The Chess Board Is Broken

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  • čas přidán 25. 08. 2024
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    Music used in this video:
    Xomu - Last Dance
    • Xomu - Last Dance
    #chess #ChessVariants

Komentáře • 109

  • @mattan44
    @mattan44 Před 7 měsíci +488

    I love how every checkmate here is forced to be a smothered checkmate

    • @dom8429
      @dom8429 Před 7 měsíci +2

      the word "smothered" is just weird to me. I don't know, it sounds icky

  • @unknowed5048
    @unknowed5048 Před 7 měsíci +391

    When will simp do a 4 player chess? It would be fun to see 3 paid actors in one video

    • @LURTZcz
      @LURTZcz Před 7 měsíci +28

      "I am better than my viewers: 1v3"

    • @kitthekat6844
      @kitthekat6844 Před 7 měsíci +15

      Don't think that's happening any time soon. He'd need to pay three actors... In this economy? No way

    • @FoxSlyme
      @FoxSlyme Před 7 měsíci +9

      Just get unpaid actors bruh

    • @unknowed5048
      @unknowed5048 Před 7 měsíci +2

      @@FoxSlyme good idea, 3 unpaid actors

    • @kitthekat6844
      @kitthekat6844 Před 7 měsíci +1

      @@FoxSlyme but these actors also need to pay their rent 😱

  • @ENCHANTMEN_
    @ENCHANTMEN_ Před 7 měsíci +167

    It's very simple, knights teleport to a square exactly √5 spaces away

    • @simic0racle157
      @simic0racle157 Před 7 měsíci +1

      came down here to say this, well done you put it much simpler than me...

    • @genegray9895
      @genegray9895 Před 7 měsíci +11

      This is always how I've understood it. The horse "jumps" by moving into the third dimension above the board and then returning to its original chessly plane at its destination.

    • @RoundShades
      @RoundShades Před 7 měsíci +2

      @@genegray9895, wonder if that's all teleporting is, jumping out of the planear 3d space out into 4d space and then landing back onto it.

    • @a_wild_Kirillian
      @a_wild_Kirillian Před 6 měsíci +1

      ​@@RoundShades, I'm no physicist, but yes, you still have to transfer your atoms and using other dimensions allows you to fold space.
      Unless you destroy your body and just create a clone at the destination point.

  • @Arm0riel
    @Arm0riel Před 7 měsíci +225

    Knights move like worms from Dune -- they go under the board and pop up in the right place consuming any enemy figure that was standing on that place

    • @mauer1
      @mauer1 Před 7 měsíci +21

      that would assume the board beeing 3d.
      i like the thought that they are teleporting to the targetsquare and in good old tf2 fashion just straight up telefragging what they land on.

    • @grafd7467
      @grafd7467 Před 7 měsíci +5

      @@mauer1 old good tf2 (old good q3 arena(old good q2))

    • @Gastel
      @Gastel Před 7 měsíci +1

      Shai Equus

    • @maxastro
      @maxastro Před měsícem

      ​@@grafd7467(old good Q1)

  • @mr.d8747
    @mr.d8747 Před 7 měsíci +145

    *Rare footage of Simp winning two games of a variant but not saying 200% winrate.*

    • @shapular
      @shapular Před 7 měsíci +18

      He didn't say he won the second one.

    • @EdKolis
      @EdKolis Před 7 měsíci +7

      He said it went better than this one, which he won

    • @StarlitWitchy
      @StarlitWitchy Před 7 měsíci

      ​@@EdKolisbetter content

  • @shoelessbandit1581
    @shoelessbandit1581 Před 7 měsíci +51

    Knights move by simply moving the entire universe around them while staying in place. To the pieces the knight looks like it is floating but the knights know what's going in

  • @VivaLaFlaem
    @VivaLaFlaem Před 7 měsíci +38

    No joke I Actually know why the knight moves how it moves and I found it out myself whilst looking at the tiles in my bathroom. Take a five by five chessboard. Put a rook in the middle. Take away all the squares it can reach. Same with the bishop. The Squares remaining are the knight squares. youre welcome, that also explains why it jumps

    • @victor_creator
      @victor_creator Před 7 měsíci +26

      More simply, the knight moves to all the spaces a queen can’t when placed in the center of a 5x5 board

    • @recino2
      @recino2 Před 7 měsíci +3

      Using bathroom tiles for chess? What is this, the 7th Guest?

    • @VivaLaFlaem
      @VivaLaFlaem Před 7 měsíci +3

      @@victor_creator yes, even tho i like the long explaination better because the knights abilities must be somewhat balanced to the other pieces (bishop and rook)

  • @atoucangirl
    @atoucangirl Před 7 měsíci +34

    the way knights move is that they charge 2 squares, then the horse takes a sudden turn because it was hungry and saw tasty grass to the side.

  • @thedeck-buildingdemon8293
    @thedeck-buildingdemon8293 Před 7 měsíci +9

    2:22 your PIPI will regret this

  • @joshuahudson2170
    @joshuahudson2170 Před 7 měsíci +4

    We don't know. The movement of the knight has been handed down from the beginning unchanged (as the rook).

    • @EdKolis
      @EdKolis Před 7 měsíci +1

      Poor shogi knights though. They can only move to the two forward most squares that a chess knight can move to. Chaaaaaarge!

  • @event-keystrim213
    @event-keystrim213 Před 7 měsíci +2

    2 spaces up/down/left/right, then rotate 90 degrees in any direction and move one more space

    • @EdKolis
      @EdKolis Před 7 měsíci

      Instructions unclear, levitating over the chess board

    • @event-keystrim213
      @event-keystrim213 Před 7 měsíci +2

      @@EdKolis I haven't seen any rule book saying that knights can't jump over the board as long as they land on a valid space

    • @EdKolis
      @EdKolis Před 7 měsíci

      @@event-keystrim213 what if they dig down into the board?

    • @event-keystrim213
      @event-keystrim213 Před 7 měsíci +2

      @@EdKolis all is fine as long as the previous instructions are followed, AND they land on a valid space

  • @JJ_R
    @JJ_R Před 7 měsíci +15

    This almost reminds me to the suggestion I keep putting up on the Discord, except it’s pretty much impossible to capture every enemy knight without losing one of your own.

  • @luowastaken_
    @luowastaken_ Před 7 měsíci +10

    simp is too powerful

  • @farouqbaiti4315
    @farouqbaiti4315 Před 7 měsíci +2

    I can't wait to see the next game that you played.

  • @puregero
    @puregero Před 7 měsíci +1

    I'm excited to see the next game!

  • @firockfinion3326
    @firockfinion3326 Před 7 měsíci +1

    Some day someone needs to give Simp a challenge to perform an en pessant in a variant game.

  • @TasTheWatcher
    @TasTheWatcher Před 7 měsíci +1

    -Knights- horsies are fast enough to charge through/past pieces safely, but not stop to fight

  • @wombat4191
    @wombat4191 Před 7 měsíci +12

    Knights fly 3 squares at once in a zigzag motion, because they have horse.

  • @divinesleeper
    @divinesleeper Před 7 měsíci +6

    this is a cool variant actually, if you don't hate knights like me

  • @nowar1620
    @nowar1620 Před 7 měsíci +1

    Nah. Everybody knows that knight moves like the letter Г.

    • @EdKolis
      @EdKolis Před 7 měsíci

      So knights are Waluigi?

  • @abitofsupport601
    @abitofsupport601 Před 7 měsíci

    Horses always require one of two things: Tasty grass, or the blood of the rider's enemies. One of them needs a reason to go to a square and so they charge in a direction looking for it. It always happens to be exactly two tiles in a given direction and then they look around left and right to find it.

  • @ChrisMaster2
    @ChrisMaster2 Před 7 měsíci

    He already explained the beginning question

  • @vipe_toutonche
    @vipe_toutonche Před 7 měsíci

    Knights move 3 spaces in any path you choose as long as you land on a different color than where you started

  • @Lockirby2
    @Lockirby2 Před 6 měsíci

    Knights are just Dragoons from Final Fantasy.

  • @red0-0
    @red0-0 Před 7 měsíci

    suggestion: Make a chess bossfight variant

  • @harp9540
    @harp9540 Před 7 měsíci +1

    Poor guy he got roasted X100000 today

  • @EDoyl
    @EDoyl Před 7 měsíci

    The knight moves like a horse

  • @BloodWolf227
    @BloodWolf227 Před 3 měsíci

    You sounded like GLaDOS at the beginning of the video.

  • @Aurora91284
    @Aurora91284 Před 7 měsíci +2

    We need a disclaimer next video

  • @VirtualMarmalade
    @VirtualMarmalade Před 7 měsíci

    The Knight Move is very simple. They can move to any square in the 24 squares around them except for any squares diagonal to them or on the same rank/file as them. Couldn't be simpler.

  • @theominouspigeon
    @theominouspigeon Před 7 měsíci +1

    when are we getting a 4 player chess video

  • @realmehuhn9437
    @realmehuhn9437 Před 7 měsíci +48

    Now, this Is a real "furry con" chalenge. Let's go you filthy animals ❤

    • @EHMM
      @EHMM Před 7 měsíci +2

      tf?

    • @QuokkaWaka
      @QuokkaWaka Před 7 měsíci

      What did you just say to me? 😨

    • @EdKolis
      @EdKolis Před 7 měsíci +2

      I'll have you know I graduated at the top of my class at knight school and I have over 300 confirmed kills during my service in the Crusades...

    • @realmehuhn9437
      @realmehuhn9437 Před 7 měsíci +3

      Clarification:
      I did not want to be disdainful, nor to insult anyone. Being a furry myself, I apologize if someone got offended by my coment, I wrote that regarding Simp's jan 12th 2024 video "This Is Why You Don't Auto Promote To Queen", taking the challenge "chess, but it's a furry convention...". Also, I just found Simp's phrase funny to repeat.

    • @QuokkaWaka
      @QuokkaWaka Před 7 měsíci +2

      @@realmehuhn9437
      I will literally never forgive you for this

  • @onebear6504
    @onebear6504 Před 7 měsíci +1

    2:16 _-Coward!-_ or so I would have said, but I understand the sentiment with that pawn. However,
    4:12 *thumbs down* _Booooo!_

  • @redeye4516
    @redeye4516 Před 7 měsíci

    I always figured the knight, perhaps obviously, represents a horse and its rider. The horse can either leap over obstacles or can simply brute force through thin enough enemy lines by crashing through them (no one is gonna stand his ground against a speeding horse, so the enemies will move aside rather than be trampled), while the knight riding the horse attacks with a sideways movement to slash with his sword.

  • @lonelyPorterCH
    @lonelyPorterCH Před 7 měsíci +3

    The king is kinda useless in this mode^^

    • @CubePVZ
      @CubePVZ Před 7 měsíci +4

      not kinda, he is entirely useless

  • @Melio160
    @Melio160 Před 7 měsíci

    no disclaimer sad :(

  • @kemosonicfan123lbp
    @kemosonicfan123lbp Před 7 měsíci +2

    +122 elo lmao

  • @firstlast8085
    @firstlast8085 Před 7 měsíci

    Is there any variant that Simp isn't perfect at?

  • @georgeofhamilton
    @georgeofhamilton Před 7 měsíci +5

    What’s the music that starts at 0:11?

    • @grzegorzmj4881
      @grzegorzmj4881 Před 7 měsíci +2

      I'd also like to know, there is something chilling about this tune.

    • @cindrmon
      @cindrmon Před 7 měsíci +3

      Polumnia Omnia - HoYoMix
      yes, he used Genshin OST for every introduction to a new chess variant

    • @georgeofhamilton
      @georgeofhamilton Před 7 měsíci +1

      @@cindrmon Thank you!

  • @wotenjoyer2777
    @wotenjoyer2777 Před 7 měsíci +3

    LET'S GO BRICKKKKKKK

  • @AyakaruJuuhachi
    @AyakaruJuuhachi Před 6 měsíci

    you credited the song used in the latter of the video
    but what was the choirilic music in the beginning?

  • @RaceBandit
    @RaceBandit Před 7 měsíci

    Replacing all elites with Knights doesn't sound like normal Chess ... interesting variant though. Is this the first time we have an x-by-x with holes?

  • @DuffTerrall
    @DuffTerrall Před 7 měsíci

    Simp's points.from this one game already exceed the ELO of a 100 rated player. Fantastic.

  • @Nonotthecolour
    @Nonotthecolour Před 7 měsíci

    Simp is crazy good

  • @Ilo722
    @Ilo722 Před 7 měsíci

    You should check out villagers chess, I'm #2 in that variation >.

  • @blc_cat6937
    @blc_cat6937 Před 7 měsíci +1

    Why no disclaimer? :(

  • @EdKolis
    @EdKolis Před 7 měsíci

    Do the pawns on a/b/g/h promote on the sixth/third rank or do they just get trapped?

  • @erichsu3325
    @erichsu3325 Před 7 měsíci

    the fact that simp only pointed out 2000 on blitz but not bullet (2120)

  • @n0br.a1n
    @n0br.a1n Před 7 měsíci

    Simp definitely lost the second game lol

  • @dvorakgigachad1444
    @dvorakgigachad1444 Před 7 měsíci

    Simp is brilliant

  • @crimsonvale7337
    @crimsonvale7337 Před 7 měsíci +3

    first
    edit: I love how savage you are this video

  • @NoomStuff
    @NoomStuff Před 7 měsíci

    Video 62 of asking simp to play fps chess

  • @immunemarmot6896
    @immunemarmot6896 Před 7 měsíci

    Did you deliberately replace all the appearance of the word pawn in the subtitles with porn?

  • @blc_cat6937
    @blc_cat6937 Před 7 měsíci

    Hello

  • @aidoncooper2860
    @aidoncooper2860 Před 7 měsíci +1

    bruh my comments were deleted

    • @SoFaB_
      @SoFaB_ Před 7 měsíci

      Nice

    • @Oler-yx7xj
      @Oler-yx7xj Před 7 měsíci +2

      Which "second" comment is the first second and which is the second second

    • @aidoncooper2860
      @aidoncooper2860 Před 7 měsíci +2

      the first second was second

  • @CyberSurvivor44
    @CyberSurvivor44 Před 7 měsíci +1

    I only watch these for the disclaimer. Disliked.

  • @jacksonbowen3576
    @jacksonbowen3576 Před 7 měsíci

    Fake video. Everyone knows en passant is forced so you must have faked this

  • @staswisniewski4101
    @staswisniewski4101 Před 7 měsíci

    Google en passant

  • @Rookiebookem
    @Rookiebookem Před 7 měsíci +1

    Borst

  • @aidoncooper2860
    @aidoncooper2860 Před 7 měsíci +1

    1st second

  • @aidoncooper2860
    @aidoncooper2860 Před 7 měsíci +1

    second