childcare) can be your biggest expense here in the US.
Here in the States, I didn’t work when my kid was a baby/toddler because it would have cost more than I made to put him in daycare.
But then I made less money when I went back to work because I hadn’t been working those few years.
Stay at home moms don't exist in Germany? How would you know how someone in such a terrible situation would react in this or that country
The US only cares about a baby til its born.
Story 1: Dude, OP's husband isn't just trash, he's an absolute scum of the earth. OP about to lose her dad is bad enough for her already, and this a-hole of a husband decides to make it worse by having an affair, while OP IS PREGNANT and still having her dying dad in her mind. Dude, I really feel sorry for OP, she honestly doesnt deserve this at all.
And not only that, he did it with her best friend too and they had the gall of mocking her too. And then the husband trashed their place and was basically willing to beat up a dying cancer patient with a baseball bat too like it was OPs fault.
But when rSlash said Diablo 4.....come on you can't deny he sounds like a happy kid
And the way he convinced OP to quit her job so she was fully financially reliant on him while he's over here cheating with multiple women is insane. He was really trying to have the whole cake and eat it too.
Don't forget about her best friend.
Same. She sounds strong and sensible though.
One thing I don't get though, why did Tyler rush in anger at Jessica when the presentation happened? I don't get that.
Also, the brother... there's no way she should ever go there. She needs to be better than that. It might have been nice for her shattered ego to hear though.
Unfortunately, kleptomania is an actual disorder. Wife needs therapy to learn the tools to work through the urges
Yeah she needs therapy not prison
It can’t be kleptomania because then she’d steal random items she didn’t need. She’s stealing things she wants. Kleptomaniacs steal for the thrill. She’s stealing food and furniture
@@nationalinstituteofcheese3012not true and as someone with this disorder please don't speak for me unless you have the disorder and even then it's different for each person the level of control that you have over it is different for every person just like other mental disorders you wouldn't say oh that person has depression so they can't have a job and they just sit in their bed all day because it's not true for everyone with depression
@@spazaroo1000 question can psych experts talk about how they help people solve it and how it works too? (Not an expert but like wondering if the experts are allowed to as well)
@@justsomeguy1695 seriously?
We should give all thieves threapy then 💀💀
2nd story: My wife does this to me every now and then.I’ll find a $20 bill in my wallet so I can buy stuff at yard sales 😂
So sweet!
Story 1: That is a serious stab to the heart. OP is pregnant, her father is dying, and then she learns that her husband is cheating on her with her best friend (and others, apparently).
It sounds like the two were wearing a mask the whole time and OP presenting the texts finally ripped those masks off. Tyler is unstable, Jess is absolutely insane, and OP is out of there
*And* her asshole husband just convinced her to quit her job! She’s at such a vulnerable point in her life and the two people closest to her (except her father) stabbed her in the back. Good thing the in-laws and the AP’s parents had her back.
Edit: *And* the BIL just dropped an emotional bomb on her?! Jeez, OP can’t catch a break!!
and I got a feeling that the best friend and husband was already smash before OP found out even those she said it be go on for 4 months which I believe it was long then that and see how both their parents disowned them and they switch blame it OP who just expose them
I can't imagine how shocking that must've been for her to find out. Not only does she discover the people she loved and trusted are deceitful and liars, but her entire future she imagined was wiped. That's a lot to take in.
She sounds strong and sensible though. And I love how she introduced to everyone what she'd discovered.
I am so glad that her in-laws stomped that garbage human of a husband into the ground and her best friend's father stomped her too.
Second story: this family is too precious and must be protected ❤
I know, right? Their story made me smile!
I will never understand why cheaters have the nerve to feel like they are the victims, when they are facing the consequences of their wrongful actions, and go after the true victim to just “forgive them and fix the situation for them”. This is truly infuriating!
💯
It's great to see when the family of cheaters hold them accountable.
Right it’s a breath of fresh air
Yeah, there are far too many stories of parents siding with cheaters because of grandchildren, or, even worse, because it's "true love" and saying the person cheated on has to get over it.
@@akl2k7 Ugh, the ones where the one betrayed is told to get over it, especially when the other person has been someone close to them, gives me huge anger.
Anyone who has been cheated on by their partner understands the pain OP in the first story felt. There is nothing worse than being betrayed by those you love and trust.
I can't even begin to imagine..
Betrayal from both an old friend and a spouse. I couldn't have been as strong as OP in that situation. I hope she doing well.
@@transsnack Same.
Story 3: it sounds like she might have kleptomania. I'm surprised nobody has mentioned this before. It's a serious condition people suffer from and should absolutely be brought up to a professional.
This, my brothers classmate is also a klepto too unfortunately his parents didn't care and let it get more worse than before.
Last story looks like a clear case of Kleptomania. There are definitely ways to combat kleptomania, so she's not guaranteed to keep doing things like this if she does really want to get better
god damn, the ex-husband of op 1 quickly went from being an adulterer to outright psychopath. looks like she got to see his true colors in the end
He was clearly lying to the "friend' too. Mind you, I don't care that she was lied to but it shows what a snake this guy really is.
OP didn't make the slide show, JESS'S MOM DID!! OP met with Jess and Tyler's parents and gave them all the info and screenshots, and they had the meeting without OP.
From the latest update, Jess was blasted by an aggravated wife for having an affair with yet another married man. She should basically become a street-walker because that's her best career path and at least she will be getting paid for it.
Rslash: *super somber reading of a woman’s entire life going up in flames* 😢☹️🙍♂️
Also Rslash: DIABLO 4!? ME TOO 🎉😊🫨😍🥳
Story 3: Kleptomania is a very serious problem, and I believe she is a kleptomaniac. Heck, OP and his wife have the money to buy that stuff, but she steals it anyway. I hope OP doesn't suffer badly for it, he doesn't deserve the financial trouble that the wife is bringing
Yeah, but i'm a bit concerned that if he didn't tell the police that they did have money to buy stuff, and let his wife lie about not having money, he might get in trouble for covering for her. I don't know if that's how law works, though
This is exactly what I'm thinking. She doesn't even know why she did it? Definitely a kleptomania problem. Girlie needs therapy.
Op is hank from breaking bad
@@wouldntyouliketoknowwesath7789 Not offering information isn't a crime. There are two ways OP could get in trouble here.
1) Tell an outright lie, actively say something to try to swing the case. Even then, unless it's in court or he makes a public display about it there probably wouldn't be consequences beyond a judge being mean to him for a minute.
2) Refuse to testify if subpoenaed, if the court demands you to speak, you have to. That said, you can't force one to testify against their spouse in court so he's safe there.
What he did, keeping your mouth shut around cops unless you absolutely have to, is totally legal and almost always to best option
@@andrewbondarenko5849 Agreed. Any lawyer--including mine--will simply tell you that when a cop asks questions, the only acceptable answer is to say nothing as what you say can and WILL be used against you in the courtroom. However, always be completely honest with your lawyer and follow all ethical instructions given to you in regards to what to say in the courtroom.
Story 1: Going through that hurt me a little bit. Partially because I'm helping my wife through dealing with her father's ill health. I couldn't imagine trying to do anything with anyone else especially since I'm both hands on with my son AND helping my father-in-law whenever I can. At times it feeling like I'm the closest thing the man has to a friend in this world thats not his wife. Its not cancer for him but its almost as bad, soon after my son was born he had a near fatal heart attack and a stroke at the same time. This occurred because he went 3 years prior untreated for his diabetes because his paperwork fell through the cracks at the VA.
He is honorably discharged from the Army due to service connected disability. For those who don't know what that means it means that he became disabled due to an event that happened while serving in the Army. Namely from being flipped in a M1 Abrams tank. Thats right, not only has my father in law survived being flipped in a tank but has also survived a form of heart failure that would have KILLED most other people. And he was just chatting up the paramedics on the way to the hospital while undergoing essentially cascade heart failure. To say the Grim Reaper FEARS my father in law is an understatement. Anyway, point is I couldn't begin to imagine betraying my wife of now 14 years but betraying a man I so wholeheartedly respect and dare I say love as a father figure. Especially since I basically fought tooth and nail to make sure that he could get to know his grandson because both he and my son deserve no less. I fear the day that man goes, not just because I know how hard its going to hit my wife, my son, and my mother in law - but how hard it will hit me too. The OP of this post has my utmost sympathies.
I read the first story on Reddit the other day and lord. It just gets worse. And worse. I couldn’t stop reading it because I was just baffled at the pure betrayal and the fact that the soon to be ex husband wanted to blame his mistress for blowing up his “perfect marriage” as if pointing the finger at her doesn’t mean he’s pointing three back at himself at the same time.
I love the reverse pickpocket. The child was loved and brought up well.
The woman in the first
story is the embodiment of strength. Going through so much tragedy and loss in almost a single moment but remains strong for her kids and herself. She even remains positive saying she will get through this and never dignifies school yard taunt with a response. Such a strong woman and i applaud her and pray for her
Dude: im scared im addicted to making my family happy
Us: theres worse things to be addicted to
Just when you think ‘I’ve heard some weird stuff’ you hear a story about someone stealing chairs from inside their neighbors house and displaying them on their porch.
Now I’m going to look at chairs on people’s porches and wonder where they got them from.
Story 1: I've actually seen this one before but glad you covered it. However OP wasn't the one who did the slide show. OP met up with the ex-husband and ex bestfriends mom the day before with all the proof. The next day the mothers were the ones who showed the slides how. OP was packing and going to the cabin at the time
Ha, I just posted this too. And the guy with the crush on OP was the best friend's brother, not the BIL.
Do you have the Reddit link or title ?
@@andreajackson4138 I'm pretty sure it's called "my husband is cheating on me with my best friend"
Here's why I don't understand cheaters.. Their excuse is that it was a mistake and love you so very much, we can work past this.. How is sleeping with someone else or more over and over but you love your SO? Those two do not mix, it's oil and water... If you truly love the person you're with, you would never even THINK about hurting them INTENTIONALLY.... This is why I would never stay with a cheater...
The stealing issue is a psychological one
My sister has a shopping issue as well where she can’t hold herself back when she thinks she is getting a discount or a deal
It’s a reflex reaction like her brain is turned off
Kleptomania? Or another
@@eksboks148 she hasnt been diagnosed yet, but when you shop with her, you can definitely see it happening. show her the discount card for a item and she's on autopilot and goes straight for it. we end up wasting so much food because of that
@@bcatbb2896 hope she gets help if viable :(
There was a silver lining to the first story. Neither the husbands nor the friends parents turned on OP blaming her for overreacting or some other nonsense as so often happens in these stories.
I suspect in the second story the parents have a pretty good idea where the found money is coming from.
Story 1 was not only sad, but it also went mental and horrifiying..
Jess is a really bad person and friend for thinking that Tyler was "the love of her life" without remorse and making OP feel like crap since the beginning. Tyler is such a POS for cheating on her with HER BEST FRIEND, being violent mental when he was caught, treatning OP and the list goes on... The "nice guy" phase of him is mostly from guilt, it was really obvious now.. Now OP sees what under the masks of the people she adored years ago, and it's so painful to watch..
Jess' dad is amazing for disowning her because of all of this!
Tyler's brother need to be careful, REALLY careful.. He need to let time to OP for fixing her custody issues and the divorce before seeing if they can be together or not..
And.. OP's dad is so precious... bless his soul..❤
Yeah, honestly hearing that Jess referred to Tyler as her 'brother' but slept with him anyway made me feel gross, I almost wonder if it was a kind of jealousy of OP? Like if Jess' marriage fell apart then OP shouldn't be allowed to have a happy one either?
@@booknerd4303 I was thinking the same thing.. Cheating on your best friend's husband, that you consider as your brother, is really messed up and nasty 🤢.. also.. Yes the marriage between Jess and her husband was failling, but why tf she needed to fail OP's marriage ?
Maybe Jess is a serial cheater, idk.. but still.. it's a real selfish move...
Tyler is the major jerk for betraying OP and her already broken soul...
S1: There's more to the story. I think the ex husbajd threatened Op and the kids so the lawyer is going for full custody now. Jess apparently showed up in the comments to write 'her side' of things and got dragged in the comments. Cheater applogists were annoying as always because they were trying to guilt Op for "tearing apart her family" and "keeping the father away from his kids". I'm pretty sure there's more but that's the gist of what I can remember.
My heart is breaking for the OP of story 1. My dad also had stage 3 colon cancer; he was diagnosed within months of my 13th birthday, and passed away when I was 18 and about to start college. What OP’s ex husband and ex bff did is unforgivable (it’s bad enough that they cheated, but they did it while she’s dealing with the notion of losing her dad from cancer), and she deserves so much better than them!
Story 2 is so wholesome; thank you OP for being so sweet (and I love how your parents react to the money you secretly gift them).
Story 1: Never never never get together with the brother/sister of a toxic ex, even if they say they've cut all contact. I've seen too many cases where this just causes even more drama down the line.
I love the wholesome family, real harsh stories are important because they teach us what to run away from by example, but it's refreshing to hear something cute between the same 3 stories about entitled people
1st story: I can't begin to imagine. That's sick to do the a pregnant woman who's losing everyone, I almost wonder if he wanted you to find out that way. Guess they should go into acting if they're so good at hiding shit like that, without a second thought. Actors are often antisocial too as far as i hear but even most actors probably wouldn't be that human trash.
2nd story: what a wholesome family story, good to balance out the heaviness of the last one. I might even start doing it lolol
3rd story: yeah..what a believable story :|
I hope if she has kleptomania (which seems likely at a glance if they aren't doing horribly financially) she gets help, and I'm really glad OP decided to treat it with brains and not emotions. Also haha "kick in the financial nuts"
Oh Slash, I appreciate you so much right now. Your happiness with the kid putting money in his parents pockets made me feel better….which I really needed. 🙂
That reverse pickpocket story might actually be the single most wholesome story I’ve ever heard online
There was a klepto in our family. He’d take all kinds of random stuff from the neighbors. We were embarrassed, but we couldn’t be too mad at him. The klepto was a Black Lab. Luckily he grew out of it.
I knew a woman with, I suspect, kleptomania. Every time she visited she would steal something, and it was always small random things. She stole a kids jumper, a phone charger, and even a cushion from my mum. It was super weird behaviour. I told her she was no longer welcome at my house after she stole my phone charger!
That second story was probably the cutest thing I've ever heard!
I'm sorry, but the pride in Rslash's voice when he said he was playing a fire sorceress was just so wholesome. It reminds me why I subscribed. Come for the stories. Stay for the wholesome guy behind the microphone.
S2: You’re such an awesome person and your parents raised you to be a good person.
This sweet and wholesome story made my day. Bless you.
It never stops to bewilder me how much muck can come out the washing when people get caught out like with first OP. She is one sturdy woman to go through all of that on top of her father's passing and held it together for her kids.
the second story is the fresh of breath air i needed. it’s so cute. OP and their family are angels.
12:00 Fun fact; in my hometown, I had actually left a store and returned to pay. I was only able to do this because it’s a small town. I knew the cashier and owners, so they told me to run home for my wallet and come back. If I never returned, each and every person would tell my parents.
When I went to university in 1990, my mother put $1-$5 dollar bills in pockets of some of my clothes. When I put on my winter coat and found a $20, I thought something was up. I asked her and she admitted to doing it…as her mom had done the same thing to her when she started university in 1955. When my son started university in 2012, I did the same thing!
For the last story, it honestly sounds like they've got kleptomania. It's a very real disorder and it can destroy lives. The wife needs serious therapy asap.
Last Story; Shoplifting wife.
I doubt these were the only incidents. They caught her at one store multiple times, but there are other stores in the town, I'm sure.
People actually get "addicted" to shoplifting, much the same way as a gambling addiction. Some people's brains are just wired that way, to get a huge rush from any type of windfall. Many stores see as much as a 15% reduction in theft losses after getting rid of lotto scratcher sales, as there's a huge overlap in those demographics.
This also tends to impact women more than men for some reason, especially (but not exclusively) women up to 3 years after giving birth, not related to post-partum depression, but the same kind of trigger in altered behavior. Women from ages 12 to 40 tend to make up the majority of package thefts as well. It's not usually premeditated, but rather they see an opportunity and can't resist taking it. This does happen with men too, but is less commonly a compulsion, and more often a planned, deliberate act. So men often steal more items, or more expensive items, but women account for the greatest number of overall incidents statistically. And that is a trend of course, NOT a rule. There are tons of outliers, but there is a statistically significant difference in how theft is orchestrated based on gender demographics, spanning multiple cultures and ethnicities.
A couple of studies have shown that women also tend to show more regret or feel guiltier for stealing, but are also better at rationalizing their actions.
The only reason I point out the gender disparity is that the OP is her husband, and likely has a somewhat different view of the subject. I see a scenario where she walked into the store, intending to pay the whole time, then realized she could just walk out the door, and made the decision in the last few seconds and enjoyed the rush she felt in getting away with it. That's more common than a premeditated trip to a store she knew she could steal from.
The problem with compulsive acts is they are a lot harder to stop. There's no real time between the thought and the action to consider things like consequences, so deterrence is of limited utility in prevention. And because a compulsive doesn't necessarily know why they did it, they come up with rationalizations after the fact to explain their behavior to themselves. So taking accountability before getting caught is less common. There's a whole branch of criminology dedicated to why people steal, and it rarely has to do with need. We tend to assume the poor steal more out of necessity, but that's not always the case. Poverty is more often just one of the rationalizations after the fact that people use, but if that's not applicable, they'll use another reason to justify it.
First thing I would do is take her off of shared accounts. Separate finances from here on. Even if he doesn't intend to leave his wife, a divorce can limit liability. They could get divorced and continue to live together like nothing ever happened. He'd lose spousal privilege, but put the house and cars in his name and have a formal rental agreement so if she gets busted again, it's harder to go after those assets, and she'll show lesser income, so any court-mandated restitution will be on a more tolerable payment plan. This does mean she'll need her own health insurance, so it's not necessarily any cheaper, but can save some headaches if it happens again. See a lawyer about that and consider all options.
Maybe also use an app like Life360, FamilyWall, etc.. that way the husband can get notifications when she arrives at a retailer. I'm sure she'd banned from that store, and if she returns, he should know immediately because the trespassing charge will just make things worse. It gives him the opportunity to intervene. He can do the grocery shopping from now on.
In my small town, we have a community Discord server where retailers share info about known shoplifters. Getting kicked out of one place can get you kicked out of every place in town. That's less common in larger cities, just due to the logistic difficulties, but as facial recognition gets better, more ubiquitous, and the expansion of license plate readers in parking lots... I can see that spreading to more places in the near future. But don't be shocked if she's recognized elsewhere and promptly told to leave. Private businesses can deny service on those grounds. Because some places do use license plate readers to flag known shoplifters, the husband should not drive her car (or he can get new plates).
If I were the husband, I would also make sure there's not an underlying drug or alcohol problem. She may be doing this to cover money that goes missing from the joint account. I'd dump all the alcohol in the house and demand an extensive drug test. Addicts can go to great lengths to hide their addiction from their family. This is often the first "symptom" people notice.
I can understand him not wanting to leave his wife in these circumstances, she needs help. But I would be an epic ass-hole about this, even as I tried to not to be. Just the little bit of assholishness that slips through would be a lot. Try to keep it in check, but that can obviously be very difficult.
The shoplifting stories break my heart. I have kleptomania, recovering on 2 years now. Compulsive stealing is often undiagnosed kleptomania, and it's a very serious illness that should get you help and empathy. It's a fairly serious addiction, one your own brain creates, meaning that you can do everything right and still have to suffer from it.
I use reusable bags that I also use to put what I am going to buy in as I shop. During the worst of Covid I checked myself out and got all the way out of the store after encountering multiple employees that said goodbye to me.I hit the door and realized I didn’t have a receipt since I forgot that key step of paying. I ran back to the register(with the employees looking at me like I was bonkers)that thankfully still had my total up and paid. My point is I know they have tons of cameras that log everything so even with the humans not noticing the cameras would and log my car as well so I don’t understand how anyone thinks they will get away with it in this age of surveillance.
"DIABLO 4??? ME TOO!!!" That was so cute! 🤣🤣
1st story: I went to reddit to read the story and all the comments from OP and the updates. It's so awesome that her soon to be ex ILs and her BFF's parents (who she says are like surrogate parents to her) and Jess's older brother Jake all have her back and are supporting her. Her husband sounds insane and I hope he doesn't do anything crazy and gets help. And I'm hoping one day we'll find out OP and Jake have gotten together after she's had time to heal.
Story 2: That is such a sweet story!
Story 3: Being a klepto has nothing to do with finances, at least not in the end. It's all about the score for them, it's a disorder that needs to be treated.
The klepto wife was lucky she was stopped at this point. Some stores let it continue until you have stolen more than $3-5K, which is the threshold for a felony depending on state. Then they drop the hammer and the thief is looking at serious time.
Story 1, OP is a freaking indestructible, everything around her is crumbling and she is calm and collective.
Story 2 is so sweet.
Story 3 is called kleptomaniac
I remember listening to the first story on Mark narrations and I'm not going to lie this is one of the most unhinge cheating stories I've ever heard in my whole entire life and it just made me feel so terrible for the original poster listening to the first half but the very moment she got her revenge with the slide show thing that was just pure genius things to her other friend and you know I'm glad that the ex-husband and ex-best friend got exactly what they deserved any truly show that the husband never cared for the friend and it always fascinates me like you know dude why would you cheat when you say you don't love this person or you don't care for them in your just using them for sex if you wanted to have sex you could have just made the time to ask your wife the original poster to basically see if you guys can find some time to go out have a nice dinner do something romantic and then you know go crazy with each other but instead this dude chooses to cheat like a moron and like the coward little pussy is I'm sorry to say that but that's exactly what he is but the good part is at least the original poster is doing better and she got to play Diablo 4 and you know finally chill with her kids properly without you know all this mess being involved I'm not too sure of her in the brother-in-law will ever get together but he sounds like a way better man for the kids and for the original poster even though I do feel like she probably does need a break from having a relationship with a person and maybe giving her some time to herself but rather than that I wish nothing but the best going for for the original poster and her kids I feel terrible about her father and what he's going through but at least he was there to support her in her time of need throughout this terrible situation
Cheating isn't about the sex itself. It's an emotional thing. Probably from insecurity. Or escape. Or something like that. A narcissist might even cheat because they aren't getting the attention they want from their partner. Yes, the cheater is completely in the wrong. But it's far deeper than just sex.
@@pollypockets508Not on this story, the OP was kind of a superwoman, see everything she was doing despite of everything that was happen in her life.
I want to hear percent agree with you guys on everything and on top of that I also respect the original poster for the way she handled her situation man I think anybody else in her shoes would have just felt broken and just completely destroyed emotionally
Story 1: anyone who gets violent and throws things and hits walls is a hair's breadth from doing that to a person. It's tragic, but OP and the kids will be a lot safer without him in their life.
Kleptomania for sure. For those who don’t know, kleptomania is a disorder that gives a person a bad addiction to stealing. It usually starts off small, stealing small trinkets, but can often turn into straight up stealing things. It’s rarely ever for need, most of the people who do it do it for the same reason most murderers do, the thrill. It’s the adrenaline, the knowing of wrong that gets you drugged up. It’s basically like being a druggie to adrenaline. Get her into therapy as soon as you can.
Story 1: OP didn't arrange nor attend the confrontation the 2 sets of parents had with the troublemakers. That was all the parents' doing. They told OP that it was going to happen and told her what happened afterwards but she wasn't there.
I forgot to pay for my groceries at self check out once, went back to pay for em around 30 minutes later and no, there was no police lol
Last story: The thing that makes Kleptomania and other compulsions so dangerous is that giving in to the compulsion RELIEVES stress. OCD is probably the easiest compulsive disorder to understand. The person has an intrusive thought (did I remember to lock the door?), it doesn't go away, so thinking about it over and over causes distraction and increases stress. The person starts locking-unlocking-relocking the door. This relieves t6he stress and makes it easier to ignore the intrusive thought. At least until the obsession changes or gets worse.
Everyone feels these urges, but for people with compulsive disorders the intrusive thoughts are harder to manage and the compulsions provide less relief over time, so if the underlying cause isn't dealt with the compulsions get worse and worse. It's sort of like a feedback loop, but instead of noise it's the personality that spins out of control as stress gets worse and worse with no relief.
Of course, we don't know that the wife actually has kleptomania or another compulsive disorder. These are complex psychological diagnoses. All we see here is a symptom, there are dozens of different things that could be the cause.
Why would OP get his wife an attorney? If she already admitted guilt just let her get a public defender, and if she really wants a better lawyer SHE should pay for it.
How in the world do you steal cereal? At least she's not going around knifing all the boxes and being a cereal killer! I'm totally cereal! :D
The stealing thing sounds like a mental thing where they can’t help but do it. That or they probably learned it off someone who also had a bad habit of stealing.
The reverse pickpocketing story is heartwarming asf
15:00 psychology research shows 90% of theft is done out of addiction, not need. Theres a rush associated with danger. They don't actually care about the stuff they steal, which sucks since they might just as easily trash it whether its expensive or sentimental to you, as they could sell it. But who needs money when you have the 5 finger discount.
For me, I couldn't tell you why I did it either. It was a rush. I was going through a period of (maybe 10) years in a manic phases of risky behavior (textbook overspending, unsafe "encounters", five finger discounts, etc.). It was a compulsion and I couldn't stop myself. I'm glad she is going to see a therapist. Most people will never understand the illness behind it (not all cases) including the offender. It's like scratching an itch or swatting a flay out of your face without even thinking about it.
Lawyer fees? Leave her with a public defender. They can still negotiate those things, and then he doesn't have to help her pay fees if he's so mad.
Public defenders are so overworked and under-supplied in this country you'd almost be better off representing yourself.
Sure, his rightfully mad at her for doing something so pointless and reckless, but I don't think he wants her sent to jail.
@@TheBluestflamingos you can have one and not end up in jail. I had one (because I'm broke), and got an offer to lower a felony to a misdemeanor and do pretrial diversion.
I think me defending myself also would've gone FAR worse.
You don't just leave someone you love 😔
Story 2 is so sweet….I get excited too when I find a couple bucks in the pant pockets of the laundry!
Normalize shooting your "friend" and husband, staging a murder suicide scene and mastering funeral acting.
I like dabneys excitement of diablo lolol
My brothers classmate is a klepto he steals everything inside the classroom even bags, unfortunately this dude got expelled for shoplifting and his parents NGAF on his mental health that made his condition worse than before.
I had a "best friend" like that as well. I was ALWAYS there for her. But she decided my ex was worth more than I ever did to her.
You got some details in the beginning of OP's update wrong. At first OP confides in her mother-in-law and Jess's mom about what happened, and they're outraged and essentially told her that they're disgusted with their children's actions and are disowning them. OP asked if they can have a sit-down with Jess and Tyler and confront them while she does her best to move as much of her and her children's belongings out of their house and find somewhere to disappear for a while. Angie (Jess's mom) was the one who made the slideshow, not OP
I heard story 1 somewhere else, but not the update. What kind of jerk goes to a man's house, who is dying of cancer, and proceeds to break in his door with a bat. An insane one, that's who. Lucky you got a way from him.
Story 2 This is family, man.
Story 3: Got a close relative who is a klepto
The shoplifting story made made me think of the Family Guy episode where Lois goes to jail for the same thing.
The husband Tyler is only going ballistic now because he realizes he's not going to get any of that sweet sweet inheritance money that his wife will soon collect
I feel the reverse pickpocket. It feels nice being able to repay your parent(s) for raising you. Shame that they're too stubborn to just take the money so you have to get creative.
2nd story not to mention the total wholesomeness of this which everyone obviously already has but this immediately made me think of fo4 and sneaking bombs into people's pockets ☠️
OP honestly dodged a HUGE bullet if that shit-filled, man-shape child reacted that violently when the truth came out about their affair. God only knows how violent he could have gotten if OP and/or the kids were home when he got there.
Bored housewife, compulsively steals a lot?
Looks like we have a Lois.
I heard the first story from Smosh’s Reddit video last week. I’m so glad you included the update too.
Last story: I might be alone on this but I think he should chew her out. He's clearly mad and if he doesn't Express how he's upset with her then there's nothing stopping her from doing it again. And if it doesn't up costing her career. Just more time the steel, Plus OP does have a right to be angry with her. Everything that was listed is a completely fair thing to be mad about, and given how much has been stolen I highly doubt she's getting away with just community service, especially if they look deeper into her past. This might not be cool but I say bargain with her, tell her if you're going to pay for her lawyer she needs to seek professional help because this might be that mental disorder I heard about where people shoplift just for the sake of it. Although I might be wrong.
the serial shoplifter wife should check if her brother in law is a *chemistry teacher with an RV*
There was one summer that I reverse picked pocketed my mom too. She was going through a hard summer and realized she hadnt budgeted her money well. We still had all the things we needed but i would stick ones, fives, and maybe a ten once in a while in her purse. One time i heard her say "wow! I'm rich!" And then the next day she beought home a bunch of chips and snacks. I totally get why OP might be addicted to it. It makes me feel better but I i stopped after thinga got better.
The reverse pickpocketing is adorable and so heartwarming. Sounds like OP's love language is gift giving.
And I thought losing 3 family members and one best friend in the same year was bad. But op got worse then me for the first story
I heard story 1 as it was coming out. For clarification, OP showed hisband and friends parents the print outs minus the nudes and tapes, the packed belongings and the kids and left. Their own parents made the slide show and forced husband and friend to watch during a confrontation later without OP before husband and friend retaliated
And this entire story was in the span of 24 hours
The friends family are amazing, The husbands family are actual godsent. Most of the time, families want to defend their kin because they don't want to accept that their own flesh and blood would do something that bad. But these families made no excuses, they stood firmly by OP and the husbands brother even provided the support she needed in this time. Makes you think how these families managed to produce such ass hat kids? Even if they did say they didn't raise them to be this way, it's still so weird.
When he said “after the kids went to bed he hooked up” I thought only was going in a different direction 😂
I reverse-pickpocketed my parents (mostly my mom) my teenage years after I won $500 in a scratch off ticket I was gifted by a friend. Hid the $ in her favorite yet almost never worn clothes as a reward for treating herself.
RIP mom
Second Story person is very awesome for taking care of their parents during the golden years. It also shows that they have a very close family unit.
The story about op's wife stealing from the supermarket is that the husband needs to divorce his wife and let her face her own actions and not get tangled up in her mess
I’m sure it’s not that easy. I was thinking the same thing until I realized maybe he wants to support her in her problem and make sure she gets help. However if he does all that and she can’t (won’t) stop then absolutely leave her to it and get out of there.
They are together for better OR worse😢
Last story: Glad to hear that the father got full custody as well as getting to stay in his house after the divorce. The family courts are so messed up that sometimes the mother STILL gets custody despite evidence they’re an unfit parent along with the house and car while the father gets bled dry with child support, alimony and only has ‘visitations’.
Wow, that first story was beyond belief. I'm really going to need an update on that one. Here's hoping it's got a happy or at least a reasonable ending.
Third-story, don't pay her lawyer fees. Let her shoplifting ass just rot in jail
The thing about committing a crime is that all it takes is for the cops to catch you once. Then your on record and more often than not they put you in jail for years. It's not worth the time unless your desperate.
For the first story, I'm glad to hear parents not make excuses for their cheating kids. This the first story I've heard in a while where the parents don't support the cheater! I hope op well be fine.
Absolutely right on the last one being the tip of the iceberg. I was a bibliokleptomaniac when I was younger, although I guess I still am but I control myself by only buying online and not going to libraries, so I can kind of understand. It has nothing to do with monetary value, but just the thrill of doing something you know is wrong and the control of taking something without permission. If stealing free books from a library isn’t a perfect example of it not being able to value of the items, I don’t know what is.
Some kleptos just keep treasure chests of their trophies and never do anything but look at them. Some steal and then ditch the evidence after. It’s a weird addiction